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When Azul hears Jade’s theory of Jamil actually caring about Kalim for the first time, he blows up in a fit of laughter.
“Please, there’s no way Jamil actually cares about Asim! He tried to overthrow him, throw him out of the school, and then, when all of his plans failed, kill him in a berserk rage of Overblot. There’s no way he cares about him!”
The twins share a look and try very hard not to smile like sharks that smelled blood of their future prey. Which is why Floyd stops himself from pointing out that Azul himself tried to kill them both, and everyone in the immediate vicinity, during his own Overblot-induced rage before he completely broke down on them.
If Jade is right (and most often he is), then they will need to play a long con. Carefully not getting in the middle of Azul’s little speeches, while trying to get the evidence that their Housewarden is wrong and present them to him on a silver platter.
Jade nods at Floyd, who very carefully, as not to alert Azul, takes out his phone and starts recording the rambling of their victi—friend.
They will squeeze every single drop of denial out of Azul for future blackmail material and free entertainment. It will be so humiliating and embarrassing for their Housewarden to be wrong in this particular case.
They cannot wait for when they will be able to cash in that blackmail.
“He probably just bides his time before trying again. Lull Asim into a false sense of security before striking again, but this time flawlessly. Ah, if only he didn’t discard my kind offer of joining Octavinelle, then he would finally get to experience what an equal partnership should be like.”
How would Azul convince Jamil to partner up with him when Viper seems to despise his very existence is beyond Jade, but he says nothing. After all, the deeper a grave he digs, the more free entertainment he and Floyd will get out of the whole situation.
“And the only concern he might have for Asim will only be because of his job. He is getting paid for worrying about him, so it’s only natural he acts concerned.”
After the meltdown Jamil had that Floyd witnessed after the basketball practice when Kalim had an unfortunate incident with falling down the stairs that apparently involved a pack of chewing gum, two hedgehogs, one Heartslabyul student and three rolls of multicolored ribbons, Floyd would beg to differ.
But since Floyd doesn’t beg for anything, he just exchanges another look with Jade and keeps silent.
Kalim was fine of course. It seems that he managed to cast Oasis Maker in the last possible second, barely in time to avoid any major injuries to himself and prevented more potential casualties. Quite fortunate, since the incident happened after the last lesson of the day ended and each student that was finally released from their misery of late classes was on their way to the mirror chamber.
Floyd has never seen Jamil sprint nearly as fast as when he realized something was wrong when there was a sudden scream over the facetime with Kalim, panic and concern, and anxiety clearly painted on his face.
“Poor Jamil, having to work for an idiot with poor marks must be grating on him immensely.”
Azul conveniently forgets Kalim has the best marks in math and music out of the entire school. And it’s not even like Kalim has really poor marks in the rest of the subjects, he’s just painfully average in everything he didn’t encounter before in his educational path. He also struggles with things that other people regard as common knowledge, but that’s to be expected when you were raised as the heir to one of the most powerful families in one’s country.
For Jade it always seems more like an instance of having a specialized individual education rather than any actual stupidity. Kalim is expected to lead the family business at some point after all.
“Maybe one day he’ll realize that the freedom he so craves he can find at my side.”
“Do you think he might have a slight crush on Sea Snake?” Floyd whispers very softly to Jade so their voices won’t get recorded, while their Housewarden rambles away.
“That is a possibility.” Jade responds just as quietly, “Azul seems to be attracted to competency.”
“Then how come he’s not in love with Goldfish already?”
“Probably because Riddle sometimes behaves like a wet kitten, and except for that brief spiral into madness, Jamil has yet to prove to him he’s anything more than a scheming little shit.”
“So you think if he sees Sea Snake breakdown all over Sea Otter he might get a grip?”
“I don’t think it will be that easy, Floyd.”
The next day, Azul and Floyd have their first lessons in roughly the same area, so like every week, they’re walking together to their destination.
Jamil, the unfortunate victim of being in the same class as Azul, is already standing close to the classroom with his earphones on and scrolling on his phone.
Viper looks up, as if sensing Azul staring at him, and grimaces before pretending he did not notice him at all.
“Jamil!”
“No.”
“You don’t even know what I was about to say. You really shouldn’t shoot people down like that.”
“I don’t care. I don’t want anything to do with you.”
“My, my, so cold! How about we start from the beginning then? I’d like to invite you for tea and some cake tomorrow to Monstro Lounge. Unless you have other preferences?”
Before Jamil can respond in any way, shape or form, his phone rings. The teen quickly sweeps his finger on the phone, and a familiar face shows up.
“Hey, Jamil!”
Floyd very carefully observes Viper’s face, and it seems it has softened a bit when he opened the facetime with Kalim. Or, at the very least, his frown is not as severe as it was when he was looking at Azul.
“Kalim. You got to your first lesson alright?”
“Uh huh, everything is fine. I’m waiting with Silver for our first class, see?” Kalim moves his phone to show a barely awake teen at his side. Silver yawns and waves lazily at Jamil before he closes his eyes again. “Oh! And we got an invitation from Riddle!”
“We did? For what?”
“Unbirthday party, tomorrow in the afternoon in Heartslabyul gardens. Riddle will send me a more concrete hour later, something about figuring out a timetable first. I asked if I could bring you, and he agreed. Do you wanna come with me?” Kalim’s smile could melt the hardest of diamonds.
On the other hand, the smile Jamil sends to Azul is downright mean when he responds to Kalim.
“Sure I do. Wait, what should we bring then? A cake?”
“Riddle said we don’t need to worry about that, since they provide all snacks, but we still should bring some sort of a gift. I’ll ask Trey to give me a pdf version of their rulebook to figure it out, we don’t want to accidentally offend them if we bring some flowers and they turn out to be wildly inappropriate, after all.”
“Why in the rulebook?”
“Honestly? They have like, 1500 rules and I’d be surprised if they have nothing about appropriate gifts for parties.”
Jamil nods slowly, the gears in his head almost visibly moving while he’s thinking.
“And I’m pretty sure I’ve seen something of sorts when I was reading through my physical copy, but it would take forever to find it again.”
Floyd peeks over Jamil’s shoulder.
“Why do you have a Heartslabyul rulebook, Sea Otter?”
“Hi, Floyd! Why wouldn’t I have it?”
Well, that is as good an explanation as any. But Floyd is curious now and needs a more detailed answer than that.
“People usually don’t bother with learning or reading through things that they don’t need to. Or want to. I certainly wouldn’t.”
“Yeah, I guess. But when I heard that Heartslabyul has their own rulebook, I wanted to see what it was about for future reference if I ever need it.”
“Did you need it?”
“Eh, maybe twice or thrice, during Housewarden meetings when we needed to sell Riddle on some idea or other. Worked like a charm.”
Before Kalim can add anything more, there’s a loud ringing noise traveling all over the school.
“Oh! Start of classes. We’ll talk more later, Jamil!”
“Yeah, see you.”
Viper ends the call, and he smiles sharply at Azul while fixing up his blouse.
“As you could hear, I have plans tomorrow. I’d say take care, but I don’t really care if you drop dead five minutes from now or not.”
And with that, Jamil disappears into the crowd of students without a further ado.
“There is no way Jamil accepted Riddle’s invitation out of his own will.”
“Azul~, he was going to reject your invitation.”
“You don’t know that. And now you need to run if you don’t want to be late for your classes.”
Floyd couldn’t give a flying fuck about being on time or not, but he knows a lost battle against Azul when he sees one. Or rather, a battle against Azul’s stubbornness, so he just does what he was told to.
At least this time.
~*~
If Jade and Floyd weren’t closely observing the Scarabia duo, they probably wouldn’t have noticed subtle shifts in their dynamics throughout the months.
They’ve become even more attached to a hip than they were before, if it’s even possible. They also started teasing each other more openly, if Jamil’s shouts of utter betrayal and Kalim’s snickering, almost cackling during breaks between lessons are anything to go by.
Azul, somehow, stays blind to the obvious show of friendship between the teens, still spewing nonsense how Jamil is just biding his time, getting even closer to Kalim before putting a dagger through the heir’s heart. Metaphorically, of course.
“He’s probably doing all of this to dry Asim as dry as he can before throwing him out. That’s what I would’ve done in his place, after all, squeezing all thaumarks and favors I possibly can before abandoning the sucker.”
Jade just wonders what possible benefits Jamil would get out of being so close to Kalim now. It’s not even like Jamil needs money, if his donation to Ramshackle is anything to go by. Besides, didn’t he try to distance himself from him through that half-brained attempt of his during the winter break? One would think he would’ve done the exact opposite than getting even more attached to Kalim.
The atmosphere between the two teens is lighter now too, and Jade suspects they have figured out the new dynamics that fit them just fine.
Meanwhile, Floyd is just impressed with the absolute mean strike Kalim seems to possess whenever he’s teasing someone and doesn’t feel the need to be careful with the teased person’s feelings. He can be absolutely merciless, and those super confident, almost evil looking smiles are something else whatsoever. Nobody expected that. It’s an amazing free entertainment too, because Jamil’s reactions to Kalim’s teasing or admitting to doing some things just to push his servant’s buttons are entertaining as hell.
It also highlights that Kalim usually just chooses to be nice to everyone, the exact opposite of the popular opinion that Asim doesn’t have a mean bone in his body, which is enlightening.
“It seems that Asim is falling for it too, if the way he’s constantly fluttering around Jamil is anything to go by,” Azul continues, completely absorbed in his small speech.
The edit of Azul’s takes will be glorious if Floyd feels like mashing it together at some point, Leech thinks, maybe he should show it to Jamil at some point too. Seeing the righteous anger on the snake’s face will be so much fun!
“Maybe you should just leave them alone, Azul,” says Jade, pretending to be a concerned friend, “Jamil has rejected each and every one of your invitations and propositions, and I don’t think Jamil is going to have a sudden change of heart and accept.”
“Or, I’ve yet to propose something he cannot possibly decline. And he rejected half of the invitations solely because he had plans already.”
“Like hanging out with Sea Otter.”
“Or, a party with Kalim that he suddenly remembered they have.”
“Or, he had a basketball club meeting.”
“Or, he agreed to help Sea Otter with something or other.”
“He just keeps inventing new excuses just so you won’t come and hunt him down to hang out with you, Azul. Maybe it’s time to give up and move to more oxygenated waters?”
But Azul is already shaking his head, looking equal parts frustrated, pitiful and benevolent, as if Jamil is his beloved pet that’s just misbehaving instead of being a venomous snake just waiting for an opportunity to strike the idiot who keeps bothering him with a stick.
“I’m sure he’s not inventing excuses, he’s just busy. Kalim is working him down to the bone, isn’t he? Poor guy, he just can’t catch a break.”
Jade and Floyd glance at each other and raise their brows.
They didn’t think Azul would be going this hard in his denial. He really seems to want Jamil to resemble himself just because he has seen something of a ‘poor bullied boy’ in Viper, when their circumstances are nothing similar. Azul seems to think that Jamil is just misguided, and if he only gave Azul the chance, he would’ve opened his eyes to the possibility of having an ‘equal’ partnership, when in reality there would be nothing equal in it, not the way Azul envisions himself at least.
And Jamil seems to realize that, hence shooting down any and all invitations. And Jamil just seems to despise people who are, for him at least, visibly suspicious. Which is probably why he seems to consider Jade a shady person unworthy of even association.
Jamil is also a protective person to those he considers under his care, which in turn explains why he tries really hard to keep Kalim as far away from the Octavinelle trio as he possibly can without outright forbidding him. Not like Kalim takes his warnings for what they are and does whatever he wants, anyway.
Actually, Jade and Kalim are slotted to have their weekly tea on Sunday. The heir is supposed to bring a new blend he wanted Jade to try out, which only shows how hard Jamil failed in his endeavor.
To be perfectly honest though, Viper isn’t entirely wrong in being cautious of Jade, however, Jade isn’t dangerous to Kalim. For both Jade’s and Kalim’s sake.
In any case, Jamil wants nothing to do with them, and the only person he finds even slightly tolerable in their little pack of friends is Floyd of all people. Jade loves his twin, he really does, but there’s a good reason why people find Jade more tolerable than his beloved brother.
The twins frown at each other.
They will need some hard evidence for Azul to finally shut up about Jamil and just give up trying to have a business relationship with someone who clearly doesn’t want it.
Not to be confused with being in denial, like what Jamil is—was practicing for a few weeks after his Overblot. That’s different.
Jade sighs and focuses back on Azul’s rant.
This is going to be a long evening.
~*~
The life goes on.
But Azul’s denial and willful blindness refuses to leave him, which actually got really old really fast. It got to the point that it became unbearable to listen to their friend talking about Jamil and Kalim. After all, there’s only so much delusion a guy can take before it gets tiresome, and you just wanna squeeze the brains out of the offender, because clearly they don’t need it.
Especially after both Jade and Azul have caught Kalim and Jamil holding hands when they thought nobody sees them.
A clear sign, one would say. Not for Azul though, oh no.
“Jamil probably seduced Kalim for—” Floyd didn’t even bother to listen to the rest of the rant. It’s like Azul’s intentionally obtuse.
Which is why now Floyd walks down the hallway towards the mirror chamber like a man on a mission.
And what a mission it was.
Self-assigned, of course. He needs to catch a certain Sea Snake, and show him one small video, and hopefully get some evidence that yes, Jamil cares about Kalim, and no, he doesn’t do it for money, and he’s not waiting for a good moment to cast his Housewarden away like unwanted trash.
He lands gracefully in Scarabia, which is bustling with students that have finished their classes for the day. One group quickly notices Floyd’s entrance, and after a quick argument, one of them comes closer to Leech.
“Do you need something, senpai?”
Floyd is in a fairly good mood. He decides to be nice to the teen. Just this time though.
“Ah~, I’m looking for Sea Snake. Is he here?”
“Vice Housewarden? He should be in his room right now, second door on the left if you go down there.”
“Thanks, baby fish.”
Floyd hears the confusion in the student’s voice when he passes the guy.
“Baby fish?”
He makes his way to the room, and deciding he feels rather generous today (must be because of all this heat in Scarabia dorms), he knocks.
“Come in!”
So Floyd does.
Jamil is sitting at his desk in front of a laptop watching something on Magicam. It seems like some cooking video.
Viper looks up, and his eyebrows raise.
“Floyd? What do you want?”
“Sea Snakey~! Can’t I just visit you?”
“You don’t do visits,” Jamil’s voice is dryer than the desert Floyd can see outside the window.
“Aw, true enough. Say, is Sea Otter here?”
“What do you need Kalim for?”
“Eh, it’s less a need than a want, but since I don’t have all that much time to laze around here, you’ll need to suffice.”
“Suffice for what.”
“For watching a video I’ve made, obviously!”
“The fuck? But why do you need me to see it, couldn’t you ask Jade to do it for you? Or even Azul?”
“Nah, it needs to be you, you’ll realize why soon enough.”
Jamil takes the offered phone from Floyd reluctantly, but clearly intrigued, and hits the play button.
And he watches.
And watches.
And very carefully gives Floyd his phone back, then asks with false calmness:
“For how long Ashengrotto has been trying to psychoanalyze me? Unsuccessfully, may I add?”
“A while now~, but it has gotten unbearable since you and Sea Otter started dating, I need him to stop already. It seems he just can’t move on from there and talks something about you seducing Sea Otter for some reason or other.”
Jamil’s face becomes as red as a lobster fresh out of boiling water.
“How do you know about that?!”
“You two weren’t exactly subtle after our last match, you know.”
If possible, Jamil becomes even redder before he puts the hood over his head.
“I knew it was a bad idea to make out in the back. Wait, did Azul see us?!”
“Nope, just me. He just saw you holding hands once.”
“Oh, thank God for small mercies, I guess.”
“So please, do something to get through his head that you like Sea Otter so he can finally shut up about it!”
“And how do you propose I would do it? I don’t want to talk with him about anything, least of all about me dating Kalim. And why is his insanity suddenly my responsibility?”
“He might leave you alone if you convince him to.”
Jamil snorts.
“He can’t take a goddamn hint whether I refuse him outright or make up excuses so I cannot possibly take his invitation, why do you think I can do anything in this situation? What am I to do, make out with Kalim in front of him?”
“I dunno, you’re supposed to be the smart one.”
“Ugh.”
Well, at least Floyd has tried to make his life easier. Though Jamil just might come up with some idea, now that the problem is apparent to him, if only so he can prove Azul wrong.
Sea Snake takes a special pleasure in correcting people in their assumptions.
Besides, being able to complain about the Azul situation to someone who isn’t Jade feels refreshing. He loves his brother, he really does, but there’s only so often they can bitch together over the same subject, when they both know their opinions and arguments by heart by now.
~*~
“There… is one way that may convince Azul to finally get a grip,” Jamil says to Floyd after the basketball practice.
They’re still in changing rooms, and before the practice has ended Viper asked Floyd to stay behind for a bit, and while Floyd isn’t a curious person by nature, he definitely is interested why someone who’s as antisocial as Jamil wants to talk with him.
And it seems like he wants to put Azul’s dreams and hopes to an eternal rest.
Floyd raises his eyebrows.
“You thought something up, Sea Snake?”
“The idea’s Kalim’s actually. It’s pretty simple, very on brand for him.”
“Oh?”
“So, Jade has this handy-dandy Unique Magic, yeah?”
Floyd can see where this is going.
“He does. You want him to use it on you?”
“Only if he asks just the question as I word it. No more, no less. And Kalim has to be there too.”
“I’ll let Jade know~. But why did you change your mind about doing something about it?”
Jamil groans.
“He keeps asking me out! I’ve had enough of it, and Kalim absolutely doesn’t help, he pretends to be oblivious to my struggle and just says ‘aww, I’m sure Azul just wants to be friends! Maybe you should give him a chance?’ with the biggest shit-eating smile he can produce. It’s awful!”
Floyd whistles, impressed. He didn’t think Kalim had the balls to tease Jamil about that.
“He should be on my side! And he should mind Azul being so forward with me! But no, my boyfriend is the least jealous person you could ever find who trusts me not to cheat on him like that.”
“And it’s a bad thing, why exactly?”
Jamil’s face softens slightly. And is that a gentle smile, that slight crooking of his mouth? The world might be actually ending.
“It’s not. I’m glad he respects and trusts me like that. I just wanted to vent. And seeing how Azul grates on your nerves just as much as on mine recently…”
“Yeah gotcha. When are you and Sea Otter free so that we can shut Azul up once and for all?”
They meet up next Saturday in Monstro Lounge. Kalim seems to be in high spirits as usual, while Jamil looks as if he is walking to his own execution.
“Welcome to Monstro Lounge!” Jade, ever the good host, greets the Scarabia duo, “come, we’ll be doing this in the back. Can’t disturb our guests, after all.”
“Hi, Jade!”
“Let’s just get this over with. Here’s your question, Kalim has memorized it too already, so no funny business.”
“I would never.”
They walk into the cozily furnished room behind the Monstro Lounge with the best view of the vault in the wall.
“Oh, those are the visitors you’ve been telling me about, Floyd? You should’ve told me it's Jamil and Kalim, I would’ve prepared something better than a measly cake.”
“We don’t want your cake Azul, we’re here just to prove a point.”
Jade and Floyd sit down on either side of Azul, while Jamil and Kalim sit on the opposite couch.
Jamil sits very close to Kalim. Jade is sure Azul would find a plausible (only for him though) explanation for it too.
“And what point would that be?”
Jade smiles softly, looking every bit like a perfect gentleman. it doesn’t make him look any less than a mass murderer that just never has been caught, though.
“Please, look into my eyes, Jamil. Shock The Heart.” Jamil’s eyes become slightly glossed over, proof that the spell has worked. Jade wasn’t sure it will, but it seems that if the subject is willing for the spell to work and doesn’t fight it, it will take hold without a problem. “Now, what was the question? Ah, yes. Jamil, do you care for and do you care about Kalim?”
“Of course I do! Despite the… less than ideal plan that I tried to execute during the winter break, I care about Kalim. A lot. And I still care for Kalim, since it’s my job, but I also want to. To some degree.”
The spell ends, and Azul looks contemplative.
Floyd is hopeful. Does this mean the end of Azul’s speeches, TED Talks and essays about how Jamil just ‘doesn’t know better’, and ‘if he were to take my invitations, we would’ve been glorious’?
“I didn’t know someone could fool your Signature Spell like that, Jade. Have you?”
Jamil looks pissed. He gets up and grabs Azul’s shirt to shake him.
“I SPILL ALL THIS INFO ON YOU UNDER THE VERIFIED TRUTH SPELL AND YOU STILL CAN’T BELIEVE IT?”
Floyd grabs the back of Jamil’s blouse and forcefully pulls him away from Azul before he beats the shit out of him.
Kalim looks at Jade and shrugs.
“Well, at least we tried.”
“That we did. Are we still up for tomorrow’s tea?”
“Of course! Oh, I also got a new dessert from back home, already checked for poisons and it’s perfectly safe, you need to try it out.”
“Very well then.”
“DO I NEED TO MAKE YOU REALIZE, HUH? I’LL SNAKE WHISPER YOUR ASS INTO THE NEXT WEEK!”
“And that’s my cue to retreat. Take care, Jade!”
Jade smiles at him gently.
“See you tomorrow, Kalim.”
The heir comes closer to Jamil, who’s still held by Floyd, and walks straight into his field of vision before kissing him straight into the mouth. Jamil immediately deflates, almost melting under Kalim’s mouth.
“Let's go back to our dorms, Jamil! It’s almost time for the dorm movie night we decided to hold.”
“Y-yeah, okay.”
Kalim grabs Jamil’s hand and drags him away.
A silence befall on the Octavinelle trio.
“Uh. Maybe I am wrong?”
Floyd facepalms, and Jade just sighs. Azul just isn’t giving up, is he?