Chapter Text
Tech made an attempt to tweak his goggles, but found they were not there. He lifted his fingers to his brow to confirm that they were missing, as was his helmet. Yet, he realized he could see very clearly without them. He must have hit his head fairly hard on the way down.
He had been thinking all day, murky and puzzling as it all was. It was most odd, but he was there for a reason.
With a shrug of his unarmored shoulders, Tech cleared his throat. “Ahem. Phee?”
Phee's ears perked up and she stopped what she was doing, which was scraping some carbon scoring from one of the plug-in sockets on her droid, Mel, in a work room on Pabu. She had spent a lot of time in there surrounded by conduits, servomotors, and tools of every variety when they were repairing the island's infrastructure and homes after the tsunami. And she heard that particular voice many times in that same room.
Her first instinct was to huff snidely. Turning her head without really looking at him, she said, “Well, look what the lothcat dragged in. What do you want? How did your secret mission go?” she said sarcastically with a roll of her eyes. Now that Phee got that out of the way, she could get back to work on Mel and see if she could afford Tech the same indifference he afforded her last time she saw him.
Tech stood there a while without responding, searching the floor for an answer as if there was some minute clue that would appear to him between the grates. He came to an unsatisfactory conclusion. He did not know what he wanted. He knew he was there for a reason, but he did not know why exactly. He did not even know how he got there, only that he had a very pressing urge to see and talk to Phee and hoped that giving in to that urge would help alleviate his confusion. Perhaps he suffered a concussion on the last mission and his head was just still cloudy.
His eyes wandered up to her back currently turned to him, her figure slender and statuesque even sitting on the crate. A figure that he once felt in his arms when they rappelled up the island fortress's walls to help get others to safety. Although physical touch was not something he usually desired, he suddenly had the urge to hold her again, not only as a comfort to him, but her as well, but he wasn't so sure she would approve of that.
He had become accustomed to her sassy attitude and comments. This time she seemed different. Her usual carefree demeanor was now tinged with anger.
Though Tech may not have been capable of revealing his feelings the way others took it in stride, he still had them and he could still observe them in others. It was very obvious to him why she gave him the proverbial cold shoulder. He did not give her a proper goodbye, did not even feign to think that he should need to. No. Why would he? She knew that he valued her friendship as much as he valued his 'family' as Omega called it. He did not have to make it blatantly apparent with a public display of admission. He did not want to presume to think that was something she required or make her feel uncomfortable should she not.
Although, she never made him feel that way. When she was more familiar with him than the others. When she touched him. Perhaps at first, but soon it became pleasant. Surprisingly welcome and expected even. Yet, he could never find the courage to reciprocate anything more than his full attention in a conversation and a smile here and there. He should not know what to do even if he did find the courage.
On the other hand, he remembered his behavior being rather cold, more than usual, going so far as to label a friendly goodbye as a briefing. He winced at himself. What was he thinking?
Was it because he lacked the emotional maturity of Wrecker, the importance of the mission, or just fear of making a fool of himself? He always congratulated himself for being so intelligent, what if he were to appear the opposite, especially to someone he cared for?
When Tech did not answer her for many moments Phee finally did take a peek at him. She cursed the little pitter patter in her heart and nervous knots in her belly from the sight of those expressive brown eyes staring back at her. But, a shadow of sadness in those same eyes of his made her to turn full around with a little worry. Plus, he wasn't wearing his goggles. She had never seen him without them, but she knew in addition to his gloominess that something was not right.
“Tech? Lothcat got your tongue?” Phee raised an eyebrow at him, a cross between confusion and concern. She purposely teased him when they spent time together to get some sort of reaction, be it snarky or adorable, but she had never seen him like this. It was not like him to not have anything to say, except when she teased him. And though she was a little miffed, she was not doing that right now, far from it.
Tech had balked at answering for sheer bafflement, finally he responded. “I...do not know.”
“Well, that's a first,” she said playfully, trying to lighten his mood with a little harmless jab. She stood up and came toward him and now that she was closer she saw that there were cuts and bruises splattered on his brow and eyes, She could not stifle the gasp that came from her lips. "What happened to you? You're injured," she said with concern, instinctually lifting a hand to his face to comfort him.
He backed away sharply. "That is not necessary." His hand reached up to his face and felt where Phee's eyes were focused on to find that there were indeed lacerations in the skin around his eyes. What happened? This was a question Tech could answer. “The mission did not end well. That much I can recollect.”
Phee eyed him up and down with skepticism. “There's a lot of that going around lately. Maybe you needed a professional with you.” She hinted that she was the professional with a puckering of her lips to the side in a playfully pompous smirk. She had fully expected him to say something snarky about her definition of professional being different from his, but instead, he remained sad.
“I am not certain that would have helped this time,” he replied with a soft and sorrowful tone, his face as serious as she had ever seen it.
The smirk on Phee's face faded as her concern deepened. “Where's Omega? Where's everybody else?” Her eyes darted beyond him, out the door to the late afternoon sky.
“I am not certain where they are. But I believe they are alive.”
Phee's eyes widened. “That's an odd way of putting it.” Phee gave him a strange look, but she was used to his scientifically blunt answers by now. “Probably feasting with Shep,” she said as she walked over to the counter and grabbed up a new tool. "I'm sure Wrecker worked up an appetite." Phee chuckled.
Tech sure was acting weird, but maybe she was just tired, or heartbroken at his lack of affection last time they saw each other.
“I do not think so," Tech said.
Phee turned sharply around. He was not only injured and acting weird, but he seemed a little confused as well. “What's with you? Why are you acting funny?”
Tech gazed into her eyes. He was sorry to cause her worry. He was sorry for a great many things. An unwelcome realization came to him. “After some deliberation, I do believe it possible that I returned to say goodbye.”
Phee crossed her arms over her chest. “Heh. It took you some deliberation to come to that conclusion? We both know you don't need to say goodbye. Why are you really here?”
“To say...goodbye. As I should have before I left.”
“Well, usually when you return to someone, you say hello, not goodbye.” Phee came closer and could not resist the urge to caress his face, maybe help him feel better from the injuries on his handsome face, especially since it was no longer hidden by those clunky goggles. This time he did not flinch away as she ran her knuckles against his cheek only to find that she was not actually touching him. She was not touching anything but air. She got angry again.
“Are you serious?” she exclaimed. “After all we've been through, you can't even say hello or goodbye in person? You send a droid or one of your contraptions with a holo transmission?” Phee's eyes darted around the room to see if she could find out where the holosignal was coming from so she could destroy it.
Tech, meanwhile, was shocked to have seen Phee's hand go right through him, especially when he had actually welcomed the comfort of her touch.
As Phee jotted around the room looking for the contraption which did not exist, Tech began to think a little bit more about what had just happened. His suspicions had been confirmed one by one. He had heard of such phenomena among Force wielders who had the ability to return to life as apparitions. He was no Jedi, however, and the fact that he had the ability to appear as an apparition left him unsettled.
“Phee,” Tech called out to get her to halt her search, “Phee, I am not a holo. Although I am here in person, I am sorry to say it may not be in the tangible sense.”
“Not in the tangible sense? What does that even mean? Tech..." Phee studied the man that stood before her. He looked real. There was no sputtering typical of a holo. No transparency as often seen in magical tricks. Yet, her hand went right through him. If it was a trick, it was the best one she ever saw. But even though she knew Tech to have a sense of humor, dry as it was, he never took any interest in tricks before. "You're beginning to frighten me. And with all of the dark caverns and spooky, booby trapped temples I've been in, that is saying something.”
“I do not mean to frighten you. That is the last thing I would ever want to do to you.“
Phee was no fool. She had been around enough of the galaxy to know and see things that would turn the ordinary layperson to stone. But she never actually believed any of it, it could always be explained by some sort of chemistry or physics, the same kind of reasoning Tech would use, one of the reasons she kept falling for him more and more. But something was becoming more and more clear. It was as unbelievable as some of the tales she told.
“Tech." Phee became serious herself. "What was the last thing you remember?”
There was a hesitancy to answer. A reluctance. Lest it be true. “Falling,” Tech stated simply, but aware of the implications.
Phee's heart all the sudden felt heavy, laden with a sorrow that matched Tech's soft and melancholy tone. “I was afraid you'd say something like that. Oh, Brown Eyes...” Phee's eyes started to well with tears. Especially when Tech expressed an affectionate relief at hearing her finally use her pet nickname for him and that she was no longer angry with him. How could she be?
Tech gazed into her brown eyes, getting lost in their warmth. "To be truthful, I think I have finally found the courage. The courage to say that I had been falling, for you, all along."
The tears flowed freely from Phee's eyes. To hear Tech utter those words both lifted her spirits and crushed them at the same time. Because she heard as many stories as she had told, and she knew she wouldn't be able to look in to those beautiful brown eyes much longer. There would be no more teasing him with little caresses, grabbing his arm and leading him here and there, no going on adventures, no academic conversation, no gentle embrace, no passionate embrace, no kisses or...
Phee returned to the workbench and gently laid the tool down, picking up instead the cleanest rag she could find to wipe her eyes and nose. After sniffling a little bit more, she got scared that Tech wouldn't be there when she turned back around, but thankfully he was.
"I am ever so sorry to have caused you distress." Tech took a step toward her, but realized it was pointless. "It is, unfortunately, not a strength of mine, but I wish there was something I could do to comfort you."
Phee walked towards him and looked up into his eyes, doing her best to keep herself from tearing up again. "You know, Brown Eyes, I've been doing some deliberating of my own. I'm kind of honored that it was important enough for you to stay a little while longer just to see me.”
“Yes. Well, I had this unfinished business to attend to." Tech attempted to push his goggles up, but found they were not there.
Phee chuckled at him. "Old habits... Unfinished business, like a briefing?" Phee raised a sarcastic eyebrow.
Embarrassment spread on Tech's face. "I apologize for the choice of words I used when we parted. I regret my actions and words that evening."
“It's okay, Brown Eyes. I understand you. And I..." If Tech could have the courage then so could she. "I love you. For who you are. Even when you can't take a hint.”
Tech smiled at her, and it was as genuine as all of the other times she made him smile. “I do believe it is almost that time of day when all of the lights turn on in the village below. Shall we?”
"I'd like that."
Tech moved aside and held out his arm as a gentleman to let her pass through the doorway first. He followed her to the edge of the fortress.
With Tech beside her, Phee looked over the flower strewn veranda. A gentle breeze swirled about, delivering the scent of the salty ocean air that she missed so much when she was out on one of her own missions and adventures. She looked up at Tech and smiled. Even in his current form, whatever that was, the setting golden hues of the sun played with the warm colors in his eyes, not unlike the glittering ripples of light on the sea below.
The breeze made the flowers in front of them to wave to and fro like a dancing lullaby. “These flowers are nearly the same color as your hair, very pretty. As are you, my dear.”
As compliments go, it wasn't the smoothest Phee had ever heard, but she knew it was direct from Tech's big, awkward heart. Tears began to sting Phee's eyes again so she met that challenge with humor to hold them at bay. “Well, don't you go calling me Purple Hair, Brown Eyes.”
Tech smiled and huffed a bashful and timid chuckle.
“I do like being called dear, though,” Phee hinted.
This time, Tech got the hint. "I shall keep that in mind, Dear."
Phee grinned up at him with affection in her eyes and he reciprocated, nudging closer to her, even though much to their mutual chagrin, they could not physically touch.
The lights turned on one by one in the rebuilt homes below, one could almost not tell where the ocean ended. The last light came on as the sun was just a sliver on the horizon, beneath a darkening prismatic sky, twinkling lights, twinkling stars, twinkling eyes.
Phee did not want to take her eyes away from his, nor Tech, hers. A gull off in the distance squawking finally did tear their attention away from one another, as the final glowing ember of the sun descended below the horizon, and the darkness of the evening was upon them.
When Phee turned to look back at those Brown Eyes, she was sad to see that Tech was no longer standing beside her. She was....alone.
Her heart jumped into her throat, she felt a little sick, but a breeze blowing through brought the smell of the flowers to her, the same scent she remembered from the first time she had brought Tech and his family to Pabu. And she remembered the scent of him as well. She closed her eyes and remembered his handsome face, the intensity and innocence of his eyes.
It was not the goodbye she was hoping for, but she took comfort in the fact that he finally had the courage to open up his feelings to her and that he felt the same as she, and that was something she would gladly carry within the Archium of her heart, forever.