Chapter Text
“This is a horrible idea”
Is what was probably going through everyone’s heads, with differing levels of mirth.
Bruce Wayne paced at an even speed, face grave and hands behind his back. Almost every vigilante in Gotham (Jason, Harper, Kate, and Barbara had been spared, for differing reasons) stood in a line with similar posture; straight backed and chins up. To an outsiders perspective, a military debriefing would have seemed comically overkill just for a party, but anyone who’d been with the Bats long enough knew there was no such thing as “over-prepping” specially not for a gala.
“This is the first time all current member of the family will be attending a gala all at once, the press will be EVERYWHERE. Assume you’re being recorded at all times.” Bruce seemed to be using his Batman voice.
“And Remember” He turned sharply on his heel and paced the other direction. Shoes squeaking against the manners waxed wooden floors. ”We have a reputation to maintain-”
”You can’t honestly except us to do this!?” Damian interrupted sharply “This act, it’s humiliating!”
Bruce sighed, but before he could try to convince the youngest, Dick jumped in.
“It’s alright, you’re still young after all. Nobody expects you to commit to missions as intensely as B does. Steph and Jason don’t really change their personalities much for cover either!”
Damian was smart enough to know he was being manipulated, just not strong enough to overpower his pride. He could NOT let such implications stand. However, Bruce continued quickly before Damian had time to get more than an angry mutter out. The last thing they needed was a fight to break out before the party had even begun.
“Now, you all have your roles prepped?”
“Golden Child, playboy, party animal, says something stupid at least every other sentence.” Dick spoke first, donning the air headed, slightly smug grin that was uncannily effective at making him look like a total douchebag (something he was very well practiced in, after attending so many events)
“I thought we were supposed to be using DIFFERENT personalities” Stephanie chimed in, earning her a high five from both Cassandra and Tim, and a loud shush from Bruce
“Rich kid born from money into more money, un-athletic, try to take the brunt of the press to promote the the foundation to the wealthier guests and reporters” Tim continued as if there had been no interruption.
“Damian?” Bruce prompted the kid who still looked very sour at the task.
“Completely incompetent, dopey, sniveling brat, like the rest of the children there. Try to make *polite* small talk.” He grimaced, but was determined to prove that he could hold a cover persona even more elaborate than the rest of them.
He nodded, turning to the remaining members “Cass, since you’ve rarely made it to any of these, do you have cover prepared?”
Cassandra nodded
“Timid, Reserved, shy” She spoke curtly “stick to someone else when talking to the press” They hadn’t bothered to hide the fact that she was being heavily supervised for these events (she’d probably figure it out immediately anyways). It wasn’t that they thought she was too incompetent or stupid, it was the exact opposite problem. She was scarily over competent for someone who was supposed to be a coddled rich kid, and with the.. difficult.. crowd that attended these events, they really wanted to avoid a repeat of last time she attended a gala (They had done their best to wipe all traces of it from ending up on social media, but “Reclusive Wayne Heir punches Billionaire Lex Luther” had still made its way to a couple headlines..)
“Hm, and you all know the rules-“
Yes we know! They’re the same every time” someone quickly cut in before he could go over them AGAIN
Bruce nodded begrudgingly “We leave in 20 minutes” He turned on his heel again to leave, but before he did, he added in a sudden bout of colossally poor communication “Oh, and the press is getting antsy, it’s been a while since the last Wayne scandal made front page, and it’s about time to lead them away from digging into anything actually newsworthy”
A detective is trained pretty heavily on the art of reading facial expressions, it’s an important skill in both combat and casework. Though the change is too subtle for most to see, upon reviewing the security footage of this incident, any bat-trained detective can see the minute changes of expression and straightening of postures that tell the exact second the whole thing went downhill:
The moment each of the family individually thought ‘yeah, I can handle the distraction for tonight!’
“Dismissed” Bruce barked, unknowing of the absolute chaos he had just released onto the world.