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Gar was acting odd.
Odder than usual.
He was jumpy. He seemed a little on the edge. Like something was out to get him. Maybe it was the whole entering "the Red" thing. It was probably getting to him or something. At least that was what Rachel thought until she realized that he was only getting odd around her.
"You think Gar is mad at me?" Rachel asks Kori, who sat across her drinking a cup of coffee. Kory frowned mid-sipping before resting the cup on the table, "Why would Gar be mad at you?" She inquired; Rachel simply shrugged at that before saying, " I don't know, he just seems...distant."
Gar was a touchy guy. He loved physical contact. Hugging was the equivalence of a handshake to him. He loved to touch. Rachel was certain physical touch was his love language. And out of all the Titans, Rachel was his favorite "cuddle buddy". He would put his arms around her shoulders, hug her every morning, and just a couple of days ago he started kissing her forehead, and all of a sudden he stopped. He went from touching her every day to barely looking at her. Maybe it was her paranoid brain, but Rachel swore he had flinched a couple of times when their bodies would accidentally make contact.
"I'm pretty sure Gar isn't mad at you." Kori assured her, but it didn't do much to comfort her, "he hasn't touched me in three days- no not like that!" Rachel yelped, frantically moving her hands and shaking her head in denial, "what?" Kori chuckled, "I didn't say anything," she let out, putting her hands up in mock surrender, "you didn't have to; I could hear that brain of yours misinterpreting my words like it was paid to." Rachel rebutted, making Kori shrug, presumably in defeat. Rachel sighed, rubbing her face in frustration. She didn't like it when she and Gar fought especially since 99.9% of the time it was her fault. She had a neck for hurting those around her, especially the shifter. In all honesty, she didn't even know how the other teen put up with her half the time, but from the look of things now; it looks like Gar had finally had enough of her crap.
"Hey, Rachel look at me," Kori said, her voice losing its teasing tone, now sounding sad and empathetic, Rachel reluctantly removed her hands from her face to look at the alien princess, who was now looking at her with pity and giving her a soft smile, "If you think Gar is mad at you why don't you just talk to him why, you know? clear the air." Kori advised. Rachel nodded in agreement before letting out a shaky breath, she had to talk to Gar for the sake of her sanity.
"Hey Gar, could I talk to you for a sec?" Rachel said, standing by the green-headed teen's doorframe, the teen in question was typing something on his phone before he turned his attention to her, Rachel expected Gar to frown at her or act uncomfortable, but he simply smiled and said: "sure," effectively making Rachel feel stupid for the questioning she was about to give him.
Maybe it is all in my head. Rachel dreadfully thought before crossing the threshold of Gar's door and making her way into the room. Rachel sat on the edge of the bed while Gar sat on the couch that was placed in front of the bed Rachel was seated on.
Silence prevailed as Rachel sat quietly, trying to collect her thoughts; wondering how she was going to phase her sentences without sounding pathetic and delusional.
"Are you mad at me?" Rachel asked. Wait to play it sooth Rachel. Rachel chided herself after Gar frowned at her like she was an idiot, like she asked if water was wet or if blood was red. Rachel knew she turned five shades redder with the heat she felt on her face.
"Why would I be mad at you?" Gar asked, sounding painfully confused. Rachel wanted the floor to swallow her whole.
"Because you- you..." don't touch me anymore. Is what Rachel wanted to say, but instead she mumbled: "You just seemed distance?" the uncertainty in her tone was as clear as the blush on her face. Rachel felt so stupid as she stared at Gar's feet because, for the life of her, she could not look the other teen in the eye.
"Oh...I didn't realize." Rachel heard Gar mutter. "I'm sorry," Gar apologized. Bless his bleeding heart.
Hearing those words, Rachel looked up at the other teen, who was already looking at her with an apologetic smile on his face. He was so beautiful.
"Apology accepted," Rachel smiled back at him.
"So...wanna play video games?" Gar asked, Rachel grinned at that. They were good.
They were not good.
Gar didn't go back to normal. Normal being showering her with love and physical affection. He smiled at her, joked with her and they still played video games together, but no touching, but not one pat on the shoulder. It was driving her crazy. He was driving her crazy.
"If Gar had no intention of hugging and holding me for the rest of our lives then he shouldn't have done so in the first place!" Rachel complained to the Kryptonian. She had to vent and Conner was her best bet. Dick is terrible at emotions and Kory would just tease her, so the superboy was her best and only option.
"I sound insane, don't I?" Rachel groaned as she covered her face with the pillow, "a little," Conner admitted, making Rachel scream into it.
"I think you're just touch-starved," Conner concluded, Rachel throw the pillow at him in response, which he caught with ease, "I'm not touch-starved," Rachel denied making Conner give her an unamused look in return, "you are," Conner insisted, "good news is all you have to do is hug or handshake any of the other titans and you will get your fix." Conner reasoned, forever the voice of reason, "You are making it sound like I'm an addict," Rachel huffed out as she fell backward onto the other boy's bed.
"Okay little birdy bring it in," Conner said, standing up and opening his arms out to Rachel, inviting her into a hug, "this is so embarrassing," Rachel said as she reluctantly hugged the younger teen, "So, how are you feeling?" Conner asked, tightening his hold on her shoulder, "is it working?" Conner implored, Rachel closed her eyes and breathed Connor gives good hugs, maybe she was just touch-starved.
"Thanks, Kon," Rachel smiled up at the taller teen before releasing her hold on him, "anytime Rachel."
Rachel was going to be okay.
Rachel was not okay.
"No freaking way!" Gar cheered, wrapping his arms around the new 'boy wonder', "Take that you lab rat!' Gar mocked the raven-head teen who rolled his eyes half-heartedly, "Tim Drake you are the love of my life!" Gar gushed out, pulling the older teen into a tight hug, Tim had just beaten the unbeatable Conner at some video game, and apparently, that was all it took for Gar to grovel. "Don't let Bernard hear you say that," Tim warned but returned the hug nonetheless because why would he pass off the chance to hug Gar? why would anyone? Gar gave the best hugs, Rachel would know she was at the receiving end of that hugs numerous times. She fought the feeling of rage that wash over her at the sight of Gar giving Tim, a boy he barely knew, the hug he had been holding her off on. Rachel pretended to be enticed by her phone, hoping they don't feel or hear her blood boiling.
"Oh, don't baby Superman," Gar cooed, "even losers get hugs, better luck next time, yeah?" Gar said, now hugging the other teen from the side, "Get away from me you meanie," Conner huffed out, but made no move to escape Gar's hold, because then again why would he? Why would anyone?! "Come on baby brother you know I love you," Gar said, and just like he did the worse thing possible, he kissed Conner's temple. Rachel had enough. She abruptly got up and stormed out of the living room.
"Rachel, are you okay?" Rachel heard Gar's voice at her bedroom door, "Go away!" Rachel said loudly back, she didn't want to talk to him much less see him. "I won't leave until you tell me what's going on?" Gar insisted, making Rachel roll her eyes in annoyance. "Fine," she groaned before, getting up off her bed and making her way to her door, "what?" she asked, cringing immediately after realizing how rude and mean she sounded, "sorry, I-I didn't mean to-"
"What's going on?" Gar asked softly, he looked so concerned for her, it made her feel like absolute shit, "I'm just-" Rachel gulped. She didn't know why she was so angry, angry at him, at Tim, at Conner.
"I'm just angry, okay?" Rachel sighed, feeling incredibly frustrated, Gar nodded his head in understanding as though he "got it", as if he could fathom what she was feeling. Rachel felt stupid and pathetic, "Would you like to talk about it? I'm all ears," Gar offered, giving her another one of his pity smiles, the one you would give a crazy, paranoid person, he felt sorry for her.
"I- no, I just want to be alone, okay?" Rachel requested and like always Gar didn't push it, he respected her wishes and walked away. And boy did she wish he didn't. At least just this once, she wished he would care enough to stay.
It was 8 o'clock in the morning, Rachel sat quietly at the kitchen isle, eating her cereal, and beside her was Gar. They barely exchanged words, no jokes, no silly banter. Gar didn't try to talk to her and for that, Rachel was grateful because she didn't feel like pretending to be okay 'cause she wasn't. She could feel Gar stare every so often as if he wanted to say something, but every time he decides against it. Good, because the last thing the goth wanted was small talk.
"Rachel, why are you angry at me?" Gar asked, voice barely a whisper, "did I do something?" he inquired. Rachel rolled her eyes at that but didn't look at him, she really wasn't in the mood for any of this.
"Rachel?" Gar's voice now was edging irritation. He was losing his patience.
"Leave. Me. Alone," Rachel said, now looking at Gar who frowned at her in confusion and with how his lip was quirking up, irritation or disgust.
"What's going on with you?" Gar asked, he sounded confused, disturbed, and slightly disappointed.
"You. You're what's going on with me?" Rachel said, her voice cracking a little at the end, she hoped didn't Gar notice, but he did; if how his eyes softened was anything to go by. Crap. She had to leave.
"Rachel," Rachel heard Gar call for her as she made her way out of the kitchen, "Rachel!"
The second Rachel reached her room she locked the door and just in the nick of time, because Gar was this close to making his way into her room, "Come on Rachel, open the door," Rachel heard Gar, "Rachel, please open the door," Gar said, standing by her bedroom door, "How about no," Rachel responded, "why do you want to talk anyway?" Rachel questioned, "There is nothing to talk about." Rachel couldn't see him, but she knew Gar rolled her eyes at that, "Yes, there is! Now stop acting like a child and open the door...please." Gar continued on, but Rachel wasn't going to cave. Gar might be an unstoppable force, but she was an immovable object.
Then all of a sudden: silence. Gar seemingly gave up. Rachel tried not to feel too disappointed. She sighed in defeat, before laying on her bed.
"Can we please talk?" Rachel's head snapped at the sound of Gar's voice. How the heck did he-
"Window, I turned into birdy," Gar informed her, with her towel around his waist! The disrespect! Rachel glared up at her from where she sat, but she caved. Might as well get this over with.
"Why are you acting so-"
"Distant?" Rachel interjected.
"Yeah," Gar agreed, "What I don't understand is why?"
"You started it," Rachel accused, glaring up at the shifter who sighed before sitting next to her on the edge of her bed, leaving a small distance between the two of them, making sure their knees and shoulders weren't touching, making Rachel feel more aggravated, "That right there!" Rachel screamed standing up abruptly, startling the other teen, "you're there one being distant," Rachel claimed, earning herself a look of confusion from the green-head teen, "how the hell am I being distant when I'm the one forcing you to talk to me?!" Gar challenged, looking up at her from where she stood, "Just talk to me...please," Gar begged, looking at Rachel as if he was the one in pain; like he was the one who was hurting. Rachel wanted him gone, no she wanted him. She wanted him to touch her. She felt so frustrated.
"Rachel..." Gar said her name softly, standing up from the bed then he did something unexpected he placed his hand on her cheek, wiping away the tears Rachel didn't realize fell from her eyes.
Rachel gasped in surprise, which made Gar remove his hand from her cheek with haste, "Do I disgust Gar?" Rachel asked, looking at Gar with complete hopelessness, she felt stupid, ridiculous, and pathetic for asking such a question, but she couldn't help it, she couldn't go another day without knowing why Gar didn't want her close physically, "no, never," Gar answered without hesitation, "Then why?" Rachel asked, slowly moving into Gar's personal bubble, making Gar move a step back, "Why do you flinch away from me, why won't you touch me?" And to that, Gar's eyes widened in surprise.
"What if I like touching you a little too much, what if I'm scared of overstepping and ruining our friendship?" Gar admitted, "What if I want to hold you; to do more than just hug you," Rachel couldn't believe what she was hearing.
"What if I want to kiss you?" That sentence was all it took for Rachel to kiss the older teen square on the lips. All frustration and sadness melted away when their lips touched. Rachel felt like a thirsty man in the desert and Gar was a spring of water, and Rachel drank away, after a few seconds of being completely still Gar kiss her back, putting her desperation to shame, because clearly if it were a competition Gar would surely win. He kissed her so fiercely, biting at her lower lip, making her gasp, and he seized the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth, Rachel could taste the Cocoa Puffs he had eaten, but with the way he held her head in place and devouring her mouth you'd think he didn't eat breakfast and Rachel was not ashamed to admit she was no different with the way she mimicked his movements and chased his mouth when he separated himself from her a second too long.
They pulled apart much much later to collect their breath, Rachel felt lightheaded; sated. Gar looked out of it, almost feral, with dilated pupils and disheveled hair. He looked like the opposite of sated he looked ravenous.
"You have no idea how long I've been dying to do this," Gar breathed out, leaning towards her shoulder and kissing it, "is that so? I was under the impression you wanted me as far away from you as humanly possible," Rachel mocked, but the insecurity was evident in her tone, "Far from it," Gar chuckled, now colliding their heads together, "I told Dick about my obsession with you and he told me to stop touching you, supposedly after doing so I won't feel the need to anymore," Gar rolled his eyes at that, "I'm pretty sure he is just scared I'll get you pregnant," he laughed, while Rachel choked at the admission.
"Gar!" Both Gar and Rachel's heads turned at the sound of Dick's very furious voice, "You think he saw my clothes piled up at your doorstep?" Gar gulped, and Rachel nodded in response.
"He's going to kick my ass," Gar groaned, "I'll protect you," Rachel assured him as she kissed his lips again, "Is that so?" Gar asked with a raised eyebrow, "yeah, It is," she affirmed, grinning up at him, before they connected their lips again into another heated kiss, ignoring Dick's threats of breaking down the door.