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It hadn’t even occurred to you to mention your insomnia to Viktor when you first started dating. With his work schedule and sleep habits you knew from the beginning, the likelihood of him ever spending the night at your place sleeping was low to none. You had hoped he would never have to see you during one of your bouts. They weren't pleasant; if not being able to sleep wasn't bad enough, the panic attacks that came with were their own kind of hell.
As time had gone by it had faded from your memory that you had never told him.
He eventually did find out, the first night he had stayed over he had woken up to find you siting on the floor of the living room, desperately trying to quiet your panic attack. He had been very understanding and patient given the fact that it was 3 am. He had sat with you and listened as you had explained your nightmares, the reasons they haunted you so much, the reasons you couldn't let yourself sleep. He didn't leave your side until you had gotten through the worst of it, the whole time he held your hand. It was nice to have someone to talk you through it, someone who understood what it was like to have your mind so loud that you couldn't rest. To be unable to sleep for fear of what traumatic memory your sleeping brain might remix into a whole new nightmare. It was yet another thing you two had in common, it made you feel safe.
When he had eventually gotten you calm enough to lay back down in bed he had praised and soothed you as you fell asleep. You had struggled to make much sense of his words, the lack of sleep and emotions of the night had made it hard for your brain to focus on anything but how comfy the bed beneath you felt. One sentence had stuck in your mind though:
“Don’t worry. You don’t have to go through this alone anymore.”
At the time you had gladly accepted his words and drifted back to sleep. Now? Now you couldn’t stop dissecting them in your mind. Surely he wasn’t serious. Viktor was a busy man, you had known this before you had even agreed to date him. You couldn’t just run to him every time your insomnia acted up, even if it would be nice to have the excuse to see him more regularly.
For weeks you tried to find the words to ask Viktor what he had meant, if he had just said it in the moment to help soothe you. You were sure he wouldn’t be so cruel intentionally, but you didn’t want to get your hopes up either. Viktor was brilliant at many things, self awareness though? Yeah, no. The more you thought about it the more you were unsure. It was possible Viktor had just said it in the heat of the moment without thinking through the implications.
Luckily for you, Viktor soon brought about an end to your conundrum. As you had come home after a long day at work you found a small piece of paper with your name on it. You would recognize the handwriting anywhere.
Dearest,
For too long you’ve struggled alone. The next time you can’t sleep, come to my lab. I have a surprise for you.
Yours,
Viktor
It nearly brought tears to your eyes, you made a mental note to get something for Viktor as a thank you later. You found yourself curious what he could possibly have planned. A cure for insomnia maybe? It was doubtful, no medication would undo the thoughts and memories that haunted you at night, no matter what you wished.
It didn’t take long before you needed to take Viktor up on his offer. You had woken up from a particularly bad nightmare that had left you near a panic attack. You had debated for a few moments if you should bother Viktor so late, even with the note. As you studied your trembling hands you had a realization. You needed Viktor. Just to be near him, the last thing you wanted was to be alone with your thoughts and memories. You shakily got out of bed and pulled on your coat before you set out to Viktor’s lab.
Your soft knock on the door was met by a quiet, tried voice.
“It’s not locked.”
You entered quickly, eager to see your boyfriend and even more eager for anything to distract you from your nightmares. As you entered the lab Viktor spun around in his chair, freezing slightly as he saw your shaking form.
“Oh my love.”
He stood and made his way across the room to you, his arm that wasn't preoccupied with his crutch outstretched towards you. You gladly accepted his embrace as you felt yourself start to fall apart in his arms. He caressed your hair as you let it all out. You don't know how long you stood there but Viktor held you through it, never once showing impatience or annoyance. When you had managed to calm your breathing enough, you pulled back to look at Viktor properly.
“I’m sorry, I just-”
“Shh, it’s ok. I told you to come here, yes?”
He cupped your cheek before kissing your forehead. You gazed into his amber eyes, you felt almost breathless at how tender his expression was. You reached up to his face, tracing a thumb over his cheek as you two stared at each other in comfortable silence.
“Come, let me show you your surprise.”
Viktor took your hand before slowly leading you to a corner of his lab. To your surprise there was a rather comfortable set up of a small cot, a miniature bookshelf filled with your favorite books, and a few other treats and knickknacks you had expressed interest in during your time with Viktor. You looked back to Viktor to find him awkwardly shifting his weight from foot to foot. He looked almost nervous.
“I, em, I wanted to give you a space to be away from your thoughts when you can’t sleep and I'll be nearby if you need. You don’t have to sleep here, you’re welcome to come and go as you please-”
You took his hand in yours and leaned forward to cut off his nervous ramblings by kissing him as tenderly and deeply as you could. Viktor hummed contently into the kiss as he brought his arm around your waist to pull you close.
“Thank you Viktor, I love it.”
Viktor kissed you again before making sure you were comfortable. Once he was certain you were alright he resumed his work, checking in every half hour or so. You picked up one of the books from the collection and began to lose yourself in it.
Even if you and Viktor weren’t talking, the closeness was enough. Knowing he was within arms reach if you needed him gave you enough peace of mind to let yourself relax. As the hours went by you found your eyes starting to grow heavy. You tried to fight the feeling, unsure of how Viktor would feel if you fell asleep in his lab. Unsure of how Jayce would react to finding you passed out in the corner. You let out a yawn before you were met with a soft chuckle.
“Getting tired, eh?”
“Maybe a little.”
“It’s ok love, rest. You deserve it.”
You shifted uncomfortably, unsure of how to phrase the question. Viktor, luckily seemed to understand.
"Jayce won't mind. He's rarely in these days."
You found some comfort in that. You started to begin to settle in before a thought flashed in your mind. Viktor. He must be exhausted. Not content to let your boyfriend ruin his own sleep while trying to help with yours, you sat back up and called out.
“What about you? You’ve had even less sleep than I have.”
As much as you appreciated Viktor looking out for you, you were damned if you would let him do so at the expense of his own health. Viktor smiled softly at you before gazing back at his work.
“ I’ll join you when I’m done. ”
“You’d better, mister.”
He snorted out a laugh before addressing you with a kind but firm voice.
"I promise. Now, rest. You need it."
You settled back into the cot and let yourself relax fully. It was surprisingly comfortable and you quickly found yourself letting sleep overtake you, no longer burdened by your doubts. For now you could just exist in this space, safe and comfortable. You found yourself gently jolted awake by the feeling of Viktor trying, and failing, to stealthily climb onto the cot next to you. You let out a sleepy hum as you rolled to face him. He froze in place before offering you a sheepish smile.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."
"'s ok. You can make it up to me by holding me." You replied while reaching an arm out to do grabby hands at the scientist.
Viktor chuckled softly before moving to hold you. He maneuvered so you had your head lying on his chest while he slowly traced shapes on your back.
"Hey, Vik?"
"Mmm?"
"Thank you. Truly. I don't know if I'll ever be able to thank you enough."
Viktor's hand moved slowly up your back before resting on the back of your head, he leaned forward to press a kiss to the top of your head.
" I meant what I said. You don't have to do this alone."
You kissed him once more before settling back onto his chest, letting your breathing sync with his as you felt your eyes grow heavy once more. For once, you weren't worried about what dreams may come. All that mattered was the slow, soft sound of his heartbeat and his gentle words filling your ears as you let yourself surrender to sleep.
"Sleep well, my love."