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Oliver just wanted it to be tomorrow already. He already missed Felicity and was dreading spending the night without her. He was a bit too use to sleeping beside her by now.
But Thea and her mother had stolen her away saying he couldn’t see her until tomorrow. He didn’t understand why she couldn’t have slept in their bed, with him, and gone to get ready at Thea’s in the morning. They lived in the same building, it was only a few floors of a difference. But no, his sister wanted this done right, and as both Oliver and Felicity had learned, Thea would win the stubbornness battle. To keep the peace they’d let her have her way, but now Oliver was lonely and wanted his girl back.
He was surprised then to hear a knock on the door. He was even more surprised when he answered the door to see Laurel there.
“I know it’s late, but can we talk?” she asked
Oliver was surprised at this. They didn’t talk much anymore, not personal stuff anyway – they kept the talking to their mission. She was closer to his wife-to-be these days.
“Sure” he replied and gestured her into his house.
After exchanging the usual pleasantries Oliver felt himself get a bit irritated and asked “Why are you here Laurel? Felicity’s not here”
“I know” she replied “It’s you I want to talk to”.
“So talk” he replied.
“Why not me?” She asked
“What?” Oliver asked stunned
“Why not me?” she exclaimed, “You use to love me, well, I think you did. But you ran away with my sister at the first sign of commitment. But her, Felicity, you’re devoted to her. You can’t wait to marry her, to build a life with her. Why didn’t you want that for you and me?”
Oliver looked at her stunned. He hadn’t thought about them as a couple for a very long time. He had thought he wanted her back when he returned from the Island, but that was a way to absolve his past bad behaviour. Then without even looking he’d found what he needed, with a ponytailed genius with glasses.
He thought for a moment, he probably did owe her an explanation, Felicity had told him many times that honesty was the best policy - even if it sometimes hurt. So he decided to be honest.
“Laurel, I’ll try and explain this to you as best I can. I haven't thought about it for a long time, about us. But I think I can say that the man I was back then wasn't who I am now”.
Laurel looked at him like he was an idiot, but he continued
“The man, no boy, you were with was Ollie Queen. He was selfish, spoiled and did what he wanted. Yet was told by my mother and my father and everyone that Laurel Lance was the perfect partner for the heir to the Queen fortune. That you would make the perfect wife for me. I was 22 years old. Far too young and imature for any sort of commitment. I didn't want any of it, I just wanted someone to see me as me. But you wanted it. You wanted to be the wife of the billionaire - don't deny it. You let me away with so much, you put up with everything, just so I wouldn't leave."
"That's not true" cried Laurel.
"Yes, it is. Ollie was a selfish creature. And he was horrible to you. Sleeping with your sister and so much worse. And you, you let him away with all of it. Kept taking him back. So he did it more. Do you know I even got one of your friends pregnant? No, you didn’t, because she lost the baby and then left town."
Laurel looked at him in shock. She knew some of this, but not about the pregnancy. “Really?” she said “You bastard”
“Yes, I was. But let me finish, Laurel, you wanted to know and I’m going to tell you the truth. Because you’ve come here tonight looking for it, so I’m going to give you what you asked for. The reasons it was never going to be you, even without the Island."
“I’ve talked about this to Felicity, and she helped me understand." he said quietly "you and I are too similar. And we're toxic for each other - don't shake your head, we don't fit together. We could have settled down and got married, but I would never have been faithful to you. And you would have hated me for it in the end."
"When I came back" Oliver continued "I felt so much guilt for the way I was pre-island. And I thought that if I could get you to love me again, to forgive me, I could forgive myself. But the man who loved you as best he could was long gone, and so was my heart."
“I’m going to tell you something that I’ve only ever told Felicity. While I was gone I had to return to Starling and I saw all of you. Including you and Tommy and Thea. And while I was there I crossed paths with a blonde who babbled. We never spoke but I saw her and she stirred something in me that I thought was long dead. She made me smile, I think the only time I really smiled while I was gone. And when I came back, three years later, I met her for real and couldn’t keep away from her."
“Felicity started helping me long before anyone else - even John. She just didn’t know why. She was my IT go-to person right from the start. And I couldn’t keep away from her. I kept finding excuses to talk to her, draw her in and she became part of my team. But I was still trying to get you back, yes, I was really screwed up then, and we did some damage, especially to Tommy, but we both have to live with that."
“But the difference with Felicity, and with Digg, was that they only knew me. They had never met the screw up I use to be. They would have hated me and I would have had nothing to do with either of them - fool that I was. You know, the two people I’m closest to in the world."
“I was in love with Felicity before I knew what was happening. Sara knew, Digg knew, but I was fighting it."
“You know she’s far too good for me, don’t you?” Oliver stated, pausing with a wry smile.
“Yes” Laurel replied “She’s probably too good for all of us”.
Oliver laughed “Yes, that’s why I fought being with her for so long. I really don’t deserve her. But she thinks differently and I learned to always do what she asks. Things work when I listen to her.
“But do you know something else. When I accepted that I was in love with her I’ve never looked at anyone else. No one, not one date, one flirtation nothing. Even when I’d pushed her away and she was with Palmer, I never wanted anyone else. I even told Digg I thought I was going to die alone”.
“I didn’t know that” said Laurel quietly.
Oliver continued “I don’t really talk about this stuff, and I think it’s not something you and I should really talk about. But know this, she knows me, better than anyone, even better than me sometimes. She’s in my head and in my heart and I love that. But she also would never take any of my shit - she never has. If I tried to pull any of the stuff you’d put up with I’d never see her again. And nothing is worth that price”.
Laurel stared at Oliver, finally seeing the man he’d become. This wasn’t the person she once thought she knew better than anyone. This was someone else. And she didn’t really know this person at all. But she was beginning to.
“So, to answer your question” Oliver concluded “The person I was, Ollie, was too selfish and far too young to make a commitment. And as you kept excusing the awful behaviour, nothing ever changed. And nothing ever would have. I might have married you, but we’d have both ended up miserable. Anything we tried to rekindle was trying to recapture a past that is long gone. An easier time, without the pain we’ve both had to endure. But our lives have shaped who we are today. And for me that’s a man that’s found the person he wants to spend his life with, have a family with and grow old with. And I hope someday, you find that too”.
“Thanks” said Laurel “I understand now. And I’m happy for you, for both of you actually.” She felt a huge weight lifted from her. This has bothered her for a while, why he didn’t want her the way he wanted Felicity.
She gave Oliver a quick hug and said her goodbyes. As she left she wondered if the guy from Star Labs, who’d been so excited to meet her, would be at the wedding. It was time to start getting out there again and enjoy someone who liked her for her.
As Oliver went to close the door he saw his future bride walk towards him. He smiled.
“Couldn’t stay away?” he asked.
“I snuck out, and left a note. Couldn’t sleep.” Felicity replied.
She looked at Laurel leaving, who stated “Oliver will fill you in. Everything’s OK. I’ll see you tomorrow”.
Oliver leaned to kiss Felicity. “I’ll tell you later, right now I want to have some of that pre-marital sex they talk about. Won’t have a chance after tomorrow, I’m getting married you see”.
“Who’s the lucky girl” muttered Felicity as she pushed the door closed with her foot and leaned up for a kiss.