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Kyo was having a nice night, he would say. He was in his dorm, and he just completed some schoolwork. He had already washed up and taken his meds, so he had some free time to do just about anything he wanted to until he needed to go to sleep. He stretched, and a yawn escaped him. Considering it looked like he wasn’t going to stay up much longer, he opted to play games for a little bit. He stood up from his desk, and moved to draw the curtains open, deciding to sit on the window sill as he booted up his console. It was a new moon kind of night, but he didn’t mind.
Then, suddenly, Ren burst through the door, looking very distressed, shouting, “Scarle’s sleeping with Aia and Maria!”
“And they didn’t invite us!” Aster unhelpfully tacked on as he poked his head from the doorway, devastated.
Kyo sighed sharply as he lowered his console, Ren and Aster inviting themselves in. If Kyo were none the wiser, what these two just said could be interpreted in the most normal sense, and he would have every right to be upset. He was still upset, because he knew at least one of them knew what they were saying, if not both of them. However, over the time he’s come to know them, Kyo has come up with a few translations, as well as a few coping mechanisms. In the current situation, what they were actually trying to say were the girls were having a sleepover, and from what he could tell, it was a girls’ only type of event.
“We need to convince them to let us in,” Ren declared as he took a seat at Kyo’s desk, Aster making himself comfortable on Kyo’s bed.
Kyo flinched, before clarifying, eyeing the alien from his periphery, “There is no we. I want no part of this.”
“But Kyo~, it won’t be as much fun without you!” Aster complained as he gave his best pleading face to the junior.
“So?” Kyo retorted as he looked down to watch his console shut down.
Ren furrowed his brows as he folded his arms, observing, “Kyo, I’m getting the feeling you don’t want to join us.” And Kyo just looked at him in silent disapproval, much like a cat does when you try to convince it to do something.
Aster, on the other hand, nodded along, suggesting, “Maybe he just wants to have one with us.” And Kyo switched his focus to Aster in disbelief.
“Yeah, you’re right! If the girls don’t want us, then we’ll just have to show them what they’re missing out on!” Ren concluded, and Kyo could not believe what was happening to him.
He tried to voice his disapproval, Ren and Aster not paying him any mind as they coordinated their boys only event. Aster offered to get takeout, Ren then opting to set up entertainment, and Kyo just knew there was no reasoning with them after that. After they were done talking, Aster left to pick up their food at the front gate, Ren turning on the TV in the meantime. He looked around for a bit, collecting all the necessary equipment Kyo had stored in the shelves of his stand, before turning around on his heels and looking at Kyo with the most expectant and giddy look the junior had ever seen from him.
“No,” Kyo flat out rejected as he stayed where he was.
“I didn’t even say anything!” Ren whined as his shoulders and smile dropped.
“You didn’t have to,” Kyo remarked, with that usual knowing and lecturing look of his.
“Kyo, come on~. It’ll be fun!”
“Says you! You two always do this! You plan shit without even listening to how I feel about it, and then I hate it! So no, and that’s final!”
“We’ll listen to you this time. I promise!”
“No!”
Ren sighed, then offering as he closed his eyes and shifted his weight to one foot, “We’ll watch whatever you want.”
Kyo remained quiet as he considered his options. On one hand, he could reject the offer, and continue trying to tell the alien how much he does not want any of the things they have planned from happening, but then that would just end up in Aster coming back with food, and the usual rhythm would return, with Kyo being the unwilling third wheel like he always is. On the other hand, he could fall asleep watching something he actually enjoyed.
With no other options left, since it was his dorm they marched in, and there was no way he was going to force himself to sleep in Ren’s, Kyo relinquished his console, huffing in defeat, “Fine.”
By the time Aster came back, Ren had everything already set up, Kyo having made himself comfortable on his bed as he put something on. Fortunately, they had the generosity to not only serve him, but also leave him alone on the bed, both opting to sit on the floor against the foot board. Even better, not a peep came from them as they watched whatever Kyo put on, both only responding when he talked to them. It was suspicious, and it put him on edge when he told them he needed to go to bed, and they just agreed with him. Ren collected all their trash, leaving the dorm to throw it away, and Aster turned off the lights.
It was quiet, and when he looked around, neither of them were in the room. After taking a second look, he confirmed Aster wasn’t sneaking around, or Ren wasn’t hiding in the darkest corners. He genuinely thought he could rest easy that night even after they visited, until he felt the bed dip on his right. Eyes wide open, he saw Aster settling in. With him. In his bed.
“What are you doing!?” he asked sharply under his breath because somehow he could not speak any louder.
Aster paused for a beat, but then replied just as quietly as he continued, “I’m getting into bed with you? Don’t worry. Ren’ll take the other side.”
“What!?”
Speak of the Devil and he shall appear, Ren came back into the dorm softly, asking in a hushed tone as he closed the door behind him, “Is he asleep, Aster?”
“The fuck I am!” Kyo snapped, finally able to raise his voice above a whisper.
“Kyo, come on~. It’s not that bad,” Aster tried to reason. “Are you really going to let the girls show us up?”
“Like I said, I want no part of this,” Kyo argued as he sat up, Ren already making his way to the left side of the bed.
“Look, it’s only weird if you make it weird. We’ll just be three bros sharing a bed,” Ren justified, Aster nodding along.
“Just relax, and when you wake up the next morning, we’ll be gone,” Aster added as Ren gently pushed Kyo back into bed, pulling the sheets over them, and draping his arm over the smaller, Aster doing the same.
“Hey!” Kyo squawked, trying his best to retract from the both of them when one of them got a little too close to a place he’d rather they didn’t.
“Sorry! Ren’s arm was in the way,” Aster apologized under his breath.
“Oh, sorry. Lemme make some room. Geez, Kyo, why are you so small?” Ren complained as Kyo felt Aster sling his arm over his shoulders.
“You fucking assholes! Let go of me!” Kyo demanded, but his command fell on deaf ears as neither senior moved a muscle. Soon enough, he realized they both had fallen asleep, their arms holding him in place between them. Cursing to himself, he guessed he might as well sleep as much as he could since he’s going to need all the rest he can get to recover from this torture.
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No. No! No way on God’s green earth was he going to fall asleep like this. Even if he could ignore all the subtle details and implications of doing so, with Ren’s freezing ass on his left, and Aster boiling up like an open oven on his right, there was no way Kyo was going to be able to find comfort in the moment. What didn’t help was that Ren provided no reprieve to Aster’s body temperature that somehow cranked up out of nowhere. It was like an iceberg being chucked at the sun, except the sun was rapidly increasing its heat, making the iceberg an even more futile attempt. The only reason why Ren hadn’t woken up in discomfort yet, if Kyo had to guess, was because Kyo was taking the brunt of Aster’s body temperature, and he felt like he was getting third degree burns just from being pressed against him. Whatever small defense their layers of clothes provided wasn’t enough because Kyo was pretty sure Aster was scorching through all of them.
And so, he did what you normally do to achieve equilibrium and return to homeostasis: he kicked Ren off and pushed Aster aside. Neither of them woke up, and Kyo hated that they slept like rocks, because he could use a verbal punching bag. Settling himself back into bed as he grumbled to himself, he could still feel their opposing body temperatures, but it wasn’t as overbearing like it was with him squished between them, so he could ignore it, even if he did have to sleep a little more on Ren’s side. Eventually, he fell asleep, as close as to peace as he could get that night.
When he woke up the next morning, he was at peace for 30 seconds, before all the anger he put aside from last night resurfaced when he saw his two uninvited guests still on the floor. Ren had a leg hanging from the bedside as he lied sprawled out on the floor like a chalk outline, and Aster was curled up in a ball on the other side. Kyo decided to give up at that point as he got out of bed because it was too early for him to be dealing with them. Someone had other plans, apparently, because not a second after Kyo passed by him, Aster had reached out for his ankle. Kyo tried to pull himself free, but Aster wasn’t letting go, his grip firm as it held Kyo’s ankle in place and his foot planted. Kyo was eventually able to yank himself free, with a lot of effort and the will to not lash out at the celestial. Aster whimpered as soon as Kyo left his grasp, but just as soon as he started, he quieted down.
Kyo had a moral battle with himself before kneeling down to check on the celestial. Looking through periwinkle locks, he saw Aster still asleep, his expression neutral. Not wanting to be bothered any longer, Kyo heaved himself up to his feet and left the dorm.
When he came back, Ren and Aster were still knocked out. Looking at his phone display, he had some time to rest up before his first class, so he did just that, making sure to kick Ren’s leg off the bed. The next time he woke up, he was not expecting the two bodies on his floor to be standing, dressed up and ready for the day, watching him intently. Needless to say, he was wide awake.
“What the Hell!?” he screeched as he shot up from his bed.
“Good morning Kyo,” Aster greeted warmly.
“You ready for the day?” Ren asked as he offered his hand to help him out.
“No!”
Honestly, between the two of them, Kyo couldn’t say who was more unbearable: Ren the alien who supposedly watched Earth for a couple of years but Kyo has no idea what he was watching, or Aster who says he’s lived on Earth for a good few decades but Kyo gets the feeling he was really only present for at most three, five if he’s feeling generous, which he wasn’t.