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Ten year old Juleka Couffaine sat at her best friend’s bedside in the hospital.
Rose was sleeping after her treatment. Juleka didn’t really understand what was wrong with Rose, the adults just said that Rose was very sick, and she had to go to the hospital a lot, and get hooked up to lots of scary looking machines, and that Juleka had to wash her hands really hard with special soap and wear special clean clothes when she visited during her treatments.
But she didn’t mind, because it was Rose.
She liked being around the eight year old, she made her feel less alone, less invisible, even more so than her Mom and Luka did.
Her ability to be invisible had been helpful here at least. At first she kept being ushered out early because of something called visiting hours, and Rose would get really upset, but then Juleka’s Mom and Rose’s parents had had a word with the Doctors and Nurses, and they said that as Juleka was so quiet she could stay while Rose was having her treatments and recovering afterwards as her presence calmed Rose down.
Especially as none of Rose’s other friends came anymore.
Juleka thought they were dumb, the hospital room was pretty, and this was Rose. There were pictures of unicorns and kittens all over the place, and they always made her friend feel better.
She was listening to some music quietly on headphones when Rose stirred. Juleka looked over her friend. She was so pretty, even in a hospital gown.
She missed Rose’s golden hair, something about the treatments had made it go away, but the bright pink headscarf with kittens she was wearing now looked very pretty, very Rose.
“Juleka…?” Juleka yanked her headphones out, barely able to hear Rose’s croaky, rasping voice.
“I’m here Rose.” Juleka said quietly, conscious of the other kids in the room, all similarly as exhausted. Rose’s parents said the treatments were supposed to make Rose feel better, but Juleka thought they made her sicker. The adults just said that was normal and they’d make Rose feel better in the long run.
“Juleka? Juleka! Where are you?”
“Rose, I’m here!” But her voice still came out as barely a mumble. Speaking up did not come naturally to Juleka, but for Rose she would try. She felt the familiar self-doubt creeping at the edge of her thoughts like storm clouds, telling her to be quiet, to be invisible.
But she thought of Rose, and it was like there was a warm golden light encasing her innermost core, banishing the storm clouds.
Rose grew tense, her face contorting into a frightened expression as she called for Juleka again, and the machine that went beep started getting more rapid. Juleka could see the same storm clouds in her friend’s expression.
“Juleka? Juleka, where are you? Juleka!”
It was then that Juleka realised Rose was still asleep, but having a bad dream. Her friend thrashed her arms weakly in panic. The beeping was becoming more urgent.
She decided she would be Rose’s light.
“Rose, it’s ok, shh, I’m here!” Juleka pressed the call button. The nurses had said it was not a toy, but to press it if Rose was too poorly to press it herself, then Juleka grabbed Rose’s hand and stroked it soothingly.
“It’s ok, it’s ok Rose. I’m here.”
Juleka wasn’t sure if Rose could hear her talking, so she kept stroking her best friend’s hand, never letting go, so that she would know that she was there.
“Juleka…” Rose sighed happily with a slight smile on her face.
It seemed to be working. Rose feebly squeezed Juleka’s hand and turned her head to her, eyes still closed but seemingly having woken from her dream. “There you are, my Jule…” She had started to calm down as Nurses came into the room. The beeping slowed to a more normal rhythm.
“Where else would I be?” Juleka replied, quietly.
One of the nurses gave Juleka a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder and whispered “Good job”. She resisted the temptation to shrink away from the touch, Rose needed her, so she just gave a shy smile in reply.
Juleka barely paid any attention as the Nurses did their usual checks and asked Rose questions, giving her a few sips of water when Rose said her throat was dry.
Through it all, Juleka never let go of Rose’s hand, looking up at her friend’s face, looking into eyes which were just now barely cracked open. Rose smiled at Juleka.
“Sorry for scaring you Juleka.”
Even now, when by all rights all thought and concern should be on her, Rose was worried about others, about Juleka.
She couldn’t help but smile back.
“It’s alright Rose.”
And Juleka realised it was true. As long as Rose was in her life, everything was going to be alright.
And in that moment, looking beyond the surface of Rose at her lowest ebb, seeing the blazingly bright and loving soul underneath, Juleka realised a truth as evident as the sunrise:
Rose was the most beautiful girl in the world, and she never wanted to not be a part of her life.