Archive of Our Own

*beep beep beep*

Mafuyu's alarm clock rang loudly. Which means another day has started for her. It was always wake up, go to school, study, sleep and repeat. Well...that was until she met Kanade. She's known Nightcord for about two and a half years. But for now, she wouldn't get to see them. Her mom found out. About everything. Still, Mafuyu hadn't known that Kanade and her mom had met. Mafuyu got up and saw the empty spot on her desk where her computer usually sat. Not there. It's been like that for a while now. She grabbed her phone and looked through her calendar. She got out of it and saw other things. Blocked of course. She didn't know what she felt, but she knew it wasn't freedom.

"....I need to get ready for school."

Mafuyu got up and headed to her closet. She grabbed her hanging uniform with her black jacket over it. She slipped out of her clothes and put on her uniform. She then threw on her jacket. She went to the bathroom next. She looked at the mirror.

"They're still visible."

Mafuyu rubbed her eye bags. Lately, she's been buying concealer to cover them after what happened. I mean, it was what got her caught after all. How would things be if they weren't there?

"Oh, this is colder than usual."

Mafuyu started to blend out her only form of makeup. It didn't take long, as expected. She next brushed her teeth, which didn't take long either. She left the bathroom and walked into her kitchen, where her mom happened to be. Making breakfast. Since the incident, Mafuyu felt cold around her. It wasn't like before, this time it was worse.

"Oh, good morning Mafuyu! I made your favorite."

"Thank you mom!"

Mafuyu didn't want to have her good girl persona on her at the moment, but she had to. Mafuyu looked down at her plate. Her favorite. Well, what used to be anyway. Mafuyu sat down at her side of the table, prayed, and dug into her food. Nothing. That was to be expected.

"Mm! Mom you always surprise me with how good you cook."

"Fufu, glad to hear that Mafuyu."

That smile...it was one that Mafuyu feared. Her carefree eyes and small smirk was enough to make anyone jump. She was such a woman.

"Well mom, I have to get going. Thank you!"

"Yup, stay safe! Oh one more thing Mafuyu."

"Hm..?"

"What time will you get home?"

"Uh..."

Mafuyu stopped for a second. She knew she was supposed to be home early, but she really didn't want to be. So, she did something she never thought she'd do.

She lied.

Besides, she already had a clear idea on where she'd go when she was out of school.

"Well I have some honor meetings alongside my group activities so I might be home a bit later than usual."

"Ah alright, well I'll let you go now. Safe travels Mafuyu."

"Yup, see you mom."

Mafuyu put on her shoes and headed out. As soon as she shut the door behind her, she felt as if a weight was lifted off her shoulders. The morning breeze outside was reassuring. It felt amazing. Mafuyu started walking on the path she'd walked since, forever. She was so used to it that her legs basically walked themselves. After a bit of walking, Mafuyu finally reached Miya. The first thing she saw was Ichika and Saki near the gate.

"Ah Asahina-senpai. Right on time."

Didn't take Mafuyu too long to turn the other side of her on.

"Hm? Did you need something Hoshino-san?"

"Yes, I have some important things to attend to after our first class with Saki and I was wondering if you'd tell my teacher that we won't be there."

"Yes of course! I'll be sure to tell her before I head to my class."

"Thank you so much Asahina-senpai!"

"Anytime. You too Tenma-san!"

"Yup!"

Ichika and Saki then strolled into the building. Mafuyu noticed that they were holding hands. She didn't know much about their relationship other than they were childhood friends and Ichika loved rambling about Saki often. She did that to Mafuyu without realizing it. For once, Mafuyu felt a bit of something. Envy. She didn't know it herself, but anyone could tell. She was envious of them because they could love and care for each other. Mafuyu yearned for that affection. Mafuyu wanted that affection. She didn't know anyone who'd do that for her. Mafuyu stopped her thoughts and headed to class before the bell rang.

*During class*

"Okay guys, open your textbooks to page 175. We're going to continue where we left off yesterday. We will also go over the questions you had on your report sheet."

Groans filled the classroom as the teacher clapped for everyone to calm down. Mafuyu didn't pay much attention to it considering it happens almost every single day. What Mafuyu didn't get was the lack of emotion in the class after the teacher calmed them down, which was extremely ironic. Mafuyu pulled out her report sheet and stared at it for awhile. Homework...Home.

"Asahina-san? Are you following along?"

"Ah yes, sorry."

"Okay. Stay on track please."

That was the first time Mafuyu had really gotten "told off" by a teacher. She always made sure to not step out of line. I guess today wasn't her day. It was only the first class after all. She just wanted to leave. Leave somewhere safe. Somewhere...Comfortable.

*After first class*

"Alright I need to head to the first year's hall. I wonder what kind of business those two need to attend."

Mafuyu wandered down the hall, humming a melody, Kanade's most recent melody to be exact. After some humming, she finally reached class 1-C. She stepped in and everyone's eyes in that room lit up.

*Class whisperer*

"Oh my gosh! Isn't that Mafuyu Asahina?"

"Yeah that's her! She's the smartest person in this whole school apparently!"

"I also heard that she's amazing at sports!"

"Isn't she a class representative? Just like Hoshino-san!"

Mafuyu and sighed a bit and then turned to the teacher.

"Asahina-san, it's not often we see down this hall, what do you need?"

"Nothing much, just a favor someone offered me. You see, Hoshino-san and Tenma-san are going to not be here next class for some business and they needed me to ask you."

"Oh I see. Well thank you so much for telling me. I'll send your regards to those two."

"Oh you're too kind! But thank you as well."

Mafuyu walked out and took a deep sigh. She'd been used to people commenting about her but today just felt off. Like earlier, I guess today wasn't her day after all.

*Lunch*

After her class, Mafuyu went out into the school yard and sat down and ate her lunch. Nothing. Again. She didn't know why she finally expected something to happen after all this time. She'd been like this for almost three to four years....It felt like her whole life to her. Mafuyu kept staring at her lunch. She wondered how things would be if her mom didn't want her to excel at everything. How would things be if she knew herself? How would things be...if she didn't meet Nightcord. Suddenly, a voice broke her from her staring.

"Asahina-san?"

"A-Ah Hinomori-san! Do you need something..?"

"No but...are you feeling okay?"

"O-oh yeah...just pretty tired, guess I studied to late last night."

"...if you say so. Well, now that we're both here, want to eat lunch together?"

"Yeah, let's."

After some eating and talking in between, Mafuyu could feel her chest getting a bit lighter. She felt cold and dark around her mother, but when she was around people who considered her a friend, she felt warm and safe. The moment Mafuyu was having was ruined by the bell.

"Oh that's the bell..."

"Hehe, did you hope you'd eat longer?"

"Yeah, I guess I was busy talking to you Asahina-san!'

"You sure were!"

Mafuyu and Shizuku wrapped their lunch back and started walking to class.

"Oh, I have to go this way, good talking to you Asahina-san."

"Yup you too! Good luck in class."

They both went their separate ways and walked inside their classrooms. Mafuyu let out another deep sigh.

"...Just a few more hours and I can get out of this hell."

A few minutes into class and the room was dead silent already. The paperwork was already passed out. They had the rest of the class time to finish it. Mafuyu wrote answers effortlessly and rested her head in her left hand while writing with her right. She looked out the window beside her. Very sunny outside.

*Whisper*

"Heh...Kanade would die in this weather."

Mafuyu let out a small laugh and got back to work. The teacher got everyone's attention after a bit and everyone sighed. Mafuyu was too busy thinking about other stuff she didn't want to. She almost never got distracted at school. She made sure to anyway.

"Okay, pass your papers forward. If it's not done you will have points reducted."

*Class*

"Ahh! I'm going to fail this I know it!!!"

"Haha, maybe if you studied hard enough you wouldn't!"

"Oh says you!"

The classroom filled with laughter as the teacher put her head into her hand. Soon enough, the bell rang once more.

"Okay remember guys! There's a school meeting tomorrow at 6pm! If you can't make, please let us know in advance!"

Oh that's right. The school meeting they had every month. They discussed possible methods of work for next year or fun activities and such. It was a bit of everything. It was all first, second, and third years including a few staff.

*Cleaning time*

Finally, it was almost the end of the day. Mafuyu couldn't wait to go where she wanted. For now, she had to clean. Yesterday she wiped windows. Today, she'll be sweeping. She started at the entrance at the shoe lockers. She sweeped and sweeped and sweeped. After that, she heard another voice.

"WWAAAAHHHH!!!"

A loud young scream came from the other side of the school. Mafuyu knew that scream all too well.

"Asahina-senpai!!!! HELP ME!!!!"

"O-Otori-san what's wrong?"

"I lost my pencil case that I got from a friend and I haven't found it yet!!!"

"Oh no! when did you last have it?"

"During English...please help me Asahina-senpai!!!"

"Hehe, don't worry I will, come on let's go look in the classroom."

"Okay..."

Mafuyu set her broom down against the wall and followed Emu to the classroom. They both searched high and low but they had no luck.

"Ah look at the time Asahina-senpai! It's been so long and we still haven't found it...if you have somewhere to be, you can go. I can keep looking..."

Mafuyu really did have somewhere to be, but she felt like she needed to keep looking with Emu.

"No, it's okay. I'll keep looking with you."

"R-Really??"

"Yup!"

Mafuyu let out her sweet smile and Emu jumped up in fear. She still couldn't get over Mafuyu's fake smile...

*After some time*

"AH!! Asahina-senpai!"

"Otori-san? Did you find it?"

"Yeah I did!"

"Oh great! Thank goodness."

"I know right! Thank you so much for helping. I owe you Asahina-senpai!"

"Hehe, no need. I'm just doing what I need to. Well I have to go, have a nice evening."

"Yup! You too!"

Mafuyu went to her classroom, grabbed her bag, and went back to the shoe lockers and picked up the broom. It was 5:40pm. She didn't have much time. She quickly put away the broom and started to head out of the school.

*Buzz buzz*

"Hm?"

Mafuyu grabbed her phone and saw a text message her mom sent her.

"Hey Mafuyu, me and your father have a meeting at a diner and we won't be home till very late. You'll have to make your own dinner."

Jackpot. Not only was it better because it was Friday, but now that her parents weren't going to be home till probably midnight or later, meant that she had way more time. This was her lucky time. Mafuyu texted her mom back.

"Okay, thanks for letting me know, have fun."

Before Mafuyu put away her phone, she looked at her home screen once again. Everything she had besides what her mom thought was important was gone. Mafuyu sighed and put her phone in her bag. Mafuyu then started walking towards a familiar street.

*After some walking*

"I'm here. I can't believe how close it is to the school."

Mafuyu stepped in front of the building door and knocked three times. She felt a bit shaky for some reason. I mean, this was the first time she'd shown up at her own will. A few minutes went by before the door gently opened.

"...M-Mafuyu?!"

"Hi Kanade."

Kanade stood in the doorway in shock. She hadn't seen Mafuyu in a long time, she was so glad that she was okay. But her eyes seemed...darker than usual. A little more dead.

"Y-You're okay!"

Kanade threw her arms over Mafuyu and hugged her tight. Very tight. Maybe a little too tight for Kanade's comfort but she still didn't let go.

"K-Kanade? Of course I'm okay."

Kanade quickly broke away from the hug and started blushing a bit.

"Sorry it just feels like I haven't seen you in years...also......"

Kanade realized what she was about to say and quickly stopped herself.

"Hm? Also what?"

"N-Nothing! it's not important. H-Here come in!"

Kanade stuttered. A lot. She would've been absolutely torn if Mafuyu found out about what happened between her and Mafuyu's mother. She couldn't and wouldn't let it slip. Kanade shook her head leading Mafuyu inside to avoid the thought of that popping back into her head. Kanade then led Mafuyu to the living where they both sat on the couch. Though on separate ones.

"...So Mafuyu! What brought you here? Don't you have cram school?"

"No, I don't have anything going on considering the school meeting happening tomorrow."

"School...meeting?"

"Yeah. We discuss skills and practices for next year. Along with some fun activities like festivals and such."

"Ooh. That sounds pretty fun. Almost makes me wish I could go to it."

"Well I have seen kids from other schools show up because sometimes we incorporate other kids for more fun. For example, the Kamiyama kids."

"Hehe, the problem is...I don't go to school."

"That's true. Still, there could be a possibility."

Kanade looked longingly at Mafuyu. Kanade felt like she saw Mafuyu's eyes glow just a bit brighter. She always did that. Noticed small details in her face that is. She's been like that ever since she's been with Mafuyu. I guess Kanade was looking for too long because Mafuyu then stopped and waved her hand in front of Kanade's face.

"Kanade?"

"Oh! Sorry..."

"It's fine, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just...can't remember how long it's been since we talked like this, y'know?"

"I get what you mean. It's been a while since I actually talked to someone so comfortably."

Kanade's eyes lowered in disappointment. She felt horrible for putting Mafuyu through this. Part of what Mafuyu was feeling and experiencing was because of her. She whispered under her breath.

"I'm to blame for a bit of that..."

"Huh?"

"....I'll get us some tea."

"Kanade-"

Kanade stood up and went to the kitchen before Mafuyu could finish. Kanade's back was turned to Mafuyu. Kanade didn't really know how to make tea but Honami tried to teach her once. She mostly just wanted an excuse to not face Mafuyu for that moment. Kanade looked unhappy. Upset. Very upset. Mafuyu looked at Kanade's back and gave a concerned and stern face. Ever since Mafuyu even knocked at that door, Kanade had been acting strange. She couldn't feel but wonder if she had something to do with it.

*Many minutes later*

"Here, tea's finished

"Oh, thank you."

Mafuyu poured some tea into her cup and blew into it a bit. Kanade did the same. It was pretty silent. Well that was until...

"Uh-mm..!"

"Kanade, are you okay?"

"I think I made the tea wrong. It tastes gross..."

"Really? I don't taste anything."

"Well that's pretty normal for you...I think I'll just set my cup to the side. You can keep having some if you'd like."

"Okay. I'm thirsty anyway."

*Clock ticking*

"Kanade, do you mind if I study in your room."

"Huh? Don't you study at home. Wait...what time is it? Is it past your curfew? How did you even get away with coming-"

"Shh. My parents probably aren't coming home till midnight. So I have loads of time to kill here. I don't...like being home. And how I got here....I lied to my mom about having to stay after school."

"Mafuyu, you're telling me you...rebelled?"

"I don't know. I just didn't feel like going home. After all that's happened."

"Oh. Makes sense..."

"Hm? What do you mean it makes sense..."

"Uh...let's just go to my room! You can study and I need to compose! Come on, I'm sure you have lots of work..."

Kanade quickly grabbed Mafuyu's wrist and led her to the room. Kanade picked up an area of her room where Mafuyu could sit and work. Mafuyu kneeled at the small ground table and turned on the small lamp on it. She grabbed her school bag and got out notebooks. During this Kanade was sitting down at her computer and put on her headphones. They both then started to work. Quietly. Mafuyu was suspicious of Kanade at this point. The way she talked was off, her stance, her glare, and her somehow, well possibly, knowing Mafuyu's situation when she hasn't told anyone...

"Kanade?"

"Mm..."

"Kanade.."

"Mmm....."

"Kanade!"

"Mm...Fine fine! I can't anymore..."

"Whats wrong. You've been so off lately. Also...how do you know about.."

"Look. I promised another person we'd both not say anything so I can't really..."

"But, I want to know. I feel like I need to know. I'm not sure."

Kanade took off her headphones and looked at Mafuyu in the eyes. She joined Mafuyu kneeling down at her small table. She took a deep sigh and hugged her stomach tight.

"Mafuyu I...I meet your mom."

".....What?"

"I-I...she contacted me and told us to meet. She seemed nice at first but then...she was cold. Extremely cold. There was so much pressure. She wanted you to stop music because of studies and such. I tried to tell her that you were passionate about music. Though she wouldn't listen so I...I told her about what you're feeling. The real you to be exact. And you wanting to...disappear. I know that was wrong of me b-but I wanted to help you! She blamed all your feelings because of unnecessary stuff like bad grades! I-!"

"K-Kanade...?"

Kanade could feel tears fill her eyes. She looked up at Mafuyu since she had her head down this entire time. Mafuyu had completely lost all light in her eyes. She was still. Kanade couldn't hold it in anymore. She started to sob into her hands while telling her sorry.

"...Kanade why didn't you tell me?!"

"This is why! We both didn't want to worry you!"

"I probably wouldn't have been if you told me sooner! Why Kanade?!"

Mafuyu's voice had risen drastically. This made Kanade want to sob even more.

"Kanade...What were you thinking?!?!"

They both stopped for a second. Kanade lifted her head and Mafuyu covered her mouth with her hand. She was right, what was she thinking? Mafuyu could feel a cold feeling in her. She...yelled at Kanade. She felt like it was right at that moment. Part of her still kind of thought that.

"K-Kanade I-"

"N-no it's okay. I'll...be in the bathroom. You can leave if you want."

Kanade wiped some of her thousands of tears and headed out the door. Mafuyu finally understood what Kanade meant. They were both in the wrong. That didn't change the fact that Mafuyu still needed to apologize. Still, she waited. She wanted to give Kanade some space. Meanwhile, Mafuyu let out some tears. She dug her face into her knees and looked at Kanade's setup. Mafuyu thought for a second and wondered how she'd been treating Kanade with pain while Kanade did everything to help her. Mafuyu was so lucky to have her. But Mafuyu lashed out. She understood why they didn't tell her. At least she thought she did. Mafuyu felt a sensational feeling. Thinking about Kanade being upset at her forever hurt her so much. She didn't know how to confront her was the problem. She had an idea. Mafuyu rubbed her eyes with her jacket sleeves and slowly got up. She headed towards the door, took a deep breath, then stepped out. Mafuyu dragged herself to the bathroom where Kanade told her she'd be.

"...I can't believe I'm going to do this."

Mafuyu lightly knocked on the door. She heard a bit of ruffling but no direct answer.

"Kanade, can I please come in?"

Still, no answer. Mafuyu's eyes turned behind her to the face the wall behind her. She saw pictures hung up. Pictures of Kanade. Not only her, but her mom and dad. Kanade's mom was very pretty. Mafuyu know knew where'd gotten her long white hair from. Mafuyu turned to face the wall directly and sat down in front of the bathroom door. She had her knees in front of her body and her arms over them, crossing.

"Hope you don't mind that I stay here."

"...."

Mafuyu heard some breathing but it was very faint. A few minutes passed by with no conversation between the two. Mafuyu kept staring at the pictures in front of her. Kanade was inside with her head dug into her arms while they were crossed over the tub lining. The bottom half of her body was at an angle with her legs loosely spread on the ground with one ankle over the other. To be honest, Kanade didn't find the position quite comfortable, but it was the first thing she got into when she felt like crying. Kanade was almost going to get sick from all this. She hasn't cried this hard since her dad first got into the hospital.

"Y'know Kanade, you were pretty cute as a child."

Kanade was taken by surprise by this comment. Her crying died a bit, but not too much. Kanade forgot about the pictures hanging throughout the hallway. Kanade blushed and silently let out her first words.

"...Really?"

"Yeah, adorable."

Kanade didn't know this, heck not even Mafuyu herself knew that she was smiling. Just ever so slightly. Kanade gently unlocked and opened the door which made Mafuyu fall backwards. Which also caused a loud thump.

"Ow..."

"A-Ah Mafuyu are you okay?!?!"

"I think so...I just hit my head hard."

"Sorry I didn't know you'd be right against the door..."

"It's fine don't worry."

Kanade let out a small giggle and helped Mafuyu sit up right on her knees facing Kanade. Kanade had also been in her knees

"Any blood?"

"Nope, not from what I could see."

"Thank god. That would've been a lot of explaining to do to my parents."

Kanade got up slowly and reached out her hand to Mafuyu. Mafuyu grabbed her hand and Kanade lifted her up once more. They both walked out of the bathroom and led each other to Kanade's room.

"Kanade."

"Hm..?"

"Sorry...I overreacted a bit..."

"No it's okay, you had every right to be angry."

What both of them hadn't realized was that their hands were linked. For a while as well. Once they reached Kanade's room, Mafuyu swiftly sat back down at the small table. Kanade felt like something was missing. She looked down at her hand. Mafuyu's wasn't there anymore. She looked back up and took notice at what she didn't before. She was blushing a whole lot when she finally understood. They were holding hands without even realizing.

"....what."

"Hm? What'd you say Kanade?"

"N-Nothing important..."

Kanade ran her hands over her face and sat down at her setup. She placed her headphones on her head and got to work. Mafuyu was already working too at this point. It didn't take Mafuyu long for her to focus on work but for Kanade....especially after what happened, she couldn't at all. Kanade looked at the time. This late already?

"Hey Mafuyu. How long do you plan on staying?"

"I don't know, I guess whenever you want me to leave."

"Then...could you stay-"

Kanade held a hand over her mouth before she could finish. She could not believe those words were about to come out of her mouth...

"Stay the night? I really don't mind."

Mafuyu didn't even think about telling her mom anything. She didn't want to go home anyway.

"I-I mean...if you say so, but what about your mom?"

"I'll just tell her I got sick."

"Will that really work...? I mean that's what you said when we went to Phoenix Wonderland a while ago."

"Then I'll think of something else....You really want me to stay huh?"

Kanade blushed at the remark and was speechless. Mafuyu stopped writing and took her eyes off the paper which then led to the door. Mafuyu got up and walked out and stood in the doorway.

"I'm going to get some water."

"O-Okay, there's some bottles in the fridge. I just put them in this morning."

"Thanks."

As soon as Mafuyu left, Kanade glanced at her setup and started wailing into her hands. Mafuyu was actually spending the night. Kanade let the thought sink in, after a few minutes of that, Kanade took off her headphones and threw herself onto the bed next to her. She had forgotten about the sheets of music scattered around the entire bed. Boxes full of them as well.

"Oh no they're all over the place!"

Kanade quickly got off the bed. She was planning on picking up the sheet music. However...

"...Ow! Ugh!! Gosh that really hurt..."

Kanade tripped on her hair and fell straight on her face. Kanade didn't take pain so easily so she was quick to react, with some tears and squeals.

"I think I smashed my nose..."

Kanade held up her hands to her nose trying to wear down the pain, newsflash, that didn't do anything. Guess Kanade was a bit too loud because the next thing she knew Mafuyu came rushing in with a water bottle in hand.

"Kanade! Are you alright?"

"I-I think so....I tripped on something and fell straight on my face."

"Geez, be more careful!"

Mafuyu had a stern tone to her voice. She was actually very worried.

"Well at least we're even now...but you did hit yourself on hard tiles. Bathroom tiles."

"And you hit yourself on hard wood. Bedroom wood."

Kanade laughed a bit. She noticed another small smirk coming from Mafuyu. Kanade blushed a bit and also smiled.

"You're changing a lot Mafuyu."

"I am?"

"Yeah. Almost three years ago, you were saying how you wanted to disappear. Now, you want to do everything you can to find your feelings. You've gotten back on your feet."

"Well that's because I met you Kanade."

"...Yeah. I guess I also played a part in it!"

Mafuyu and Kanade were now both sitting on the edge of the bed. They sat in silence for a bit until Mafuyu fell backwards on the soft, almost sunken in, bed. This time, she fell on purpose.

"Kanade...I don't think you give yourself enough credit. I don't really know how to describe it, but everytime I'm around you or think about you, I get this strange, but strong feeling. I never felt that before. You made me feel it."

Kanade felt her face getting extremely hot. She also let herself lay back and the two girls were now parallel with each other. Kanade was getting a bit sleepy from all the crying she'd been doing this whole night. Her most recent tears made her even more tired than she already was.

"Haahh! It's been so long since I've laid on this bed."

"This isn't your bed, Kanade?"

"No, my dad's. This is my dad's room but I took it up after he...y'know."

"Yeah.....Look I may not have any room to ask this but, how old were you when that happened?"

"Oh...I was about 14 or 15? I can't remember quite well, but I do know I was still in junior high."

"Hm. That was also about the time I lost my sense of self. I can't remember too much as well though."

"Man, junior high was rough for us huh?"

"Sure was."

After they talked, they both started up at the ceiling. It was almost as if they were stargazing...but inside. Kanade was used to people asking about her dad. Her grandparents, old friends, and most importantly, herself. She'd been asking herself over and over if her dad would be okay, as if maybe a reflection of her would come out and tell her he'd been alright. She didn't have anything to lean on anymore. Her mom had been gone for a long time now. Still, Kanade needed to be strong. She had to be there for others too.

"Hello..? Kanade...Wake up."

"Huh? I am awake."

"No you aren't, you feel asleep for like 30 minutes."

"...Seriously?!?! I knew I was tired but I didn't think I'd be that tired!"

"Shush, it's okay. You did a lot today, you should rest up. First, get into some comfortable clothes."

"Oh right...wait. What about you?"

"Hm?"

"Don't you need something comfortable to wear also?"

"Guess so."

"I think I have a set of pajamas somewhere in my closet."

Kanade got up and started to go towards her closet. She opened it up, kneeled down, and started to dig through her pile of clothes under her hung up sweats.

"Ah hah! Found it. My grandma bought these for me but they were too big, I think they'll fit you."

The pajamas were a plain pastel pink. The shirt was short sleeved with a collar and white accents. The shorts were also pastel pink with white lining.

"It looks...."

"Not like me? Yeah I know."

"I think I have similar pajamas to this. We could be matching someday."

Kanade pulled out the pajama set completely and handed it to Mafuyu. Mafuyu clutched it in her hands and convoyed her way to the bathroom. While Mafuyu was changing, Kanade was looking for something to wear. She was digging and digging....and digging. She couldn't find much but she found a plain white shirt and some dark purple shorts.

"This could work. I might be a bit cold though."

Kanade got up and started to change. Next, she threw her clothes in the basket next to the closet. Kanade didn't know what else to do with Mafuyu around. She didn't feel like composing would be good since she felt like it would seem like she's ignoring Mafuyu. It was hard thinking about not composing for the rest of the day, but she did it for Mafuyu. Not only was Kanade bored, but extremely hungry. Now that she wasn't working on music, she could eat peacefully. It was only like that when Honami came by.

"Now that I think about it, what was Mafuyu doing while I was asleep?"

Kanade finished changing at this point and she led herself to the kitchen. As soon as she walked in, she knew what she'd eat. Noodles. While Kanade was setting up the pot to boil water, Mafuyu came out from the bathroom.

"Sorry I...are you cooking?"

"Yeah, I got pretty hungry...want some?"

"Sure why not."

Kanade was getting the water going and she got out another cup of noodles. She didn't know which Mafuyu would want so she just grabbed the same as hers. Mafuyu was sitting down at the kitchen table while Kanade was making the noodles. She knew she wouldn't taste much, but maybe if she was with her...by her, she'd feel something bigger.

"Oh, and sorry I took so long. I was taking off my makeup."

"Makeup? I didn't ever think I'd see you wear it, Mafuyu."

"Me neither to be honest."

"What type of makeup is it?"

"Concealer."

"What does concealer do?"

"It's for hiding imperfections on your skin. An example for me would be my eye bags. That's all I use it for."

"Oooh. That's neat."

"Sure is."

"When did you start wearing it?"

"....After my mom found out I wasn't getting enough sleep. If you know what I-"

"You don't have to finish. I know."

Kanade was leaning against the edge of the counter top while watching for the noodles to finish cooking. Mafuyu was sitting on the side of the table where Kanade could see her face.

"Kanade."

"Yes?"

"What are you going to do with me here? Are you going to keep composing?"

"Eh...I've decided not to since I get way to involved in it. Especially since I thought it might feel like I'm ignoring you."

"Hm. It would've be fine. I don't mind you composing, its your passion anyway."

"Yeah but-"

"Hey can I ask you something?"

"Sure. Ask away!"

"I know we've already talked about a whole bunch of upsetting stuff but what I don't get about you is...why you compose for me."

"Huh..?"

"I used to be some random stranger who knew nothing about you or your relationship with music. We started a group, still as strangers. You felt pity for me even when you barely knew me. I said horrible stuff to you, Ena, and Mizuki. How could forgive me?"

Kanade stopped for a bit. She couldn't believe how Mafuyu just pulled that out so easily. She understood what Mafuyu had gone through. She had for a while. Kanade didn't know what to say.

"You've done so much for me Kanade but...I just don't understand. Why?"

Kanade opened her mouth, but nothing came out for a few seconds. Until she finally spoke, but with a gentle voice. More gentle than usual.

"Because you're very important to me, Mafuyu. I couldn't save my dad, or my mom. I didn't have time to save my mom, and I caused what happened to my dad. I don't want another person to leave me. I don't want you to think it's all over. I want to give multiple people hope since I couldn't do that last time. Twice. I want to give you hope. I know you'll find yourself soon, I just need time."

"..."

"But I'm also scared I'm taking too much time. What if...you run out of hope before I can grant you it?"

"Then I'll just have to be patient till then. I can't seem to accept why my feelings are lost. Kaito said so many things too quickly. I never wanted to say this but...I think he's right. My mom isn't a good person. She doesn't want the best for me. She's just using me. I've finally realized how much weight has been put on my shoulders and....I want to be saved. Especially from what you told me. I trust you on what my mom said. If I throw all your work away, I'll feel miserable. So, I don't care how long it takes. You need time, so I'll give it to you. Okay?"

Mafuyu was looking up at Kanade with her ombre eyes. Kanade had never been understood by someone so...well. She was also surprised how out of all the people, Mafuyu would be the first to understand. Kanade wondered for a bit, how would things be if her parents were around? She didn't think she'd even get a chance at meeting Mafuyu.

"Okay. Thanks a lot!"

"Also Kanade... It's been like 10 minutes. I think our noodles are ready."

"Ah! You're right, shoot!"

Kanade quickly checked their noodles. Sure they were overcooked, but it was food, and they were both extremely hungry. Kanade handed Mafuyu her noodles and chopsticks. Kanade grabbed hers and sat across from Mafuyu. The two girls put their hands together, prayed, and dug in.

"Mmh! Noodles never get old for me. Are they good, Mafuyu?"

"I don't know."

"Ah, I see..."

"I do taste... something though. It's not nothing like usual, but it's not too strong. I definitely know it's there. This has never happened before."

Kanade stopped eating and faced Mafuyu.

"Are you telling me..?"

"I guess. Not sure."

Kanade felt like hugging Mafuyu. She was so happy. She didn't show it too much on her face though. Kanade was proud. She'd actually done something. Something for her. Finally.

"....Thanks for finding me, Kanade."

"....Y-Yeah of course!"

They both continued to eat. It was pretty late now. Mafuyu thought it'd be about 11pm. Kanade didn't even care at this point. She was just happy that Mafuyu was with her. And with that meal, Kanade finally let out a yawn.

"You should get to bed Kanade."

"But you're a guest...it's better if you sleep first. Besides, I need some school work to do..."

"Kanade, we've been through this before. Don't overwork yourself. You need sleep."

"But, Mafuyu-"

"No buts. Go to bed. You're almost finished eating after all, I'll clean up."

"No, you don't need to do that!"

"It's my pleasure. Come on get to bed. I'll be there shortly after."

"Okay fine..."

Kanade lifted herself and sleeply headed to her room. When she made it, she let herself fall onto the bed. Thankfully, the part of the bed she laid on was not full of music. Kanade was basically half awake now. She couldn't hear much anymore, but one thing she did hear was... something she wished she didn't. Kanade heard Mafuyu say she'd be there shortly after. Kanade didn't want to jump to conclusions, but she had an idea on what she meant by that. I mean, where else would Mafuyu sleep? Kanade didn't want their guest to sleep in the living room! She didn't have a futon either.

"Kanade, you asleep?"

"....almost."

"Just get to bed already."

Mafuyu cleared the rest of the bed full of music and let Kanade lay more comfortably.

"Mafuyu...?"

"Yes?"

"Where are you going to sleep?"

"Hm? I don't know. Probably the living room."

"What? But that would make me seem like a horrible person.."

"Just for making me sleep in the living room?"

"Yeah..."

"Well where else should I sleep? I wouldn't want to make you sleep in the living room. Unless you don't mind sharing the same bed. I don't mind."

Kanade quickly shot up and became a blushing mess. She coughed a bit and scooted over closer to the wall.

"I-I....sure, go ahead."

Kanade caught a small blush coming from Mafuyu. A very faint one. Mafuyu climbed into her side of bed with her back facing Kanade's.

"You sure you're okay with this?"

"Y-Yup...I want you to be comfortable as well."

"Ha... you'll do anything for anyone Kanade. That's what makes you...you."

"H-Hey...I just want the best for people."

Kanade was still blushing. She wasn't too used to getting comments for Mafuyu. Kanade was still a bit cold. It was supposed to be spring and still it was always in the 40's to 50's. Mafuyu took notice of this.

"Hey, are you cold?"

"A little."

Mafuyu stayed put for a little until she uprised and started to look for her uniform.

"Mafuyu? What are you doing...?"

"Finding my uniform. Oh, here it is."

Mafuyu pulled out her black jacket she always put over her uniform and handed it to Kanade.

"I can't possibly wear your jacket, Mafuyu!"

"But you're cold. Here."

Kanade gingerly grabbed the jacket and rose to her knees to slip it on. It was oversized considering how small Kanade was.

"Hm. Doesn't look too bad on you."

"Think so?"

"Yeah."

Mafuyu climbed back into bed with Kanade and tried to fall asleep. Kanade tried to do the same.

*Tick tock Tick tock*

An hour passed by now. It was 12pm. It was almost time to go on Nightcord. Though, they both didn't seem to care too much. They were both with each other and exhausted. They were both in the same position they were last time, trying to doze off. Mafuyu slept pretty easily. Kanade on the other hand...

"Hah....It's been and hour and I still can't sleep."

"...."

"I don't think I've ever seen Mafuyu sleep so soundly. She must suffer at home. She looks like she hasn't slept so nicely in...months......She's so pretty..."

"Mm...? Did you say something Kanade?"

"N... Nope!!! Just go back to bed! Okay?!"

Kanade quickly turned back and wrapped Mafuyu's jacket around herself while clenching it. Mafuyu tried to turn her head back, but she didn't feel like it.

"Okay...goodnight."

"Yup. Night!"

Kanade quickly responded and held her hands to her face. 'I'm so stupid!', she thought. She couldn't think of anything else but that. Her thinking was overfilling her head so much to the point where she just couldn't stay stable.

"...I should sleep now."

Kanade shut her eyes and tried to sleep. She wasn't used to sleeping with someone right next to her. Not until her mom passed. Kanade used to come into her mom's bed all the time after a bad dream, or just for fun. She misses those days. Kanade fell asleep as soon as she closed her eyes shut. She was very tired after all. She couldn't imagine what else to do.
*4am*

"....Ngh. Is it morning...?"

"Oh Kanade, you're awake."

"What time is it?"

"It's 4am. You should get back to sleep."

"Then why are you awake?"

"Couldn't sleep. You still seem tired."

"...I kind of want to stay up with you. Is that okay? We've done it so many times before anyways."

Kanade turned and faced Mafuyu while Mafuyu did the same. Kanade let out a small laugh towards her own joke. Mafuyu still had a blank expression but the light in her eyes twinkled a little brighter.

"So, what should we do?"

"Uh...I didn't actually think that far."

"You always do that."

The clock ticked more and more throughout the silence between the two. They both just kind of...looked at eachother. Kanade looking at Mafuyu's eyes and Mafuyu looking at...something else.

"Mafuyu?"

"Huh?"

"You're spacing out."

"Oh. My bad. I was thinking about something."

"About what?"

"U-Uhm..."

Kanade noticed Mafuyu blushing pretty intensely. Definitely not as much as Kanade, but it was still a blush. Mafuyu tried to make an excuse quickly, but all she thought of was...

"Kanade. I've been seeing and hearing a lot of people say something about someone they really like. They call it a crush."

Kanade jolted and tensed up. Was Mafuyu actually going to tell Kanade something like that? But Mafuyu barely felt anything at all. How could that be possible?"

"Uh huh..."

"Have you ever had someone like that?"

Kanade stopped for a bit and sighed. She was pretty relieved.

"No...not really."

You see, Kanade didn't actually say the truth. Kanade was blushing really hard. At this point she'd need a blush counter. Kanade actually...had a big crush on Mafuyu. She was in denial, for long time. She didn't want to accept her feelings because of Mafuyu's feelings. She knew Mafuyu wouldn't feel the same. Heck, Mafuyu can't even feel anything. Not much anyway.

"Hm.."

"Why'd you ask?"

"...I thought maybe if I had someone like that, I could feel something more. A lot of people describe it as if their world lights up when they have someone like that. Would that help me as well..?"

"I...I don't know. We'll have to find out when you do."

"Yeah..."

"It sounds like you really want someone like that."

"....But I don't want to put your work to waste."

"I wouldn't mind. As long as you find yourself again, I'll be happy."

"Really...?"

"...Mhm!"

The corners of Mafuyu's lips curles up a bit. She felt a strong bang in her. Her face grew hot and her heartbeat heavy. Kanade also felt as if her body felt different. They both felt a bit awkward. The quietness was way too weird for both of them. So, Mafuyu broke it.

"...Kanade?"

"What's wrong?"

"Are you sure you answered honestly when I asked you that question earlier?"

Uh oh. The jig was up for Kanade. And she was so scared. She didn't know what she could say, especially to Mafuyu! And Mafuyu could read anyone like a book. So, she did what she needed to. She didn't know how this would affect the relationship from now on, but she did it anyway.

"...No."

"I knew it. What's the truth then?"

"I actually do have someone I care for like that. I was, and still am, too scared because I don't know how this will change her. Or me. I don't even know if I can say it."

"Who is it...?"

Kanade hesitated for a few minutes. She did not feel like blurting out her confession at 4am on a random Friday night. Still, there was nothing she could do.

"....You."

Kanade covered her face and almost felt like crying again. She didn't even want a response.

"It's...me?"

"Mhm...I can go if-"

"No it's fine. I think...well I feel like, I've been feeling the same. I can't really describe it though."

"What...?"

"Like I said, when I listen to your music, I feel warm. When I'm around you entirely, I feel hot. I feel....nice."

"Y-You're joking..."

"I don't think so."

"....I-I don't know what to say."

"Kanade please don't cry again...."

"I won't I won't!"

The incomplete girls were looking at eachother, now aware of their feelings. Kanade didn't want to face Mafuyu, while Mafuyu only wanting to face her.

"I want to try something."

"Eh? Like what?"

Mafuyu grabbed Kanade's hand and rested it on her cheeck while holding it there. Cupping one side of Mafuyu's face.

"Something like this."

"...!"

Kanade was taken by surprise by Mafuyu. She didn't actually think Mafuyu would do something like that. She wanted to jump up and scream, but she just stayed there. For Mafuyu.

"H-How do you feel..."

"Not sure...but I feel warmer than usual. I feel comfortable. Loved. Mostly...free."

Kanade gasped a bit. She didn't expect Mafuyu to actually give an answer. She was still surprised, but extremely happy. Kanade didn't know anything about love, intimate love to be exact. She didn't know what else to do since one of her hands weren't free. Mafuyu's eyes were closed, trying to rest probably. Kanade always noticed people doing something when they were in this situation.

"I hope you don't mind if I do this Mafuyu."

"Go ahead."

Kanade leaned in with her hand still being held by Mafuyu's on her face. She gently perked her lips and gave a small, but sweet, kiss on Mafuyu's forehead. She didn't know what she was doing, so she just did it small and fast. Kanade was blushing very hard. So was Mafuyu.

"K-Kanade!"

"I'm sorry... that's what I thought of first thing. I didn't know how to do it so I just-"

"Can you try something else for me Kanade?"

"Hm..?"

"Could you...give me another one?"

Kanade's eyes widened and her jaw dropped ever so slightly. Her eyes were just barely open, being very tired of course. It was very obvious Kanade was half awake but Mafuyu didn't say anything.

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

Kanade leaned in once more. This time, she went for a different spot. She compressed her lips onto Mafuyu's. Kanade felt Mafuyu jump a bit. Still, Mafuyu accepted the kiss and leaned even closer to Kanade, overpowering her. The kiss lasted a little longer than Kanade was hoping for. Their bodies were also practically right on one another. After they both broke away from the kiss, Kanade instantly started gasping for air. She did not like not having air.

"I...Can't...Believe...I just...Did that..!"

"Me...neither."

The both of them were both blushing pretty hard while holding eachother close. After that, they stayed quiet....again. We might need another counter for how many times these two stay quiet. They didn't know the status of their relationship yet, but they knew they were more than friends.

"Kanade..."

"What do you need?"

"I think that kiss just now...made me feel more than I ever have. I-I...I don't think I've ever felt so loved. I think you've made a part of me come back. Kanade.......thank you!"

"Mafuyu....it's my pleasure. Anything for you."

The time passed by with Kanade now having her head under Mafuyu's, digging her face into her chest. She had her knees together and curled up a bit closer to her waist. Mafuyu had her hands now on Kanade's head and one on Kanade's back. They were both still cold. So, I guess you could call it two birds with one stone.

"Kanade, I love you."

"....Me too, Mafuyu."

The two drowned in sleep again. It didn't take them too long for them to see soft dreams again. Both girls weren't good with their health...that still needs work. Mafuyu hasn't found herself just yet, and Kanade still needs to take care of herself. At least the two of them can do it together.

*Next morning*

"Okay Kanade, I'll be going now."

"Yeah. Bye!"

It was early morning when Kanade and Mafuyu were standing out of the house. Kanade in the doorway and Mafuyu outside in the front of her.

"...Wait a second, Mafuyu..."

"Huh? What's wrong?"

Kanade held Mafuyu's wrist and pulled her into a hug. A very tight hug. Just like the very first one they had last evening.

"Please...be careful. Be safe."

Mafuyu accepted the hug and cupped Kanade's face in her hands, landing a kiss on her lips.

"I promise I'll be okay."

"Mhm. Goodbye."

They broke away and they both waved goodbye. It almost felt like they'd never see each other again. They were both upset that they'd have to wait forever to see their faces, but they have to bare it. The sky lit up and Mafuyu's alarm went off. Which meant another day started for her. This time, she'll be more satisfied with her days from now on. Her and Kanade both. Mafuyu didn't care about her mom at that moment. She just thought about her night with Kanade the entire way home. The entire way to where the place she hates most. Thankfully, Kanade took things off her mind. Mafuyu was finally content with something. After so long...

Kanade helped find one of Mafuyu's missing pieces.