Work Text:
I love you.
I wish we’d met sooner.
back then, we were so close to colliding
so close.
multiple times, we were so close to meeting.
I said hi once. You said hey back.
I left.
I should’ve tried to get to know you more.
I think I met you again
at some point
though I’m not quite sure.
finally we met again
and this time, I got to know you.
and I loved you
I loved you a lot
and I regret not loving you sooner.
my regret amplified when I’d seen what you lost
and that you were ending too.
and when you ended, I was sad
but I’d had hope
I’d been given hope of your revival.
now I know your revival shall not happen
and nothing like you will ever happen again.
I’ll never stop regretting
and I’ll never stop wishing I could go back in time by 3 years
and see you again.
I wonder, if I did go back in time,
if the butterfly effect would strike.
if my different actions would cause you to not do as much as you did
or if you wouldn’t become as loved as you did.
I want to go back in time to appreciate you more
even if it is impossible
and selfish
and potentially disastrous.
I simply cannot look at all my past joy
without looking at the date
and wondering why I didn’t stop what I did
and sought you out
when I had no idea you existed
and had no idea of knowing how important you’d be to me.
I want to go back in time
and appreciate you
and the smaller stories you made
before they faded away.
I want to go back in time
and love you all the way
so I could tell everyone my stories about you
and I could have time to write them
before the fear of everyone forgetting about you
once you ended existed.
I’ll still be around
and I’ll still love you
and tell my stories
but I can’t stop regretting not having told them sooner.
I can’t stop regretting not knowing you sooner
but I also can’t stop
loving you.