Chapter Text
01.
Mutsuki remembers getting drunk once.
The memory is present on his mind because it brings back a sense of nostalgia. Nostalgia he doesn’t do, because it means clinging to things in his pasts and as far as he knows, the only thing worth remembering from his past are his parents. Anything else is sour and dark.
But, he does remember the taste of alcohol, the burn of his throat as he downed a shot (shots? He thinks there was more than one). He remembers cheering, a clap on his back and then the world swirling around and shouts of his name, hands, and finally blackness. When he woke up, he only did because he ended up almost choking on his vomit.
He suffered through his first hangover alone and feeling like dying. ( Let it be said that he never again drank anything without checking its contents or what it is he's drinking.
It’s only nostalgia, because there are other feelings attached to it that are alike to the ones he’s feeling right now. It’s nostalgia because he misses the way alcohol clouded his thoughts and he no longer had to think about the stares. Or the use of wrong pronouns, or how he’s wearing a dress right now.
He doesn’t come up with any useless excuses to himself ( because it’s so hard to talk to the others about this, they wouldn’t understand, never will ) when he takes the drink he’s being offered. He downs it and then goes to take another one, two turn to six, and there’s a nice feeling.
Mutsuki’s not ashamed to admit that maybe he took advantage of any male in the perimeter that offered him drinks; a part of him just didn’t care that they didn't see him as what he really is, ( and a part of him, small and almost soundless, whispers male not female, male ). So he smiled, batted his eyelashes, and ignored the twisting of his stomach. That would be easily resolved with more drinking.
He’s not content until he finally stops caring about the looks and the smile on his face is more genuine, more aloof.
He likes this, he likes it a lot. All he thinks about is just the pretty lights, the people around him but not with him ( looking at him ).
He spots, someone off at the corner and his feet carry him there. There’s a smile on his face when he greets them and he doesn’t know ( remember ) what he said, but there’s an invitation to somewhere he deems important and there’s a three-second span before he spots a patch of white ( blonde? ) hair and he’s waving.
Then he’s running, almost stumbling, and reports to Sassan about the invitation. There’s a warm feeling on his chest when he receives praise, so he doesn’t get to see the confused looks on his teammates faces.
It’s so funny, they’re all wearing dresses. He doesn’t remember why, but it’s a funny picture. So of course, he drags Shirazu and Saiko to dance and then when the room’s spinning too much and he’s lost his footing he’s…
He’s looking up at Shirazu, and he gives him a crooked smile. ‘So pretty, ah, ‘mma sleep now.’
When he shuts his eyes, he’s out in an instant.
- - -
The moment he opens his eyes, he immediately regrets it. There's a difficult choice to pick when it comes to either a) the sun's too bright and shining too much ( and it should definitely tone it down a bit ) and b) there's an oncoming headache that's bound to be worse.
So he turns around until his back is facing the window, and the light coming from the window dapples across the room, Mutsuki concentrates on one spot before he feels his eyes slip shut.
- - -
His mouth feels like sand, his throat feels like it's cracking. His head is killing him and the room's somewhat spinning. All in all, Mutsuki feels like death has taken claim of his body. He might be overreacting though, but it still is an unpleasant feeling. He has a vague feeling that maybe the RC cells have something to do with the fact that this hangover might not be as bad as it's supposed to be.
He really doesn't care as long as he's not throwing up. ( On the bright side, it's the first time he's gotten drunk and not perished on his sleep by vomit. As far as he knows, there's better ways to go. Vomit-induced death? Well, if whatever entity that's watching over him decides that his death will be caused by vomit, then so be it. )
It takes him ten minutes to stand up, about two to place his feet on the cold floor and thirty seconds after before he's looking around, spots a glass of water ( or he hopes it is ) on the nightstand next to his bed and then he's downing it like it's the last glass of water on earth.
It's not enough, but it'll do. He's not going out to the living room reeking of alcohol and sweat. The dress he wore last night was sticking to his skin uncomfortably, and he's somewhat glad that no one had bothered to undress him while he was most likely unconscious.
( He comes to this conclusion because in all honesty? He doesn't remember anything past the dancing, and he's pretty sure he was not in the right state of mind to lead himself to his room, let alone get a glass of water for the morning. )
Mutsuki isn't going to lie, he finds it tempting to just lie down and not do anything for the rest of the day. He has a vague feeling that maybe Sassan will let him have this day off, but still...
It doesn't feel right, the team does so much and he feels more like a burden than an actual teammate. So he sucks it up, looks for his eyepatch, takes the filthy dress off and wraps himself around his towel before heading towards the bathroom.
He can deal with social interaction, even if his step is more slow and his reflexes feel sluggish( er than usual ) and besides, it's best to start his day good and not lying on bed just because he was irresponsible enough to drink carelessly.
The only good side to everything is that he doesn't remember last night's event. They're a blur, and it's better than knowing what he knows actually happened, happened being that he may or may have not been actually pleased with the use of 'lady, and she's and her' because it meant more alcohol.
( In his bathroom, in his room, he feels so much safer because the only eyes that stare at him are only his own. )
- - -
When he walks out of his room, he's not really hungry and it's somewhere around noon, lunch. Sassan's not in the house, Shirazu and Saiko are both playing one of Saiko's games on the living room's tv and when Mutsuki walks in, two pair of eyes settle on his frame and he gives a timid smile.
'Sleeping beauty has awaken, I guess there's no need for that kiss,' Saiko comments and Mutsuki swears there's a sigh somewhere in there.
Shirazu pouts, but the way his eyes glint say that he's finding the situation amusing. 'Aw, that sucks. We wanted to see who's your prince char-Oi! Saiko! Not fair!'
Mutsuki can't help but snort at the fact that Saiko took Shirazu's distraction to unpause the game and beat him. Without taking his eyes out of the game, Shirazu moves to the right of the couch to give Mutsuki some space for him to sit down.
When he does, he brings his feet up and sits crossed-legged. The coffee table is full of junk food and he doesn't bother asking if one of the bags belongs to his two teammates, he takes one and puts his hand inside. He's munching on some cheese chips when Saiko wins yet again.
Shirazu's cursing the living daylights out of her.
'Say, how long was I out?' He asks, genuinely curious.
''bout ten hours give or take,' Shirazu shrugs. Then after getting beat by Saiko yet again, he fishes out some money from his pocket and throws it at Saiko, Mutsuki raises an eyebrow at the blue-haired girl, who's more than happy to claim what's supposed to be the prize for beating Shirazu.
Mutsuki's now noticing the money that surrounds Saiko, and if Shirazu's retreat to the kitchen while fuming is anything to go by, they've been at it for a while. ( And Shirazu's losing )
Saiko's content, rubbing the money between her fingers and then mumbling happily, 'mamma's going to be buying a new set of headphones.'
'Hey Saiko, where's Sassan?'
She looks at him, tilts her head to the side and Mutsuki can almost see the gears working on her head to remember what Haise said, then, she speaks, 'Maman said something about going out to meet um, someone... it involves you though.'
Mutsuki can't help but frown, there's a question at the tip of his tongue to ask for a more specific answer, he notices movement out of the corner of his eye.
He turns his head to the spot and squints, but he can't see anything.
Though he swears he saw-
'I want a fucking rematch!' Shirazu's voice startle him, and the next moment the couch's dipping and Saiko's laughing softly.
'Bring it on, loser.'