Chapter Text
Mun Yeong had woken up in the hospital, the specifics surrounding her at the time had already been forgotten. All she knew was that she was in a car accident and it did some damage, more then she would have expected. After she woke up, Mun Yeong vaguely remembered that there were a lot of people asking her a lot of questions, making tests and fussing about her condition. Not that she recalled any of the details, it was all a blur. What she did remember however, was the reaction to the question of what year it was.
“Early 2020, the specific month is lost on me but definitely around January or February.”
The doctor furrowed his eyes, scribbled something on the board and continued with his questioning. “What’s the last thing you remember doing Miss Ko?”
Mun Yeong had to think, quiet for a long time. What was she doing before that damn car had hit her? What was the last thing she remembered? Bickering with Mr. Lee was always a safe option. Her gaze slid into the corner where the man in question was standing, his eyes blood shot and full of concern for her. His eyes kept on glancing to the window, someone must be standing there but Mun Yeong’s view was blocked and she could never see who he was looking at.
“Don’t worry, take your time with using your brain. It’s difficult to get into the rhythm of thinking again after something like that, I know it might sound weird but you’ll get the hang of it again.” The doctor told her gently and her eyes found him again.
In truth, Mun Yeong was frustrated and she was scared. Not knowing what had happened to her was making her very nervous. She was a person who liked to be in control and she knew that knowledge and awareness always gave her that control to have the upper hand in any situation. Now however, she drew blanks left and right. She tried again, it must have been something with Mr. Lee, surly, there was no one else she saw as often as him but some how it didn’t feel right. She was missing something; if only she knew what.
“Your mind might have issues with remembering what happened but your body never forgets, if you can’t see it then maybe feel it. your body will tell you what feels right.” Her doctor spoke and Mun Yeong tried not to role her eyes. She didn’t need this strange voodoo crap from this man, she needed him to fix her brain. But she guessed that was exactly what this man was trying to do. Help her assess the full extent of the damage that was done. She let images go through her mind, images of what she knew and tried to feel if one provoked an intense emotion.
Snow, the image of snow in front of her hotel window, the feeling of rain on her cheek, the warmth of the sun on her face.
The sun was shining on her face but the air had been cold enough to puff in front of her and yet Mun Yeong was wearing a short dress. Lee was admonishing her for her lack of care and telling her that he would soon have to take her to the hospital due to pandemonium.
The hospital!
That seemed to stir an intense emotion inside of her but she wasn’t quite sure why.
The air was cold but the sun was shining, January and February felt that way, maybe the beginning of March and April. She liked to read books during that time… her books in particular. A book! She was releasing a new book soon. Sang In had just informed her of a reading in the children’s ward of the hospital.
“Zombie Kid!” Mun Yeong almost shouted happily, “I’m getting ready to release my book called Zombie Kid! Lee just told me about a reading for… for… the boy who fed on nightmares!” saying it out loud gave her a strange feeling, a longing for something, she was missing something but what?
Mun Yeong quickly pushed the thought away and focused on her eureka moment. She looked at Lee, thinking that he would be looking at her with relief but when her eyes met his own, he looked more devastated then anything else. Sang In ripped his gaze away from her own questioning one and to the window, back to whoever he was seeing there. He gave a subtle shake of his head and that action scared her. what was she missing? Why was he being so discouraging and why is her doctor jotting something down with such a serious expression.
It would be a few days until the doctors had told Mun Yeong that it was not in fact 2020, that she had lost the last six years of her memories to this car crash, that they might never come back and she would have to learn how to live with that possibility.
The first time they told her, Mun Yeong thought they had been joking, only after seeing the date on multiple devices; 2026.06.12, did she believe them. the panic attacks that followed were brutal, she hadn’t had them since she was 16 but it felt like no time had passed. Her father was choking her again in her childhood bed, her air pipe closing and her breathing becoming so fast that she needed to be sedated.
They released her a week later and Mun Yeong had moved back into the hotel room she stayed in before the accident, or at least in the room she remembered staying in in 2020. But something was off, she knew this place but her body was restless, no longer comfortable here, obviously used to another place, another home. One she could no longer remember. She forced herself to get used to it again. That was a month ago, since then she had begun work again at Mr. Lee’s publishing house… or now a publishing house that was co owned by him and her apparently. He had shown her some books that she had released after her memory loss and in the beginning she didn’t believe him that those were hers. The writing had changed drastically, the themes more about finding and regaining happiness and love, rather then dealing with trauma head on.
Not only her stories but the art style had changed beyond her recognition. Where there were dark and twisted images, full of stark and intense colours before; now there were soft and gentle pencil strokes. The colours were soothing and the images softer. The first time Mun Yeong read finding the real face she had been so overwhelmed by the strangeness of the story that she turned to Mr. Lee with wide eyes.
“I wrote this? Me? Ko Mun Yeong wrote this piece of literature?”
Sang In had nodded his head encouragingly but her face did not change.
“I mean… it’s good, the story is… almost sweet but are we sure that I have the capacity to write something like this? Me? The woman in black.”
Sang In shrugged and a wistful smile had graced his face. “You changed.” Was all he said.
“Yes… but not that much.”
She had to pause at the front of the book, a picture of her and a man was there. Pointing to it she asked, “who is that?”
“The illustrator, Moon Sang Tae.”
“Why would his picture be in here?” Mun Yeong had never let one of her illustrators add their picture, not that any wanted to. They never had that kind of relationship.
“You wanted it that way.” Sang In was very patient with all her questions, ever since she woke up and asked him everything and anything about her current situation. She would never admit it to him but his presence had helped her a lot in this difficult time. He was something familiar in a world that she could barely recognise.
“Why?” her voice was filled with disdain. The thought of her wanting someone else in her book made her angry. When did she become so soft?
Sang In shrugged again, “You changed.” That seemed to be his favourite thing to say to her. That she had changed without ever going into the detail of how she had changed, and in what god damn way did she change? What had triggered such a drastic personality shift?
Another thing that didn’t make sense to her was the way her heart sped up whenever her assistant was around. He was introduced to her on her first day back, Sang In had explained to her that she had needed an assistant after her books had hit a new peak in popularity. She was about to tell him to send the man to hell, Mun Yeong didn’t do assistants, they were tactless and couldn’t handle her for long but when she saw him… something had happened to her body. Her heart speeding up and her muscles tensing up and relaxing all at once.
Moon Gang Tae, the man with the pretty eyes. She wasn’t sure why she was feeling this way about him, if she would have to guess she might have had an affair with him before the crash but when she saw his wedding ring on his finger she knew that, that was not the case. Mun Yeong might have done a lot of questionable things in her past but sleeping with a married man was never one of them. For no man in the world would she give up that rule, not even for pretty Moon Gang Tae. There was too much scandal and heart break connected to helping a man cheat and she had drawn a clear line around that rule, never crossing it. she might not remember how she had changed but Mun Yeong knew that no matter what, she wouldn’t have done that. She just wouldn’t.
And yet her heart sang when she saw him, her stomach filled with butterflies. There was no doubt about her body recognising him and she quickly realised why she was so fond of him. He seemed to know everything about her, from the way she liked her coffee in the morning to the way she liked to eat and when and what. It felt like he had a direct connection to her stomach and her mind, reading her needs before she even knew them herself. Whenever she was craving a coffee, he would already be walking in with one in his hand. Whenever she would want food he had already made a reservation at her favourite spot.
He would give her food and when she told him she didn’t like this stuff, he had told her that she did and to trust him and for some annoying reason she did. When she tried the “new” food, she always grudgingly admitted that it tasted good. He would laugh, an infuriatingly beautiful sound, and smile at her with all his teeth. Reminding her of just how beautiful he was.
She tried not to think to hard about the way his hand would find itself on her waste in a crowded room, as if it belonged there, guiding her to her next appointment. As if it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do.
Or the way his jaw would tense whenever they would meet an event manager that would flirt with her a bit too much, making too many comments about her appearance and how beautiful she was, or the men at the coffee shops that would try and give her their number. The way he would be mad for the rest of the day, a certain anxiousness filling his eyes after every encounter as if he had a right to be angry at men that approach her. Like he wasn’t married to someone already.
Or the way his eyes would ravage her when he sees her in a dress for an event. When her hair framed her face in just the right way and her make up was minimal yet elegant. The way his eyes followed the curves of her body in a possessive way that he had no right to. The way he would not leave her side for a single second during those nights when she looked like that. Whenever they would bump into someone who asked Mun Yeong how she was doing and if she could remember, her answering being no, the other person would stare at Gang Tae for a long while, pity in their eyes but Mun Yeong never understood why. His hand would find it’s way on her waste again and she would let him guide her away. Mun Yeong was still easily overwhelmed due to her brain injury and people continuously knowing her but she not them made her tired and uncomfortable. Gang Tae felt her decrease in energy so fast that she never had to tell him that she needed a break, he would guide her to a quiet corner and they would stand there for a second. His eyes would be fixed on her face, reading her like a book and sometimes, just sometimes, he would be staring at her lips, like a man dying of thirst.
It gave her doubts about her previously proclaimed lines that she drew with married men. It made her unsure about what the nature of their relationship was and why she couldn’t seem to bring herself to tell him off about his behaviour.
Secretly Mun Yeong enjoyed his jealousy, enjoyed the attention he gave her and it scared her because the Mun Yeong that she knew would never do anything with a married man. Who had she turned into?
They would stay late in the office at least once a week and work on this and that. She had caught him looking at her with an expression that no man had ever looked at her with. His eyes fully focused on her, the emotions inside of them so deep and complex that she couldn’t even start to untangle them. The moment would be broken by his phone ringing, always at around seven or eight o’clock. Probably his wife calling him home, Mun Yeong would muse bitterly. Quickly trying to banish the bitterness at the thought of Gang tae going home to another woman.
He would pick up and soon after pack his bags and leave, assuring the other person on the other end that he was going to be home on time.
“I know, I’m sorry. I sometimes forget the time.” He would say checking his watch, his eyes find her during the call and he nodes at the thing the person on the other side said, “yes… she is with me now. No, I don’t think that’s a good idea, not tonight.” He turned away from her and spoke quietly, “It’s too soon. Now is not the time to do this, no matter what I want.”
Mun Yeong’s eyes furrowed, what was too soon? What did he want? She hated that almost every aspect of her life had become a riddle to her. There was nothing that made sense to her, not fully at least. Not her stories, not her eating habits, not the fact that her body felt different from before; she hadn’t told anyone about it but the way her body had changed in the last six years had her confused. It wasn’t like she didn’t look like she did before, but her breasts had become heavy in a way she didn’t know before and her stomach… had marks, not large ones or many but they were there, fine lines on her lower belly and some on her hips. She couldn’t make out what had caused them. But most importantly she couldn’t figure out what her relationship with Moon Gang Tae was, what the fuck was she doing with this man before that car crash.
He bid her goodnight and Mun Yeong watched him leave, her eyes sceptically following him.
It was Tuesday morning when her heart had almost stopped. She walked into the hallway of the office and had found Moon Gang Tae standing in front of a stroller, holding a baby. The little thing had looked not more then a few months old but what almost nocked Mun Yeong off her feet was the urge to pluck the baby from Gang Tae’s arms and hold it herself. Mun Yeong did not do babies. Not in a million years. The child was asleep in what she assumed was her father’s arms and her heart had almost crashed to the floor. He had a child with someone and Mun Yeong thought they had been having sex before her car crash. There was no way she would sleep with a man that had a baby at home, right? She was so unsure of herself lately that she couldn’t even say it with confidence. It made her feel sick. What was this man playing at?
His eyes had widened when he saw her, standing there frozen in the hallway.
“Mun Yeong… I didn’t know you were in already.” His eyes were flitting over her face, her eyes and the expression inside, searching for something that Mun Yeong couldn’t begin to fathom. Her eyes wouldn’t leave the child however, no matter how hard she tried to look at him or at anything else. The baby looked like him and yet there was something so familiar about her, Mun Yeong tried to grasp what it was but she might as well have tried to get a grip on fog. Whatever it was, her brain chemicals were not cooperating with her on this front. The frustration of trying brought tears to her eyes.
“There are no children allowed at the office, bring her back to her mother or day care, but not here.” She turned on her heel and stormed down the hallway. Gang Tae was calling her back but she couldn’t stand the look in his eyes, when he looked at her with so many emotions whilst holding his child in his arms, a child he had with another woman. The tears spilled out of her eyes before she could get to the woman’s bathroom but she kept her head low in order to hide them. The good thing about the early morning was that there weren’t many people in the office to witness her break down.
She had cried in the bathroom, not really sure why she was crying, definitely not for the stupid man or his stupid child that were outside. No, her tears came from anger, not grief, she was angry that she couldn’t remember who she was, how she had changed and what had happened to her in the last six years that made her into the person that she was.
When she came out of her hiding spot, the baby stroller and the baby had gone and instead of being relieved her heart had cried out in sadness. Shut up! You aren’t allowed to feel sad about some random baby that I don’t know. When she entered her office, Gang Tae had already sat down at his own desk and was typing away. His head snapped up at her appearance and he studied her carefully, looking for something, just like he had before. They stood there, staring at each other for a while before he finally gave up and his eyes had turned from hopeful to impossibly sad. She couldn’t bare that look, not when she was so sad too.
“Are you okay?” Came his question, “I- I’m sorry for bringing her in… she usually stays with someone in the morning but today had been an emergency. I won’t bring her again.” Gang Tae assured and Mun Yeong nodded stiffly, ignoring the displeasure coursing through her at the thought of not seeing that little human again.
She had to take deep breaths to get a hold of her rolling emotions but once she was at her desk and lost herself in her work she was able to forget about Gang Tae’s sad sad eyes.
“Who is Gang Tae’s wife?” Mun Yeong couldn’t help herself, the question slipping from between her lips before she could stop it. She knew it was inappropriate to ask about her co workers personal life, especially when said person was not present but his actions in the past few weeks had been inappropriate as well, he came way too close to her, touched her way too freely to be acceptable in an office. He never spoke about his wife, nor had he brought up his daughter again, it infuriated her. She wanted to know who he was and what he was playing at. Did he have personal problems at home? Did he hate his wife? Why did he know so much about her but she knew nothing about him? It seemed unfair and it made her feel stupid.
Mr. Lee’s shoulders tensed but he tried to cover it up with a stretch of his back. It wasn’t just Gang Tae who was keeping things from her, it had been her old partner as well. There was someone he wasn’t telling her about and something. Mun Yeong had caught him talking on the phone with a person he affectionately called darling. Had he gotten himself a girlfriend? If yes, why not tell her about it? Why was everyone keeping things from her as if she couldn’t handle the smallest piece of information. It rubbed her the wrong way, they were all part of a big conspiracy and didn’t want her to know about any of it. Even though she didn’t like admitting it but their actions made her feel alone. Mun Yeong might not have known Gang Tae, but Lee? He was supposed to be the closest thing she had to a family member and when he kept things from her… it hurt.
“Mun Yeongie you know you shouldn’t ask such questions about your co workers.” He tried to make his voice light but Mun Yeong could hear the strain underneath.
“Okay… then who are you seeing? And don’t pretend that you don’t know who I’m talking about.” Mun Yeong raised her eyebrow at him expectantly. If she couldn’t get information about Gang Tae, then she would try to figure out who Mr. Lee had turned into in the last six years.
“I-“ he hesitated and when he turned around his eyes were pleading with her to understand. It’s an expression she had come to hate. It always meant that he wouldn’t be telling her shit that she wanted to know and usually told her that he wasn’t sure she was ready for anything yet. As if she had summoned the response herself he spoke, “I don’t think this is the right time to talk about this.”
Before she could even get a hold of her frustration, Mun Yeong’s eyes had filled with tears. “That’s all you ever say! It’s not the right time, you aren’t ready, when am I ready? You heard the doctor, I might never remember who I was in those six years, my memories might be gone forever!”
“Don’t say that!” Sang In’s voice as almost panicky at the thought.
“It feels like all you do is wait for me to remember, to wake up one day and just know what happened. It’s been two months, let’s be real, I probably won’t remember anything if I haven’t remembered it by now.” Her tears were running down her face now, streaming down her cheeks and neck.
Sang In’s gesture was defensive, hands timidly trying to calm her down. “I know this is very difficult for you. I understand that.”
“No you don’t, you’ve never had six years of your life taken away in a span of a night.”
He ignored her interruption and continued, “But this is difficult for us too! We don’t know how to handle you asking us things, we don’t know how to answer your questions. There is so much I want to say but answering your questions will only spawn more of them and that might lead to information that you are not ready to hear.”
Sang In took a step closer to her but Mun Yeong moved a step back. Somewhere in her mind Mun Yeong knew that she wasn’t being fully fair but she wasn’t about to be reasonable. It’s been two months of her not knowing who she was and what was going on. She had enough of everyone’s excuses.
“Who is we?”
His eyes widened in realisation; probably saying too much to her. Before he could even come up with a thing to say or an excuse to not answer her question the door to his office opened and Gang Tae walked in. Right now he was the last person Mun Yeong wanted to see, she didn’t know what her relationship with this man was or how to even begin that conversation. She was too uncertain about him to let him watch her cry but the angle that he came in made it difficult for her to hide her emotional outbreak. His face had gone from relaxed to serious at seeing her tears and on instinct his hands had shot up trying to pull her closer to him. But she was done with letting him touch her in such a way and not knowing who he was to her, she had enough.
Shaking his hands off of her, Mun Yeong moved away from him. “Don’t touch me!” his reaction was instant, freezing on the spot and then realising what he was about to do he pulled his hands back hastily but not without hesitation. His hands still flexing at his side in a way that told her that he still wanted to reach for her.
Before he could open his mouth she was out the door, hurrying back to her own office and closing the door tightly behind her. she really needed to get her emotions under control, her mental breakdowns were getting out of hand.
It had taken her a few minutes to calm down, her hands no longer shaking with anger and frustration. No one ever said how difficult it was to deal with the feelings of frustration that came with not remembering your own life.
A nock on her door gave her thoughts a pause and she could already tell who it was. The quick yet gentle sound was distinct to Gang Tae’s nocking technique so it wasn’t a surprise that the next voice she heard was the man she had expected. “Mun Yeong, can I come in?”
She wasn’t certain if he could; if she wanted him to see her like this. There was such a mystery surrounding him and her, Mun Yeong doubted that she would ever get the answers to the questions she had and there were so many questions. Why did it seem like him and Mr. Lee were on the same level when it came to hierarchy? Nobody treated Gang tae like he was her assistant, not a single employee. If anything, they spoke with a lot of respect when they were in conversation with him, respect that someone in his position might deserve but definitely did not always get. How come she saw him walk into an office further down from the same corridor her office was located at? Who was there and why was her assistant running errands for someone else? The essence of her questions when it came to Moon Gang Tae was simple, who was this man? And why was he lying to her?
The door handle slowly moved downwards until a click could be heard and Gang Tae’s head peaked through the small gap that he had created by pulling the door outwards. His eyes were hesitant. Mun Yeong had noticed quickly that she had a strange obsession with his eyes and the expression he tried to hide in them. Sometimes there was a wall that he put up, a valiant effort to keep her out of his head but it never seemed to work the way he wanted it to, Mun Yeong could still read him like a book. Right now it was a bit more difficult however, his eyes going through many emotions all at once. Most of whom Mun Yeong could not properly decipher.
“Are you alright?” his voice was quiet and Mun Yeong could feel the frustration she felt towards this entire situation give away into exhaustion. It was normal to feel tired quickly, especially after such an outbreak. Her body had been through a lot and her brain was still sluggish when it came to processing and exerting emotions and the chemicals they needed to be picked up by the rest of her body. Gang Tae must have seen the tiredness that washed over her face because he moved closer to her, closing the door behind himself. She leaned against her desk and Gang Tae came next to her, mimicking the move.
“I know this must be very… hard.” His voice almost broke on the last word but Mun Yeong couldn’t stand having this kind of discussion right now, so before he could continue she held up one hand to stop him.
“Please, not right now.”
He looked at her for a while but nodded his head. “Alright.” His hand had found its way next to hers on the desk, their pinkies brushing against each other before his hand completely moved over her own, rubbing gentle circles on the back of it. She let it happen, just this once.
It had been a long day, the sun had set an hour ago and it was almost seven in the evening when their last meeting ended. Since Mun Yeong was co-CEO her role within the company had changed somewhat and she needed to do much more logistic work. But work was good, logistics was good because it kept her from being alone in a hotel room thinking about her handsome assistant she may or may not have had an affair with even though he had a wife and a child at home. Somehow Gang Tae was always there however, in her mind but also physically with her. After the incident with Mr. Lee, he had barely left her alone for even a second. She wondered if Lee told him to stay on her trail and make sure she doesn’t ask people questions that would be, quote on quote “too much” for her.
She was typing away at her computer, sending out the last emails that she hadn’t answered yet. Gang Tae was busying himself with some papers, jaw clenched and brows set in a frown. He was stressed about something, maybe there were some problems at home, or his wife finally figured out that he was having a relationship with his boss that wasn’t so work friendly.
“I can hear your teeth crunch from over here, what is bothering you so much?” Mun Yeong, not always the subtlest person, called over to him. His head moved up from the papers and met her own. Like every time when he looked at her, Mun Yeong felt a spark of electricity run through her body. Gang Tae’s eyes were always filled with so much longing, for what Mun Yeong wasn’t sure but she somehow felt like she could give him what he was searching. A dangerous thought to be sure and one that was off limits.
Walking over to her, he spoke, “Today was just a long day is all.” His proximity made her rise out of her chair and stand as well. It was easier to talk to him that way and if she was closer to his face and thus eyes and lips Mun Yeong took that as a happy coincidence.
Lifting one of her eyebrows she decided to lighten the mood a bit. “This has nothing to do with the whole ordeal that happened at lunch time?” Mun Yeong had wanted to tell Gang Tae that she was getting food but he wasn’t around, at the photocopier or maybe having a secret meeting with Mr. Lee about her wellbeing. So Mun Yeong decided to go on her own and get a sandwich. As she was standing in line a man had started to chat her up and he had made some funny jokes that made Mun Yeong crack a chuckle, something that not many men could accomplish. He had flirted with her and it felt good to flirt with a man that wasn’t ambiguous and had a wedding ring on his finger, so when he pulled out his number she decided to accept it. When Mun Yeong turned around to leave her eyes met those of Gang Tae, his mask went up quickly but even then he couldn’t hide the pain in them. they stared at each other for a while, Mun Yeong feeling like a deer in headlights, her heart was pounding so fast but she wasn’t quite sure why. She was a unattached woman, he was a married man, why did it feel like she was the bad guy here?
They had ignored the incident for the rest of the day but his demeanour never relaxed again and since Mun Yeong does not shy away from confrontation, she decided to bring it up now. Gang Tae’s mask slipped again and his eyes filled with fury before he tried to make them seem indifferent.
“No,” he spoke with a false lightness to his words. “Who you talk to during lunch is none of my business.”
She moved in closer to him, he did not take a step back, other people might have put distance between them but not Gang Tae. He craved her closeness, or so it seemed. Looking up at him they were close enough to share a breath, “So why did it look like you wanted to punch the guy?”
His eyes had flitted down to Mun Yeong’s lips and she knew she had him where she wanted. Vulnerable and ready to answer some fucking questions. But it seemed that she wasn’t immune to the lack of space between them either because all of a sudden she was looking at his lips as well. Inhaling his scent, something that seemed so familiar.
Mun Yeong’s eyes opened reluctantly, the sun shining into the bedroom. She groaned and buried her face in the bed sheets that smelled so much like him. a soft chuckle coming from her right, the touch of a hand on her bare shoulder.
Her heart was racing again, but not due to their proximity and more due to this strange memory that felt like a distant dream. An image of a life time she had forgotten. It was only then that she noticed how close their lips were from touching each other and Mun Yeong pulled away slightly. Her eyes no longer full of soft promises but hard and confused.
“Does your wife know about us?”
Gang Tae blinked in confusion, his eyes widening. “What?”
Mun Yeong was done with their games, “your wife? Does she know we were having an affair and don’t lie to me about it not being true! I have eyes, I see the way you look at me.”
She expected a lot of things from gang Tae but the bitter laugh that came out of his mouth was not the reaction she was expecting from him. Especially after she accused him of cheating.
“I don’t think my wife would mind munch if we kissed right now.”
What kind of answer was that? His home life must be a wreck.
“I’m not asking if she would mind, I’m asking if she knows.”
His cheeks puffed out and he let out a long breath, “that’s a difficult question to answer, almost paradoxical. Let’s say, she isn’t really in the right condition to know about us…” he let out a small chuckle and Mun Yeong only became more confused.
What was he talking about, either someone knew that their husband was having an affair or they didn’t, what condition did one have to be in to comprehend that? A nagging feeling settled in Mun Yeong’s stomach and the searching look in gang Tae’s eyes was only fuelling her on. Before she could think properly on it, Gang Tae’s phone went off.
“Not now.” He whispered as he went to take it. “Hello?” a deep sigh escaped him and he rubbed a hand over his face. All of a sudden he looked bone deep tired, like he hadn’t slept in months and Mun Yeong felt the urge to rub her hand over his back soothingly. “Yeah… okay, I’ll come home now… I know, it’s just… Yeah bye.” He hung up and grabbed his coat in a hurry.
“I have to go home, I’m sorry.” He looked at her but Mun Yeong had no idea what he saw on her face. She could barely get over the feeling she had. It might be for the best if he left for now, it was becoming too much. “See you tomorrow.” With that he left. The door closing behind him with a sure click.
Mun Yeong sat down again, all of a sudden exhausted but the nagging feeling in her mind wouldn’t let her rest.
Not in the right condition… what does that entail?
Her body wanted to do something, she knew. The doctor had told her that the body never forgets. The mind is fragile but muscle memory will never be erased. If she had an urge to do something on instinct, then she should let her body do it. Getting back up from her chair, her heart racing, she went to her door. Stepping out into the hallway she looked right first, in the direction of the exit but that didn’t give the emotional reaction that seemed right. So she turned left, looking down the corridor where the office that Gang Tae had come out once was. She never walked down the corridor, only stopping at her office, having no reason to go further but her body seemed to remember the way there.
There was a clear destination in her mind now. The closer the door came to her, the more her heart raced. Feeling the cold metal of the door handle did nothing to calm her mind and body down. with a soft click she opened the door and entered the foreign office space. It looked like her own, the layout almost identical, a bid desk by the wall that was made up of huge windows, looking over the rest of the room.
But Mun Yeong’s eyes were glued to the name that was on the desk, CFO Moon Gang Tae, how was her assistant also the CFO of their company? What kind of sense did that make? None. Nothing made sense anymore. Her body told her that this was not the first time she was in this room; it wasn’t her first time seeing this desk or the name tag. It felt like her heart was beating out of her chest at this point.
She slowly walked around the desk, already dreading what she would see there, already knowing.
Office documents and the computer all neatly resting on the desk, it seemed that they were untouched, or had been for a while. The chair was pushed in and the scent of Gang Tae hovered over this place, he spent a lot of time in his office… his actual office.
It can’t be…
The picture was her undoing, the one that stood right next to his computer. The one that made her want to look away and run out the office, out the building and into her hotel room and forget this night had ever happened. How one small picture could elicit such a strong reaction from someone was beyond her but the panic that filled her was monumental.
No.
The image showed her, laughing, looking at the baby that Gang Tae had held. The baby reaching out to her, like a child would do to someone it loved. Gang Tae was holding the baby laughing too, looking at her with so much love that it made her feel uncomfortable. She wasn’t used to this kind of affection, or at least she doesn’t remember ever having gotten used to it.
How was this possible?
she isn’t really in the right condition to know about us
His angry looks at every man that approached her.
The stretch marks on her stomach, subtle but yet there.
The wedding ring.
The way he made her heart skip a beat every time.
The way he knew so much about her.
Mun Yeong’s eyes filled with new tears, a sob escaping her throat, deep and ugly.
How could she forget her husband?
How could she forget her own child?