Chapter Text
"It has been a month since the death of Fukuchi.
It was a national shock how the national hero that has saved the world countless times was actually the head of humanity's impending doom.
Not only that, but after all that happened, the Armed Detective Agency and the Port Mafia have both suffered great damages.
People still held some suspicions over the ada, which gave them less jobs, and after SOMEONE had blown up the main pm skyscrapers and most of the members died due to the vampire infection, much was left to be desired.
It was pretty much the end of a war, after all.
However, one of the things that's currently uniting the two organizations the most is, of course, gossip .
You see, the two double blacks have defeated Fukuchi together, as a symbol of hope and passing the candle onto the next or whatever Dazai was making a speech about in the joint party that barely anyone cared to listen to unless they're actually invested in this generational coupling ritual, but I, Kudikida, am not.
The focus of the gossip is that, after this whole chaos, the two couples may surprisingly turn into actual couples.
You see, after Akutagawa has sacrificed himself for Atsushi and kept his no-killing promise even while in a state of mind control, Atsushi has grown rather "fond" of the other man. Which is, of course, visible to EVERYONE THAT SEES THEM TOGETHER. KATAI YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND IF I SEE HIM GAZE AT THAT MAFIA EXECUTIVE WITH THAT TOOTH-ROTTING HONEY GAZE I MIGHT TURN HIM INTO A FINE TIGER FUR RUG. Akutagawa also seems to share the same feelings for him, perhaps for longer, but it looks like he has quite the hard time distinguishing platonic and romantic feelings and gestures, perhaps too busy burying himself into work (I wish we hired him). For example, two weeks ago, Atsushi asked him out on a date, and in the middle of it Akutagawa says, and I quote, "So who's this mission's target?" which of course resulted into a fight between the duo.
I do not approve of them.
The first double black, on the other hand, are currently acting as if they're a couple that has committed to divorce four years ago but just now their child is saying that they miss when they were together so they're trying to hang out and talk more and they feel the spark coming back but they think that things will never go back to how they used to be or they don't deserve it or whatever THERE'S NOT EVEN A CHILD I CAN USE AS AN EXAMPLE THEY'RE JUST MAKING SHIT UP CAUSE THEY'RE PUSSIES. They're 22, not 16, stop thinking about how your parents are gonna react to your boyfriend and just get together dear lord. I once saw Dazai hiding a horrendous home-made hat with a writing on the lace saying "slug♡" that he never ended up giving to him for some fucking reason i cannot fathom. He better give it to him soon since he doesn't have a lot of time before I forcibly throw him off of that damn roof and maybe even to another country so I don't see that parasite ever again.
I don't approve of them either.
Everyone is excited to see how these two duos are gonna end up in this sit-rom-com, except me since I actually have some brains. Please don't point out how it's suspicious that I know everything about it while I claim to not care about the matter, it is not suspicious and I truly do not care.
This is your monthly summary of the agency's happenings, please feel free to ask me any questions and do remember to take care of yourse-"
“Kunikida-san?"
The aforementioned man interrupts his rapid keyboard clicking, looking up at whoever is requesting of him. He thanks all the heavens above that it's the most bearable member of the ada, Tanizaki. "Do you need anything?"
At that, Tanizaki nods. "The boss of the Port Mafia is requesting of you."
Hearing that, Kunikida wants to go back to writing already.
“Kunikida-kun, right? I’ve heard alot about you." His voice is annoyingly sweet.
Kunikida clicks his pen that he just picked up along the way so he could have something to occupy his hands with during the meeting. “I’d prefer if you used my surname, or atleast a more formal honorific.” he clears his throat to go back on topic, there is NO time to spend around, every second passed here equals to more work he could be doing instead. “ Which member of the Armed Detective Agency will join the Port Mafia is the topic of today’s meeting, am I correct?”
Kunikida honestly dreaded the coming of this meeting. The President had made this deal at the start of the conflict, almost everyone had forgotten about it. Everyone but Mori and him, that is. And now, not only must one of his dear colleagues leave the job, but they have to join the ENEMY ORGANIZATION which is literally the mafia. AND he has to choose who, since Fukuzawa is recovering in the hospital and he’s the President until he’s healed. It’s like the damages of the conflict will never fully be over.
“You get to the point fast, I’m amazed!” He unnecessarily praises him.
Kunikida nods firmly. “I’m aware that your first option would be Dazai, but trust me, he-”
“Would first cut down my throat and then burn the Port Mafia down to the point of no return. So no, I’d rather not.” Kunikida is relieved that he doesn’t have to use one of his power point presentations about why Dazai entering the Port Mafia again would be a horrible idea. “Plus, I unfortunately promised Fukuzawa-dono that I would not force Yosano to enter. Ranpo-kun would be an awful candidate since he only does the work he wants to do and he most likely wouldn’t do anything for us. Next is you. But, no offense intended, you wouldn’t fit in the Port Mafia very well.” Kunikida scoffs. “And neither would that tiger kid, he’s good for my plans where he is right now.” What even are this man’s plans? Kunikida just can’t figure him out. “So that leaves us with Tanizaki-kun and Kenji-kun.” the temporary president nods at that. Deep down, he’s glad that he didn’t have to say as much as he planned to.
“I admit that unlike me, Tanizaki would fit in perfectly.” hearing that, Mori smiles. “But! Without his sister, Naomi, the rate of getting betrayed by him is higher than the sky. He wouldn’t be a loyal unit.”
“I see.” He gathers his hands together in fist shapes. “Kenji-kun it is, then.”
Kunikida nods. Actually, he’s quite worried for Kenji. But this is the only option, and he agreed to it too. Kunikida can’t help but feel worried for the blond, but he trusts him. And he trusts that Kenji won’t change his way too much. He hopes that he might change someone’s way too, actually.
Perhaps, he can be the only one that can do any good in the hands of the Port Mafia.
A light press, causing an audible short lived sound being born, but resulting into the room becoming seeable. A gasp shortly follows. “This will be your room until the boss’ orders stand.” Both of them eye at every nook and cranny of the room. Walls tinted of a striped dark and bright red, textile black floor, countless shelves surrounding the rooms with either plants or flowers or pictures of the past, an air conditioner of great quality, a dark wooden hat stand right next to the door, a dark wooden bureau adorned with a red rose, perhaps a gift from the past. Quite weird how it didn’t have a computer, perhaps it was taken away to have less communication with the outside world? Next to the expensive black lace curtains lingered the queen sized bed, mattress made out of the softest marshmallows and two rose-patterned pillows on top of one that seemed like a straight line, how weird. But what was weirder was the bookshelf, filled to the brim with books of theater plays or musicals, perhaps an unique interest of the owner.
“Do you like it?”
“Where’s the tv?”
“Oh, just go to the living room on the first floor for that. Didn’t really feel like buying more than one since I do not spend a lot of time watching programs.”
“Ah, I see! Then, do you not have a lot of time to go shopping for food?”
Chuuya quirks an eyebrow, surprised by the extremely out of topic question. “Uhm, no. Lower rank members take care of that for me.”
“Ah, no, that’s not good! Grocery shopping in the city is a healing experience each and every time, you should accomplish it as many times as possible!” Kenji scolds the mafia executive’s habits.
Said executive just feels more confused at the reply. “...Healing experience..?”
“We should go grocery shopping every weekend, Chuuya-san!”
More than ever, Chuuya now feels like he has just adopted a child into his penthouse. “Whatever.” he mutters, deep down fantasizing about the upcoming future already. “The boss wants to test you, kid. You know how the Port Mafia has been doing lately, yeah? Go to his office today at 7:45pm and don’t be late.”
“But where is it?” A genuine question.
Chuuya stares at him. Kenji, a 14yo kid from the Armed Detective Agency who before this he has only interacted with twice. Once in a fight where he couldn’t stop throwing punches and praises at him, and another where they had lunch together and he couldn’t stop throwing praises at him, once again. A golden hearted child for sure. Knowing that the Agency has forced this innocent child to enter the world of crime makes the executive want to go inside of the building and blow it up with gravity along with all of the workers, making sure to strangle real good who’s currently in charge and also Dazai just because it’s Dazai (What a shame that they’re currently on a ceasefire, really.) But destiny seems to keep interwining the two of them, seeing how now the boss has ordered him to take care of and train Kenji until he reaches the age of 15. How hilarious of him to ask so. But it’s not like Chuuya minds the fact much. Kenji is a pretty cool kid, after all. “...I’ll take you there, alright? I’m coming back home at 5:30pm and then we’re out of my home.”
“Wow, Chuuya-san, your kindness towards me is never ending! I just wonder if I’ll ever be able to pay you back…” Kenji looks at his new fancy bedroom, face filled with worry, perhaps compassion is an old habit of his. “Ah, right! Since I’ll be staying in your penthouse for a year, could I call this my home for the time being like you do?”
What a weird request, Chuuya thinks. Mafia members don’t have a thing such as a home, he just calls it that because it sounds like a more fitting term, but in the 5 years that he has spent in this penthouse he has barely ever felt truly at home. And now, this random kid from an enemy organization wants to call it his new home? What, will he want him to fill the adoption papers and get him a mom next?
Chuuya looks at Kenji’s innocent eyes before speaking up, a mistake.
“Oh, sure.” What.
“Alright then, I’ll be sure to keep our home clean, Chuuya-san!”
Nakahara Chuuya still has to know that this weakness of his towards this “innocent child” will become the reason for many of his future regrets.
The door opens ever so slightly, with the carefulness of a swan.
"Ah, Chuuya-kun! I see that you've bought Kenji-kun with you, how lovely! It's good to see that the two of you are getting along already." The boss smiles sweetly, his eyes seemingly tired. Since the skyscraper got blown up in the war times, the main mafia base has been set underground, away from the blue sky and away from the blazing sun. Quite the new thing, considering that's where it has been residing in luxury for decades. But permanence is decadent. Apart from the boss comfortably sitting at the far end of the long wooden table, two other mafiosi are seated. Kouyou and Akutagawa, the two other executives of the Port Mafia, the latter a new addition after the grand win against that god of weapons. They all take a good look at Kenji, probably thinking about how his farmer clothes might be unfitting for a mafia member.
Chuuya nods solemnly, taking his hat off to pay respects to his boss. "I'll do my best with Miyazawa." His surname only, to give them some sort of distance, to show everyone that he didn't get attached to some kid oh so easily.
"I trust you with that, Chuuya-kun. Now please, sit down, today's meeting might be long and boring." Chuuya and Kenji comply with the request, Chuuya sitting next to Kouyou and Kenji sitting next to Chuuya, like two baby ducks following their adult figure. "I'm sure you all know what the topic is already, so let's make it short: have any of you gotten any ideas for where to hide the new Port Mafia main base?"
Kouyou slightly raises her mini fan adorned with cherry tree petals. "Perhaps under a love hotel? The business there is never ending."
Half of the room is flushed by the thought of managing such a company. Mori speaks up for the other two. "That's too much money spent for making the hotel, too much money spent for the needed personnel and too much money to keep everything secure. Plus, many in the PM are minors like Kenji-kun here, so they wouldn't be able to use that as a fake job or as a cover. But I'll keep it in mind." The last phrase raises the discomfort for the future. "Well, one of my thoughts was to take a small part of Suribachi City under control."
Hearing that, the same two from before gain a lonely gaze into nothingness. "That's enemy territory, it's better to keep ourselves to Yokohama only." Chuuya replies while Kenji looks at him with puzzled thoughts.
"I see." Mori lays his chin upon his interlocked hands. "Any other ideas?"
Suddenly, erupting everyone's shock and surprise, Kenji raises his hand up, like a child wanting to answer the teacher's question. "Me, me!" Mori nods at him to give him permission to talk, a worrying smile on his lips. "I say we open a pizza place!"
Life pauses as the phrase ends.