Chapter Text
Miyamoto Usagi had no idea how he got here.
One moment he was riding the streets of Neo Edo in his motorbike. Just one last produce delivery to make in the city for his auntie before he could go back home to the farm, and the next-
Well-
“AAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!”
He was screaming. Or at least trying to scream. The air howling in his ears drowned out everything else. His raw vocal chords threatened to burst as he free-fell, blinded by blue plasma.
He slammed into something rough and solid. Catching himself on his hands and knees before he could faceplant, he made an attempt to open his eyes.
Bad move.
He cracked open an eye and immediately, his rabbit ears began to ring and his vision blurred. Caught off guard, Usagi fell down forwards onto his elbows, ringing getting louder as his body threatened to give out.
Everything was so bright and so loud.
He squeezed his eyes shut as hard as he could which seemed to stop the ringing. His vision also focused back, but the peace didn’t last long.
He picked himself up, unsteady and disoriented for a moment before regaining his balance.
-HOOOOONK-
“What the hell?! GET OFF THE ROAD YOU MORON!!”
Usagi whipped around just in time to see a large machine swerving at him, blaring its horn as its driver shouted more obscenities at him. The road was jam packed with cars. All of which were honking at him, trying their best not to hit the rabbit standing in the middle of the four lane street.
Loud.
Everything was so loud.
Suddenly, something hit Usagi straight in the ribs. Not hard enough to fracture, but definitely hard enough to leave a nasty bruise. If he was at full attention, Usagi would’ve sensed the car entire seconds before it made impact. But with all the strange bright lights, unfamiliar sounds, and not to mention the smog-clouded air, Usagi was not operating at full capacity.
Fully disoriented again, he unsheathed his katana and blindly jammed its hilt towards the thing that attacked him. The pommel hit the headlight, shattering the plastic and taking out the light so it was no longer glaring in his eye.
Which was good.
However, it also set off the car alarm.
Which was not as good.
Usagi stumbled backwards at the new noise, trying to cover his ears.
An exhaust pipe next to him released a noxious puff of foul smelling gasses, causing him to cough and cover his face with the bandanna he kept tied around his neck.
He swung blindly again and again at everything surrounding him as he blinked the smoke from his eyes, just trying to escape whatever the damn hell was happening . But all his efforts only served to make the situation worse.
Damaged cars and screaming people only caused more chaos. People in nearby buildings even opened their windows to see what the commotion was.
Through the smoke for just a moment, Usagi could’ve sworn he saw a blur of green sitting on the rooftop of one of the buildings.
He blinked rapidly to clear his vison, but it disappeared. He didn’t have time to dwell on it though.
Finally getting his bearring back, Usagi put a hand on the hood of one of the cars he hit with his katana and leapt over the dented metal with ease. He landed with a soft pat on the other side, just like how he was trained before sprinting off into a dark alley between two buildings to catch his breath.
He sheathed his katana, leaning against a graffiti covered wall. He ripped off his bandana and heaved in gulps of air as the chaos continued to rage on slightly farther away.
Usagi took in his surroundings. A leaky storm pipe was creating a puddle on the gray concrete not too far from his feet. The dumpster to his right was overflowing with black plastic bags. He leaned back, feeling the back of his head touch the damp brick as he looked up into the sky.
The thick haze of smog blocked out the stars that Usagi was so used to seeing from his aunt’s farm back in Neo Edo.
This was not Neo Edo… Wherever this was.
He needed to get back home.
Without any sort of warning, the solid brick wall next to him opened up with a vwoom sort of sound, creating an orange portal.
Usagi startled and jumped away, remembering the portal with strange light that brought him to this awful place.
“OUT! You wretched. Ungrateful. Spineless. INVERTEBRATE!!”
A huge lobster was violently shoved out of the portal and Usagi could only stand and watch with his eyes practically bugging out of his head.
Was that lobster wearing… a suit?
The lobster person (uh, lobster man? creature?… thing? ) stumbled forwards from the force before dramatically whipping his head back, rolling his eyes with an exaggerated scoff.
“Ugh, whatever. ”
“LEAVE. Don’t you ever DARE show your face here ever again! I Hire you and you steal from my register? Huh? Is that how you repay kindness?!! ”
Following the lobster was a man made of nothing but bone. Literally. A dark gray skeleton was nearly assaulting the back shell of the lobster in an attempt to kick him out faster.
And he was furious.
Still processing everything, Usagi stood stiff like a board, unable to move.
As the lobster stalked off out of sight, the bone man suddenly whirled around to point at Usagi. The look of absolute rage was enough to make Usagi -a trained and honorable samurai- instantly put his hands up like he was being arrested.
“You. Yokai. Need a job?”
Coming to his senses, Usagi bagan inching away backwards. Back to the street-
“Did you see where that kid went?”
He stopped moving backwards to listen for a moment.
“The furry that smashed my fuckin hood? No. But lemme tell ya, when I get my hands on him-“
“Did anyone see that little ninja mother fucker-“
“My fucking CAR bruh-“
Ooookay, he was not going to go back that way.
He was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Figuratively. Literally , he was stuck between a crazy skeleton and an angry mob.
The skeleton nodded at him, prompting Usagi to answer.
He darted his eyes to the traffic wreckage and growing angry crowd one more time before looking back at the skeleton.
“Uhhhhh…”