Chapter Text
"⸺Like the scattered petals,
the dancers in the sweet wind in spring,
such ending suits them both
Farewell to this boisterous world
They keep holding hands for
the reunion which never comes again …"
The male sang, dragging the last note with power flawlessly as the track faded out, signalling the final recording of the song to finally be completed. Bachira Meguru huffed a breath as he readjusted the headphone around his head. He moved to hear the track once again to ensure that it was perfect this time when his phone rang from the side of his desk.
"Hey, mom!" Meguru piped after answering the call, sliding down the headphone in the process to cling around the back of his neck.
" Hmm , how's Meguru doing?" There were some sounds of shifting as though she was settling down, probably on the couch of their house.
"Great, as always!" Meguru hummed back, a smile playing on his face. Well, his days weren't that great, but still, it would be nice to assure his mother like always. "I just finished recording a new song. You'll see it in a few days. Maybe tomorrow."
"I'm looking forward to it then." Meguru heard a friendly chuckle follow after. "Ah, do you remember about the thing we agreed on before?"
Meguru pursed his lips into a thin line. "About the roommate thing? Yeah." Now properly taking off his headphones from his neck, Meguru spun in his chair. That was quick, he remembered putting up the advertisement just three days ago. His mother kept insisting for him to take a roommate in so that he would make a friend of his own.
"Isagi can't be your only friend."
"Mom, there's Chigiri and Kunigami too."
"I'm talking about friends that you make on your own, Meguru."
"Somebody contacted me yesterday. He would like to move in as soon as he could." There were sounds of papers rustling, his mother hummed for a short while. "His name's Itoshi Rin. He went to your college too. Do you know him?"
…Itoshi Rin?
Meguru froze in his spot for a second. That guy? He wanted to live here with Meguru? Did he even know that he would live with this Bachira Meguru?
"Yeah, I know him." The boy mumbled into the line.
Meguru had heard of him. Although not much. Everyone in the college would've known of Itoshi Rin, the little brother of The Itoshi Sae who was currently leading an extraordinary life in the world of business. Itoshi Rin was a prodigy like his brother, and the male was currently the college's top student in the business major.
Meguru couldn't imagine rooming with a person like that. Nonetheless, it would've been better for it to be someone that he knew rather than some random strangers on the street.
A realisation dawned upon Meguru the next second.
"But, mom. What about⸺"
"Great! Then it's settled. I have to go buy groceries now. Love you, honey. Bye!"
"...Love you too. Bye, mom."
The call ended.
What shall he do now?
🦉🐝
Bachira Meguru, who majored in music and was also known as 'Honey-kun' online was a well-known utaite who debuted a few years before college.
Meguru was about 10 years old when he dived into the world of music. He had a potential for art just like his mother but after going home, and passing a vintage-looking store with old instruments in it, he knew that he would like to get into the world of music the moment the store lady allowed him to play around with the instruments.
His interest then deepened the moment he knew that he could sing just as good as those singers in the old radio his mother placed in their kitchen.
Bachira Yuu saw how much music meant to her son and she couldn't be any happier.
Growing up, Meguru wasn't the best at making friends. He was lovely just the way he was but perhaps others couldn't see them the way Yuu did. The boy had been lonely since his childhood days, only having Yuu to accompany him every time. Her painting as Meguru hummed a tune or simply played the guitar she had gotten him on his birthday the very same year he fell in love with music.
Meguru was still growing up as a lovely boy but he had developed a tendency of being conscious of his appearance. Often, he hid behind a mask after finding the comfort of being protected without having to worry about how he seemed in others' eyes. Yuu couldn't recall how it started, but she didn't force him to let go even after he had become better at accepting himself.
Meguru's 'Honey-kun' identity started when he was one year into high school. He was still as passionate about music just as he was during junior high school, if not even more. Meguru started an utaite channel under the simple name and posted many covers along with some tracks of his own. He improved a lot now, somebody could give him an instrument and give him a few days ⸺or even hours⸺ and he could at least play the simplest song if required.
'Honey-kun' was a pretty bad and simple name but Meguru couldn't help it. He spent almost an hour thinking and just went with it knowing that most utaite did have unique names too. He just took whatever that he could probably connect with his own name. Meguru still couldn't comprehend that somehow one of his top viewed videos was the ' Renai Circulation ' cover though.
Nonetheless, Bachira Meguru currently was facing one of the biggest crises he hadn't had in years.
Itoshi Rin would be moving in. But what about Meguru's Honey-kun activity?
'He can't find out.' Meguru thought as he sat on his bed, gazing over his desk where the recording equipment was lined with several instruments against the wall. Ranging from acoustic guitar, electric guitar to keyboard.
Meguru knew that Rin would most likely not be the type of person that would run off his mouth if he somehow knew Meguru's identity of being Honey-kun. Rin might not even know who Honey-kun was but still Meguru would like to lay low in front of the boy.
'It'll be fine.' Meguru assured himself. He just needed to hide it well.
And deep down he couldn't help but think that if Itoshi Rin was just as cold and indifferent as everyone said, it would be easier for Meguru; If Rin was already a cold person, it wouldn't be as hurt if he were to call Meguru weird later on too.
'It's fine. You're fine!'
"You are not weird, Meguru."
🦉🐝
Meguru had just finished uploading his latest song when he heard the doorbell coming from the entrance of his apartment. He scrambled his way out of the room, slapping a face mask on as he adjusted his oversized navy shirt and white shorts. He was so engrossed in uploading the new song that he forgot to dress up properly before welcoming his new roommate.
It had just been two days and Rin was quick to move into Meguru's apartment. The older boy spent hours yesterday tidying up the apartment, moving various things from Rin's room which used to serve as Meguru's studio to record his anonymous singing video. The curtains did a really amazing job as a background and the video always came out great with his silhouette which only ranged from below his chin to the top of his torso. Perhaps he could start commissioning artists with his income soon or spend more time drawing on his own.
"Wait a sec!" Meguru hollered, opening the front door in seconds. His eyes turned wide, almost flinching as he had to angle his head up slightly to meet the gaze of the figure in front of him.
"Welcome!"
Meguru gulped slightly. To be honest, he had never witnessed Itoshi Rin this up close. Only seeing him from a very long distance, being a person that majored in something totally opposite to him and all.
But oh, lord. This man was beautiful, breathtaking even.
Teal eyes stood out from under Rin's dark locks, gaze so stoic yet Meguru couldn't look away as he stared into those bright-coloured marbles. He had a bigger build than Meguru despite being a year younger than him, body almost towering over the older one as they stood at the entrance of the apartment.
'Come on, it's not the time to be drooling over your new roommate!' Meguru shut his eyes for a short moment, slapping both of his cheeks mentally.
"Ah, let me carry those for you!" Meguru flashed a bright smile, eyes closed although the boy couldn't see them properly because of his mask.
"No need, I don't bring that much stuff with me. Just show me my room," Rin adjusted his grip on his luggage and duffel bag.
"Alright, let's go, Rin-chan!" Meguru chirped, leading the way enthusiastically.
"What did you just call me?" Rin frowned, gritting his teeth slightly.
"Now, now. Don't be such a stranger, we're roommates now after all," Meguru shrugged, probably pouting behind his mask but Rin couldn't imagine it to confirm the assumption.
Rin only huffed, "Stop calling me that."
"Nope!" Meguru playfully replied. The boy then turned the doorknob of one of the rooms located down the small hallway, on the right side.
"This is your room⸺" Meguru gestured to the room he just opened. "⸺and that is my room." He pointed to another door just a few steps across from Rin. "That is the bathroom, the only one." A door at the end of the hallway.
Rin only nodded once.
"Great! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm just going to be in my room for a while. See ya later, Rin-chan!" Meguru grinned, skipping to his room before shutting the door.
Before he slowly collapsed to the floor.
'That was pretty okay.' Meguru assured himself, taking off his mask to breathe properly. 'He seemed okay with me. It's fine.' Nervously he rubbed the middle of his chest with his trembling hand. Damn, he didn't even know it was shaking. Recalling the indifferent gaze, he could only think out loud to himself, "I've had worse."
'Gosh, can I really make friends on my own like this? ' Meguru groaned.
His roommate was kinda pretty though, so Meguru might be able to do this.
🦉🐝
Bachira Meguru, Rin had heard of him from others. The pretty odd one from the music department. He always wore a mask around the college ground despite being a so-called sunshine, nobody had really seen his face.
There was also a well-known fact among those that liked to talk about Meguru of how he always submitted his assignment before everyone, giving others no chance to listen to his piece at all. Rin found this as an anomaly because Meguru was a music student; Meguru was pursuing music but why would he wish for others to not listen to what he made?
Rin frowned, pushing the thoughts away. Just why he was wondering so much anyways. Moreover that senior was kinda getting on his nerves, instantly calling him with nicknames and all that.
Rin was only living here because of his big brother after all. That guy wanted to come back to Japan for the next few weeks and no way in hell would Rin want to stay within a 10-meter radius with that guy. Yes, Rin was that petty that he would rather live somewhere else instead of breathing the same air as Itoshi Sae. And this apartment was closer to the college.
" Hmm , you're cooking dinner?" Meguru walked into the living room, his eyes widened as he looked at Rin who was preparing dinner in their open kitchen. " Wahh , I didn't know Rin-chan could cook." He teased.
"It's not like I'm going to let you do all the chores. Again, stop with the name," Rin almost rolled his eyes but he decided to turn back to the stove instead.
Rin could see Meguru coming closer from the end of his sight, preparing plates to serve their simple dinner consisting of miso soup and rice along with some heated side dish that Rin found in the fridge.
Once they were done placing the dishes on the table, Meguru settled himself on the chair across from Rin. He pursed his lips into a thin line, gazing down at the meals in hunger yet he found his hands frozen in their place on his lap. He realised that he might need ⸺well, have to⸺ take off his mask if he didn't want to die of starvation tonight.
When Meguru looked up he saw Rin staring back into his yellow eyes.
"Ah, umm… " Meguru laughed awkwardly, looking everywhere around the apartment except for those teal eyes. "Let's eat shall we?" His hands couldn't help but tremble slightly as they made their way to his ears. Rin wouldn't notice for sure, right?
'This is why you need to actually go out more, touch some grass and socialise properly .' Meguru mocked himself.
When the mask came off it was still silent, Meguru dragged his gaze up only to see Rin had already started eating.
'Wow, this guy.' Nevertheless, Meguru couldn't help but feel relieved. He almost chuckled at Rin's indifference.
'He didn't say anything…' Meguru's eyes sparkled in awe. His hands now moved to finally start feasting their dinner.
Meguru knew that his appearance was okay. His mother and only friend, Yoichi, told him multiple times that there was nothing wrong with how he looked. However, once Meguru started wearing a face mask during his last year of junior high school when he had gotten a small cold, he just couldn't stop. He found so much comfort in doing so. He could smile as much as he wanted, not smile as much as he wished and he wouldn't need to care about people finding out what he was thinking.
It was a comfort to Meguru, like wrapping up oneself in a thick blanket during the winter season. He had put his problems in the past but it would still be hard for him to simply show his face. It was the words that lingered in the back of his mind that made his hands shake every time he attempted to take his face mask off in front of people that weren't his mother or his only friend.
Meguru's mother assured him that it was fine but he knew that his mother was just as sad as himself to see him like this.
"...You don't look that bad." Rin suddenly spoke up in the middle of their eating session, taking notice of the absence of focus in Meguru's eyes as the boy was slowly chewing his food. "Why the hell are you hiding your face anyway?..." He grumbled slightly. That was kinda insensitive of him but it just slipped off his tongue.
Meguru, surprisingly, started laughing for a moment. "My, what a compliment. Thank you, Rin-chan!" He grinned and this time Rin could see it well.
Yellow eyes hid behind closed eyelids. A wide smile plastered on Meguru's face, showing his rows of teeth. The apple of his cheeks settled just below his eyes as they shifted closer.
"Whatever, Bob Cut." Rin huffed. He realised by now that it would be no use to tell the boy to stop calling him by that name. He continued eating his dinner not knowing that there was a pair of eyes still settled onto his figure.
"Hey!"
Meguru felt a bit giddy as he noticed that Rin didn't snap at him just now, although Rin did give him an ugly nickname in return. Somehow, Meguru wasn't offended by it. He only sheepishly munched the food in his mouth as he fiddled with the chopstick in his hand.
"And can't you please stop smiling all the time, it feels weird!"
The grip on the chopsticks tightened for a moment. Meguru stole another glance at Rin before continuing to eat in silence.
'It's fine. He doesn't think you look weird.'
Maybe, just maybe, Meguru could say that he was confident that Rin and him could be friends.
🦉🐝
Meguru stared at the desserts presented before him through the transparent glass of dessert display lined along the counter. He was in a cafe located just a few streets from the college, down the same route he would always use on his way home.
"Hmm, this and this please." Meguru pointed to the dessert he wanted to the worker behind the glass shelves.
"A cup of iced black coffee." A familiar voice came from Meguru's left side.
"Oh, Rin-chan!" Meguru greeted, seeing his roommate standing by the counter to order a drink. "We finally met on our way home!" He added.
It had almost been a week since Rin came to live with Meguru. Their schedule was a bit different from each others' but they would still see each other at home in the evening. Rin sometimes would be out for soccer practice ⸺being one of the college's athletes⸺ and Meguru would have a couple of hours in his hands to do what he wanted. Singing, recording, playing instruments or just blasting his own songs in his room.
It wasn't easy and Meguru almost panicked when that one evening, Rin came back a bit early and Meguru was in the kitchen, headphones on, to get a glass of water. He thanked the lord that he was currently sipping the liquid down instead of singing his heart out as he did before.
When Rin spotted Meguru calling out to him, he looked somewhere else as if to not acknowledge his existence. He walked away and sat down in one of the seats in the cafe before Meguru paid for his desserts and welcomed himself in the seat across from the younger male.
"Come on, don't ignore me like that. I'm going to be hurt, you know," Meguru pouted slightly behind his mask.
Rin sighed as though he was giving in, "What do you want?" He asked through gritted teeth.
" Tadaa ! I got both of us desserts," Meguru showed the little boxes inside the plastic bags he was holding. "Which one would you like? Honey or matcha? I love honey but I'll give it to you if you don't want it," He hummed, pushing the bags closer for his roommate to see.
"I don't eat sweets."
"You're no fun, Rin-chan! Honey it is then," Meguru insisted, hugging the plastic bags closer to his body then.
"Just go home, Bob Cut," Rin stared at the boy in front of him, eyes half-lidded to show that he had no interest in what the boy wanted to do.
"No way!" Meguru scrunched his nose playfully. "We should go home together, no? We live together after all. We can be good friends, don't you think?" He convinced, eyebrows raising to urge the boy to agree to his suggestion.
"No," Rin stood up from his seat, going to the counter when his name was called to take his order away.
Meguru, not giving up, trailed behind the boy and followed him out through the entrance of the cafe. He skipped his steps beside the male, hurrying as he couldn't keep up with Rin's fast steps.
"Slow down, Rin-chan," Meguru exclaimed, making his way to walk beside the younger male once again.
"No," Rin replied yet Meguru noticed that his steps did slow down a bit. Just a bit.
The two of them walked in solace with only the sound of the surroundings accompanying them along with random remarks from Meguru. Whether there was a puppy on the street or about the new shops around the area.
"Ah, let's go there!" Meguru suddenly gasped in the middle of their walk.
Rin was about to decline, wanting to go back as soon as possible when he found himself being dragged along with the masked boy.
"Come on," Meguru excitedly gripped Rin's wrist, tugging him into a store just a few steps away from where they last stood.
Rin hissed in return, "Stop touching me." He made the gesture to yank his hand back. However, Meguru managed to let go and pull on the sleeve of his black-coloured hoodie instead.
The younger then discovered himself standing in front of shelves filled with countless DVDs. They were in a disc rental store and Meguru was enthusiastically picking out a movie beside Rin.
" Hmm , what do you want to watch? What genre do you like?" Meguru asked, crouching on the floor to check the lower sections of the DVDs.
"Horror," Rin failed to not answer the boy. He clicked his tongue at himself. "Why? I'm not watching a movie with you."
" Boo , don't be a party pooper, Rin-chan." Rin could guess that Meguru was sticking his tongue towards him, eyes closed. "A movie night is a must. We are friends after all!"
"I'm not your friend," Rin remarked.
"Well, I am," Meguru proceeded to not care about what Rin had stated. "I'm going with this one then." He stood up after choosing a DVD and was about to make his way to the counter.
"Stop," Rin pulled on Meguru's backpack. The older one almost stumbled a bit. "Give me that."
Rin ended up picking the movie for them.
🦉🐝
Meguru hummed a tune as he strummed the strings of the electric guitar in his hands, connected to the recording equipment. He was in the process of finishing an assignment from his music professor to make a song based on the theme 'universe' . It was actually a small contest; she insisted it to be a small assignment too so everyone would have to take part in it.
Meguru loved music but he wasn't ready yet to show his music to the people at his college. He guessed maybe a part of him was still afraid of people's judgement. However, his professor respected his privacy and situation, knowing just a part of it from his first year at the college.
It had been about three days since Meguru and Rin watched the horror movie together. It was quite fun, to be honest. Meguru wasn't that good at handling horror but he managed to watch the movie until the end. Rin barely flinched, meanwhile, Meguru would jump from his seat from time to time. The couch was small, a three-seater, but the two of them settled themselves at the ends of the couch with a bowl of chips between them.
Rin told Meguru that he didn't eat sweets yet he finished the honey-flavoured cake that Meguru bought for him.
It made Meguru feel delighted. Rin might seem annoyed with him sometimes but Meguru couldn't help but feel confident that he could push a bit more further every time and somehow it would always work; he would always manage to catch a glimpse inside Itoshi Rin's personal space bubble.
Meguru didn't know exactly when, but during the time the movie was playing, he took the action to completely remove his face mask from his face and not only pull it away if he wanted to eat the chips. It just felt so comfortable and the living room was dark, only illuminated by the graphic coming from the television. Meguru knew he could let his guard down and perhaps be 'ugly' all he wanted and Rin still wouldn't give a fuck about it.
The movie night was worth it, although Meguru did scream his lungs out when he discovered Rin standing near him in the middle of the night when Meguru was trying to get a glass of water for himself.
Meguru chuckled at the memory.
The ring of his phone snapped Meguru out of his thoughts.
" Yo , Isagi!" Meguru greeted upon taking the call, reading out his friend's name word by word.
"Hey, you free now?" Yoichi asked through the line. There was a brief sound of a door shutting.
"Yup, I just finished a background track of my assignment. Why?" Meguru glanced over his PC, saving the audio before transferring it into a flash drive.
"I was thinking of grabbing some fast food with you. To catch up. Do you want to?"
"Yeah!" Meguru replied enthusiastically. It had been a while since he last hung out with Yoichi. The boy was in a different college after all, one that was on the other side of the town.
"So you know where to meet?" Meguru could imagine Yoichi smirking behind the line.
"Of course!"
Meguru laughed, knowing well where the boy was indicating. He hung up the call, plucking the flash drive off the port before sliding the flash drive into his pencil case so that he could easily find it later.
🦉🐝
The backstory of how this particular fast food restaurant became their usual hangout spot was quite funny actually. It was back in their high school years, the place where Meguru first became friends with Isagi Yoichi although they were in the same class as first years for almost two months.
That one evening, Meguru had ordered his usual choice of meal and decided to sit at the farthest corner of the restaurant. He was eating facing the wall, away from everyone's view and was munching on a hamburger happily with his face mask hanging on one of his ears to block the side of his face from anyone.
Yoichi suddenly came to greet Meguru, wishing to sit with him as he noticed his classmate. Meguru was surprised that he started choking on his hamburger. Both boys instantly panicked and Yoichi, not knowing what to do, just shoved the straw of his newly bought Coke into Meguru's mouth. Meguru only coughed harder because of the carbonated drinks but still managed to survive.
It was chaotic and they somehow did eat together after that. Yoichi kept apologising even though Meguru laughed it off. He had also forgotten about his mask during that time.
Yoichi ended up stuck with Meguru, being his only friend, throughout high school. There was Chigiri and Kunigami too, but as people said, ' your friend is other people's friend too '. Meguru's situation was kinda like that. He did talk with them several times but to truly be friends? The goal was still far away, it seemed.
Yoichi surprisingly didn't push Meguru away, he didn't bother to and it relieved the boy to know that he was maybe somewhat tolerable. Sometimes, Meguru thought that it was just maybe because he didn't show his 'weird' side but he did know that he acted the way he always had. High school was quite better than junior high school, probably because of how there were fewer immature kids around and more people that just wouldn't butt in people's business.
"Isagi!" Meguru greeted as he sat in front of Yoichi. They were once again in their usual seats like back in their high school days.
"Oh, Bachira!" Yoichi smiled, putting away his phone when he realised his friend had arrived.
The two settled on their orders, ordering their favourite meals along with some new menu. Once they had gotten their meals, they made their way back to the table with a tray in each of their hands.
"So, what's up?"
"The roof!" Meguru exclaimed, gesturing to the ceiling excitedly before he slowly took off his face mask. His hands then moved to unwrap the hamburger he ordered.
There would always be no need for Meguru to worry about his face here, not when he had slowly overcome it in this place for years and the one eating with him was the same companion throughout the period. The restaurant had also developed through the years, now adding waist-height walls to serve as cubicles for the tables.
" Haha , I'm talking about that roommate of yours. You mentioned that someone moved in, right?" Yoichi was close to grimacing at the boy before him. He snickered before glaring playfully at Meguru.
"Yeah," Meguru nodded, talking while waving his bitten hamburger around. "My mom really wanted me to socialise more."
"Are you alright though?" Yoichi asked with a frown between his eyebrows, concerned as he stopped eating for a moment.
Meguru nodded again, not hesitating to do so. "At first, I was worried but I kinda pushed my way through. He isn't that bad, for me." He took another bite of his hamburger and sighed. "But he might just simply not care at all. He said my face isn't that bad, it made me kinda happy."
"You immediately show him your face?" Yoichi's eyes softened in awe. He knew that it must've been pretty hard for Meguru to do that.
"Yeah, we were having dinner so I had to. I wanted to eat too," Meguru added, easing the boy. "And ooh , have I told you that he's a looker? He's taller than me and is one of the college's top students. He's an athlete too!" he winced.
"Oh, damn ."
"Yeah, and he's kinda indifferent all the time but I simply won't give up like that. I had us watch a horror movie together days after he moved in and it was pretty good. We walked back together that evening too and I got him a cake even though he disliked sweets," Meguru continued to briefly tell his friend about his life recently during their eating session.
Yoichi was still a bit worried if Meguru was being treated unkindly but there was a look on his friend's face that was more to being fond of this roommate. He only nodded as he listened to what Meguru was saying.
"I do think we'll get along just fine!"
"Yeah, I'm rooting for you," Yoichi chuckled.
"And oh, I'm also hiding my utaite activity from him because I don't want him to find out. He usually goes home later than me because he's got soccer practice." Meguru dug in the dessert next, not aware of his stunned friend at the moment.
"...Bachira… What's your roommate's name?"
" Hmm ? Itoshi Rin, why?"
The rest of the few minutes was somehow filled with Yoichi's story of a soccer match that he had against Rin's team a few months ago. To sum it up, Yoichi got his ass beaten in the match and he was determined to take the younger one down the next time they met in a match.
"But I'm not saying that you shouldn't be friends with him," Yoichi shook his head. "Who you wish to be friends with is your choice. I told you I'm rooting for you after all and I'm definitely going to beat him next time! Just know that if he ever hurts you, I'm not going to wait for any matches soon and I'm going to straight up pull a direct shot to his face," he hissed after.
" Geez , alright, Isagi!" Meguru uncontrollably laughed, covering his mouth as he was still swallowing the strawberry-flavoured sundae ice cream. "I'm not sure he'll let that happen though pfft⸺ "
"Hey! Be confident in my abilities, will you?" Yoichi sulked slightly.
Meguru hummed teasingly, pushing Yoichi's own melting chocolate-flavoured sundae as though to coax the boy. "Yes, yes. A direct shot to his face indeed."
Rin wouldn't hurt Meguru, probably; He wouldn't be able to hurt Meguru if what he was doing was harmless in Meguru's view.
After all, Meguru had had it worse.