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Tony had been trying to get Peter to call him ‘Tony’ instead of ‘Mr. Stark’ for months. The refusal started as something akin to a game, a bit, something of a joke between them. But the longer it went on, the more bothered he became by it. Eventually, he decided he was going to have to sit Peter down to talk about it.
“Pete, please. How many times do I have to ask you to call me Tony?” Tony questioned as the two of them worked side by side on the newest iteration of the spider-suit.
“Once more, as always, Mr. Stark,” Peter cheekily replied.
Rather than laugh as usual at the obvious banter, Tony grew contemplative. He understood that amongst the teasing, he’d never made it clear that he was serious. There was a small part of him that was worried he’d let the joke go on for too long. But he wanted to adress it. And after some thought, he decided that initiating that conversation sooner rather than later would probably be best “Hey, kid?” he questioned, already making his way toward the small break area. “Come sit with me for a minute. We need to talk.” He could sense Peter’s unease and smile reassuringly.
Even so, Peter looked nervous as he crossed the room towards the couch.
“I know we’ve been making light of it- you calling me Mr. Stark. But I wanted you to know that it actually bothers me when you call me that. Mr. Stark is how colleagues, coworkers, reporters, and random strangers address me. But I know you; you’re practically my kid. And because of that, you calling me Mr. Stark makes me feel kind of uncomfortable,” he said. He sighed and ran a hand down his face before reluctantly admitting, “That and, well, it reminds me of my dad.”
Peter bowed his head. Tony placed a hand on his shoulder to reassure him. “You’re fine, Bud. This is on me. I should have said something a long time ago,” he said.
When he was sure Peter had relaxed, he began to explain. “With my friends,” he said, then paused and tilted his head. “With my family- Tony is my preferred name. I would really appreciate it if you could try to call me Tony.”
Peter nodded his head a bit at his lip. “I mean, I can totally work on that but-” he said hesitantly began. “But I’m probably going to mess up a lot. It’s just that my Aunt May- and my Uncle Ben when he was here- they taught me that it wasn’t good manners to call an adult by just their first name. They said that calling them mister or misses was a sign of respect and I just really want to show you that respect Mr. Uh- Tony.”
“Would it help if I told you that using my preferred name, is being respectful?” Tony suggested.
Peter nodded his head. “I know that. I do. And I want to. It’s just that it’s a habit that’s been drilled into my head since I was a little kid. And I know that’s not an excuse! But just wanted you to understand why I might mess up.”
“I appreciate you sharing that with me, Bud,” Tony said, smiling softly. “And while we’re on the subject, is there anything you would prefer I did or didn’t call you?”
“Do I have to tell you why?” Peter asked, looking up through his lashes.
“Of course not. We’re setting boundaries here, and boundaries don’t require an explanation. Not unless you decide you want to give one.”
“Well, there’s this one nickname,” Peter whispered. “You’ve never used it! But since you asked, I, uh- I don’t like to be called Einstein. Like, at all.”
Tony was a little confused but flourished his hand in acceptance all the same. “Done, deal, Kiddo” he quipped. “I can handle that. Anything else?”
Peter promptly shook his head.
“Great. You let me know if that changes, though. Alright, Kiddo?” Tony requested, hoping to keep the door open for future conversations. To his relief, Peter agreed. “Perfect,” he said, his words accompanied by a genuine smile. “should we get back to those suit upgrades?”
Peter smiled between Tony and the workspace, replying, “Yeah, Tony. We definitely should.”