Chapter Text
My name is Haru Mori. Yes, my parents decided naming a boy like me “spring forest” was a good idea, although I have no clue why. But they’re strange like that, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.
Despite my…beautiful name, I’m what most people would call an Otaku. No, I’m not one of those guys who stalks high school girls or does it to 2D chicks. Honestly, those kinds of people should just disappear into a hole somewhere. They give the rest of us a bad name. I just like anime more than most people, that’s all . Well, maybe a lot more than most people, but hey, who’s to judge? I won’t go so far as to wear an anime shirt in public, for fear of being called childish, but take one look in my room and you’ll find enough dirt on me to bury my body six feet under.
Speaking of people coming into my room, I hear a knock on the door and, without waiting for my answer, my mom sticks her head in.
“Package delivery~!” she sings happily, stepping fully in and holding out a small box.
“Yes!” I drop my book, leap off my bed and rush over, yanking it from her grasp. “Thanks, mom! Bye!”
She laughs and closes the door gently as I rip open the package and pull out a single DVD with a picture of a pink haired girl surrounded by four tall boys, each with a simple characteristic that makes it easy to fit them into “dere” types. I scan over them, although I’ve already stared deep into their soulful eyes for hours when I ordered the game.
Akio, Haruka, Ichiro, and Junpei. My four beautiful boys. I bring the DVD up to my forehead, pressing it against my skin. It feels cold and soothing, slowly soaking up the heat from my body. Unlike most guys, I don’t care about the female protagonist, with her perfect red lips and perfect pink hair. I just wish I could be in her place. God, I just want to date any of these boys.
With Akio we could work out together and I could watch his muscles strain under a thin, sweat soaked shirt. We’d challenge each other to see who could lift the heaviest weights or run the fastest, and after a while we’d both collapse on the floor, panting from exhaustion. And that’s when his fingers reach out to mine and we’d comfortably hold each other’s hands like it was a normal occurrence.
With Haruka we could visit an ice skating rink, speeding around or just gliding and talking for hours. Since I know nothing about ice skating, I’d fall but he’d speed up to catch me and we’d both tumble to the cold ice, faces centimeters from each other, hot breath turning to steam in the freezing air.
With Ichiro we could play board games with each other, laughing into the night. At first he’d be all serious as usual, but after a few hours his tough demeanor would crack and I’d see the true him. I’d tell him he should smile more and he would flush and mutter that he’d try.
With Junpei we could visit a cherry blossom garden together, and we’d sit on a pink covered bench as he slowly, perhaps unconsciously, scoots closer to me, blushing profusely. And after a while, our fingers would brush and as he starts to pull away I’d hold his hand tightly, making his face light up bright red and he’d stammer awkwardly. Maybe I could even feel his heart pound through our connected fingers.
I can feel my own heart pound just thinking about it. I need to calm down. I need to get a life. No, but why get a new life when I’m so happy with the one I have? I don’t need real boys to make me happy. Sushi, my family, and the boys in my games. As long as I have these three things, I’ll be happy and healthy. I don’t care about looking presentable or talking right or looking manly at school or outside the house at all. I have a few close friends, and that’s all I need.
I don’t need real romance.
I sigh, standing and stretching before my long gaming session. I know there’s no point, since Akio, Haruka, Ichiro, and Junpei can’t see me, but I walk to my full length mirror and run a hand through my medium length dark hair. I stand around 5’5, with deep green, almost emerald colored eyes and a tired expression irremovable from my face. It must be from the many, many sleepless nights I’ve had, staying up to play dating sims or other games.
Walking back to my spot in front of the TV, I open the case, take out the DVD, and slip it in where it belongs. Then I settle down on the carpet, legs crossed, and wait, breath baited.
“Our faces inches from each other, I feel his hot breath on my cheek as we stare into each other’s eyes, both of us shocked at the situation we’re in. How did I even get here!?”
I nod along. It sounds like the protagonist and one of the boy’s will end up on top of each other, probably with her on the bottom. I sigh wistfully, wishing again that I could be in her position. I don’t mind being on the bottom, and I’m not embarrassed to admit that.
The game opens up, finally showing the characters, but something’s wrong. Is it the eyes being too close together? The nose being too low? The smile being too wide? No, it’s all those things combined! What happened to my boys!?
I glance at the cover of the DVD case, then back to the game. They’re completely different! Did I really spend thirty bucks on a knockoff?
Trying to contain my anger, I take a deep breath and press “start” on the controller. Might as well play it to pass the time. The site said no returns which, now that I’m thinking about it, was a huge red flag, so it’s not like I can get rid of it.
“Alright, you better have some value or I swear to God I’m going to smash you with a hammer,” I warn the game. “Got it?”
“Loud and clear!” a squeaky voice replies, and I jump a good three feet into the air, pulling muscles in my legs I never knew I had and falling onto my back.
“What the—” I grunt, sitting back up and looking around the room for my mom or my dad, or maybe Emi Tsukumo, my best friend, to be pranking me but my room is as it’s always been; covered in anime merch but lacking a family member. But when I turn back to the screen I’m horrified to see a small yellow…egg…thing(?) clambering out of it.
It wears a purple, star patterned cape and wizard’s hat, and holds a star wand with two leaves on it. Its arms and legs are skinny and gangly, like a diseased beetle.
I’m dreaming. I have to be. Wow, I’ve never had a lucid dream before. I look around the room again, making sure everything looks the same. Man, if I’m going to lucid dream, my brain should at least make it interesting. This is just my normal everyday routine, minus the floating egg that’s staring at me as if waiting for something.
When it notices me looking at it, it bows the best an egg can and announces, “I’m Kiki! Great to meet you, Haru!”
“Oh…You know my name.” It makes sense that characters in my dream would know my name, I guess…
“You’re not surprised?” the egg asks, confused.
“Oh, don’t worry,” I assure it. “This is just a dream. Sorry, but you’re a character in my—OW!”
The creature flies forward at full speed, raising the magic wand it’s suddenly holding to whack me in the eyebrow. I instinctively swat at it, sending it flying onto my bed.
“What the hell was that!?” I jump to my feet and run over, grabbing the creature before it can get away and lifting it with both hands. “What’s wrong with you!? No, I guess the question is what’s wrong with me for dreaming this.”
“Still sure you’re dreaming?” The egg points its wand at the painful spot on my forehead. I blink, releasing it. It floats in the air, watching me as I carefully poke my eyebrow, wincing at the pain that sends through my head. The pain that definitely feels real.
“Then why…” I turn back to the floating yellow egg creature currently in my room after crawling out of my TV. “You…WAIT—WHAT THE—”
“I am Kiki,” the creature repeats. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Haru. I hope we get along.”
“G-Get along?” I stare at it, my brain slowly accepting that I’m either dead or somehow living in an anime myself. “Why? What do you want?”
“I want to help you!” It extends a tiny hand to me and I breathlessly shake it. “Help you with your love life, that is.”
“My love life?” I pull away quickly. “What’s so wrong with my love life that I’m being visited by a magical flying egg?”
“Egg!?” It looks incredibly insulted for a moment, then regains its cool. “I’m afraid I can’t disclose any information about myself, other than that I am not an egg.”
“What do you want?” I repeat, quickly becoming annoyed.
“You are my first test subject!” it announces. “I’m going to make your life like one of your favorite Otome games!”
“What!?”
“You heard me right, you’re about to live your fantasy!”
Live… in one of my games? What, with cute girls attacking me non stop for attention? “Wait, wait.” I put my hands up, trying to stop it. “I don’t want that. I’m happy living like this.”
“But imagine—”
“No!” I groan loudly. “You’re not listening to me! Please leave me alone!”
An evil smile crosses its face and it snickers to itself. “I’m afraid I don’t have to do that.”
“And why not?”
“You signed up for this! The moment you pressed play you agreed to all my terms and conditions!”
I’m in shock. Am I really going to be living in one of my games? Doesn’t this thing know I’m not into harems of chicks? Although telling an egg I just met that I’m not straight feels more than a little embarrassing.
“All I want is to watch happy teenage romance!” Kiki squeals happily, spinning around in the air.
“Listen,” I mutter, “I’m not going to—”
“Oh, and to help you with that…” Kiki snaps its tiny fingers and my door swings open, my mother poking her head in.
“Haru?”
“Ah—!” I wave my hands in the air, trying to cover up Kiki, and she stares at me strangely.
“Is that a new…anime dance?”
“What?” I freeze, look towards Kiki, then back to my mom.
“She can’t see me,” The creature informs me, a little too late.
“Haru…?”
“Sorry! What? Nothing!” I yelp.
“Oh good.” She takes a deep breath, then sighs it out, meaning bad news is coming. “Listen, I have something to tell you.”
“What?” It can’t be too bad. After all, she’s always been slightly overdramatic—
“Your father and I are moving to America.”
What. I stare at her, my brain not processing the words yet. She’s joking, right? She has to be, otherwise…no, there is no otherwise. There’s no way they’d leave me to live on my own—
“We think you’re old enough to live on your own, and your father got a transfer, so we thought we’d take this opportunity to travel abroad.” She grins excitedly, adding, “I’m gonna go pack,” before closing the door with a click, leaving me shocked and almost alone aside from my new flying friend.
“We need you to be completely focused on love,” Kiki informs me seriously. “So I’ve removed all your family, your games, and your sushi. This way—”
I rush to my game cabinet, yanking open the doors to find it completely empty inside. Horrified, I run to my mini fridge where I’ve left sushi from last night, but that’s gone as well.
“You sadistic monster!” I yell, grabbing it and pinning it to the ground. “Turn it back to the way it was! Give me back my games! My sushi! My mom and dad!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that until I see some actual action around here,” Kiki laughs evilly. “So go out and find some love interests!”
“No way!” I toss it aside, hearing it hit the wall with a squeak like a dog toy, but not caring as I rush down the stairs. Just as I reach the bottom floor my mom walks out of the kitchen, dragging behind her a blue rolling suitcase. She jumps back and I freeze on the second to last stair.
“Don’t worry, mom.” I give her what I hope is a confident smile. “I’ll fix this. All of this.”
She nods hesitantly, confused. “Okay? I’m glad you’ll be fine here alone then.”
“Uh…” That’s not really what I was trying to say. “You’re leaving already? It's been like five minutes.”
She laughs airily. “What can I say? We pack fast!”
My dad comes out of the kitchen with a matching suitcase, waves to me, and walks out the door.
“See you in a few years!” My mom nods to me and follows my father, really leaving me alone this time.