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It was dark. The void, Zahras, wherever they were- Claude wasn’t a fan. It could be worse of course. Even though the person responsible for starting the war in the first place was a stone’s throw away from them, Edelgard’s company was still preferable over Rhea’s. At least from Claude’s perspective. He could tell that the current King of Faerghus didn’t agree, but there wasn’t much room for complaining. It’s not like any of them wanted to be there. Dimitri’s mercenary buddy had gone off the deep end and trapped the lot of them here. Sure, he claimed it was actually the fault of this spirit-demon thing that had been living in his head, but at the end of the day it was Shez’s body that teleported and trapped them here. At least he had the decency to keep Edelgard occupied away from them.
“Tell me, Claude,” Dimitri said, breaking the silence that had formed between the two of them. “What do you hope to accomplish after this war is over?”
Claude chuckled. The guarded expression on His Majesty’s face was all too clear. Just because they were allies currently did not mean Dimitri was putting much faith in their alliance. Not that Claude could blame him. He did have a reputation after all. “What, worried I have some nefarious plot up my sleeve?”
“Do you?” Dimitri questioned.
“Believe it or not, I don’t,” Claude denied. He could tell Dimitri wasn’t convinced, so he just shrugged. “You may not like what I have planned, but it’s not some scheme I’ve been purposefully hiding from you. The timing was just never right whenever you asked about it.”
“And how is my timing now?” Dimitri asked.
“Couldn’t be better, Your Majesty,” Claude smirked. “You’re really not going to like what I’ve been considering, so I’m just going to come out and say it.” There was no point in hiding anything in the void. The odds of them returning home at this rate were slim to none, so what’s the point of ambitions if there’s no way back to pursue them? “After the war, I’m going to work to dismantle the Central Church and kill the archbishop. The people of Fódlan have been shackled by this decrepit system for too long, and I'm going to end it.”
Dimitri paused for a moment before shaking his head slowly in what seemed to be disapproval. Not that Claude was surprised. The Kingdom had allied itself with the church long before Claude added the Alliance to the picture. “You’re going to do away with the church? You realize they are our allies here, right?”
“Correction, Your Majesty, the church is your ally here. I am also your ally, permitted you don’t try and stop me after the war is over,” Claude said.
“What happened to that partnership with the Kingdom you said you wanted to last for years beyond the war?” Dimitri asked.
“And what happened to the idea that you’d toss the church leaders to the streets provided your people no longer have need of them?” Claude questioned. “Just do me a favor and think about where I’m coming from here. Who steals your freedom and gives you an endless list of duties and obligations simply because you have a Crest? Who forces you and your friends into a bunch of unwanted marriages and positions of power? The church even forbids any official contact with outside regions! Not exactly great for Faerghus, right? Being as close to Sreng and Albinea as you are.”
“Just to be clear, your quarrel is with the church, yes? Not with Faerghus itself?” Dimitri asked.
“Exactly. I have no desire to fight you, Dimitri. And really, our enemy isn't the actual church so much as the people at the top who make all the decisions,” Claude explained. None of it was a lie. The idea of raising arms against the Kingdom had crossed his mind at one point, but the thought of actually going through with it… No, it wasn’t something Claude was willing to seriously consider.
He expected Dimitri to argue with him and try to counter with statements about all of the good Rhea has done over the years, but to his surprise, the king nodded. “I understand where you're coming from, Claude, and on a personal level I actually agree with you.”
He could tell right away that Dimitri’s statement was unfinished, with his eyes glancing down at the ground to stare at the weird rocks that made up the void. “But as a king you’re opposed, right?” Claude asked, attempting to finish his sentence for him.
“Yes,” Dimitri admitted.
“Why?” Claude pushed.
“I have three reasons.”
“Let me hear them.”
Dimitri sighed, as if he wasn’t exactly sure where to start. He claimed to have three reasons, and Claude believed him, but he got the feeling Dimitri wasn’t prepared to explain them off the top of his head. “First, abolishing the church would deny the king's right, my right to rule Faerghus. Without one, the people will descend into chaos and war. Would you be able to take responsibility for such a thing, once it came to pass?”
Claude had a hard time believing that statement. He wasn’t even from the Kingdom and he struggled to think of holding a weapon to Dimitri. In fact, Dimitri was the sole reason he chose to not go down the path he considered before, the one that involved siding with the Empire and invading the Kingdom to get to Rhea faster. There was no way the majority of Kingdom citizens would be that easily swayed to turn against Dimitri just because Rhea wasn’t around. “From what I’ve seen, your people love you. I have to believe that goes beyond a simple blessing provided by the church.”
Besides, if Edelgard or another outside force succeeded in killing Rhea, it was even more unlikely that the Kingdom citizens would blame Dimitri and question his right to rule. Claude was more than willing to be that outside force if necessary.
“Do you remember when I received my crown? The circumstances that led to my coronation? My hold on the throne is fragile. I am trying to secure it, and I have been for almost three years now, but some of the other nobles would challenge it should the church suddenly be dismantled,” Dimitri explained.
Claude nodded, understanding his point a little bit more. Citizens were one thing, but the nobility was another. If stuck-up nobles were the problem though, he would have no issue assigning some extra bodies to help defend Dimitri’s hold on the throne. With the roundtable setup in his favor, it would hardly be a problem convincing the other voting nobles to assist in keeping their alliance with the Kingdom secure. “What are the other two reasons?”
“Second, recklessly discarding the church will only incite discord among the clergy and its supporters.”
“Perhaps how Edelgard is doing it yes, but I-”
“And finally, a revolution of this nature will not only mean casualties among the common folk, but will endanger your own life as well,” Dimitri finished, cutting Claude off before he could explain himself.
That last point caught Claude by surprise. Dimitri was a king who was very protective of his people, even going as far as to toss aside his own personal beliefs to uphold theirs. To hear concern about someone who wasn’t from the Kingdom, concern that sounded similar to Claude’s own mindset about Dimitri…
“I have some serious issues with that last one,” Claude frowned. Why was Dimitri worried about his safety? Was it pity? “I'm glad you're concerned for my safety, but I can take care of myself.”
“But don't you see? The people you wish to dispose of are human, just as you are. No matter what ingenious scheme you come up with or how careful you try to be, they will suffer. And their vengeance will eventually find you, no matter how hard you try to stave it off. I know full well the guilt that accompanies such actions... and the retribution they provoke,” Dimitri said, his voice growing soft. There was a pain in his eyes that Claude hadn’t seen before. It wasn’t a new hurt, but one the king had clearly worked to keep hidden.
“Everyone has to deal with the consequences of their decisions,” Claude said. He could still feel the slap of his bowstring against his arm guard, and hear the hollow thud as the arrow pierced its target. He had fired many arrows, but that one stuck with him. “If you let it rule you, Fódlan never changes. And if it doesn't change, it'll just fall apart.”
“But not taking the time to look where you're going will only lead you to stumble and fall. And if there are those who would be hurt by this, I consider it my duty to help them,” Dimitri pushed. “You included.”
“There you go, trying to save everyone again. You really are too good for me!” Claude teased.
A faint blush rose to color the king’s cheeks. It was so subtle though, clearly a trick of the light, or rather lack of light, or some other explanation if Claude had to guess. “To be honest, I'm jealous of how you're not burdened with the same restrictions,” Dimitri admitted.
“In the world I'm trying to create, you wouldn't be burdened by them either. You could even…” Claude hadn’t even realized he was moving closer towards the king until they were practically chest to chest. He paused and took a small step back, turning quickly to hide the rising flush in his cheeks. “No, forget it.”
“Forget what?” Dimitri asked, taking a step forward, closing the gap Claude created.
“I really do admire how you want to save everyone. Honestly, if you weren't a king, I think we could've been friends,” Claude said, still not meeting his eyes.
“I feel much the same. Had I joined with you before the church, I might have been able to see a different vision of Fódlan.”
“Why don’t you join me now?” Claude offered, finally looking back at him.
“I have a duty to my people,” Dimitri said.
“And you think I don’t?” Claude countered.
“I didn’t say that-”
“I take my duty to my people very seriously,” Claude continued, cutting Dimitri off. “You don’t know what I’ve done to keep them safe, to keep them out of this war for as long as possible, to protect them from threats that come from sources outside of the Empire. I may not be the most honorable person out there, but don’t you dare try to insinuate that I don’t do my duty to the people of the Alliance.”
He knew that wasn’t what Dimitri meant. Dimitri wasn’t the type of person to stand there and question someone’s ability to lead. While he may not agree with every decision Claude has made, he wasn’t going to put himself above Claude as a ruler. Even if Claude was the one to say that Dimitri was a far better king than he’d ever be, Dimitri wouldn’t outwardly agree with that statement. That wasn’t like him. He cared too much and was far too kind. Too good for Claude and his blood stained hands. No one knew of the sacrifices Claude had to make for the Alliance. No one was there when he killed the general leading the Almyran army into Goneril territory. No one knew of the nightmares and memories that haunted his mind ever since.
Dimitri placed his hands on Claude’s shoulders in an attempt to calm him down and help ground him. It startled him at first, flinching away for a brief moment at the sudden contact, but once he realized what was going on, Claude relaxed into the touch. His outburst suddenly felt embarrassing. He wasn’t one to react so defensively at a mere comment, instead preferring to shrug something off or make a joke of it. Something just snapped when Dimitri mentioned duty.
Claude took a deep breath and attempted his signature grin. “Sorry about that. I guess being here in this void has me a little on edge.”
Dimitri didn’t buy it. “Claude, you are an excellent leader. I did not mean for my words to make you feel anything less than that,” he said softly, his tone nothing short of sincere. “I simply meant that as king of Faerghus, I have a duty to my people that has more of a deep-seated connection to the church. It would not be easy for me to shirk that duty without backlash from Kingdom citizens and nobles alike.”
Claude nodded once at the clarification. He didn’t bother to hold the smile, Dimitri wasn’t falling for it anyway. There was a firmness to Dimitri’s hold on his shoulders that felt so supportive, like Claude could stop holding his own weight and trust Dimitri to keep him standing. He didn’t do that of course, but he did lean into it a bit more than necessary. He was just so exhausted, and it felt nice to know someone had his back, even if just for a moment.
“I’m tired,” Claude admitted.
At those words, Dimitri shifted to let Claude lean against him rather than holding him up against his palms, and slowly lowered them down to sit on the dirt. It was much more comfortable and way more intimate than Claude expected from the king, but he was too worn down to properly enjoy being so close. He hated showing weakness. The Alliance was already so divided. He had to fight to get the roundtable set up to support him, and even then his influence over them was fragile. The moment Lorenz sensed he didn’t have everything completely under control, he knew the new Count Gloucester would swoop in and turn the tides to favor his own will. Dimitri wasn’t like that though. He could see Claude was struggling, and instead of figuring out a way to take advantage of the situation, he offered him a shoulder to lean on.
“You don’t have to save all of Fodlan on your own,” Dimitri said. He wrapped an arm around Claude’s shoulders and squeezed gently, as if to remind him that he was still there. As if Claude could forget with his warm breath tickling his neck.
Those words though brought a small twitch to the corners of Claude’s lips. “Says the person desperate to save everyone on his own.”
“Claude, I’m serious. This war has taken a lot out of everyone. You can have your dreams of dismantling an oppressive system, but you need to slow down. It doesn’t have to happen all at once,” Dimitri said.
“I know, but the sooner I succeed, the sooner I can finally rest,” Claude sighed. “I’ve stained my hands to get this far. I can’t stop now.”
“We all have blood on our hands,” Dimitri said.
“I did my duty as Duke Riegan of the Leicester Alliance, but gods I wish he didn’t force me to,” Claude muttered. He didn’t really intend for that statement to reach Dimitri’s ears, he just wanted to complain out loud to himself, but there was limited space in the void, and he was too comfortable to walk away from the king’s embrace. Besides, when would he get another moment like this?
“Who forced your hand?” Dimitri asked.
“I… I killed prince Shahid of Almyra during the last Almyran invasion on Alliance soil,” Claude admitted. “I… Let’s just say I knew him. And it shouldn’t have escalated to the point where he needed to die, but he refused to yield, and I swore to protect the people of the Alliance. No one was around so he could have fled. I wanted him to flee, but he wouldn’t. I knew he’d never surrender, so I-” He stopped, his voice catching in his throat. “What kind of a leader would I be if I let a constant threat to our land live?”
From Dimitri’s perspective, Claude knew he must have sounded crazy. Even though he said he knew Shahid, it didn’t make sense for him to be so worked up over the prince’s death. Dimitri didn’t press for details though. He took what Claude was willing to admit and rubbed the Duke’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.
“Back when we were still students at the Officers Academy, I was forced to kill my uncle Rufus in order to obtain the throne,” Dimitri said slowly, as if he were still processing that moment. Claude couldn’t blame him. He still wouldn't admit to killing his brother out loud. Just some foreign prince he sort of knew. That was easier.
“Well, perhaps forced is too strong of a word,” Dimitri continued. “I could have ordered someone else to do it, but I felt like if I wasn’t the one who swung the blade then I was failing my duty to the people of Faerghus. I needed to show them that I was strong and capable of doing what it took to protect them, even if that meant getting my own family member’s blood on my hands.”
“How long did it take for you to get over it?” Claude asked. He feared he knew the answer, but there was still a spark of hope that there would be some obtainable end to the pain he felt.
“I am still haunted by that day,” Dimitri admitted quietly. “One should not speak ill of the dead, but I curse my uncle at times for forcing my hand. I can only wonder what my life would have ended up like if he had not tried to overthrow House Fraldarius that day.”
“I imagine everything would be quite different,” Claude said. “We might’ve even graduated if everything hadn’t fallen apart so quickly back then.”
“We missed out on so much, all because a few people decided they wanted a little more power,” Dimitri muttered.
Rufus attacking House Flardarious, Edelgard overthrowing her uncle, and Shahid invading the Alliance. If they never happened… Well, that was something Claude often dreamed about. The mock battles, the feasts, the ball- all things that they were promised when they were younger that they never got to experience. Would the war even be happening right now if they all had the privilege of going to school together that year?
“Why are you here, Claude?” Dimitri asked out of the blue.
“Same reason you are. That demon inside of your mercenary buddy sucked us into this void after trying to kill that other mercenary-”
“No, I don’t mean our current location,” Dimitri said, cutting him off. “I mean, why are you here fighting alongside the Kingdom? By the sound of it, your ambitions would’ve been met much easier had you chosen to align yourself with Edelgard.”
“Perhaps you’re right,” Claude hummed. “Since we could die here anyway I don’t see any reason to lie. Not that I’d ever lie to you, Your Majesty.”
“Don’t say things like that,” Dimitri said.
“What, that I wouldn’t lie to you?” Claude asked.
“That we’re going to die here,” Dimitri corrected. “You’re an optimistic person. Even in the grimmest of situations you always strike me as someone who is unbothered because they have an ace or two up their sleeve. I admire that trait in you. Please don’t lose it here.”
Claude didn’t know how to react to that, hearing that there were parts of him that Dimitri admired, so instead he focused on the king’s original question. “Siding with Edelgard crossed my mind more than once actually. I thought everything through down to the last detail and in the end, if I was dedicated solely to my ambitions, I would have joined forces with her. I could’ve done away with the roundtable and crowned myself king, rebranding the Alliance into a Federation, and helped her fight through the Kingdom to get to Rhea. We both desire the downfall of the Central Church, and together we likely would’ve ended the war by now.”
“So why didn’t you?” Dimitri asked. “I get the feeling it goes beyond some resentment regarding her attacks on the Alliance.”
“Honestly, those attacks barely played into my considerations. I’m not the type to hold a grudge like that,” Claude shrugged. “No, my decision to side with the Kingdom was based purely on my own selfish desires.”
“Care to elaborate?” Dimitri pressed.
Like he said before, there was no point in lying. Even if he wouldn’t speak of his concerns out loud anymore out of fear of concerning Dimitri, he didn’t want to potentially die without getting his feelings off of his chest. “I wanted to get closer to you, Your Majesty,” Claude admitted. “We may not have spent much time together back at the Officers Academy, but you made quite the impression back then.”
“Oh really?” Dimitri asked. There was a weird pitch in his tone, as if he didn’t expect himself to be the reason Claude put his ambitions on hold.
“I’ll admit, I had a small crush on you back then,” Claude said, trying his best to play it off as nonchalant as possible.
“A crush?” Dimitri questioned, his face flushed in embarrassment. “You tossed aside your ambitions and sided with the Kingdom over a mere crush?”
“As hilarious as that would be, no, I did not follow you into this war over a crush,” Claude corrected, doing his best not to laugh at the king’s reaction. “When the academy shut down and we all went our separate ways, I kept tabs on everything, yourself included. The crush was just that, a crush, but watching you grow as a king… I respect you, Your Majesty. Even though we may disagree on certain things, you are the type of leader I strive to be, yet know I will never actually be in practice. You care so much about every person in your army to the point where I am convinced you would trade your life for a foot soldier. You’re so honest in the way you rule, and with the intensity that you care.
“When I was faced with the decision of who to side with in this war, I knew at the end of the day you were the person I could trust the most. I had a crush on you, Your Majesty, but now I have unyielding respect and admiration for you,” Claude admitted, the words flowing out of him effortlessly. He didn’t prepare any of that, Dimitri was just that easy of a person to compliment.
“Claude, I… I don’t know what to say,” Dimitri said softly. He was very obviously overwhelmed by Claude’s sudden gushing. It was cute.
“You could admit that you had a crush on me too and we could laugh it off or kiss over it,” Claude teased, feeling much bolder than before. “Or you don’t have to say anything at all. You asked a question, I answered it. That could be the end of things if you wish.” There were still limitations to his boldness.
Dimitri paused, glancing around the void in which they were trapped. Shez appeared to be deep in conversation with Edelgard off to the side, neither of them paying any mind to the other two nobles sitting a stone’s throw away. Realizing they were as alone as they would probably ever be, Dimitri leaned in, gently pressing his lips to Claude’s as his hand cupped the Duke’s cheek with such care that Claude couldn’t help but melt into the touch immediately. Claude parted his lips to deepen the kiss and moved in closer, not at all caring if it made him look too eager. While he dreamed of this moment, he never thought he’d actually experience holding Dimitri close enough to basically straddle him, their lips interlocked in a passionate kiss.
Dimitri pulled away too quickly. He wasn’t rude in the movement, just cautious. There was a fear in his eyes that he had crossed a line, as if Claude wasn’t the one who poured his heart out and eagerly leaned into the kiss.
“I will not lie to you, my feelings for you were not the same when we met,” Dimitri said awkwardly, letting his hand fall away from Claude’s face. “I thought you were attractive, but unfortunately I did not spend enough time with you to develop an opinion beyond that.”
“Why’d you kiss me then?” Claude asked.
He was convinced Dimitri’s face couldn’t get any more red. “After watching you interact with others over those few weeks we had together at the academy, I came to the conclusion that you would be an easy person to fall for. You’re charismatic despite being guarded, and while people may claim to not trust you, you seem to excel in getting people to follow you. My thoughts of you were that you're attractive, but also dangerous. Our time together was short, but in that time I kept my distance out of fear that I would develop more concrete feelings for you. Feelings that, as a future King, I should not have.”
“I scared you, huh?” Claude asked, his mind still reeling over the fact that Dimitri had actually kissed him, and that he was still seated in his lap.
“You terrified me,” Dimitri chuckled. “But then life got in the way and I had pressing matters to attend to and suddenly I didn’t have the time to consider crushes or potential feelings. When I heard you had become the new reigning Duke Riegan, I remember feeling excited yet also dreading the day I would have to meet you again.”
“My offer to reach out must have had you shaking in your boots,” Claude teased.
“I think you are giving yourself too much credit there. You may have terrified a younger me back during our school days, but I am a King now. I do not scare easily,” Dimitri said, smiling at the challenge.
“You just said you dreaded meeting me again,” Claude pointed out.
“I simply meant I wasn’t sure how much you changed,” Dimitri clarified. “I also referred to you as dangerous. As a King fighting desperately to hold onto his crown, I must maintain a certain level of caution when dealing with unknown variables.”
“So do you go around making out with all people you deem dangerous, or am I just special?” Claude smirked. Dimitri rolled his eyes, but his smile did not falter. Claude shifted to lean against Dimitri’s chest again, feeling much more secure in the position now. “You said you couldn’t have feelings for me as a king, but here we are. What do we do now?”
“I think for now, we promise to have each other’s backs while here, and until the end of the war,” Dimitri said slowly, piecing it together as he went.
“And after the war?” Claude asked.
“After the war… Tell me about your ambitions again, and I’ll see what I can do,” Dimitri said.
“Just so we’re clear, I didn’t admit to having feelings just to trick you into helping me overthrow the Central Church,” Claude pointed out.
“Oh trust me, I’m well aware,” Dimitri chuckled. “But it did help.”
“It’s a date then,” Claude smiled.
Dimitri placed a gentle kiss on the top of Claude’s head. “It’s a date.”
The darkness in the void seemed to spread for miles on end, sucking them into a near hopeless situation. At first, Claude wasn’t convinced they would actually find a way out and they’d be left to die on the floating rock Shez’s mind-demon stranded them on, but now there was this new spark in Claude. They would make it out one way or another. After all, he had a date to attend, and it would be rude to keep Dimitri waiting after so long.