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God that motherfucker was cute.
No, not cute. He was motherfuckin SEXY is what he was and Gamzee was was not going to spend another motherfucking second standing here when he could be chatting up that absolute babe over there. He took great long swaggery steps in the direction of his target, hands shoved deep in his pockets and dark hair flopping in his face.
Tavros sat on the hard bench in the bus shelter, legs crossed comfortably as he read the morning paper. Or really, just looked at the pictures; the paper's primary use was to stop people from starting up awkward conversation with him. A breeze blew past and ruffled his soft brown hair, shaved on one side. He readjusted it, and as he did so, he looked up over the top of his paper to see what was quite possibly the scariest man he had ever seen slowly but surely approaching him from across the street. The man in polka dot pants jaywalked across the empty busy street and oh god the bus couldn't possibly have the good fortune to miraculously show up right now could it?
A quick glance at the electric sign displaying real time changes to bus routes flashed that bus 612 was running late.
Shit shit shit. Maybe he'll just go away...?
Gamzee looked at the boy at the bus stop, directly in front of him now. As he crossed the street he watched the boy's expression change from blank disinterest to surprise and fear.
He must be shy, Gamzee figured. Gotta be motherfuckin chill and take this real slow like then.
"Sup," he said as he stepped up onto the curb.
"Uhhh, hi," Tavros stammered, hands halfway between reopening the paper and closing it completely. His eyes darted down to see if there was enough room on the bench to the left of him for another person. To his dismay, there was, and Gamzee took the slight eye flicker as an invitation to sit down.
"The name's Gamzee," he drawled out, slow and gravelly. "What's yours, man?"
"... Tavros."
Gamzee smiled briefly, revealing crooked teeth. "You're pretty shy for a tough lookin motherfucker, Tavros."
Tavros instantly looked down at himself: black converse, ripped jeans, an old concert shirt... Yeah, it was probably the shirt.
"I used to love this band years ago," he said suddenly, "I went to their concert once, and I got this shirt, and I haven't grown since so..." He faltered. "Uhh, it still fits."
Gamzee looked down; he hadn't noticed the shirt before. "That band is the shit, man," he said.
"Oh! Uhh, thanks!" Tavros chirped. "Uhh, I mean, yeah, I think they're pretty great too."
"So what're you doing tonight?" Gamzee watched Tavros expectantly.
Tavros wasn't entirely sure he heard the question correctly because it came right out of the blue what the fuck. "I'm, uhh, well, why are you asking?"
Gamzee narrowed his already half closed eyes. "You like dudes, right?"
"Uhhhhhh, I mean," Tavros silently wondered if the world could possibly open up and swallow him whole right now please and thank you, "yeah, I guess, I mean, I haven't really told anyone before but... Yeah."
"Nice," Gamzee nodded appreciatively and raked his hair back. He saw a blue transit bus turn the corner several blocks away. "That's not yours, is it?"
Tavros squinted, trying to read the number. He suppressed the bubble of joy threatening to explode in his chest. "Yeah, I think it is."
"Motherfucker goddamnit," Gamzee muttered. Then, shoving his hand deep into his pocket, he rummaged around and pulled out a mostly clean napkin and a pen, the end of which he licked before scribbling something on the edge of the napkin and tossing it at Tavros, who caught it just as the bus began to slow to a stop.
"Text me," he said, an unreadable grin on his face, before he stood and vanished into the park behind the bus stop. Tavros stood and numbly stuffed the napkin into the pocket of his jeans, folded his newspaper, and walked into the bus.
...
Late that night, Tavros arrived back at his apartment. Exhausted, he flopped into the nearest chair and out of habit reached into his pocket to check for any change he could add to the pink ceramic piggy bank on the table. Instead, he pulled out what looked like a crumpled handkerchief. The events of earlier that day came rushing back in a burst of anxiety; Tavros's hands on autopilot unfolded the napkin, smoothing out the edge, and stared at the scrawled number in painful indecision.
Suddenly he stood up to pull his phone out of his back pocket, and frantically texted the first person in his contacts list.
Tavros: dAVE i THINK I MIGHT NEED SOME HELP
Dave: your phones doing that thing again with the inverse case
Tavros: tHAT IS IRRELEVANT AT THE MOMENT I THINK,,,, I HAVE MORE PRESSING ISSUES
Dave: alright then whats up
Tavros: a REALLY SCARY GUY GAVE ME HIS NUMBER TODAY AND i DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT
Tavros: oKAY, THERE WAS PROBABLY A BETTER WAY TO PUT THAT,,,, BUT i CAN’T REALLY THINK STRAIGHT RIGHT NOW
Tavros: i KIND OF WANT TO TEXT HIM,,,, BUT i’M ALSO FREAKING OUT,,,, A LOT
Dave: whoa tavvy slow your roll for a sec
Tavros stopped mid-word and gently set his phone down on the table, hands shaking. It was a full minute before he heard his phone chime twice and display the messages from Dave.
Dave: ok so what happened exactly like if you want me to help you i am gonna need the full story cause i cant give you solid advice based only on what youve already told me
Dave: just start from the beginning and take as long as you need
Tavros picked up his phone again and began typing out a long message to Dave.
Tavros: i WAS WAITING FOR THE BUS LIKE I ALWAYS DO, READING THE PAPER, WHEN SUDDENLY THIS GUY CROSSES THE STREET TO COME TALK TO ME,,,,,, hE SEEMS PRETTY CHILL BUT,, HE’S REALLY TALL,,,,,,, AND KIND OF SCARY,,,,,,,,,,,, aNYWAY BEFORE THE BUS SHOWED UP WE TALKED FOR A BIT AND HE LIKED MY BAND SHIRT,,,, tHEN HE GAVE ME HIS NUMBER AND LEFT
He hit send. This time the reply from Dave was nearly instantaneous.
Dave: is he cute
Tavros had no idea how to respond to that.
Tavros: i MEAN,,,, i GUESS,, i DON’T REALLY KNOW WHAT i THINK,,,,,,, hE SEEMED NICE
He could practically hear Dave sighing emphatically on the other end before his phone chimed several times in a row.
Dave: tavros you are not making this easy for me
Dave: the best advice i can give you would be to just take the shot like just fucking go for it
Dave: worst case scenario you wind up ditching the date via the bathroom window or something
Dave: honestly most likely scenario if you guys are compatible you could wind up bffs or boyfriends even if it turns out you like him like i am pretty fuckin sure the benefits are gonna far outweigh the possible negatives here
Dave: seriously dude just go for it send him a text and i am here to help if you have trouble figuring out what to say
It made Tavros feel a little better knowing Dave had his back. Emboldened, he inputted the number as a new contact and typed out a message.
Tavros: hEY,, IT’S tAVROS
Okay. He cannot fuck this up. There is practically no way he can fuck this up. His phone chimed almost immediately and his heart nearly stopped as he fumbled to try and read it.
It was from Dave.
Dave: did you text him yet
Tavros nearly pissed himself in relief and annoyance.
Tavros: yEAH, JUST NOW,,,, i’M WAITING FOR A REPLY
Dave: good luck man you got this
He got another message almost immediately.
Gamzee: SuP bRo :o)
Okay. Here goes nothing.
They talked about menial things. Tavros found it surprisingly easy to share aspects of his life with Gamzee, perhaps because the other was also very forthcoming about his hobbies and interests. They both worked full time jobs, but while Tavros was doing so to put himself through an arts degree in medieval literature, Gamzee’s paychecks went, at least in part, towards financing his interest in marijuana. It was their shared interest in music, and rap in particular, that really got the conversation going. Tavros was almost reluctant to end the conversation so that he could go to bed, though Gamzee had one last thing to add.
Gamzee: WaNnA cHiLl ToMoRrOw? I hAvE tHe DaY oFf AnD wE cAn ToTeS gEt OuR rAp On Or SoMe ShIt
Gamzee: I kNoW a GuY wHo CaN gIvE uS sOmE bEaTs sO wE cAn MoThErFuCkIn Go OfF
Gamzee: MeEt Me At ThE cOrNeR oF 2nd AnD mAiN iF yOu'Re DoWn FoR tHiS sHiT
Was this what excitement felt like? Tavros wasn't sure. It felt like fear, but also like anticipation, as though he was looking forward to laying down some rhymes with Gamzee.
Tavros: yEAH,, OKAY
Tavros: :o)
Gamzee: FuCkInG nIcE, sEe YoU tHeN :o)
Oh my GOD he had to call Dave right now, he would want to hear about this and Tavros found himself absolutely dying to share the details with someone.
Dave sounded confused when he answered the phone. "Tavros? Why are you calling, what's up?"
"Dave!" Tavros's voice sounded higher pitched than normal, and he had no trouble letting the words flow. "Gamzee and I are going to chill tomorrow, and rap together! He has a friend who can make some beats!"
Dave was silent except for static; it appeared his brain was having a hard time catching up. "You guys talked then? That's awesome! Man I am really excited for you like you have no fuckin idea." Tavros thought Dave sounded more sleepy than excited, but knew the sentiment was there. "Hang on... Did Gamzee mention the name of his beats friend?"
It suddenly dawned on Tavros that Dave, with his strong interest in music and mixing, knew practically everyone else in the area with the same interests. There was a very good chance he knew Gamzee's friend.
"He didn't tell me," Tavros said, "but I could ask?"
"Go for it," was the reply. Tavros pulled his phone away from his ear and immediately began typing out a message to Gamzee.
Tavros: hEY, UHH,, WHAT'S THE NAME OF YOUR BEATS FRIEND,
The reply came quicker than expected.
Gamzee: SoLlUx CaPtOr
Tavros went to tell Dave. "It's-"
He was interrupted by another text, to which he replied quickly.
Gamzee: WhY yOu AsK bRo?
Tavros: i HAVE A FRIEND WHO MIXES TOO,, tHEY MIGHT KNOW EACH OTHER
Tavros put the phone back to his ear now. "His name is, uh, Sollux Captor," he said to Dave.
"Fuck," came Dave's reply. "Yeah, I know the kid. He's kinda weird but he can drop a good beat. We worked together once."
"Hang on," interrupted Tavros, "I got another text." He pulled his phone away to look.
Gamzee: CoOl BrO :o) We CaN aLl HaNg As A gRoUp SoMeTiMe
Tavros put the phone to his ear again. "He says we should all hang sometime."
"Who?" Dave sounded as though he had dozed off momentarily. "Oh yeah. Yeah that'd be bitchin I would totally be down. Anyway, you good?"
"Yeah, I think so. I'm good."
"Cool. Imma sleep then. Good luck on your date tomorrow."
Tavros let a breath he didn't realize he was holding go. "Thanks Dave."
"Anytime, man. Later." The line went dead.
...
The corner of 2nd and Main was just outside a lower class residential area, and immediately on the corner itself was a small grocery store. Also standing there, leaning against the lamppost while his long dark hair (with a purple ball cap jammed on top) shaded his face from the bright afternoon sun, was Gamzee. Tavros noticed much more than just his figure this time. In addition to being as thin as and nearly half the height of the 13-foot lamppost, his black hair at its longest wavy points nearly brushed his shoulders. His skin was a patchy two different shades of beige; it looked like makeup on his face though perhaps it was a skin condition. He had on jeans today and his nails glinted black when he stretched his hands, thumbs locked in his belt loops.
Tavros—5'8" and a little soft on the edges, wearing a similar outfit to the previous day plus a silver chain on his jeans—was suddenly very unsure of what he was about to get into.
(Un)fortunately, he was not given the opportunity to retreat as Gamzee took notice of him, and waved him over.
"Sup bro," he said, lifting his chin to bring his face out of the shadows. His eyes were a pale green, ringed with black eyeliner. Tavros's brown ones widened slightly. "Hey," he managed in reply.
"Ready to get your hang on?"
"Uh... Yeah," Tavros smiled weakly.
Gamzee grinned crookedly back. "Cool." He pushed himself up off the lamppost and began walking into the residential area. Tavros followed slightly behind until Gamzee looked over his shoulder, and beckoned Tavros to walk beside him.
"Where are we going?" Tavros asked as they turned a corner and ventured deeper into the streets lined with houses.
"My place," replied Gamzee. "I got the best motherfuckin sound system any fucker's ever laid ears on, the rap beats we'll lay down will be so fuckin sweet, just like a motherfucking miracle." He looked down at Tavros. Did that kid's eyes ever go back down to a normal size? "That cool with you bro?"
"Uhh," Tavros started, before saying with as much confidence as he could muster: "Yes."
Gamzee laughed, a deep seated chest rumble. "Nice." He pointed up ahead. "That's it."
It was small; from the outside, the house looked big enough for one, maybe two people at most. It was single story with an old red brick exterior, and a rusty eaves trough ran around the edge of the black shingled roof. Three worn cement steps led the way to the peeling red painted wood door. Gamzee unlocked it and they stepped inside.
Tavros followed Gamzee's lead and left his shoes on the leaf shaped mat near the door before walking down the low lit hall to the door that led down to the basement. A flight of worn concrete steps and Tavros's feet touched carpet.
The wall directly opposite the stairs was the most interesting: two large speakers hung in either corner (taped wires along the top of the grey walls suggested there were more elsewhere) and a table with a laptop and several other odd devices on it was cantered directly in between them. Sitting behind the table on a wooden stool was another skinny guy, though this one looked shorter than Tavros. He wore sunglasses with mismatched red and blue lenses. A curvy girl with bright red lipstick and eyelashes to match was listening to something through a pair of giant headphones, leaning on the skinny guy's shoulder. She looked up and smiled garishly at Gamzee before waving emphatically at Tavros; removing the headphones, she handed them back to the skinny guy who looped them around his neck.
"Who's your friend?" she asked Gamzee, voice sweet and melodic.
"This is Tavros." Tavros smiled and waved meekly as the other two looked at him. Gamzee pointed to the skinny guy. "That's Sollux," his finger shifted to the girl, "and that's Aradia."
Sollux didn't say anything, but Aradia walked right up to Tavros. “He’s cute,” she said, head tilted and thick curly hair falling to one side. Tavros felt his face go warm and he tried to ignore the feeling that Gamzee was staring at the side of his head.
“Gamzee,” Sollux lisped, “could you come here a sec?” Gamzee obliged, and while the two talked in low tones and listened to changes in the quiet beats as Sollux adjusted sliders and flicked buttons, Tavros wilted under the intense scrutiny of Aradia.
While Sollux was skilled at DJ-ing, his main skill set lay with computers and programming. He was able to combine the two interests somewhat in the creation of his techno-heavy beats and in coding his own personalized DJ programs that he used at parties and other events. It provided him the opportunity to fund his studies in computer science, as well as to help his friends (and himself) get laid.
He had met Aradia, an anthropology student, working a gig one night and they had been nearly inseparable since. Her enthusiasm and endless curiosity (in particular of death rituals) seemed like the polar opposite to Sollux's antisocial nature and apparent preference for androids to real people, but the two got along famously. It was uncommon to see one without the other by this point, and Gamzee didn't really mind her being in his basement along with Sollux. To be honest, it made it feel like a double date.
He listened to the new tracks Sollux was showing him, before selecting one for use. "Okay, Tavros," he said, "you motherfuckin ready for this?"
"Yes!" Tavros replied, much squeakier than he intended. Sollux snorted.
"Just keep it chill, bro," Gamzee said; Tavros sensed he was trying to be reassuring. "Follow my lead, and this'll be motherfuckin tight as shit."
It was motherfucking awkward as shit was what it was. But Gamzee kept the atmosphere really relaxed, and Tavros found if he focused on Gamzee's face enough he could forget that Sollux and Aradia were there. He channeled his inner rap god as much as possible, and his rhymes seemed to please Gamzee quite a bit. They took turns, playing off each other and sometimes alternating every other line in an almost conversational style. If Tavros managed to get on a roll, Gamzee would follow underneath with a hook and Sollux made subtle adjustments to the beat of the melody to suit the mood. Aradia bobbed her head and moved her body to the music. After a while, the words started to flow less easily, and they petered out, though Tavros felt pretty proud of what they had accomplished.
Sollux was less than impressed: "You guys have to be the worst rapping duo in the history of the entire universe." Aradia disagreed, also commenting on how she enjoyed the chance to groove a little bit.
Tavros found that, oddly, he only cared what Gamzee thought.
"That was motherfucking fly as shit!" he said, grinning lazily at Tavros. “They’ll call us the miracle bros cause our slams are flyin so high. We like PB n’ J we go together so fuckin good.” Tavros’s expression softened into one of quiet awe. Oh dear. What was this warm feeling? This was new.
"Sollux?" Aradia said, stirring Tavros from his emotional examination. She was staring at him and Gamzee curiously. "We should go now."
Sollux also seemed to be picking up something that had changed in the air. Standing, he shut the laptop that was apparently his, gathered up the other wires and boxes to leave the table bare, and followed his girlfriend up the stairs. He mumbled a See ya as he passed, though neither Gamzee nor Tavros really noticed.
They were alone now.
Tavros's funny warm feeling was quickly morphing into a funny terrified feeling. He thought his head might explode when Gamzee broke the silence. "Was that... Uh... Pretty motherfuckin tight for you too?"
"Yeah," Tavros smiled a little. "Yeah, that was pretty fun! Uh, I'd like to do it again sometime, I think."
"Good." Had they always been standing this close? Tavros wasn't sure. All he knew is his nose was very close to Gamzee's chest and he had no idea how to feel about that. He smelled oddly sweet. Tavros looked up and found himself eye to eye with Gamzee looking down; he felt his face heat up and his ears burn.
Something cool brushed his hand. He looked back down quickly to see Gamzee slowly interlock his long fingers with Tavros's own. If he'd thought his face couldn't get any warmer, he was wrong.
"Um..."
Gamzee looked at him quizzically. He started to loosen his grip on Tavros's hand, only to have Tavros tighten his in response. Both boys seemed equally surprised by that.
"Tavros," Gamzee began, scratching the top of his head with his free hand, "would you be cool with, fuckin, making out a little?"
Tavros felt his insides liquefy. Was he cool with it? He had no idea. Thinking about it now, he figured he did in fact find Gamzee at least somewhat attractive. They seemed to get along, too. He wondered what Dave would think; probably something like "do whatever you feel is best man like just go with your gut."
So go with his gut is what Tavros did.
Rising up onto his tiptoes, Tavros gently touched his lips to Gamzee's, who gratefully took the lead from that point on, placing his free hand on the back of Tavros's head and moving slowly but with intent. They kissed for a few minutes perhaps before pulling away, and Tavros found he had quite enjoyed it. A (decent sized) part of him wanted to do it again.
The look on Gamzee's face made Tavros's entire body heat up from head to toe and his head spin. He hardly took notice when Gamzee kissed him again but BOY did he notice when there was suddenly a hand up his shirt.
Time seemed to pass in a daze. Tavros left Gamzee's and walked down to the bus stop as the sun began to set behind the tops of the buildings; the ride home seemed to take both forever and no time at all. Before he knew it, he was staring at the ceiling while lying in bed, thinking about dark hair, green eyes, and black eyeliner. He vaguely wondered if Gamzee was doing the same about him.
He would be correct in that assumption.