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"This whole life you said
Is like a dream that you don't wanna forget
Hold my heart, hold my head
You know I've been your baby since the day that we met
It's alright, alright."
"If ever there's a summer when we just can't be together
There'll be half of me where light's not gettin' in
I'll see that photo I took of you with the blossom tree above you
And I'll just be glad I loved you like I did."
-Dermot Kennedy, "Blossom."
“You meeting up with Ice this weekend?”
Merlin’s voice caught Maverick’s attention, half asleep sitting across from his RIO at a back table in an air carrier classroom. He glanced up, his chin resting atop his hand, his elbow on the table, he pulled his eyes off a set of numbers that had become meaningless half an hour ago, logs he’d verified were correct but was still staring at, busywork as the squadron was grounded from weather.
“That’s the plan.” He breathed, dropping his pen and shifting back. He reached his arms out in front of him, stretching out with a quiet yawn. He and Merlin had been on deployment for only a few weeks, and they were already scheduled to be stateside soon, but Maverick was still longing to be home.
“Does he have other plans?”
Merlin watched him work to shake the last of his tiredness off himself, nudging Maverick’s coffee mug a little closer to him with a small, teasing smile.
“Maybe it’s a good thing we were grounded today.” The RIO remarked, just as Maverick let out a jaw-cracking yawn.
“Shut up.” He grumbled, but he sent Merlin a smile when he took a large drink from his coffee mug. “He doesn’t have other plans, but we’ve seen each other three times in the past four months, and one of those times was at the airport, so I’m not counting on things going smoothly.”
That didn’t mean he wasn’t hoping, though. The summer had been almost perfect so far. It was the beginning of August and Maverick had spent the past few months teaching an exhilarating batch of students at Top Gun and spending all the time he could with Bradley and the rest of their family. They’d all come back from deployments at the start of the summer, all able to get back to Miramar just as school wrapped up for the year. It left them all grounded in the same place, and Maverick suddenly found his free time filled with family. Bradley and Carole, but also Merlin, Slider, and their wives and kids. They spent Saturdays on the beach with five kids running around, they went to museums, and traveled, Slider had even organized a trip to Disneyland for the group of them. It was the family Maverick had always wanted, the one he’d made for himself after Goose died, as perfect as it would ever get, with one missing piece. Tom.
Tom’s determination to climb the ranks had led him east, to the Pentagon. He’d spent the summer jumping across the country on various temporary assignments, a few weeks at the Pentagon, a few weeks somewhere else, a weekend back in Miramar before he was gone again. Whatever he was working on was above Maverick’s clearance. Still, he could tell it was gratifying for him, their phone calls enough for Tom to tell him about the progress he was making, how he felt like he was making change, finding good people and embedding himself in the network he would need moving forward. Maverick was happy for him, glad he was seeing the progress he wanted and that he felt good about it, rather than the ass-kissing that usually came with trying to promote. Still, he missed him, his boyfriend, his partner, Tom.
“Do you have anything fun planned?”
Maverick shrugged, reaching down to pick up his coffee mug again. He lifted it to his lips, using the moment to sweep his eyes over the mostly empty classroom and the aviators scattered around them.
“We’re going camping.” He took a sip of his coffee. “Hopefully. We haven’t quite settled on a place, but we were thinking about Big Sur.”
“It’s beautiful up there.” Merlin told him, picking up his own mug of coffee. “Julia and I spent a weekend up there for our anniversary last year. I bet she could give you some restaurant recommendations, if you want to incorporate that in with your camping.”
“What, did you not eat or something?” Maverick grinned when his RIO shrugged, almost sheepish.
“I’m just not good at remembering that kind of stuff. I could find my way back to them in person but I couldn’t give you the names if my life depended on it.”
Maverick felt himself huff a laugh, and he nudged his RIO with his elbow. “Thanks, Merlin. I’ll be sure to ask her before we go.” He fought back another yawn, then drained his coffee mug while his RIO watched in amusement. “What about you, any big plans?”
“The kids go back to school pretty soon. I thought I’d take some leave and maybe the four of us will go somewhere, maybe do a couple day trips. Julia wants to take the girls whale watching.”
“Is this the right season for it? I thought that was more of a fall thing.”
“You would know.” Merlin remarked, sending him a grin when Maverick rolled his eyes. When they’d first started flying together, he’d surprised all of them with a few whale facts on a hop, ones he remembered from a book Goose had read to him after he’d accidentally brought it on a deployment, intending to leave it home for Bradley. Merlin and Slider had joked he was something of a whale expert ever since, not that he had the knowledge to back up the claim.
“I’ll look into it.” Merlin continued, then tilted his head. “Or maybe we’ll take a page from your book. The girls might like camping, I don’t think we’ve taken them before. Do you and Ice camp much?”
“Not really, no. I guess he and Slider went on a few trips while they were in college. This started out as another trip for them, but then Ron’s parents couldn’t come to help out with the baby and he didn’t want to make Christie have to watch the kids all by herself, so now I’m in.” He lowered his voice, far enough away from any other aviators that he wasn’t too worried about being overheard, even if he couldn’t quite brush aside all caution. “We wanted to get away. The middle of nowhere sounds pretty nice right about now.”
Merlin gave him a sympathetic smile. “I’m sure. It feels like it’s been forever since you two were in one spot together.”
“Tell me about it.” Maverick grumbled.
It felt like he hadn’t seen Tom in months. Carrier phone calls never felt private enough to really talk, and letters could only say so much. They managed a few phone calls when Pete was at home and Tom was off in a hotel somewhere, but trying anything sexy over the phone only seemed to hit the spot once or twice before it just reminded Pete of what he couldn’t have. The last time he’d seen Tom had been in the Miramar airport, with Tom leaving and Pete just getting home. He’d wanted to drag him home with him, his trip be damned, but he hadn’t. He hadn’t even kissed him, he couldn’t. They’d hugged, had a beer at the airport bar, then gone their separate ways. Four weeks later, he wanted Tom and no distractions, no one to hide from and no one to interrupt them.
“The weekend will come soon enough.” Merlin promised, nudging his arm. “You’ll keep busy until we head home, then you’ll have a little time to rest and you’ll be back with Tom again.”
Maverick groaned, pressing his face into his hands. “That’s like four whole days from now.”
“And it’s been a month since you saw him in the airport, and nearly a month and a half since you saw him before that.” Merlin pointed out. “You got through all of that just fine, I think you can manage four more days.”
Maverick folded his arms atop the table, resting his chin on top of them. He glared at his RIO for a long moment. “You know, I really hate it when you’re right sometimes.”
Merlin shot him a winning grin. “That’s what I’m here for.”
“Hello?”
Pete had hardly dropped his bag inside the door before he called Tom. Carole and Bradley had come to pick him up from the airport, and Slider was hosting their whole family for a welcome home barbecue in his backyard that night, but there was one more person Pete had to talk to.
“Tom.” He felt a smile on his lips just at the sound of his partner’s voice, and he felt it bleed into his voice.
“Pete.” Tom breathed, his voice immediately warm and fond as he recognized Pete’s voice through the phone. “Hey, did you make it home alright?”
“Yeah. Carole and Bradley just dropped me off. We’re all planning on meeting back up tonight at Slider’s for dinner.”
“That sounds like fun.”
“It would be more fun if you were there.” Maverick mumbled, shifting the phone against his ear and dropping himself down to sit on their bed. They kept the phone on Tom’s side of the bed, because he was the one who received more calls, and with every increase in rank it seemed those calls had become more frequent. He ran his fingers over Tom’s pillow, wondering if it might still smell like him.
“I’ll be home before you know it.” Tom promised him, his voice warm and sweet despite Pete’s grouchiness.
“And then you’ll leave again.”
“Baby.” Tom chided gently, and the fondness in his tone, in the term was enough to melt some of the bitterness locking up Pete’s core, reminding him that he was loved with one word. “I don’t have anything planned after this trip. I’m even scheduled to teach the next session, they’re not going to pull me away from that.”
“I feel like I haven’t seen you all summer.”
It wasn’t his place to bitch and whine about Tom being gone. He’d encouraged Tom to go after what he wanted, he’d encouraged him to climb the ranks because he believed in him, because it was something he knew Tom could do, and because he wanted to see Tom in those places. He trusted Tom in a position of power more than he trusted most of the naval officers he’d ever met. He truly believed that Tom could bring about some change to the system, leave it at least slightly better than he found it. It wasn’t fair for him to complain and gripe to his partner the minute things got tough.
He let out his breath quietly before Tom could speak. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be bugging you like this.”
“Pete,” it was like Tom couldn’t temper the fondness in his tone if he tried, not that Pete suspected he was trying. “It’s okay to be frustrated. I know we weren’t expecting things to turn out like this. I didn’t think I’d be gone for this long, either.”
“I wish…” Pete sighed, tugging on the phone cord and laying back on the bed, reaching back to rub a hand through his hair. “Sometimes I just see Merlin and Slider and I wish we could have it like they do, where they get to fly home to their families and they don’t have to pretend like we do.”
“Should I start going to the spouse support groups when you deploy?” Tom asked him, and Pete huffed a quiet laugh.
“I was actually thinking the other way around. You’re over here being Mr. Fancypants, maybe I could come with you, iron your shirts in the morning, hang off your arm at parties.”
“You want to be my trophy wife?”
“I could be a great trophy wife.”
Tom laughed, relaxed and open. “Well, you’ve certainly got the hot part down. I’m not sure I’d trust you to host a party, though, or cook any meals.”
“Once you hit Rear Admiral, we’ll just hire a staff.” Pete told him, and Tom laughed again, though he quieted quickly.
“You’re right, though, Pete.” He murmured, “It’s hard to see them with all that while we have to hide everything. If someone else asks me about my wife or my kids again,” he trailed off in a frustrated huff.
“I know. I can only talk about Bradley for so long before people start prying for details.”
Tom sighed, and Pete could hear rustling through the phone. He imagined Tom sprawled out on his back on his hotel bed, the phone connecting them as if they were only inches away, rather than thousands of miles.
“Just two more days.” Tom breathed, like he was trying to remind himself as well as Pete. “I’m all yours, Pete. Just two more days and we’ll be together again.”
“In the middle of nowhere with no one to interrupt us.”
“Exactly.” Tom hummed, and Pete sighed, turning over onto his side.
“I miss you.” He murmured. He pulled Tom’s pillow closer to him, pressing his nose into the pillowcase and breathing deep. At least his time spent away from the house had made him a little bit more attuned to the scents within, Tom’s pillow holding just a hint of his lingering smell.
“I miss you, too, Pete.” Tom told him, and Pete closed his eyes, pressing his face into the pillow. “Listen, I have to meet some of the guys here for dinner, so I’m going to have to let you go. I’ll see you at the airport on Friday?”
“No.” Pete grumbled, lifting his face out of the pillow so Tom might actually hear him through the phone. “Slider’s picking you up. He said he wanted a minute with you before I ‘climb you like a tree.’” He recalled, rolling onto his back again.
Tom’s laugh was soft in his ear. “Alright. I’ll see you at home, then. Say hi to everyone at dinner for me, okay?”
“Okay.” Pete didn’t want him to hang up, but he and Tom could talk for hours if they had the time, so if Tom was taking his leave Pete knew he must actually be busy. “I love you.”
“I love you, too. See you soon.”
“Uncle Mav!”
As much as Pete missed Tom, getting rushed by a group of children had a way of bringing his spirits up like little else. Merlin’s kids, twins, both seven, led the charge giggling as they ran at him. Regan, Slider’s oldest at three, toddled behind them, with Bradley, eleven years old and suddenly convinced he was an adult, just behind her, his hands out to support her if needed. Pete grinned, setting aside the pack of beers he’d brought to open his arms to the kids. He pulled the twins into his arms, dropping kisses on top of both girls heads, and when they giggled and wormed away from him he picked up Regan, swinging her high into the air and grinning when she shrieked in delight. He settled her against his hip as Bradley reached him, and he used an arm to pull the boy against him, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
“Hey, Brad. You miss me?”
Bradley hummed noncommittally, but he was grinning when he looked up at Pete. He smiled a little brighter when Merlin passed the two of them, picking up the pack of beers Pete had brought and ruffling Bradley’s hair as he went. Bradley half heartedly tried to avoid his hand, pushing his hair back into place once Merlin was gone, but his smile never dimmed.
“Uncle Sli took us to see the airshow while you were gone. The Blue Angels were there! It was so cool!”
Pete grinned at him. “No kidding? You take any pictures?”
Bradley seemed to deflate at the question, a small frown creasing his lips. “I tried. I took dad’s old camera but when we got the film developed it was all blurry.”
“That’s okay, kiddo.” He wrapped an arm around Bradley’s shoulder, leading the two of them back towards the rest of the group. “It’s hard to take pictures of them when they move so fast.”
“I did get a good picture of a helicopter. A…” he frowned, his face scrunching up for a moment as he fought to remember. “CH-46. Mom let me get an extra print for you. You can hang it on your fridge.”
“Thanks, Brad. I’m sure it’ll look great.” Pete pressed another kiss to Bradley’s head even as he protested. “Did you do any other fun things while I was gone?”
He let Regan down from his arms when she started to squirm, the little girl’s eyes on Slider, who crouched down to receive her, his arms out for his daughter. The grill was closed behind him but Maverick could smell the hamburgers cooking within. Merlin was crouched by a cooler, handing a juice box over to one of the twins, his daughter Alex. Carole was holding the youngest of the group, Slider’s and Christie’s daughter Ella, only a few months old now, in her arms, the baby completely asleep despite the noise around her. She was speaking with Christie, while Merlin’s wife Julia had the other twin, Amanda, seated on her lap, coloring in a coloring book atop the table. It was warm and domestic, and Pete couldn’t wait for Tom to come home and round out their family, to have everyone back in the same place again.
“Mom and I have been going over to Aunt Christie and Uncle Slider’s house a lot. They’re fun, but Ella just sleeps all the time and Regan is too little to do much with. I’ve been watching cartoons with her, though, and sometimes mom and I take her to the beach. I helped her build a big sandcastle a few days ago.” Bradley told him.
“That’s nice of you to play with her. Aunt Christie and Uncle Ron probably still need a lot of help with a new baby in the house.”
“I know, Mav.”
“And Uncle Ron’s probably busy with that new project at work—”
“We’re doing just fine, Pete. Bradley’s been a huge help.” Ron interrupted, lifting Regan onto his hip and approaching Pete and Bradley. He pulled Pete into a tight hug with his free arm, drawing Pete against his side. “It’s good to have you back. And in one piece, too. No crazy stunts this time?”
“I have my moments.” Pete said leaning into his friend and hugging him back. Ron grinned at him.
“Well, Merlin hasn’t gone gray yet, so that’s a good sign.”
“I think I’d be more worried if he mellowed out.” Maverick’s RIO called over to them. “I had to talk him out of buzzing the tower three times.”
His words earned a laugh from Slider, and Pete couldn’t help his grin. He nodded to Ron. “Thanks for hosting this.”
“Sure,” Ron shrugged, “you know me, I always love to have the family around.” He drew back from Pete, looking around the assembled group. “I just wish Tom were here.”
“Don’t get him started.” Sam cut in before Pete could respond, approaching them with three beers in his hands. “There’s one more Capri Sun in the cooler, Bradley. You might want to grab it before Amanda finds it. I know you don’t really like the apple juice.”
Pete couldn’t help his smile at how quickly Bradley scrambled away from them, racing towards the cooler with a shout that could only be considered a war cry, only to be quickly shushed by Carole as she hastily covered baby Ella’s ears.
“I have not been complaining that much.” Maverick protested, even as he accepted the beer from Merlin.
“Please.” Merlin rolled his eyes, handing off the other beer to Ron. “Day and night, Tom’s at the Pentagon, Tom’s in Virginia, I can’t even call Tom because he’d be asleep right now. I haven’t gotten a letter from Tom in three days and six hours, Tom hasn’t called me the love of his life in forty-seven minutes.”
“Give him a break, sweetie.” Julia cut in, setting a hand on his shoulder as she followed Amanda to where the food was laid out on a folding table opposite the grill, the little girl already serving herself a heaping bowl of watermelon. “I’m sure you’d miss me if I were deployed all the time.”
Maverick rolled his eyes at the way Merlin immediately caved to his wife, promising he’d miss her very much and pressing a kiss to her lips. Slider gave his shoulder a sympathetic pat, and Maverick waited until Julia had returned to Amanda before speaking.
“Aren’t you supposed to be supportive? I thought you were my RIO.”
“Exactly, not your marriage counselor.” Merlin shot back, and Slider threw his head back with a laugh.
“He doesn’t need a marriage counselor, he needs his camping trip.” He said, waggling his brows in innuendo, implying far more than he could say around the kids.
Maverick took a long swig of his beer.
“No wonder he wants to get away if you two treat him like this.” Christie chimed in from the table. “Leave the poor man alone. And you’d better not burn those hamburgers, Ron.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Ron grinned, giving her a two fingered salute and heading for the grill. From the table, Carole reached out a hand towards Pete and he met her behind her chair, leaning down to press a kiss to her cheek and looking over her shoulder at Ella, still asleep against her. He ran a finger carefully over the baby’s tiny hand.
“Don’t worry, Pete.” Carole told him, smiling up at him. “Just two more days.”
Pete let out a heavy sigh, dropping into the seat beside Carole. “A whole forty-eight hours.” He mumbled.
Carole smiled at him, leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek. “I know what will cheer you up.” She shifted to the edge of her seat, and in a few moments Pete was leaning back in his chair with baby Ella asleep on his chest, both Carole and Christie smiling at him as he pressed a soft kiss to the baby’s head. Carole brushed her fingers through his hair, smiling fondly at him. “There you go, Pete. I’m sure she’ll give you plenty of love until Tom gets back.”
Pete huffed a quiet laugh, but Ella captured his attention entirely when she shifted on his chest, snuggling a little closer as her fingers curled into a fist in the fabric of his shirt, her cheek resting on his chest as she settled back into sleep. Christie and Carole both laughed at his starstruck expression, but it was more than worth it to him to hold the little girl in his arms. With his family all around him, he realized Carole was right, as much as he ached for Tom to come home, his family would be there to hold him close and love him for as long as he needed.
Pete was practically bursting with impatience by the time Friday arrived. He’d spent the past two days with Slider and Merlin and their families. He had taken the rest of the week and part of the next off, so there was nothing to interrupt him from spending his time with his family. He took Alex, Amanda, and Bradley to the beach, played with little Regan and babysat little Ella when Ron had to work and Christie desperately needed sleep. Keeping busy helped, and being absolutely covered in family and heaped in love made the ache hurt a little less, but he was still filled with anticipation by Friday morning. He had the car packed before Tom’s flight had even landed in San Diego, and he spent an entire hour before Tom arrived pacing the living room, trying and failing to be patient. He was beaming the moment the car rolled up in the driveway, and Tom had barely set foot in the house before Pete was on him, his hands in his shirt as he kissed him the way he’d wanted to do for months.
“O-kay.” Ron announced, depositing Tom’s suitcase in the entryway. “I guess that’s my cue then.”
Pete felt Tom smile against his lips, then he was drawing back, gently pulling Pete’s hands from his shirt.
“No, no, no, no,” Pete practically whined, trying to hold on even as Tom gently pulled his hands away. “You just got here, wait.”
“I missed you, too.” Tom promised, smiling at Pete. There was so much fondness in his eyes that it knocked some of the fight out of him, and Tom laughed when Pete stuck out his lip in a pout. “Give me two minutes. Then I’m yours. I promise.”
He gave Pete a peck on the lips, drawing back when Pete tried to deepen the kiss. He turned to face Ron, watching them with his arms crossed over his chest, a hint of amusement lurking below feigned irritation.
“Can’t even wait for me to leave before you start trying to climb him like a tree.” Ron mumbled, but Tom just pulled him in for a hug, ignoring his words with a roll of his eyes.
“It’s good to see you, too, Ron.” He told his RIO, “thanks for picking me up.” He drew back, his hands on Ron’s arms. “I’ll see you soon? Ella better not have forgotten about her favorite uncle.”
“You’ve got some work to do on that front.” Ron told him with a grin. “She might like Pete more than she likes me pretty soon.”
“Why am I not surprised by that?” Tom smiled back at Pete and Pete grinned at him for a moment before he looked back at Ron.
“Hey, Sli?” He asked, and Ron pointed his index fingers at him.
“You got it Mav, I’m outta here.” He stepped back towards the door and Pete watched Tom roll his eyes, but his partner pulled him against his side anyways. “See you both at Merlin’s on Tuesday?”
“We’ll be there.” Tom promised, “Say hi to Ella for me.”
“That won’t make her love you more than she loves Mav.” Ron pointed out, and Tom rolled his eyes, giving Ron’s shoulder a light shove.
“Alright, get out, Ron.”
Ron grinned, waggling his eyebrows at them. “Have fun on your trip.”
“Oh, we will.” Pete promised, and he was backing Tom up against the door as soon as he’d shut it behind Ron.
Pete kissed him hard, one hand holding Tom’s cheek and the other finding his waist. They kissed until he was nearly out of breath, Tom grinned at him when they pulled apart.
“Hi.” Tom murmured, and Pete bit his lip to contain his smile, though his lips turned up anyways.
“Hi.” He murmured back. He dropped another kiss to Tom’s lips. “You ready to go?”
“Right down to business then?” Tom’s hands came down to hold his hips and Pete shrugged.
“I’m pretty sure that if we stay here any longer we won’t make it on that camping trip.”
Tom’s laugh sent warmth flooding through his body and Pete practically collapsed into him, leaning his head into Tom’s shoulder and wrapping his arms around him.
“God, I missed you.” He whispered. Tom’s hand came up to hold the back of his head, and he pressed a kiss to Pete’s temple.
“I missed you, too.” He pressed a kiss to Pete’s neck, then started to work his way up, kissing along his throat until he found his way to Pete’s jaw, finally stopping behind his ear. “Okay, I think I see what you mean.” He whispered, and Pete couldn’t help the little laugh that rushed out of him. Tom pressed a quick peck to his lips, then gently guided him back. “Let me take a quick shower, then we’ll go, deal?”
“On second thought, maybe I could join you in that—”
“No.” Tom shut him down quickly. “You said it yourself, we’ll never leave.” He reminded, and Pete stuck his lip out in a pout. “I’ll shower. You make us some sandwiches, and then we’ll go. Deal?”
Despite his pout, Tom was still smiling softly at him, and Pete found he couldn’t hold on to even a pout in front of Tom, a smile splitting his lips despite all his efforts to stop it. Just being with Tom, having him in front of him, being able to touch him, to hold him with the promise of so much more felt like there was light finally reaching the half of Pete’s body that had been shrouded in shadows for as long as Tom had been away. It was like being filled up with warmth when he was cold, being held when he needed it most.
“I love you.”
Tom let out a mock huff of frustration, shaking his shoulders lightly. “Pete, focus.” Pete felt himself grinning, and Tom laughed, pulling him close again like he couldn’t resist, pressing his lips to Pete even as the two of them were smiling too much to properly kiss. Tom’s smile was warm and fond when they broke apart, holding Pete’s face in his hands. “We’re never leaving, are we?”
He couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of him, drunk on Tom, his very presence, all his plans suddenly flying out the window in the best way possible. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
To his credit, it was Tom who dragged him into their bedroom. By the time they finally made it on the road, it was two hours later than they’d planned, but Pete didn’t mind it one bit. He and Tom spent the entire drive side by side, even if it was dark by the time they finally reached their campsite, and putting up the tent was a pain in the dark, they fell asleep in each other's arms, and Pete had never been happier.