Chapter Text
"Good lord, what is that smell?"
Dan sucked in a breath of panic and rushed to tap out the joint on a coaster. Herbert had just barely stepped foot into the living room before Dan was able to hide the joint under the couch.
"Ah, Dan, I didn't know you were home this early." Herbert had just taken off his shoes and coat before entering the living room, just barely missing Dan hiding the joint.
"I didn't know you were either."
Herbert squinted his eyes and sniffed the air a couple times. Dan could feel a couple beads of sweat form on the back of his neck.
"Dan, did you get sprayed by a skunk on the way home? Get up, would you? I don't want you getting any residue on the couch." Herbert turned on his heels and started walking towards the bathroom. Likely to get something to clean with. Dan scrambled to stand up. He didn't want to lie, he'd just get found out anyway as soon as Herbert got close to the couch.
"Wait! Wait Herb, uh. You don't have to do that. Sorry, I didn't think you were gonna be home for a few more hours. I wasn't able to get rid of the smell like usual." He looked into Herbert's eyes with a guilt ridden expression.
"Smell of what, Dan? And what do you mean by 'like usual'?" Herbert narrowed his eyes, returning Dan's gaze. Dan felt like an ant under a magnifying glass, and by God was Herbert the sun.
"It's..it's weed, Herbert. I was smoking weed." He said, wringing his hands.
"Weed." Herbert echoed.
"Weed. Y'know. Marijuana." Dan said, feeling more awkward with every word. He was basically admitting to a federal crime, just one more thing for Herbert to hold over his head.
"Oh...I didn't know that's what it smelled like. I always thought we had skunks under our porch, only I could never find the accursed things anywhere."
"I wouldn't help you reanimate a skunk, Herb." Dan said, shaking his head.
Herbert folded his arms. He scrunched up his face, probably imagining the possibilities of how that would go.
"I probably wouldn't use one as a subject anyway. That's beside the point. Why are you smoking an illegal substance in our home, Daniel? Partaking in mind altering drugs is highly unbecoming of a doctor in training." He unfolded an arm to gesture vaguely at Dan. He had some sort of smirk on his face that Dan wanted to wipe right off.
Dan leaned forward to tower over Herbert and furrowed his brow. "Oh please, like this would be the worst charge brought against us if we were arrested. Lay off, Herbert. It helps me fuckin relax, that's all. Between dealing with your experiments, and med school, not to mention the long hours in the ER, I think I could use a break once in a while dontcha think? Or do you think I should never have a calm moment ever, in my own home?" He gestured around him to signify that this was, in fact, his house. Herbert groaned in frustration.
"Yes, I believe you should have a clear mind as often as possible, Dan. What if I need your help in the basement, or you randomly get called in to work? Do you think you'd be able to focus enough to do your job? Unbelievable. I'll be in the lab whenever you come to your senses."
And with that Herbert left. Dan growled.
"Alright, fine. Be that way. I'm not leaving for a good while, so get comfy down there." He returned to the couch, bent down, picked up the hidden joint from under the couch and put it between his lips. He took out the lighter from his pocket and lit the joint, cupping around the flame out of habit. Herbert stopped in his tracks as soon as he heard the flick of the lighter. He turned around to see Dan sit down, reach his arm over the back of the couch, and set up his leg in an exaggerated figure four. Getting himself comfortable. He inhaled a big puff and took away the joint from his lips, letting smoke out from his lips in a steady blow. Like a chimney.
Herbert watched every wisp leave Dan's mouth. By the time Dan put the joint back up to his lips, Herbert had made his way over to his side.
"Give me that."
The joint dropped a little bit as Dan's face shifted in surprise, but he kept it from falling out by holding it with his teeth.
"Wait, why?" He muttered, raising an eyebrow. Was Herbert planning to destroy it in front of him?
"Just give it to me." Herbert held out his hand, expectantly.
Dan took the joint and, hesitantly, handed it to Herbert.
Herbert pinched it between his thumb and forefinger, bringing it up close to his face to study it. Then he took the tip to his lips and sucked in harder than necessary.
His eyes teared up a little and squinted, then he coughed out the cloud from his lungs. He continued hacking for a solid minute, to the point Dan almost expected to see his lung hit the floor. Eventually it subsided. He took a few breaths to regain control of his lungs, then he started to chuckle.
"It's just like that time I tried to smoke cigarettes as a child. I was so...foolish."
Dan's eyes widened. "You tried cigarettes?" Herbert shook his head.
"I never should have tried. The other children at the foster home would sneak around and smoke. I just wanted to know what the big deal was, what was so significant about it that made them climb out the window at night. Let's just say it was not worth the month-long grounding."
He still held the joint between his fingers, staring at the smoke rising from the tip. It was slowly extinguishing itself. Dan watched it too.
"I'm glad you don't smoke, Herb. The smell makes me nauseous."
Herbert didn't respond. He merely hummed in acknowledgement. Yes, it's best that he didn't. Plus he'd seen what it does to the teeth and lungs, and he didn't need his own body deteriorating on him any more than it was.
Herbert sat down on the couch next to Dan, passing the joint back to him.
It was at this moment Dan realized he now knew something new about Herbert. Foster home? So his roommate was an orphan? That's one thing they had in common, at least. For whatever reason he wanted more. More insight into this man, a peek into his reality, his humanity. Call it a morbid curiosity.
"I'd like to know more about you, West."
Herbert, ignoring the tingling feeling in his fingertips, rested his hands on his knees. He turned his face to Dan. "Why?" It came out of his mouth sounding more like a statement than an inquiry.
"It's just, you live in my home. We've known each other for months. We've gone through so much together. And I don't even know your favourite colour, or food, or anything really. It's like you're a stranger sometimes."
Herbert raised his brow. Sometimes as a child he'd needed to participate in class activities where you introduce yourself alongside a random fact about yourself. He'd often just make something up on the spot. He never knew why he'd lie all the time. Maybe he didn't think these nobodies deserved to know him at all. Maybe he was just more boring than he'd like to believe.
Colour? Food? What was next, his social security number? If all Dan wanted to ask was these inane questions, he could indulge. After all, he'd earned far more for his eager participation in their research, but this small favour should suffice for now.
"Fine. One question will be answered every time you hand me that." He pointed to the joint. Dan looked down at it, startled. Like he almost forgot he'd been holding it. He picked up the lighter.
"Deal."
And so they sin together once more.
Herbert accepted the joint back into his hand and put it to his lips. Dan reached out his hand and lit it for Herbert, like he had done before for a few girls he'd talked to. He wouldn't mind the cigarette smell as long as they only stayed one night.
Herbert, now knowing what to expect, took in the smoke at a much slower pace. And a lot less, too. He held it in his mouth before letting go, watching it exit his lips and escape into the air above them.
He looked over at Dan, expectantly. Dan was ready with his first question.
"What kind of music do you like? I never hear you play any."
Herbert sighed. "Music can be…distracting. Any noise, really. I don't like to listen to anything when I'm working. I don't want anything to take my mind off the task at hand."
"You never listen to any music? At all? You never sing? Or dance?"
"I don't dance, Dan. And that was way more than one question, but I'll let it slide."
"Damn."
The first question was definitely a waste. And Herbert likely wouldn't last many more. He'd need to plan the next questions carefully, like he was handling a genie, or a monkey's paw. He just couldn't think of any meaningful ones by this point.
Herbert was feeling the tingling sensation travel up his arms and legs. His head felt like a balloon. It felt nice, almost. Like he was wrapped in a blanket. He smiled and, for once, didn't feel the need to conceal it.
Dan took the joint and pulled a nice long drag. He was definitely more experienced. He could probably finish this thing all by himself, but he hadn't had a smoking buddy since high-school. He hadn't realized just how much he missed the company.
It was once again Herbert's turn. The smoke still burned his throat a little, but he wasn't willing to admit that to Dan.
"Alright. It's high time I know. Pun unintended." He looked Herbert in the eyes with a serious look on his face, the most serious one he could muster. He paused briefly for dramatic effect.
"What is your favourite colour?"
Herbert honest to god giggled at that. He must be at least a little inebriated by this point.
"My favourite colour? You really wish to know?"
Dan nodded, emphatically. Yes, yes he really wanted to know. Everyone had a colour they liked the most. His was green, and he'd known this since he was a little boy.
Herbert gestured for Dan to come in closer, almost conspiratorially. Dan obeyed. Herbert got right up to Dan's ear and whispered. "Grey. My favourite colour is grey."
Daniel slumped back. Of course it would be the most boring colour there was. He couldn't exactly mask the dissatisfied look on his face. Herbert watched him, trying to come up with proper words. He stumbled a bit but finally rushed some words out. "Like an early morning fog, or tea with milk, or a brain in formaldehyde. It's a delicate colour."
Dan winced at the last example, but he figured he could see it, the beauty in a delicate thing. Herbert couldn't stop the last thought from tumbling from his lips. "And it was the colour of my mother's eyes. Grey, with some blue mixed in. I got my father's eyes, unfortunately."
Dan stared at Herbert. The other man's eyes were nearly closed. He was definitely feeling it by now.
"Okay, I think that's all I can take for now. I'm sorry." Herbert mumbled. His eyes finally finished closing, his head slumped back against the couch. Dan should've known he'd fall asleep, this particular strain had that effect. He shook Herbert's arm, snapping him awake. Herbert let out a small grunt but let Dan lead him off the couch and to his room, stumbling just a little.
Herbert patted Dan's arm as he reached his bedroom door and gave him a small sleepy smile. Dan just stood there, stunned into silence.
"This was nice, Daniel. Maybe we can do it again." And with that Herbert closed the door behind him softly, leaving Daniel alone in the hallway.
Dan walked back over to the couch. The rest of the joint had his name on it. He needed to get much higher than he already was, anything to ignore the aching feeling in his stomach. To ignore the effect Herbert's little smile had on him. He took another hit and held it.
What was wrong with him?