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Joy and laughter were no harder to find on Earthbread than sadness and tears. Each time Kouign Amann Cookie thought about it, her fists tightened until her nails dug her palms red and raw. It wasn't fair. When were things ever fair? Sometimes, Kouign Amann wished she could just take all the world's suffering so that even for a split second, everyone could be at peace. But she wasn't a saint or a hero. She was only a stubborn brat that didn't know when to stop, and sometimes, to her, that was enough. If she couldn't stop people from crying, she would just be there to wipe away their tears.
That was what the young paladin reminded herself as she sluggishly walked up the stairs with a jug of water in hand. Each step she took felt torturously heavy. Gravity weighed her down greatly and the sounds of floorboards creaking were luring her back into sleep. Closing the door behind her, the girl made it to her bed and sat on the edge of it. Her body screamed for rest, but she couldn't go back to the sleep she so deeply desired just yet. The cookie crawled forward, opened her arms wide, and let herself half-fall on top of another person on the bed. She wrapped an arm around the individual's neck while the other combed through their soft hair that felt burning (literally) against her palm.
"Capsaicin?... How are you feeling? Any better yet? I brought some water if you want..." She whispered into the other cookie's ears, her voice drowsy accompanied by an ugly yawn.
The person, Capsaicin Cookie, her roommate and partner, stayed still and didn't respond, except for the occasional wet hiccups. His bad nights were always like this. Capsaicin has a breakdown, she calms them down and maybe they talk about it in the morning. Everyone had bad days, and her partner didn't have a particularly pleasant upbringing. There was no burden on her side, this was just a part of loving Capsaicin. There was only one thing that made her upset. When the crying ceased, so did the talking. It was like he was ashamed to speak to her, and it ticked her off. It ticked her off that maybe her partner still felt hesitant to share their feelings with her. It ticked her off that maybe she wasn't enough for them. But she knew better than to dwell on those thoughts. Capsaicin needed time and gentleness, not pressure. So she continued to hug him while willing herself to not fall asleep because Capsaicin was just so warm and comfy and- Nope, Kouign Amann, this isn't very knightly of you! Don't you dare doze off!
After a few minutes of silence, Capsaicin finally moved. The cookie slowly began to shift themselves up straight and gently pried away the smaller arms wrapping protectively around them. The bigger set the smaller down on the bed, ignoring her squirming and concerned look. The occasional hiccups never stopped, and as Capsaicin laid down comfortably between Kouign Amann's arms and buried his head into her neck, the bigger looked like a kicked puppy with his teary eyes, scrunched up brows and hair sticking onto his face. It was a side of Capsaicin Cookie, the "Spice Overlord", that they wouldn't show to the world if it killed them. In other words, it was a side of Capsaicin Cookie only Kouign Amann could see.
"Please, stay…" Capsaicin muttered under his breath, the words came out ragged and desperate as he wrapped his big burly arms tight around the other's petite frame. The cookie felt himself heating up again, his hair slowly gaining heat, crackling, and bright red. There was also a light sizzling sound, somewhere, coming from someone. But he didn't know, didn't feel like knowing. The bedding felt warm and unpleasant against their skin, but soon enough, they felt themselves slipping again. Their body felt oh so heavy, and they were sinking once more. Into that endless void, where burning chains tied him down and lava stuck in his throat stopping him from speaking, from screaming. Help... Help! The pain of being born, of being alive. It wasn't fair. What did he do to deserve all of this? He was strong enough, he could control his powers. So why was he being chained down again? Capsaicin could only curl into himself and sob, letting his body sink into the abyss.
And then a humming voice rang into the void, and suddenly he was there again, in his bedroom, safe and free. It took Capsaicin a moment to connect the pieces and figured out that it was Kouign Amann, his partner, singing. He recognized it. It was a lullaby her caretakers sang to her when she was a child and the song she always sang for them when they had their night terrors now. The song felt like a soft grass meadow with soft breezes brushing through his hair, and Amann's voice was a gentle embrace that held him tightly, telling him everything was going to be alright. She would protect him from everything evil in this world, he recalled her declaring so the day they got together, her hands holding his tight and warm. And he trusted her. With all his heart. Because he was here with her, and he was safe.
Capsaicin's arms around Kouign Amann never loosened, like they were afraid the other would disappear if they let go. Soon enough, the both of them fell asleep, falling into a dreamless slumber. The occasional hiccups never stopped, but it was alright now.
**********
"Morning, Cuddle Bear<3" Capsaicin placed a kiss on Kouign Amann's forehead as she sat down.
The girl only mumbled back an incoherent 'G'morning' and rubbed her eyes but the sleepiness didn't quite go away. She was never really a morning person, and after the previous night's situation, she now felt even worse. A plate of jelly beans and toast was set down before her along with a fresh glass of fruit juice. Then another plate across her and another matching glass to go with it. Breakfast began some moments after the TV was turned on, and the two ate their meals in somewhat comfortable silence.
Mornings after Cap's night terrors always felt a bit off and uncomfy. Kouign always insisted she would be there to help and never had a single complaint about them, but he couldn't help but feel embarrassed like he was bothering her with his little tantrums. It would take a while before he could get used to this, gentle love stuff. They sighed before taking a sip of their juice.
"Thanks for making me breakfast again, Caps. You're the best." Kouign stood up and walked over to them, hugging them from behind and leaning on them. She was still sleepy after finishing her meal. "So, you got any plans for today? If you're free, we can go out and visit the town fair. They just opened yesterday. I wonder if there's anything new."
"Uh huh," Caps hummed, hands intertwining with the ones messing with his hair. A date sounded nice. He could clear his head and make up for Kouign yesterday. The taller was stuck in his thoughts before he saw light marks on the other's arms. They weren't bruises, but they couldn't possibly be pleasant either. Were these… "Amann, where did these marks come from?"
"Oh," Kouign raised her hands to touch them, her light hiss making him want to disappear on the spot. ", These are nothing. You were emotional last night and heated up a little bit. It's no big deal." Kouign took a step away and gave them an assuring smile.
Caps knew she wouldn't lie to him, but that didn't make it any better. He had hurt her, accidental or not. He had proved to himself that he couldn't control his powers. But being ridiculed and laughed at was a far better punishment than what he was seeing right now, seeing his loved ones hurt by him. Caps looked away, not daring to touch the smaller. "Oh, Kouign, I'm so… I'm so sorry… I," Tears welled up in his eyes and his breathing hitched.
Kouign Amann has always been headstrong, doing anything she deemed fit despite what anyone says. And right now, what she wanted to do was to charge head first at her partner and comfort them, to hug them tight and never let go, to stop those tears before they dared to fall down their beautiful face, and from ever falling again. But she wouldn't. Capsaicin needed gentleness, and she would give him so.
"It's alright, Caps. You didn't mean to hurt me. I know you would never do such things." She placed her hands firmly on the other's shoulders, waiting for them to look at her. "And it's alright… It felt, nice." Oops, didn't mean to let that slip out.
"What"
"What"
Good job, future paladin. You messed it up again. The girl's face heated up like a kettle and she wanted to dig a hole and hide away forever. The both of them were now looking at each other, no one knowing how to break the awkward silence.
"Oh, well, erm, okay." Caps stood up and took her hands. "Let's get some healing cream for those bruises now, shall we?" He led him to the living room, seemingly ignoring what she just said.
Kouign had always had a strange obsession with pain and pressure. For example, the way the girl always wore her clothes a bit too tight or stretched a bit too much before training. It was a problem they would definitely have to go through in the future. They had plenty of time together for that after all. Right now, it was medicine time.
"... So… Am I still getting that date?" Kouign asked while applying cream to her bruises.
"Of course we are! I'm gonna make sure we have the best date ever!"
"Yay!"