Work Text:
He should probably get up and get something to eat, but he doesn’t have the energy right now. Sitting by the heater wrapped in his favorite blanket was comfortable. Even if it has been hours...
A week ago, Hiyori said he’d be leaving for a day or two. He said he’d be back soon and not to worry while he was gone. Shin didn’t quite catch what it was for but figured it was probably work-related. He didn’t dwell on that part though, at least not as much as how Hiyori said it’d be a few days even though it’s been a full week! Surely Hiyori didn’t lie to him. He had never lied to Shin before, anyways. At best, he’s bent the truth a little. It’s just that a five day difference was something to note as out of the ordinary.
Shin should do something to keep his mind off things. He glances out the window and is met with a warm-colored sunset. There must be people out there on a day as pretty as this. Maybe parents taking their kids out, or there are couples on dates. And here he was, alone in a shared apartment. Without even the motivation to stand up and stare out of the window at all the assumed people below. Then he remembers that sunsets don’t occur in the middle of the day. Another day has gone by. Hiyori’s still not home.
Still with his blanket around him, he gets up to find his phone and check for any new messages. The last time he remembers messaging his friend was a few days ago, and the last time he checked, he still hadn’t responded. He stops at the kitchen and spots his phone on the counter, deciding that while he’s here, he should at least get some water. Turning the phone on, there are no texts he received from his friend. Only a few emails he doesn’t bother reading in full.
While taking a cup from the cupboard he thinks about what to do tomorrow. Today was wasted basking in the warmth of the heater and the coldness of an empty room. It’s what he did yesterday, too, though. Filling the cup with tap water, he tells himself that he should get back to coding. He doesn’t have to make anything complex, but it’s a hobby he enjoys. That should make him feel better, right? He sighs to himself and takes a sip of water. If that’s happening tomorrow, he can still spend the rest of today by the heater.
He brings the cup back to their shared computer room, gradually drinking it sip by sip. By the time he’s settled close to the heater, he’s drank almost half the cup already. Geez, just how thirsty was he? It’s not like his mouth was so dry before he got water. Or maybe he hadn’t noticed?
Or was he ignoring it? Maybe....
Thinking about it, he’s pretty hungry, too. What had he even eaten today? He can’t remember. But, he might have just forgotten. Surely he’s eaten something. Surely he made soup this morning. It was just so quick that he can’t remember. That had to be it! But even if he had eaten, god, he needed food. He could only think of how hungry he was now, after he started thinking about it.
After gulping down his water, he realizes there’s no more to drink. Seems he was that thirsty. He doesn’t get up to get more, though. Instead, he places his cup down and sits there. He feels too terrible to get up.
But why?
It’s not like he’s never been alone before. Most of his life he was. Although, after befriending Hiyori, it kind of feels like he’s never alone. Like there’s always someone there, whether he wants there to be or not. It gets annoying at times, yeah, especially for an introvert like him who values his alone time. But it also became comforting. Having the person you cherish most care about you back is an amazing thing. Being there for Shin no matter what was his way of showing he cared. None of Shin’s other friends paid attention to him as much as Hiyori had. And they’d never spent as much time with him as he had.
But still. He’s used to being alone; he even handled the first few days Hiyori was gone like barely anything had changed! Why now was he being so melancholic? He’s only been gone for a week. Well, not gone gone.
At least, Shin hopes.
Shin’s sure he’s not the least annoying person in the world. He tries his best to be kind to everyone, but he’s sure people would find him irritating if they’d stuck around him long enough. What if Hiyori finally realized this? What if all those years together meant nothing to him? Maybe he didn’t go on some business trip but instead was trying to get away from Shin? It’s not a really rational thought, considering how much time they’ve spent together. But there’s still that sliver of maybes and what ifs. How would Shin know? It’s not like he’s responding to his texts. He could be ignoring them on purpose. What if Hiyori never comes back? Would he at least meet up with Shin and tell it to his face? Or would he just call him and say he never wants to see him again?
He feels tears fall on his face and wipes them away as soon as they come. Why is there a lump in his throat? Why is he crying? Because he messed up his relationship with the one person who cares about him the most? Calm down… Hiyori might have just been really busy. Maybe he just doesn’t have the time to respond. But even so. It hurts knowing that every time Shin looks at his phone, Hiyori doesn’t bother to even text back how he’s doing. An ‘Okay’ or ‘Fine’ is good enough at this point, but there’s just. Nothing.
More tears run down his cheeks. He sniffles and tries to stop before he starts sobbing. His throat feels dry, which isn’t helped by his empty stomach. His shirt sleeves are getting wetter with more tears as they keep coming. His blanket stays unused around him; he would never want to dirty something Hiyori had gifted him, especially not with ugly, unfounded tears. He cries some more, unable to control some sniffles and hiccups. He just feels.. He... feels so..-
“Good evening, Shin!”
Shin’s head jerks up and he stares at his friend. When did Hiyori get in? He didn’t hear anything. Was he too involved in his thoughts?
“Ah-.. Hiyori...”
He had obviously noticed Shin’s distress as soon as their eyes met.
Hiyori smiled, “What’s the matter? Are you that upset to see me?”
Even while feeling like crap, Shin managed to give a smile in return. It felt nice for his friend to be back, despite his lackluster attempt to cheer him up.
He stood up and timidly walked over to Hiyori, still breathing shakily and trying to wipe tears from his eyes. “Sorry for-... Sorry..”
Hiyori tilted his head at Shin. “Sorry? For what?”
Shin looked to the side. He felt guilty about exaggerating Hiyori’s absence even though that wasn’t the case. But he probably won’t tell him that.
He smiled wider, “I kept the heater at max the entire week you were gone.”
“Shin!” Hiyori responded with phony anger and mild genuine concern.
Ah.. It felt good for him to be back. He felt so incomplete without Hiyori here. He felt like something important was taken from him. Or rather, it felt like something important walked away..
He felt arms pulling him into a loose hug. “Well, I’m sorry about taking so long. I was told it was just an important meeting, but there was muuuch more than that. I was too focused on work and barely even got on my phone. Sorry if I missed anything.”
He was right, then. A little bit. He was too busy to respond to him. And he didn’t even use his phone much. Of course, they could just be excuses. What if he was lying right now?
...It doesn’t matter. He’s here now. That’s all I care about.
Shin steps closer and puts his arms around Hiyori.
They stood there, unmoving for a while.
“I missed you, Hiyori.”
“I missed you, too, Shin.”