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Nekomaru swings open the door of the hotel room he and Akane would be sharing for the night. As he stares into the darkness, he thinks about how she had just dominated the opposition in an overseas gymnastics tournament. Nekomaru can't say he's surprised. He knows Akane better than anyone and understands what she is truly capable of as he trains with her every day. However, under the bright lights of the gymnasium, she practically became a different person on the mat, her talents blooming for all to see. The rest of her competition had hardly stood a chance, making him feel almost a little bad for them. Although considering Akane’s fame, they knew what was going to happen from the beginning.
He flicks the light switch on the wall before stepping into the room, Akane right behind him. The, honestly too bright, lights illuminate both the objects and the people within its premises. The walls are off-white in color, with wallpaper borders at the top and bottom. The main feature of the room is a tall window that looks out onto the dazzling cityscape. A large mirror hangs from a hook on the closet door, reflecting their images as they stand at the door. Two queen-sized beds rest against one wall and face an armoire that contains a television set and more drawers than Nekomaru can count. The beige carpet is littered with carrier bags that hold their overnight necessities. Once they have stepped into the room, Nekomaru closes the door behind them, shutting it as quietly as possible so as not to disturb the other residents of the hotel. That is if they haven't already as they weren't exactly soundless as they walked through the halls on the way to their room.
Akane walks over to the window and opens the curtains before turning around to face Nekomaru again, who is watching her carefully. Her hair falls in waves about her shoulders as she adjusts it gently, keeping a hand on the back of her neck as she does so. Her eyes seem to shimmer like emeralds when they catch the light. She is wearing a red leotard, which makes her beautiful eyes stand out even more and adds a splash of color to her skin, and a white pair of leggings. It really isn't hard to see why Nekomaru wants her so badly. That's the reason the rest of their class talk behind their backs, waiting for the day he confesses his feelings. They see the way he looks at her and recognize how much he longs for her but they also know how unlikely it is for him to make a move on her anytime soon if at all. After all, it would only ruin everything he has worked for up until this point and then some. Their friendship is the most important thing to him. No matter how desperately he wants her, if it means sacrificing their friendship, he'll never ask for more than they have right now. He is her friend first and foremost and as long as he is allowed to stay by her side, he doesn't need anything else, and maybe that's enough.
She smiles at him again before speaking. "What are you looking at?"
"You,” he states truthfully.
She shakes her head lightly as if to clear her thoughts and focuses her attention on the man standing in front of her. He smiles at her and she can't help but return it in full. His smile is contagious and she finds herself smiling every time he does, no matter how silly or gruff his smile is. He has always been mesmerized by her beauty, ever since they met, and today is no different. Even though he has known her for years now, his feelings have only recently intensified and he finds himself wanting more and more every day. So far he has done nothing more than sit back and watch her live her life the way she wants, something he’s content with. Being with her is nothing like he's ever felt before. He constantly wants to be close to her. To hold her. To hear her laugh and fall asleep next to her. To wake up in the morning and find her there beside him waiting for him to awaken from his dreams.
His heart races and his mind begins to wander, the rhythmic pace of his breathing being thrown off the more he thinks about her and his desires. "I'm in love with you," he whispers suddenly, quietly enough that he's not sure Akane heard him, and he's okay with that. She doesn’t need to hear him so long as she knows how much he cares for and appreciates her. His words are more than a statement, more than a confession, they are his truth. He loves her. With every fiber of his being. From the bottom of his heart and soul, he loves her. And he wants to show her. He wants to prove to her how much he truly cares about her. And when he does, he hopes that she will finally realize just how much she means to him. Whether or not she returns his feelings is irrelevant. Her knowing how much she means to him is enough.
She laughs softly as she catches him staring at her. His face is flushed red with embarrassment. As he turns away from her, he runs his fingers through his short black hair. "You are so cute sometimes," she says gently, almost mindlessly.
At hearing her words, Nekomaru looks back at Akane, trying not to blush too heavily because the last thing he wants to do is let her know just how embarrassed she can make him feel.
"We should probably sleep," he points out, glancing away from her as he tries to change the subject.
"We have to wake up early tomorrow," Akane says, more to herself than Nekomaru.
"Yeah," he agrees. They have a flight to catch in a few hours and they both want to get as much sleep as possible before then.
Nekomaru walks over to his side of the room before opening the small closet, revealing the empty space before closing it again. He looks at the two beds in the room, desperately wishing that things had gone his way.
Nekomaru had been filled with ambition when he booked this room, but when he first entered the room, his heart sank as he saw two beds instead of one. He had wanted to share a bed with Akane, with the woman he loves, and had hoped she would be too tired to object. It seems fate had other plans though as they were now in their hotel room, with no chance of Nekomaru getting what he wanted.
Nekomaru, of course, felt guilty about trying to deceive Akane as well as for wanting something he knew he couldn’t have, but he couldn't help himself. He knew it was selfish but he wanted one night where he could pretend as though they were more than friends before living his life by her side as nothing more than her best friend and coach, never trying for anything more. She deserves so much more than he can give her. She deserves love, happiness, and to achieve each of her goals. He'll do anything in his power to help her obtain these things, even if it means sacrificing his dreams for her own.
"Choose whichever bed you want and I'll take the other," Nekomaru says before letting out a sigh, trying to force his thoughts and desires from his mind.
A smile curves Akane's face as she looks around their hotel room for the first time this evening. The soft yellow light of the bedside lamp shines on her face, illuminating her sunny expression like a spotlight. Nekomaru knows he will forever cherish this sight. "You're so nice," she tells him.
He shrugs, a smile gracing his lips at her words. "Only for you."
She shakes her head gently. "Shut up," she says before laughing softly. She rolls her eyes slightly but her smile never falters.
Nekomaru chuckles, his voice gruff. "I'll let you change before me. You go ahead," he says before turning around.
Akane nods as she slides the shoulder straps down her arms, stretching the material over her chest before shedding herself of her skin-tight leotard completely. She discards it to the side before she shimmies out of her leggings. Nekomaru can't see any of this and he wouldn't dare take a peek at her, too respectful of her to even consider it an option. That doesn't stop his mind from providing him with very unhelpful images of Akane's lack of clothing, her soft flesh, and her tanned skin. The sounds of her shifting behind him only serve to paint a clearer picture of what she is doing no more than a few feet from him. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, attempting to calm his rapidly beating heart.
After a couple more moments, Akane speaks up once more. "Okay, you can turn around now."
Nekomaru turns around, his eyes meeting Akane's as he takes in the sight of her. She's wearing an oversized, white t-shirt that ends at her upper thighs and hugs her curves, especially around her chest and hips. It’s a shirt he'd recognize anywhere. It's his, after all. He had let her borrow it one day after the buttons on her own snapped.
His eyes wander down to the sight of her toned legs, his breath hitching in his throat. He wants nothing more than to reach out and touch her, to feel her skin against his fingertips, to kiss her until they're both breathless.
But he can't. He knows that if he were to act on his desires, he would ruin everything. Akane deserves more than that. She's an incredible, strong, and capable woman, her beauty is simply a bonus on top of the amazing person she already is. He sees the way people, especially men look at her. It's the same way he's looking at her now but really shouldn’t be. Because despite how much he knows it would hurt her, despite how much he knows it would ruin their friendship, a part of him wishes that he could be more than just her friend. He can't help but admire the beauty that radiates from her, but she's so much more than just a pretty face and attractive body. She's fun, funny, and everything he's ever wanted. She deserves so much, so much he isn't sure he can give her. She deserves someone who can be there for her, and who can support her dreams without getting in the way. Someone who won't make their relationship complicated by adding romantic feelings into the mix.
Nekomaru forces himself to look away, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. "I, uh, I'm... I'm going to change now," he stutters out, hastily turning around and grabbing his own set of clothes from his suitcase. He changes quickly, performing the actions without thinking. His mind is too focused on other things, especially on Akane.
When he turns back around, she's already in bed with the lights off, her chestnut hair splayed out on the fluffed-up, white pillow beneath her head. He makes his way over to the side of his own bed before taking the corner of the blankets on top into his hand. He has one more idea, one more last-ditch effort to possibly sleep in the same bed as the one he loves. He stands there for a few moments, not saying anything, simply staring at the bed, wondering whether or not he should go through with it.
"What's wrong?" Akane asks, her voice sleepy.
"The bed... it's dirty," he states. There's no going back now. He's already deceived her so many times, at this point, what’s one more?
In response, Akane simply lifts the comforter on her bed, wordlessly inviting him to join her.
Nekomaru's breath hitches in his throat. Why is she…?
"Are you sure?" he asks, honestly not having expected her to play along with his scheme.
She nods vigorously, "Yeah, I'm sure."
He nods back slowly. "Okay... Thank you."
Nekomaru quickly makes his way over to Akane's bed, lowering himself down onto it, feeling the mattress compress under his weight. The mattress is soft and comfortable, which is quite a surprise because it's just a standard hotel bed.
"Is it good?" Akane asks, her voice still soft and sleepy.
"It's, uh, it's good... yeah," he stutters. He rubs the back of his neck uncomfortably, the skin hot and burning beneath his palm. He can't believe he's in bed with the woman he loves.
"Good," she mumbles before shutting her eyes. "Goodnight, Nekomaru."
"Goodnight, Akane. Sweet dreams," he says, attempting to fully relax in preparation for sleep despite his nervousness.
She hums in response, not saying anything, her breathing steadily evening out.
Nekomaru turns over on the bed, facing his bedmate, and stares at her in the darkness. He quickly closes his eyes, not wanting to notice how beautiful she looks in the dark. He doesn't want to think about how close she is, how good she smells. He doesn't want to notice how her hair splayed out on the pillow, or how soft it looks. He doesn't want to notice any of these things.
Eventually, the sound of Akane's soft snores reach his ears and Nekomaru can't help but smile at how adorable she is. While some things about her can frustrate him at times, mainly her lack of motivation when it comes to training, he wouldn't have her any other way. Akane is the person she is not only because of her good points but also her flaws, and he adores each and every one.
Nekomaru's love for Akane is what brought him to this difficult situation in the first place. He so desperately wanted to be as close to her as possible, and in the heat of the moment, he was filled with a strong desire that he couldn't turn away from. But now, lying in the same bed with her, he is filled with guilt and regret. He knows that this isn't right and that he should have never even considered it.
He tosses and turns in bed, trying to get comfortable but unable to escape the thoughts that are filling his head. He hates himself for feeling this way toward Akane and wonders how she would react if he told her the truth. But if he were to do that now, it would only make things worse. He knows that he should stay silent, but his conscience is telling him otherwise.
Finally, Nekomaru decides that he can't take it anymore and reaches a hand out to shake Akane awake. He doesn't want to cause her any more distress by telling her the truth, but it is something that needs to be done, if not for himself then for her sake.
When Akane doesn't move to wake up, Nekomaru shakes her again, a little bit more forcefully this time.
"Akane, wake up," he whispers, his voice still a little hoarse from the stress of the situation.
"Ugh... Nekomaru?" she mumbles into the pillow before turning to face him. Her eyes are dazed and sleep-deprived. "What's wrong?"
"I... I just wanted to tell you something," he replies, choosing his words carefully.
"Okay...? What is it?" she asks, her voice still incredibly groggy. Her confusion as to why he suddenly woke her is palpable. He normally wouldn't disturb her like this, they both know that... unless it was important.
"I, um..." he stammers, knowing he can't put this off any longer. He has to tell her and he has to tell her now. Maybe telling her now, when she's half asleep, will make it easier, he certainly hopes so but he truly does not know.
"I... I lied," Nekomaru says when he finally musters up the courage. His voice is almost a whisper, so soft, and so unlike him. He's usually loud and boisterous and right now, he’s none of that. It's almost as though he's a completely different person.
"About what?" Akane questions, sitting up slightly. It's clear to him that she's starting to feel a bit nervous herself.
"About the bed being dirty. It... It isn't," he confesses, shaking his head slightly. It feels good to admit that he lied to her but the guilt still hasn't diminished.
"Oh... okay..." she says, her brows furrowing slightly. "But, why?"
He takes a deep breath, "Because... I didn't want to sleep in the other bed."
"Why not?" she asks as her confusion rapidly grows.
"Because I wanted to sleep with you," he confesses, his eyes pleading with her. He could tell that she was starting to get it, or at least he hoped she was. He didn't want to say it out loud, he just wanted her to understand, no matter how unlikely he knows that is.
"So..." she says slowly, trying to process the situation. "So, you lied... so that you could sleep in the same bed as me?"
He nods simply before beginning to stand up from the bed, not wanting to face the woman he just deceived, the person he is supposed to love, support, and respect. "Yeah, I'm sorry. I'll sleep in the other-"
Suddenly, Nekomaru feels something grasp his arm and gently pull him back toward the bed.
"I... I knew," Akane states softly.
"What?" He asks, almost not believing his ears.
"I knew the bed wasn't dirty."
Nekomaru slowly turns around to face her. It's his turn to be confused. "You did? Then why...?" He's not sure exactly what it is that he wants to say. Why did she let him stay in the same room as her while she was changing? Why is she wearing his shirt? Why did she play along with his ploy? Just... why? There are so many things about tonight that simply don't make any sense to him.
Akane turns her head so she's facing the wall and for the first time, he sees that she's blushing.
"Because I wanted you to sleep with me," she admits, her voice barely above a whisper.
"W-What...?" He finds himself stammering, unable to find the words to express what he's feeling. He had felt so guilty about lying to her about this, so knowing that she too, wanted to sleep together was shocking, to say the least.
"I wanted to sleep with you too, Nekomaru," she reiterates, turning her head so she's looking down at her lap.
He takes a moment, letting her words sink in. "You... wanted to sleep with me?" He almost can't believe it, almost thinks this must be a dream. However, as his eyes scan her face, taking note of every emotion she so clearly shows, her nervousness, her embarrassment, and her insecurity, he understands just how real all of this is.
Akane nods, "Yeah, I did."
"Why...?" He asks, unable to keep the blush from spreading across his cheeks.
"Why did I want to sleep with you?" She asks.
He nods slowly, not wanting to admit how hopeful and anxious he is as he awaits her response.
"Why? Because I love you, you idiot!" Akane shouts, her voice now dripping with emotion. Gripping the hem of her shirt tightly in her fists, she continues, "I've loved you for so long but I thought you'd never feel the same way. But then tonight happened and I was just so happy that I got the chance to be close to you, even if it was just as friends. I don't want to hide my feelings anymore. I... I just want to be with you."
Nekomaru's heart swells with emotion as he listens to her words. He had never expected Akane to feel the same way he did, let alone confess to him like this. But now that he knows, he can't deny his feelings any longer.
"I love you too, Akane," he says, walking forward a couple of steps so he can cup her face in his hands and look into her eyes. "I've loved you for years, I was just too scared to tell you. You deserve so much, Akane, so much that I'm not sure I can give you. But if you're serious, then I'll do everything in my power to make you happy. I promise."
"But you already make me happy," she responds with a genuine smile on her face. Her green eyes are glistening with tears that threaten to spill.
"I do?" he asks, his voice cracking slightly. He can feel tears beginning to prickle at the corner of his eyes as well.
Akane nods, her smile not once faltering despite continuing to fight back her tears. "Yes, you do! And I won't let you forget it..." she whispers, situating herself so that she’s kneeling on the bed before leaning in and pressing her lips against his.
Nekomaru's heart feels like it's about to burst but he doesn't care. He wants her just as much as she wants him and as his hands slowly and carefully wrap around her waist, pulling her body close to his, he can feel his fondness for her bubbling to the surface. She's always been incredible to him but this, this is something more, this is love.
