Chapter Text
Eyes focused on the ground Katsuki refuses to raise his head. He's just barely holding himself together and he fears that if he looks up to see his teacher's cold, peircing gaze all that effort will be for nul. He shakes with visible anger, everything is Deku's fault, he thinks. It has always been Deku's fault, he's the victim, he was the one subjected to years of torture by the little prick's quirk. No one understands what Deku has put him through. But why would they understand or even try too, Deku was the small and innocent one while he was the explosive teen, always angry and aggressive.
Katsuki holds back a sob. Even thinking about all those years is enough to terrify him, Deku's quirk has caused him a lot of mental trauma which no one has yet to realise even half way through the year. No one has realised his suffering yet they've payed attention to the smallest flinch or the stuttering every time Deku's around him.
He lets out a frustrated cry as he grabs a fist full of his hair. He can't handle all this stress, he may have hidden his feelings but he expected his so called friends, the ones that he tried his absolute hardest to become comfortable around, to atleast realise what he's going through. Even if it wasn't his friends, even if it was just one person, maybe then he'd finally have someone who understands him, who isn't tricked by Deku's cute persona. He grabs his hair tighter.
"Bakugo stop that." He feels a tug at his hand and slowly starts to uncurl his fingers allowing his hair to breathe once again. He looks up at his teachers expressionless face which was a terrible idea as his previous fears come to pass and all his emotions start to spill out one by one.
First it's distress, he makes a faint wheezing sound as he tries to stop his tears from flowing. Then it's considerable anger, anger directed towards his teacher, towards his idiot classmates and especially towards Deku. He bites his lip as the anger then bubbles into sorrow, by this point he just completely breaks down, but at no point does he feel guilt. He's a fit of sobs as Aizawa just watches, patiently waiting for him to finish.
Eventually the sobs do slow as does time as well as the faint ticking of the clock sound in the background and the two stay in silence. It seems like Aizawa Sensei is waiting for him to speak but he's going to be waiting for a long time as Katsuki doesn't have a single thing he wants to say to him.
The teacher sighs. "Are you done? Will you speak now?" Katsuki just ignores his questions, eyes set firmly on the ground. Soon enough another sigh can be heard from the teacher.
"Okay then, have it your way. An investigation will be conducted on you and your middle school, depending on what we find you could be kicked out of the hero course or even expelled." Katsuki tenses up not wanting his anger to bubble over. "This is your time now to admit to what you've done and maybe the punishment won't be as bad."
"What won't be as bad as getting kicked off the hero course?" Katsuki asks in barley a whisper, teeth clenched and tears seconds away from spilling over. "Why do I need to admit to what I've done, what about Deku?" He shakes, his finger nails digging into his clenched fists. "Why am I the only one being punished, why am I the only one getting questioned?"
"Midoriya isn't in the right head space right now so I'll be questioning him later."
Katsuki snaps, springing out of his chair, his voiced raised as tears once again stream down his face. "So what exactly are you trying to say? Does it look like I'm in the correct head space right now!"
"Bakugo calm down."
"Calm down!" He bangs his fist against the table. "CALM DOWN! DON'T FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!"
"Bakugo stop it!" Aizawa gets up as well now, mildly pissed.
"Stop what? You told me to calm down, how can anyone just calm down in this situation. If someone else telling others to calm down actually worked maybe I wouldn't be here right now despising the sheer mention of Deku!"
"Bakugo-"
"I'm not the villian of this story I'm the victim, but of course no one would agree. There's no way I could be the victim right! I'm the aggressive looking teen so I must be the villian right! FORGET DEKU THIS IS ALL MY FAULT, RIGHT!"
"BAKUGO!" Finally coming back to his senses Katsuki stops. Making the mistake of looking up to see his teachers face, he sits back down in fear, face buried in his arms. Aizawa had that same disapproving look, that look as if Katsuki was absolute scum, that look as if just his mere existence pissed him off.
The same look as his so called friends and classmates.
Completely done with this situation Aizawa gets up. "Go back to your dorm, obviously your not ready to talk so we'll deal with this later. I want you away from Midoriya, if I hear even a word of you anywhere near him I promise things won't end well." Without another word Aizawa walks out the room leaving Katsuki alone and shaking with tears.
____
Katsuki walks up to the dorm building, too stuck in his own head space to realise that he's already right outside the door. He reaches for the handle then freezes, he could clearly hear his classmates inside watching a movie which meant he'd have to go pass all of them. He'd have to see the detesting looks they all send his way, he'd have to feel the judgement and disgust of the ones he had once thought of as friends, he'd have to once again face the trauma associated with the word friend. But worst of all he'd have to see Deku, all the extras surrounding him as if to protect him from the monster they see as Katsuki. Deku and his innocent expressions as he tries to calm everyone down, as he makes everyone feel sorry for him and despise Katsuki all the more.
Katsuki huffs, snapping himself out of his overthinking. Taking a deep breath he opens the door knowing he's got no choice but to suck it up. This was only a small obstacle, he'd just have to pass by them before he's able to lock himself in his room and ignore everyone and everything. Taking another deep breath he opens the door and charges into the dorm trying his best not to make eye contact with any of his classmates. He marches his way past them but can clearly feel every person staring at him, it was as if their stares were burning holes into his back.
"Kacchan-"
Katsuki grits his teeth. Deku was the last person he'd want to talk to right now but from the corner of his eye he sees the nerd get up and go over to him.
"Kacchan wait." Katsuki doesn't wait, infact he walks even faster yet he somehow ends up being grabbed by the nerd and in a moment of anger ends up pushing him away.
This immediately gets the class alert as they all rush over to protect Deku, seeing Katsuki's actions as an act of violence, like Deku wasn't the one who grabbed him first without permission.
"Bakugo what on earth do you think you're doing!" Uraraka shouts, getting up from the nerds side to go confront Katsuki straight to his face. "How can you be so cruel as to bully him and even tell him to off himself yet still have the balls to push him around!"
"He fucking grabbed me!" Katsuki shouts back. "If you know you have so much to say then tell the idiot to keep his hands to himsel-" The sound of a slap resonates through the room and everyone falls silent as they watch a fuming Uraraka standing infront of Katsuki who's looking like a tamed beast.
Katsuki grits his teeth trying his best to not let his anger out. Instead of snapping at pink cheeks he turns to Deku, the nerds expression of concern pissing him off. "Are you happy now." He says, feeling more pitiful for the nerd than angry. "This is what you wanted isn't it, some stupid fucking friends. Congratulations the whole class is backing you, but I highly doubt it's due to their own free will since you're pathetic like that."
"Katsuki!" He looks over to Eijirou who's looking really pissed right now, he can't bring himself to say anything. "Just stop talking would you, you're making things worse. Just leave." Katsuki wasn't going to lie, that really hurt. His best friend, he was the first person he's ever allowed to crawl into his life after everything that Deku had done to him. And now he was backing Deku, seeing Katsuki as a monster for something that wasn't his fault.
"That's what I was trying to do before your beloved Deku grabbed me without permission."
"Guys don't be so hard on him, he can stay if he wants to, it's his dorm as well."
"Shut up, I don't need your pity." Katsuki spits, his despise for the nerd evident.
"It's not pity, I'm just stating the truth." Katsuki growls as he turns on his heel away from his classmates and up to his room.
"I will be telling Mr Aizawa about this!" Iida calls out, Katsuki just grits his teeth harder, done with the classes bullshit.
____
As soon as Katsuki enters his room he locks the door behind him and collapses onto his bed. He lies there, face down into the pillow as he sniffles but no tears come out. His tears had dried up a long time ago, the whole situation just got him so frustrated that he couldn't help but cry as Aizawa interrogated him. He hated this, he hated everything. He hated his classmates, he hated his teacher but he didn't really, what he really hated was being so weak. He hated the fact that he cried so easily, that he's so easily accepted defeat. What he hated even more was his feelings towards Deku, not feelings of pure hatred or loathing, but feelings of terror. He hated the fear Deku inflicted upon him, he hated how no one realised that, he hated how good Deku was at getting everyone over to his side without even trying.
How things even ended up like this was all a blur. Katsuki wishes he could have atleast prepared himself for what was going to happen, that there was atleast some kind of hint. But then again he guesses there was, he just didn't see it, he got too comfortable and assumed Deku wouldn't tell anyone. He hated that too.
____
Walking into the classroom Katsuki couldn't help but notice Half 'n half's peircing gaze. He had been silently staring at him for two weeks now as if he was angry at him but Katsuki had no idea why.
Aizawa had walked in for their usual general heroics class and everyone sat up straight in their seats. He sighed as he started to assign the class's work for the rest of the lesson.
"I want you all to complete a presentation based on the research that you all conducted two days ago. You will be working in pairs so the person infront just turn around and work with the person behind you, and then the people in the front row just work with the person next to you."
Without wasting a single second Todoroki raises his hand looking clearly upset. "I don't think that's a good idea Aizawa Sensei."
Looking pissed Aizawa sighs. "And why not?"
Katsuki clearly catches the disguted look Todoroki aims at him before he's shaking his head and putting his arm down. "Nevermind."
"Well then if no one else has any irrelevant objections then hurry up and get on with your work."
The class do as he says while Aizawa makes himself comfortable in his sleeping bag. Katsuki begrudgingly turns around to face Deku. He hated his guts and didn't want to work with him but right then it wasn't like he had a choice. The nerd starts to talk and just his voice sent chills up Katsuki's spine, he kept his head low making sure to never make eye contact with him, occasionally Katsuki would let out a grunt or a sound of agreement but never actively talked to him. Katsuki knew that Deku wouldn't try and put him under his quirk here but the paranoia was hard to get over, it was obvious that Deku was starting to get fed up.
Throughout the lesson Katsuki couldn't help but pay attention to Icyhot's various looks of concern for Deku but anger directed at him. Just as Katsuki was having enough of Half 'n half's weird behaviour Deku slams his hand against the table causing Katsuki to flinch.
"Kacchan, focus." The asshole says in a commanding tone only stimulating Katsuki's PTSD and in turn his anger.
"Fuck off asshole. Don't tell me what to do."
"Don't talk to Midoriya like that!" Todoroki yells finally snapping, bring the whole class and Aizawa Sensei's attention to him.
"Mind your own business Icyhot, I don't know why you're getting involved!"
"Why wouldn't I get involved, he told me what you said to him. I can't believe you could do something so despicable yet have no remorse at all and talk to him like that."
"Hey Todoroki calm down, it's alright." Deku says to no avail.
"No it's not alright!" He continues to yell. "You're much too forgiving, the fact that he can even consider himself a hero disgusts me!"
Aizawa Sensei stands up clearly upset. "Todoroki sit down, you too Bakugo! Stop this at once!"
"Stop what?" Katsuki fires back. "He's the one who started it, yelling at me for no reason."
"Of course there was a reason. Your a stuck up, selfish monster, that's the reason."
"The fuck did you just call me! You-"
"Both of you enough!" Aizawa yells finally at his limit. "Sit down now unless you both want to be put on house arrest! We'll talk about this after class!"
"What's there to talk about, he might as well just tell you now."
"Todoroki stop it." Deku pleads but right now Todoroki was too consumed with rage to even make out his words.
"Go on Bakugo, tell them all what you said to Midoriya."
"What the fuck are you talking about, you stupid piece of shit."
"Tell them what you said to him in Middle School!"
Katsuki pauses, overcome with suprise. He looks at Deku, an expression of worry and concern plastered on his face and Katsuki can't help but be overcome by rage. "You told him." He snarls, his hands balled into a fist.
"Of course I told him." Deku says, his stupid fake concern still all over his face. "He's my friend, why wouldn't I tell him."
"What? Did you think he would keep it a secret for the rest of his life! He has every right to tell me and it's a good thing he did!"
"Both of you sit down now!" Aizawa yells again banging his fist against the wall but Todoroki stays perfectly still glaring Katsuki down.
"Not until he tells them." He demands. "Go on Bakugo, tell them! Tell them how you used to bully Midoriya in middle school!"
"Todoroki-kun, stop it-"
"-Tell them how you would always use your fucking quirk against him!"
"The fuck are you saying asshole!"
"Stop pretending, he's got the scars to prove it."
"Todoroki stop!" Aizawa calls out this time.
"Bakugo tell them how you fucking told him to kill himself!" The silence that comes after that is deafening, even Aizawa Sensei who had been previously annoyed was too stunned to speak. "He told me exactly what you said, 'Take a swan dive off the roof of the building and hope for a better quirk in your next life'. How could you say that, you're fucking sick in the head."
Katsuki says nothing, just stands there staring at the floor trembling slightly, his fist clenched so tight that his nails start drawing blood. He didn't blame Todoroki for a thing, he blamed fucking Deku for not telling the full story. He turns to the nerd who almost has a look of fear on his face but Katsuki knows he's hiding his twisted joy.
"Bakugo." Aizawa Sensei says. "Is all what Todoroki said true." Katsuki refuses to answer so Aizawa asks once again, this time his voice louder and more commanding. "I said is everything that Todoroki said true!"
As Katsuki continues to refuse to answer and the tension only becomes worst Deku rushes infront of Katsuki as if to protect him from the class. "Please don't be so hard on Kacchan, that was all back in middle school and he knows better than to do any of those things now."
"So you're admitting that its true?"
Deku looks down guiltily as if he hadn't just fulfilled his actual intentions. Refusing to meet anyone's gaze he slowly nods and Aizawa let's out the rage he's been holding in.
"Bakugo stand outside, I will talk to you after class. The rest of you get on with your work, Iida you're in charge. I will be back."
Katsuki grits his teeth as he stares daggers at Deku. "Happy now, this is what you wanted right?" He snarls causing Todoroki to drag Deku away from him.
Todoroki glares at him, prepared for even the slightest sign of hostile behaviour. "You heard Sensei, go stand outside."
"You're friends with a phsyco." Katsuki spits out before marching through the door at full speed but he doesn't miss the judging gazes of his classmates, even the ones he thought as friends.
He didn't realise they'd all fall for Deku's innocent act so easily.
____
Katsuki hears a knock on his door but he ignores it, he didn't feel like getting criticised once again for who knows what time today. Whoever's at the door knocks again this time harder not relenting until Katsuki finally gets up and opens the door.
"What do you want?" Katsuki growls, no real malice behind it. "Whatever you want to say, I don't want to hear it."
Standing at the door is Eijirou, a grim expression on his face. "I don't have anything I want to say. I just thought you'd need someone by your side."
"What?" Katsuki says confused. "Don't you hate me?"
"It's true that what you said is messed up, and there's no excuse you can make for saying something so despicable, but we've been friends for quite a while now which means I can tell that you're probably going through just as hard of a time as Midoriya right now. That's why I thought I should atleast be here even if I'm upset with you, if I'm not here who else would be you know."
Katsuki just stares at him completely bewildered. He opens his door wider allowing him to come in as tears prickle his eyes. "Do what you want." He say and goes back to sit on his bed.
Eijirou walks in and takes a seat at Katsuki's desk. They both sit there in silence but to be frank it really did make Katsuki feel better. It allowed him to put his faith back in people, to not give up on friendship. Tears that Katsuki had thought had dried up long ago start to trickle down his face and Katsuki just lets them. Eijirou just watches as Katsuki cries but him just being there is enough to sooth the tears.