Archive of Our Own ^beta

—--

It starts the same way every time.

Somewhere dark, a blurred memory when conscious that seems to be hidden with great detail in her sub conscious. Like a veil pulled back to reveal the most horrific, grotesque sight, one that she can't run away from because she's already staring it right in the face.

Blake writhes under the burning touch that sears her wrists, a thumb and index finger wrapped tight around them, thorns burrowing further beneath her skin with each little movement.

Her cheek stings; it feels hot and raw, and yet she lays there and does nothing to stop him as contact is made again, and again, whether jabbing his knee or slamming his elbows or even letting go of her wrists just to add repeated slaps to her already reddened face. And brothers, it burns .

Every time she screams, nothing comes out. Yet there he is, yelling and cursing and prodding at every little insecurity that he knows she hates so much, and all she can do is wriggle and try to squirm her way out of his hold and–

"Blake!" He screams in her face and her ears pin themselves to her head, the echo bouncing around her skull and her eardrums stinging.

The words between the next time he yells her name are all a blur, not even trying to tune him out anymore – it's like she's fighting for her life all over again, and it's just him .

Again, "Blake!" This time more echoed, far off. Not even yelling her name is bringing her attention back. She can't get away. Can't fight him. So why bother, after all–

"Blake!" She deserves it, probably. That's what he says, anyway.

By now, it's barely his voice, but she's so used to the burning and the sting that she doesn't care to listen. Just let it happen. Let his tantrum go by. She'll be safe after.

"Blake, you gotta wake up!" Get it over with, and–

The second a foreign hand grazes her shoulder, every reflex in her body sparks like lightning and she bolts upright with a heaving gasp, her hand coming up to her throat to swat away a hand that was never there to begin with.

But there's another hand, not on her, but out in front of her, palm open and fingers outstretched like a surrender. Like they're yelling I'm not a threat .

As her eyes finally focus and she has their shakiness under her control, she follows the arm the hands belong to, then the shoulders, and, Brothers , she should've known.

Knelt by her bed is her partner, Yang, whom she'd been paired with just a few months prior. Her brows are knit with worry and even despite that, her eyes are so, so soft.

Blake can't fathom that, however, because the moonlight shining between the crack in the curtains tells her plenty – Yang woke up to this. And yet here she is, a warm presence by her bedside as she watches her usually composed partner unravel at the seam.

"Blake," Yang calls out, so sweet and warm that you could cut through butter with her tone. "You gotta take a deep breath," She speaks slowly, her hands slowly lowering to brace herself on the mattress.

Only when those words leave her mouth does Blake's attention finally turn away from the blitzing blonde before her and to herself instead; her lungs ache , her head is pounding, and she can't get a grip on any of it.

Yang watches her unfold, biting the inside of her cheek, brain reeling back for advice to nights she'd spent like this with Ruby.

"Blake, eyes on me." She says, firm. Her palm comes up, open, steady and careful as to not startle her partner. "We're gonna breathe in for five, and breathe out for five, too. I'll do it with you, yeah?"

The raven-haired girl eyes the blonde and hesitates to take a deep breath when the first finger goes down – she worries Yang will click her tongue, roll her eyes, but instead she just puts the finger back up and waits for Blake to signal that she's ready.

She does, and as the first finger falls, she tries her best to suck in a deep breath.

She fails. As does almost everyone on the first step to, well, anything.

"Hey, easy , it's okay– don't worry, we can go again when you're ready." Yang croons, and her eyes wander somewhere above and behind her, to which she mouths something – Blake is too worried about the tingling of her dream-stung skin to notice, but Yang is gesturing for a worried Weiss to go back to sleep, who'd awoken having overheard the commotion on the other bunk.

Blake takes a moment before making a small noise and sucking in air, fighting against her hiccups and sobs ravaging her dry throat. Five. She holds it for a moment and slowly begins to release it, having to grapple with it to stop the air from tumbling out and the hyperventilating resuming.

Miraculously, she manages, and she meets Yang's eyes to find her beaming.

"Good, that's so good, Blake," She tries to keep her voice down for their teammates, but she can't help but praise her considering how terrified she seemed upon waking up – this is a big step. "We're gonna go again, yeah?" Because her breathing is still uneven and ragged.

Yang waits for her partner's signal again, exaggerating her breaths and exhales along with the fall of her fingers in an attempt to make Blake feel even just a little less alone in all of this.

They go again, and again, and again until Blake's less shaky and her heart rate is substantially slower, and, of course, her breathing is at least a little even.

With each passing breath, it became harder and harder to look Yang in the eyes. How long must they have been awake, just breathing together? They have to get up in a matter of hours for classes, and all she'd done was set her partner's sleep schedule back when it could've just been one of them that had suffered, not both.

"What's got you thinking so hard?" Yang chimes in, still smiling so sweetly that it makes Blake's heart ache.

Blake pulls in a breath, shaky still, but enough to speak. "Nothing, I'm Just– I'm sorry," She starts, "And thank you, and– You can go back to bed."

At that, Yang clicks her tongue and nods a bit, but still doesn't move. There's a pause while she pieces together her next words. "Do you want me to go to bed?"

"What?" Blake raises her brows, "You need sleep, Yang. We have classes, so… yeah."

Her blunt reasoning catches Yang completely off guard, and she snickers slightly. "No, not that, silly." The blonde smirks, and Blake can't help but flush slightly – either that or her skin is still burning. Maybe both. "I mean do you want company or not?"

Oh. That's different.

Usually, Blake is good at pushing people away. Reading a book and spending all of her time getting through it, diverting conversations just so that her focus doesn't waver from her page, and yet–

"Please stay." Her voice breaks, practically pleading.

Yang swears her heart shatters then and there, because her often stoic partner had never been this vulnerable before. Not in front of her.

"Of course." Yang nods, her words solid. "Not going anywhere."

Blake is still curled up with her knees against her chest, Yang sitting by her bedside looking up at her with so much care and consideration that an unfamiliar sensation returns to the shorter girl – butterflies .

She swallows and pushes the feeling down into the pit of her stomach. The last time that happened, she got hurt. It's the whole reason she's up right now.

Just like before, Yang's words cut right through the silence, still hushed, however. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"About what?" Blake feigns ignorance, hoping she hadn't heard a thing. Maybe she'd just been struggling to sleep or something. Hopefully.

But Yang frowns, and Blake's heart drops. "Listen, I'm not gonna push you to talk about anything you don't want to, but… I am your partner, Blake." Her fingers rub along the edge of the mattress, feeling along the seam. "And I'll always be here if you wanna talk about anything , not just this."

Brothers , she got lucky for a partner, and still Blake just can't utter a word of admittance.

"Thank you." She murmurs in response, "Maybe one day, I just–" She sighs, "It's a lot, and I don't think I'm ready."

The blonde simply nods, a little more serious, but then she eyes the spot next to Blake. "Can I join you up there?" She jests, a little head tilt to accentuate her joke. The shorter girl simply nods, her cat ears twitching with slight alarm as the taller gets up and clambers onto the bed – Blake makes note of how she begins to move slower and with more care after seeing the movement of her ears.

There's a few beats of silence before another word hits their ears.

"I'll wait." Yang mumbles, making sure Blake can hear her. "I don't mind, and when you're ready, I'll be right there to listen."

Blake had been looking into her eyes for the entirety of her sentence, with Yang looking right back into hers; beautiful lilac and shining gold swimming together and taking in one another before newly formed drops begin to blur the dark-haired girl's vision.

As soon as she notices them forming, she whips her head away and stares at the wall. She breathes. In for five, out for five. In for five, out for five.

She can feel her partner's gaze burning the side of her head. She breathes some more.

Brothers , she's thankful, she's so, so thankful, but she's also terrified . The difference is that this time, if she feels the cracks forming just like they did with him, she knows she can break away, run, and never stop.

But Gods , she wants to hope. She really wants to believe this time it's genuine, and that it won't change.

"Blake?" Yang hums, and there's a hint of worry there. The other can't exactly say anything, because she fears if she does, she'll sob and never stop. "Hey, can–" There's hesitancy there, "Can I touch you? Hold you? You can totally sleep in my bunk tonight if you think it'll help you sleep. I don't mind,"

After that hell of a dream, Blake would take anything, even the floor, over the sweat-caked sheets she awoke to. Although sleeping right next to Yang does fill her with an odd anxiety, she pushes it down and regards it simply as worries about her dream instead.

"Please," Blake finally manages, turning to Yang, no longer afraid of showing her tears. After all, she'd just seen her at her worst. Why would she care about a few tears?

As soon as she's given the go-ahead, Yang reaches over, pulling Blake close by her shoulder so that her head can rest in the crook of her neck – she doesn't know how long they're there for, but Gods , it's comforting. Yang smells like a night around a campfire out in the wilderness, earthy with a hint of gunpowder. She closes her eyes and breathes it in, melting into the warmth of the literal Human heater.

"C'mon," The blonde eventually mumbles quietly near her partner's ear, "Let's get some rest, yeah?"

Blake nods, allowing Yang to peel her away and lead her up to the (rather unstable) top bunk. There, Yang sprawls out, leaving the other to sit there rather awkwardly for a moment without a space to lay down.

One magenta eye opens, and spies her nervous teammate. She opens her well-built arms, and watches Blake practically short-circuit; still, she doesn't question it, slowly moving to lay down right beside Yang, in her arms .

Her fluffy ear flutters and finds a home by Yang's pulse, quickly lulled by the steady rhythm. Her head sits in the crook of her neck again just like before, a relief as she was almost scared she'd never experience this comfiness again. They fit together like a jigsaw, so perfectly. Brothers , how is Yang so calm about all of this? Blake breathes in and releases it as a sigh, allowing her weight to properly sink into the mattress and her partner.

"Yang?" Blake whispers into the darkness, not knowing whether she had fallen asleep or not.

She gets lucky. "Yeah?"

Her ears flick anxiously, but land quickly back by Yang's pulse.

"Thank you." Blake says, calmed by the gentle beat of the most fiery heart she knows.

A hand comes up, fingers gently running through her hair. "Anytime, Belladonna." She jokes, leaning her cheek on Blake's hair.

Yang doesn't fall asleep for a while, despite her seemingly record-breaking time for falling asleep.

Instead, she waits, and waits, and waits– right up until she's sure Blake is sleeping. Calloused fingers continue to run through dark strands, gently untangling the knots she comes across and offering small scratches of comfort whenever her ears flutter. Magenta eyes gaze upon her sleeping form.

"Rest up," Yang hums, "I've got you."

—--

She can't sleep. Again.

Often, it's due to worry. About this, about that, about whatever , because all of those worries pale in comparison to the one that plagues her at this very moment.

That, and the clatter and rattle of the train carriage as it runs through the snowy mountains.

Her stomach churns, whether it be anxiety nausea or plain old motion sickness, Blake pushes herself upright and presses the heel of her palms into her eyes to try and alleviate the stars and sparkles in her vision – she succeeds in making them worse , to her dismay, which only fuels her ever-growing sickness.

From sitting, she gets onto her knees, then to her feet. Both teams RWBY and JNPR had crammed themselves into a single carriage, which made for a wonderful game of 'try not to step on someone' .

She feels along the wall and windows, a finger trailing the condensated panes. When she finally arrives at the other side of the carriage, she unhooks the latch for the door and steps right outside onto the platform.

Freezing air nipped at her skin, and it was only then that she realised she'd neglected to come out with anything that could keep her warm. She still wore her simple pyjamas, long (luckily) fluffy trousers and a loose tee shirt, causing the oncoming winds to bite at her joints.

It'll have to do, though, because another wave of nausea laps over her, causing her to sit right by the railing, head lolling against it as she stares out at the white, snowy plains.

Searching for her worries, her brain pushes each and every qualm into the forefront of her mind, blocking everything else out.

Yang, most importantly, was at the heart of almost every worry.

All she wants to do is make things up to her, but with that botched stunt she made earlier to help her with her bag, she just feels even further away from her than she did before.

They shared a bunk in the carriage too, but Blake has to wonder if that's only out of obligation; Weiss had snagged the bottom bed on Ruby's bunk without a second thought, leaving the pair to share the other. Would things be different, had she gotten to pick?

Out of everything, worrying about that of all things feels so fucking stupid, because it is . All her brain wants to do is run away from the truth.

She fucked up. And that fuck-up got Yang hurt. Bad . And now Yang hates her for it – rightfully – plain and simple. She can lie and cover it with reassurances and empty promises of 'we're fine' all she wants, but Blake is so sure she can see right through it.

She just doesn't realise how wrong she is.

"Blake?" She flinches, feeling so cold that she'd begun to shiver without knowing. Her eyes flit around and her head turns, eventually laying their sight upon the one thing she had, for the first time, wanted to avoid.

" Yang ?" She calls back, and Gods, she hates the way her teeth chatter. Has she been out here that long?

Wordlessly, Yang clicks her tongue and shakes her head while stripping off her fleece-lined jacket. She effortlessly slings it around Blake's shoulders, pulling it up around her neck just to make sure the cold can't get to her. There's a tug on the sleeves, and Blake (who had been dumbfounded by the action) snaps out of her thoughts to slide her arms in as prompted.

Then, she sits down with her. Not close, but not far enough to validify how disconnected Blake feels from her.

Time passes. Blake isn't sure how long, but it's long enough for a full-body shiver to run through her, violent enough that Yang catches it and turns to her.

"We should go back inside." Yang insists, almost getting to her feet, but the way her teammate sits, unmoving despite her words, sets her back down in her spot. "Blake, you're freezing ." Yang herself is fine, she's always warm, and yet she's far more concerned for Blake after everything she's done.

" Brothers , can you just–" The shorter girl shivers, her head bowing slightly out of shame.

"Just what ?" Yang squints, eyeing her partner.

"Just– I don't know ," Blake breathes, giving in, "Say you hate me. How you really feel," Her voice is thick, sobs held back in her chest, ready to burst free should she falter. "You don't have to just… pretend!" She shrugs, her shivering hands feeling stray tear droplets hit her skin, "I'd rather you just be honest, Yang, because I can't just keep… going on– " She sobs, continuing, "-Thinking we're gonna, I don't know – get what we had back,"

When her head whips around to view the face of the blonde, she's met with a knit brow and a look of disbelief.

Still, she continues. "I'd just rather you didn't bait me with false hope." Blake shakily breathes in, "And it's not your fault, I get it, y'know? Hol– holding the team together, being partners ," That word causes bile to burn the back of her throat, "But… I just want you to be honest with me. To not lie for my sake or– or even for Ruby or Weiss for that matter."

" Blake ,"

"Yang, please ,"

" No ," Yang snaps, her voice breaking, "I wouldn't– Gods , I wouldn't just… lie to you, Blake." She sounds almost in disbelief, like she can't believe Blake would even fathom her doing such a thing to her. "You know I'm not like that, and I can't say I know exactly where all of this is coming from, but–" the blonde pauses, taking a breath of cold air, "-Things aren't going to be miraculously fixed just 'cause we talked or hugged or… whatever ." Her tone is far more serious, but with enough sincerity and less malice, so that Blake can actually believe it. "But I do want to fix things between us. Believe it or not, I want what we had before back."

Blake us is watching her through half-lidded eyes as she speaks, taking in everything. Every feature, every movement, every gesture, looking for something to fall through and give her away.

But nothing does, because she isn't lying.

With her last word, Yang looks right back at her partner, eyes softening as she watches her shiver. "Will you let me hold you?" She asks gently, and it's almost a plea, longing for something she lost to come back to her, safe and sound, where it belongs.

Her counterpart doesn't even need to answer. She shuffles once, albeit slowly, towards Yang – but her speed and slight struggle due to the cold just means the blonde reaches her first.

First order of business is wrapping her coat around her a little tighter to keep the warmth in, before wrapping her own arms around Blake, pulling her into the crook of her shoulder – where she fits perfectly, where she belongs.

A moment passes in silence, Yang watching the scenery fly by while Blake absorbs the warmth she'd been craving for who knows how long.

"And… for the record," Yang starts, cutting through the silence again once they're both comfy. "If we wanna actually fix things, maybe we should start talking to each other about stuff like this instead of letting it… fester, or something."

With that, Blake can agree.

"Yeah," She breathes, shivering far less in Yang's warm embrace. "I know I haven't been the best at it–"

"Oh, don't worry, I haven't been either… sorry, didn't mean to– go on,"

Blake can't help but giggle at the awkwardness while she pieces her words together again. "-But… I wanna do this right. I promised I'm not gonna leave and I don't want to break that promise. Ever ."

"I know," Yang says, and Blake can hear her smile as she nuzzles into her hair. "And I'll make sure to talk to you about things from now on too, yeah?"

"Yeah."

Another moment of silence goes by, listening to the clatter and clunking of train parts. The scenery goes by without as much as a second to focus on any of it, although there's not much differentiation between trees, snow, more trees, more snow…

"There is… more I'd like to get off of my chest." Yang admits, a hand tracing little shapes on Blake's back, though she can't feel it that well through the coat.

As much as Blake tries to hide it, her speech is clearly laced with exhaustion. "Want to talk about it now?"

Yang catches it, and can't help but snicker. "No, no, maybe tomorrow is best. Sound good to you?"

"Mm, yeah." Blake hums, savouring her warmth. "We can start tomorrow." She slurs, feeling as though she could fall asleep right there.

"Blake?" Yang nudges, bringing her back out of almost-sleep. "Hey, don't fall asleep out here . C'mon, let's get back inside before you catch a cold. Or hypothermia," She jokes, peeling Blake off of her – the joke lands and her partner laughs, spurring a smile from the blonde as she helps her raven-haired counterpart to her feet.

Together, with not-so-subtle giggles, they attempt to tip-toe back into the carriage and over JNPR's sleeping bags, helping one another cross steadily due to the jolting of the train.

Laying back on their respective mattresses, both of them stare up – Yang at the roof, and Blake at Yang's mattress.

"Yang?" Blake murmurs into the darkness, having watched the mattress shift, hoping for consciousness.

"Hm?" She hums from above.

Her words dissolve on her tongue, and she bites the inside of her lip while she scrambles for new ones. Better ones. Ones that don't take such a leap.

"I trust you." She says. "I don't want you to think that I d–"

Yang cuts her off, "I don't think that." She mumbles, "So don't fret, alright?"

A beat of silence passes while Blake takes it in. She nods, only to realise Yang can't see her doing that. "Alright." She repeats, and then bites the inside of her lip again.

Don't leap . Take a step .

"Goodnight, Yang. Sleep well."

"Night, Blake. Sweet dreams."

—--

"Oh my god, you are insufferable!" Blake playfully pushes Yang, her back hitting the mattress. "You did not say that to her,"

Yang feigns a gasp with insane dramatics, hand coming up to her chest. "I did! You wound me, Belladonna."

"Oh, ha-ha." Blake eyerolls, before flopping down beside Yang with a giggle. "Just– what did she even say back to you?"

The taller girl props her knee up, staring at the close roof of her Atlas Academy bunk.

"She didn't. She just sorta… roller-skated off. Could tell she was kinda offended, though. Her fault for yapping my ear off the whole time." Yang shrugs, tilting her head to look at Blake– nope, too close– she resumes looking up at the roof.

"That's surprising. I thought she was more bark than that, y'know? No bite."

"Exactly! I was kinda surprised when she didn't say anything back. She had an answer to fucking everything in our battle during the Vytal festival." Yang would be lying if she said her heart didn't skip a beat as Blake giggled again, breath brushing against her neck where she rests her head.

Her eyes gaze up at the taller girl, and she dreams of a phantom movement where her hand lingers by her cheek.

Don't fuck it up. Don't leap.

Ruby and Weiss had an early-morning mission, while Yang and Blake were still waiting until a more reasonable time to get ready and head out for theirs – the room was dimmer, more to Yang's tastes (she hates how bright all the lights are here) with the curtains drawn, early morning sunlight seeping in.

"Blake?" Yang whispers.

"Hm?" She hums in response.

"Did you hear me just now?"

"Oh." Blake mutters, propping herself up slightly to get a better look at her teammate's face. "No, I– sorry, what's up?"

Hesitating for a moment, Yang sighs, trying not to make too much eye contact with the girl, the one propped up by her side, gazing down at her and tracing every one of her endearing and pretty features with her eyes.

She's blissfully unaware of Blake's action here, of course, and yet she wishes she could do the very same to her, gazing at her features, catching all her little quirks like she does when she watches her pretty sleeping form in her arms, the little twitches of her nose and the fluttering of her ears, and the way she actually purrs (Yang never mentions it in case she stops – it's too cute) when Yang runs her fingers through her hair and sorts through the little knots she finds.

Before she knows it, she's lost in thought.

"Hey, Remnant to Yang?" Blake smiles, a sweet little laugh escaping her lips.

Her partner snaps right out of it. "Oh," Yang blinks, pupils dilating when they take in the sight of Blake. "Sorry, I–" She scrambles, trying to piece together the question that had just been drowned out by so many others. When she finally remembers it, her previous thoughts have (mostly) melted away, replaced with worry. "Do you think I was too harsh? With Neon, I mean."

Blake just eyes her for a moment, and then looks off somewhere else, into the shared team room.

"I don't know." She's honest – it's one of the things Yang loves about her, but then again, Blake would absolutely say the same for Yang.

And she does.

"I guess… Yeah, it can come off as harsh, but I think honesty is key. If someone's bothering you, you should tell them." Blake's sweet, honey-glazed gaze finds its way back to Yang, and she unconsciously switches the arm she's propped on just to tuck a stray lock of wild blonde strands behind her ear. "You always do that, and I admire it. I kinda wish I had the guts you do."

"Hm." Yang hums, a smile spreading across her face. It isn't that shit-eating grin yet, though, so Blake hopes her compliment landed. She really, truly does admire her.

After a moment however, Yang's brows furrow. "Hey, hold on. You have guts."

" Yang , I can fight Grimm, sure, but I cannot tell someone to - and I quote - 'go yap somebody else's ear off.' "

Okay, yeah. It sounds harsher when it's put like that.

Wincing out of embarrassment at her words from the previous night, Yang nods, but then picks up the debate. "You tell me to get lost, like, all the time though."

" Affectionately ." Blake smiles, laying back down next to Yang on her stomach while she kicks her feet. " Jokingly ," She adds with a laugh, just in case the first one was too big of a leap.

Yang grins. "Mm, I see." Her eyebrows raise, an arm worming its way under Blake's neck to act as a pillow. She accepts it without a word, laying her head back down in the space that's created for her.

An idea pops into mind, Yang's grin only growing wider. "Hey, Blake?" She starts, and Blake adjusts herself so she can gaze up at her. Then, she puts on the best dramatic voice she has thus far. "I'm feeling sooooooo insecure about my bluntness last night. Why don't you talk about it some more? Maybe sprinkle some compliments in here and–"

Blake pushes back, playfully (and gently) punching Yang, who catches the smile that's on her face. She can try to hide it with her hair all she likes, but it was there!

"Gods, you are so–" Blake sits up, hands covering her face as she stifles a laugh. Try as she might, her ears will always give her away; they're not down, so Yang must've done something right.

She pushes up, sitting cross-legged in front of her, leaning forward bravely, merely a few inches from where Blake's hands cover her face.

There isn't a single voice in Yang's head telling her not to fuck it up right now. She can't fuck if up if she never even tries.

" Blakey ," She continues, grinning still, a slight warmth to her cheeks – more than usual. "C'mon, you can't hide behind there forever."

Another stifled laugh. Yang believes she's laughing at her jokes, her playfulness– Blake, on the other hand, is trying desperately to hide her giddy laughter and the giveaway blush.

Don't fuck it up. Don't leap.

She breathes. In for five. Out for five. She lowers her hands, smiling, but not all that flushed now.

"There she is." Yang jokes again, just getting another playful push which just sends her tumbling back onto the mattress, but before she can scramble back upright–

Blake crawls over, propped up beside her, almost above her, over her, and Brothers , the way her raven-coloured locks frame her features makes the blood rush straight to Yang's face.

"For someone who's apparently so insecure about her bluntness, you really love being blunt." She's smiling, but it's not a grin filled with mischievousness, but something Yang hadn't quite seen from Blake before.

It's sweet. Cute. Well she's always been that - and pretty, and so many other things - but this smile is different, because it's directed at her. At Yang .

"Blunt in what way?" She quips, her hand hovering by Blake's waist. "Should I scowl or blush, Belladonna?"

Yang watches as her partner's eyes soften, laced with the urge to giggle at her counterpart's remark. Lilac meets gold, a beautiful scheme, meant to be.

Her hand doesn't ghost Blake's waist anymore. It's there, pressed up against the skin-tight leather of her uniform, her thumb thrumming along the folds, feeling the curve of her side – Blake's hand comes up to push away messy blonde bangs, her own thumb feeling the curve of Yang's cheek while her other hand presses softly against her bicep.

Blake smirks. "I'll let y–"

Before Blake can even finish her word, the door to the dorm flies wide open.

A voice, familiar and sweet, but not so sweet right now , booms into the room. "Wakey wakey, you two have your mission soon! I have come to collect you and escort you to the meeting hall."

Yang is too caught up staring out at the figure of Penny in the doorway looking in to realise that Blake had scampered back, sitting in the corner of the bunk with her knees pressed against her chest.

If you could call this a leap, then they'd have missed the edge.

Yang gazed over with the softest, most longing eyes – Blake doesn't meet them, instead staring off into space. She'd never talked about it explicitly, but Yang could tell she had a hard time getting close to people. After Adam, she couldn't even blame her.

It was going so well, but the yelling was what brought her back to her 'senses' , what made her shrink into the corner.

"Can you give us a minute, Penny?" Yang asks, "We can walk ourselves there, promise. We'll be there in a few."

Penny tilts her head. "Are you sure?"

Yang breathes, looking at Blake out of the corner of her eye. "Yeah."

Penny smiles in, mirroring Yang's expression. "Okay. See you there!" She beams, moving away from the door and letting it close.

The door closes behind her with a soft thump , and the two are left alone again as the thunk of Penny's footsteps grows farther away.

Immediately, Yang's attention is back on Blake.

"Blake," She speaks softly and her hand comes up, brushing against her shoulder. She flinches away, so Yang retracts it but persists with her words. "Hey, when we're back we could… y'know, get back on track if you want."

When Blake's eyes, usually sweet, honey-glazed with speckles of gold, meet Yang's – all she sees is apprehension.

Yang tries to swallow the lump in her throat. She fails.

They'd gone too fast.

She shuffles to the end of the bunk, looking out at the rest of her outfit draped over the desk chair.

"Sorry." She whispers. She doesn't know if it's to Blake or herself.

Maybe both.

—--

"Girlfriends." Yang breathes while playing with Blake's hair under her fingertips. "It's so nice, but–"

"New?" Blake finishes her sentence for her, something that isn't new. It's like they've always known the little things about each other, sometimes being able to tell what one another was thinking without even having to say it. They wouldn't have it any other way, though.

Yang hums, "Mm, yeah." Blake watches her from below, head pressed against her chest, witnessing the giddy little smile spread across her face – if a smile could be described as going from ear to ear, this would be it.

"Blake's my girlfriend," Yang beams, moving one hand up to scratch at one of Blake's ears – she can't help it – who giggles at her partner's giddiness. "I'm Blake's girlfriend!" She says as loud as she can, trying to keep it down within the small hut Jaune had built for them who-knows-how-long ago. Yang, wrapping her arms around Blake's midsection, hoists her up and so that she can pull her in quickly for a kiss, face cupped and bangs brushed aside by quick and nimble thumbs, as if they'd been ready for this, experiencing dream after dream of that exact little movement.

Pulling away, their lips barely brush as they both giggle, butterfly kisses ghosting each other's skin. Of course, Blake moves from the awkward position to properly prop herself up on her elbow.

"Gods, you're so cheesy." Blake beams, leaning in to press another quick, gentle kiss to her lover's lips. "Never change,"

"Promise." Yang presses one to her forehead, careful to move her bangs out of the way so she can feel it against her skin. She loves the way Blake always giggles slightly at the sensation of the little kisses she gives her – one of her favourite pastimes is making her laugh, and can you blame her when it makes all the butterflies in her stomach come to life each and every time she hears it?

The shorter girl is the first to move away, pecking a small kiss to her girlfriend's jaw before she does, moving back to her standard position: her head, tucked perfectly into the crook of the fiery blonde's neck.

When her hand brushes against the raven-haired girl's back to rub it for her, she feels her arch into it.

"Tired?" Yang questions, but the question is already answered for her – she knows that's a clear indicator of her girlfriend's exhaustion. That, and her slightly drooped ears.

"A little." Blake admits, moving her hand up to caress her teammate's cheek without even having to look. "I'm so happy we get to sleep in the same bed now without the… awkward morning side-eyes."

"Ugh," A hand presses against Yang's eyes out of her own embarrassment, while also trying to knead away her exhaustion. "Tell me about it."

Even when they're together and unspeaking, it's still just as comfortable as ever. They can soak in one another's presence and still the butterflies in their stomachs will never calm.

So even now, when it's silent, Yang takes her time to gaze down at her sweetheart, droopy ears fighting to stay up while her eyes don't struggle so much to stay open.

She thinks she ought to ask anyway.

"You wanna get some sleep, babe?" Yang drawls, kneading around the base of Blake's ears, wondering if it might help ease her.

"Mm, not really." She hums in response, head jerking slightly and an ear flitting. They'd talked about this, and Yang knows that means she doesn't want her near her ears, so she backs off and goes back combing through her hair instead.

Right as they're about to return to their comfortable silence, a sharp exhale through Blake's nose cuts it short.

" Babe ?" She asks curiously, and although Yang wasn't looking at her face just then, she can hear the endeared little smile. It must be contagious, because she smiles too.

Yang shuffles slightly so that she's able to press her lips to the space between her girlfriend's ears. "What? It's cute." She insists, her thumb thrumming along Blake's cheek.

Blake scoffs, but caves. "It is."

"So I take it I can call you that, then?" The blonde double-checks, just to be sure.

Although slightly flustered, Blake nods against her chest and murmurs, "Absolutely."

The taller girl hums, very content with that answer, but now her interest is piqued.

She risks it. "Could I maybe… rattle off some nicknames and you can tell me if they're good or not?"

A little giggle sounds from the shorter girl, tucked into the crook of her neck again. "Alright, go ahead, baby ."

Yang's breath catches in her throat before she can even say the first one – her fingers even stop combing through her partner's hair, so Blake definitely noticed the impact.

"I'll take that as a 'use that one, please.' " She jests, pecking another kiss to Yang's jaw. All she can do is scoff in response, knowing she'd been caught out.

"You didn't have to catch me off guard like that!"

Another opportunity. Blake leaps at it. "Oh, I'm sorry baby , go ahead." She says with that same crooned tone, as sweet as honey. Yang savours it and seals it with a kiss between her cat ears before she continues with her own name ideas.

"Mkay, just… lemme know what you think of these." Yang breathes, eyes scanning her girlfriend for ideas.

"Sweetheart?"

Blake's breathing hitches and her legs curl slightly, and Yang can definitely feel the smile up against her neck. "So that's a yes. And a yes for me, too." She hums, "Lemme tick off that box in my brain."

" Yang ," Blake whines for her to stop the jokes and keep going, patting her chest to continue as she chuckles.

"Pff, alright." Yang laughs, thinking. "Honey?"

It takes a second of thought, but Blake nods against the blonde's chest. "I like that one."

"Good, 'cause I've been thinking about that one – it matches your eyes."

Blake can't help the eyeroll, but Gods , that's sweet. She makes a mental note to press her on how long she'd been thinking up nicknames later, because the next name is already up.

"Sunshine?"

"For me? Maybe. For you? Definitely, if you're, y'know, comfortable with that." Blake turns the tables, coiling a clump of her girlfriend's wild, blonde hair around her finger.

"Definitely." Yang echoes, kissing her teammate's forehead again, eliciting a giggle. She goes through her own mental checklist again, thinking of the others she had in mind. "Uhh.. gorgeous?"

Another pause. Blake takes a second. "Mm, it's… eh," She tilts her hand in the air side to side, as if she's not so keen on the idea.

"Awe, but you are gorgeous, y'know." Yang frowns, her hand continuing to work through the little knots she finds in Blake's hair.

There's a little huff of air against the skin of her neck before she speaks, "It's not an insecurity thing or anything, sweetheart, promise . I'm just not a big fan of that one."

Yang gets it, she's not too keen on it either. "Mkay, I understand. And same here, for the record." She clarifies, thinking again. "Princess?"

"Whoa-kay." Blake laughs, legs curling again. "Maybe. Just– not now."

Yang grins. Okay, that one's going down as a special case. "What, that one get you all flustered, princess?" She nuzzles into her hair, the two fluffy ears on the top of her girlfriend's head fluttering against her cheeks, tickling them.

" Yang !" Blake laughs, pushing her face away – if you asked Yang to put a price tag on that laugh and smile, she'd call it priceless without a moment's hesitation.

That nickname goes down in the mental notes for another time. "Alright, alright." The taller girl backs off, thinking of the others she had.

She can still feel the little giggly breaths Blake is releasing against the skin of her neck, her smile pressed against her and her lips ghosting kisses.

If she could freeze time, she'd love to stay in this moment forever, just being giddy and hopelessly in love with the girl she never dreamed she could be with. After everything they've been through, everything they've overcome, she can say with certainty that she's proud of where she is – cosy in bed, with the girl she's convinced she loved since day one in her arms.

An idea comes to mind. She puts on her best dramatically seductive voice.

"What about my darling?"

It all comes crashing down.

The smile against her neck fades, and Blake isn't warm and cosy anymore, just… cold and pale .

"Not that one." She says, with a little quiver to her voice. You don't have to be smart to know you've fucked up, but for Yang, she feels like her world just split in two. Everything was going so well. They were laughing and smiling just a second ago.

"Blake?" Yang mumbles, and there's a quiver in her own voice too.

Her greatest fear has been this for quite some time now. Losing her again. She'd avoid upsetting her like it was the plague, afraid of her isolating again, shrinking in on herself or relying on no one.

Blake doesn't say anything, she just pushes herself up from the mattress.

If Yang sees her arms shake beneath her own weight, she doesn't point it out.

" Babe ," Yang croons, pushing herself up alongside her. She doesn't need to ask, instead just holding her hand out near Blake's face; to her relief, the raven-haired girl takes it, pressing her cheek into her warm palm.

Gentle. Slow. Careful. Yang thinks over the advice Blake had given her for when she gets shaken up – it's not too bad, this just caught her off guard, and it's nothing they can't handle.

Her other hand comes up, half on Blake's jawline, half on her neck so that her fingers can gently comb through some of her hair. It soothes her, she doesn't need to be told that to know .

"Sorry," Blake forces a smile, but it has so many cracks in it. "That just–"

" Shh ," Yang shushes as she hears a rising sob in Blake's throat threatening to spill out, " No apologies from you, and no buts." It's not a command or a demand, but just a statement. You don't have to. I'm not going to hurt you . You're safe with me .

Her breathing is a little uneven, but Yang knows she doesn't have to intervene with it when she watches the five seconds-long breath intake. Just like she taught her, all the way back then.

" Gods , Blake, you're… incredible , y'know that?" Her voice is filled with so much awe that it's thick with prideful tears, just getting to hold her girlfriend, press their foreheads together and close their eyes… she'd always wanted this, and now that she's here, now that she has it, she can see everything.

Every little thing about Blake that she loves. The way she pinches her brow when she's deep in thought, the way she can't hold back a smile, the little blemishes and scars left by previous battles that she gets to kiss and call pretty. The scar on her stomach that she gets to trace with her fingertips and thrum with her thumb. The little things, the way she gets all giddy about her books and invested deep into the storyline, the way she looks up at Yang when she rests on her chest and thinks she doesn't see but oh , she does .

Everything about her is so beautiful.

She breathes, says fuck it , and takes the leap.

"I'd kill before I let anyone hurt you again." There's wetness at her thumbs where she holds Blake's cheeks, and it only worsens with her words as she listens to the sharp intake of breath that turns into a small, gasped sob.

If her own tears start to fall, she doesn't say. Her voice might give it away, but she doesn't care. She'd rather let each be a testament to how much she cares about her, and the truth that she carefully weaves into each word.

Even with the tears, the gasps and the barely suppressed sobs, Blake continues to control her breathing, spurred on by praise whispered between feather-light kisses, sprinkled about her face with the most gentle, caring touch she'd ever felt.

It didn't sting, or burn. It didn't make her feel revolted after the touch was gone.

It was a touch she longed for instead, one she craved and never wanted to let go.

She had never known genuine, caring love until now. She'd just convinced herself she knew all about it when she knew nothing . What she'd felt back then wasn't love, and It had taken her so long to realise that.

When Blake's eyes open and she gazes up to meet the lavender irises that she loves to get lost in, she sees the tear tracks carved through her girlfriend's skin, and her heart drops into the pit of her stomach.

" Yang ," She breathes, cupping the blonde's face back, panic in her voice as if she'd done something wrong –

"Hey heyy , Blake, sweetheart," Yang croons, pressing their foreheads together again, "I'm okay."

But Blake shakes her head, a sob breaking free as she speaks. "You're crying ,"

"Mhm, yeah. Good observation, babe." She tries to lighten the situation, but it doesn't land like she'd hope. Though, she doesn't really care to deny the fact that she's been crying, because she's already seen it, and in any case – she could never lie to Blake. "I'm not angry or upset with you, so don't worry."

Another sob releases itself, more guttural and not at all held back anymore. "Then why?"

Blake barely ever saw Yang cry, and this must've been the longest amount of time she'd ever seen tears in her eyes before she'd turn away and pretend it never happened.

The blonde breathes in, filling her lungs before releasing it all, slowly – much longer than five seconds, but she has to compose herself so she doesn't lose her cool.

"I'm angry at him ," Yang admits, her voice cracking. "I don't know everything and I know he's gone , but… you– you know my thoughts get intrusive sometimes and just– just the idea , the thought of hurting you makes me feel sick to my stomach." Blake gazes up at Yang as she speaks, who presses little kisses into dark hair between sentences. "I don't know what he did to you, Blake, but he was fucking cruel ."

To her dismay, Yang feels Blake shake her head beneath her palms.

"Yang, I fucked up so, so many times, and–"

" Blake ," Yang pleads and her voice breaks again, "Don't, please don't," She manages to crack a small smile before her explanation, "I'd rather not activate my semblance in a hut made of wood and paper." She wipes away a few more of her girlfriend's tears, just relieved to see the small smile that her joke gets in response.

Blake breathes in for five, and out for five.

"I know I–" She starts, hiccups, and then starts again as Yang wills her on. "I know I said I'd tell you what he did eventually," Blake's voice shakes, but she's determined to get through it. "And I– I still intend to."

The blonde nods, feeling heat in her irises. She blinks again and again, hoping it'll dispel before she continues. "I love you, Blake." Straight to the point, "And that's okay, you can take all the time you need."

Blake smiles, and Yang can't help but do the same when she feels the corners of her girlfriend's mouth upturn beneath the edge of her palms.

Circling back, Blake laughs, trying to lighten the mood while her voice is still laced with sadness. "You really are my sunshine."

Yang's heart flutters, and a smile spreads across her face involuntarily. "There she is," She drawls, pressing more tender little kisses to her girlfriend's forehead, hair and face.

There isn't a lot to talk about, other than dancing around a subject that Yang knows Blake isn't ready to speak on just yet. It'd be dangerous to dwell on it, especially out of fear that the words could tumble out before they were formed.

"What do you wanna do?" Yang asks, knowing she shouldn't decide the next step for her girlfriend.

She inhales shakily, hands resting on the blonde's shoulders. "Sleep," Blake admits with an exhausted laugh.

Yang nods, feeling her conscious drifting as well. "Yeah, I think that's probably for the best. Will you be able to sleep okay?"

Another shaky inhale. "I don't know," Blake admits, "But… I know you're here if anything happens, so I think I'm okay."

Pride wells in her chest as she can't resist placing a kiss on the end of her partner's nose. "That's my girl,"

"You really are cheesy, you know that?" Blake laughs, trying to brush away the last of her tear tracks.

"And you love me for it! Too late to take it back, Belladonna. You're stuck with me." Yang beams, letting herself fall back onto the mattress, arms outstretched for Blake to climb into.

They fit together perfectly, Blake's head finding its home on Yang's chest, by her shoulder where she can press her lips sleepily against the skin of her neck. "The horror ," She murmurs sleepily with sarcasm before she gets to her comfy spot. Before she can properly settle down to rest, she peers up, placing a few kisses in succession along her girlfriend's jaw. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Good," Yang smiles into her black hair, kissing the spot between her cat ears again. When her hand moves to rub Blake's back, she instinctively arches into it like she always does – the blonde giggles, listening to the instinctive purring that Blake swears she never does –

Because she only does it when she's sleeping .

Yang peers down, viewing the tiny glint the remaining damp tear tracks creates on the girl's cheek. Her thumb wipes it away, heart warming as she watches her nuzzle into her palm.

In for five, out for five, and go slow so you don't wake her up .

"Sweet dreams, babe. I'll meet you there."

—--

It starts the same way every time.

A grip so tight it burns, stabbing into her skin like barbed wire that she can't pull loose because she's frozen there, back black and bruised and pressed against the surface with a varying amount of force, slammed down again and again every time she manages to pull herself out of her static state.

Her head thumps against the hard floor below her with each hit, groaning and whimpering at the sharp pain that runs through her head with each one – her eyes are pressed shut, tight enough that stars and sparkles appear in her darkened sight, but she'd take anything over having to look him in the face.

Especially not right now. Not when he's like this.

Contact is made and her head rolls to the side, blistering hot heat burning her cheek as his touch taints her skin. A sob involuntarily claws its way out of her throat as she kicks up her knees in an attempt to free herself, but nothing ever works. It's like she's cursed, bound to him, forced to endure this horrific cycle whenever he's even moderately pissed off, and the worst part is that it isn't even her fault .

It almost never is.

Thorns dig into her sides with each little touch, and with every little squirm or wriggle they just dig deeper and deeper . Her breath is ragged, throat dry from air being forced in and out, and his scent is so strong that her eyes sting with tears, choking on the thick scent he'd always apply. God, she hates it, she hated it, and she still can't fucking escape it. Can escape him .

Two hands pinning her down, knees balanced painfully on her thighs to stop her kicking, and a booming voice in her face and ears which ring with each reverberation of his yell.

Each touch stings, aches, burns– right up until the tiny, delicate, oh-so gentle feather-light touch that ghosts along her shoulder blades when nothing should be able to reach there.

It doesn't inflame any of the bruises or marks along her skin, but it's a touch regardless, and she jolts to get away from it, suddenly no longer pinned down, no longer bruised – not cold but warm and cosy with a veil of sweat over her forehead. Her ears still ring as her chest heaves, slowly but surely coming to and registering the echo of a honey-slick voice.

"Blake, Blake !" A familiar shade of deep blonde comes into her blurred vision, slowly focusing on it until she loses herself all over again in those lilac eyes she feels so unbelievably safe looking into – but there's another thing: her expression. Worried, her softened eyes coated in sympathy.

She had that same expression every single time this happened, and it never once showed even a hint that she was finally getting sick of the midnight terrors, the reminders, the memories– she sits through every single one, a strong, robotic hand massaging beneath her shoulder blades just like she told her forever ago that she enjoyed.

Once again, she's reigned back in, snapped out of her great realisation that she's not there , but here, safe with the kindest and most caring partner she's ever had. A polar opposite to her previous, if there ever was one.

" Heyy , sweetheart I'm here, can you look at me?" Her words are gentle, never commanding, but instead a simple ask or plea. "We're at home, babe," Yang's hands hover just by Blake's cheeks, waiting for her to prompt whether or not she's okay with touch. She caves, craving any and all touch that isn't controlling or possessive, lacing her fingers with Yang's and pressing her warm palms to dampened cheeks.

Though her eyes still seem glassy, far away, and her breathing still heaving, Yang registers that she seems more alert now, having taken her hands. "There you go," She croons, "We're gonna breathe together now, hon. Think you can handle that?"

Her lungs ache and burn. She shakes her head – she knows she can handle it, and she's never understood why she says no in the moment, but her partner once suggested it may be her repulsion for commands. It becomes far, far more bearable when Yang brings her back around with encouragement that it's not something she asks of her selfishly; but out of love, because there's nothing she'd ever make her do that would put her in harm's way.

"You can," Yang drawls, pressing their foreheads together as Blake screws her eyes shut and wills the flashing memories away, each one sending a new wave of aches and pains through her temples. "Breathing will make it all go away, yeah? We've done this before, lovely, it's easy after a few tries." The blonde presses a kiss to her forehead, despite the ickiness of the cold sweat she'd awoken in – Yang, however, couldn't care less about that; she's her girlfriend, and a bit of sweat isn't going to stop her from making her feel all better.

"I'll count us in and out," The taller girl says firmly, sitting in front of the shorter one with her hands still over her cheeks. Blake's have moved from the back of Yang's hands to the crease of her elbows, that terrified girl still yelling in the back of her mind that someone who fucks up this much should never get this lucky.

It's just like she said back on those bridges – Yang does what she says, waiting for the best break she can find in Blake's hyperventilating for her to count them in.

She fails on the first breath and the second, but by the third, the breaths are just shaky and not spilling out of her mouth with the sobs.

"Yeah, just like that," Yang smiles, "Slow and steady…" Another successful attempt, met with a proud little hum from the blonde. "There you are, see? I told you. Easy as that." Her lips press kiss after kiss against her dampened cheeks, "No problem for my brave girl."

Over the years, she'd gotten used to Yang's little terms of endearment and the whispers of praise into her drooped ears, but even if she gets used to them, she can never get over them. Each one makes her stomach flutter, more and more as the fear subsides with her girlfriend leading the march to chase it all away.

Even the little remarks she hated when they first got together have grown on her. 'My' before a nickname or just her name, especially, because it wasn't spoken out of control or possession, but as more of a brag. Look at my girlfriend, and how lucky I am to be able to call her mine .

My Blake. My teammate. My partner. My sweetheart. My girlfriend . She doesn't hate it anymore, but instead loves the way her heart feels like it could burst with joy whenever she says it.

Thinking about it all, she presses her own lips to the metallic palm that cools her feverish cheek, leaving little kisses there as her smile sends Yang's sensors off, a proud smile of her own forming.

Though her heart rate and breathing are still a little uneven, the pair know that they'll be back on track within no time.

When Blake finally brings herself to meet those lavender eyes again, she finds them filled with warmth and love, honey glaze swimming within them with those same speckles of gold they've always had when they look at one another.

There's no empty comforts or wasted time on things that might not even help, because Yang knows it differs depending on just how bad it can be.

"What can I do for you?" She speaks softly, her thumbs swiftly but gently moving to wipe away the tears that are falling down her cheeks, not out of fear, but joy. Relief, too.

"Don't go," Blake breathes, her hands moving away from the crease of her girlfriend's elbows, a tiny gesture that begs her not to let go of her.

"Never." Yang speaks, gently tugging Blake forward – she concedes immediately, falling into her embrace and melting into her comfy spot against her partner's neck, newly sprung tears leaving little splotches on her bed shirt.

Her fingers work with care, kneading the tense spots beneath each of her shoulder blades while she rocks them back and forth in a steady rhythm.

For having such a fiery heart, Yang's is the calmest between them in this moment – it's like nothing has happened, like this doesn't even bother her because when Blake's ears flutter to her pulse, she's lulled by the beat.

Tender whispers by her ears remind her to breathe whenever an image flashes and it picks up again, delicate butterfly kisses sprinkled along her hair with each five-count.

Feeling soothed enough, Blake is the first to push back slowly, moving up to peck a grateful kiss to Yang's soft yet partially chapped lips. The words don't have to be spoken, but the gesture of tucking a loose clump of Black hair back into place says you're welcome enough.

Yang's left hand moves from her cheek to press against Blake's forehead, feeling the warmth radiating beneath her palm, and the cold sweat her dream caused.

"How do you feel?" She asks, eyes still softened and sympathetic, situated right below her knitted brows.

It's as if the question sparks Blake's nerves alive, because she hadn't already registered the wave of nausea that sits low in the pit of her stomach. Anxiety nausea, if anything, because she tended to get it when her night terrors were bad … that doesn't make it any less annoying.

" Sick ," Blake chokes out, voice dry and hoarse. Yang's quick to nod, fingers carding through her hair soothingly.

Her eyes look to her nightstand, where she always keeps a cup of water. A little straw bobs up and down as she moves to crawl slightly and grab it, turning around and bringing it back to her lover.

"Small sips, okay?" Yang holds the cup closer so that the straw brushes against her girlfriend's lips. She takes it, taking small sips just as instructed until she feels satisfied and her throat doesn't feel so dry.

Placing the cup on the nightstand and crawling back, Yang's hand begins to rub delicately at Blake's side, being cautious due to the nausea she mentioned.

Yang breaks the silence again after a few moments. "You wanna talk about it?"

Blake weighs her options.

It's not like before. Yang knows everything there is to know about Adam, about what he did, now. Some time ago, after a moment just like this, she had regarded that she felt as though talking about her nightmares just led her round in circles pointlessly, dwelling on something she hates anyway. But, ever the optimist, Yang had looked at it so differently; an opportunity to become used to it. More comfortable talking about it. With each night she'd recount the happenings of her dreams, her voice would waver less and feel less like she was going to choke on her words.

The name Adam wasn't a word that burned her tongue anymore, but one she could speak alongside an eye roll and a scoff. The weight of his impact stays, but she has the knowledge that that impact can never worsen . His grip can never burn her again.

She nods and decides it may be best to talk about it, but she can't when she feels as though opening her mouth for a single second will make her vomit .

"I want to, but…" Blake releases a breath, the one you do when you're holding back nausea.

Yang nods, "Anything I can get you?" Her voice is so sweet like it's coated in syrup. Gods, she's so lucky.

Wordlessly, Blake takes the opportunity, her fingers pulling her girlfriend's chin towards her, stealing a kiss that lingers for a moment, neither wanting to pull away.

When they do, the first thing Yang's attention flies to (bar the moment the blood had rushed to her face), is the fact that Blake's skin isn't as fever-flushed anymore, but paler and cold . The adrenaline of the dream had worn off, and her body was just now readjusting.

Blake's holding on to Yang, though, which makes it hard for the blonde to ask: "Will you let me go grab you a snack?" When the raven-haired girl's sight drifts and she seems iffy about the idea, Yang reiterates, "Just something plain. Toast or something, and I'll grab some too."

That works to put her at ease – before long, Blake is sitting on the kitchen counter watching Yang busy herself with slotting two slices of bread in the toaster. When the button is pressed all the way down, the blonde heads straight to her girlfriend, a hand snaking around her waist while the other pulls her head down to press a kiss to her lips.

Pulling back, breath brushing one another's lips, Yang decides to ask a question again. "How're you feeling now, sweetheart?" Just like every single question before that one, it's weaved with so much care and spoken with so much warmth that Blake is convinced she could cut butter with her words.

"M'okay," Blake breathes against her partner's skin – she sees right through it.

Yang laughs, her thumb tracing the upturned corner of Blake's lips. "You gotta try to be at least a little convincing if you're gonna lie to me, babe." She giggles a little, pressing their foreheads together with a contented sigh. "C'mon, what's up?"

Feeling another wave of nausea wash over her, Blake tilts her head up and inhales shakily through gritted teeth. Yang slots her head right under her chin, offering her the chance to rest her head on top of her own. The reminder to breathe is repeated against her chest. She does.

Another breath goes by before Blake finds her words, listening to the gentle buzz of the toaster's heater. "I'm– in my head," She starts, "I feel… a lot better."

"Mm," Yang hums, "Just sickness?" She didn't even have to tell her, she already knows it still lingers just by how she acts – she knows her girlfriend so well.

Blake hums back in response, kissing into Yang's wild bed hair. She continues to breathe through her teeth and out of her nose, while her partner tries to avoid rubbing her back and making it worse.

"With any hope, it might be 'cause you're running on an empty stomach." Yang pulls back, her hands running from Blake's biceps down to her fingertips, lingering for a moment as their toast pops up with the chime of the toaster, the raven-haired girl's ears flitting to the sound. "Or if not, at least you'll have something to line your stomach with."

Although Blake doesn't really feel up to eating anything due to the nausea, she's willing to try knowing that Yang is going to be eating alongside her.

Too deep in thought, Blake doesn't notice how quickly Yang has prepared her own slice of toast with a layer of cream cheese. When it comes to her partner's slice, she turns to her and gives her thigh a little squeeze to get her attention.

"What do you want on yours?" Yang drawls, her thumb running back and forth along the hemline of her girlfriend's shorts soothingly.

Blake referees the fight between wanting nothing on it and wanting something quite plain, eventually caving when Yang moves to reach into the fridge, pulling out the tub.

"Just… yeah, butter is fine. Not too much," Blake clarifies, watching as Yang moves to butter the bread as if she already knew what her answer would be.

"Just the way you like it," Yang adds, "Don't worry."

Yang does make the best breakfast – she has to admit that. Out of the pair, the fiery one is by far the best cook. Blake is the one that triumphs when it comes to baking.

This wasn't the first night they'd spent like this. Nights where she'd run cold the moment she didn't have Yang there as a safety blanket to reel her back to reality. Nights where they'd make midnight breakfast for whichever was having a difficult time.

When they sit down at the dining table, letting the moonlight illuminate the surface, they both begin to tuck into their toast.

At first, Yang eats like it was the first time she'd ever eaten, but when she notices Blake's slow, nausea-fuelled nibbles, she decides to match her pace.

If Blake could feel her girlfriend's eyes digging into her, she doesn't mention it.

One takes a bite and shivers, while the other takes a bite and furrows their brows with sympathy.

With each passing bite, however, Blake finds the food becoming easier to stomach. Yang, across from her, notices the colour returning to her partner's cheeks, smiling softly to herself as she takes another bite.

Yang finishes first, Blake a little behind – without missing a beat, the taller girl stands and places her plate on top of her girlfriend's, pecking a kiss between her ears and wrapping her arms around her shoulders, pulling her into a small, warm embrace.

"You're so strong, y'know that?" It doesn't take any words for Yang to know what Blake thinks of that statement, especially considering the little sigh she lets out once she hears it. "I know you don't quite believe that yet, Blakey, but I'm telling you from an outside perspective… therefore I'm right."

Blake laughs at that, "That so?" She raises her brows, "Then I'm telling you from an outside perspective to put on some deodorant."

With a scoff, Yang places another kiss into Blake's hair and picks up the plates on the table, "You wound me," She says dramatically, "But you also love me."

Another laugh, "You got me… I do." Blake admits, twisting in her chair to watch Yang place the plates into the sink to wash in the morning. "And… hey , thank you, love." She murmurs, watching as the blonde sorts the dirty cups by the sink in  ascending order.

"Don't mention it." Yang calls back over her shoulder, dusting the last few breadcrumbs from the plates off of her hands. Exiting the kitchen archway, she reapproaches the raven-haired woman. "Do you feel like heading back to bed?" She brushes her hand along Blake's shoulder, "Or… do you wanna talk about anything?"

The Faunus' ears droop, thinking back to before they had opted to get some food. Noticing the shift in attitude, Yang crouches down by Blake's legs, taking her hands in her own. "Hey," She croons, "You can talk to me, sweetheart."

Each little brush of fingertips sends a fluttery sensation through Blake's body, and she can't help but think of the bad as it simply is – in the past .

When she meets Yang's eyes again, she watches in real time as the blonde's eyes soften and brows furrow, a hand coming up to cup her cheek and brush away a tear she didn't even know had fallen.

" Heyy , Blake? You here with me, love?" Once again, she reigns her back in, giving her hand a gentle squeeze to ground her.

Blake hums with a nod, "Mm," Squeezing Yang's hand back, she breathes in for five, and out for five. "I Just– when I woke up earlier, I was so scared," She admits, her voice breaking beneath the weight of her words. All the while, Yang is right there, listening and taking in every single one. "But then you were there, and I was suddenly wondering… 'what was I even scared of just now'?" She sobs up a giggle, trying to keep things light-hearted considering she's not so fearful anymore. Plus, Yang has always been the first to lighten a situation. "It just felt so… odd. I remember the first time you found me having a nightmare. I was petrified from the dream and… terrified you were going to treat me differently." Her heart flutters in her chest, meeting Yang's eyes to find them glinting with awe and love. "But you didn't… My skin crawled, and I didn't even realise it had stopped until you were already holding me."

A smile spreads across her face, running the pads of her thumbs along Yang's knuckles, feeling the difference between bone and ball joints.

"Back then, hoping – no, even just the idea of a future where I wasn't so scared anymore was so unbelievable that it never crossed my mind for a second ." Blake drinks in the lovestruck expression on her girlfriend's face, "But you've made it all possible," Her hands come up to cup her partner's face, tracing Yang's cheekbones with her thumbs. "And I know I'll still be scared, it'll still follow me, it'll never fully leave me– that"s just… what it's like. But I at least know that you'll be by my side. You… really are an extraordinary person."

Blake feels wetness beginning to pool under the pads of her thumbs and when she looks, she finds Yang a blubbering mess .

"Shit– oh, Yang , I didn't mean to–"

Yang shakes her head, leaning into the warmth of her partner's palms. "No, it– it's not like that," She dismisses Blake's worry, smiling into her hands. "I'm not upset… the opposite, actually!" Lacing their fingers together, she lowers their hands and begins to sprinkle kisses along her girlfriend's knuckles. "If you seriously think I could be mad at you after that… Well, that's a whole other conversation." Her fingers trace every little indentation in her skin, eyes following the swirl of her fingerprints.

"I just– I'm so happy," The words come out with a laugh, so sunny and bright. "I've watched you open up more and more, and I feel like my heart is gonna burst every time, I swear, 'cause you just keep getting stronger and stronger." There's a pause as Yang's eyes follow a scar along the palm of Blake's hand, leaning in without a second thought to press her lips to it, just as she has a thousand times before. When she moves back, she continues. "I've always hoped there would be a time where you weren't so scared, and here we are… not just because of me, though, you seriously need to give yourself some credit, Blake."

Blake nods, her heart bursting with love. A laugh bubbles in her throat, trying to mask the joyful tears that stream down her cheeks. "I adore you," She giggles, "You always know what to say. Seriously, how do you do that?"

Yang raises her brows, offering her girlfriend a wink while she continues to trace shapes into her palms. "I guess after years of dancing around what I actually wanted to say, I stopped overthinking it and started trusting that you'd love me regardless, even if I fucked it up." She shrugs, feeling a laugh bubbling in her own throat. "Plus, you already tease me by calling me cheesy, but I know you actually love it, so… I don't mind saying cheesy things more often, because I know it makes you laugh."

The most undeniable Yang reasoning if she ever did hear it.

Leaning forward, Blake presses their foreheads together with a hum and a smile. "I can't even argue with that," She admits, only moving away to kiss Yang's forehead through her bed-ruffled bangs.

The kiss sparks a wave of warmth in her heart, standing up just to cup her girlfriend's face and pepper kisses all over it.

" Yang !" Blake laughs, trying to push the blonde away when the kisses start to tickle.

She doesn't falter, though – she keeps going until she's satisfied, making sure the last kiss meets Blake's lips, as soft, sweet and euphoric as their first ever.

When they separate, Yang spies the slight droop of Blake's ears, weighed down by exhaustion. She can't even blame her – by now, she's also feeling the lack of sleep in the heaviness of her own shoulders.

"What do you say we get back to bed, and we can maybe pick this back up in the morning?" Yang suggests, making sure to wipe away the last few traces of her sweetheart's previous tears.

Standing, Blake makes her best attempt to stifle her incoming yawn by nuzzling into the crook of Yang's neck. The only word that comes out is " Please ," alongside a content, comfy sigh.

"Alright, Just– don't fall asleep standing up. C'mon, sleepyhead." Yang kisses the spot between the Faunus' pinched outbrows to un-pinch them, taking her hand and beginning to lead her towards the stairs.

Back up in their shared bedroom, Yang doesn't hesitate to sprawl out on the bed, arms open wide for her other half to collapse into; Blake, too, wastes no time finding her home by resting against the blonde's chest.

With the heel of her palm, Yang gently kneads the base of the raven-haired girl's ears, something she's far more comfortable with her doing now. It soothes her immediately, Blake's body weight melting into her counterpart.

"Get some rest, lovely." Yang croons, "I'll be right here if you wake up."

"The same to you, too… don't be scared to wake me up, sunshine." Blake reaches up just to caress Yang's cheek for a moment, before her girlfriend willingly places Blake's hand back into a more comfortable position to sleep in.

Smiling softly, Yang nods. "I will if I gotta. I promise." Moving from her ears, she cards her fingers through Blake's black strands, moving down to massage below her shoulder blades and trace shapes into the small of her back. "Sweet dreams, Blake." She drawls, "I'll meet you there."

"Don't be late." Blake quips.

Laughing with a sharp exhale from her nose, Yang makes a little noise of acknowledgement. "For you? Never."

It isn't long before Blake completely relaxes in her girlfriend's embrace, Yang's heart bursting when she feels her stir only to nuzzle further into her hold.

"How'd I get so lucky?" The blonde whispers, running her fingers through Blake's hair again. "I love you… I love you," She hums, "Try not to get too tired of me saying that, 'cause I'm gonna tell you that every day for the rest of our lives." She pecks a kiss between her girlfriend's ears, smiling happily when they flutter.

She snuggles into her hair, breathing in the familiar scent. "Sorry," She murmurs, "I'm probably late to our dream-date by now, aren't I?" Yang smiles, "Alright.. night-night, sweetheart. I'll pay for the dream dinner-date to make up for it. Promise."