Work Text:
Hunter took a deep breath, pulling himself out of his bed. Rolling over to face the other side of his room, he noticed the note on his blanket, nearly stopping his heart.
Coming out day.
He stared at the three-ring binder that Camila had got him for his sewing patterns. Since returning to the demon realm, he refurbished it as his “Coming Out Binder”. Luz had used a slideshow to come out to her mom as bisexual, so he elected to use the same strategy. Though, of course, he didn’t have access to ‘PowerPoint’ which Luz made hers on. The binder would do. He smiled. Everyone had been really supportive of her and Amity. And Willow when she came out as pansexual. And Raine when they, well, existed. They were the only person that Hunter knew who could be considered transgender. Them and Mascha. He curled himself into a little ball. He didn’t know why, but he was shaking. His hands were cold and sweaty. And he could barely breathe. “Stop being stupid, Hunter! He’ll accept you!” He whispered the words loud enough that he could hear them, but his guardian, Darius, couldn’t hear it through the thin walls of their house.
Just calm down. Give it a few minutes. Then go tell him. 1…2…3…4…4…3…2…1… Just breathe, Hunter. You can do this.
He decided that while he waited, he might as well scroll through Penstagram. He picked up his scroll, which had fallen on the floor last night. Opening the app, he noticed that Willow had sent him a message
Hello_willow sent you a message
Hi Hailee! Can’t wait to see you later! Meetcha at the Owl House!
He cringed at the name.
Don’t worry. That’ll probably be the last message with your deadname. You’re telling them today. After Darius.
He felt the itchy, uncomfortable texture of hair against his back, forcing him to hold back tears. Distantly, under all the stress, he heard Belos repeating words in his head.
Stop lying to yourself, Hailee, dear. The titan dislikes when you’re disobedient like this. Go to your room. I have a meeting. We will talk about this later.
At age eleven, when Hunter had tried to tell Belos he was trans, those same words of rejection, followed by the coldness and pain that came after. It all still left fresh scars on his mind. Each day, those same words echoed in his mind, increasing his fear that Darius and his friends would react the same.
“Come on, just go out there and say it, you big baby!” He whisper-shouted to himself. “Go talk to him.”
They never acted that way with Raine. There’s no reason they will with you.
1…2…3…4…
4…3…2…1…
1…2…3…4…
4…3…2…1…
Steadying his breathing, he wished more than anything that Flapjack was there to comfort him. Distantly, he felt his friend reassuring him that it all would turn out fine. He pulled on his Cosmic Frontier hoodie that Camila had given him and picked up the binder. This was it.
Stepping into the kitchen, he saw Darius standing at the stove, cooking something that smelled of cinnamon and sugar. “Good morning, Hailee!” His voice was cheerful and energetic.
He definitely discovered coffee
Hunter giggled a bit at his own bad joke.
“I’m making something called French Toast. Camila taught me, Raine, and Eda, how to make it the last time she visited with Luz.”
Hunter smiled before taking a deep breath and preparing himself. “Hey, Darius… could I, uh… talk to you? When you’re done of course… um,” He hesitated, trying not to stutter, but failing.
“Of course, we can. Just let me put this in the oven quick, then we can talk.” The older man changed his expression, matching Hunter’s serious tone. He nervously clutched his book in his hand.
1…2…3…4…
4…3…2…1…
1…2…3…4…
4…3…2…1…
—-------------------------------------------
Darius’ mind was racing.
Why in Titan’s name does she sound so nervous?
Oh god!
Please don’t be pregnant! Please please PLEASE don’t be pregnant! I’m not ready to be a grandfather!
He turned around and saw his daughter holding a binder with some sort of flag that he didn’t recognize. The cover also had words, but Hailee’s arms were covering them.
“Hey, Darius. I, uh, made this…” She reached out her hands towards Darius, shaking slightly. He took the binder from her hands. On the cover, the words read ‘Hi, I’m Hunter’. He looked up, confused. He noticed that her eyes were glossy with tears and she was shaking uncontrollably now. He wanted to ask what this was about but decided not to press, instead opening the binder and beginning to read. Inside the first page was an author's note and a table of contents.
“Dear Darius, Luz, Willow, Gus, Amity, Camila, Eda, and Raine,
Hi. I’m Hunter. You’ve known me as Hailee for the longest time, but I’m here to set the record straight. I’m trans. There will be more info on what transgender means on page three so don’t worry if you’re confused. To put it in simple terms, I was born in the wrong body. I was born a girl, but am a guy. Once you’re finished looking through this book, I’m willing to answer any questions you may have. Just know that I’m still the same kid you met however long ago it was.
Thank you for reading,
Hunter”
Darius smiled as he looked at the table of contents.
What does transgender mean?
What are the implications?
I just dropped a bomb so please take a break and enjoy these cookies I made at 3 am!
Darius giggled at that one.
What I need from you guys as my family
Scrapbook
And
Thank you
Darius sat down at the table, motioning for Hailee no Hunter to follow suit. As he flipped through the pages, he felt question after question forming in his brain, but some of them were answered as he kept reading. He didn’t quite understand it. It wasn’t that he was lost or couldn’t comprehend the words on the page, he just didn’t get it on an emotional level. But if it would make Hunter happy, he would learn everything he could about the topic. Finishing the final few pages, he turned to the scrapbook, feeling his heart soar as he looked through the pictures. There were a bunch of drawings similar to the one on the cover, each showing Hunter with shorter hair.
One with Darius, holding a trans pride flag together
With Luz, Willow, Gus, and Amity, watching a movie.
He looked so happy in the drawings.
“That’s the haircut I kinda want to get.”
“Well, we can take care of that after breakfast.”
“Could we actually wait until I get home later tonight? I want to show this same binder to Luz and them all later.”
“Of course, Hunter.” He saw his son’s face light up when he called him by his name.
“Do…uh… do you have any questions? I know that was…a lot…”
“I do actually. A few. How long have you known?”
Hunter swallowed. “I figured it out when I was six or so.”
“Did Belos know?”
“I… I told him when I was eleven. But he… didn’t take it well… punished me over it… said I was betraying the titan…” Hunter looked down, pain in his eyes.
Darius walked over and gave his son a hug. “Thank you for trusting me.” Hunter flinched but eventually settled into the hug. “I love you, Hunter.”
“I love you too, Dad.”