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They ran, hand and hand through the fog and the sand, back to reality. They ran, away from the archives, down the steps and onto the street they went straight to their banks emptying their accounts, they knew there was no sense in keeping money in them any longer. They made it to Jon’s flat and he packed just what he could easily carry in a backpack, watching Martin the whole time he moved around picking up and rolling clothes, grabbing toothbrush, hair elastics, and a brush. He touched Martin urging him to move back to the door so they could leave and continue on towards his flat.
They ran, onwards to the tube, Martin keeping as close as he could to Jon, maintaining contact at all times. Jon held his hand tight and kept in front of him, shielding him from all the people in the underground. They got off a few stops early, Martin had tugged on Jon’s sleeve and silently motioned for the door, Jon Knew he needed to leave the claustrophobic train, it’s noise and smells and lights and the concrete above pressing down, they ran out of the tube station and back to the street, they ran to Martin’s flat where Martin unlocked the door and slid inside.
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Jon could hear Martin rummaging around his bedroom, the sound of a closet opening and then closing, a drawer sliding open and shut. Footsteps into the hallway to the bathroom and then back to the bedroom. Jon was tense and fighting to urge to Know what Martin was packing, to Know how he was and check in on a deep level to make sure he had made it out of the Lonely with no lasting harm. His phone rang and Jon jumped off the couch at the sound. He checked the ID and quickly picked the call up, it was Basira.
“Jon, are you there? You have Martin with you?”
“Yes, he’s here, he’s with me - are you alright? Daisy? Is Daisy … with you?”
There was a silence that felt charged and heavy after he asked. Jon walked a path from one side of the room waiting.
“No. No Jon, she’s not with me. I can’t -”
“Basira, I’m sorry.”
“Shut it Jon. It’s not why I called, I wanted to make sure you two were out - if you hadn’t gotten him out - it would be for nothing..” She took a sharp breath and started again, “listen Daisy had a place she could run to, it’s small but it’s safe and secluded. Somewhere you two can lay low for awhile, at least until we can figure out what to do from here.”
“Basira - I… Thank you but, I don’t know if I can leave, I - need the statements…”
“I know that Jon, I’ll meet you and Martin in twenty mins at his flat, I’m assuming you went there?”
“Right, yes … yes we’re packing.”
“Smart good thinking Jon, been to your place first then, bank accounts?”
“We took what we had out …”
“Alright twenty mins, I’ll have things arranged for you two to leave, I’ll pack some statements for you and once you’re settled in Scotland we can discuss getting you more.”
“Scotland?”
“Twenty mins Jon, be ready.”
The phone went dead, Jon watched it for a moment and slowly looked back up to the living room, Martin was on the couch watching him, Jon made a sound in his throat that bubbled up.
“Martin! How - how long have you been there? You startled me. I didn't even hear you come into the room.”
Martin looked up watching him for a second longer, “Basira is coming? We’re leaving London?”
“It appears that way, I didn’t think we could stay here, not… not now with everything that happened… Martin… you’re ok leaving. I know this must be so overwhelming …”
“Overwhelming…it's terrifying but I'm trying, Jon.” Martin watched Jon come over to the couch and he sat beside him, Martin leaned against him and Jon pulled him in closer holding him as tight as he could.
“Martin, I’ve got you. We are going to do this together. We are going to talk to Basira and she’s got a place for us to stay, somewhere quiet and safe. Together, we’re going to be together and away from here, we’ll figure things out after that. We’ll be together ok?”
“I’m not alone?”
“No Martin, no! I’m here, hold on to that, please Martin, hold that thought tight. You’re here with me we’re not in the Lonely you’re here and I’m here and we are leaving together somewhere safe.”
There was a knock at the door and they could hear Basira on the other side call to them. Jon squeezed Martin’s hand and went to open the door. Martin saw Basira come in and he knew a part of him wanted to stand up and greet her but, the other part of him wanted to leave the room and sit on his bed away from the two people in his living room. He started to shake a little listening to Jon and Basira talk, he heard there is a car out front, the keys are here and this is the map. Address and another set of keys were passed off, a briefcase was handed to Jon, Basira saying something sour, her mouth tight, oh was that blood? Walking towards him now, what was she doing? He snapped his head up when she said his name.
“Martin, are you in there? Hey, it’s going to be ok now. Jon, he won’t let anything hurt you. Go with him and be safe. We’ll figure this out, I need your phone though Martin. You can’t have something to be tracked through.”
“Left it, I don’t have it, it’s on my desk at - at the institute.”
“Oh good, that’s good Martin. Listen, a week from today, I need you to make your way to the town near the safehouse. There is a phone booth, I will call it at 12:00pm sharp, can you be there to pick it up?”
“Sure.”
“Say it back to me Martin, where do I need you and when.”
“Week today, the town, there’s a phone booth, need to pick up at noon sharp.”
“Ok, good.” She touched his hand and he tried so hard not to pull back from the touch although he saw in her eyes she noticed how he tensed. She looked hurt maybe? Martin couldn’t tell. She walked back to Jon and talked quickly and gave him a one armed hug. She turned and walked out of the flat, closing the door behind her.
Jon went back to Martin and held his hand out, “are you ready Martin? Need anything else?”
“No, I’m ready Jon, take me away from here.”
Jon pulled him to his feet and together they left the flat with their bags, a briefcase, a map with a note and two sets of keys. They went down the stairs and outside to find a small blue car waiting where Basira had told Jon it would be. He hit the unlock button and the car flashed it’s lights. Pulling open the back doors they put their stuff inside and then got into the front. With Jon at the wheel he turned the car on and pulled out onto the busy London street, eager to be as far away from The Magnus Institute as he could be.
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It was late, Jon could feel Martin slipping further and further from him the longer he drove. He tried to keep conversation flowing but Martin gave little snippets of answers if they were more than two sentences Jon felt lucky. It was becoming harder and harder to engage him and the temperature in the car was getting colder. They needed to stop for the night.
They entered the small town of Todhill, almost too small to be considered a town it was the size of a Hamlet, but it did have a motel that looked clean and warm. The cars could be parked right at the entrance to the rooms if you were on the ground floor. Jon promised Martin he would be right back and went inside the office to see if there was a ground floor room available. Luckily there was still three available and Jon paid in full for the room at the end of the block. They drove over to the room and went inside to see. It was a clean room, two beds with soft sheets on them.
Martin stayed in the room when Jon went back out to put the parking pass in the window of the car. He heard it then a small dainty meow. He looked back towards the office and saw a large fluffy black and white cat come out the office door, the cat stretched and glanced towards Jon before sitting and licking its paws.
Jon smiled and stuck his head back into the hotel room, “Martin, come look. I found a cat.”
Martin looked up from where he was sitting on the bed and slowly moved over to the door where he could look. The cat promptly looked up from the bath it was giving itself and started to walk towards them. Jon grinned and Martin stepped out of the door frame despite himself. The cat gave a small meow and made its way to them, it seemed to make a show of walking as regal as possible, lifting their paws in a proud fashion always one right after the other. The cat stopped just in front of Martin and looked up slowly. It had a blue and a green eye, Jon made a small gasp. What a beauty.
The office door had opened and a woman had walked out shaking her head, “that’s old Tabitha boys, she likes to find someone to crash with for the night. Her choice and it looks like it’s the two of you. Good luck if you don’t want her to be there, makes one awful racket until you let her in. She won’t be any problem, just curls up for the night and heads out when you do in the morn.”
Martin ….smiled at Tabitha. “I’m sure she won’t be a problem. Right Jon?”
Jon was so startled to see Martin smile, to hear him talk with what seemed like his personality melting through he almost didn’t answer the question, “ ah, yes she’s welcome in our room, I - I love cats.”
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Jon shut the door and turned to see Martin standing next to the bed where Tabitha had happily settled herself. She stretched her paws out and rolled onto her belly looking like she was waiting for scritches. Martin obliged and let out a contented sigh. Jon slowly moved to them afraid to break the spell Tabitha had weaved around Martin. He ended up standing beside Martin, their hips and legs touching, he felt the slight tense in Martin but he didn’t pull away. Jon pretended not to notice and gave Tabitha a scratch behind her ears.
“Jon?”
Jon looked up from the cat at Martin, he was watching Jon with a slight tremor. “Martin, you're shaking, what is it?”
“I-I- don’t know… I’m cold Jon. So .. cold.” Martin sat down on the bed still shaking and Jon sat down beside him pulling him in close. Martin shook harder with the contact, it felt so strange to have anyone try to comfort him, to touch him. How could anyone be that close to him? Tabitha stood up and made her way over to Martin’s lap and lay down, she looked up at Martin with calm knowing eyes and mewed.
Martin’s breath came out in a rush and he sucked back in a fresh breath. Tabitha started to purr, turning to Jon she swished her tail at him to almost say what are you waiting for, help him. Jon rubbed Martin’s arms and felt him so slowly calm his tremors. He held him tightly afraid to let go and have him start to shake again.
“Martin, I’m here, I’m with you, it won’t have you again Martin, do you hear me, listen Martin, I won’t let the Lonely take you, it will have to pull me through well before it ever got to you. I’m not leaving you, not again, please…. Martin? You’re safe, I’ve got you.” Tabitha rubbed her head on Martin’s stomach purring loudly and kneading into his thighs.
“Jon,” Martin looked down, “would it be alright if … I uh.. I need …”
“What Martin, how can I help you? What do you need from me?”
“I need … contact… to be held… I’m so scared that I’ll - drift off - again. I need you.”
“Oh Martin,” Jon pulls him towards the top of the bed with him and has Martin lay on his back, Jon curls up half on top of him, head firmly settled by Martin’s collarbone, Martin’s arms wrap around Jon and Jon moves so his leg is thrown on top of Martin’s. They are tangled and connected. Finally, Martin’s skin begins to warm. Tabitha chooses to lay next to Jon’s head just below the other collar bone. Martin is covered by warm supporting bodies.
They lay there in a pile comforted in each other listening to Tabitha purr as she sleeps soundly on top of Martin. Martin moves his arm up so he can give her a pet. “Think she knows something was wrong?”
“Hmm,” Jon opens his eyes and looks at the cat, she is close to his face and all he can see is her blue and green eyes. She reaches her paw out and softly touches Jon’s nose. She then stands up and stretches before hopping off of Martin and settling on the second bed up by the pillows. “Yes, Martin, I think she knew we needed her tonight.”
“I’m tired Jon, are you ok if we get ready for bed?”
“Of course. I can go and grab the clothes from the car.”
Jon went to sit up and Martin grabbed his hand pulling him back beside him. “No, it’s ok, I don’t really want to move from here, I just wanted to get comfy, maybe…”
“Ok Martin. I don’t have to leave the room. Do- I mean - Tabitha can keep you company if you want to sleep in separate beds? You - won’t be alone. I won’t leave, I promise.”
“Oh! Oh…Christ why is this so hard to say? Jon ask me.”
“What?” Jon looks at Martin nearly in tears and is suddenly nervous.
“I want you to ask me properly so I - I can just say it. I’m - I’ve never been good at talking about what I need and The Lonely has not helped.”
“You’re sure?”
“Please.”
“Alright… Martin, what do you need right now?”
“I need to be held but not just held, I need to feel you, not clothes against clothes, I need to feel you Jon, against me. I want real contact skin to skin. I want to fall asleep with you in my arms…” Martin looks down at the floor, “oh… uh…huh…”
“Martin?” Jon cradles his face in his hand and carefully pulls him up to look at him. “It’s ok, it makes sense. I can do that, we can do that Martin.”
“Really?”
Jon pulls his shirt over his head and looks Martin in the eyes. “I’m turning the lights out, let's go to bed Martin. Besides,” he looks over at the other bed where Tabitha is watching them both stretched out comfortably, “it’s not like there is really any room on the other bed for me anyways.”
Martin looks over at Tabitha and giggles, “no I suppose not. She’s a proper queen.”
Jon switches the lights off and they get undressed and lay together skin to skin. The feeling of Martin being so open and close brings tears to Jon’s eyes. He rolls over and gets back into the same position as before, wrapped on top of Martin. Taking his hand into his he quietly says, “Martin, I’m not asking for you to say anything back to this, but I need you to hear this, you have to understand.”
He takes a deep breath and pushes forwards, “Martin, I love you. I love you for everything you are, every single thing you’ve sacrificed and done, I love you, … I love you so damn much.”
Martin hears the words and starts to cry. He rolls into Jon so they are face to face, “Jon, can … I kiss you?”
Jon answers by kissing Martin first. It’s a butterflies kiss, soft and light, floating on their lips for the briefest moments, but that moment Martin is sure will be seared into his heart forever. “I love you too Jon. Jon, I love you too.”
They both laugh, cry, kiss and talk the rest of the night away. When the morning light peaks through the window they have fallen asleep in each other's arms. Warm, safe, and healing from the past.
When they wake, Tabitha is laying on top of them purring happily. Her added warmth makes waking up even nicer. Martin smiles up to her and gives her a few scritches under her chin. “Thank you Tabitha, you helped a lot last night. You’re a very sweet girl.” She stretches and yawns, jumping off of them and waiting at the door as they dress and make sure everything is ready. Opening the door she steps out of the room and heads back to the office.
Jon and Martin climb back in the car and continue on their drive to the safety of the cabin that is waiting for them. This first night, coming back into themselves from the Lonely will be a memory to chairish for both of them. The first I love yous, the first kiss, the feeling of safety, warmth and love. They were together and could face anything.