Chapter Text
2 years ago
”Rin, have you grown accustomed to life in the village? No one is bullying you or anything? Did you make a kimono out of the cloth I gave you the other day? When you are troubled, or anxious, or sad or any time. Feel free to call on me. I will come to you immediately. Even if we are far apart. If you call my name, I will absolutely come flying to you. If you can not speak, you can whistle, whistle with you hands, if you like. Distance is no object, our hearts are tied together. With the power of trust, there is nothing to fear. Simply having this feeling should be enough to fill your heart. That is why it is fine for things to remain as they are for now.”
He had spoken to her standing impossibly tall, staring at the scenery before him, whilst she unblinkingly gazed up at his side profile. Around Rin all was silent but for the sound of his voice which resonated throughout her body. Her heart was beating so fast it threatened to beat right out her chest. When he had finished speaking he had turned to her and looked at her with an intensity that took her breath away. He must have seen the stunned look on her face, because his eyes softened as he said “We have plenty of time. You can examine your heart at your own pace. Until then take care of yourself.”
Rin had found herself nodding and he had taken that as confirmation that she’d heard him. He’d then nodded at her once and soared off in to the sky. Rin had stood there looking up onto the sky too stunned to think or say anything. After what felt like an eternity, she brought her hand to her chest in a attempt to calm her racing heart. “Lord Sesshomaru” she exhaled, with tears streaming down her face.
Present
“ahhh”
Rin flopped on to her back, arms and legs spread out and sighed dramatically, as she was prone to do from childhood. It was mid-spring and the meadow she was lying on was awash with the most vibrant colors. This was her favourite spot and she would often sneak away from the village and come here to her not so secret hide out and get lost in thought or to simply lose herself in it’s scenic beauty. The former was her mission for the day.
Rin involuntarily creased her brows deep in thought. Had she imagined it or had her Lord actually proposed to her all those many moons ago? After said proposal his visits became even more infrequent. When he did visit he never mentioned the proposal and they followed their normal routine. He would come bearing some gift, usually an expensive cloth and they would take walks, either in one of her loved meadows or the forest. They would idly walk side by side, more accurately he would walk while she half walked and half skipped, as she animatedly filled him in on her life at the village.
He indulged her whims, if she stopped to pick a flower he would silently and patiently wait for her until she skipped right back to him and resumed walking. He never told her about what he and Jaken did when they were away and for reasons she didn’t really like to think about, she never asked. He would answer most of her questions when she tried to engage him in conversation. Jaken would often accompany her lord when he came to see her. Her relationship with Jaken was strange to say the least, she missed him dearly and is always pleased to see him but that feeling never lasted too long, his tough love act always got on her nerves. Rin frowned at the thought, but just then a passing butterfly momentarily caught her attention. She debated trying to catch it but thought better of it, she had more pressing matters to attend to.
Two years had passed since that day and Rin was nearing her 19th birthday and she had yet to make a choice, to stay in the village or go with her Lord? When she had been younger the choice had been clear to her, she would follow Lord Sesshomaru to the end of the earth or the underworld as he had done for her. The decision was a little less clear to her now. Firstly she enjoyed her life at the village. When she had first moved to the village, she had been devastated and felt betrayed by her Lord and Jaken. She cried herself to sleep many nights and even attempted a hunger strike.Though, grandma Kaede and Lady Sango explained to her that Lord Sesshomaru had left her there for her own good and that he wanted her to be happy, it wasn’t until a month later when her Lord had come to see her that she realized that he hadn’t abandoned her and that he hadn’t forgotten her either.
When she saw him she had screamed his name and run to cling on to his leg, wetting his hakana with her tears, as she repeatedly and disbelievingly mumbled that he had come for her. Jaken had of course loudly exclaimed how thin she looked and when she looked up at her Lords face she could make out a hint of displeasure on his usually impassive face as he inspected her. “Rin” he had said in question and she had shamefully lowered her head afraid to tell him that not only did she do this to herself but she had done it because she hadn’t trusted his word. She eventually told him, because she didn’t want to get grandma Kaede and Lord Inuyasha in trouble. As Jaken was already blaming them and promising that they would feel the wrath of his lord. She had given the excuse that she had been so sad at his leaving her that she hadn’t been able to eat well. Jaken had scolded her of course, reminding her of how ungrateful she was to be wasting the life his gracious lord had given her. She had stopped all of brooding and antics from then on, not wanting to displease him and risk the possibility of him ceasing to visit her. Rin didn’t really like to think about that time, even now she could feel a peg of sadness just thinking about it.
After that, she eagerly embraced her life in the village, she helped grandma Kaede, made friends, played tricks on Inuyasha with Shippo, sparred with Kohaku and babysat with Lady Sango’s children. Life in the village became even more enjoyable when Lady Kagome returned from her homeland. Rin loved spending time with Lady Kagome because she often told her tales of her homeland. She was the best storyteller! Rin knew everyone thought she was a daydreamer but her imagination couldn’t make up half of what existed in Lady Kagome’s tales. She had a good life here and part of her was reluctant to give it up. She felt a smile creep onto her face just thinking about all her friends and new found family. Her next thought swiped that smile right off her face though.
The nature of her relationship with Lord Sesshomaru troubled her and made her anxious about leaving the village. She really didn’t understand it at all. At this thought Rin wondered if she was just too naive to understand these kind of things. If he had indeed proposed to her why then did he act like it didn’t happen? “Is it some kind of mind game adults played?” she wondered to herself. Her own feeling towards the lord were one she was yet to understand as well. She knew she cared for him deeply and that he was the most important person in her life but she didn’t know if she loved him as a women loved a man? She sighed heavily at this thought, rolling onto her side propping her head on her hand.
She decided to make a checklist of how he made her feel. She taught he was the most beautiful demon on the planet. She was quite certain it was a fact. At this she nodded her head in agreement with herself. She didn’t know when but childish anticipation for his visits had turned into something akin to agony. She would occasionally pause at whatever task she was doing and glance up the the sky in search for him. Rin was certain that’s how she got her reputation as a day dreamer. Her heart had started to beat at an irregular pace in his presence. Was that love? She wondered. Rin closed her eyes, all this thinking was causing her head to ache. She sat up and messaged her temples whilst wincing.
When she open her eyes she immediately became aware of her surrounding and that the once vibrate colors around her were all now starting to glow as the sun was setting. As much as she would have loved to sit and enjoy the view, she knew that she had to get back to the village. Grandma Kaede was probably starting to worry about her. Rin got up and dusted herself off, she told herself that she didn’t have to find the answers today. “We have plenty of time” he had told her. She had to trust in him. As she walked down towards the village Rin could see Kohaku coming to get her, probably sent by grandma Kaede to fetch her.