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It had been a long shift. They had already worked 24 hours, and then went three hours over at the last call. They'd gone 27 hours with barely any food and even less sleep. On top of that, they lost several people before they could put the fire out. They were all exhausted. The usual chatter was gone, replaced by tired silence. Even Chim wasn't cracking his usual jokes. Bobby had retreated to his office to begin working on paperwork. The rest of the crew was slowly filtering out and heading home.
Buck is sitting on one of the benches, staring off into empty space. His eyes are distant. His jaw is tight, his fists clenched in his lap. Eddie can tell something's wrong. He's not sure what, but he knows that something is definitely off. He slowly makes his way into Buck's line of vision. He looks up when he sees Eddie, and a small smile appears on his face. It's the one reserved specifically for Eddie.
"You okay?"
"Yeah. Just tired."
There's more to it than that, but Eddie chooses not to push. Buck will talk when he's ready. He grimaces when he stands, but waves off Eddie's attempted help with a muttered 'I'm fine'. He gives Eddie a smile, but it's tense. He claims he's simply sore from all the work today. Eddie still doesn't believe that's all it is, but he pushes his worry away in favor of getting them both home. He sends Carla a quick text to let her know they're on their way. She sends back a thumbs up and a smiley face emoji.
The ride home is fairly silent. Music quietly echoes from the speakers, barely audible. It's more of a background noise than anything else. The two don't speak much, both unpacking the day on their own. The only time they converse is when Eddie asks Buck if thai is okay for dinner. Buck nods yes, eyes never straying from the road. Eddie doesn't have to ask what Buck wants. They have a tradition. They get the same things every time.
They beat the delivery man home. Buck unlocks the door as Eddie grabs their stuff. He tosses it all down in the hallway to be dealt with later. Future him will deal with it all. For now, he just wants to sit down with a cold beer. Buck seems to have the same idea, as he's already rustling around the fridge for them. He passes one to Eddie before taking a swig of his own. Carla meets them in the kitchen.
"You two look exhausted. Long day?"
"Longest one we've had in a while. How was your day with Chris?"
"Wonderful as always, Eddie. You know that he's a complete angel. I have to run, but I'll see you both later. Take it easy tonight!"
"Will do, Carla," Buck says with a joking salute.
Eddie practically melts into his seat. That's exactly when the doorbell rings, signaling the arrival of the food. Eddie lets out a groan, throwing his head back in frustration.
"Don't worry. I've got it," Buck chuckles.
Eddie sighs in relief. That relief wavers when he notices Buck's stride is a bit off. Not enough to properly be classified as a limp, but still enough of a difference to be concerning. It's probably just a strained muscle or something. He'll bring it up to Buck later, when they're both fed and rested.
The doorbell also summoned Chris from his room. He greets Eddie with a tight hug. He waits until Buck puts the food down to give him a hug too. Buck gets this soft look on his face whenever he sees Chris. It's one Eddie is all too familiar with. It's a look of pure love, the way a parent looks at their child. The fact that Buck loves Chris that much never fails to make his heart almost shatter with the amount of love he feels for the man.
Buck takes a seat next to Eddie and doles out the food. They all dig in, sharing stories about their day. Eddie and Buck stray away from any stories about darker calls. They stick to the funnier ones. Chris tells them about his classmates and the latest drama. There's so much drama it's practically a real life telenovela. Eddie doesn't remember having this much drama when he was this age, but that was a long time ago.
After dinner, the trio works together to quickly clean up. Chris brings the dishes to the sink, Buck washes, and Eddie dries. They have a routine in place. They have many routines ingrained in their daily lives, and Buck is a part of all of them. Eddie doesn't know how the two of them lived for so long without Buck in their lives. He appeared and became the piece of their family they didn't know they were missing.
"Can we watch a movie?"
"Sure, kiddo. Which one are you thinking?"
Chris shrugs at Eddie's question. The three of them head over to the couch. Chris squishes in between Buck and Eddie. They settle on 'Strange World'. It's one of the better movies Buck has seen in a while. And if Eddie cries a little bit while watching it, no one says anything. Eddie notices that Buck isn't paying much attention. His face is a little pale, and his right hand is digging into his thigh.
Eddie shoots him a questioning look over Chris' head. Buck shakes his head to signify that everything is alright. Eddie raises a skeptical eyebrow, but doesn't pursue the issue further.
By the end of the movie everyone is drifting off. Buck ushers Chris off to bed while Eddie sets up the couch. He wouldn't mind having Buck share his bed with him. They did all throughout COVID. And they did it before that too, and after, whenever they had nightmares. It helped to have the company. And Eddie can admit that he misses sleeping next to Buck. They would wake up tangled together, and for a moment, Eddie could pretend that they were something more than friends. It may be selfish, but he's weak when it comes to Buck.
"He's out like a light."
Eddie chuckles. It turns into a yawn.
"Get some sleep. I'll make us some waffles in the morning."
"I'll never say no to your waffles. Night, Buck."
"Night, Eddie."
Eddie clicks off the light on his way out. He's asleep the moment his head hits the pillow.
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It's close to 2 AM when Eddie wakes up thirsty. He blindly pats the nightstand next to him, but his water bottle is nowhere to be found. He must have forgotten to replace it. He rubs his eyes and slowly clambers out of bed. He tip toes into the kitchen. He fills a cup with water and drains it. He's about to head back to bed, but he hears rustling coming from the living room. He peeks in at Buck. He's clearly awake, though Eddie can't figure out why.
"Buck? You okay?"
"Fine."
Buck's voice is choked. He sounds like he's in pain. Eddie flicks the light on. Buck's face is covered in sweat. He's biting down on his wrist, trying to stifle any sounds of pain. Eddie runs over and kneels next to him, eyes scanning him for any injuries. Did he miss something earlier? He had checked Buck over and hadn't seen anything. Fear roars through his veins, drowning out everything else.
"What's wrong? Where are you hurt?"
"Leg. Bad one."
Eddie pulls the covers back. Buck's bad leg, the one that had been caught under the truck, is practically writhing. It's the worst muscle cramp Eddie has ever seen. It looks like snakes are slithering under his skin. He knows what to do when Chris gets leg cramps. His are never this bad, but the same things should theoretically work. He slides himself under Buck's legs so that they rest on his thighs. Buck fights back a whimper at the movement. His wrist is bright red from where he'd been biting down on it. He tries to muffle his cries again, but Eddie pulls his hand away so that he doesn't injure himself.
"Chris. Don't wanna wake him," Buck croaks out.
Even when he's crying in pain, his first concern is Chris. Chris always comes first for him.
"Chris is okay. He sleeps like a log. Let me help you."
Eddie applies the lightest of pressure to Buck's leg. Buck cries out and tries to push his hands away, but Eddie doesn't stop.
"I know it hurts. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. But it'll help your leg feel better."
Causing Buck pain is killing him, but he knows that massaging the leg might be the only thing that can help. He starts with gentle pressure, feeling the muscle tense a bit before relaxing underneath his hand. He continues massaging it until it relaxes completely. Buck sighs in relief, the exhaustion of everything catching up to him.
"Thank you," he whispers.
"Get some sleep. We'll talk in the morning."
Buck nods. Eddie slides out from underneath him. He flicks the light off, but hovers in the doorway for a bit to make sure Buck is really okay. He doesn't know how long he stands there. Instead of heading back to his room, he opts to grab an extra blanket and sit in the living room. He falls asleep watching over Buck.
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Eddie wakes up to the smell of waffles and the sound of laughter. He breathes that in for a moment before opening his eyes. He stands up, his back cracking. Sleeping in a chair is not so good for his body at this age. He makes his way to the kitchen. Buck and Chris are making waffles. Eddie leans against the doorway and watches them with a soft smile on his face.
"Morning dad!" Chris crows.
"Morning, kiddo. What're you guys doing up so early?"
"It's not early. It's 10 AM."
"That's early by adult time," Buck chimes in. "Sorry about waking you."
"Don't worry about it. If you didn't, I would have slept through your waffles. And that would be a tragedy of its own."
"Just for that, you get the first waffle of the day!"
Buck places it on a plate. It smells amazing. Chris tries to snatch it from him, but Eddie holds it above his head so Chris can't reach it. Buck laughs at their antics, handing Chris a waffle as well. They all take their usual seats at the table. Chris douses his waffle in syrup. With a sticky smile, he thanks Buck for making breakfast. Buck ruffles the boy's hair and tells him he's happy to do it.
"Consider it my share of rent."
"You don't have to pay rent. This is your home just as much as ours," Eddie says.
Buck blushes, but doesn't comment. Once Chris finishes his food, he runs to his room to play some video games with friends. Buck and Eddie clean up, working in tandem like usual. After that they sit on the couch with fresh cups of coffee. Eddie drinks his black, but Buck puts an insane amount of sugar into his. He's the reason why Eddie has a sugar jar next to the coffee machine.
"I'm sorry about last night."
"You don't have to apologize. You didn't do anything wrong."
"I could've handled it on my own. I didn't need to bother you with it."
"First off, you're never bothering me. I want to help you. Second, you make it sound like you've been through this before."
"The cramps happen. The ones like last night don't happen as often. But when they do, I handle them fine by myself."
"You've had cramps like that before? And you've done it alone?"
Buck shrugs like it's no big deal. Like he hasn't suffered through this pain on his own, god knows how many times.
"Why didn't you wake me up?"
"I was fine. Really."
"You were writhing in pain last night. I'd say that's far from 'fine'. I don't want you suffering alone, Buck."
"You don't need to deal with my issues."
"Your issues are my issues. You're my partner. I have your back, just like you have mine. I want to help you. The idea of you being in that kind of pain, dealing with it alone, terrifies me. I want you to ask me for help. I want to take care of you."
Buck stares at Eddie, his eyes holding a mixture of confusion and something else Eddie can't quite identify.
"Why? Why do you want to take care of me?"
Eddie can tell what Buck is silently saying.
I'm not worth it.
"Because you deserve the same amount of love you show to everyone else. Because you deserve to be cared for instead of always caring for others. Because-"
Eddie hesitates. If he crosses this line, they can't go back. Eddie looks Buck in the eyes. He realizes what the unknown emotion is. Love.
"Because I love you."
Before he can react, Buck's lips are on his. His hands cup Eddie's face, pulling him close. The kiss is desperate, loving, saying everything that they've been holding back for years.
"I love you too. So much."
Eddie can't help but kiss Buck again. It's addicting, and he never wants to stop. Still, he forces himself to pull away.
"Promise me you'll ask for help when you need it. Let me take care of you the way you have always taken care of me."
"Okay. I'll try."
It's not a complete promise. But it's a start, and that's enough for Eddie.
Buck knows he's loved. Everything else can come later.