Chapter Text
it was happening again and I didn't know how to handle it.
The scene a few meters away from him could be considered normal or even adorable for other people but not for Hyunjin, movie nights were supposed to bring them closer together and relax but how could he relax with the sight of Felix snuggling with Changbin clinging to his arm like a koala
He wanted nothing more than to march towards them and claim his place in Felix's arms but was it really his place? Sure, they had shared a few intimate things that friends wouldn't really do and Hyunjin was very obvious about his crush on the freckled boy but Felix had yet to give any indication that he felt the same way, so Hyunjin was forced to ignore his jealousy and looking away
Hyunjin clearly remembered the day it all started, everyone had been really tired and stressed from the amount of hours they spent practicing choreography and the other half of the time they had to be in interviews or presentations, of course they loved their job but sometimes they just they needed a break
He clearly remembered the moment they shared that day in the practice room, everything was silent and almost empty except for the two boys lying on the floor covered in sweat from going over the Maniac choreography over and over again.
"You didn't have to stay with me" Felix broke the comfortable silence between them.
"Someone has to take care that you don't overdo it" Hyunjin smiles at the weak sound of protest from the other boy and turns his head in his direction, facing him.
"Mm, always taking care of me Jinnie" he moved a little until he could rest his head on Hyunjin's arm and before the taller one protested he quickly put his arm around his slim waist
"Always being clingy Yongbok" Hyunjin pretended to be against this display of affection but quickly gave up wrapping his own arms around Felix.
they stayed hugged for a few long minutes just enjoying each other's presence and Felix had closed his eyes at some point but Hyunjin couldn't take his gaze away from the Australian boy, his blonde hair felt so soft between his fingers, his breathing was a little heavy and his cheeks were red, both of which were due to the dance but what caught Hyunjin's attention the most were the soft and appetizing looking lips in front of him as well as the small freckles scattered across the blond's handsome face
"Why are you looking at me so much?"
"I want to kiss your freckles"
The words were said so spontaneously surprising them both, Hyunjin took a few seconds to process that he really had said it out loud and was about to panic and apologize, Felix on the other hand recovered from his initial surprise and laughed lightly taking one of hyunjin's hands
"All of them?"
"Uh...Well" Felix's question took him by surprise and he stuttered a little nervously "Well yeah, they're so cute... they're like little stars on your face."
"Oh" Felix looked at Hyunjin surprised by how sincere his voice sounded and smiled rubbing his knuckles as he got closer to his face "Go ahead Jinnie, you can do it"
"Can?"
Hyunjin watched Felix nod as he closed his eyes and waited a bit to see if Felix would back down but when that didn't happen he took a deep breath approaching him, carefully taking the blonde's face between his hands as if it were something extremely valuable and shyly began to distribute small kisses on Felix's face
"Jinnie"
The blonde's giggle gave Hyunjin a little more confidence, his lips kissed Felix's nose slowly and then he kissed his cheeks making sure to kiss each one of the freckles in that place and when that was done he kept pressing kisses all over him. foreign face until it reaches his lips
"Hyunjin" Felix's laughter had diminished as he felt Hyunjin get closer to his mouth and when he felt his warm breath crash against it he couldn't help but get closer to him
"Bokie" It was the only word he could pronounce because seconds later the blonde's lips were searching for his desperately
"Damn, I love it when you call me that"
Hyunjin had always imagined that his first kiss with Felix would be more romantic and shy but he definitely wasn't complaining about this. The kiss was passionate and tender at the same time, the way Felix took control of his lips made her legs soar. Hyunjin trembled, it was like a thirsty man took his first drink of water in a long time and could only cling to Felix's shirt longing for more.
That was the beginning of this secret "relationship" between them, Hyunjin had expected more, he believed that things between them would change and that their feelings were reciprocated, however, the fourth time they kissed, Felix had expressed how happy he was to be able to release tension with a friend
However, they were not limited to just kissing and Little by little they began to explore more things until they were ready to go all the way, Hyunjin had thought that it would be the first time for the other but he was surprised to learn that Felix already had experience and he I show when I let him get over it for the first time
"You are so beautiful"
"Y-Yongbok... Mmh" Felix's deep voice was doing things to Hyunjin, His back suddenly arched as the blonde hit his sweet spot "Oh god felix!"
"I found it" Felix chuckled holding onto Hyunjin's hips hard enough to leave an imprint and thrusting his own hips against the older man's tight warmth over and over again being guided by Hyunjin's moans "Jinnie Jinnie... Y-you feel so good"
"Yongbok" Hyunjin's hands clung to Felix's back repeating gasping sounds of "ah ah ah" and A loud cry left his lips as suddenly his nipple was engulfed in the moisture from Felix's mouth "I'm coming. ..I-I'll come"
"Go ahead love" Felix was already at his limit alone with the sounds that Hyunjin emitted and the force with which he squeezed his member were about to make it explode "Come for my princess"
Hyunjin didn't know if it was because of the spanking he received or it was the nickname that Felix used, but at that moment he spilled forcefully on their chests, being followed by Felix who seconds later spilled into the condom with a growl that left Hyunjin looking forward to round two
The sex was amazing and it had opened up a wonderful new world for Hyunjin but there were also the other moments that he loved.
The times they hid in their rooms together and had movie marathons snuggled in bed, the times Hyunjin would discreetly hold Felix's hand when no one was looking, when they had their little lunch dates or just sharing a look. they made hyunjin fall deeper and deeper for felix
But despite all that, Hyunjin's feelings seemed to continue to be unrequited. All the moments they shared together, he knew that Felix also did it with the other members, except for sex (Hyunjin hoped so) and the biggest obvious problem was the huge Felix's crush on Changbin
Hyunjin wanted to believe that he was special to Felix and for a few moments he felt that way but then Felix proclaimed his love for Changbin, when he spent time with Hyunjin he was quickly dumped having a chance to snuggle with Changbin when they had to share rooms on some show Felix would fight for it sharing a room with him and even though that was not always achieved it still sent a pang of pain to Hyunjin's chest, he loved watching felix bake and could do it all day but then felix would start rambling about how he would make the sweetest brownies and fluffy for changbin
She had confessed her feelings to Felix just a few hours ago in her bed with their bodies tangled together enjoying the mist of her orgasm.
"You're amazing Jinnie"
"Bokie" he rolled onto her side so she could face Felix and reached out her hand caressing the blonde's chest with a bright smile on her face "I love you"
"I know Jinnie" he looked at Hyunjin giving him a small smile and kissed his forehead before starting to get up "Let's take a shower before movie night"
Hours later there was Hyunjin wondering if he would have an adequate answer and Felix seemed very happy just existing in Changbin's arms
Maybe it was time for Hyunjin to understand his place in Felix's life, he knew he loved him but he could never love him the way Hyunjin did and it was better that Hyunjin started to forget his feelings for Felix after all one day He would tell his feelings to Changbin, if he walked away now maybe it would hurt less
With that in mind, Hyunjin made the decision to get away from Felix at least until his feelings disappeared and they could return to their normal friendship.