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Chapter Text

The release papers had gone through quickly, Pettigrew's trial was scheduled, and it wasn't even noon when Remus found himself sitting in the headmaster's office. 29 days Sirius had spent in Azkaban, surrounded by dementors with fresh grief oozing off him like chum to sharks. Remus shuddered at the thought. The time it took to cast a patronus was too long to be near a dementor, he couldn't imagine a month.

Dumbledore was leaning back easily in his chair, making small talk that Remus only robotically responded to. The old wizard seemed to understand, continuing his musings on nothing of particular importance while they waited. 

The floo flared green and Sirius stumbled out, his hair a wreck and face haunted. He'd been allowed to change back to his clothes, though, jeans and a leather jacket, and he clenched his wand tightly in his fist. Stormy grey eyes looked around the room wildly, taking in the familiar setting, the old wizard smiling amiably at him, before finally settling on Remus.

" Moony! " he croaked, turning towards him. Remus rushed to him, knocking the chair over in the process and wrapping his arms around him. "They're gone, Moony, and it's all my fault."

"You stupid sod," Remus moaned, "You thought I was the spy."

"I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry," he sobbed, his head buried in the crook of Remus's neck, "Please forgive me."

Remus buried his own face in the now ratty hair, "Why didn't you come to me after they were killed? I would have helped you."

"Too ashamed," he muttered, "Thought if I got him -" he shook his head. 

"I didn't know what to think - because either you betrayed them or… or you didn't trust me."

Sirius hissed in a breath, "Never again, Moony, I swear, I never should have trusted that fucking rat, not over you."

"I know, Padfoot," he breathed, and at the nickname Sirius finally wrapped his own arms around him, clawing into his jumper. "Harry keeps asking for them, and they're never coming back, and you weren't there, Pads ," Remus added and finally broke, his own tears falling. 

They stood clinging to each other, bodies wracked with sobs, the entire rest of the world not existing.  As the worst of it passed, settling down to shaky breaths and whimpers, Dumbledore cleared his throat and they both looked over. 

He gave them a sad smile, conjuring up handkerchiefs which he sent to them. They both took them and cleaned their faces, managing to huff a small laugh. Remus pulled a chocolate bar out of his pocket and shoved it into the man's chest before sitting in the chair which Dumbledore had already uprighted.

Sirius chuckled as he unwrapped it, "Really, Moonbeam?"

"It helps after a dementor attack!" he retorted defensively.

“He is right,” Dumbledore pointed out with a fond chuckle, “Of course, Madam Pomfrey will be checking him over after we’ve had a chance to talk. I imagine he will need more than chocolate to heal.”

“I will be asking her how the damage from a month with dementors compares to a week at the Dursley’s,” Remus informed him, grimacing.

Sirius looked between the two of them, confused, “Why would he go to the Dursleys? The will explicitly stated he was not to be placed with them,” he glowered at Remus, “You didn’t refuse?”

“I wasn’t given the option and I’m the only reason he’s not still there,” Remus snarled, not in the mood to be questioned by the person who hadn’t trusted him. Then the words sunk in and he snapped his head around to look at Dumbledore, “There was a will? You ignored their explicit instructions for Harry?”

Dumbledore cleared his throat, “As you are aware, I have already accepted the error on my part and the gravity of my actions.”

Sirius muttered something under his breath but Remus crossed his arms and shot him a harsh look, “And if you thought I refused - then they still trusted me, it was just you who didn’t?”

Sirius kicked at the carpet and glared at his boots, “Lily wouldn’t believe it of you. Should’ve listened to her.”

“If I may, gentlemen,” Dumbledore interrupted, “I have asked you both here to discuss the matter of Sirius’s residence, to ensure he is somewhere safe and supported after his unfortunate ordeal.”

“Yeh, my landlord’s probably rented out my flat by now,” Sirius said, leaning back in his chair with a huff, “Don’t suppose anyone saved any of it?”

“I collected the contents of your residence and placed them in safe keeping,” Dumbledore assured him. Sirius gave a non-committal hum in response. The old wizard continued, “For the last few weeks, Remus has been staying with Harry at the Weasleys.”

“I thought you had your own place?” Sirius asked, looking over at him with a frown.

“I told you I wasn’t given the choice - after I found Harry being abused, I took him to Madam Pomfrey and McGonnagall insisted the Weasleys were the best choice to raise him,” Remus explained bitterly, “But they’ve got too much on their plate already, so I’m staying to help.”

“Blimey,” Sirius grunted, running a hand over his face, “Why did they even bother writing a ruddy will if no one was going to read it?”

“It has been helpful, being there, Harry really loves being around the other children,” Remus said quietly then shook his head, “Anyways - you can use my place, if that’s too much.”

“Or - you and Harry can come back to your place, with me, and we can raise him like his parents wanted us to,” Sirius suggested with a raised eyebrow.

Dumbledore opened his mouth to respond, but Remus was faster, “I’m not taking him away from a home he’s settled into after everything he’s just been through-” he paused, reaching out and placing his hand on Sirius’s, “ But - we can work towards that.”

“And I trust that Sirius won’t simply be left alone, you’ll still see him regularly?” Dumbledore asked, “I don’t believe isolation is the right choice for him right now.”

“Not like I can’t go out if I need company. Never been hard for me to find,” Sirius said with a chuckle before shifting, “I want to be able to see Harry as often as I can.”

“I’m confident that will be arranged,” Dumbledore said amiably, and Remus voiced his agreement.

—

The visit to Madam Pomfrey’s was thankfully brief.  She did have a potion to help with any lingering damage from the dementors. It wouldn’t do much after truly long term stays, but was more than enough to heal a month in Azkaban. He was somewhat malnourished, and she gave him a nutrient potion just to be safe but assured him that as long as he took care of himself going forward - he would be alright. She also gave him a few nights’ worth of dreamless sleep potions.

“They’ll help get you back on your feet faster,” she’d explained kindly.

And while she made sure to stress that Sirius was an adult wizard, and therefore far more resilient and hardier than a 15 month old - yes, the week at the Dursley’s had indeed managed to do more damage.

“Something I will inform the headmaster of, should he interfere in your caring of that child again,” the healer assured Remus with a wink.

They floo’d back to Remus’s small house in the woods, where Remus sent off a patronus to Molly letting her know all was well and to send for him if she needed anything. Dumbledore had promised to send an owl over explaining the situation with Sirius, and the man had his release papers kept safely on his person. He kept checking they were there every few minutes, reassuring himself he had proof of his innocence. The Prophet wouldn’t announce it until tomorrow, and while the Aurors ought to know - the public certainly didn’t.

“I imagine you’d want a shower before anything else?” Remus offered, “You can borrow some of my clothes as well, if you need,” he added, gesturing to his bedroom.

“Yes, absolutely, thank you,” Sirius said, wrapping his arms around him again and holding him for a long moment before making his way through. 

Once the sound of the shower set on, Remus turned to glare at the black cat that was peering out from under the couch. 

“I left you with Harry!” he hissed. The cat simply gave a pointed look in Sirius’s direction and hissed back. Remus rolled his lips together - admittedly, that was Regulus’s brother. He supposed it was fair that the man might want to see him, not that they’d had much of a relationship for the better part of a decade. He sat down next to the couch and the cat crept out.

“Are we telling him about you, then?” he asked, running a hand through his hair.  The cat simply shook its head. “So - you’re just my familiar, Llewellyn?” A nod in response.  “Who I talk to. Which, from what I’ve seen, is normal pet owner behavior.” A small snort. “Will you be nice to him?” A flick of the tail and preening. 

“He’s probably staying here. Are you going to stay with him?” He couldn’t bring himself to ask ‘or come back to the Burrow with me’. He justified this with how yes or no questions were easier in this form. Either way, the cat answered by stepping into Remus’s lap and stretching up to rub his head under the man’s chin. Remus smiled at that.

“Never pegged you for a cat person, Remmy,” Sirius mused, stepping out of the shower looking far more himself. His hair was properly brushed and once again styled, falling in effortless waves over his shoulders. He was wearing one of Remus’s band shirts and a pair of corduroys that he somehow managed to make look cool, though Remus knew if he put the same thing on he would still end up looking bookish. 

“Yes, well, losing everyone I loved in the span of 24 hours apparently called for desperate measures,” he said with a lopsided smile, picking the cat up and pulling himself to stand. 

Sirius walked over, reaching over tentatively until the cat nudged his hand and initiated pettings. “Reminds me a bit of my fur,” he mused, “Trying to replace me, Moony?” he looked up at him with a cheeky grin. The cat tensed in his arms.

“I can assure you that the similarities end with the fur,” he pointed out with a soft laugh, “He’s certainly not your replacement - and he’s been incredibly helpful in getting through these last few weeks.” The cat purred in response, tilting his head up to prompt Sirius to scratch under his chin. 

“He got a name?”

“Llewellyn - it means ‘like a lion’, from Welsh”

“I can see why, he mused fondly, brushing a hand through the fur around his head that tufted out like a mane, “Little lion…” Then his face crumpled and his hands flew to cover it.  He was shaking, and Remus quickly placed the cat on the arm of the couch before pulling him into a hug, running a hand through the soft, long hair that he hadn’t let himself admit how much he’d missed.

“Sorry,” Sirius muttered, “I didn’t want to think about him today - I just - fuck, Moony, I couldn’t save either of my brothers.”

Remus shot a helpless and irritated look at the cat who was now rubbing up against Sirius’s leg. 

—

It was about 3pm when they made it to the Weasley’s.  They apparated outside the wards, the cat once again nestled in Remus’s pack, and Remus squeezed Sirius’s hand before heading in on his own. The cat leapt out of the bag to stay with Sirius, and Remus tilted his head with a frown before making his way inside.

Molly was holding the letter from Dumbledore, and Arthur was home from work early.  They both looked up at him.

“What did Dumbledore tell you?” Remus asked quietly. 

“Peter Pettigrew was captured - alive - right outside our front door,” Molly said, her voice wobbling as she held Ginny closer to her and shot a worried look at the children playing in the living room. The twins appreciated having a set of toddlers to play with - “They aren’t twins but they’re the same age! Like us!” - and were doing clapping games with the two younger boys while Charlie and Percy played wizard’s chess.

“And - Sirius Black is innocent? And Harry’s godfather,” Arthur added, squeezing his wife around the shoulders.

“Yeah, he’s been released,” Remus said, biting his lip, “He’s, um, he’s outside the wards. If you’re okay with letting him come inside.”

Arthur and Molly shared a meaningful glance, silently communicating the way over a decade of marriage allowed them to. Then they both smiled and nodded.

“It would be wonderful to see him again,” Molly said.

Arthur went with Remus to meet him outside the wards.  Sirius was crouching down, petting the cat and muttering to it, though he straightened up and looked between the two men hopefully as soon as he noticed them.

“It’s good to see you,” Arthur said warmly, clapping him on the shoulder, “The boys will love to meet you.” 

Sirius beamed up at him, walking towards the house side by side with Remus, their hands finding each other and fingers tangling together. Remus gave him another reassuring squeeze before they stepped inside.

When they got inside, Molly had fetched Harry and was holding him on her hip, completely unphased at juggling a squirmy toddler and newborn.  She pointed at the arrivals and Harry followed her finger, his eyes brightening and squealing, “Reeree!” then they widened and he wailed, “ Pafoo! ” He kicked and sobbed, reaching for Sirius with all his might.

For a second Sirius stood frozen, until Remus shoved him solidly and he tripped forward, rushing over to the toddler and collecting him in his arms, “It’s okay, Prongslet, I’m here, I’m here,” he shushed, rocking and bouncing as if they’d never been separated, “Padfoot’s here, love.”

Remus smiled, even as Harry’s grief once again opened itself. His tears continued, ‘Pafoo’ mixed in with ‘Mama’ and ‘Dada’ and soon Sirius was crying with him as well, crooning apologies and reassurances as they clung to each other. It was sweet, and clearly needed by the both of them.  He glanced down at the black cat that was now sitting next to his leg. Harry had never called Regulus ‘Pafoo’, he had known it wasn’t Sirius, even if he had reminded the boy of him enough to be comforted by him. Or, perhaps, Harry just somehow knew Regulus was someone safe.

It wasn’t Lily and James. It wasn’t enough, it would never be enough. But it was something.

—

After putting Harry to bed, Remus escorted Sirius back to his home. Their home? Sirius’s home? The place he didn’t know what to call anymore. With his books and his clothes and enough food in the kitchen, well, certainly for overnight. It was pretty bare, since it hadn’t been properly occupied in a few weeks. Regulus was with them, still a cat, still unknown to his brother.

He fidgeted, telling Sirius what he already knew about the amenities. Remembering the man’s earlier comment about going out for company and trying not to notice that it bothered him. They had fallen back together fairly comfortably, but things weren’t the same. They’d lost James and Lily. It turned out that Sirius hadn’t trusted him at the end. After Remus had spent years not trusting him after they were 16.

Now they were alone and not preparing to visit anyone and things felt tense. They both stood awkwardly, not really looking at each other and not sure what to say. Remus was supposed to say goodbye, get back to the Burrow, to Harry. Let Sirius get on with his evening, his life, prepare for the next day when his innocence would be announced across the country while the world had breakfast.

He felt a hard thud against the back of his legs and he stumbled forward, crossing the distance and grabbing onto Sirius for support.  He glanced behind to see a black tail disappearing under the couch.

“Your cat’s got an attitude,” Sirius said with a soft chuckle, looking down at him with sparkling eyes.

“He’s got something alright,” Remus muttered, straightening himself without letting go of Sirius or meeting his eyes. He breathed in. Sirius didn’t have his usual soaps or aftershave or anything, he smelt like Remus’s home - with that distinctly Sirius musk underneath.

Remus took a step back, ignoring the irritated growl that came from under the couch when he did, and ran a hand through his hair.

“I need to head back."

"Yeh, of course," Sirius agreed quietly. 

"C'mon, kit," Remus said, leaning down to gesture for the cat to come out. He was met with a hiss, the silhouette of a tail flicking in the dark. Remus scowled, "Harry needs you - he sleeps best when you're there." The cat swatted out, catching the edge of his finger with a claw.  He pulled back, shaking his hand and glaring at the space under the couch.

"He might just not like the idea of leaving a stranger alone in his home," Sirius pointed out fondly, taking Remus's finger and healing it before he could even fully acknowledge the sting of it. 

Remus nodded, knowing that wasn't the case. Sirius wasn't a stranger. It made sense, really, for Regulus to want to keep close to his brother. It made sense that Sirius needed someone with him right now, and there wasn't anyone else. He still felt abandoned. Not that he had any real right to expect Regulus to choose him over his brother.

"I will see you tomorrow, yeh?" Sirius asked, nudging his shoulder into Remus's. 

"Of course," Remus said with a soft smile, "Provided the cat doesn't smother you in your sleep."

Sirius laughed at that, "You know - I can see that monster succeeding. Where'd you find him, anyways, he's practically a panther?"

"That is a conversation for another day," he said, not willing to spin lies around this. 

"Alright. Goodnight, Moonbeam," Sirius said.

"Goodnight, Pads," he replied before apparating to the edge of the Burrow's wards.

Chapter Text

It wasn't a bad night. The pettiest, most ridiculous part of him resented this because it meant he couldn't use it to insist Regulus came back. Fortunately it was only a small part, and instead he was deeply relieved that the excitement and grief of seeing Sirius hadn't caused any set backs - regressions , he had learned they were called - and Harry didn't seem to mind the cat's absence.  

Remus frowned as he gave the baby his 3am bottle, realizing now that Harry had been sleeping without the cat more and more often. The nightmares of the last week had been almost entirely his and Regulus's. He glanced down at his finger, where the cut had been, and mused that he may have deserved that more than he realized. Using Harry to guilt the man when it was Remus who would miss the company most.

He settled the toddler back in the crib, clean and full and already drifting off, sang two lullabies to be safe, and settled into bed.  He listened as Harry’s breathing deepened, then felt the bed dip and heard Regulus telling him to move over.

He snorted slightly, doing so without even thinking about it.

"Still annoyed with me?" Regulus asked with a soft laugh.

"You scratched me," Remus pointed out. 

"You were being daft," Regulus retorted, playing with his tawny curls thoughtfully, "We hadn't had a chance to talk - someone needed to stay with him," he pursed his lips together, "Make sure he didn't get himself so drunk he choked on his own vomit."

"You drank yourself sick on his birthday."

"Yes, so I know the Black predilection to overindulgence to avoid emotional pain."

Remus shook his head, "I take it he's fine, then?"

"Mm, he's in one piece. Neither of you will be fine for a good while," he said, then sighed, "It was the nicest time we've spent together in at least 5 years. Part of me wants to let him keep thinking I'm a cat."

"I'm not hiding this from him for long," Remus warned.

"You've hid your feelings for him for longer."

Remus breathed through his nose, suspecting this was coming but still not wanting to face it, "I thought that's what your shove was about. We haven't talked about anything - he just got out of Azkaban - I'm not ready."

"And when, exactly, will you be?"

"He thought I was the spy!" he hissed, "Can I at least find out how deep that distrust went before baring my soul to him?"

Regulus made an irritated, disgruntled noise, "He did the same thing he always does - he self destructed. Deep down decided he didn't deserve anything and destroyed it."

"James and Lily are dead," Remus warned, "Do not get flippant."

"I promise I'm not - if I knew he could destroy so much… I would have tried harder," his voice was distant and remorseful, "I thought if he had his friends, his Marauders , his new brother ," he was seething and stopped to calm himself, "I thought he would be safe with you, if I knew he could destroy you all - maybe I could have stopped it."

"You really think all this happened because he didn't believe he really deserved James? "

"I know he doesn't think he deserves happiness," Regulus said softly, "And my whole life I've watched him end up destroying every happiness he got. Look at what he did after realizing Pettigrew was the traitor. He didn't go to you for help, he didn't tell anyone, he did the stupidest possible thing and got himself locked up."

Remus pressed his lips into a thin line, not wanting to think about this. Not knowing how to feel about it. It was the middle of a nearly moonless night and he should be sleeping.

"Why do you care so much if I tell him I may fancy him?" Remus asked quietly.

Regulus ruffled his hair then placed a kiss on his forehead, "You're both my persons - I want you to be happy. We all grew up in a war. Now you actually have a chance to be happy."

"You've spent too long living as a cat." He meant it, remembering the refined boy that had been his classmate at Hogwarts. Then, there had been glimpses of it there as well. Gentle affection when he felt comfortable enough to let his guard down. Uncertain and hesitant like a fawn's first steps. Perhaps this was him making up for lost time, the same way Sirius had fallen into affection with the Marauders so quickly.

—

The next morning, Molly insisted that Remus take the day to himself. Arthur was staying home, the Ministry gave him a day off after his home was attacked by a death eater - the official story, close enough to the truth. It was already a day off work for Remus, which would usually mean spending it with Harry and the Weasleys.

"When’s the last time you had a day to yourself?" Remus asked, knowing how sullen he sounded. She just chuckled and patted his arm before shooing him off.

He left out the door, walking to the ends of the ward and then down the lane. His travel bag was over his shoulder, lighter without its passenger. It had been nearly a month since he'd been alone. Well, a few times in the bookshop - on days Regulus hadn't come and there was a lull between customers. The rest of his time had been spent with Harry and the children and the Weasleys and occasionally Poppy and McGonnagall and almost always with the black shadow he'd accidentally taken in.

The black shadow that was now following Sirius. The kind part of him knew it made sense, the two brothers had never stopped loving each other but had let stubbornness and pride stand between them. They deserved this chance to reconnect in whatever way they could find. The dark part of him felt replaced. Squirmed to remember how strongly Harry reacted to Sirius, how much better the boy had known him during the war, how much everyone had always preferred the charismatic man with the bark-like laugh.

Remus found his way into forest, where he nearly always came back to. It felt like home and safety in a way being around people almost never could. 

A day to himself.

Strictly speaking, he could go anywhere. Do anything. He was a wizard, after all. He just… didn't want to. He wanted to curl back up in the familiar routine of looking after toddlers and surrounding himself with the endless distractions provided by a house full of children. 

He tapped his fingers against a low hanging branch before giving in and making his way back to the house that he was no longer sure he belonged in, apparating outside it to not disturb anyone and going inside as quietly as he could. Padfoot was laying on the couch, curled into a ball. Remus frowned, surprised by both the form he took and the decision not to take the bed.  

With a startle he realized part of the mass of black fur was a cat, as Regulus opened his eyes and gracefully slunk off the dog, stretching along the rest of the couch.

"Did he take the dreamless sleep potion?" Remus asked, running a hand over the dog's back. The cat shook his head and gave a reproachful look to the sleeping form before hopping off the couch.

"They might let him stay tonight, if he wants to," he bit his lip, "I don't want to leave Harry more than I already have to. Not at night."

"Perhaps it's time to start bringing Harry back here at night?" Regulus suggested softly, standing just behind him. 

"I - I'm not supposed to," he muttered, his cheeks flushing as he felt like a schoolchild again. "I really need to figure out what the actual custody situation is, don't I? I don't even know if I'm allowed to make that call."

" Dumbledore, " Regulus spat in contempt, "So busy with his smoke and mirrors that proper procedure falls by the wayside…" he shook his head, "Yes all of that needs to be sorted. Properly. Merlin, what would happen if you did need to bring him to St Mungo's…" he turned back into the cat and stalked off, continuing hissing and growling to himself. 

That apparently was enough to wake the sleeping dog as soon Sirius was sitting up on the couch, stretching and running a hand through his sleep tousled hair and looking over at Remus.

"You're back," he said with a warm smile.

"From outer space," he agreed pleasantly, "Feel up to going out for breakfast? Molly shooed me out, insisting I take a day to myself."

Sirius frowned, tilting his head to the side, "Without Harry? Can she do that?"

"I, er, don't know. Dumbledore skipped all the official stuff," he admitted sheepishly, "I'd like your help figuring it out."

"I am shocked that the man who completely disregarded Lily and James's will has failed to get this properly documented," Sirius said, rolling his eyes with a groan, "Breakfast first - we'll get the guardianship sorted out after."

Sirius did not take much time getting himself ready, still waiting for Dumbledore to return his belongings and not yet ready to spend a long time staring at himself in the mirror. Fairly soon they were off on foot, into the muggle village where Remus worked and going into the cafe where Regulus had initially found him.

It was cold and wet, so they found a table inside. The cat slipped in and settled himself on a chair unnoticed, and for the first time Remus considered he may have a glamor on him to avoid detection. 

"Llewy doesn't get his own plate?" Sirius asked with a chuckle, ruffling the cat's head.

"He is big enough for it," Remus admitted, "You're welcome to offer him some of yours if you like, he can be finicky though." He cut off a bit of bacon, using the fork to offer it to the cat, who sniffed it before taking it.

"Sliced and served on a fork - you never fed me like that," Sirius teased, tearing off a piece of his own bacon and offering it with his fingers. The cat gave him a look before taking it, gently nipping his fingers in the process. Sirius hissed and jerked his hand back before chuckling.

"Your teeth aren't as sharp," Remus said with a smirk.

"I'll keep that in mind - sweet thing, really, thought he'd avoid me but he came out and kept me company last night," Sirius said fondly.

They got about halfway through the meal on casual, safe subjects. Eventually the heaviness of their situation settled over them like a cloud. 

Remus was the one to bring it up, studying the wallpaper as he asked, "Do you actually trust me now - or do you just feel guilty for thinking I was the spy?"

Sirius froze in the middle of raising a forkful of scrambled egg to his mouth, setting it down on the plate. There was a long moment of silence before he spoke with a trembling voice, "I don't know anything anymore. They're gone and instead of going to their funeral or helping their son, I got myself locked up with dementors and -" 

He covered his face with his hands, his elbows on the table to prop himself up and just shuddered silently. Remus placed a hand on his arm, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb and the black cat slipped onto his lap, purring. 

"I'm sorry," Remus said softly, "We don't have to… I shouldn't have…"

He shook his head, shaggy black hair falling loose around his face and wiped his cheeks before managing to straighten up, "Why couldn't you tell us where you were going? Your missions - it wasn't like anyone else - you'd vanish with maybe a note and be gone for months on end and didn't tell us anything ."

"It was the same for Hagrid, actually," he pointed out with a bitter laugh.

"He wasn't our friend."

"I wasn't allowed to tell you," he rolled his lips together and closed his eyes to try and calm himself, "Because if I did - you wouldn't have let Dumbledore send me."

Sirius swallowed thickly, but otherwise watched him silently.

Remus nodded, poking at the food on his plate to have something else to focus on, "I was so young, I just… took what he told me at face value, thought I had to do what he said, and by the time I started realizing how messed up it was - the damage had been done, you were pulling away and…" 

Eventually Sirius spoke again, "We were all young, just out of school."

"He recruited me when I was 16 - it's why you barely saw me that summer."

"I always thought it was because of that prank."

"It was," Remus said bitterly, finally looking up and meeting his gaze, "Dumbledore used it to blackmail me into starting his missions."

Neither of them moved or spoke for what felt like a long time, before Remus dropped his gaze down to his meal, deciding to work on the tomatoes.

—

It wasn't a surprise when Sirius dipped around the side of a building and Padfoot came back. It had become more and more of a habit of his as the war had run on, the emotional toll easier to take in the dog's form.

There was an absurdity to the situation that Remus almost wanted to laugh at, though. Walking through a quiet muggle village with two massive, all black animals.  Both Black brothers, hiding from the world. Somehow orbiting a poor, broken half breed.

He wanted to talk to Lily about it. About how the quiet, refined boy they'd studied with in the library had defied Voldemort. Laugh together again about how Sirius Black, all bravado to the rest of the world, loved nothing more than getting his belly rubbed while his tail wagged against the carpet.

The realization that he couldn't, never again, hit hard enough to knock the breath out of him and stop him in his tracks. Both animals stopped to look at him and he managed to choke out, "Lily," which was explanation enough. 

The cat stretched up, pawing at his leg until he picked the beast up, while the man quickly reappeared to hold him. Some part of Remus wanted to make a remark about his subtlety - the joke died long before it reached his throat. On a distant level he knew it wasn't fair, anyways, they'd reached the forest path that separated his home from the village.

"I know," Sirius muttered into his ear, "Gonna get you home now." 

The familiar sensation of apparition followed by the more familiar smell of his bedroom.

A few comments passed between them about the amazing woman whose laughter and compassion were gone from this world, then it turned to broken sobs and wails and the sounds of rage and despair escaping their bodies like exorcized demons.

After they'd exhausted themselves, they were left tangled together on the bed, clinging hands and buried faces.

Somehow, the black cat was still between them - having held fast through the storm - settled between their chests and purring with increasing volume.

Sirius was the first to find his way out of the mess of limbs they'd become, looking down at the cat. "Is it weird that that's comforting?"

"It's why he does it," Remus replied, pulling his face out of Sirius's hair with a shaky breath, "He's helped a lot, this last month, I found him on your birthday - I wasn't… I wasn't handling that day well."

"Neither did I," he said with a dark laugh, "The dementors loved me - so much grief, so much loss, so much self loathing," then his face softened with sadness and he caught Remus's cheek in his hand and looked into his eyes, "We had plans - and you were going to be there this year, and… It felt so stupid and I berated myself but no matter how sure I was you were betraying us, I was still so happy you'd be there."

Remus closed his eyes and let the words settle in his mind, the familiarity of the feeling. He huffed out a small laugh, opening his eyes to see confusion and hurt in the storm grey eyes and brushed the hair out of Sirius's face.

"After that prank, and when you pushed me away towards the end, and every time we fought - I was most angry at how much I just wanted to be close to you again," he murmured, watching as the confusion turned to shock and pink bloomed across the tear stained cheeks.

"I missed you, even when I thought you'd betrayed them," Remus said softly.

Sirius let out a long breath and nodded, "Me, too."

Between them, the cat huffed irritably.

—

"Are you going to ask me how long I thought you were the spy?"

They were eating lunch at the island counter, the closest thing Remus had to a table, and had gone silent again. After asking it Sirius looked fidgety, his mouth set in a grim line, like he had been waiting for something and finally just dragged it out.

"I'm pretty sure I know," he pointed out with a raised eyebrow and Sirius frowned, looking down at the sandwich resting on his plate, picking at the slice of the fresh baked bread Remus had bought while they ordered breakfast that morning. "I knew you stopped trusting me after Harry was born." Next to him the man stilled and his face hardened. "You got more protective of Lily for the pregnancy, of course, but every time I visited after Harry - you'd act as a barrier between us. Barely let me hold or touch him."

Sirius nodded, "Yeah… that's it. I don't think we told you but there was some prophecy, that Harry would be targeted and…" he breathed out heavily, "You kept disappearing and it wasn't like the Order missions everyone else had, and I wouldn't let anyone hurt that boy."

He laughed, harsh and bitter, "Was so fucking stupid, wasn't it?"

Remus tapped his fingers on the counter for a moment before looking over and catching Sirius's gaze, "You understand that the problem wasn't suspecting me - the problem was that you didn't suspect Peter as well ."

Sirius stared at him owlishly then tilted his head to the side, "You're not mad that I thought it was you?"

"Of course I am," he said with a soft laugh, "Some days I wanted to go to Azkaban and strangle you - and it hurts," he looked at the ceiling, tilting back as far in the chair as he could without it falling over, "But it makes sense - and that's what hurts the most, knowing I can't justify being angry at you - knowing you were right to be suspicious," he leaned forward and let the chair crash back to the floor with a thud, "You just shouldn't have focused entirely on me ."

"Who would ever have suspected him? He was just… he was so sweet, he just followed us like a puppy, never showed any ambition or… anything like that," Sirius muttered defensively.

"He's smarter than you ever gave him credit for - I told you and James that many times and he proved it with the stunt where he framed you," Remus said sharply and Sirius winced, "It was war. It was the secret keeper - he needed to be so far above suspicion, not just someone you had deemed unnoteworthy."

Sirius grimaced. Attacks rushed into his mind, he could slice into Remus with his words. But it was true. He had chosen Peter because he felt he was unassuming and harmless, someone no one would suspect was the secret keeper so he could continue safely while Sirius played bait. He stewed in his thoughts instead, pride and self loathing warring against each other.

"You underestimate people," Remus said gently when the silence had stretched on and Sirius hadn't moved for several minutes. He didn't look up or acknowledge anything had been said, but Remus continued. "You underestimated Snape - thought he was too much of a coward to go through with it. You underestimated Moony - got cocky after running with me for a few fulls as Padfoot, forgot how dangerous I could be. You underestimated Peter."

"You also said I underestimated my brother, who joined the death eaters after all and died a coward's death," Sirius sneered.

Remus took a sharp breath, "If I'd defied Dumbledore- Lily and James would be alive right now. And I don't believe he would have killed me. Defying Voldemort is not a coward's act."

Sirius just growled, aggressively finishing his sandwich. The food seemed to help calm him and he frowned thoughtfully, "Do you think it was really a coincidence Peter was holed up at the Weasleys before the wards went up? Could he have known Harry would be there?"

Remus tapped his chin as he thought about it, "He may have hoped Harry would end up there. It was one of the more likely places, I suppose, he couldn't get here." 

"You never had him over?"

"I don't think he actually accepted the werewolf thing - I don't blame him. He wasn't like you two, who could fight back and hold your own, Moony could have swallowed him in one bite," he said grimly, "Either way, we weren't close after school."

Then Remus paused and frowned, "I suppose… there is the possibility he was set up…" he shook his head, "Or there's another spy, but there was one day between McGonnagall contacting the Weasleys about us staying and our arrival, and the wards were set up well before we got there - so he would have had to find out and move fast ."

"Urgh, then I hope it was just a coincidence," Sirius smirked, "Bet he pissed himself, when you showed up, someone who could recognize him."

Remus nodded, his jaw tightening because he had not recognized Peter. Either the rat had avoided him, which was fair, or he honestly couldn't pick him out of a lineup of rats. Something which he would very much like to explain, if a certain younger Black brother would decide to admit he was not, in fact, dead.

"Was it hard? Facing him? You were alone, right?" Sirius asked quietly, placing a hand on his arm.

He took a heavy breath and held up a finger to excuse himself before going and picking up the cat from his position stretched across Remus's bed. He held the cat in front of his face for a moment, giving him a meaningful look. The cat looked away and twitched his tail. 

He went over to the island counter, cat in his arms, and sat down heavily, running a hand over his face.

"What happened… well, I didn't face him," he said, "I was in the living room with Harry and Ron and a patronus came in telling me I had to get into the garden immediately - and he was there, human form, unconscious."

"A patronus - there was someone else?!"

"Yeah…"

"And… you aren't worried, you haven't told anyone, you know who it is."

"Yep," he popped the 'p', giving him an apologetic look and tapping his finger against the cat's shoulder. The cat remained stubbornly feline.

Sirius took a long, steadying breath, "You think they're trustworthy."

"I do," he said, relaxing slightly and offering a small smile, "but - they're wanted by the death eaters. If the wrong person finds out, they could be killed."

"I would ask why you don't trust the Order to protect them…" Sirius said grimly, then gave him a sad look, "And you aren't sure if you can trust me?"

"I am confident you won't want them dead - but I don't know how you'll react," Remus said.

Sirius propped his elbows on the counter and rested his chin on his hands for a moment, looking over Remus's face then curiously down at the cat then back at Remus. In a swift movement he had his wand in hand and had cast the spell to reveal an animagus. 

Remus had already braced a hand against the counter, anticipating it - hoping, really - and prevented them from being knocked over. Then he went still and quiet, as the two brothers stared at each other for the first time in far too many years.

"Reggie?" Sirius croaked, grabbing his arm and, when that was solid, moving his hand up to run over his forehead and through his brother's hair. "I - they said you died - the tapestry?"

"Kreacher helped with that part," he said with a small smile.

Sirius wrinkled his nose, "That-"

"You will NOT speak badly of him in my presence," Regulus snarled.

Sirius blinked in confusion before looking at Remus who shrugged, he didn't know either. At this point, Remus was on the other side of the small kitchen and boiling a kettle, having managed to slip away.

"I- o-okay, Reggie," he said uncertainly.

"Thank you, Siri," Regulus huffed softly, "The Dark Lord had me send him on a mission," he shook his head and his face darkened, "It was brutal - he barely survived," he pursed his lips, "But it let Kreacher help me do something that hopefully weakened him."

"Weakened him?" Remus asked with a frown.

"It may have helped Harry survive, then?" Sirius asked, looking at his brother with new eyes. 

Regulus flushed, "That would be presumptuous," he looked down, "I do wish that I could have figured more out sooner."

"Why didn't you tell me?" His voice sounded broken, then he got angry, "Why did you tell him? " He demanded, turning to face Remus, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's been one day ," Remus insisted.

Sirius met his gaze, "You didn't know? Do you swear you didn't know he's been alive all these years?"

Remus held his hands up, meeting his gaze, "I told you - on your birthday, two days after you were arrested, he found me. That's the first time I'd seen him… I think since graduation."

Sirius's shoulders went slack and he closed his eyes for a moment, nodding to himself, "Okay, okay I can handle that," then he looked back at Regulus, hurt etched on his expressive face.

"I didn't know if I could trust you," Regulus said simply, straightening the cuff of his shirt, "I still have my doubts, but apparently Remus does not share my hesitation."

"I'm not having him sob over his dead brother while you're hiding under my couch," Remus snapped, "And you didn't tell me anything about your house elf or weakening Voldemort."

Regulus sniffed haughtily, "It hadn't come up."

"Hang on - then… how did you know you could trust him? I mean, he's a death eater," Sirius asked, gesturing to him, "Did you ask him anything? We just lost Lily and James because of a close friend's betrayal - and you trusted him? "

Remus scuffed his foot on the floor and didn't look up, trying to verbalize why he had trusted the man. There was no reason, really, not before Harry. Regulus had been the reason they found Harry - Remus would have let the door slam in his face and turned away. Then it was hard to imagine that affection and concern for the boy had been a dramatic ruse. Finally he was the one who caught Peter Pettigrew.

He could rattle off reasons why, today, he trusted him. There wasn't a single reason to do so when he snuck into his home that first day. 

Regulus and Sirius just watched him, Sirius getting angrier until Regulus placed a hand on his shoulder, "We were friends - closer than you knew - in school. Then when I showed up, he didn't have anyone else."

"You let him around Harry," Sirius growled towards Remus.

"I wouldn't have been able to help Harry without him - he was the one who found him in the cupboard and forced Dursley to let me in," Remus said flatly, he sucked in a breath, "And he's the reason you're no longer in Azkaban."

"That's- okay, fine, but that's not why you let him stay here in the first place!" Sirius said incredulously. Remus just shrugged, which only made him more irritated. 

"Siri- don't be so harsh ," Regulus muttered softly, " He'd lost everything in a day, I had to push him to eat, " his eyes flicked over to Remus before fixing his brother with a stern look, " he's been a bit suicidal - so, no, not making the best decisions but you can't tell me you haven't made mistakes ."

Sirius grunted, crossing his arms and looking back at Remus, still irritated.

" And don't pretend some of this isn't your ego - annoyed that Remus managed to trust the right person when you couldn't, " he added with a harsh snap.

" That's not fair and you know it, " Sirius snarled at him, " You threw your lot in with you-know-who, and my so-called best friend welcomes you with open arms? "

" I defied him and spent two years in hiding because of it! I quite nearly died- if it weren't for Kreacher, I would have! And all you can do is scowl at his name because he's a reminder of your past! "

" He hurt us! "

" On mother and father's orders! He had no choice - and you never noticed the way he defied them to take it easier on us, having to punish himself in the process! "

" That - I - I still don't have to like him. "

" I am not asking you to, I have only asked you to hold your venom towards him in my presence. "

They were interrupted by the clink of mugs on the counter, one each. Remus took his own and watched on with some amusement.

"You don't have to keep your voices down - you're fighting in French, I don't think I've caught a word of it," he explained, feeling relieved. Their fights had been legend throughout Hogwarts for the first few years. Rage and spells flung that would have the school buzzing for days and even the professors hesitated to intervene. 

It was when they had stopped fighting that the relationship had really started dying. 

"Well perhaps if you bothered to learn it," Regulus said wryly.

"You can't talk to him like that!" Sirius snarled.

Remus picked up Sirius's mug and shoved into his chest, "I can handle him myself, focus on your own feelings towards your brother, don't worry about mine."

"Fine," Sirius grumbled, putting his hand around Remus's wrist, "He's been living with you for nearly a month, then."

"At the Weasleys, almost entirely as a cat," Remus said gently and stepped closer to him, "He has - he has been so helpful with Harry. And I meant what I said - Dursley tried to slam the door in my face, Regulus was the one who got in and found him in that fucking cupboard…"

"I don't like it."

"We don't have the luxury of liking things yet - we're still figuring out surviving," Remus pointed out grimly, "At least that's where I am."

"Speaking of which - weren't you two going to figure out custody? So you could take the boy here each night instead of you two separating?" Regulus piped up, sipping the tea he'd been given.

Sirius frowned at his brother then realized what he had said and looked at Remus eagerly, "Really? That's the plan?"

"Yes… but I should point out it was his idea," Remus said sheepishly. 

He eyed his brother critically for a moment then nodded, "Okay. Alright. We can figure this out."

Chapter Text

Their first action was to speak with McGonagall again. She had seemed to be on Remus's side, and was more familiar with what was going on during the war. It was also less daunting than walking into the Ministry, especially after they had sentenced Sirius without a trial.

She was able to see them that afternoon, and shook Sirius's hand when she saw him. "You don't know how glad I am to see you out of that terrible place," she told him with a rare bit of open fondness. 

"Now I did expect this," she continued, returning to her business-like attitude and gesturing for them to sit down, "It does change things quite a bit, but I would like to stress that the Weasleys are quite an invaluable support right now - raising Harry will not be an easy task."

"We don't have to be there full time, though," Remus pointed out, "At night - it doesn't make a difference where he is, really."

Minerva nodded and smiled at him, "I had told you that it was mostly to let you get your bearings with him - and we'd reevaluate in a few months. Now you'll have help, and it makes sense to return to your own home."

The two men shared a glance and smiled, relieved it was going so well.

"You will need to add a second bedroom to the home, of course," she continued.

"I can sleep on the couch, it's fine," Sirius insisted, not wanting to explain that Padfoot didn't even really need a bed.

"I meant for the boy," she looked at him over her glasses, "I am responsible for hundreds of teenagers, Mr. Black, I am not scandalized by the thought of two men sharing a bed - however Harry is nearly 18 months old and it will not be long before he needs his own bedroom."

"That isn't- we're not-" Sirius stuttered, his face turning red.

"There's plenty of land to expand as much as we need to," Remus said firmly, "But - one thing we need to figure out is what's going on officially. Are we formally his guardians? Can we make these decisions without permission? If he gets sick or hurt and needs St Mungo's- can we handle that without alerting anyone?"

"Ah, yes," Minerva gave a heavy sigh and shook her head, "This war has lasted over a decade - and I'm sure you know that some rogue death eaters have still struck," her face went stony for a moment, "Too many children have lost their parents - and our world has never had a proper way to track children under the age of 11."

There was a moment of somber silence before she continued, "The magical world has relied too heavily on blood ties, tapestries, and the hubris of believing our kind are sturdier and not prone to muggle weaknesses. As a result - we do not have systems in place for displaced children. The Ministry used to handle the handful of cases individually, and then families were being slaughtered and it fell by the wayside."

"That's why Dumbledore was able to completely disregard the will," Sirius said, his voice tight.

"It is," she said, her lips pressed into a thin line, "In the case of Mr. Potter, there has also been the concern of making his residence a matter of public record. While I can assist you in arranging the proper paperwork through the Ministry - you must be prepared for the scrutiny it may bring."

"As long as I don't fill out the location anywhere, it won't undo the Fidelius, I think the security of it being handled officially is worth it," Remus said, looking over at Sirius to check his opinion.

"I agree, now that my name has been cleared I imagine everyone will expect him to be staying with us - it wasn't a secret the role we had in Lily and James's life," Sirius added. 

"Very well. Over the winter holidays, lads, we will get that arranged," Minerva said solemnly.

"Before we go - you said that only children over 11 are monitored by the ministry," Remus said gently, "But muggle borns - doesn't that mean they're at great risk of becoming obscurials? Most obscurials die before they're 10."

Minerva looked him directly in the eyes, her face grave, "That would be correct, Mr. Lupin."

He had no further questions.

—

The plan was to go straight from Hogwarts to the Burrow, and Sirius wasn't comfortable flooing into the Weasley's living room just yet. He hadn't known them well during the war, knocking on the front door just seemed like common courtesy. Remus didn't argue, glad for the walk to Hogsmeade this demanded. 

"Erm - sorry if it makes you uncomfortable, people assuming we're sharing a bed," Sirius had said after they'd turned the first corner, both of them easily finding their way around the castle that had been their home for 7 years.

"We've shared a bed on and off since we were 13," Remus pointed out with a chuckle.

"You know what I mean - what they think," Sirius scoffed, rolling his eyes, "I know that's never been your thing." He kept his tone light, but it had a bitter tinge to it.

Remus took a long breath and nodded, "I don't mind when it's you," he said quietly. 

Sirius frowned at him then looked ahead, saying nothing in response. 

"When we get to Hogsmeade… there's something I should probably talk to you about," Remus said, also looking straight ahead, trying not to catch sight of the other man from the corner of his eyes.

The walk was uncomfortable for a few moments, but they were in Hogwarts. It was hard not to fall into discussing their memories. Laughing at some of them, while others made their hearts clench at the raw pain. This had started to become more routine for Remus, but the time in Azkaban had impacted the grieving process and Sirius was still getting used to it.

"It feels wrong without them," he commented as they walked along the path towards the gate.

"I don't think that's ever going away," Remus said, pausing to look at the forest where the Marauders had run wild on so many full moons.

"I should have been there for the last full. That was a terrible night- could see it through the barred windows, dementors had a bloody field day," Sirius muttered, curling in on himself slightly, his shoulders hunched like a dog's hackles. 

"Yeah…" Remus breathed out, remembering how the last full had gone, "You're here now, at least. That's something." It's more than they get , he thought but didn't voice. He was fairly confident both of them would happily trade places with James and Lily if they could. He wasn't sure when that feeling would go away.

"And no more war," he said with a lopsided smile that didn't meet his eyes, "No reason for me to miss another."

"No reason for me to leave, either," Remus agreed softly, lacing their fingers together and this time the smile was more genuine.

"So, there's something you should probably talk to me about?" Sirius asked as they crossed through the gates.

Remus snorted, smirking at the impatience. He bit his lip and ran a hand through his hair as he pulled Sirius out of the middle of the walkway. Not that there was much traffic into or out of the castle.

"I don't- this is probably the wrong time to bring it up, but waiting for a good time - everything ends up falling apart first," he said a bit bitterly.

"How long have you been waiting?" 

"Em, well, that sounds worse than what it was - because I wasn't sure there was anything to talk about. It seemed like it in fifth year and then," he waved his hand and Sirius grimaced, there was no need to lay out the prank, "Then there was the war and by the time I trusted you again you'd stopped trusting me…"

"We kind of lost 5 years, didn't we?" Sirius asked, putting his hands in his pockets and shaking his head.

Remus nodded grimly, thinking about everything else they had lost and how many people had lost more. It didn't feel like the right time to have this conversation. Maybe the only good time had been 5 years ago in that blessed spell between his friends mastering the animagus transformation and Sirius's mistake.

"Anyways, I haven't been sure there was anything to tell and didn't want to hurt you if I was wrong - but, yeah, I've never really fancied anyone - and I think I fancy you." He felt like an awkward teenager again, his cheeks hot and his palms a bit sweaty and he scuffed his shoe against the cobblestones they were standing on.

"Oh," Sirius said in a small puff of breath, "What does that mean? For you?"

Remus rolled his lips together, glancing briefly at Sirius's face between looking back down at the road, "I'm not sure - I know I want to kiss you, and I'm curious about more - but I've never felt the way other people have and there might be some things I just never like and I don't want to disappoint you -"

His spiraling was interrupted by two hands on his cheeks and lips on his. It was chaste and brief, Sirius pulled away and hovered. Remus could feel Sirius's breath on his face, smell his scent, and without thinking he pushed forward to press their lips together again. 

He had kissed people before, a few times. It had been alright. If he got on with the person well enough it wasn't unpleasant, nothing he'd seek out but not a terrible way to spend time. This was different. It was overwhelming, he could feel it across his body and it left him dizzy. He wanted more, felt the urge for his hands to wander, the desire to be closer.

At some point, Sirius laughed and peppered kisses across his face before pulling back and grinning at him, "You're not gonna disappoint me, Moonymine."

—

They made their way to the Burrow. This time, Sirius was more in the lead as Remus was still in his head, hands to his lips and brow furrowed as he tried to make sense of what had just happened and everything else that was his current life.

"Hey," Sirius said once they were at the edge of the wards, kissing his cheeks, "You need to be here for this, yeh?"

"Huh? Oh," he mumbled, shaking his head to clear his thoughts before nodding, "Is this too fast? Should we give Harry more time? What if he regresses again and can't sleep or -"

Once again he was silenced with a chaste kiss, and Sirius fully pulled back and gave him a sympathetic look, "It's okay if you need more time. I'm a big boy, I'll be fine on my own for awhile."

"If that were true you would've taken your dreamless sleep potion last night," Remus pointed out, raising an eyebrow.

Sirius's eyes went wide in shock and then he gave a bark of a laugh, "That little sneak grassed me up!" He just shrugged, "Didn't need it."

"Poppy said it'd help you recover faster - it's just a few nights," Remus pointed out with a huff, rolling his eyes. 

They bumped their shoulders together and were back again, the previous tension settled and they made their way to the front door while continuing to bicker over the potion. It was nearly dinner time and, after saying hello to Harry and the Weasley children, Remus began helping Molly in the kitchen while Sirius played with Harry - which, of course, soon meant he was the center of attention of the 6 Weasley boys. 

Fortunately, Minerva had reached out and already explained things to them. Molly was supportive and understanding.

"After the first week, I knew he wouldn't be staying with us permanently," she said fondly then chuckled lightly, "It would have been the first hour - but goodness, you were so terrified… not that I blame you, of course."

Remus blushed, feeling guilty as he remembered what a wreck he had been.  She just put a comforting hand on his arm and smiled at him, "You've done well, really you have."

He just nodded, wondering if he'd ever actually believe it. 

They left after dinner, so Harry could do his bedtime routine at Remus's and hopefully have an easier time settling in. It also let them slip off while the children were distracted, not wanting to get Harry overstimulated with a hoard of goodbyes. It felt strange. Harry had spent exactly one night at his place and it had been a disaster, leaving the Burrow felt like losing a safety net - even just for the night it made him nervous.

When they came through the floo, Regulus was curled up in an armchair and reading a book. He glanced up lazily, at least until Harry saw him and giggled, reaching for him. Both of the Black brothers froze at this, and Remus simply placed Harry in the man's lap, carefully taking the book from his hand without losing his place. Regulus blinked at the boy, then brushed the soot off him before finally letting himself return the offered affection, rubbing their noses together and asking him about his day.

Sirius had not moved from the spot, watching his brother in disbelief, until Remus nudged him and just smiled. 

"I told you he's been really helpful," he said softly, keeping his gaze on Sirius, "He's nervous because you're here, though, so be nice."

Sirius nodded slowly, frowning before meeting Remus's eyes, "When Harry was born - well, when Lily was pregnant - I kept panicking that I wouldn't know what to do with him, I wouldn't be good around him, because…" his face darkened for a moment and he took a shaky breath, "They kept telling me it'd come naturally and they were right - I guess, seeing Reggie…" Sirius looked down, "Why were our parents so awful if it's so bloody natural?"

Remus kissed his temple and pulled him in for a hug, "They were horrible. It was nothing wrong with you."

"How can you be sure?" he muttered.  It was a conversation they'd had a few times over the years. Rare, usually Sirius's bravado meant he would sneer at how horrible his parents were and brush off the insults from purebloods who saw him as a traitor. Sometimes, though, that broken little boy still trapped with his parents would peer out and wonder what was so wrong with him.

Remus smiled this time, ruffling Sirius's hair, "I want you to remember the worst thing you ever did in that house - look at Harry, and tell me if you'd give him the same punishment your parents gave you."

  Sirius's breath caught in his throat and he just buried his face in Remus's neck to hide the tears.

—

It was a week later and Remus's alarm had just gone off, informing him it was time to get to work. With some difficulty he managed to smack the button - not sure if it was going to snooze or was fully off - and groaned slightly as he was faced with the colossal task of getting out of bed.

This struggle was not due to the effects of the moon, nor any illness. No, it was because he was apparently the most comfortable mattress in the entire house.

Soft fur tickled his chin, combined with soft purring as the large black cat was stretched out across his shoulders and right arm. The messy haired toddler was curled up on his stomach, breathing steady and deep. Then his legs were covered with the large, black dog.

It was not the first morning he had woken up like this. He suspected it would not be the last. Somehow Harry was easier to move than the two animagi, except that Remus couldn't reach him without moving Regulus whose cat form was actually heavier than Harry.

"C'mon, Reg," he complained, trying to shift the cat with minimal incident, "I don't want to wake up Haz."

The cat growled for a moment before finally slinking off him with a haughty twitch of his tail before turning back to human.

"I still don't see why you keep going to that job," Regulus grumbled, helping to dislodge Remus's legs. The dog grunted but didn't wake up.

Remus rolled his eyes as he gently shifted Harry onto the bed, close to Padfoot. With some small fussing the boy rearranged himself to be curled up in the fur. He planted a small kiss on Harry’s head and another on Regulus's, "I've told you - you don't have to understand. It's helping me keep my bearings. Now are you coming today or staying?"

"Those bloody twins are plotting something to do with my fur and I'm not keen on going back to the Burrow without you," Regulus replied with a huff. Harry had returned to the Weasley’s for at least a few hours each day, with some combination of his guardians. While this was more manageable, the twins in particular had stopped regarding Remus as an authority now that he no longer lived there and were getting up to more mischief.

Remus looked him over for a moment, about to point out that Regulus could always take the day to himself if he liked. Something held him back and instead he just nodded, "Well, it's always nice to have your company at the shop. Help me with breakfast then, yeh?"

"Of course, I'm still not convinced my brother could cook an egg to save his life," he replied with a smirk that was just a little too fond.