Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I’ve been wondering something,” he said.

“Yeah?”

“Do you like anyone?”

Your stomach flipped but you didn’t want to get ahead of yourself. “I like most people fine. You’re not too bad.”

He rested his cheek on his hand, looking at you with that knowing half-smile that sometimes stole your breath. “You know what I mean. Do you like anyone?”

“No,” you lied. “Do you?”

His smile grew. Your chest ached at the sight of it. “Maybe. But I’m second-guessing myself a little bit.”

“Who is it? Is it someone I know?”

He didn’t answer. He studied you closely, as though trying to gauge something. The fading light sugared his hair and the line of his jaw. His eyes glimmered in the way that always made it seem like he was privy to all of your secrets.

“You know them very well, actually.” His voice was low and for a split second, his eyes went to your mouth.

All of the wry remarks flew from your head. Whatever this was, you didn’t want to ruin it. You felt like if you so much as breathed, this would all disappear, like the blurry, barely-there edges of a dream.

He drew close, his lips hovering by your ear. What he said made you lightheaded. You closed your eyes to hold the words in your mind for a moment before opening them again.

“Are you sure?”

He ducked his head, smiling at the ground. “How could I not be—”

You woke up with a start. Your arm had fallen asleep from where you’d been lying on it. You rubbed a hand over your face and took a minute to reorient yourself. 

Window. Desk. A notebook hanging precariously over the edge. You were still at school. You must have dozed off during class. Someone was calling your name and prodding at your shoulder.

“Sorry, what?”

“Didn’t you get any sleep last night? You look exhausted.”

You couldn’t quite bring yourself to smile at Honey. “I’m fine. You know how math is. I just dozed off.”

“That would be the third time this week,” Honey said, a frown stealing across his face. “Are you sure you’re alright? You never sleep in class.”

You swept your notebook into your bag and stood, stretching your arms over your head. “You just never caught me doing it before.”

Honey didn’t look like he believed you. “You can always take some time off if you’re not feeling well,” he said. “Taka-chan and I can always bring you notes to catch up on.”

“I”m fine,” you assured him. “Just had a late night.”

Thankfully, Mori appeared before Honey could press the point. He passed over a carton of strawberry milk to Money and a chilled bottle of iced tea for you. 

“Sleep well?” he asked dryly.

“Like a baby.” There was an awkward beat as Mori and Honey both looked at you expectantly. “Uh, thanks for waiting for me. I’m going to head home. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The boys continued to stare at you. Your neck prickled. What did they want? Your head was still fuzzy from your nap; you couldn’t remember whether or not you’d promised them anything.

“You said you would go to the Host Club with us after school,” Honey reminded you gently. Mori grunted in agreement.

You waved it off. “Maybe some other time. I’m kind of busy.”

Honey widened his eyes. “With what?”

“You know …” you scratched under the collar of your uniform. “I have volleyball practice later.”

“You quit volleyball,” Mori said matter-of-factly. 

“And it’s not even volleyball season,” Honey added. “Since the break, you’ve only been to the academy and back to your house.”

Damn. Caught. You looked between Mori and Honey, not sure what to say.

“We’re worried about you,” Honey said. As always, his honest concern made your chest tighten guiltily. “You haven’t been yourself since after break. If something’s wrong, you can tell us. Taka-chan and I will help however we can. We promise.”

“I’m fine,” you said. “Nothing’s wrong.”

Honey’s eyes softened. “You’re usually pretty good at hiding it, but this time I can tell that you’re lying.”

Something ugly rose in your chest. You couldn’t take this for much longer or you would say something stupid. Honey had always been too good at reading people.

You said hurriedly, “Fine. I’ll go with you to your Hosting Club or whatever. But just for today, though.”

Honey brightened and the shadow of a smile crossed Mori’s face. Eagerly, Honey grabbed your arm and dragged from the classroom and up to the second floor of the academy, down some hallway you hardly recognized.

To be honest, you knew next to nothing about what Honey and Mori did in their notorious Host Club. They could have been practicing the occult and you wouldn’t know about it. All you knew was that the females of Ouran’s student body went positively feral at any mention of the club. You wondered if you weren’t screwing yourself over by going into this blind. 

“You’ll love everyone,” Honey was saying to you. “They’ll be just the thing you need. The twins will cheer you up in no time, and Haruhi’s always nice. Tamaki might go a little overboard but he always means well! And even if Kyoya seems cold, he pays the most attention out of everyone!”

“What exactly does the club do?” you asked, stumbling along after Honey.

“You’ll have to wait and see!”

Honey stopped before a set of double doors, Mori right behind you. You glanced up at the room’s sign, reading Music Room 3. Music? Honey and Mori had never mentioned anything about that. Just as you were about to ask, Honey pushed the doors open and a swirl of rose petals drifted towards you as though by magic. For a second, you could only stand there, equal parts horrified and amazed.

The room was tastefully decorated in shades of pink and cream. There was music tinkling from somewhere, and the large windows at the back suffused the space in cheery light. Small delectables perched on side tables and chairs, plucked off their platters by various students with dreamy smiles on their faces. Every now and then, a peal of laughter would ring out or an awed exclamation. Everyone was flushed and enthralled, surrounded by sumptuous furniture and decorations. Ouran was already ostentatious at the best of times; somehow this room managed to outdo even that. The fairy tale-like quality of the practice room seemed a world away from the academy despite being in the same building.

It was too much. You took a small step back, bumping into Mori.

“What is this?” you whispered.

“Honey, Mori, you’re late,” someone said curtly from inside. A student popped his head out to appraise you all, his dark hair neatly styled and glasses glinting. He pointedly flipped through a few pages of his clipboard. 

“Honey, Amara is waiting for you near the piano. Mori, you have an appointment in less than two minutes.”

Honey seemed unbothered by the student’s briskness. “Sure thing, Kyoya.” He briefly introduced you and you waved awkwardly. “Kyo-chan, this is their first time here. Would you mind showing them around? They’re a good friend, so you better be careful with them!”

“Kyo-chan” pushed up his glasses. “I’m always careful with guests.”

Honey squeezed your arm. “You’re in good hands. Taka-chan and I will catch up with you later!” With that, the two boys disappeared inside, Honey narrowly missing a table laden with chocolates before Mori steered him away.

“My name is Ootori Kyoya. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Follow me, please.” The dark-haired boy led you to a table and a pair of chairs off to the side. You had the distinct sense of being in a medical consultation and you didn’t like it. 

Kyoya pulled out a chair for you before taking the opposite one and setting his clipboard in front of him. “Would you like anything to eat? Drink? We have newly imported chocolates from Belgium if you care to try them.”

“No, thanks.”

“Since this is your first time, allow me to ask you a few questions so we can get to know you better. The positive experience of our guests is our utmost priority.” With that, Kyoya took out a sleek notebook from his inside blazer pocket and a pen.

You straightened in your seat despite yourself. You felt suddenly sloppy next to Kyoya’s immaculate uniform. You’d left your blazer in your chauffeur’s car this morning and felt naked in only your collared shirt.

“What would you say your type is?”

“My type?”

“Are you more interested in introverted or extroverted types? Do you prefer the wild type? Or the more elegant? Perhaps you’re interested in royal-like qualities?”

You frowned. “I don’t follow.”

“I have the profiles of all of the hosts available for your perusal, including my own. Guests tend to have an easier time when everyone is laid out.” Kyoya reached behind him for a stack of folders.

“I don’t understand. What does the Host Club do, exactly?” you asked.

Kyoya blinked at you. “You don’t know?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Well, then.” Kyoya straightened and folded his hands in front of him. “If you want the technical, brochure definition, the Host Club is committed to providing engaging, considerate companionship to all students at Ouran Academy. We frequently host events that foster a sense of camaraderie and cooperation. We strive to be kind and courteous, to treat all students with respect, and to act as paragons of manner and class.” 

You stared at Kyoya and he shrugged. “If you want the more literal definition, this is simply a club for students with too much time on their hands to entertain other students who also have too much time on their hands.”

You looked around at the giggling students. Floating around them were six—no—seven sharply-dressed students that must have been the hosts. Even from a distance, their charm shimmered in the air like a physical aura around them. They went around looking up from beneath their eyelashes and brushing their lips over knuckles and flicking hair out of their eyes. You struggled to figure out why the hell they were doing all of that until you realized.

You burst out laughing. “Oh, so you mean you entertain people who are lonely and single.” 

Kyoya prickled. “If you prefer to define it like that,” he said coolly.

“Sorry, I don’t mean to offend you. To each their own.” And to think that this was what Mori and Honey got up to every day after school. No wonder they hadn’t told you. You didn’t see they could’ve explained this debacle of a club without sounding crazy.

“So when you were talking about ‘type’, you meant type of host?” You were trying not to crack up again. This was ridiculous. How had the academy even approved of this club? It was impressive that Kyoya was taking this all so seriously.

“You would be correct.”

You put up your hands. Briefly, a mental image of him flickered into your head but you quashed it like a cockroach. “I couldn’t tell you.”

Kyoya readjusted his glasses, crossing something out in his notebook. “That’s not a problem. If you have the time, we have one-on-one consultations available.” You snickered but Kyoya didn’t look up. “What is your main reason for visiting the Host Club today?”

“Besides being forced by two of your hosts?”

Kyoya smiled but it seemed more out of politeness than anything else. “Yes, besides that.” He waited expectantly. You couldn’t take this. You would’ve bolted already if you weren’t afraid of Honey roundhouse kicking you back into this music room.

You were tempted to offer up some lame excuse about cute guys and being on your lonesome, but that wasn’t big enough. Kyoya was acting like you were about to go in for open-heart surgery; you might as well give him some bold, grand reason to warrant all of this seriousness.

Your thoughts went to him again. He would’ve gotten a kick out of this. He always loved pomp and pageantry and this club seemed to thrive on it. If he were here, he would’ve said something like—

“Do you have anything for a broken heart?”

It didn’t come out the way you wanted it to. It was supposed to sound ironic and mocking. Instead, your voice faltered. It almost sounded pathetic, actually.

Kyoya looked like you’d taken him off guard. Good, only the last thing you wanted was for him to feel sorry for you. He frowned, glancing down at his tablet. A strange flush rose in his cheeks.

“Well, I-I suppose—”

A voice rang across the room in perfect clarity. 

“Did someone say a broken heart?”

You and Kyoya both turned. Some guy was standing on one of the tables in the middle of the room. Your eyebrows drew together as the light in the room seemed to dim until only he was illuminated, shining softly on his golden hair and sweetly pitiful expression. He closed his eyes briefly, as though overcome by his emotions.

“Truly one of the most despairing tragedies a human can endure,” he lamented. “That nature gave us such a strong emotion only for us to be crippled by its absence.”

The girls in the room sighed in unison, murmuring in agreement. You thought you saw someone near the back roll their eyes.

“I have heard your entreaty, oh, kindred soul,” the guy continued. With a sinking feeling, you realized he was addressing you. “If a broken heart is what you suffer from, may I be the nepenthe that soothes your wild grief. I was put on this earth to serve, and serve I shall.”

He descended from the table like a fallen angel, his violet eyes shining. With a graceful motion of his hand, he said, “Leave us. This is a matter I must attend to myself.”

You scoffed quietly. Who was this cuckoo? No one was going to leave—

The music room emptied in a matter of seconds. The light also returned to normal, leaving only you and the other hosts, and platters of half-finished sweets. You didn’t know whether to be impressed or horrified.

“And so it begins,” Kyoya murmured.

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

All at once, the seven other hosts swarmed around your chair. 

“You have a broken heart?” Honey asked. “Is that why you’ve been so off? You should have told us! I’ve been such a terrible friend. I had no idea.” His bottom lip trembled and his eyes grew misty.

“I was just kidding,” you said before Honey could start crying. “My heart is perfectly intact.”

“You’re lying,” Honey whimpered. “Now you’re just trying to hide it.”

“I’m not, I’m telling you—”

Honey turned his face into Mori’s pant leg and you instantly felt like a jerk as quiet sobs escaped him. Maybe your heart wasn’t exactly intact, but this was exactly why you’d been trying to brush it off. You couldn’t watch Honey cry without feeling your own eyes start to tear up.

Mori stooped to rub circles into Honey’s back. He looked at you pointedly. You should have told us.

“I didn’t want to make it a big deal,” you said, cringing. 

“But it is a considerable deal,” the blonde host said. He took your hand suddenly, pressing it to his chest. “I can’t even begin to imagine how heavy the burden you carry is. See how your head bows and your eyes shine with unshed tears! You poor, wretched thing!” Blondie heaved an enormous sigh and looked at you with a trembling smile. “Might I know the name of the heart I am meant to restore?”

You pulled your hand away from him. To say that his flowery descriptions of your supposed misery rankled you would be an understatement. “I think I’ve had enough of this. I’m leaving.”

“But you can’t!” Blondie gasped. “I could not, in good conscience, allow a suffering soul to leave this room unassuaged! Please, there must be something we can do for you!”

“I don’t even know who you are,” you snapped. You looked around at everyone staring at you. “I don’t know who any of you are.”

“They don’t know who we are!” Honey wailed, his face still pressed against Mori.

You bit back a groan. “I didn’t mean you and Mori.”

“Tamaki, would you lay off of it?” a different host said. They were slight and brown-haired, and you recognized them as the person who had rolled their eyes. “You’re coming on a little strong, even for you.”

“Of course. You’re right, Haruhi,” Blondie said. He smoothed down his blazer and faced you directly. “Allow me to take a step back and introduce myself properly. My name is Suoh Tamaki, President of the Host Club.” He bowed and you resisted the urge to roll your eyes. “The gentleman you’ve been talking to is Ootori Kyoya, the Vice President.” 

You couldn’t help side-eyeing Kyoya. If it weren’t for him and his dumb questions, you wouldn’t be in this situation to begin with. He pretended not to notice.

Tamaki pinched the brown-haired host’s cheek. “This little darling is Fujioka Haruhi.” Then he gestured at the two hosts who had been hovering behind you the entire time. You turned, surprised to find that they were twins. “The one on your left is Hitachiin Kaoru and the one on your right is Hitachiin Hikaru.”

The twins stared at you blandly, their expressions inscrutable. 

“He’s Hikaru, actually,” the one on the right said, pointing to the left.

“And he’s Kaoru,” the one on the left said, pointing to the right.

You looked between them a few times, trying to find some marker to tell the two apart. You only succeeded in confusing yourself and forgetting who was who.

“So you have a broken heart, huh?” the twin on the right asked. You decided that he would be Hikaru until further notice.

“Takes balls to admit something like that,” the other twin, Kaoru, said.

“Who could possibly have done that to you?”

“Unless it was you who did the heart breaking.”

“You seem like the type.”

“Wouldn’t be surprised.”

“What did you do? Cheat?”

“Blackmail?”

“Extort?”

“Enough!” Tamaki said, pushing between the twins. “There will be no slander of the broken-hearted sufferer. It’s terribly cruel.” He looked up at you from beneath his lashes. “But if it weighs heavily on you, you could always share with us how your heart became broken. We are very good listeners at the Host Club. It’s the first step of the healing process.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Like I would share something like that with a bunch of strangers.”

Tamaki’s face fell. He crossed over to the corner of the room and sulked.

Honey sniffled. “You don’t trust us? You used to tell me and Taka-chan everything.”

You opened your mouth, then closed it. You had used to be quite the chatterbox between the three of you, but this was different. It was still too raw and vulnerable to share with anyone. It was why you were avoiding looking at it head-on. It was easier to pretend it didn’t exist than poke at it and risk it bleeding.

Nothing had happened over the break, you told yourself. It had been dull and uneventful and you were exactly the same as before you’d left.

Nothing had happened at all.

“I don’t see why you’re pushing them so much,” Haruhi said. “It’s obviously a private topic and none of our business. We should just leave it alone.”

Finally. Someone who made some sense. You shot Haruhi a grateful look, who only shrugged in response.

“I suppose Haruhi has a point. Break-ups tend to be very touchy topics,” Kyoya said matter-of-factly.

Your hackles raised. “Who said it was a breakup?”

“Was it?”

You were about to vehemently deny it, but Honey’s wide-eyed stare made you think twice. You decided not to answer.

“A breakup,” Kaoru breathed.

“How terrible,” Hikaru whispered.

“Who do you think dumped who?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

You glared at them. “Apologies,” the twins said together, not sounding sorry in the slightest. You were very quickly starting to dislike them.

“I believe it’s a matter of trust,” Kyoya said. “Something like this can’t be shared with just anyone.”

“Or maybe they just don’t want to share,” Haruhi muttered.

You felt Honey tug on your arm. You bent at the waist so he could whisper something to you.

“Please don’t be mad. I know you don’t really like it, but I hate it when you’re unhappy. Me and Taka-chan want to help you. And the other hosts want to help too. Can you at least give them a chance?”

“My heart isn’t broken, though,” you said. “There’s nothing to help.”
Honey frowned. “You won’t get anything out of lying to yourself. It’s only going to build up until you can’t take it anymore.”

It wasn’t like you believed seven people with too much time on their hands would possibly be able to help you, but for Honey at least, you would play along. 

You straightened and looked around at all of the hosts. Then you looked up to the ceiling and prayed for strength. “Alright. I’m willing to give you all a chance. But the minute things get weird, I’m out of here.”

“So you trust us to heal your broken heart?” Kaoru asked.

“Sure.”

The twins glanced at each other, exchanging quicksilver grins that only put you more on edge.

Kyoya pushed up his glasses. “We’ll have to build that trust before anything. As with any of our other guests, a degree of familiarity should be established. Because you’re unsure of your type at the moment, you may begin your trial appointments tomorrow to gauge who is best suited for you.”

“Right …” You were already starting to regret agreeing to this.

“You’ll want to have me, of course.” Tamaki smoothly slipped an arm around your shoulders without warning. He must have finished sulking at some point. “You’ll find there’s little I can’t do,” he said, winking.

You shrugged off his arm. “We’ll see about that. So do I get some kind of warranty? You all seem so confident that you’ll be able to ‘restore my broken heart.’ Will I get something if you can’t?”

“You won’t have to go to the Host Club all of the time,” Haruhi offered wryly.

“I think some terms are in order!”

You couldn’t even begin to explain how a hole suddenly appeared in the floor, or how a platform started rising from it. A girl sat languidly on it, smiling at you with gleaming eyes. A huge bow was tied into her dark blonde hair.

“Who’s that?”

“Our manager?” Haruhi said, but it ended in a question.

The girl leapt off before the platform had stopped and made her way over to you. She tilted her head, considering you, then yanked you forward and smelled the air around you deeply.

“What the hell?”

“Your misery exudes a scent like wilted flowers,” she said, like that made any sense. “Your heart is more broken than you realize.”

Taking that as an invitation, the rest of the hosts—save Haruhi—started sniffing you too.

“Oh yeah, you positively reek of despair,” Hikaru said.

“The stench of melancholy is overwhelming,” Kaoru agreed.

“Didn’t I tell you your sorrow was unbearable?” Tamaki moaned, hanging on your arm.

“I don’t know how you can possibly bear it,” Kyoya sniffed.

Honey beamed at you. “I think you smell great!” 

Mori grunted in agreement.

“Would you quit that?” You shook all of them off. “What is wrong with all of you?”

Haruhi looked grim. “I ask myself that every day.”

“At any rate,” the lady manager said, propping her hands on her hips. “To raise the stakes of this mission, we must impose a deadline. You can’t go trudging along without anything putting pressure on you.” She pointed a finger in your face. “From this day forth, I declare that the Host Club has two weeks to heal your broken heart.”

“That’s not nearly enough time!” Tamaki cried. “A broken heart is a delicate thing! We can’t rush things!”

“It’ll have to be enough,” the manager said imperiously. “Time does not stop for a broken heart.”

“Then we don’t have a moment to waste!” You yelped as Tamaki started to drag you off. “There must be food and clothes and music and—”

“Tamaki.”

Haruhi hadn’t spoken loudly, but Tamaki immediately stopped in his tracks, turning to look at them. Haruhi pursed their lips together, then sighed.

“I think everyone needs to relax. We’ve already gone way over club time as is. Everyone go home and we’ll meet again tomorrow.”

“But—”

Haruhi cut Tamaki off. “We’ll meet again tomorrow.”

Reluctantly, Tamaki let go of you. You mouthed a thank you to Haruhi, which they returned with a small smile. You realized that if there was anyone you would be able to appeal to in this mad club, it would be Haruhi.

“Two weeks!” the lady manager trilled as everyone left. “Don’t forget!”

You had to take a moment to recollect yourself once you were outside of Ouran. You could barely process everything that just happened. How had you gone from being a tiny bit distracted to an entire brigade intent on fixing you? If that wasn’t escalation at its finest, you didn’t know what was.

“Are you alright?” Honey asked. He bopped your nose with Usa-chan.

“What did you get me into?” you groused. “I thought you and Mori were supposed to be in a normal club.”

“But it is a normal club,” Honey said. You didn’t have the heart to argue with him. You felt like you had lost three decades of your life in that music room. Only people with limitless energy like Honey, an implacable facade like Mori, or mindless adoration like those girls could possibly last in such a club.

“I’m not going to last three days in there,” you whispered mournfully.

“Yes, you will,” Honey said firmly. “It gets better, I promise.”

You looked to Mori for confirmation. His eyes didn’t quite say the same.

You pressed your hands against your eyes. If your heart wasn’t already broken, it would be by the time the Host Club was done with it.

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

You learned your lesson from yesterday and forced yourself to not to doze off during the last math class. The minute the bell chimed, you rushed from your seat and out into the halls, not wanting either Honey or Mori to stop you and drag you off to the forsaken Music Room 3.

You had spent all of last night thinking about it. The two week plan to “heal your broken heart” was stupid and insulting, you decided. You had allowed yourself to be swept along with it yesterday, but with a new day's lens, you were unwilling to waste any more time on those ridiculous hosts than you had already. If anyone was going to help you move on, it was yourself. Like hell were you going to be the Host Club’s charity project.

You had nearly sent him a text about it last night. The Host Club was right up his alley. If he’d gone to Ouran, he might have ended up being a host himself. You could practically imagine his smug expression and the merciless jabs you would have thrown at him. He would have made a better host than any of those phonies in there.

You told yourself there was no harm in imagining. So long as you didn’t actually text him, you could find a bit of fun in what-ifs.

Just as you were thinking this, your stomach dropped to your shoes as you recognized someone’s lean back through the crowd. His dark head rose a good few inches above everyone else, and judging from the way it was swivelling around, Mori was looking for someone. 

You swore internally, quickly spinning on your heel to use the other exit at the other end of the academy. You were lucky Mori’s six-odd feet hadn’t seen you already. If you weren’t quick enough, it was virtually impossible to hide from him.

Literally three feet away from the double doors leading outside, a high-pitched voice nearly made you trip over your own feet. Outside the doors, Honey was looking up imploringly at a pair of girls and asking if they had seen you. You immediately backtracked and ducked into the nearest classroom, intent on waiting there until Honey left. 

The thing about Honey and Mori was that they could be doggedly stubborn when they wanted to be. Between Honey’s puppy-dog affection and Mori’s unyielding stoicism, you really had to work to get through the two of them.

You peered out of the classroom door. Honey was still there, talking to a group of boys now. You wondered if your chances wouldn’t be better just booking it out the door. Honey could kick your ass but could he run faster than you?

Someone’s voice slithered into your ear. “What are you doing?” 

You flinched so hard it hurt. “What the hell are you doing here?” you hissed. You couldn’t tell if it was to Hikaru or Kaoru but if one of them was here, you assumed the other was too.

“We were just staying behind to clean up,” Hikaru/Kaoru said. 

“You’re the one who’s hiding in here like a fugitive,” Kaoru/Hikaru added.

“Go back to whatever you were doing then,” you groused. 

Both of the twins leaned over your shoulder to see what you were peeping at. Like yesterday, you were forced to conclude that Hikaru was on the right and Kaoru was the other one, if only for your own convenience.

“Say, aren’t you supposed to be at the Host Club right now?” Kaoru said.

“Shouldn’t you be?” you retorted. Honey was moving away. You had to move now or you’d never be able to leave.

“You’re supposed to be doing your trial appointments right now,” Hikaru said. “Not slinking around down here.”

“Unless you’re trying to get out of it?” Kaoru suggested innocently.

The twins stepped in front of you, arching their eyebrows. You resisted the urge to sock both of them in the nose.

“If you would get out of the way, I’m going up there right now.”

“That’s exactly what I would say if I was trying to get out of this,” Hikaru said.

Kaoru exchanged a look with his brother. “They must really think we’re stupid if they expect us to fall for that.”

You tried to muscle your way between the two of them. “You’re mind readers now, congratulations. Now let me out of here.”

The twins both placed a surprisingly firm hand on each of your shoulders, pinning you in place.

“We take our work at the Host Club very seriously,” they spoke in eerie unison. “We would never allow a guest to be mistreated in any way.” They leaned in closer to you. Your eyes darted from Hikaru’s face to Kaoru’s, feeling goosebumps rise at the strange expression on both of their faces. Why did it feel like they’d just promised the exact opposite of what they’d just said?

Brilliant smiles broke out on the twins’ faces, so quickly it gave you whiplash. It might have given you butterflies if their hands weren’t still digging into your shoulders.

“Allow us to escort you to the Host Club ourselves,” Hikaru said.

“It would be our pleasure,” Kaoru said.

“No, actually I had to—”

“It’s the least we can do,” the twins said together. They gave you no chance to argue as they frogmarched you from the classroom all the way up to Music Room 3 with insulting ease. You were cursing them with every name you could think of by the time the music room doors swung open and yet another cascade of rose petals descended upon you. 

“Welcome to the Host Club!” the hosts chorused. Tamaki looked like he was going to say something else but the glower you sent him curdled his tongue.

Honey rushed up to you. “You made it! Taka-chan and I were worried that you forgot about your appointment!”

“No,” you gritted out with forced calm. “I didn’t forget.”

“We caught them trying to sneak out of the school,” Hikaru declared.

“Seemed like they were trying to back out of the agreement,” Kaoru added.

You almost screamed. What had you done to these two?

“Aww, you promised you would give us a chance,” Honey said, pouting. He pulled on the hem of your blazer. “You promised!”

“I’m wounded by your lack of faith,” Tamaki said, clasping a hand over his heart. “Are you so afraid of getting hurt again?”

“That and many other things.”

Someone’s ringing voice cut everyone short. “You hosts are losing your touch!” 

The hosts parted down the middle and the lady manager from yesterday strode forward, her aggressively tied bow flowing behind her. “Obviously a broken heart is no easy thing to heal. They are fickle things that require constant, tireless care. If you are not resolute, the heart will never heal. Tell me,” she said, sweeping an arm in front of you. “Does this look like a heart easily cured?”

“No, it doesn’t,” someone murmured, and you felt your eye twitch.

“You’re entirely correct, Renge,” Tamaki said graciously. You stored away her name to curse later. “We’re being too soft on our guest. We must dedicate all of ourselves or nothing at all.” He snapped his fingers at Kyoya. “Kyoya, what’s our first course of action?”

“Trial appointments,” Kyoya answered curtly. “I’ve created a list based on who would be most compatible in order to save time.”

“Wonderful, let’s hear it.”

“Hold on, what do you mean compatible? How could you even determine that?”

Kyoya didn’t have time to hide his tablet before you snatched it out of his hands. To your horror, your full name, age, address, and—inexplicably—your preferences, hobbies and interests were all laid out like video game stats. 

“How did you get all of this?” you asked, horrified.

“You told us.”

“Bullshit. I didn’t even know about you until yesterday.” As you scrolled through your profile, you had to grudgingly admit that everything was accurate. Had Kyoya compiled all of this himself? Even if he’d had help from Honey and Mori, they couldn’t have given him everything.

Kyoya smoothly took back the tablet. “Taking the guest’s preferences into consideration, appointments would go as follows: myself, Honey, and Mori, followed by Haruhi as a last resort.”

Now it was Tamaki’s turn to snatch the tablet. “That can’t be right. I’m not even on the list!”

“Neither are we!” the twins exclaimed.

“Because there is no need for you to be,” said Kyoya with infinite patience. 

“But Honey and Mori already know the guest,” Tamaki whined.

“Which is precisely what makes them more suitable hosts. Honestly, it probably won’t even come to that because I am more than capable of serving the guest myself. And not to mention that you and the twins already have a surplus of guests as it is.”

“They’re fighting over you already,” Renge said gleefully. She pulled you over to one of the couches while the hosts continued bickering.

“What is your aim here?” you asked Renge. “Are you some kind of diabolical mastermind?” Or just a regular old sadist?

Renge flipped her hair over her shoulder. “I consider myself responsible for the financial wellbeing and longevity of the Host Club. Before anything else, this club is a business, and none of the hosts have much of a head for it, not even Kyoya.”

“I don’t see how wasting so much time on one guest is financially viable,” you remarked drily. Now that you were looking around, you noticed that you and the other hosts were the only ones in the music room. Had they cleared their schedules just for you?

“Nothing sells better than tragedy,” replied Renge. “Just think of all the interest the club would garner by showing that not even a shattered heart like yours is impervious to their charm. And not only that, but capable of being healed!” She closed her eyes and sighed. “It makes me wistful just thinking about it.”

“Sure. Except that I’m not the tragic hero you’re looking for. I don’t know how many times I’ve tried to tell you that my heart isn’t broken.”

Renge stared at you. Then she started counting off on her fingers. “You’re falling asleep in class, you drop out of all your extracurriculars, your grades start slipping and your appearance is almost completely different. If that’s not a broken heart, I don’t know what is.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

“ And you’re in denial. The tragic hero never realizes their hamartia until it is too late. Denial is your fatal flaw.”

You scowled at her. Had everyone suddenly become a heart expert overnight?

Renge patted your hand. “It’ll be great for everyone. Trust me. Just look how lively all of the hosts are getting!”

Honey had his hands over his ears and looked like he was holding back tears. Mori was stooped protectively over him, looking murderous. Kaoru and Hikaru looked moments away from pummeling Kyoya, Tamaki was in the corner, and Kyoya’s voice was cracking from how hard he was straining not to yell. Only Haruhi remained apart from everything, flipping through a paperback with their legs slung over an armchair. You watched the debacle for a second, realizing now was your chance to leave.

But he wouldn’t have wanted that. He would’ve played along, at least for a little while.

You got to your feet. “Alright, everyone be quiet and let the guest talk for a second.”

Surprisingly, everyone went quiet immediately. 

“Since this is my trial appointment, I’ll just pick someone and save you all the trouble.”

Kyoya cleared his throat. “Yes, that’s what I was trying to tell everyone. Of course, you’ll want to go with—”

“Haruhi.” You pointed a finger at them. “I want them as my host.”

The protests rose immediately. 

Honey: “But aren’t Taka-chan and I your closest friends? Why don’t you want to go with us?”

Kyoya: “I would strongly advise against this. I did say Haruhi was only a last resort, whereas I should be your first choice.”

Hikaru/Kaoru: “Haruhi? You’ve got two gorgeous twins here and you pick Haruhi?”

Kaoru/Hikaru: “You’re getting two for the price of one, idiot!”

Tamaki: “Surely you’d rather choose me. There’s no one who be more attentive or considerate. I was practically made for healing broken hearts!”

Mori: “...”

You raised an eyebrow, undeterred. “You said your guests were your first priority. I want Haruhi as my host and that’s that.”

No one had anything to say to that. By now, Haruhi had looked up from their book and was blinking at you owlishly.

“Me? Are you sure?”

You leaned down to whisper something in their ear. They had to hide a grin. “Ah, gotcha.”

Renge clapped her hands together. “If that’s settled, we have to move on to the matter of payment.”

You balked. “You mean I have to cough up money for this?”

“Didn’t I tell you this club was a business?”

“No, Renge,” Tamaki said, cutting through the air with his hands. “It wouldn’t be fair to ask for payment on such a delicate matter. This must be carried out with tact and discretion. The guest should be entitled to our services without charge.”

He bowed in your direction as though he was expecting applause. You didn’t give it to him, because if they’d forced you to pay even one yen for any of this, you would’ve already been gone.

“I suppose there’s nothing for it,” Kyoya said. He was scribbling something in his black notebook. “If the guest wants Haruhi as a host, then the rest of us will continue with business as usual.”

“You can always change your mind,” Kaoru said as he passed by you.

“Yeah, we’ll always be here,” Hikaru said.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” you said, meaning the exact opposite.

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

While students began trickling inside the music room to meet with the other hosts, Haruhi found the two of you a table away from the rest of the Host Club’s hubbub to talk. You were grateful for their consideration and told them as much while they expertly poured out two cups of fragrant tea.

“Of course. I can tell you’re not keen on everyone knowing your business.”

You smiled. Then, because you had been wondering about it since yesterday, you asked, “If you don’t mind me asking, what are your pronouns?”

Haruhi blinked. “Oh, feminine pronouns are fine, although I don't really mind either way. I’ve gotten so used to moonlighting as a boy that sometimes it doesn’t even occur to me.”

“I have to know how that happened,” you said. “How did someone like you get lumped into a club like this ? I mean, you’re so—so—”

“Normal?” Haruhi said blandly.

“I was going to say down-to-earth, but yeah, that too.”

Haruhi took a sip from her teacup. She had a natural grace to her movements that she didn’t seem to be aware of. “It’s a long story. But the short of it is that I accidentally broke a vase and had to become a host to pay off the debt.”

“Must have been some vase.”

Haruhi closed her eyes as though it pained her to remember it. “Eight million yen,” she said through gritted teeth.

You sucked in a breath. “That’s obscene.”

“You’re telling me.” Haruhi crossed one leg over the other. “But we’re here to talk about you. Why don’t you tell me a bit about yourself?”

“You mean besides what’s on the file?”

“I never look at those,” Haruhi said dismissively. “They’re an invasion of privacy, and they’re creepy. You’re a person. Not a test subject.”

“I’m so glad I’m spending time with you. You make me feel like my fears are actually warranted.”

“The Host Club means well, but that doesn’t mean they always do well. If you spend more time with them, you’ll find out that they get just as many things wrong as they do right.”

You didn’t miss the note of fondness in Haruhi’s tone. Despite how at odds her sensible nature seemed with the Host Club, she liked the club. Liked the hosts. That had to count for something, didn’t it?

“Alright, I’ll bite. What do you want to know?”

“What’s your family like? If you’re like everyone else at Ouran, you must come from money.”

“My parents are art investors,” you said. “They like to sponsor local talent and act as patrons for artists they like. They’re also interested in purchasing and restoring antique pieces. Don’t—” you added, seeing the look on Haruhi’s face, “—ask me about art stuff. I don’t know anything about it.”

“No? You’re not in the business?”

You shrugged. “I know what looks pretty and what doesn’t. And as far as I’m concerned, that’s all I need to know.”

“Fair enough. Fair enough.” Haruhi began to ask another question, but she trailed off, looking at something over your shoulder. Feeling self-conscious, you turned around to see what she was looking at. Immediately, Hikaru and Kaoru whipped around in their seats, returning to the conversations they’d been having too quickly for it to be natural.

“Am I going to have to worry about those two?” you said.

“Probably.”

You narrowed your eyes in the twins’ direction. You scooted a little closer to Haruhi in an attempt to keep the conversation between the two of you.

“So what about you? Do you come from money?”

“No, actually. I’m here on scholarship.”

Your eyes widened. “No kidding? You must be a bona fide genius. Ouran has ridiculously high standards for scholarship students.”

“It’s not too bad. I’m used to working for what I want. If you put in the time and effort, the course work isn’t all that bad.”

You found Haruhi’s humility refreshing. It seemed like everyone at Ouran was bragging about one thing or other nowadays. You probably wouldn’t have shut up about how smart you were if you had managed to get into Ouran on scholarship.

“So is this all there is to the Host Club?” You leaned back in your seat. “You get tea and biscuits. You talk. You look pretty?”

“If only. You’ve only been exposed to a small fraction of what this club is capable of.” With the way Haruhi said it, it didn’t seem like a good thing.

As if on cue, a great gasp went up in the middle of the room. A gaggle of girls had clustered around Hikaru and Kaoru, one of the twins sprawled on the ground while the other tenderly supported his head.

“Oh, Hikaru, are you alright? You really have to be more careful. You’re always so clumsy,” Karou said in a strangely breathless voice.

Hikaru brought up Kaoru’s hand and pressed it weakly against his cheek. “I can’t help it. I wish there was some way to change my character.”

“But you don’t need to change it. Not when I’m here to protect you.”

The twins stared deeply into each other’s eyes like there was no one else in the room. The girls gasped and broke into applause, blubbering among themselves about how sweet and pure brotherly affection was, whatever that was.

Haruhi burst out laughing at the disgusted look on your face. “I take it you’re not a fan of the forbidden brotherly love trope, then?”
“Is that what that is? Yeah, no, you can count me out.” You watched the girls freak out over the twins for a few more seconds. If you didn’t know better, you’d say the twins were trying to bite back laughter.

“Are people really into this stuff?”

“They sure are. The Host Club is all about providing genuine, heartfelt romance.”

You scoffed. “ This isn’t romance. It isn’t anywhere near it.”

“And how would you know?”

“I know because I—”

You cut yourself off. How did you know? Because you had fallen in love over the break? Because you were still reeling from the breakup? 

Because you still weren’t over him?

“I know because I know,” you finished lamely. “Obviously no real-life romance isn’t like this.”

Haruhi gave you a strange look. It felt like she was prying you apart and could see your words for exactly what they were. You felt your face heating up. 

“What happened?” she asked quietly. “Every time anyone brings up anything about love you seem to close up. I can tell you’re trying to go for the cynical route, but is that really what you’re all about?”

Haruhi’s brown eyes were wide and guileless. She was asking out of pure curiosity, not to belittle you or mock you. For a second, you almost answered her, until you realized dimly that the music room had gone eerily silent.

You looked up, shocked to find a single spotlight beaming down on you. All of the guests had turned in their seats to listen to you, and the hosts were all but leaning over your shoulder, holding their breaths in anticipation.

“You can’t be serious,” you snapped, shooting to your feet. “Where is my guest confidentiality supposed to be in this?”

“You can get that later,” Honey said, leaning forward from his seat on Mori’s shoulder. “Just finish answering the question first. What are you really all about?”

You gaped at him for a second, then looked at the other hosts. Despite the varying degrees of amusement in their faces, they did genuinely seem curious to hear your answer. 

Well. That was too bad.

“Let’s go,” you said, grabbing Haruhi’s hand. “Obviously we can’t have a private conversation here.”

“But where are you going?” Tamaki cried. “There’s no better place to pour your heart out than here!”

“I can think of an infinite number of places,” you retorted. You dragged Haruhi out of the music room, glaring at Kyoya as you left. He only shrugged, as though having everyone in the Host Club and their mother listening in on your conversation was to be expected.

“Paragons of manner and class, my ass.”

“We’re sorry,” the twins called after you. “How were we supposed to know you liked privacy?”

You would’ve thrown them an obscene gesture, but there were ladies present and you did actually have a reputation. 

Haruhi let you take her all the way out of the academy to one of the many fountains gushing around outside. It was your favourite one, the one with the little kid pissing into the water. It never failed to make you snicker.

“I’m sorry about them,” Haruhi said when you finally stopped. She was faintly breathless and you couldn’t help but find it a little cute as she drew up a hand to swipe her hair out of her face. “I keep forgetting you have to build up a tolerance to their obnoxiousness.”

“I can tell they’re harmless. That was just a bit much.” You took a seat on one of the steps overlooking the fountain and patted the spot beside you for Haruhi to join you. For a while, you were both quiet as you watched clouds drift by in the fountain’s reflection.

“Are you going to answer my question?” Haruhi said. There was no pressure behind it. 

You leaned back on your hands. “I’m not really that cynical about love. I believe in it. Just … maybe not as much as I used to. I’m wary, I guess.”

Haruhi didn’t pry any further than that and you liked her all the more for it. You both started talking about whatever crossed your minds, plucking subjects out of the air. You learned about Haruhi’s dad and his fierce dedication to her. You learned about her crazy time in the Host Club. If the anecdotes had come from anyone but Haruhi, you wouldn’t have believed them. 

The little tidbits she gave you about each of the hosts was fascinating. You thought you knew Honey and Mori relatively well, but it seemed that they were completely different people in the context of the club. Kyoya having his own personal guard only made you trust him less, and Tamaki being the son of Ouran’s chairman was probably something you should have seen coming. Haruhi only succeeded in giving you a headache when she tried to explain how it was possible to tell the difference between Hikaru and Kaoru. You were convinced that short of permanently tattooing their names on their foreheads, you would never be able to tell the two twins apart.

What you got out of your conversation with Haruhi was that she was very close with all of the hosts. Her pragmatism occupied its own special nook in the club, and it, along with all of the quirks and ticks of the other hosts, somehow kept the outlandish club going. Even if it wasn’t love or romance, there was genuine feeling in the club. If nothing else, you could appreciate that the Host Club was doing all of this not for any malicious intent, but for the wellbeing of Ouran. In the stifling, uptight academy, there needed to be something this overwhelmingly ludicrous to take students’ minds off of things.

Eventually, Haruhi stretched out her legs.

“I think it’s time we start heading home. We’ve been here for a while.” 

“I think you’re right. My tolerance for bullshit has been all used up.”

Haruhi laughed. She had a light, surprisingly girlish laugh. You liked it. A lot. 

Impulsively, you said, “Hey, if you’re free tomorrow night, my parents are hosting a little art gathering tomorrow. It’s nothing formal. Just a little get-together. I’d love it if you could come.”

Haruhi thought for a moment. “I probably could. Are you sure your parents wouldn’t mind? I’m not—I mean, I’m not really part of the ritzy crowd, you could say.”

You waved a hand. “They couldn’t care less about that. You don’t have to be rich to appreciate art, they’d say, or something sappy like that.”

“In that case, I’d love to go.”

You grinned. “Great. You can come by anytime after seven.” You took out your phone and asked for Haruhi’s number. You then texted over your address, feeling a little giddy that you had her number.

Even though there was nothing to be giddy about. Nothing at all.

You and Haruhi made your way to the front gate. There was an awkward moment when Haruhi turned to face you and you scrambled for some eloquent way to say goodbye. She looked pretty in the fading light. You could make all kinds of poetic comparisons. The simplest thing to say was that the light glimmered, catching hints of gold in her hair and eyes.

Haruhi blushed. You blinked, then swore internally, wondering if you’d said that crap out loud.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said, smiling.

“Yeah, see you then.”

You waved, and kept waving until she was out of sight. Why couldn’t everyone in the Host Club be like Haruhi? You might actually look forward to going instead of—

“I hope you know you still have several other trial appointments,” Kyoya said from behind you.

You side-eyed him. “And why would I go to any of them? Haruhi’s a great host. I don’t need to try out anyone else.”

Kyoya looked to where Haruhi had just left. He slipped his hands into his pockets. “I suppose you and Haruhi did hit it off quite well.”

“Yeah. We did.”

“Regardless, it’s important to have an idea of all of your tastes. It doesn’t hurt to have a second choice. There may be times when Haruhi is unavailable as a host and you have to pick someone else.”

“Okay, well then I guess I would just go with Honey or Mori—”

“You can’t know until you go to the trials,” Kyoya interrupted. “We’ll put down a definitive second choice for you after you’ve gone through everyone tomorrow.”

You groaned. “You’re telling me I have to go again ?”

“Most people would see that as a good thing. Besides, a broken heart can’t be healed in a day. You’ll have to return to the club multiple times if you want to have a chance of healing anything. We’ll need to monitor your progress.”

“What are you, a doctor?”

“No, although I don’t doubt that the Ootori Group would be interested in any research I might be able to contribute.”

It really was impressive how seriously Kyoya was able to take all of this. If he was playing a character, he was doing it scarily well.

“I’ll stop by if I have the time,” you said. “Later, Kyoya.”

He called your name as you were leaving. He had an odd expression on his face.

“There’s nothing wrong with being wary. Particularly about romance. One might say it’s to be expected.”

Your stomach dropped. “What? How did—”

“I expect to see you at the Host Club tomorrow. I’ll send someone to collect you.”

Kyoya turned curtly on his heel. You thought about going after him, but then you decided you didn’t want to know. You went off to find your chauffeur instead.

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

Even though there were a million reasons why you shouldn’t, you couldn’t stop yourself from going to his profile when the last bell of the day chimed. It was a sign of weakness, and you felt terrible for succumbing to it, but you hadn’t been able to rid the thought from your head the entire day. All of a sudden, you just had to see him again, look at his face, find out if you were remembering him right. It didn’t seem right that he could still exist if you weren’t there anymore.

It was a very, very bad idea. You followed the stream of purple blazers out of the classroom, barely aware of anything but your phone in front of you. He was still there. The same as ever, yet not somehow. His eyes were different. Wide and more animated. You stared at his careless hands, the way they slung over railings and shoulders and hips. His smile looked like a foreign entity. It didn’t belong on his face, but it beamed out at you like it did. 

Why was he so happy? 

You never used the word, but his profile genuinely made you feel wretched. An addicting kind of misery that you couldn’t get out of. Picture after picture after picture. You stared hungrily at everyone he posed with, trying to figure out who they were. Was it possible that someone could have taken your place? All of these people, who didn’t have a clue who you were. Him being the only thing you had common.

Except the him in your head and the him looking back at you were two different people.

He’d posted a video recently. At some kind of event with muted lighting and narrow black ties. You told yourself that you knew better and tapped play anyway.

Someone had recorded him giving a brief introductory speech. His hair was carefully styled and his suit was perfectly fitted, as always. He was calm. Confident. Self-assured. He smiled often and easily. It was more like he was talking to a friend than a room of over two hundred people. You were surprised at how much it hurt, seeing the small movements of his hands, the way they accented his sentences and helped them along.

“Do you like giving speeches?” You remembered asking him once. He’d wrinkled his nose.

“Of course not. Why would you think that?”

“You’re so good at it. You never seem nervous about talking to anyone.”

“I’m just good at hiding things. I think I’m too good at that for my own good.”

“You could never hide anything from me,” you said archly. “I know you too well.”

He smiled then. “You’re right about that.”

So many things to regret, you realized. You shouldn’t have said anything to him. You couldn’t think back on any of your conversations together without shrivelling up.

You couldn’t bring yourself to wish you’d never met, though. You weren’t sorry about that. You didn’t think you could ever be.

“Hello? I didn’t know being heartbroken made you deaf too.”

Someone was snapping their fingers in front of your face. You hoped against hope that it wasn’t who you thought it was, but of course the universe would never be so kind to you as that.

“Hello to you too, Renge.”

“Where are you going?” she asked. 

“I was just on my way to the Host Club,” you replied feebly. You noticed that Renge wasn’t wearing the usual Ouran uniform. Instead, Renge had on a light dress with a brimmed hat and matching parasol. It looked faintly twentieth-century. Renge dug her fingernails into your arm and started dragging you—not upstairs, but outside.

“We’re changing things up today. The Host Club has a variety of events that they cycle through for their guests’ enjoyment. You’ll be lucky enough to witness one such event at present.”

“Events? What is that supposed to mean?”

You quickly found out. The Host Club had relocated to one of the lawns outside, tables and chairs set off to the side for the guests. Finger sandwiches and cool glasses of lemonade were served underneath wide blue umbrellas pitched for shade. The main spectacle seemed to be whatever game the hosts were involved in. You squinted at the multi-coloured balls and what looked to be hoops stuck in the grass. What the hell was this supposed to be?

“Ah, so glad you could join us, my poor heartbroken angel.” 

Tamaki approached you then, tipping the brim of his hat in greeting. He was dressed in a white linen suit and spotless leather shoes. You wondered if the red ribbon in his hat and his red argyle socks was supposed to mean something.

“What’s going on?” you asked.

“Have you ever played croquet? It’s a delightful game, especially when the weather is so warm.”

“Never heard of it,” you said flatly. “I thought I was supposed to do my other trial appointments.”

“You would be correct. I see no reason why that can’t happen over a game of croquet.” Tamaki extended his elbow. You stared until Renge hissed at you to take it. She gave you a pointed look before melting uncannily into the shadows of the surrounding trees.

The rest of the Host Club was dressed in similarly old-fashioned clothes. Honey looked absolutely adorable in white khaki shorts and a plaid sweater vest. Kyoya and Mori were wearing similar linen suits to Tamaki, only with blue and green, respectively. To your dismay, the twins were dressed identically in white polos, slacks and caps. The only thing marking them apart were their different coloured bow ties.

You looked around for Haruhi to see what her outfit was. You managed to find her chatting with a trio of girls, wearing a white blazer and striped trousers. She waved when she saw you, then had to reach up to right her hat when it nearly slipped off. You stifled a grin.

“Yay, you’re here!” Honey exclaimed. He ran over to you with a platter of finger sandwiches. “Do you want one?”

You stooped to take one, then whispered in Honey’s ear, “Is there any way you can get me out of this? I’m not even dressed appropriately.”

“Hikaru and Kaoru can help you with that,” Honey answered immediately. “They came prepared!”

“What do you mean—”

As if by magic, one of the twins pushed out a changing screen and the other a rack of white linen clothes.

“Worry not,” Tamaki said. “We have an entire collection of croquet attire at your disposal. The twins will be happy to assist you.”

Great, except that you weren’t happy to be assisted. Honey pushed you behind the screen where you were disconcerted to find both twins already there. They thrust a hanger into your hands and said together, “Wear this.”

You eyed the clothes, then looked at the twins. For a second, you all just stared at each other. Not that you would ever admit it, but the twins looked surprisingly good in polos. 

“You want to take my clothes off for me?” you deadpanned.

With a shrug, the two of them retreated from the changing screen. Aware that you wouldn’t have much choice in the matter, you slipped on the clothes and went outside. At least everything fit pretty well, which made you wonder if that had this entire clothes rack specially tailored.

Tamaki actually started tearing up when he saw you. “You look wonderful,” he said, with a sigh.

“Misery is the best accessory,” one of the twins said, and you had to bite back a swear.

Someone set a hat on top of your head. You glanced up to find Mori trying to set the hat straight.

“Thanks.”

Mori nodded.

For the next little bit, Tamaki painstakingly tried to explain the rules of croquet. There was a specific order to the hoops, the colour of the balls, the direction of striking and the mallets. To you, it seemed like a whole lot of nothing, but Tamaki was being so patient that you tried to humour him. Eventually, it was just easiest to hit your black ball whenever someone told you, scoring be damned.

Small bursts of applause sounded whenever one of the hosts got their ball through a hoop and they would wave and smile like benevolent princes. Unfortunately, the three hosts who should’ve been your fallbacks--Honey, Mori and Haruhi--decided not to participate in the croquet game, and spent the whole time serving lemonade and making small talk with the guests. You tried multiple times to sneak off to join them, but either Tamaki or one of the twins would firmly pull you back toward your mallet.

It turned out there were no trial appointments. It was just you trying to keep up a conversation with four different people and wondering why it was so hard to hit a ball with a mallet.

“So, do you have any hobbies?” Kyoya asked. It was stupid how easy he made croquet look.

“Not croquet,” you muttered.

“It’s not for everyone,” Tamaki said sympathetically. “Are you having trouble? Maybe you’re not holding the mallet right.”

“I’m holding it fine.”

“Honey told us you play volleyball,” the twin you decided was Hikaru said.

“Yeah, but I decided to take a break.”

“How come?” asked the twins.

“People take breaks,” you said evasively. “Is that a crime?”

“Breaks are always refreshing,” Tamaki said. “They can help you see things with new eyes. You might come back and do something you’ve never done before.”
Or suddenly become disenchanted and wonder how you’d ever liked such stupid hobbies. That had happened to a lot of things after the break. Nothing had seemed quite as interesting anymore.

People’s interests changed, you told yourself. Nothing wrong with that.

Kyoya leaned on his mallet. “I heard you vacationed in Malta over the break. How was that?”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “And who did you hear that from?”

“Honey.”

Honey was telling everyone your business, wasn’t he?

“It was nice,” you said, the noncommittal answer of everyone ever.

Tamaki’s face brightened. “Ooh, I’ve heard wonderful things about Malta from my father. How was it? You must have met so many gorgeous faces.”

You focused intently on your mallet. “None more than usual.” You had a feeling you knew exactly what bush the hosts were beating around. You had to turn things before they trampled the bush to the ground.

“So, what exactly is this event supposed to cater to? Do people enjoy watching you punt balls around?”

Tamaki looked offended. “This is a croquet party, darling. There’s nothing more refreshing than dressing in light, airy clothes and enjoying a simple game of croquet under the shining sun.” He extended a hand at the various other games going on, the coloured balls clacking against hoops and mallets. How was it that everyone was better at this game than you were?

“And you do stuff like this often?”

“Whenever the opportunity arises,” Kyoya answered. “We like to keep things entertaining. The last thing we want is for the Host Club to become stale. Perhaps a volleyball game would better suit your taste?”

It would. You could just imagine the looks on everyone's faces when you trounced them with a serve.

Kaoru’s next question was about as subtle as a semi truck. “What’s your opinion on physical displays of affection?”

Your ball went in the complete opposite direction you’d intended. Hikaru smothered a laugh and you glared at him.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Just that. What are you comfortable with?” Kaoru said.

“Do you like hugs?” Tamaki asked eagerly. “I give very good hugs.”

“Or maybe you’re more inclined towards hand-holding?” Kyoya said.

You were suddenly very aware of your hands. You clenched them into fists, embarrassed with yourself. “I would probably be alright with anything if I knew that person well enough.” 

“So you’re alright with kisses?” Hikaru said, suddenly next to you.

“On the mouth?” Kaoru added from your other side.

“We met two days ago,” you said, shoving both of them. “Don’t get ahead of yourselves.”

“Oh, Tamaki!” a high-pitched voice trilled. Everyone turned to watch a pretty girl with a billowing white skirt cross the lawn toward you. A pout downturned her mouth and eyebrows. “I can’t get a ball through the hoop for the life of me! I must be too weak. If only there was someone who could show me how to do it!” 

The syrupy texture of the girl’s voice made you cringe internally. Tamaki ate it right up, however, drawing the girl towards him with a congenial smile.

“Don’t give up hope, darling. Surely a beautiful girl could win an entire match if you put your heart into it.”

The girl blushed and bashfully led Tamaki off. The pair of them looked like a portrait against the lush grass and blue sky.

You shuddered. “I can’t score either, but you don’t see me moaning about it.”

“Well, since you admitted it yourself, you have been terrible at this croquet thing so far,” Kaoru said.

Hikaru nodded. “Mhm. It’s almost embarrassing how bad you are.”

You glowered at them from under the brim of your hat. “Why don’t I show you where you can shove those mallets?”

The twins only laughed, moving off to mingle with a different croquet game.

Kyoya’s face was carefully neutral. “You’re only doing poorly because you’re not focusing.”

“Are you sure these hoops are even big enough for a ball to pass through?”

“Quite.” All of a sudden, Kyoya was beside you. Not close enough to touch, but closer than you were expecting. Your heartbeat quickened just a little.

“First of all, this isn’t a golf club. You don’t have to swing it so far back.” Kyoya guided the mallet closer to your person. Professionally, you told yourself. Nothing intimate about it.

“Just swing back the mallet gently back like a pendulum, through your legs, and there you go.” 

Your croquet ball rolled in a straight line through the grass and through the hoop, so easily it was a little insulting.

“Thanks,” you said, a little sheepishly. “I guess I was overdoing it.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” Kyoya said. You turned to find that your faces weren’t so far apart. A tiny smile touched Kyoya’s lips and you liked how the expression looked on him, how unassuming it was. Kyoya’s eyes flickered to yours and he looked a little surprised.

He said, “I was meaning to ask--”

“Woah, heads up!” someone hollered.

You looked up, then nearly soiled your pants to find a croquet ball hurtling straight towards you. You scrambled back, but not fast enough to avoid the ball, which slammed into your forehead and immediately hurt like hell. You  accidentally knocked into Kyoya and sent both of you sprawling backwards on the grass. Kyoya swore as your head landed right on his stomach, knocking the breath out of him.

“ARE YOU OKAY?” Hikaru, or maybe Kaoru yelled, running up to you. Both twins leaned over you and Kyoya, their faces identically horrified.

“I’m so sorry,” Hikaru said in a rush. “I didn't mean to hit you!”

Kaoru shoved his twin. “I told you hitting the mallet like a bat was stupid!”

“You’re the one who suggested it!”

“You’re the one who actually did it!”

“What happened?” Tamaki rushed to join the twins. When he looked at you, his face turned dark before he exploded.

“You could have killed them!” he shrieked. “Look at that welt on their forehead! Whose bright idea was this?”

The twins pointed accusingly at each other. Tamaki’s face reddened. He looked between Hikaru and Kaoru, probably deciding on who to beat up first.

“Calm down, Tamaki. No one’s dead.” Haruhi placed a hand on Tamaki’s shoulder and all of the steam went out of him. He sagged against her and ran a hand through his dishevelled hair. 

“No, of course not. Please forgive me, Hikaru. Kaoru. I didn’t mean to lose my temper.”

Mori helped you to your feet, Kyoya groaning as you got off of him.

“Are you okay?” Honey said, his eyes wide. “Do you want me to kiss your forehead all better?”

You rubbed your forehead, wincing. “No. I should be fine. I think Kyoya’s the one who needs kissing.”

Kyoya refused Mori’s hand and got up himself, dusting off his suit and readjusting his glasses. If it weren’t for the unfortunate grass stains on his pants and the bits of grass in his hair, you would never have known he’d taken a tumble.

“Sorry about that,” you said.

“It’s quite alright,” Kyoya said, only sounding a little strained. “You didn’t mean to. The twins, however …”

A storm cloud seemed to descend over Kyoya’s brow. He grabbed each twin’s shoulder with one hand and steered them away from you, muttering to them intently. His aura seemed so dark and menacing that a collective shudder went through everyone still present.

“There goes a day,” Tamaki said, swinging his mallet in his hand. He looked at you and smiled. “Now that your trial appointments are over, do you have a second choice for your host?”

You looked straight into his eyes when you said, “I stand by my earlier assessment. If Haruhi’s not here, I’ll just go with Honey or Mori.”

Tamaki’s smile went brittle. “And what if they aren’t here either?”

You grinned. “I guess I just won’t come at all.”

Tamaki fell on his tailbone abruptly, looking shell shocked. “N-not come at all?” He started rocking himself back and forth, whispering to himself.

“I think you might have killed him,” Haruhi said.

“Whoops,” you said.

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

The Host Club was sepia-toned today, the curtains drawn and armchairs arranged in a circle like the hosts were all characters in a smoking room.

The Host Club rarely ever had days off. It simply wasn’t in Kyoya’s nature to allow such monetary losses, and it left everyone else incredibly bored besides. Only on extremely pressing matters did Kyoya make exceptions.

Somehow, this happened to be one of them. And at Renge’s insistence, nonetheless.

“Gentlemen,” Renge began, “as I’m sure you’re well aware, we have a very unique guest under our care.” Everyone nodded sagely. Haruhi cocked an eyebrow.

“We’re talking about Y/N?”

Kyoya retrieved his black notebook. “Indeed. With Renge’s input, I thought it necessary to have a meeting discussing the club’s approach over the next little while. There’s quite a lot banking on our guest’s successful recovery.”

Haruhi was still unfazed. “Like what?”

“Why, the reputation of the club!” Tamaki exclaimed. “We’ve announced to the entire academy that we’ll be able to heal a broken heart! We’re bound to that promise! By doing so, we’re displaying the true prowess of the Host Club!”

“Not to mention our own dignity,” the twins said.

“And Y/N themself, of course!” Honey added.

“This is no trivial matter,” Kyoya said when he noticed Haruhi hiding a smirk. “It is in everyone’s best interest that Y/N recovers from their broken heart. No effort shall be spared. It’s all or nothing. Mori, if you please.”

Mori wheeled out an old-school projector from some unseen corner and handed Kyoya the switch. The lights dimmed and a screen lowered from the ceiling.

“Where did we get that from?” Haruhi whispered. Tamaki shushed her.

Kyoya moved to the first slide—an admittedly very unflattering picture of Y/N caught mid-yawn. The twins snickered.

“Judging at first by their demeanour and behaviour, I believed Y/N L/N was only a class C student. Class B at best. That, however, is not the case. Y/N is, in fact, a Class A student, possessing both wealth and lineage.” 

A family tree was shown next. Renge pointed out the spots of interest.

“Their mother is a renowned art critic and their father is an art conservator-restorator. They’re both highly regarded in the art crowd and regularly make large contributions to museums, galleries and independent artists. On their paternal side, Y/N’s family includes a long line of portrait painters. On their maternal side, various sculptors and art historians.”

“I thought Y/N wasn’t into art,” Haruhi murmured.

“They aren’t,” Honey said. “They’ve always been bad at it. They couldn’t care less about it.”

“And their parents are okay with that?”

Kyoya switched to the next slide. Y/N’s current academy ID as well as an overview of their studies appeared. “Y/N has strengths in other areas. They were the captain of the volleyball team. They’re looked favourably upon by teachers, well-liked by students and already have a scholarship for open studies overseas. They have an extensive volunteer history both in and out of Ouran and are well-acquainted with various internships in the area. In short, they have no problem looking out for themself.”

Everyone was briefly quiet.

“That doesn’t sound like Y/N,” Kaoru said.

“That doesn’t even look like Y/N,” Hikaru  said, eyeing the flawless uniform and perfect complexion in the ID picture.

Honey reddened. “That is them. And everything Kyoya and Renge said is true. They just changed a bit after the break.”

“Perhaps what is more interesting to us is their dating history,” Kyoya said, the next slide already in place. “Brief interactions a few years ago, but nothing recently. Supposedly.”

Haruhi frowned. “And you say that because…”

“Their social media has been wiped clean,” Regne said plainly. “Any posts or pictures that could possibly indicate the relationship status have been deleted. And the thing is, they were posting regularly up until their vacation to Malta over the break.”

Tamaki gasped suddenly and clasped his hands over his heart. “Do you mean to tell me that my poor darling had their heart broken during a tropical vacation?” 

Because everyone knew Tamaki too well, his sudden vision might as well have projected for everyone else to see as well. In Tamaki’s mind’s eye, the camera focused on a blinding sun before panning down to a hopelessly blue ocean. It followed the waves until they broke on soft, white sand, two sets of footprints disappearing in the seafoam. 

Y/N appeared, smiling gently, looking like the clearer, better version in their ID picture. Their hands reached out to some unseen, sun-kissed stranger before being snatched away, an anguished scream escaping their mouth and tears forming in their eyes. “How could you?” they cried, snatching their hands away before running off, sobbing.

The vision faded. Tamaki sniffled. “How terrible.”

“Oh no, is that what happened?” Honey said, burning his face in Mori’s shoulder. “I had no idea! No wonder they were so quiet during their vacation! They must have been too embarrassed to say anything to us.”

Mori grunted, neither confirming nor denying this. Something like guilt flickered in his eyes as he looked again at Y/N’s empty profiles.

“Of course, we don’t know that for sure,” Kyoya said. “But their heartbreak is fairly obvious and worse than that, they’re intent on denying it. Helping them will be no easy matter. They’ve already shown how stubborn they can be.”

“ It won’t be through your usual tactics,” Renge said. “Not one type in this whole club appeals to them.”

“Hey—” Haruhi started.

“Haruhi, you don’t count,” the twins said matter-of-factly.

“I know they’re only here because they don’t want to hurt my and Taka-chan’s feelings,” Honey said sadly. “They think the Host Club is silly.”

Tamaki blinked. “Silly?”

“Incredibly so,” Hikaru said.

“No better than a circus,” Kaoru said.

“B-but...” Tamaki looked at Haruhi, already teary-eyed.

“They’re not wrong,” she said and that was all Tamaki needed to float over to the corner to sulk.

“This endeavour will require time outside of the club,” Kyoya said, scribbling in his notebook. “Which is rather difficult, seeing as none of us have any notable class overlap with Y/N.”

“Mori and I have math together with Y/N,” Honey said, puffing out his cheeks.

“How romantic,” Kaoru drawled.

“As I said, no notable class overlap,” Kyoya continued. “Even within the club, appointments last for twenty minutes at most. We’ll have to find opportunities outside of the club to interact with Y/N.”

“Oh, their parents are hosting a party tonight!” Honey exclaimed. “They’d love it if we came over!”

Tamaki drifted back from his sulking corner. Kyoya paused in his writing. “What kind of party exactly?”

“They said it wasn’t anything formal,” Haruhi supplied. “An art get-together. They said we could stop by after seven.”

Kyoya and Tamaki exchanged knowing looks. “Meaning it will be very formal.”

Haruhi balked. “What? But Y/N said—”

“People have a habit of downplaying things,” Kyoya said dismissively. “In any case, it’s always safer to be overdressed.” He snapped his notebook closed and then tugged on the projector screen to return it to the ceiling. The lights were restored a beat later.

“Alright, everyone. Dress sharply and report to Y/N’s residence at seven in the evening sharp. Prepare a gift but make sure it’s small, Y/N’s family appreciates subtlety. Familiarize yourself with at least one piece of art trivia in order to make conversation. Preferably not the classics or anything too pretentious.”

Renge’s eyes glinted menacingly. “While you boys are at the party, I’m going to do some digging on Y/N’s dating history.”

“Isn’t that a breach of privacy?” Haruhi said.

“This is what they signed up for. This information is pertinent to their treatment.” Renge flitted out of the room before Haruhi could remind her that technically, Y/N had never signed up for any of this.

Haruhi was still sitting on an armchair once everyone left. She blinked at Kyoya. “Are you sure it’s going to be such a big thing? Y/N made it seem like it was just for fun.”

“Quite sure. You’ll thank me for dressing up." Kyoya only sounded slightly condescending."See if the twins have any suits they can loan you. I’ll send a cab to pick you up.”

Haruhi still looked dubious. “If you say so.”

♡ .⁺ 

Evidently, there was a very specific vibe the art gathering was going for. Haruhi noticed it immediately upon arriving at Y/N’s house, but she struggled to find the word for it. Elegant but a little rough around the edges. Professional but still boisterous. Bursts of colour contained behind sharp edges and smoked glass. The clothes the Host Club had picked out mirrored some of that. Pressed slacks and vibrant dress shirts, scarves and shiny, impractical shoes.

Even though Y/N had invited Haruhi themself, she still felt a little hesitant about the whole thing.

“Are you sure Y/N won’t mind that all of us are here?” she asked Honey. She was waiting with him on the front drive while the twins snatched Mori off for some last-minute adjustments. Tamaki and Kyoya had yet to arrive.

“If these gatherings are anything like I remember, they’ll be thrilled,” Honey said, beaming. Haruhi just loved the little cap on his head to bits. “These always tend to be dull. Business and all that. Y/N usually ends up being the youngest person here.”

“In that case, having such young, vibrant faces is sure to liven things up,” Kaoru said, his arms linked with Hikaru’s. Mori followed along behind them, his flowy silk scarf knotted in a deceptively simple bow.

Hikaru brushed some invisible lint off of his slate-grey blazer. “I thought Kyoya said to be here at seven sharp. Where are he and the Boss? ”

“I hope they didn’t get lost,” Honey said, pouting.

Haruhi looked up at Y/N’s house, trying to match the exterior to the person. Not that it matched much. Y/N was loose, blasé. Nonchalant and sharply critical. Haruhi wasn’t quite sure how those qualities should culminate in a house, but this one didn’t seem to do it.

They all waited five minutes for Kyoya and Tamaki. Then fifteen. Tamaki, they could understand being late, but nothing short of a catastrophic event would have kept Kyoya from coming on time. Honey tried calling the two of them a few times but none of the calls went through. 

“Should we go in without them?” Hikaru asked.

“Might as well,” his brother replied. “We’re going to miss the party standing out here.”

Despite that, no one went in. There was nothing wrong to go in without Tamaki and Kyoya, but there was something about it that felt like going into battle without their commander and general.

Honey’s lip trembled. “Maybe we should call this whole thing off.”

“But we’re already here,” Haruhi said. “It’d be rude to leave without telling anyone.”

“But no one knows we’re here,” Hikaru argued.

The hosts bickered among themselves. They were still bickering when Mori unfolded himself from the front step, stood up, and said, “They’re here.”

A black car pulled into the drive. The passenger door opened quickly, someone blonde rushing out to open one of the back doors. It nearly swung open into the blonde one’s face and whoever it was got out, reaching back in to lug out a large, unwieldy statue. They just barely missed knocking over someone else wearing glasses before the trio made their way up to the front door.

Honey cheered. “Tamaki, Kyoya, Y/N! You’re all here!”

Tamaki looked sheepish. Kyoya was stone-faced. Y/N looked like they could bite someone’s head off. They craned their neck around the statue they were carrying to glower at everyone.

“Who invited you?” they barked at the twins. 

“We invited ourselves,” Kaoru sniffed.

“Someone had to brighten up your boring art gathering,” Hikaru said.

Y/N muttered something under their breath. “Hold this,” they said, thrusting the statue at Mori. He took it without comment and Y/N marched up the steps to unlock their door. A bit of jazz wafted outside, and it was almost funny, how at odds it sounded against Y/N’s black mood.

They took the statue back from Mori and went inside without inviting anyone. But they had left the door open, though, so the hosts gradually drifted inside.

“I thought you said to meet here at seven sharp,” Haruhi whispered to Kyoya. “How’d you end up in the same car as Y/N?”

“We got a bit caught up,” Kyoya muttered, trading looks with Tamaki. “We were obtaining art trivia and didn’t expect it to take so long.”

Tamaki gave a pained smile. “Well, it wasn’t intentional."

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

The Host Club was sepia-toned today, the curtains drawn and armchairs arranged in a circle like the hosts were all characters in a smoking room.

The Host Club rarely ever had days off. It simply wasn't in Kyoya's nature to allow such monetary losses, and it left everyone else incredibly bored besides. Only on extremely pressing matters did Kyoya make exceptions.

Somehow, this happened to be one of them. And at Renge's insistence, nonetheless.

"Gentlemen," Renge began, "as I'm sure you're well aware, we have a very unique guest under our care." Everyone nodded sagely. Haruhi cocked an eyebrow. 

She asked whether they were talking about you.

Kyoya retrieved his black notebook. "Indeed. With Renge's input, I thought it necessary to have a meeting discussing the club's approach over the next little while. There's quite a lot banking on our guest's successful recovery."

Haruhi was still unfazed. "Like what?"

"Why, the reputation of the club!" Tamaki exclaimed. "We've announced to the entire academy that we'll be able to heal a broken heart! We're bound to that promise! By doing so, we're displaying the true prowess of the Host Club!"

"Not to mention our own dignity," the twins said.

"This is no trivial matter," Kyoya said when he noticed Haruhi hiding a smirk. "It is in everyone's best interest that they recover from their broken heart. No effort shall be spared. It's all or nothing. Mori, if you please."

Mori wheeled out an old-school projector from some unseen corner and handed Kyoya the switch. The lights dimmed and a screen lowered from the ceiling.

"Where did we get that from?" Haruhi whispered. Tamaki shushed her.

Kyoya moved to the first slide—an admittedly very unflattering picture of you caught mid-yawn. The twins snickered.

"Judging at first by their demeanour and behaviour, I believed they was only a class C student. Class B at best. That, however, is not the case. They are, in fact, a Class A student, possessing both wealth and lineage."

A family tree was shown next. Renge pointed out the spots of interest.

"Their mother is a renowned art critic and their father is an art conservator-restorator. They're both highly regarded in the art crowd and regularly make large contributions to museums, galleries and independent artists. On their paternal side, their family includes a long line of portrait painters. On their maternal side, various sculptors and art historians."

"I thought they weren't into art," Haruhi murmured.

"They aren't," Honey said. "They've always been bad at it. They couldn't care less about it."

"And their parents are okay with that?"

Kyoya switched to the next slide. Your current academy ID as well as an overview of your studies appeared. "They have strengths in other areas. They were the captain of the volleyball team. They're looked favourably upon by teachers, well-liked by students and already have a scholarship for open studies overseas. They have an extensive volunteer history both in and out of Ouran and are well-acquainted with various internships in the area. In short, they have no problem looking out for themself."

Everyone was briefly quiet.

"That doesn't sound like them," Kaoru said.

"That doesn't even look like them," Hikaru said, eyeing the flawless uniform and perfect complexion in the ID picture.

Honey reddened. "That is them. And everything Kyoya and Renge said is true. They just changed a bit after the break."

"Perhaps what is more interesting to us is their dating history," Kyoya said, the next slide already in place. "Brief interactions a few years ago, but nothing recently. Supposedly."

Haruhi frowned. "And you say that because..."

"Their social media has been wiped clean," Regne said plainly. "Any posts or pictures that could possibly indicate the relationship status have been deleted. And the thing is, they were posting regularly up until their vacation to Malta over the break."

Tamaki gasped suddenly and clasped his hands over his heart. "Do you mean to tell me that my poor darling had their heart broken during a tropical vacation?"

Because everyone knew Tamaki too well, his sudden vision might as well have projected for everyone else to see as well. In Tamaki's mind's eye, the camera focused on a blinding sun before panning down to a hopelessly blue ocean. It followed the waves until they broke on soft, white sand, two sets of footprints disappearing in the seafoam.

You appeared, smiling gently, looking like the clearer, better version in your ID picture. Your hands reached out to some unseen, sun-kissed stranger before being snatched away, an anguished scream escaping your mouth and tears forming in your eyes. "How could you?" you cried, snatching your hands away before running off, sobbing.

The vision faded. Tamaki sniffled. "How terrible."

"Oh no, is that what happened?" Honey said, burning his face in Mori's shoulder. "I had no idea! No wonder they were so quiet during their vacation! They must have been too embarrassed to say anything to us."

Mori grunted, neither confirming nor denying this. Something like guilt flickered in his eyes as he looked again at your empty profiles.

"Of course, we don't know that for sure," Kyoya said. "But their heartbreak is fairly obvious and worse than that, they're intent on denying it. Helping them will be no easy matter. They've already shown how stubborn they can be."

" It won't be through your usual tactics," Renge said. "Not one type in this whole club appeals to them."

"Hey—" Haruhi started.

"Haruhi, you don't count," the twins said matter-of-factly.

"I know they're only here because they don't want to hurt my and Taka-chan's feelings," Honey said sadly. "They think the Host Club is silly."

Tamaki blinked. "Silly?"

"Incredibly so," Hikaru said.

"No better than a circus," Kaoru said.

"B-but..." Tamaki looked at Haruhi, already teary-eyed.

"They're not wrong," she said and that was all Tamaki needed to float over to the corner to sulk.

"This endeavour will require time outside of the club," Kyoya said, scribbling in his notebook. "Which is rather difficult, seeing as none of us have any notable class overlap with them."

"Mori and I have math together with them," Honey said, puffing out his cheeks.

"How romantic," Kaoru drawled.

"As I said, no notable class overlap," Kyoya continued. "Even within the club, appointments last for twenty minutes at most. We'll have to find opportunities outside of the club to interact with them."

"Oh, their parents are hosting a party tonight!" Honey exclaimed. "They'd love it if we came over!"

Tamaki drifted back from his sulking corner. Kyoya paused in his writing. "What kind of party exactly?"

"They said it wasn't anything formal," Haruhi supplied. "An art get-together. They said we could stop by after seven."

Kyoya and Tamaki exchanged knowing looks. "Meaning it will be very formal."

Haruhi balked. "What? But they said—"

"People have a habit of downplaying things," Kyoya said dismissively. "In any case, it's always safer to be overdressed." He snapped his notebook closed and then tugged on the projector screen to return it to the ceiling. The lights were restored a beat later.

"Alright, everyone. Dress sharply and report to their residence at seven in the evening sharp. Prepare a gift but make sure it's small, their family appreciates subtlety. Familiarize yourself with at least one piece of art trivia in order to make conversation. Preferably not the classics or anything too pretentious."

Renge's eyes glinted menacingly. "While you boys are at the party, I'm going to do some digging on their dating history."

"Isn't that a breach of privacy?" Haruhi said.

"This is what they signed up for. This information is pertinent to their treatment." Renge flitted out of the room before Haruhi could remind her that technically, you had never signed up for any of this.

Haruhi was still sitting on an armchair once everyone left. She blinked at Kyoya. "Are you sure it's going to be such a big thing? they made it seem like it was just for fun."

"Quite sure. You'll thank me for dressing up." Kyoya only sounded slightly condescending."See if the twins have any suits they can loan you. I'll send a cab to pick you up."

Haruhi still looked dubious. "If you say so."

♡ .⁺

Evidently, there was a very specific vibe the art gathering was going for. Haruhi noticed it immediately upon arriving at your house, but she struggled to find the word for it. Elegant but a little rough around the edges. Professional but still boisterous. Bursts of colour contained behind sharp edges and smoked glass. The clothes the Host Club had picked out mirrored some of that. Pressed slacks and vibrant dress shirts, scarves and shiny, impractical shoes.

Even though you had invited Haruhi themself, she still felt a little hesitant about the whole thing.

"Are you sure they won't mind that all of us are here?" she asked Honey. She was waiting with him on the front drive while the twins snatched Mori off for some last-minute adjustments. Tamaki and Kyoya had yet to arrive.

"If these gatherings are anything like I remember, they'll be thrilled," Honey said, beaming. Haruhi just loved the little cap on his head to bits. "These always tend to be dull. Business and all that. They usually end up being the youngest person here."

"In that case, having such young, vibrant faces is sure to liven things up," Kaoru said, his arms linked with Hikaru's. Mori followed along behind them, his flowy silk scarf knotted in a deceptively simple bow.

Hikaru brushed some invisible lint off of his slate-grey blazer. "I thought Kyoya said to be here at seven sharp. Where are he and the Boss?"

"I hope they didn't get lost," Honey said, pouting.

Haruhi looked up at your house, trying to match the exterior to the person. Not that it matched much. You were loose, blasé. Nonchalant and sharply critical. Haruhi wasn't quite sure how those qualities should culminate in a house, but this one didn't seem to do it.

They all waited five minutes for Kyoya and Tamaki. Then fifteen. Tamaki, they could understand being late, but nothing short of a catastrophic event would have kept Kyoya from coming on time. Honey tried calling the two of them a few times but none of the calls went through.

"Should we go in without them?" Hikaru asked.

"Might as well," his brother replied. "We're going to miss the party standing out here."

Despite that, no one went in. There was nothing wrong to go in without Tamaki and Kyoya, but there was something about it that felt like going into battle without their commander and general.

Honey's lip trembled. "Maybe we should call this whole thing off."

"But we're already here," Haruhi said. "It'd be rude to leave without telling anyone."

"But no one knows we're here," Hikaru argued.

The hosts bickered among themselves. They were still bickering when Mori unfolded himself from the front step, stood up, and said, "They're here."

A black car pulled into the drive. The passenger door opened quickly, someone blonde rushing out to open one of the back doors. It nearly swung open into the blonde one's face and whoever it was got out, reaching back in to lug out a large, unwieldy statue. They just barely missed knocking over someone else wearing glasses before the trio made their way up to the front door.

Honey cheered. "You're all here!"

Tamaki looked sheepish. Kyoya was stone-faced. You looked like you could bite someone's head off. You craned you neck around the statue you were carrying to glower at everyone.

"Who invited you?" you barked at the twins.

"We invited ourselves," Kaoru sniffed.

"Someone had to brighten up your boring art gathering," Hikaru said.

You muttered something under your breath. "Hold this," you said, thrusting the statue at Mori. He took it without comment, and you marched up the steps to unlock you door. A bit of jazz wafted outside, and it was almost funny, how at odds it sounded against your black mood.

You took the statue back from Mori and went inside without inviting anyone. But you had left the door open, so the hosts gradually drifted inside.

"I thought you said to meet here at seven sharp," Haruhi whispered to Kyoya. "How did you all end up in the same car?"

"We got a bit caught up," Kyoya muttered, trading looks with Tamaki. "We were obtaining art trivia and didn't expect it to take so long."

Tamaki gave a pained smile. "Well, it wasn't intentional."

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

After dumping the milkmaid statue unceremoniously in the dining room, you had to take a few minutes to mentally fortify yourself before returning to the thick of the art gathering.

These parties were always dull without exception. Maybe the crowd just didn’t speak to you, but you could think of any number of better things to do than stand around talking about art. Even when your parents tried to spruce things up with performers and music and food, you were always begging for release after the first half hour. It was lucky that your parents and their friends found your aversion to art more amusing than irritating.

You slunk back into the living room. If nothing else, at least the Host Club would provide you some amusement. They’d probably be floundering to keep up with all of the art critics and restorators and enthusiasts. 

You took a stance near the punch bowl and poured yourself a glass, leaning against the table to enjoy the show. For the first time, you’d catch them unprepared and out of their element—

Your jaw hit the floor. What the hell.

Somehow, somehow, the Host Club had commandeered your living room and turned it into an extension of Music Room 3. Full grown adults were hanging off of the hosts’ every word, delighted, dreamy expressions on their faces. You stared, gobsmacked, as Kyoya passed by, engrossed in a complicated discussion with an archivist about the shift in twentieth century art. Honey was sitting on a footstool, a tart in one hand while the other waved excitedly about the nouveau movement. Mori listened intently to an animator’s laments about the death of tradition, and Haruhi was naming her favourite Andy Warhol paintings. Off in the corner, the twins took turns complementing one of your mom’s friends on excellent taste in Romantics.

You stumbled, caught yourself on the edge of the table. This couldn’t be happening. The Host Club was not charming their way into the hearts of everyone at this party. They couldn’t be.

The King of the Host Club himself swept by to offer you a hand. “Are you not feeling well, my darling? How about I take you outside for a breeze to cool your flushed cheeks?”

“What are you doing?” you hissed at him. You waved a hand at the hosts. “What is this?”

Tamaki blinked. “We’re merely enjoying ourselves. We thought it would be prudent to make ourselves knowledgeable about a few subjects in the art world to make conversation.”

You guffawed. “Is that what this is? Because you’ve got almost everyone in this room besotted with you.”

“Then does that mean your heart’s embers once again stir with love?” Tamaki asked hopefully.

“Unfortunately not.” You took a hard gulp from your punch glass. Tamaki lingered, still looking hopeful.

“Well don’t let me keep you,” you muttered. “Enjoy yourself to your heart’s content.”

Tamaki took your hand and brushed a kiss across your knuckles. “If you insist, my darling. You know where to find me.” He drifted away and the assembled crowd eagerly welcomed him.

For the next hour, as you sullenly finished glass after glass of punch, there was no shortage of art people who came up to you, practically glowing.

“Are those young men your guests?” they would ask. “They’re so charming and charismatic. What wonderful young men!”

Yet more people would ask, “So which one of them is your boyfriend? Oh, you haven’t picked? Well, I don’t blame you.”

The fake smile you put on pinched your cheeks. “No,” you said flatly. “They’re not my friends. Just classmates from school.”

Everyone smiled knowingly. If you were ever driven to murder, tonight would be the night.

Eventually, you couldn’t take it anymore. You slipped out of the living room and nearly made it to the stairs before your mother stopped you.

“I haven’t seen you all night! Where are you going? You haven’t had dinner yet.”

“I’m not hungry. I have a headache.”

Your mother put a hand over your forehead. “Go up and rest then, I’ll ask Ms. Shimada to send up dinner.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

You turned back up the stairs. Your mother called your name again.

“I’m so glad you’re making friends,” she said. “Especially after … the vacation. It’s good for you. To get to know other people.” She smiled. “They seem like a fun bunch. Not bad looking either.”

Your throat tightened. “Yeah. I guess so.”

As you made your way to your room, you inexplicably felt tears burn behind your eyes. You couldn’t help thinking that he never would have embarrassed you like this. He had always been subtle, low-key. He liked to impress people, but he always made sure you were enjoying yourself first.

Someone slung their arm over your shoulder and you stifled a swear. 

“So, when are you going to show us your room?” Hikaru, or maybe Kaoru asked.

“Yeah, we’re getting pretty antsy downstairs,” Kaoru, or maybe Hikaru said.

You sniffled hard and told your tears to dry up. “A room tour is not part of the art gathering. I’d go back downstairs if I were you.”

“But we’re bored,” the twins whined. “Please, can we see your room?”

“No. Leave me alone. I’m going to bed.”

“Bed?” Hikaru made a face. “It’s barely eight.”

“I like getting my sleep. Goodnight.”

“Come on, just one peek,” Kaoru said. “Then we’ll leave you alone.”

“No.”

Hikaru: “Please?”

“No.”

Kaoru: “Please?”

“No.”

Hikaru/Kaoru: “Please?”

“They’re not going to leave you alone until you agree,” Haruhi said, coming up the stairs behind you. She raised a glass in your direction. “I wanted to see if you wanted company but I think I’m too late.”

“Haruhi, help me, I’m begging you.”

Haruhi shrugged. “Those two created an entire civil war just to see my house. They’re extremely stubborn.”

You glared at the twins. “Why do you want to see my room so badly anyway? There’s nothing exciting in there, I promise you.”

“A person’s room offers an unimpeded glimpse into that person’s life,” Hikaru said with surprising gravitas.

“It reveals things that you would never be able to learn otherwise,” Kaoru added.

“Things you don’t find in a file?” you muttered under your breath.

The twins bowed suddenly, nearly bashing you in the face. “Please let us see your room! ” they intoned in unison.

You were about to slam their skulls together when Kyoya and Tamaki came up the stairs, their conversation petering out when they saw the commotion.

Kyoya sounded just a touch suspicious. “What’s going on?” 

“We’re trying to get into their room,” the twins answered blandly. The back of your neck prickled at the way Kyoya raised his eyebrow.

“Not like that,” you said quickly.

“Ooh, can we see your room?” Tamaki looked instantly excited at the prospect.

“No.” You rubbed your eyes. “I don’t care if this is part of your recovery plan, you’re not coming into my room. Please go back downstairs.”

“If you’re feeling tired, we’d be happy to keep you company,” Tamaki said. “It’s really no problem.”

“Indeed. We came to this party mostly for your benefit,” Kyoya said.

Your eye twitched. “My benefit? The only person I invited was Haruhi. Mori and Honey get a pass because they always come to these things.”

As though summoned, the duo made their appearance. Honey was wiping a few stray crumbs from his face and blinked confusedly at the scene. “What’s going on?”

“We’re trying—” the twins said again, but you shushed them before the unfortunate sentence could escape. Somehow, Honey still understood perfectly. 

“Oh, you want to find your room? Did you forget where it is?” he asked you.

“No, I just don’t—”

“Me and Mori have been there tons of times!” Honey said with a huge smile. “It’s so much fun in there! There are so many toys and neat pictures—” Oblivious to your scowl, Honey brushed right past you and down the hall to your bedroom. At first, you stayed where you were, knowing there wasn’t much the hosts could do with your door locked. 

Then you remembered too late that Ms. Shimada had asked for the key to clean your room. You’d never relocked your room.

“Wait,” you gasped, lunging for your door. “Don’t—”

Honey pushed open your door. The lights inside turned on automatically, letting a cold rectangle of light spill out into the hall.

“See?” Honey said, still excited. “Look how cool it—oh.”

No one said anything. You didn’t have to look inside your room to know what it was that had left everyone speechless.

“Uh, are you sure this is the right room?” Haruhi asked hesitantly.

“Where is everything?” Hikaru said.

You sighed. You pushed past Kyoya and Tamaki into your room and stood in the middle of it, trying to see through the hosts’ eyes. You’d already spent too many weeks in your room to realize how off it was.

Your room was spartan. There was practically nothing in it. No drapes, no curtains, no carpets. The walls were devoid of drawings or posters or pictures. Your bed was on a boring wooden frame with blue covers and white pillows. The desk off to the side only had your laptop and a pencil cup with one pen in it. A lonely lamp sat on your nightstand, and beside that, an alarm clock.

The fact that your room was so large made it worse. It was cavernous. You could yell and your voice would probably echo.

The hosts padded cautiously inside your room, surveying it like it was a foreign country. Kyoya walked off to the side to open the door to the bathroom, and the twins flung open your closet, seeming a little shocked at how sparse it was. The only things in there were Ouran uniforms, socks, underwear, and a few t-shirts and black pants.

You crossed your arms. “There. Happy now?”

“It’s … very neat,” Tamaki said, pulling out your desk chair. He sat down on it like a bird perched to fly.

“I like it,” Haruhi said, and you couldn’t tell if she was being genuine or not.

“It didn’t look like this last time,” Honey said, peering up at the ceiling. “Did it, Taka-chan?”

Mori shook his head. His expression, as always, was inscrutable.

“I redecorated,” you said flatly.

“Why? Did you have a roach infestation?” Kaoru asked.

“I needed a change. Wanted to get rid of all the unnecessary stuff I had.”

“It looks more like you got rid of everything,” said Kyoya. You shot him a dirty look.

“There’s nothing wrong with it,” Haruhi said, taking a seat on your bed. “Minimalism, right? It works.”

You tried to smile. If only it were that simple.

Tamaki gasped suddenly, as though he’d been struck with a realization. He put a hand over his mouth and looked over at you pityingly. “You poor thing.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, and instantly regretted it.

“Your family must have been struggling financially recently,” Tamaki softly, as though you’d imparted that information to him yourself. “It happens to everyone. You were worried, so you took it upon yourself to sell all of your belongings. With your room empty, but your heart full, you presented your meagre earnings to your parents, who wept with joy at their devoted child. It was just what they needed before their finances crashed permanently into ruin. You’re still recovering, and you’ve yet to replace everything that you sold to save your family.”

You closed your eyes. You could hear Honey sniffling and Mori patting his back. 

“Great story, Boss,” Hikaru said.

“Yeah, real tearjerker,” Kaoru agreed.

“Where’d you come up with something like that?” Haruhi asked pointedly, her eyes narrowed.

Tamaki gasped. “Come up? How dare you assume I fabricated that tale! It’s completely true! How else would this room have become such a desolate wasteland?”

“Wasteland?” you repeated.

Hikaru snorted. “More like the arctic desert. There’s so much white in here.”

Kaoru hummed. “Kinda reminds me of a psych ward.”

You were about to throw the twins into a psych ward if they didn’t shut up.

“Well, you’ve seen my room,” you said. “Do whatever. I don’t care. I’m going up to the roof.”

Tamaki perked up. “Can we—”

“I’d just like to be by myself for a little bit,” you cut in, and something in your tone cut him short. You looked around at the hosts, suddenly feeling tired. “Try not to break anything.”

You left and shut the door before anyone could say anything. You went down to the end of the hall and then up another flight of stairs, to where the rooftop patio was, your favourite spot in the whole house now that your room had been stripped. Thankfully, there was no one up here, just the fairy lights and Moroccan furniture your mother had imported.

You threw yourself into one of the couches and looked out over the roof. The sky was starting to fade into night, and the city could be seen glittering faintly beyond. You inhaled, enjoying the cool air. Distantly, you could hear the party downstairs.

If you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t hate the Host Club, as short-tempered and unamused as you acted with them. If you did hate them, you would never have let them into your house to begin with. They were like a bunch of oblivious, overenthusiastic puppies. They meant well, like Haruhi had said. It was nice having people like them around, people who could make you smile and bite back laughter. Sometimes, they were enough to make you forget about him.

But then sometimes you would remember, and it would all seem trifling and stupid. It wasn’t fair to compare the Host Club to him, not when they occupied very different places in your life, but you couldn’t help it. He was suave and confident and mature and made you feel like a different person. You liked how it felt to be with him. You’d assumed he’d felt the same, but you weren’t sure of anything now, after he’d broken up with you.

You sighed a bone-deep, wearisome sigh. “I wish I could just forget,” you whispered to the air.

A few minutes later, you heard someone coming up the patio stairs. You straightened, arranged your face into something presentable. You always wore the stupidest expressions when you were thinking about him.

“Are you okay?”

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

Honey was carrying a large tray of food with impressive grace, tilting his head so he could see you from around the food. Mori was right behind him, a pitcher of water in one hand and a glass in the other.

“Are you okay?” Honey asked again, his eyes wide. “Your housekeeper let us bring up dinner for you. We hope you don’t mind.”

Bless Ms. Shimada. You reached to take the tray from Honey, a few of the dishes still steaming. You set it on the coffee table, gesturing for Mori to put down the water.

“Thanks Honey. Mori. You didn’t have to.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Honey said, plopping down next to you. Usa-chan made an appearance, and Honey rested his chin on top of the plush, looking at you expectantly. 

You smiled slightly. “Are either of you hungry? Ms. Shimada always gives me too much food. You could feed half the party with this platter.”

Mori sat in the armchair opposite you, crossing his long legs. “We didn’t mean to upset you,” he said. 

“We shouldn’t have barged in like that.” Honey hung his head. “We’re really sorry. Please don’t be mad.”

“It’s fine. It wasn’t your fault. I just came up here for some air.” 

Neither of the boys said anything else, so you took one of the bowls from the tray and slowly began eating.

Your friendship with Honey and Mori had begun when you were in junior high. You had just started getting into sports then, and before volleyball, you’d briefly considered martial arts. Your parents had taken you to one of the Haninozuka dojos, and left you to watch some of the sparring while they signed you up.

You remembered honing in on Honey immediately, even smaller than he was now, facing off with a boy twice his size. You’d expected him to get clobbered, already ready to feel sorry for him. He’d surprised you by matching the larger boy stride for stride, the two of them evenly matched. It was only later that you would learn the other boy was his cousin, Morinozuka Takashi, and that both he and Honey were martial arts masters in their own right.

Your martial arts career was short-lived, and you moved onto volleyball. But you managed to make the acquaintance of Honey and Mori and started tagging along with them after that. Maybe you weren’t the closest of friends, but you occupied a nice medium between Honey’s bubbliness and Mori’s stoicism. The two of them provided surprisingly good advice when the situation called for it.

“What happened to your room?” Honey asked tentatively. “Was it something bad?”

You couldn’t lie to Honey. Somehow, he was always able to tell.

“I threw everything out,” you admitted. “I couldn’t stand looking at it. I never bothered to redecorate.” You only had what you did because Ms. Shimada had replaced it for you. If you’d had your way, you would be sleeping on the floor.

Honey squeezed Usa-chan. “Why would you do that?”

You swallowed your bite, wondering how to explain. “You know about that trip I took to Malta? It … didn’t turn out too great. It kind of turned terrible, actually.”

“You got your heart broken,” Mori said matter-of-factly.

“Yeah. I guess I did.”

Little by little, you told Honey and Mori everything. How you’d met him, how you’d hit it off, how you’d started catching feelings. He had been easy to talk to. Had a great sense of humour and an adorable sensitive side. Both of his parents were high-ranking executives. They often came to Malta on vacation. He wanted to do government and personal relations work. He was always working on his public speaking.

Things had progressed. You’d thought about extending your vacation. You couldn’t stand the thought of leaving. He’d started to mean more to you all of a sudden.

And then, just as suddenly, he’d broken it off. Cut off all contact just a day before you were to fly back. It had been radio silence ever since. That connection you’d felt had been severed like it was nothing.

You expected Honey to start bawling or something, but he was strangely quiet when you finished. You peered at him, wondering if you’d bored him to sleep.

He was glowering, you realized. “I could hurt him,” he said darkly. A dark aura seemed to surround him and it sent chills down your spine. “No one hurts my friend and gets away with it.”

You waved off the darkness. “I appreciate that, Honey. He wouldn’t stand a chance against you. But things just didn’t work out. I’ll get over it.”

“You keep saying that,” Mori said. “Do you believe it?”

“Of course I do,” you muttered defensively. “It’ll just take some time.”

Honey brightened suddenly, looking like a miniature sun. “It’s okay! Even if you don’t want us to break all of his bones, we’ll help heal your broken heart! The Host Club is great at that kind of thing!”

“Oh, so you’ve done this before?”

“No,” said Mori. “You’re the first.”

“That’s reassuring.”

“I promise we’ll help you,” Honey said passionately. His eyes were sparkling. “You’ll get all better, and then play volleyball and be happy like you used to! Pinky promise!”

You begrudgingly linked your little finger with Honey’s. You had to try for scorn, because you could feel yourself wanting to cry again. It was terribly sweet of Honey to care that much about you. And you appreciated Mori being there to listen. You couldn’t say it felt better to air all of this out, but it lifted a weight off your chest. “Yeah, well, don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t work.”

Honey grinned. “If it doesn’t work, we’ll beat him up!”

You stifled a laugh. “Hey, you’re not going to tell all of this to the other hosts, are you? I’m telling you guys because I trust you. I can only imagine what the other hosts are going to do if they knew.”

“But—” Honey tried to protest but Mori stopped him. 

“This is your business. Who you decide to tell is entirely up to you.”

“I guess,” Honey said. “But they have to know the whole story if they’re going to help you!”

“Maybe I’ll tell them eventually. For now, I’m just not comfortable.”

Honey squished you in a hug. “I’m sorry this happened. I wish I could hug it all better.”

“Me too.” You lifted your head to look at Mori. You raised your arm. “Group hug?”

“No.”

“Well, damn. Alright.”

♡ .⁺

Earlier in your room, the hosts had been lounging around. Kyoya had opened all of the cabinets and drawers in the washroom and came up empty-handed. Hikaru and Kaoru were still flabbergasted at the state of your closet. Tamaki spun lazily in your desk chair, lost in thought. Haruhi was looking out the window—by far the most interesting thing in the room. Honey and Mori were speaking in low tones, both of their faces tense.

Everyone had expected the usual in your room. Messy clothes. An embarrassing photo or two. Some obscure figurines. They had been ready to tease you to oblivion, but somehow, this was a blow they hadn’t been expecting. 

Nothing at all to work with.

There was a knock at the door. Everyone sprang up, expecting your return. When Honey opened the door, however, it was only the housekeeper, a tray of food in her hands.

“Apologies for the interruption,” Ms. Shimada said. She peered into the room, wondering where you were. “They haven’t had dinner yet.”

“I think they went up to the roof,” Haruhi said. “They wanted to get some air.”

“I see. I’ll bring this up for them, then.”

“I can do it!” Honey said, already taking the tray out of Ms. Shimada’s hands. “Would that be okay? Me and Taka-chan wanted to talk to them!”

“I don’t see why not. They’d probably appreciate the company.” Ms. Shimada handed over the tray. “Morinozuka-san, there’s some water downstairs if you want to grab that too.”

Honey and Mori left the room. Ms. Shimada was about to leave too when Tamaki said, “If you don’t mind me asking, Shimada-san, what happened to their room?”

Ms. Shimada folded her hands in front of her. She looked more intently at your room, as though just noticing it. “Ah, well, it didn’t always look like this. It was much more lively before they … redecorated.”

“What happened?” Kyoya asked.

“I shouldn’t say.”

“Please do,” Hikaru said. He led the housekeeper into the room, and then into the desk chair when Tamaki vacated it.

“Yes, please. We’re good friends of theirs. We just wanted to know what happened. To support them,” Kaoru said. 

Ms. Shimada sighed. “They were different before the school break. Very lively. Very energetic. They were barely in the house most days. They took great pride in their room. They’re not much for art, but their room was the one thing they enjoyed decorating.” She smiled slightly. “They sometimes wouldn’t allow me to clean inside. They didn’t want me changing anything.

“But after the break, there was a clear change. They were quieter. They stopped going to a lot of their extracurriculars. I noticed they cleaned their room more often. Then they began throwing things out.

“They moved their trophies to the basement. They donated most of their clothes. And everything else … they threw out. One day when I came in to straighten up, everything was just gone. When I asked them about it, they wouldn’t give me a straight answer. They just said they thought it was time for a change. If it weren’t for me, there would be nothing in this room at all. They didn’t want to replace anything. I think they wanted it to be completely empty.”

Ms. Shimada looked down at her lap, her lips pursed. Tamaki leaned down towards her, his expression gentle. 

“Thank you for telling us, Shimada-san. We appreciate it.”

“I’m so glad they’re getting out again,” the housekeeper said. She looked around at all of the hosts. “I hope you’ll give them the encouragement they need. I know everyone would love to have their old self back.” The housekeeper smiled sadly. “I’ve known them since they were a child. They’ve never been like this before. They’ve always managed to bounce back, no matter what happened.”

The housekeeper took her leave after that. A thoughtful silence descended over the hosts.

“I mean … it’s not that unusual, is it?” Haruhi asked. “All of this?”

Kyoya gave her a long look. “You still don’t understand.”

“What is there to understand?”

The twins were leaning against the far wall, their eyes narrowed. 

“The breakup at Malta affected them a lot more than they want to admit,” Hikaru began.

“Dropping hobbies, suddenly changing their style, retreating into themselves, those are all signs of a bad breakup,” Kaoru continued. “It’s how people try to regain control.”

“Everything in their room must have reminded them of him,” Tamaki said. “They  wanted to start over.”

Haruhi wrinkled her nose. “Are you sure you guys aren’t looking too deep into this?”

Kyoya gave Haruhi a decidedly patronizing pat on the head. “You still have much to learn, Haruhi. When you’re a host for as long as we are, these things are easy to pick up on.”

“Yeah, with how much the guests are always blubbering about this stuff,” Hikaru said.

“They just love talking about breakups,” Kaoru said, rolling his eyes.

Haruhi looked around the room. “If you say so. I still feel like if the breakup was really that bad, they would’ve just said so.”

Tamaki shook his head wistfully. “If only it were that easy.”

You returned later that evening to see everyone to the door. You thanked everyone for coming, seeming a bit more withdrawn than earlier. All of the hosts left politely, keeping whatever comments they had to themselves. You looked tired. Now wasn’t the time.

As Tamaki and Kyoya headed back to Kyoya’s car, Tamaki couldn’t resist looking back, searching the windows for the light that was on in your room. His gaze lingered on it, imagining you in that cavernous room that was missing all of its life.

“It’s worse than we thought. Isn’t it, Kyoya?” he said softly.

“It would appear so,” Kyoya replied.

Chapter Text

“Why are we having another meeting?” Haruhi grumbled to herself. She stabbed her chopsticks into her bento box, irritated at having been dragged from the dining hall to Music Room 3 by the twins.

“You know I don’t call these meetings unless absolutely necessary,” Kyoya said, flipping through pages in his notebook. 

“Don’t you enjoy spending time with Daddy?” Tamaki said, making to steal a piece of egg from Haruhi’s lunch. 

“Not more than is necessary, actually.” She pointedly pushed her lunch away from him. Tamaki’s lip trembled and he sniffled as he went back to take his seat. “Why are you still so mean to me?”

“What are we waiting for? Everyone’s here,” Hikaru said, draping an arm over the back of his chair.

Honey looked up. “Actually, we’re still missing — ”

The doors of the music room opened with a theatrical bang. Who else but Renge stormed in, dressed in a long trench coat and oversized sunglasses. She tossed a manilla folder onto the table the hosts were gathered around, grabbed a tart from the plate in front of Honey, pushed Kaoru out of his seat and nearly whipped Haruhi in the face with her hair.

“Hey!” the affected parties yelled.

“Hope you weren’t thinking of starting without me,” Renge said, taking a huge bite of tart. “I haven’t been working my butt off for the past few days just to be left out.”

“Working on what, exactly?” Hikaru said, lifting up the manilla folder with a finger. Renge slapped his hand away, sliding the folder toward her.

Kyoya raised an eyebrow.“Is that what I think it is?”

Renge smirked. “It most definitely is.”

 “Do I even want to know?” Haruhi sighed.

Renge slid the sunglasses into her hair. “After countless hours of sleuthing, reaching out to my extensive network of informants and connections, and using my cognitive excellence and prowess, I have done the impossible.” Renge looked from one host to another, clearly delighting in the suspense. “I have discovered the identity of their ex.”

“Isn’t that a breach of privacy?” Haruhi began to say, but was drowned out by the other hosts.

Honey: “Who is it?”

Kyoya: “What connections do they have?”

Hikaru: “Are they hot?”

Kaoru: “Where do they live?”

Mori: “...”

Tamaki: “Well, they can’t be as charming as I am.”

Renge finished off her tart before saying, “His name is Nishio Keiji.”

The hosts stared blankly at her. “Who?”

“He’s the one who won the Young Leaders Award, isn’t he?” Mori said to Renge. “Candidates are chosen from upstanding students who display a prerogative in improving their community. Keiji was able to bring together teenagers and the elderly in his community by involving them in a documentary paralleling their experiences.”

“Mori, how do you know that?” Tamaki asked, sounding scandalized.

Mori blinked. “I watched the documentary,” he said simply. “It was well done. I just didn’t know he had history.”

“Way to steal my thunder,” Renge said, pouting. “I was going to say all of that.”

“But how did you find that out?” Haruhi said.

“Oh, backwards searching,” Hikaru said, scrolling through his phone with Kaoru. “They deleted all of their photos but this Keiji person didn’t. There are still a bunch of photos of the two of them together.”

“I thought I was the one doing the explaining!” Renge whined. By now, she was totally sidelined in favour of the hosts opening her manilla folder and going through all of her intel.

Keiji Nishio. He was indeed young and upstanding. He liked creating his own music and short films. He was an avid public speaker and lover of dogs. His parents were executives, hardworking and respectable. He was easy, casual, and very charming. Looking at the snapshots of you and him together, it wasn’t hard to see why you had fallen for him.

Tamaki grew visibly distressed. “He seems so … so…”

“Normal?” Haruhi said.

“Why don’t you try perceptive?” Kaoru said.

“Capable,” Hikaru suggested.

“Confident.”

“Striking.”

“Self-possessed.”

“He seems really nice,” Honey said, nibbling on a cookie as he spread a few photos in front of him. “How could he have broken their heart?”

“I was just about to ask that,” Kyoya said. “While all of this is invaluable, we still don’t know how they fell apart.”

“Well, I haven’t gotten to that part yet,” Renge said defensively. “This is just the background.”

“It must have been serious,” Mori said, and everyone seemed to agree.

“How is this information invaluable, exactly?” Haruhi asked. “What does knowing who their ex is do for us?”

“Now we know how to approach them,” Kyoya said. “And what we should avoid.”

Haruhi narrowed her eyes. “Are you sure? Because this just seems like you were too curious to leave it alone.”

Kyoya smiled sweetly at her. Haruhi knew him well enough to read the sarcasm in the expression.

“Well, we’ll be taking these then,” the twins said, neatly sweeping up everything on the table back into the folder.

“That’s all my hard work! What are you going to do with it?” Renge said.

“Blackmail,” the twins answered.

Haruhi gaped at them, then turned to Kyoya. He didn’t seem concerned, however, setting out his laptop on the table.

“Now to move on to the next order of business,” he said. “The Host Club’s profits aren’t where I’d like them to be, especially this far in the semester. I would like some ideas on how to generate more profit and potentially bring in new guests.”

“The Host Club isn’t doing well?” Tamaki gasped.

“Read between the lines, Boss,” Kaoru said. “If the Shadow King said we’re not doing well, it means we’re doing fine.”

“Yeah. Kyoya is just a greedy Vice President,” Hikaru said. “You know we make more money than all of the sports teams combined.”

“Not the swim team,” Kyoya said. “Which is why I’m concerned. It’s embarrassing that we’re being beaten out by a bunch of hooligans in swim trunks.” He finished whatever he was typing and looked up expectantly. “Well? Any suggestions?”

“We should have a bake sale!” Honey exclaimed.

“Too much effort. And your dentist has you on watch for another cavity.”

“Photoshoot?” Hikaru suggested. 

“After your social media debacle? No.”

“Neolithic bonfire,” Tamaki announced. For a second, everyone had to stop to just process the ludicrousy of it.

“I’ll put it under consideration,” Kyoya said, if only to prevent Tamaki from skulking off. Tamaki beamed at him.

“Banquets tend to do pretty well,” Haruhi mused. “It’s a little soon to be hosting another one, though.”

“You need something to shake things up,” Renge said. “Something unexpected.”

“We aren’t doing that already?” Haruhi said dryly.

“Something unexpected…” Tamaki said, tapping a finger against his chin. His eyes glazed over. “Something like…”

He paused. A sparkle entered his violet eyes. 

“Someone like .” 

“Someone like what?” the twins asked bluntly.

“Kyoya, what do you say to adding a new member to the club?” Tamaki said, an eager, almost manic smile lighting his face.

Kyoya was typing away on his laptop. “That’s a terrible idea.”

Tamaki’s jaw dropped. “Terrible? But it’s unexpected, isn’t it? A new face is just what the Host Club needs! We need to add more variety to our services! Like a neglected bouquet, a single bloom can reawaken notice to its surrounding flowers. Our guests are getting tired of looking at our beautiful faces!”

“There’s a reason the hosts in this club are here. We all occupy a specific type, and that already allows us to cater to a large guest base. I wouldn’t have allowed Haruhi to become a host at all except that she managed to find a different host type we hadn’t thought of.”

“There are countless types of hosts that could join our ranks,” Tamaki argued.

Kyoya looked over his glasses at him. “Yes, but none with the appeal to remain a long term host.”

Tamaki crossed his arms. “You’re being unfair.”

Kyoya sighed and closed his laptop. “Fine. I’ll humour you. Say we wanted a new host, long term or otherwise. Just who do you have in mind?”

Kaoru snapped his fingers. “Kasanoda, the Delinquent-Secretly-Soft Type.”

Hikaru grinned. “Nekozawa, the Dark-Hidden-Charm Type.”

“Oh, who’s the kid that Tamaki trained for a while?” Kaoru asked. 

“Takaoji … Shiro?” Haruhi said.

“Yeah, just bring him back,” Hikaru said. “We had a whole bunch of new guests because of him.”

Kyoya gave Tamaki an unimpressed look. “Need I say more? We’d be using more resources than we are already just to train a new host.”

“We’d be willing to help train a host if it will help the club, right, Taka-chan?” Honey said, and Mori nodded.

“You’re not thinking out of the box enough,” Renge said dismissively. “Those are all people who have been in the Host Club before.”

“Precisely,” Tamaki agreed. “I have someone very specific in mind.” He smiled beatifically at the hosts, as though expecting them to read his mind.

Surprisingly enough, they did.

♡ .⁺

You had come to associate the Hitachiin twins as the harbingers of misfortune. You couldn’t think of one good thing that could come from the two of them striding towards you. As such, you immediately turned on your heel and tried to go back the way you’d come from.

As always, the twins each clamped a hand on your shoulder.

“You’re coming with us,” they said together. 

“I’m taking a day off from the club today,” you said, backing away from them. “I mean, you’re all so busy, you shouldn’t have to deal with me all the time. You have your guests and it’d be selfish to be spending so much time—”

“Blabber all you want, but let’s go,” Hikaru (or at least who you thought was Hikaru) said. You had no choice but to go along with them, because it was easier than causing a scene in the hallways.

If you couldn’t beat them and all that.

Maybe it was just you, but the twins seemed to have a little extra pep in their step. They were excited about something, and you were sure you didn’t want to know what about. Once you were in front of Music Room 3, they pushed you in before quickly closing the doors behind them.

You were early. None of the guests had arrived yet.

“Welcome back, my dear,” Tamaki said, walking towards you with his arms raised. “We’ve been expecting you.”

You sidestepped the hug and Tamaki nearly tripped. He recovered himself with a wounded cough.

“Did I do something wrong?” you said, looking around for Haruhi, Honey and Mori. Good. They were here. You wouldn’t have to suffer this alone.

“Not at all,” Tamaki said. “In fact, we have wonderful  news for you.”

You looked around at the hosts, trying to gauge by their faces what “wonderful news” entailed. Tamaki was beaming, but when was he not? The twins looked devious as ever, and Kyoya’s face was a smooth lake. Honey was bouncing on the balls of his feet and Mori’s lips were pursed. When you glanced at Haruhi, she gave you a small, apologetic smile.

All of a sudden, Renge’s voice came from behind you, rising from her platform out of the ground. You startled, forgetting it was there.

“Starting today,” she said grandly, “you are a host.”

You stared up at Renge on her platform. Then you turned around and reached for the door handle.

“Where are you going?” Hikaru said, stepping in front of one of the doors.

“You don’t have anything to say to that?” Kaoru said, blocking the other door.

“Hell. No,” you said. You turned back around to the other hosts. “I don’t know what kind of joke this is supposed to be, but it isn’t funny. I don’t want to be a host. I don’t have any interest in that whatsoever.”

The hosts seemed surprised at your vehemence.

“You won’t even give it a try?” Honey said, widening his eyes hopefully.

“Why? You said you were going to ‘heal my broken heart.’ How is making me a host going to help that? Isn’t that your job?”

“You don’t need to know the specifics, but you are aware that the Host Club operates on payments from guests, yes?” Kyoya said. “While Tamaki was generous enough to offer our services for free, the fact remains that we need to be compensated for our time.”

You scowled. “I don’t know how many times I’ve told you that I never asked for this. You all started this yourselves. It's unfair to expect anything of me.”

“They’re right,” Haruhi said and you liked her all the better for it. “They never wanted to be a host. If they don’t want to do it, then they don’t want to do it.”

“If you’ll excuse me, I have things to do,” you said, even though there were no such things to do. The twins reluctantly stepped aside and you had just twisted the doorknob when Renge said, “You’re just afraid, aren’t you?”

“What?”
“You just don’t want to be a host because you’re afraid no one will like you. You’re scared you won’t know what to do. You just don’t want to embarrass yourself.”

Renge’s voice was high and taunting. You gritted your teeth, seeing the bait plainly and willing yourself not to take it.

“You’re just too scared that you don’t know how to flirt.”

“You think I don’t know how to flirt? ” You spun around. You couldn’t let this slide. Your pride wouldn’t allow it. “You’d be hard pressed to find someone better than me.”

“Really?” Renge said.

“Yeah, really. I’m not afraid . I can flirt and charm and swoon people just fine. Whatever you do at the Host Club isn’t hard. You just talk and smile and look pretty.”

“You think we’re pretty?” Tamaki said, but you ignored him.

Renge leaned over the railing of her platform. “I wonder if you can back up those claims.”

You scoffed. “You know what? Fine. I’ll be a host then. You just watch how well I do it, and by the end, you’ll regret making me a host because I’ll have won all of your guests over.” It was a ballsy thing to say, but you didn’t care. Renge’s goading had worked. You were all fired up now.

Renge smiled, not at you, but at Kyoya. “Told ya.”

Kyoya shrugged. He glanced at his wristwatch, then straightened out his blazer.

“We’ll open the Host Club for business, then.” He glanced at you. “I hope you won’t make too many mistakes. We are still a business at the end of the day.”

You blew out a breath through your nose. “I’m well aware.”

Chapter Text

“I’m sorry your time here wasn’t to your liking,” you said, the sheepish smile on your face now stiff. “Hopefully I can improve things for you during your next appointment.”

“I don’t know if there will be a next time,” the girl said, glancing over her shoulder. She grimaced slightly. “This just wasn’t what I was looking for.”

“I understand. Still, thank you for coming.” You bowed your head, keeping it down until the girl had left and you could let the music room doors swing shut. 

Since she was the last client, you let out the enormous groan you’d been keeping down since your first appointment.

“How did this happen,” you lamented into your hands. If you could have melted into the floor just then, you would have. Whatever dignity you had left had been trampled and beaten dead. You were barely even a human being anymore.

You felt someone softly pat your back. You couldn’t read Mori’s face, but at least it wasn’t pity. 

Even though that would be perfectly warranted.

“Today was your first day,” he said. “Don’t beat yourself up.”

You smiled weakly. “Yeah. Sure.” 

“Don’t look so sad,” Honey said, coming up beside you. He raised Usa-chan to make it seem like the bunny was giving you a pep talk. “You did a great job! Those guests were just having a bad day, that’s all!”

You patted Usa-chan’s head. “Yeah. Sure.”

“You couldn’t have expected to do great on the first day,” Haruhi said, in her signature pragmatic way. “You’ve only spent a few days in the Host Club. You know next to nothing about it.”

Haruhi’s words only had a few seconds to make you feel better before Hikaru said, “But you did great on your first day, Haruhi.”

“Better than great,” Kaoru said. “Everyone was head over heels. You were a natural. Guests even preferred you over the Boss himself. You barely needed any training at all.”

“I wasn’t that good,” Haruhi tried to say.

“Haruhi had twenty guests on her first day alone,” Hikaru said over her. “There were so many guests they had to book appointments just to come back.”

“And Haruhi wasn’t even trying,” Kaoru said slowly, as though only now remembering. “People just draped themselves all over her!”

“Are you two done?” Haruhi muttered.

“Aw, don’t cry!” Honey exclaimed, tugging on your arm. “It’s alright that you’re a terrible host!”

“Who’s crying?” Tamaki yelled from across the room, his head shooting up. “What’s wrong? Do they need a hug?”

To put it bluntly, your first day had been terrible. In your head, being a host was the easiest thing in the world. The guests were looking for mindless entertainment. Flowery words and half-lidded gazes and errant brushes of contact. They would eat up any kind of bubbly, rose-tinted nonsense you gave them.

They did not, in fact, eat up anything you gave them. Your offers of cake and tea were pointedly declined. None of your pick-up lines worked. Your smiles were met with awkward shifting. Not even your jokes, which you took great pride in, landed.

It was like all of your game had packed up its things and jumped out of the nearest French window. Amongst all of the charm and elegance of the other hosts, your awkwardness was palpable.

“I just don’t get it,” you said. “I did exactly what you guys did. Same tone and manner and speech. When you do it, it’s ‘dreamy’ and ‘charming’, but when I do it, it’s ‘unsettling’ and ‘weird.’”

Hikaru snorted. “What you were doing is nowhere near what we do.”

You threw up your hands. “What was I doing then?”

“You can’t blame everyone for being thrown off,” Renge said. For once, she didn’t rise out of the ground on her platform. “The hosts can act ridiculous because they’ve been doing that since the beginning. It’s what the guests expect and it’s what they’ve gotten used to. You’re someone completely new trying to get into their personal space and acting all lovey-dovey with them. Of course they’re not going to like it, even if you’re doing the same thing as the hosts. They have no idea who you are.”

You opened your mouth to argue, then paused.

“I hate that that makes sense,” you said.

Renge tapped her temple. “It’s not all empty up here.”

“No, or I would have sent you back to France a long time ago,” Kyoya said, but no one seemed to hear him.

“But you wanted me to be a host because I’m a new face,” you said. “What am I supposed to do?”

Everyone looked at Tamaki. He blinked, then waved his hands and said, “Well, I’ve never been very good with all of this technical host business. I don’t quite know how to explain. Why don’t we ask the Vice President?”

Everyone looked at Kyoya, who sighed.

“In order to be successful in the Host Club, you need to establish a role for yourself. A type, if you will.”

You nodded slowly. You didn’t really know why you were playing along with this. If you had been a terrible host, it gave you all the more reason to leave. There was nothing forcing you to stay right now, not when club activities were over. 

But still, you didn’t like failing. Not at flirting, of all things. “Right. That’s what you asked me about my first day here.”

“Oh, that’s right! Everyone here represents a type!” Tamak pointed at each of the points in turn. “Mori is the strong, silent type. Honey is the boy lolita. The twins are the mischievous type, Haruhi is the natural type and Kyoya is the cool type!”

“Does that make you the dumbass type?” you quipped and someone covered a snort of laughter.

“Why, I’m the princely type, of course!” Tamaki, clasping a hand to his heart. He extended the other towards you with a wink. “Couldn’t you tell?”

You smiled weakly. It had been the last thing on your mind.

“Okay. So what does that leave for me?”

Renge surprised you by grabbing your hands. She stared deep into your eyes.

“You are the Tragic Type .”

Everyone gasped. Whether in disbelief or delight, you couldn’t tell.

“Oh, that’s perfect,” Tamaki said. He wrapped an arm around you and pulled you to him. “The host too lost in their own feelings to recognize the love of others. The quiet, melancholy host who thinks themself undeserving of love.”

“The host still pining after their old love,” Kyoya said with a slightly sarcastic curl in his voice. 

“So what, you want me to go around sobbing on everyone?” you said, trying to duck under Tamaki’s arm.

“Too heavy handed!”  Renge said. “You have to be more subtle than that. You have to be slightly withdrawn and wary. Cautious of reaching out to anyone. Careful of your feelings.” She looked around the room. “You need someone to try this on.”

“I don’t think—”

“Hikaru, sit down,” Renge commanded. “Pretend you’re a guest.”

“I’m Kaoru.”

“I don’t care. Just sit down.”

Rolling his eyes, Kaoru took a seat in the nearest chair. Tamaki dragged another chair out for you and everyone watched expectantly as you perched down on it.

You looked around at the hosts, then at Kaoru. He had one leg slung over the other, his hands in his lap and the slightest lift to his eyebrows.

“Um, line?” you said.

“You’re the tragic type,” Renge hissed at you. “Act like it!”

“But what does that even mean?” Haruhi asked, and was mercilessly shushed.

You felt ridiculous, but you were already this far in. You had a feeling you knew what the hosts wanted from you. Might as well go all the way.

“So how are you today?” Kaoru began.

You took a moment to think, then ducked your head and smiled sheepishly at the floor. 

“I’m doing fine, but lately, it’s been hard to tell.”

“Why do you say that?”

You let your eyes drift briefly toward Kaoru before returning to the floor. “I guess when you’ve been sad for a long time, that starts feeling like your new normal.”

“Ooh, that was good!” Tamaki whispered.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Kaoru said, and it almost sounded like he meant it. He wasn’t a half-bad actor.

“It’s selfish of me to be feeling sorry for myself,” you said, letting your voice go low and soft. “You came here to enjoy yourself, not wallow in pity.”

“I’m not wallowing.”

“I appreciate that. You’re very kind. You remind me of someone I used to know.” You gave him a small smile. You allowed yourself to stare at him just a little too long, a touch of yearning slackening your face. When Kaoru’s eyes widened, you dropped your gaze again. “Sorry. I shouldn’t say that.”

“Who do I remind you of?”

“It was a long time ago. But sometimes I wonder …” you trailed off, looking out toward the line of windows.

“You wonder what?”

You stared at Kaoru directly. “I wonder if I’m still worthy of being loved.” You frowned. “Is that wrong of me?”

You waited for the snide remark. The bite of laughter. Kaoru was going to roll his eyes and give you sarcastic applause.

But he didn’t do any of those things. Instead, he continued to stare at you, his body motionless. There was a brush of colour along his cheeks. For a second, your stomach dropped and you swore internally. You’d overdone it. Kaoru was probably reeling from secondhand embarrassment.

“You are worthy of being loved!” Tamaki wailed. You whipped your head in his direction, watching as the hosts tried to restrain him. He broke free of them and rushed towards you, wrapping his arms around you and sobbing into your shoulder. He brought with him the scent of soft linen and flowers, and you were pleasantly surprised.

“You poor thing! Of course you’re worthy of love! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! If no one loves you, I will!”

You patted his shoulder awkwardly. “Thanks?”

Honey wrapped himself around your arm. “Me and Takashi love you too!” he blubbered. “Don’t be sad! We’ll love you forever and ever! Won’t we, Taka-chan?” 

Mori looked at you, then looked away.

You turned to everyone else. “Was I that good?”

Hikaru was staring intently at something on the floor. Renge was wiping tears from her eyes. Haruhi looked bemused and Kyoya was smiling.

“It was very well done,” Kyoya said. He went right to scribbling in his black notebook again.  “It’s like you’ve been practicing. I think the guests will be more receptive to this than what you were doing before.” As he passed you, he murmured in your ear, “We will be figuring out the logistics of how this will compensate the Host Club afterward, of course.”

You nudged at Tamaki and Honey to let you go. “Of course,” you said.

“You truly are heartbroken,” Tamaki said breathlessly. “Your performance had the ring of truth to it. Your soul cries out in agony. I don’t know how you can bear it.”

“Don’t read into it too much,” you said. “I was just doing what you guys told me to do.”

“You should consider joining the drama club,” Haruhi said. “It was really convincing. Even to me.”

You were flattered, of course, but a part of you was also worried. Had that little performance somehow relayed a part of your true feelings?

Did you really feel that miserable and wretched?

Just because of him?

The day was over after that. You would be back in Music Room 3 tomorrow as the club’s newest host. You didn’t know how you had wrangled you into it. You found that you weren’t as opposed to the idea as you would have thought.

It was mindless entertainment, you told yourself. You didn’t need to read too deeply into it. It wasn’t like there was anything else for you to do.

At the front gate, you found the twins also waiting for their chauffeur. You idled there awkwardly, not sure if you should talk briefly with them before leaving or just pretend you hadn’t noticed them.

“Wait, hold on.”

One of the twins made your decision for you by meeting you halfway. The other twin moved off, taking a call on his phone.

“About what happened back at the Host Club,” he said. This must have been Kaoru then.

“I’m fine,” you said. “I was just playing it up for the other hosts. Sorry if I made it weird for you.”

“It wasn’t weird,” Kaoru said with a small chuckle. “I just … wasn’t expecting it. You can be pretty intense when you want to be.”

“Yeah, well.”

Kaoru seemed to be having trouble deciding what he wanted to say next. His cheeks were pink again, you noticed.

“It’s okay if you weren’t acting. Not entirely, I mean. Whatever you feel, that’s entirely valid. If you ever want to talk … I mean, not that you have to talk to me, it’s just that …” Kaoru cut himself off, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“It’s just that … what?” you said.

“Nothing,” Kaoru said quickly. His face was getting more flushed by the minute. “It’s nothing. I ramble. Sorry about that. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He hurried away before you could reply, practically throwing himself into the car that had just pulled up. You caught the confused look on Hikaru’s face as Kaoru passed him. 

“I hope Kaoru told you we’re stopping by your house before class tomorrow!” Hikaru called to you, cupping his hands around his mouth. “You better be up bright and early!”

You nodded absently, waving as Hikaru slipped into the backseat and the car drove off. Then you jolted, only then registering the words.

“Wait, what?!”

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

An hour before classes started, there was a crisp knock at your door.

"Apologies for disturbing you, but there are two young men waiting downstairs for you. They said that they're friends of yours from Ouran Academy?"

You grimaced at yourself in the bathroom mirror. You had been half-hoping that Hikaru was only kidding about dropping by your house this morning but you should have known better. If they had still been waiting outside, you might have been able to slip out of your window and escape without them noticing. But if they were already inside there wasn't much you could do except meet them. You had a feeling the twins knew exactly what they were doing, because your mother would have greeted them by now and you couldn't run away without it being awkward for everyone.

Through a garble of toothpaste, you managed to call out, "Tell them I'll be right there, Shimada-san. Thanks."

You rinsed your mouth then checked over your reflection. You found yourself straightening out your shirt and wondering if you should try to find your school blazer to look less sloppy.

Wait, you thought with a scowl. Why do I care about that? Who cares about that stupid blazer?

You grabbed your book bag and hurried downstairs. You followed the sound of chatter to the kitchen, where the twins were leaning over the kitchen island as your mother poured them glasses of juice.

"They were a fantastic volleyball player," your mother was saying. "Everyone adored them as the team captain."

"What position did they play?" one of the twins asked.

"One of the offense positions. They worked very well with their setter. Their games were always very intense. They don't like to give up easily. We used to have a few pictures in the hall from when . . ." your mother trailed off when she saw you. "Oh, good morning, sweetheart! Did you sleep well?"

You raised an eyebrow. "I slept fine." The twins grinned cheerfully at you, as though they always stopped by your house before school. You only just restrained yourself from throwing them an obscene gesture.

"These two boys were nice enough to drop by to pick you up for school," your mother said, smiling. "You never told me about them. Although I do remember being at the art gathering the other night."

"I just thought it was a little soon to be thinking of them as friends," you said, and the twins side-eyed you.

"So how do you all know each other?" Your mother slid a glass of juice toward you.

"Mom, we should be getting to school."

"We met during one of our club activities," the twin you decided was Hikaru said.

"Oh, which club?"

You tried to jump in before Hikaru could scandalize your mother by revealing the Host Club. "It's nothing big. Just the—"

"Academic Debate Club, of course."

You snapped your mouth shut. Unless Kaoru had become a club president overnight, there was no such club at Ouran. Or there was, but they didn't have "Academic" hanging in front of their name.

"That sounds great," your mother said, looking between you and Kaoru. "What do you do there?"

Hikaru seemed to pick up whatever wavelength his brother was on. "It's just an informal get-together, really. A bunch of like-minded students trying to figure out solutions for the word at large."

"We are planning on meeting with a few Tokyo representatives at the end of term to try and give them some of our ideas," Kaoru continued.

Hikaru nodded sagely. "We think it's extremely important to become involved in the community, however we can."

Your mother grinned at you, then leaned over the island to kiss you on the forehead. "Aww look at you, sweetheart. I'm so proud of you."

You tried not to squirm under the attention. You didn't know what the twins were getting at but you knew you didn't like it.

"At any rate, we should get going," Hikaru said breezily. "Thank you for the juice. We hope you don't mind us dropping by so early."

"Not at all. You're both welcome here any time."

The twins said goodbye to your mother, then swept out to the front door. After finishing off your juice, you followed after them warily, ignoring the knowing look your mother gave you.

"You know I have a chauffeur too, right?" you said as Hikaru got into the car.

"Direct orders from the Boss," Hikaru said. "We were to report to your house one hour before school started."

With a sigh, you slid into the backseat beside him. Kaoru sat on your other side and the twins' chauffeur drove off a few moments later.

"What was all that with the Academic Debate Club?" you asked Kaoru.

"It wasn't like we could tell your mom you were part of the Host Club," he replied blandly.

"I guess, except that she and my dad are going to go to the academy festival and wonder why our club isn't listed anywhere."

"We thought you'd appreciate the excuse," Hikaru said, a sly undertone to his words that instantly put you on edge.

"Why?"

Hikaru feigned obliviousness. "No reason. We just thought you might have a thing for overachievers."

"Confident, self-possessed individuals," Kaoru added.

"People who know how to give back to their community."

"And are good at public speaking."

It took you a second to put two and two together.

"You . . . you know who he is?" Horror washed through your body.

The twins' expressions were nothing short of devilish.

"But how?" It was suddenly very hot inside of the car. It was one thing for the hosts to tease you about being heartsick, but it was another thing entirely for them to know about Keiji. You wanted to keep your time with him separate and distant. You couldn't have him bleeding into your life when you were trying so hard to put him in the past.

"Renge did some sleuthing. It wasn't hard to figure it out," Hikaru said.

You were going to murder her. And Kyoya. And Tamaki. And the twins, and Honey and—

The chauffeur took a turn that led away from Ouran Academy. You blinked, confused.

"Where are we going?"

"Further orders from the Boss," Kaoru said. "You need a makeover. You can't make your debut as a host looking like that."

"I'm wearing the same uniform you are."

"It's wrinkled," Hikaru sniffed. "And your tie isn't even knotted properly."

Kaoru raised an eyebrow. "Your complexion is awful and your posture is terrible. You're going to put the Host Club out of business."

"You're kidding me." You hunched into yourself. "You're forcing me to get a makeover?"

"Don't look so horrified," Hikaru said. "You should be glad we're doing this for you. We don't spend time with just anyone. It's for your own good."

"We don't have time to get anything done before school," you protested.

"We know a person. It'll be quick," Kaoru said.

"We've arrived," the twins' chauffeur announced. You followed the twins out of the car with all of the enthusiasm of a man walking to the gallows.

They led you into an upscale spa and lounge of which they were obviously regular clients. The receptionists out front greeted them by name and they started up an easy conversation with the pretty-faced attendant who came to take you upstairs.

"Will it be the usual for you two today?" she asked. She had the exact artificial smile of skin care commercials.

"Not for us," Hikaru said. "Our friend is in dire need of service."

The attendant gave you a once-over and seemed to find you lacking.

"Of course. Is there anything they have in mind?"

"Full treatment," Kaoru said. "All options. An extra fifteen-minute massage would be nice."

The attendant nodded. When you reached your floor, the attendant guided you into a reclining leather chair and dimmed the lights. Acoustic guitar played quietly from speakers and a humidifier let up something citrus smelling.

"Am I going to have to pay for this?" you said.

"It's coming out of your fee with the Host Club," Kaoru said. "Kyoya will tell you all about it."

Before you could answer, a team of attendants descended down upon you. You could hardly keep track of everything that was happening, only registering things in flashes. Someone massaging your hands. Someone slathering cleanser on your face. Another person working on your eyebags. You lay stiffly for a good ten minutes before you finally relaxed and allowed yourself to enjoy being pampered.

You felt like an airy, weightless balloon. You hadn't realized how pent up you were. You could stand to be in the Host Club a little bit longer if it meant more massages like this. You nearly drifted off to sleep when one of the twins said, "So when are you going to tell us why you and Nishio Keiji broke up?"

Your eyes snapped open. You scowled before the attendant massaging your face patted your cheek.

"Don't frown. You'll get wrinkles."

"That's none of your business," you said to the twins. You could only see the edges of them from your periphery.

"Come on. How long are you planning on keeping this from us? You know it'll come out sooner or later," Hikaru said.

"Why don't you just ask Renge if she knows so much?"

"We thought you might like a chance to tell things from your perspective," Kaoru said innocently.

You thought of Nishio's profile, his easy smile and rakish charm. You thought of how intoxicating it was to be the singular focus of his attention.

"We met in Malta. Things ended before I got back home," you said.

"Don't tell me that's it," Hikaru said. "You don't get your heart broken from a thing like that."

"It's like you guys are more hung up on my ex than I am," you snipped. "Why are you always asking about him?"

There was a pause. The attendant kept massaging your face, her fingers moving in a rippling motion that was slightly distracting.

"If we tell you the truth, you'll owe us the truth too," Kaoru said slowly.

You hesitated. Telling Mori and Honey about Nishio had been cathartic in a way, but you had known them for longer and they were just easier to talk to. Even with how much they teased you, you couldn't read the twins. There was an undercurrent of intensity to the two of them that could go either way.

You might as well find out.

"Fine," you said. "You answer first."

"Honey has told us that you're completely different from how you used to be," Hikaru said. "You didn't seem like the kind of person who let anything get to them, much less a breakup."

Karou continued. "I guess we're just curious about who could have caused such a drastic change in you. It would have to be . . ."

"Someone terrible," Hikaru finished.

"Keiji was not terrible," you said. You didn't know why you were so quick to rush to his defense. "He was great. He was funny and charming and he did everything right."

"Then what happened?" Hikaru said.

" . . . I don't know," you admitted. It sounded like defeat. "We met on the first day of my vacation. He was cute, but I noticed his voice first. It was so . . . calm. Deliberate. He knew how to tell a story. I could listen to him for hours."

The attendant left the room. You continued to lie in the chair.

"He always looked so happy when he had an audience. He always had something to share and it was like he saw everything like a movie. Everything was exciting and new and made you want to see the world the way he did. He noticed the smallest things and treated them all like they mattered. He never brushed things off. He was the complete opposite of me and I loved how he could match me stride for stride.

"I felt like I made sense with him. Like he could balance me out. Like I could balance him out. We were together almost all of the time until . . . he just stopped all contact. I don't know if it was intentional, but at some point, things just stopped. And I didn't know how to start things back up again."

"Sounds like he ghosted you," Hikaru said blandly.

"Hikaru," his brother hissed.

"What? That's what this is, isn't it? Might as well say it."

"Things might have been more complicated than that."

"The way I see it, they just liked someone a lot more than he liked them."

"Or he might have felt the same and didn't know how to show it."

You sat up from the chair. Hikaru shrugged, seeming bored with the idea already.

"You shouldn't be so quick to jump to conclusions," Kaoru said, oddly serious. "We don't know anything about Keiji. It isn't fair to say he's the villain here."

Because that was the heart of the matter, wasn't it? Nishio had broken your heart, but somehow, you couldn't bring yourself to be angry with him. You didn't know why he had done what he had. If you weren't so scared, you would ask him. If only to know.

"Thanks, Kaoru," you said. "You got it down exactly."

Surprise passed over both of the twins' faces.

"Excuse you, but I'm Kaoru," Hikaru said haughtily.

"Yeah, sure." You slid off the leather chair. "What time is it? We should get going."

"You know you can't really tell us apart," Hikaru said, fixed at your elbow as you left the spa. "Not even our own babysitter can do that."

"Who am I?" Kaoru said on your other side, pointing at himself like you were a toddler.

You raised your eyebrow at him. "You're Kaoru," you tilted your head at his brother, "and that's Hikaru."

Kaoru's mouth opened slightly. Hikaru scoffed, tossing his head. "Lucky guess."

You didn't know how to explain it exactly. Maybe you were just being more observant, or prolonged exposure to the twins' teasing had made you aware of the subtle differences between them.

Hikaru was the instigator. More impulsive and headstrong. Kaoru was milder, more sensitive and a bit more perceptive. They balanced each other out, in the way that people who spent all of their time together often did.

But you didn't say any of that, because neither you nor the twins were ones for sentimentality.

"He's right," you said with a jaunty shrug. "Lucky guess."

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

Your impromptu spa session had left you feeling surprisingly refreshed. You went through your classes with more energy than you had in days, actually answering correctly when the teacher called on you in math and earning praise when you elaborated on an enzymatic structure during science. It was nice. You hadn't realized how much you missed participating in school. Being in your element.

You guessed that was how your life was split up now. Before Malta and After Malta.

As the last bell chimed, your feet surprised you by taking you to Music Room Three without prompting. You would never admit that you were looking forward to the Host Club, but it was a nice change of pace after spending so much time at home. As you paused by the water fountain to get a drink, a tumble of conversation made you look up.

"Lobelia has a crazy training schedule. They're an all-girls school but they practice like no one's business."

"That's why I've been telling you we need to stop wasting so much time going over tactics and work more on our physical skills. There's no point doing all of that if we can't serve."

"Shut up. You're the only one who can't serve."

The sound of your volleyball team laughing sent a crash of longing through you. Sure enough, a trio of them rounded the corner, gym bags slung over their shoulder and already passing a volleyball between them. Panic shot through you, and you tried to leave before one of them said,

"Hey, it's been a while, Cap! Missed you at practice lately!"

There was no anger in your teammate's voice. Only brotherly camaraderie.

"Yeah. How are you all doing?" you said, slipping your hands into your pockets and going for a nonchalant air.

"Pretty good. This one can't serve for anything but he's working on it, right?" Your libero punched your middle blocker's shoulder.

You smiled. Your middle blocker's terrible serves were an ongoing gag in the team, even though they had improved enough to be just as good as anyone else.

"Planning on coming back to practice this week?" your setter asked gently. Technically, they were also the team captain now after you'd retreated from playing. You had sorted it out between the team and your coach and everyone had agreed to it, but you still felt guilty when you saw them. Before, you had been one of the outside hitters, and even if you weren't the best, you had been named captain for your ability to negotiate with the referee about bad calls during games. The team had gotten more than a few points from your butting heads with the ref.

You shrugged. "Maybe. I'm, uh, still not feeling a hundred percent."

Your team exchanged a glance.

"Well, get better soon," your libero said. "The season is going to be starting up soon and we don't have time to waste. Not if we want to beat Lobelia."

"We never beat Lobelia," your middle blocker muttered darkly.

Everyone chuckled at this, and you waved goodbye, making half-hearted promises to show up for next week's practices.

You felt better, but you didn't feel that much better. Volleyball had been one of your main boasts when talking to Keiji, who couldn't get into sports for the life of him. It was strange, but you didn't feel worthy about going back to the team after puffing yourself up so much. You suddenly like you had ever been that good at it.

This was why you were going to the Host Club. They never failed to distract you when you started spiralling about Keiji.

You opened the doors to Music Room 3 and nearly got a boot in the face.

"Sorry! Sorry!" Tamaki trilled. He pulled you into the room and looked you over. "Are you alright, my angel? Did I hit you?"

"You didn't get me," you said. You looked around at the trunks and chests scattered around the room, clothes and shoes and accessories spilling out of each one. "What are you doing?"

Hikaru and his brother were considering two piles of coats. "Our mom donated some prototype pieces she didn't want anymore," Hikaru answered.

"We're just looking through them to see if there's anything we can use for our later events," Tamaki said. There was a cute blue scarf tied over his hair.

"Dress-up, basically," Haruhi said. She wore an interesting plaid vest and a pair of round shades perched on her nose.

"Sounds fun," you said. You nudged a tangle of snake-like belts with your shoe. "So no hosting today?"

"We always host," Kyoya said pointedly. The table he was sitting at was conspicuously free of clothes. He kept up a constant pace on his keyboard. "We can't afford not to. The guests will be arriving in a few minutes, so I suggest you begin cleaning up now."

"You're always working," Tamaki said. He floated over and set a wide-brimmed hat over Kyoya's head. "This club is meant to be for fun. You're always forgetting that."

Kyoya looked like a very serious cowboy. "Fun. Yes, I suppose so." He seemed to notice you for the first time. "Ah, welcome back. Could you come over here, please?"

You approached him warily. Kyoya thumped a humongous manilla folder onto the table. "Here are the outlines and terms of your tenure with the Host Club. Please let me know if you have any questions."

You lifted the cover of the folder, baulking at the wall of text you saw. "What the--why is there so much? I'm just a host now, that's it."

"In a way. However, you're also a guest. I wanted to make your expectations here very clear in light of that."

"Right. Thanks." Kyoya kept looking at you. It became obvious he wasn't going to move until you took the obscenely large folder, so you slid it off the table and did your best to cram it into your book bag. You would probably ask Shimada-san to make origami with it later or something.

"I think you'd look great in this," Honey said, coming up to you with a brimmed gentlemen's hat. You stooped indulgently for him to place it on your head.

"Add this too," Kaoru said, draping a plaid overcoat over your shoulders.

"Ooh, should we add a blue tie or a green one?" Tamaki held up two ties next to your face, considering. All of the hosts, save Kyoya, leaned in to scrutinize.

"Blue," Mori said simply. Everyone hummed in agreement.

"Good eye," Tamaki said. He slung the tie over your head. You felt like an overdressed mannequin, but judging by the distant look on everyone's faces, they were seeing a much different picture. Making nefarious plans for you and this outfit, probably.

"What are you doing?" Renge demanded, slamming the music room doors open. She surveyed the mess of clothes. "The guests are going to be here in a few minutes! Clean all of this up! Quickly!"

You started putting a few of the shoes back into the trunks, but gave up when you saw the twins were just shoving everything against the far wall.

"What's the rush?" you asked Renge. Despite Kyoya's number-crunching, it wasn't as though the Host Club had a strict schedule when it came to hosting guests. Their hours were all over the place, ignoring the academy schedule entirely sometimes.

"You are," Renge said with a meaningful wink. You tried to get her to explain but of course she said nothing. You still had yet to exact revenge on her for telling everyone about Keiji.

Even though you had your "type" within the Host Club figured out, you didn't want to disrupt anything by jumping in too abruptly. So you poured yourself a cup of tea and claimed one of the tables near the French windows, resolving your expression into something melancholy and brooding. That was suitably "tragic", wasn't it?

When you weren't falling on your ass trying to please the guests, you could actually sit back and appreciate the other hosts. You would never admit it, but the hosts had a method to their airy words and dreamy gazes. They knew what they were doing. It was all a well-manicured, well-practiced display.

Tamaki clearly enjoyed playing the role of the charming prince. He was confident in his affectations, but still listened intently to everything his guests said and made sure to keep their teacups full.

Kyoya was more reserved, but not cold. He doled out a watered-down version of his snark and dry remarks, politely attentive and observant. He picked up everything the guests didn't say and had enough tact to guide them in the right direction.

The twins were whirlwinds of activity. Lopsided grins and snorts of laughter. They had a sense of humour. One that got on your nerves but other guests found very appealing. And then an unexpectedly tender side would emerge as soon as one of the twins hurt themselves and the other would come rushing to help.

Honey was earnest and adorably eager. Quick to share and put smiles on the guest's faces. His perceptiveness was surprising, but only because the guests forgot about it. He was childish in a way that made affection inevitable.

Mori was a calm, cool lake. His every movement was graceful and deliberate. His greatest appeal was the chance that you might hear him speak more than a few words, or catch the edge of a smile playing on his lips.

And Haruhi was blessedly, thankfully normal. Blunt, straightforward. What drew people toward her the most was probably her honesty, and her unassuming nature. She was humble to a fault and her smiles were quick and genuine.

It amazed you a little bit, the layers to the Host Club. It was a club for people with too much time on their hands, but the hosts clearly took pride in it. They had fun. They enjoyed what they did. Things you hadn't done since Malta.

Before Malta and After Malta.

"Have you had any guests yet?" Kyoya asked as he passed by your table. He took the seat opposite from you and was kind enough to top off your cup of tea.

You jolted guiltily. "Uh, no. I, uh, I'm probably putting on the whole tragic bit a bit strong, right?"

"I've had three different guests ask about you in the past half hour. Last time I checked in the appointment book, you have ten names booked tomorrow."

"We have an appointment book?"

"They find you very mysterious. They want to know what's brimming in those eyes when you gaze off into the distance, lost to a private daydream." Kyoya smirked, resting his chin on his hand.

You blinked. "That's a good thing, right?"

"You're putting on a very convincing act. Especially when I find myself glancing over and wondering what you're thinking about too."

"Do you really want to know?"

"When you say it like that, yes."

You smiled down at your cup. "I guess I'm just wondering why anyone would be paying attention to me when you're in the room."

From your periphery, you saw that Kyoya's face hadn't changed. He took a very deliberate sip of tea.

"That would be my next guest coming in," he said, rising a beat later. "I'll leave you to it."

You said nothing as he left, biting down a smirk. No one had come in between the time Kyoya had sat down and when he'd left. You didn't know who he was kidding.

"Excuse me, I hope I'm not bothering you. Would you like some company?"

You didn't mean to do a double take, but you couldn't help it.

"Of course. Please do."

You hurried to pull a chair out for the girl. She smiled at you and you almost fainted.

The girl sitting opposite you was stunningly pretty. Sleek ebony hair, falling in a curtain down her back. Long dark lashes and elegant eyes. Her voice like an airy nymph's, dancing along your skin. You couldn't stop staring. How had you never noticed her before?

"I hope I'm not bothering you," the girl said with a sideways smile. "I just couldn't help but be curious about the Host Club's newest host."

Tragic. You're the tragic type.

"My reputation precedes me," you said, pouring the girl a cup of tea. "Then again, I don't know why you would be interested in me when all of the other hosts are so much more appealing."

"Not at all," the girl said. Her fingertips brushed yours as you passed her the teacup. "I'm sure you have many merits of your own."

Your heart was pounding. You tried not to grin like an idiot.

"I don't think we've ever met before. May I have your name?"

"Iwaizumi Mayako," the girl answered. "We have science together, but we've never spoken."

You introduced yourself. "It's to meet you. I'm flattered that you wanted to choose me as your host."

"I usually spend time with Haruhi, but he wasn't available today."

You feigned disappointment. "Ah. So I'm your second choice."

"Not quite." Mayako grinned and you swore time stood still for a few seconds.

"I've been interested in you for a while."

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

“Thank you so much, Haruhi. You always know exactly what to say to make me feel better.”

“Of course, it was no problem at all, really.” Haruhi tilted her head and smiled. “Thank you for coming today. If anything else comes up with your friend, please let me know and I’d be happy to help however I can.”

The girl blushed and smiled to herself. She drifted out of the music room with the rest of the departing guests, all of them similarly dreamy-looking.

Haruhi ran a hand through her hair, sighing. She plucked a stray tart from one of the nearby tables and headed over to where all of the other hosts were clustered. She knew without anyone saying anything that something was up. Tamaki was peeking over an armchair with literal binoculars over his eyes, the twins peeking discreetly over his shoulder while Honey and Mori craned their necks from behind.

“What’s going on?” Haruhi tiredly.

“Haruhi! You’re finally done. Come sit next to me, quickly.”

Haruhi put the rest of the tart into her mouth and crouched next to Tamaki. Why all of the hosts were crouched behind the armchair like they were bracing for an explosion was beyond her.

“Tell me what you see,” Tamaki said, passing over the binoculars to her. Haruhi took them and peered through.

“Nothing out of the ordinary.”

“Nothing out of the ordinary, she says!” Tamaki scoffed. “Look closer.”

Haruhi frowned. “They’re just finishing up with their guest.”

“Yes, but who is the guest?” the twins whispered pointedly.

“It’s just Iwaizumi Mayako. I’ve had appointments with her a few times. She’s always perfectly nice.”

“You know, for an honours scholarship student, you can be incredibly dim-witted,” Hikaru muttered.

“Hikaru, you know it’s not polite to comment on Haruhi’s social upbringing,” Kyoya said, and Haruhi’s eye twitched. He had appeared out of nowhere, and unlike everyone else, he wasn’t crouching or whispering.

“Kyoya, keep it down!” Tamaki hissed. “They’ll hear you!”

“They’re not going to hear anything. They’ve been engaged with Mayako-san this entire time and neither one of them have looked up since they began talking.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Haruhi asked. “They’re being a good host, just like you guys wanted.”

“Yes, but not with Maya-chan,” Honey blubbered.

“I’m still missing something here.”

“What you’re missing is that the Iwaizumi family is heavily involved in politics,” Kyoya said. “They have been a fixture of the Tokyo city council for decades and regularly bring up policies and allocate funding to improve life in the city.”

“Okay . . .” 

“Maya-chan is also a great student and an amazing singer,” Honey said anxiously.

“Alright . . .”

“She was ranked one of the top ten prettiest students by the Newspaper Club,” Kaoru said.

“For two years in a row,” Hikaru added.

“I still don’t see what the problem here is,” Haruhi said flatly. “Am I supposed to be worried?”

“Yes, of course you are!” Tamaki exclaimed. “Mayako is extremely talented, beautiful and charming! She is in direct competition with the Host Club! Just think about what could happen if she ends up healing their broken heart before us!”

“That wouldn’t be a good thing?”

“Your lack of pride in the Host Club is appalling,” Tamaki scolded. “We said we would heal their heart and that is what we shall do. We cannot let anyone usurp us!” He pushed Haruhi out from behind the armchair barricade. “Go get your guest back. She cannot be allowed to spend another minute with them!”

“She’s already leaving,” Mori said, and indeed, Mayako was getting up from her seat and walking with you to the door. She said something that made you laugh, a cute, self-conscious chuckle that none of the hosts had ever heard before. You waved goodbye to Mayako, lingering for a bit at the door.

“We need to carry out damage control,” Tamaki said gravely. “ Immediately.” 

The words meant nothing to Haruhi but they apparently made perfect sense to the rest of the hosts. Like actors receiving a stage cue, they all spread out and took up various poses around the music room.

Tamaki glided over to you and leaned against the doorframe so that you would have no choice but to look up at him as you closed the door.

“How was your first day as a host?” he asked, his voice as smooth as butter.

You blinked at him. To Haruhi’s surprise, they then looked down at the ground as though flustered.

“It went pretty well, I guess.”

“Is that so? I’m glad to hear it. I hope none of the guests caused you too much trouble.” Tamaki tilted his head so his hair fell artfully into his eyes. “You would tell me if there was anything I could help you with, wouldn’t you?”

“Sure. That’s nice of you to offer.”

Tamaki smiled at you the way you smiled at something adorable. “I would do anything for you. I hope you know that.”

“Uh, thanks?”

As you were still parsing out Tamaki’s words, Kyoya appeared and led you gently by the elbow toward a nearby table.

“I thought I’d let you know that you did a wonderful job today,” Kyoya said, a thread of amazement lining his words. “I’ve never seen so many appointments reserved in advance for a host. You have everyone wrapped around your little finger.”

“Oh, I don’t think that’s—”

“No need to humble yourself. There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging your talents.” Kyoya indulgently poured out a steaming cup of tea for you as you sat down. “Anyone would be honoured to sing your praises. Myself among them.”

Suspicion filtered through Haruhi’s mind. What was going on here? This was excessive, even for the Host Club.

“How do you do it?” Kaoru wondered out loud. As though it were natural to do so, he leaned over your armchair, draping his arms over them. “You have almost everyone falling for you.”

“It’s like you have some sort of irresistible charm,” Hikaru said, perching on the arm of the chair. His fingers traced the line of your jaw. “Some kind of gravity that draws in everyone close to you.”

“You were so busy that I didn’t have a chance to share some cake with you,” Honey said, lifting up a plate with a single, perfect slice of cake. The plaintive quality in his voice could have made anyone’s heart twinge. “I thought you would always have time to have cake with me. Do you not care about me?”

“One can’t help wanting to be around you,” Mori said, his words so low as to be almost inaudible. “Your absence is all the darker for having known your smile.”

“What is going on?” Haruhi said, bewildered. Renge’s voice in her ear made her jolt in surprise.

“When a guest’s eye wanders, it is the responsibility of the Host Club to draw it back.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?” 

“Do you remember that time you were kidnapped by those fiends from Lobelia?”

Haruhi blinked. “ . . . You mean the White Lily League?”

“Mhm. Never had the Host Club been threatened in such a manner before. Of course the Host Club had to retaliate to win you back. This is just like that. The Host Club cannot stand idly by while a temptress seduces our newest host from our midst.”

“I’ve heard a lot of ridiculous things in the Host Club, but this makes the list,” Haruhi said. She gestured vaguely at the hosts still crowded around you. “You know this is just going to scare them off, right? As in, even more than they already have been.”

“Ye of little faith,” Renge said, shaking her head. “Just watch and learn.”

Haruhi reluctantly watched. And was given the pleasure of witnessing the loudest guffaw ever produced by a human being.

“What are you guys doing?” You asked, barely able to speak over your laughter. You got up from their armchair, brushing Kaoru and Hikaru off and stepping away from Tamaki’s lingering fingers. “Is this some kind of secret maneuver I haven’t learned yet?”

Renge’s jaw was on the floor. “It didn’t work?” she whispered, horrified.

“Why are you surprised?” Haruhi murmured.

“You had me going, I’m not going to lie.” You grinned broadly at everyone, no hint of the sappy, adoring admiration the hosts had been trying to cajole anywhere on your face. You pointed at Kyoya. “That’s the nicest you’ve ever been to me, and you two,” they gestured at the twins, “never say things like that unless it’s backhanded.”

“You know us too well,” the twins said together, begrudgingly amused.

“They felt threatened by Mayako so they just wanted to make sure you remembered how charming they were,” Haruhi said, coming up next to you.

“That is not what we were doing,” Tamaki huffed indignantly. “We were just . . .”

You looked expectantly at him. He had a few more false starts before he gave up.

“That might have been partly what we were doing.”

“You guys are ridiculous,” you said. You laughed again. “I don’t know how you come up with this stuff. You sure you don’t want to partner up with the Drama Club?” They snapped their fingers at Mori. “What was that back there? I’ve never heard such feeling in your voice, Mori. Nearly gave me shivers.”

Mori glanced off to the side, the barest of blushes on his face. 

“You were spending quite a bit of time with Mayako-san,” Kyoya said. “In the future, it would be preferred if you adhered to the time allotments allowed for each guest.”

“Yeah, that was my bad. I just lost track of time. I didn’t expect to get carried away like that.”

“Did you really like Maya-chan that much?” Honey asked, squeezing Usa-chan to his chest.

You hesitated for a beat. “I like her fine. We just had a lot of fun talking, that’s all.”

Haruhi could attest to that. Mayako was one of the guests she liked the best and she always couldn’t help feeling disappointed when their appointments drew to a close. Mayako was aware of her own charm but didn’t abuse it. She was almost self-deprecating about it sometimes.

Renge narrowed her eyes. “Is that so . . .?” 

“Yes, that is exactly so. It’s not like I’m going to fall in love with Mayako.”

Everyone blinked at you. You scowled. “I”m not . She’s not even my type.” 

“Not your type?” the twins echoed teasingly. “What would your type be then?”

 You grabbed your book bag from one of the tables off to the side and slipped out of the music room. “If we’re done here I’m going to get going. See everyone tomorrow.”

Haruhi was about to call it a day too when Renge said, “Gentlemen, it would appear an unexpected difficulty has arisen.”

Haruhi groaned internally. Not again.

“Indeed.” Tamaki laced his fingers together and pressed his hands against his mouth. “Healing a broken heart is becoming more difficult than we anticipated.”

“They’re not going to fall in love with Mayako,” Haruhi said. “You guys are worrying over nothing.”

“Nothing might happen on their end, but Mayako is a different story altogether,” Kyoya murmured.

“What, do you think Mayako is going to develop feelings for them? Isn’t that to be expected? You guys have over half the student body in love with you . . .” Haruhi trailed off. Her brain was offering up bits and bobs of information, and now she was starting to string them together.

“Oh.”

“This is different,” Honey said. His eyebrows were drawn together. “Mayako really likes them, doesn’t she? She has for a while.”

Now Haruhi was starting to remember. The mention of a crush had surfaced a few times during her conversations with Mayako. The other girl had been dismissive, saying they only had one class together and the other person had always been too busy to notice. Haruhi had encouraged her to speak her feelings if that was what she wanted. To at least let the other person know and see if they could give things a try. Mayako had resolved to reach out over the break, but something had come up and Mayako hadn’t had the chance.

If Mayako’s crush had been in Malta, that would certainly count as something “coming up”.

“I mean, this doesn’t have to be a bad thing,” Haruhi said. “What if they really hit it off? The Host Club could be Mayako’s wingmen or something.”

“They might end up unintentionally hurting Mayako,” Mori said. “Mayako doesn’t know about Nishio Keiji. And they might end up mistaking Mayako’s advances for normal guest interactions. They will continue to treat Mayako like a guest, and should she confess her feelings,they might hurt her by brushing her off.”

“That’s . . . very pessimistic,” said Haruhi.

“But it’ll happen,” the twins said, as though Mori had stated an indisputable law of the universe.

“And how do you two know that?”

The twins looked at each other. They both shrugged.

“Things could end up worse than they started.” Tamaki’s violet eyes were pensive. “We need to make sure both they both leave with their feelings intact.”

Haruhi frowned. “I still think there’s the possibility that nothing will happen. They can’t be that clueless. If they don’t like Mayako they can just say so.”

“They can be very clueless,” Honey said with a rueful smile. “Especially now when they’re still in a fog about Nishio Keiji.”

Chapter Text

"Hurry up! Start recording!"

"Relax, I already started. You're going to make me drop my phone."

Keiji grinned. His hair was wind-tousled and he squinted his eyes against the sun. There was sand all over his swim trunks and long legs.

"Don't miss anything!" he cried, running back into the sea. The video panned so that an immense sand castle came into view. It was marvellously made, with towers that rose nearly to your knees.

"Okay, run in now!"

Keiji scrambled toward the sand castle, almost falling over himself as he splashed through the approaching wave. Just as the wave broke against the sand, he leapt over the sand castle and the surf swept out the castle from beneath him. He landed, but not quite, slipping onto his backside.

You hooted with laughter, the video blurring as you ran toward Keiji. He yanked on your leg, sending you toppling on top of him.

"Hey! Jerk!"

The video caught a spray of sand. Your muffled laughter getting cut off as offscreen, Keiji kissed you.

The video ended there, but you remembered what happened. Keiji had tugged you up and then out into the sea, splashing water at you and cackling as the salt stung your eyes. You'd followed him out as deep as the coast guard allowed, and then floated on your backs, the waves calmer this far out. You'd found his fingers and he'd squeezed yours in return. You had never heard him laugh as much as you had that day. It was a wonderful laugh. Full-bodied and brimming with joy. Even now, listening to it, your mouth fought to tug up in a smile.

Maybe that was when you realized you were in love with him. That day full of salt and sun and sea, Keiji's laugh tying it all together.

"There were no phones in the 1800's!"

Renge snatched up your phone with demonic speed. You yelped, scrambling to get it back, but she was too quick, flitting out of your way as she peered at the video you had been watching.

"Oh, is this Keiji?" she asked innocently. You heard his laughter over the video and your stomach tightened. "He's attractive, I'll give you that."

"Give me my phone back," you gritted out.

"He has a nice physique," Renge noted. "His biceps are killer."

"I'll show you a killer," you groused, lunging for your phone. You almost fell on your face as Renge deftly wove out of your way. How did she move so fast in that humongous gown?

You were currently both dressed in Victorian-era attire, Renge in an off-the shoulder velvet number and yourself in a flowy white shirt and waistcoat. The blue ribbon the hosts had picked out the other day was knotted about your throat. All of this in the name of the Host Club's Victorian Tea Party, hosted on Ouran's lawns under the gentle afternoon sun. Cute little tables were spread out over the green and Tamaki had even taken pains to import over a few horses from France, in case a leisurely trot was on anyone's agenda.

You had been directed to sit under the shade of a few trees and to look brooding and mysterious as you flipped through a hardcover. But you had gotten bored of that and started discreetly looking through your phone instead. Earlier, Kyoya had hounded everyone's phones and locked them in the music room. It was only because you'd distracted him with fake questions about your obscene host folder that he hadn't taken your phone too.

You had thought you had deleted everything relating to Keiji. Somehow, this video was still in your storage, probably because the thumbnail had been a blur of sand and hadn't included Keiji's face. The right thing to do would've been to delete the video as soon as you'd heard Keiji's voice, but just like with his social media profile, you had to watch it one last time.

To your embarrassment, you had looped the video a few times now.

"Ooh, someone has their phone still on them," Hikaru called from across the lawn.

"Renge, give me my phone back," you hissed.

"It's not mine!" Renge called back. "You guys want to see a video of Nishio Keiji?"

"Renge!"

The twins didn't need to be told twice. They dashed over, the only thing marking their ensemble apart being their different coloured ascots. Both were dressed in royal-blue suits, actual kidskin gloves covering their hands.

"Woah, check out Keiji in the swim trunks," Hikaru crowed, taking the phone from Renge. "He's got some legs."

Kaoru craned his neck to get a look at the video, but your glower must have been singeing the air because he said, "Guys, that's enough. Give them their phone back."

"He's got nice hair," Hikaru said, ignoring his brother. "Renge, he's got nice hair, doesn't he?"

"Extremely nice," Renge agreed. "The wind-swept wave is amazing."

You should have just given up your phone to Kyoya when he'd asked.

"Whoever you're talking about, they can't have nicer hair than me."

Tamaki swept out from one of the horse carriages passing by. Admittedly, he pulled off a top-hat very well, but you'd be dead before you told him that out loud.

His jaw dropped when Hikaru passed over your phone. "Is that Keiji?"

"I thought you all knew what he looked like already," you deadpanned.

"Yes, but it's different when he's candid." Tamaki brought a hand to his mouth and studied your phone intensely. "He does have great hair. And that smile . . . I should take notes."

"I thought I told you to leave your phone in the music room," Kyoya said, because he was never far from where misery was concentrated. A dark overcoat and grey-plaid trousers made up his look today, and he leaned on his walking stick to look at your phone.

Kyoya blinked. "Your ex is quite attractive."

"I don't understand how you guys admiring Keiji is supposed to help me get over him."

"Are you guys looking at Nishio Keiji? Can we see too?"

Mori and Honey came into view, Honey dressed in the funny shorts and ruffled shirts favoured by young aristocrats and Mori in a pinstripe waistcoat and boots. You shrugged in defeat, and Honey tugged on Tamaki's arm to get him to lower the phone to his eye level.

"Ooh," Honey said, as though he were looking at a triple-tiered cake instead of a person. Mori said nothing, but his eyebrows rose toward his hairline.

"Like I said before, you guys have already seen him," you said.

"That was looking at him from a purely objective standpoint," Renge said dismissively. "We were analyzing his standing then, and the technicalities of why you two got together."

"You know, if we really want to know how attractive Keiji is, we have to ask Haruhi," Hikaru said. He raised his voice to shout, "Haruhi! Come over here! We need your professional opinion on something!"

At any other time, you would have complimented how put-together Haruhi looked, especially with the golden chain threaded across the front of her maroon waistcoat. Now though, you only grimaced at her as she came jogging toward you.

"What's up?"

"What do you think of this guy?" Hikaru asked, raising Tamaki's arm with your phone. "Hot or not?"

"Why are you guys watching a video of Nishio Keiji?"

"That's what I've been asking," you muttered.

"We should really give them their phone back," Kaoru tried again, but Hikaru elbowed him.

"Just answer the question," he said to Haruhi.

Haruhi shot you a look, then peered at your phone. She squinted.

"He's alright. He has nice hair."

"Yes! I knew it!" Renge and Hikaru high-fived.

You said, "You know what Keiji looks like now, great. Can we get back to hosting now?"

"Don't be mad. We kind of owe Keiji a debt if you think about it," Hikaru said.

"How?"

"If Keiji hadn't broken your heart, you wouldn't have come with me and Taka-chan to the Host Club, and then you never would have met everyone and never become a host and never have spent time with us," Honey said plainly.

You stared at him. Everyone else did too.

"I was just going to say if Keiji hadn't broken up with you, we wouldn't have been able to make fun of your misery, but yeah, that too," Hikaru said.

"In a roundabout way, what Honey said was kind of sweet," Haruhi said.

"Yeah, I guess it was." You looked off into the distance the way you'd seen Tamaki do a few times and let out a wistful laugh. "Sometimes I get so caught up in the memory of what was that I forget how lucky I am in the present."

Now everyone stared at you. You let the moment hang for a few more seconds before you snorted.

"Relax. I'm kidding." You took your phone from Tamaki's fingers and stuffed it into your pocket.

"The guests are here. Look alive."

♡ .⁺

This would be the fourth or fifth time Mayako had requested you. Keeping Kyoya's words in mind, you had made sure your appointments with her didn't go on for too long, regretfully cutting conversations with her short. Thankfully, Mayako seemed to understand, and was only too happy to continue your conversations when you next met.

With every appointment you had together, the gaps in your mind about Mayako slowly started filling in. She was an only child. She loved to sing. Her parents were involved in business and politics but Mayako wasn't sure that she wanted to follow those paths yet. She hated science but loved English. She liked movies that made her cry.

She had never been in a relationship before.

As you talked to Mayako, there were multiple times when you nearly mentioned Keiji. Not that there would have been anything wrong with that, but it just didn't seem right to bring him into things. Mayako was just easy to talk to. You liked the attentive look on her face whenever you spoke, how she was never distracted by anything else.

Today, you were unfortunately the opposite. You were very distracted. A little bit about Keiji, but mostly about what Honey had said. It was true that you probably would never have gotten involved with the Host Club if it hadn't been for the breakup. The question flip-flopped inside your mind: whether it was a good or bad thing that you had met the Host Club. On the one hand, they were obnoxious and insufferable and caused you endless grief. But on the other hand, they were funny and surprisingly caring. At the heart of all of their tomfoolery about your "broken heart" they genuinely wanted you to be happy. The fact that they were still chugging away at healing your heart and hadn't gotten bored yet . . .

You didn't really know what that meant. Maybe you were looking into it too much.

All of a sudden, Mayako cut herself off mid-sentence. Guiltily, you realized you hadn't heard her past few sentences at all.

"Do you mind if we go somewhere a little more private?" she asked.

You looked around. "Well, it's pretty private here already." All of the tables around yours were empty. Everyone was probably lining up for the carriage rides.

"Oh, right. I guess it is." Mayako lowered her face, colour rising to her cheeks.

"Is everything alright?"

"I don't really know how to say this."

Your stomach lurched. "You don't have to rush. Just take your time."

Mayako furrowed her brow. Your hands were beginning to sweat. You didn't like how tense the air felt right around you.

"I . . . I have feelings for you."

"You—you do?" No, you don't. That's stupid. How could anyone possibly like me right now?"

"I've liked you for a while now," Mayako said, all in a rush. She couldn't meet your gaze. "Since last year, but I was too afraid to tell you. I planned on telling you before the break, but then you left for Malta and there wasn't a chance."

You didn't know how to react. Mayako had liked you for that long? Before Malta? What would have happened if she had told you before you'd left?

She's staring at you. Say something. Don't just leave her hanging.

You cleared your throat. What was Host Club protocol for situations like this? Were you supposed to play it cool? Reciprocate? Play up your "Tragic Type" persona? The obscene manilla folder from Kyoya probably told you.

"Mayako, I think it's really sweet that you were able to tell me all of this—"

A scream wrenched through the air. You and Mayako both whipped your heads toward the sound.

"Honey-senpai is going to die!" somebody wailed.

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

You were out of your seat immediately. Without looking back for Mayako, you sprinted across the lawn toward where the commotion was.

Your brain scrambled to make sense of the scene. Splinters of wood littered the grass. Nearby, a few of the French grooms that had come with the horses were helping a few guests out of a toppled carriage.

"What happened?" you asked the person closest to you—Haruhi.

"I'm not sure," she replied. "Honey was with one of the guests in the carriage. Something must have happened—the carriage detached and the horse ran off."

"Is everyone okay? Where's Honey?" you asked, trying to make him out amongst the overturned carriage.

"What are you guys standing around for? Come on, hurry!" Kaoru tugged urgently at your sleeve and you and Haruhi ran after the twins.

"What's going on? What are we chasing?"

"Honey leapt onto the back of the horse for some reason," Hikaru said. "I think he was trying to be heroic or something. Then it carried him off and he had no idea how to control it."

You baulked. "So we're chasing after a horse? What are we supposed to do about that?"

"I don't know, but we can't lose Honey," Kaoru said.

Up ahead, you could make out the sound of hooves striking the ground. Sure enough, there was Honey, hanging on for dear life as the horse galloped to who-knew-where.

"Help me!" he wailed. "I tried feeding the horse some cake but he didn't like it!"

You braced yourself on your knees as the horse started pacing around in angry circles. It tossed its head a few times, and you were afraid it might try to buck Honey off.

"Where's Kyoya and Tamaki?" Haruhi asked.

"I don't know how those two are supposed to help," you said. "We need one of the grooms to—"

"Fear not, Honey! The King of the Host Club is here to rescue you!"

As though he had been summoned, Tamaki stepped out from the line of trees, brandishing what looked to be one of the tablecloths from the tea party in front of him. He waved it in front of him in a grand flourish, and you belatedly realized it was meant to resemble the red cloths that bullfighters used.

"Tamaki, that's not going to work!" you shouted. "Get back before you get run over!"

"You have no need to worry!" Tamaki called back. He snapped the tablecloth close to his body. "I would gladly lay down my life to save someone in mortal peril."

You gawked at him. Most of the guests from the tea party had trickled closer to the action by now, and they stood a distance away, murmuring to themselves. You expected them to be cursing Tamaki's idiocy but instead, they were all awe-struck.

"Tamaki-san is so brave!"

"He just cares so much about Honey! Oh, I could faint!"

"Look at how gallant he looks! Like a knight from a fairytale!"

Their brainless adoration actually hurt your soul a little bit.

"Are you guys not worried about this?" you asked Haruhi and the twins. "Shouldn't we do something?"

"The Boss will do what the Boss will do," Hikaru said sagely, and his brother nodded. You turned to Haruhi, who shrugged.

"He's probably just trying to keep everyone from worrying until the grooms get over here."

That was nice of Tamaki, except that Honey was a very far distance from the ground and the horse was starting to look more and more pissed-off.

"Release Honey at once, errant steed!" Tamaki flourished the tablecloth in an arc before him. The horse paused in its pacing, snorting.

"Tamaki, I'm scared," Honey cried. "I want to get down!"

"And so you shall. Come and face me, ill-begotten stallion. Or do you fear your defeat by my hand?"

You actually heard swooning behind you. The horse flicked its ears. It couldn't really have been listening to Tamaki, could it?

Where are those damn horse handlers?

"Come and face me!" Tamaki called grandly. And to your horror, the horse charged.

Tamaki just stood there, an arrogant grin on his face. You could hardly believe it. Was he really just going to stand there? Who did he think was going to win in this situation?

You weren't really sure what you planned on doing. All you knew was that your heart leapt into your throat and you charged toward Tamaki. He turned toward you, his eyes wide.

"Don't—"

It happened all at once. Someone grabbed the back of your waistcoat and yanked you backwards. Tamaki leapt in the opposite direction. The horse charged forward. The guests gasped.

You squeezed your eyes shut. Please let everyone be alright. Please. Please.

There was a smattering of applause. Confused, you looked up to see that the horse was now being led away by the handlers. Honey was safely on the ground, surrounded by a gaggle of tearful girls.

You felt someone's ragged breathing at your back. You looked over your shoulder to find Mori's chest heaving, his face uncharacteristically dark.

"What were you doing?" he said sharply. "You could have been seriously hurt, do you realize that?"

Mori had been the one to grab you. His hand was still on your back. A part of you was grateful he'd saved you from getting trampled but the other part was rankled by his tone.

"Tamaki was just standing there. I was trying to get him out of the way."

"He knew what he was doing."

"Did he? Because it seemed like he and Honey were headed toward an early grave."

"You would've been the only one hurt if I hadn't pulled you back."

You opened your mouth to argue, but someone cut you off.

"What do you think you were doing?"

Kyoya was scowling. You thought you had seen him angry before but this was something else.

"Why does everyone keep asking me that? Tamaki was about to get trampled so I just tried to help him! Who even let him do that stupid bullfighting thing anyway? The handlers should have been the ones going after Honey!"

"That was all planned," Kyoya snapped. "If you hadn't been so preoccupied with your phone, you would have been listening to me while I went through today's agenda. Tamaki and I made sure to ask the handlers and Honey if something like this was safe to do. We thought it would be an entertaining spectacle for the guests. All of the horses here are extensively trained. Nothing would have happened to anybody, but you leaping in front of a charging horse is another matter entirely!"

You were momentarily speechless. "But-but Haruhi and the twins didn't know what was going on."

"Everyone knew what was going on," Mori said tightly. "We were all supposed to play along to make it seem more authentic."

Hot embarrassment roiled through you. But more than that, you were pissed off.

"You know, a little heads-up would have been nice. Can you really blame me for freaking out? Who even plans something like this in the first place?"

"Everything would have been fine if you had just listened," Kyoya said coldly. "What if Mori hadn't been there to stop you? You could have been seriously hurt."

"But that's not my fault! I was trying to help!"

"Are you alright?" Tamaki came up to you then. He was a little dusty, but otherwise perfectly fine. "What were you doing? Why did you just jump in front of the horse like that? Did you forget about our plan?"

"They weren't even listening to the plan," Kyoya sniped.

Surprise flashed in Tamaki's eyes. "What? Why not? I thought we were all on board with this."

"I don't know why everyone is getting so upset. For the last time, I was just trying to help."

"As a member of the Host Club, you should be more aware of what's going on. Especially when we have events like these," Mori said.

"We're trying to do the best we can for our guests, but that only works when everyone is on the same page," Tamaki said, a touch gentler than Mori.

Kyoya was still scowling. "This is what you agreed to when you joined the club."

"I didn't join this club!" You tried to keep your voice down but it was almost impossible. "You forced me into this. And that was only after you wanted to 'heal my broken heart' or whatever it was!"

"No one is forcing you to do anything," Kyoya said. "You can back out at any time. If you're here, that means you want to be a host. In that case, I don't understand why you can't follow instructions and plans when we give them to you."

You wanted to argue; the words scraped against the back of your throat like hot coals. But you also didn't want to say something you regret.

You sighed. "I'm going home."

Tamaki frowned. "We should—"

"Look, I'm upset and I'm not thinking straight. Can we just talk about this tomorrow? I'm sorry, but I don't want to make a spectacle in front of the guests."

It was only then that the three hosts seemed to remember where they were and the guests still watching them. They all straightened, tucking away this conversation into somewhere private.

"Tomorrow then," Tamaki said. He looked at Mori and Kyoya, and his mouth thinned into a line. "Get home safely."

You nodded. You didn't say anything else as you left, and maybe to your disappointment, neither did any of the hosts.

You felt everyone's stares on you as you headed back into the school. There were murmurs, slightly curious and slightly concerned. You quickened your pace, not wanting anyone to stop you.

Just as you were going back into the school, someone called your name.

"Are you alright? What happened back there?"

You turned, catching Mayako's eye as she ran towards you. In all of the commotion, you had forgotten about her confession, and seeing her now, heat rose to your face.

"That was terrifying, the way you just jumped in front of Tamaki-san like that," Mayako said, slightly breathless. "Didn't you realize you could have gotten hurt?"

"I guess it didn't occur to me. In the moment, it didn't really seem like anything would happen to me." It was easier to slip back into the meek, tragic host role than tell Mayako how you really felt. You didn't need everyone telling you how reckless you were. It wasn't like you jumped in front of horses for the hell of it. You just hadn't wanted Tamaki to get hurt.

Mayako's gaze softened. "You're so self-deprecating. You don't realize how much everyone cares about you. That's why all of the hosts were harsh with you. It's like nothing can get through to you."

You shrugged. "I let one person get through to me and it didn't end so well."

"Not everyone is like that. I-I wouldn't be like that."

I've liked you for a while now. Ever since last year, but I was too afraid to tell you.

You swallowed. "I'm sorry, but I have to get going now."

Mayako blinked. "Oh yes, of course. Don't let me keep you. But you'll think about what I said, right?"

The hesitance in your voice was genuine when you said, "I don't want to disappoint you, Mayako."

She smiled. "You won't. I'm just glad you know now."

Your throat tightened. Why did she have to be nice? "Thank you for today, Mayako. Have a good evening." You bowed slightly in her direction.

"You as well."

♡ .⁺

"Wow, you're really settling into your Tragic Type persona, huh?"

You looked up and smiled sheepishly at Haruhi. Behind her, Honey was balancing a tray of sweets piled nearly as tall as he was.

"Mind if we sit?" she asked, and you shook your head, honestly a little grateful to have company.

"You're not going to spend lunch with the rest of the Host Club?" you asked. Not that you wanted them to. You knew how miserable you looked, slouched at a table in the dining hall all by yourself. You were embodying the Tragic Type without even trying.

"You're part of the Host Club too," Honey said. He passed you over an egg tart, and you accepted, your stomach suddenly growling after having skipped breakfast.

"I'm guessing everyone's still mad at me?" you said weakly. Haruhi hummed, unwrapping her homemade bento.

"I don't think they were ever really mad at you. Just worried. Anyone would have been."

You sighed. "I get why they got upset. I was being reckless and I should have thought twice. But Tamaki looked like he was in trouble, and that was all I could think about."

"You've always been like that," Honey said, placing his cupcakes in front of him in a line. "You do things first and ask questions later. That's why you were such a good volleyball player."

"To be fair, the others are at fault too," Haruhi said. "It was a brave thing you did yesterday. You were just trying to help. I'm always telling them they should make their plans more clear. Sometimes I don't even know what's going on."

"Haruhi had an incident like yours once too," Honey said. "She had a big fight with Tamaki over it."

"Really? What happened?"

Haruhi smiled ruefully. "I bit off more than I could chew. We spent a day out on the beach one day. There were a bunch of older guys harassing some of the girls. I tried to get involved, but it was pretty obvious things wouldn't have gone well. Tamaki and the others intervened before anything bad could happen but they hated that I tried to do something. They said I should've known I couldn't do anything. That I shouldn't forget I was still just a girl."

You whistled. "That's some bullshit."

"Yeah. Thankfully, they came around though. Sometimes the hosts take things a step too far. They forget their brand of chivalry isn't for everyone." Haruhi smiled at you and you could've sworn your heart melted a little. "At the end of the day, you were trying to help. The hosts will see that in time."

"Thanks. I appreciate that, Haruhi, I really do." You turned to Honey. "But seriously, telling me about you getting carried off by a horse beforehand was the least you could have done."

He grinned at you, sprinkles stuck to the sides of his mouth. "If you hadn't been distracted by your phone, you probably would have known!"

"Again with that? You guys were the ones who were distracted. I didn't even make it that big of a deal."

"Are you still hung up on Keiji?" Haruhi asked. "I'm surprised at you."

You felt your hackles raising. "And why is that?"

Haruhi and Honey exchanged a look.

"No reason," Haruhi said, much too casually. "It's just that I figured that spending so much time with the hosts ... I don't know. I guess I thought Keiji would be the last person you'd be thinking about."

Haruhi let you chew on that. For the first few minutes, you couldn't quite pin down what Haruhi meant, but when you did, your half-finished egg tart fell out of your hand.

Honey gasped, probably more concerned about the tart than you. "What's wrong? Are you alright?!"

"Fine," you said, hurriedly scooping up the tart and it crumbs. It felt like all of the blood had left your head. You suddenly felt dizzy. Disoriented.

Haruhi continued eating her bento, seemingly oblivious to the bombshell her words had delivered.

Maybe you were wrong and maybe you were jumping to conclusions, but could it have been that you had been thinking about the Host Club and their treatment of your broken heart all wrong?

Could it be that they meant to heal your heart—

—by making you fall in love with them?

♡ .⁺

Chapter Text

You thought it would be best to avoid the Host Club today, especially considering your failed attempt at hero yesterday and Haruhi’s groundbreaking revelation at lunch. You couldn’t deal with them today, so you would just spend your afternoon with people who didn’t make you think about relationships and your love life.

“You’re hella sloppy, Captain,” your libero said as yet another one of your serves went off court.

“It’s not like I’m doing it on purpose,” you groused. Your libero tossed up a ball and you tried to serve that one with even less success. Seeing it go in the exact opposite direction you’d intended was a physical wound.

“Coach is going to kick you off the team at this point,” your libero said. The words didn't even hurt because you knew they were true. In fact, it was lucky today was only an informal practice or the coach would be giving you an earful right now. 

Actual practice started next week and your first game was a month and a half from now. You'd have to pick up your slack and pick it up soon.

“I just want to play a game,” you said, moving to the back of the relay line. “It's been way too long.”

“We'll be getting to that,” your setter said, sending a ball in a perfect arc to your middle blocker. “Just waiting up for the other team.”

“Really?” It was a little early in the season to be calling other schools over to practice. Sometimes the basketball team was willing to play a game or two but they could hardly be considered practice.

“Sorry we're late! Hope you weren't waiting for too long.”

You turned eagerly to the door of the gym only to draw up short. 

“No problem,” your setter said. “Just dump your stuff by the corner over there and we can get started.”

You waited for someone to burst out laughing, but your team just chucked the practice balls into a basket, talking easily among themselves.

Was this for real? What the hell was the Host Club doing here? Why was everyone acting like they knew even the first thing about volleyball?

You shuffled over to where the Host Club was depositing their things. Whatever lie they had concocted to get in here, you doubted your volleyball team would have thought to check up on them. They probably would have no idea what the Host Club even was besides the ludicrous stories that sometimes floated around. Certainly not any club willing to help with practice.

“What are you doing here?” you asked Tamaki. You tried your best to make your tone curious instead of accusatory.

“One of our club members is practicing volleyball, so I figured we could stop by to help,” Tamaki said with a sweet smile. Your stomach swooped, trying to read if the expression was a flirtation or just kindness.

“You guys know how to play?”

“No, but it can’t be that hard to learn,” Hikaru said from your left.

“Yeah, how hard could it be?” Kaoru added.

You took in all of the hosts, wondering where they had managed to find coordinated tracksuits. It wasn’t like any of the actual volleyball team were in their jerseys. You yourself had thrown on the first pair of shorts and t-shirt you’d found in your closet.

“If they ask, we’re part of the track team,” Kaoru said, noticing you studying him.

“Kyoya really let you guys come? He’s not worried about you all losing money?”

“We aren’t losing money,” the Shadow King said, because even indirectly mentioning him summoned his presence. “We’ve invited our usual guests to watch today’s practice.”

“Wait, you guys shouldn’t—”

It was too late. You hadn’t noticed Renge by the door, but now she threw open the gymnasium doors, waving the crowd of guests who had been waiting outside to take their place on the benchers. Your team looked up, surprised at the sudden burst of activity.

“I didn’t know we were going to have an audience,” your middle blocker remarked, his neck starting to get red.

“That won’t be a problem, will it?” Kyoya asked.

“I guess not,” your setter said. “It’s not like these practices are private.”

You sighed. “Hey, do you mind if I talk to the track team for a second?”

He shrugged. You looped one arm around Tamaki’s and the other around Kyoya and pulled them to the corner of the gym. Sure enough, the rest of the hosts followed a beat later.

“Look, I don’t know what you guys are doing here but I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry about yesterday,” you said. “I get that I was reckless and that I should have been paying more attention to club instructions. If things didn’t turn out the way they did, a lot more people than just me could have gotten hurt.” You took in a breath. “But at the same time, I still think I deserve some credit for at least trying to help Tamaki, even if I didn’t know what the hell was going on.”

Tamaki, Kyoya and Mori looked at each other.

“We should apologize too,” Tamaki said. He bowed his head. “I appreciated that you weren’t willing to let me get trampled by a horse.”

“I lost my temper. I apologize,” Kyoya said deliberately. “I was afraid that something had happened to you. That’s the last thing I wanted.”

Mori was silent for a beat. “I thought you were being stubborn on purpose, but what you did yesterday was quite honourable. I probably would have done the same in your position.”

You nodded and smiled ruefully. “I think we should all just be glad that no one got hurt.”

“Agreed.”

The hosts kept looking at you. Tamaki was sheepish; Kyoya was expectant; Mori was thoughtful. It was impossible not to read into the silence; to wonder if there was some ulterior motive to the way they were looking at you now.

“Let’s get playing then,” you said, forcing yourself to look away. “If you’re here to play volleyball, you better do it.”

Because your team weren’t total sadists, you split in two and added the Host Club to either team to make things more fair. Honey was relegated to the scoreboard, where the guests cooed at how adorable he looked perched up on the stool. Kyoya could not stand to be undignified in any way, and so had taken up the coach’s station. Kaoru and Tamaki were on the other side with the majority of your team. Hikaru, Haruhi, and Mori ended up on your team with your libero. Renge took it upon herself to stir the guests’ into a frenzy with her impromptu chants and banner-waving.

The Host Club was predictably terrible at volleyball. To their credit, what they lacked in skill they more than made up for in enthusiasm. They didn’t shy away from the ball and even if their form was abysmal, they were at least able to get the ball up over the night. More often than not though, your team just ended up playing around the hosts.

Although your team was at the disadvantage, you were surprised at how well Haruhi was able to keep up. For someone with no prior volleyball experience, she wasn’t half bad. And Mori was tall enough to make a semi-decent blocker no matter what he did. Hikaru, if nothing else, could be relied on to make that first contact with the ball after it was served to keep it up in the air, after which you would set to your libero to return to the other team or vice versa.

Throughout the game, you had a nagging suspicion that Kyoya had played volleyball before, or at least had some rudimentary knowledge of it. He was able to call a point each time one was earned and even without anyone prompting, could call out fouls when they happened. Of course he would feign inexperience only to turn out to be a pretty good referee.

Of course.

For a while, you could almost imagine it was a real game you were playing in. The cheers every time a point was earned definitely helped. Everything else fled your head and there was only the ball in the air, the shuffle of feet, and leaping up to meet the ball.

And then your team reached set point. Surprising, but like it always did, seeing Honey flip the scoreboard from 23 to 24 was like lighting a fire under your ass. A burst of red-hot energy coursed through you.

“Only one point left,” you yelled, more for the hosts’ benefit than any of the volleyball team. “We can do this, guys, come on!”

Everyone was breathing hard, sweat darkening the neck of their shirts and dripping down their faces. You didn’t  think you had ever seen the hosts physically exert themselves before, but judging from the fanatic cheering and screaming from the bleachers, the guests were eating the sight right up.

You internally cheered that it was your libero’s turn to serve. Their serves were erratic but explosive. If they were smart, they would aim at either Kaoru or Tamaki, forcing the other team to return a weak ball. From there, you’d dart forward, set the ball and your libero would score the point.

You shot a glance at your libero, hoping they would catch all of your thoughts. They grinned in response, and you took that to mean they understood.

Kyoya blew the whistle. Your libero sent the ball across the court in a high-speed arc. 

Yes! You grinned, watching it sail directly into Tamaki’s path. He looked up, surprised, and threw up his hands to keep it from smashing into his face.

The ball went even further back on their side. “Oh hell,” your setter growled, scrambling to get under the ball and give your outside hitter a proper set. 

“Mine!” your libero called, already in position to receive the ball. Your outside hitter returned the ball a little harder than expected, though, and it went over your libero’s head.

“Haruhi!” you shouted, already running over. You didn’t think she’d be able to get the ball, but she sank into a crouch and bumped the ball perfectly.

“Nice receive!” you crowed. You switched directions, repositioning yourself to set the ball.

You heard someone’s foot slip and they went down hard. Oh hell. Was that your libero? You were already in the air, fingers on the ball. You didn’t have time to redirect—

All of a sudden, Mori was there, making eye contact with you. You let the ball fly, your heart in your throat as you watched Mori propel himself upward, his arm drawn back.

The ball landed on the opposite end of the court so quickly no one even registered it. They only heard the resounding boom! as the ball ricocheted off the floor.

The cheers were loud, but you were deafening.

“LET’S GO!!” you screamed, pumping your fist. You rushed to swing your arm around Haruhi’s shoulders, nearly knocking her off her feet. “Did you see that receive? Beautiful! Gorgeous! That was amazing, Haruhi!”

“Oh, uh, thanks,” she said, rubbing her now-pink forearms.

“And Mori! My guy!” you threw open your arms in his direction. “You were born to be a middle blocker! And that spike, holy! Quit the Host Club right now and join the volleyball team, you faker!”

Mori looked overwhelmed. “I’m glad I was able to score.”

“Damn right you were able to score!” 

You reached down to swing your libero to their feet. They were more used to your post-game hollering than the Host Club and gladly let you tackle them into a hug and swing them around. As you dragged your libero along with you to gloat to your teammates, the hosts gathered together, similar expressions of surprise and confusion on their faces. Honey passed around towels and bottles of water.

“Geez, what’s wrong with them? Do you think they’re going to burst a blood vessel or something?” Kaoru said, wiping his face.

“I nearly went deaf when they started screaming,” Hikaru said, wincing. “I’ve never heard them that loud.”

Haruhi’s smile was bashful.  “I didn’t know they liked hugs so much.”

“That look of concentration on their face was terrifying,” Tamaki said faintly, his hair sticking up in all directions. “I thought they were going to murder me with the ball.”

“Athletes are invariably competitive,” Kyoya said. “You shouldn’t be surprised that they have a different personality on and off the court.”

“Their physical ability is quite impressive,” Mori said, more to the floor than any of the hosts. “I was not expecting it.”

“I’m so glad they won!” Honey exclaimed, swinging his legs on the stool. “It was so exciting! Even though Hikaru, Haruhi and Mori were dragging them  behind, they still managed to win!”

The aforementioned hosts winced. 

“You say it how it is, huh, Honey?” Hikaru said dryly.

“I had no idea volleyball was such a demanding sport,” Tamaki huffed. “And it’s so violent! I nearly had my nose broken on multiple occasions!”

“That’s because you kept staring at the ball instead of moving out of the way,” Kaoru quipped.

Kyoya pushed up his glasses. “All in all, I’d say today’s game was a success. Calculating the Host Club’s revenue today by charging for tickets at the door, we were able to make about a quarter more than we usually do.”

“You were charging people to watch?” Haruhi asked.

“Of course. Why else would I invite our guests here? We’ll split the revenue with the volleyball team forty-sixty.”

Haruhi narrowed her eyes at him. 

Kyoya blinked. “Oh, my mistake. Thirty-seventy.”

“I just hope this doesn’t ruin the guests’ perception of their tragic type,” Kaoru said, gulping down a bottle of water.

“On the contrary, this is just what they need,” Renge said, strolling toward the hosts. She nodded in your direction, and everyone turned to watch you being swarmed by guests, sheepishly accepting bottles of water and autograph requests. There was a glow about you, an ease to way you flicked sweat from your forehead and settled into a tired but happy haze. The hosts couldn’t deny the appeal of watching someone perform at their best and then be terribly humble about it afterwards.

“The tragic host has just revealed a new facet of themself,” Renge said smugly. “They are gentle and anxious around other people’s hearts, but they are ruthless on the court. Such clashing personalities, all contained in one person. How intriguing. Perhaps volleyball is an outlet for their anguish.”

Pointedly over the hosts’ shoulders, someone said, “You don’t know them at all if that’s what you think.”

Mayako. She strode toward them, her long ponytail swinging behind her. It was hard to read the expression on her face.

Tamaki laughed lightly. “Well, we know that’s not how they really are, we’re just saying—” but Mayako didn’t let him finish. 

“The version of them you’re seeing right now? That’s the real them.” She threw a hand in your direction. “ Loud. Impulsive. Bursting with energy. They’re not meek. They’re not reserved. They’re not miserable. If that’s the role you’ve cast for them, I don’t know why they’re still playing along with it. It’s so opposite to who they are that it's almost laughable.”

Mayako’s words were pointed but she wasn’t angry. She was defensive. Protective.

Of you. 

Kyoya kept his voice steady. “We’re aware of that, Mayako-san. Still, you are aware a part of the Host Club is intentionally keyed up for the guests’ sake.”

“But they’re not keying anything up,” Mayako said sharply. “They’re just lying. The host type they’re going for isn’t anywhere close to who they really are. I thought that was supposed to be important for all of you? Authenticity?”

Honey seemed a little confused when he said, “Of course we know this is how they really are. We’re their friends, after all. We’re not surprised because we weren’t expecting it. We’re surprised because it’s been a while since they’ve been like this.”

A line appeared between Mayako’s eyebrows.

“If you say so. How you want to act around them is none of my concern, only, I know I wouldn’t forget who they really are after all of the acting.”

She walked away then, approaching you and tapping on your shoulder with a gentle smile. Your face lit up when they saw her, then dimmed, maybe a little embarrassed. Mayako said something to you and you laughed. All of the hosts tensed when you leaned down to whisper something privately into Mayako’s ear.

“She’s just making a big deal out of nothing, isn’t she?” Haruhi hesitantly asked.

No one replied.

Chapter Text

None of the hosts minded you going to volleyball practice, but you did everything you could to make sure none of the volleyball team found out you were a host. It would just raise too many questions, and your team teased you enough without them knowing you batted your eyelashes at guests in your spare time.

Besides, you weren’t technically a host. It was only temporary, until the Host Club deemed your heart fully mended. Even though your broken heart had probably been healed ten times over by now, you were content not to bring it up if the Host Club didn’t. Even if you would never admit it, the Host Club had grown on you. Sometimes you actually enjoyed the ridiculous things they concocted for their guests. 

And so, to keep your dignity intact, you were still going to the Host Club with the excuse of a broken heart.

Your popularity had shot through the roof after your volleyball practice. Suddenly your request rate was over 60 percent, which Kyoya informed you was quite impressive considering your short tenure at the club and Tamaki sullenly told you wasn’t fair. By now, you could pull off the tragic persona without batting an eye, even summoning tears on command a few times. The guests never failed to coo with sympathy when you brought up your unfortunate past, always eager to offer you a comforting smile and affirmations of how wonderful you were. You would be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy being pampered by your guests. However authentic it was, it never hurt to have people fawn over you.

So long as “people” didn’t include Iwaizumi Mayako. 

You weren’t avoiding Mayako, per se. You weren’t doing anything, really. Your interactions with her were the same as always: still entertaining, still charming. But you couldn’t help feeling uncomfortable around her. You could feel her expectation like a weighted blanket. The way she looked at you, that patient, prodding expression, you almost couldn’t handle it. 

You liked Mayako, but you didn’t like her the way she liked you. And despite everything, that made you feel guilty.

During a lull in host activities, you drifted over to Honey and Mori’s table. The two hosts were sitting on opposite ends of a settee, Honey slurping down a milkshake one of his guests had gotten him and Mori flipping deliberately through a book. You figured you could rely on the two of them to give you some solid advice about how to deal with an unrequited crush. Honey was unfailingly sweet, and Mori was unfailingly courteous. They couldn’t go wrong.

“Hi!” Honey chirped. He looked up from his milkshake, the beginnings of a milk moustache forming on his upper lip.  “What’s up?”

“Nothing big. I just wanted to talk to you and Mori about something.” You made to sit in the armchair beside the boys’ settee, but Mori wordlessly slid further down the settee to make space for you. You plopped down between him and Honey and drew up your legs beneath you. 

You lowered your voice, not keen on having any of the other hosts overhearing you. “What would you do if one of your guests had a crush on you?”

“Wah, you have an admirer?” Honey gasped and you shushed him.

Mori shifted in his seat. His knee brushed against yours and for a second, it was all you could think about.

“You’re talking about Mayako-san, aren’t you?”

“Uh, yeah. How did you know?”

“She spends quite a bit of time with you.” There was a slight hesitance to Mori’s words that you’d never heard before. 

“Oh, Taka-chan is right! Mayako-san  is very fond of you! Haruhi used to be her favourite host but now she spends all of her time with you!” Honey’s gaze turned thoughtful. “Do you … like her back?”

“That’s the thing. Mayako is great, but … I don’t really like her like that. I don’t want to lead her on or anything, but I don’t want to hurt her feelings either. What do you guys think I should do?”

“I have received a few love confessions,” Mori said plainly. You raised an eyebrow.

“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. What did you do about them?”

Mori looked directly at you. “I would ask them to meet me under a copse of trees behind the school, where it was quiet and no one would overhear us.” He took your hand, his palm warm and calloused. “I would hold their hand and ask them to look at me.” He brushed his fingers along your jaw, tilting your head so that you were facing each other. You felt your pulse thrumming beneath your skin. Was it warm in here? You felt very warm.

“And then I would tell them…” Mori trailed off, his gaze still on your face.

“I’m sorry, but I’m not interested.”

The words were like a splash of ice water. You deflated. “Well, they don’t call you the stoic type for nothing.”

Mori shrugged one shoulder. “I don’t see the need to say anything else.”

“I don’t think I could say something like that without coming off as a jerk.” You tilted your head at Honey. “What about you, Honey? Any advice?”

“I don’t get a lot of people confessing their love to me, but if I did, I would tell them that I love them too! Just like I love cake, and Usa-chan, and naps, and anything sweet!” Honey beamed at you. You internally grimaced for whoever might be subject to Honey’s unintentional friend-zoning.

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“You should ask Tama-chan about this,” Honey said, poking around in his milkshake for the maraschino cherry. “He would know what to say.”

You had thought about that, but you had a feeling Tamaki’s suggestions would involve tightly gripping Mayako’s hands and whispering bittersweet apologies into her ear. Maybe while it was raining and a slow piano ballad played. All while looking tragically beautiful, of course.

You snorted to yourself. “I’m not that desperate yet.”

“Is there a reason you’re hesitant to return Mayako-san’s feelings?” Mori asked. He had gone back to looking at his book but the question was obviously deliberate.

“Not really. I just don’t really like her in the same way.”

“Is that all? Or is it because someone is holding you back?”

“Are you talking about Keiji?”

“I could be. Or could it be someone …”

In this club? 

Mori didn’t say the words but he might as well have. You felt your face heating again. 

“Are you okay? You don’t look too good,” Honey said.

“Looks like your guests are coming over,” you said quickly, getting to your feet. “I’ll let you get to them. Thanks for the advice.”

Honey grinned at you, and you were sure you were only imagining the knowing edge you saw there. The slight upturn of Mori’s brows as you walked away seemed to taunt you.

You weren’t even going to entertain the idea that someone in the Host Club was distracting you from Mayako’s advances. Because that would be ridiculous.

But not impossible.

♡ .⁺

“So, if a guest were to confess that they had feelings for you, what would you say?”

“W-what?” Haruhi blubbered through her tea, only narrowly avoiding splashing it onto her blazer. “Where is this coming from?”

You tried to shrug casually. “I’m just curious.”

Haruhi wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “Hang on, is this about Iwaizumi Mayako?”

“I can neither confirm nor deny.”

“Wow. I mean, the other hosts tried to tell me she had a crush on you but I didn’t really believe them.” Haruhi propped her chin up on her hands and smiled teasingly at you. “So she confessed, huh?”

“I don’t really see it as a good thing. I don’t really … I don’t like her back in the same way.”

Haruhi’s smile faded. “Oh.”

“Yeah. That’s why I was wondering if you had any advice on how to tell her.”

“I don’t really know too much about this stuff,” Haruhi admitted. “You should really go to Tamaki.”

Your eye twitched. “He’s my last resort.”

“Well, if I were in Mayako’s place, I’d probably just want you to lay it to me straight. Be honest about how you feel. It might hurt, but at least I know you’re not giving me false hope or anything.”

Finally. Some solid advice.

“That’s what I was thinking,” you said. “The other day she told me she wanted me to think things over before I gave her an answer. Gently but directly would be the best approach, right?”

Haruhi nodded. “I would think so.”

You folded your hands in front of you. “Okay. What if I said something like this? ‘Look, Mayako, you’re a great person and I’m flattered that you’re interested in me, but I don’t really like you the way you like me. You’re probably better off being with someone else.’ ”

“It’s a little heavy-handed, but it gets your point across if that’s all you’re after.”

You flinched. Kyoya was leaning over your seat, inserting himself into your conversation like it was at all his business.

“Is there some other way I’m supposed to say this?” you asked flatly. “Something I missed in the Host Club handbook?” Not that you had read a word of that manilla folder Kyoya had given you.

“There’s nothing about responding to confessions of love in our guidelines,” Kyoya responded. “I didn’t think it was necessary to include a section. It seemed like something that should be taken on a case-by-case basis. For the most part, the hosts have proven themselves more than capable of responding appropriately.”

You thought of Mori and Honey. “Right…”

“Well what would you say in their position?” Haruhi asked Kyoya pointedly. You grinned at her for coming to your defense.

Kyoya sat in one of the vacant chairs at the table. It was funny how he was always working on some thing or another, but when it came to criticising you, suddenly he had all the time in the world.

“I wouldn’t say anything,” he said. “I would let things continue as they are.”

“That is the exact opposite of what I thought you were going to say,” you said, frowning.

“I’m of the belief that it should be the host who follows the lead of the guest. How we interact with them depends on what they’re comfortable with and what they prefer. In this case, I would do nothing until the guest came to me a second time, in which case I would assume their feelings are genuine.”

“Okay? And what then?”

Kyoya side-eyed you. “Nothing. Most guests would not be willing to approach me a second time.”

You and Haruhi exchanged a glance. It took a bit before you understood what Kyoya was on about.

“Hold on. You’re basically just telling me to ignore Mayako until she loses interest in me!” you exclaimed.

“Yes. I was afraid I would have to spell it out for you,” Kyoya murmured.

You glowered at him. “That’s a terrible approach. Mayako was brave enough to confess her feelings for me, so I should at least extend the same courtesy and tell her up front what I feel.”

“I suppose. But you are avoiding a potentially very uncomfortable encounter by simply waiting Mayako’s feelings out.”

“That’s just cold! And extremely insulting!”

“Well, it’s served me well in the past,” Kyoya said placidly.

Haruhi rolled her eyes. “Right. And what admirers have you ever gotten outside of the club?”

“I prefer to keep that confidential.”

“I’m not going to ignore Mayako until she forgets about me,” you said. “She’s going to ask me again sooner or later.”

Kyoya shrugged. “If you don’t agree with my suggestion you could always ask Tamaki.”

“I just might if that’s the best idea you can give me,” you muttered.

“I have to wonder, though,” Kyoya continued. “Is there a reason you’re not open to Mayako’s feelings? Or a reason why you haven’t advanced anything?”

“What are you talking about?”

Kyoya smiled. It was a needling, knowing smile that got under your skin. “Oh nothing. It’s just that you’ve spent a while with the Host Club and in particular, with our lovely Haruhi and nothing has come from it.”

“Quit teasing them, Kyoya,” Haruhi said as your scalp prickled with embarrassment. “I like spending time with them. I’m not trying to get anything out of them.”

“The same can’t be said of everyone,” the Shadow King said softly.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.” Kyoya pushed away from the table. “Your next guest is here, Haruhi. You should probably go meet them.”

Haruhi gave you a sheepish smile.”Ignore him. You’re right about being honest with Mayako. I think you should tell her exactly what you told me. She’ll be able to tell that you’re trying to look out for her. Hopefully, it will all work out.”

“Thanks, Haruhi,” you sighed. “I appreciate it.”

♡ .⁺

You had no intention of asking the Hitachiin twins about Mayako, but they took it upon themselves to answer you anyway. As you were escorting a guest to the door, Hikaru said by your ear, “So what are you going to do about Iwaizumi Mayako?”

“Be quiet!” you hissed. You glanced around furtively. “I don’t need everyone knowing about her!”

“Everyone already knows,” Kaoru said, coming up behind his brother. “They’re just too nice to say anything.”

“The guests think it’s very romantic that one of the prettiest girls at Ouran has fallen for you,” Hikaru said solemnly. “They’re all hoping that you’ll reciprocate her feelings.”

“Unfortunately, that’s not going to happen,” you said, moving away from the door and to a quieter part of the music room.

“And why is that?” the twins asked together.

You heaved a sigh. You went quiet, long enough for the twins’ smirks to drop from their faces and for genuine concern to tug on their faces.

Kaoru brought his hand to your arm, saying your name in concern. 

“I can’t reciprocate her feelings because I’m in love with you,” you whispered.

Kaoru snatched his hand back as though he’d been burned. Hikaru's eyes bugged out of his skull.

“What?”

You looked down at your shoes for a few more seconds before snorting and then bursting into laughter.

“They should rebrand you guys as the Gullible Type. Of course I’m not in love with you. Either of you. I can’t reciprocate Mayako’s feelings because I don’t like her in the same way. That’s all.”

Kaoru coughed into his shoulder. “Right. Of course.”

Hikaru was rubbing at the spot on his chest where his heart was. “Give a warning next time before you say bull like that. I was about to get a heart attack.”

You shook your head. “I really need to figure out what to say to Mayako. It’s been a few days since she told me she liked me and I can’t just leave her hanging.”

“I don’t know what you’re waiting for. Just say you like her back.”

“But I don’t. Why would I lie to her?”

Hikaru shrugged. “Kaoru and I do it all the time. Just tell the guest you like them back, and a few weeks later, once they realize you’re not spending any time with them, they’ll back off.”

“You’re even worse than Kyoya,” you muttered.

“Why? What were you planning on doing?” Hikaru asked.

“I was just going to tell her up front that I didn’t like her back.”

Both twins winced.

“Oh, come on. You can’t tell me that’s worse than ignoring Mayako entirely or lying to her face.”

“You’re going to break Mayako’s heart doing that!”

The words came not from either of the twins but from Renge, striding toward you. It was like everyone in the Host Club had a sixth sense for listening in on your conversations. For once though, you actually didn’t mind Renge butting in.

“Actually, let me ask you too, Renge. If you think I’m going to break Mayako’s heart, then what should I say?”

Renge tossed her hair over her shoulder. “You need to make it seem as though you return Mayako’s feelings, but extenuating circumstances keep the two of you apart.”

You blinked. “The what keeps what apart?”

“I told you our idea was better,” Hikaru lilted under his breath.

“Perhaps a rivalry between your families prevents the two of you from being together,” Renge said breathlessly, clasping her hands together. “Or maybe you have a debilitating disease that numbers your days.”

“Or you’re hiding a shocking secret that would change the way Mayako saw you,” Kaoru suggested.

Hikaru didn’t miss a beat. “Or you have a huge wart on your back that curses anyone who falls in love with you.”

“I don’t know why I thought I was going to get a serious answer from you guys,” you sighed, too tired now to even be angry.

Renge huffed. “If you don’t want to listen to us then maybe you should just ask Tamaki.”

“Yeah, why haven’t you done that yet?” Kaoru asked.

“I bet the Boss could deal with this stuff in his sleep,” Hikaru  said. “He probably gets a dozen love confessions a day and you don’t see him getting upset about it.”

You looked over to where Tamaki was. He was standing with a guest near the windows, the afternoon sun sugaring the edges of his face as he smiled. It seemed impossible that he could say anything that would upset anyone. Probably the only words that fell out of his mouth were perfectly sweet ones.

Maybe you would just go ask Tamaki. He was the club President, after all.

Chapter Text

“Tamaki! Wait up! Do you have a second?!”

By the time you caught up with the Host Club’s President, you were already out of breath. He could walk offensively quickly with his long legs when he wanted to.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you wanted to talk to me or I would have waited.” Tamaki smiled at you. Could he just do that on command? Toss out blindingly bright smiles like they were nothing? Most people had to spend their whole lives training an expression like that in the mirror.

“What did you want to talk about?”

You waved a hand at him, trying to get your breath back. “We can keep walking. It shouldn’t take long.”

You fell into step beside Tamaki and the two of you continued walking to the front gate. You were close enough that you could pick up the pleasant scent from him you’d noticed a while ago—fresh linen and flowers.

“So, uh, I have a question for you. As the President of the Host Club and everything.”

“Ask away.”

“If a guest happened to have a crush on you, what would be the right thing to say in that situation?” You didn’t know why you felt embarrassed to have to ask Tamaki. It seemed like such a trivial thing all of a sudden, Mayako having a crush on you.

Tamaki pushed open the front doors of the academy and held them open for you. “Did a guest confess their feelings for you?”

“Yes…?”

“Would you happen to be talking about Iwaizumi Mayako?”

It was incredible how many times your face could heat in embarrassment. “Is that just common knowledge?”

Tamaki sat down on the front steps to wait for his chauffeur and you did the same.

“I think all of the hosts have noticed how much time Mayako-san spends with you. She’s evidently very fond of you, tragic host or not. And after our volleyball practice the other day, she—” Tamaki cut his sentence short. He looked off to the side, seeming to think better of whatever he’d been about to say.

“Anyway. So she’s finally told you how she feels. How do you feel about it?“

“I’m flattered, but to be honest it’s been bothering me.”

“How come?”

“I just … I just don’t like her in the same way. And I feel bad about that because she’s a great person. Funny and smart and really talented. I should feel grateful she even gave me a chance.”

Tamaki looked thoughtful. “Are you holding back because you’re afraid of what your family and friends might say?”

“No. They’d probably love Mayako.”

“Are you holding back because you’re scared of what Mayako’s family and friends might say?”

“Not really.”

“So you just don’t feel the same. That’s all?”

“Yes?”

Tamaki nodded. “I was thinking that you might be too insecure to admit you returned Mayako’s feelings, but if you just don’t feel the same about Mayako, this isn’t as complicated as you’re making it out to be.”

“I know that,” you muttered. “I just don’t know how to tell Mayako I don’t like her back without sounding like a jerk.”

“Pretend I’m Mayako,” Tamaki said, turning slightly to face you. “If she were here right now, what would you say?”

You pressed your lips together, looking into Tamaki’s violet eyes. His gaze was open and earnest. You’d be lucky if Mayako looked even half as approachable.

“Mayako, I think it was really brave that you were able to tell me how you felt, and I appreciate the courage it took to tell me. You’re a great person, and if it were anyone else, I’d tell them they were lucky to have you. It’s nothing about you personally, I just …” You sighed, and for a moment, it was Mayako’s hark hair and eyes you were seeing. Her slightly upturned mouth. “I’m just not looking to be in a relationship right now. I’m sorry. I hope you’ll understand. I don’t want to hurt you, it’s just that I don’t think it’s fair to start anything between us when I’m not in the right headspace.”

Wow. Your heart was pounding. You were in for a rough time if the practice run was this nerve-wracking.

You smiled questioningly at Tamaki. “Was that okay?”

Tamaki’s eyes drifted from your eyes to your mouth and then back up to your eyes. He cleared his throat. “I think that was lovely. I could tell you meant every word you said. You care about Mayako, and she should be able to see that if you didn’t, you wouldn’t spend so much time trying to let her down easy.”

You let out a relieved sigh. “I should have recorded that then. I’m not going to remember any of that when I see Mayako.”

Tamaki looked off beyond the school gates. “In these cases, honesty is the best approach. It shows the other person you have their best interest at heart. Even if it doesn’t feel like it at the moment, they’re trying to spare you from further pain.”

You looked at Tamaki from the corner of your eye. “That’s pretty deep, Boss. Are you speaking from experience?”

“No.” Tamaki laughed softly. “No one’s ever confessed their feelings to me before. I’m just speaking based on what I think.”

“Really? Suoh Tamaki, the prince of the Host Club, has never gotten a love confession?”

“Is that ironic?”

“You think? Maybe I’ll give you a confession just so you can fit the prince type better.”

Tamaki ducked his head. “I’d never ask that of you unless it was genuine.”

This was a new side of Tamaki, you realized. He was always earnest and kind hearted during club hours, but it was cast in a new light when he toned it down. It was kind of adorable, how bashful he could be.

“That would be my ride,” Tamaki said as a car pulled up in front of the gates. You got up when he did, suddenly tongue-tied when he glanced at you.

“Uh, get home safe. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I hope so,” Tamaki said with a lopsided smile. “You get home safe too.”

With that, he skipped down the front steps and then strode to his car.

“Tamaki!”

Tamaki paused. Looked back at you.

“Thank you. For the advice. I really appreciate it. You can actually be pretty smart when you want to be.”

“It was my pleasure,” Tamaki called back. “Anything to help my tragic host.”

You watched him leave, wondering how he had made “ tragic host” sound like a compliment.

♡ .⁺

You'd polished off half o f the Honey's box of bonbons but he didn't seem to mind. In fact, he had hurried off a few minutes ago to grab you another box. Honey was probably the best person to have a crisis around because he could supply you with a nearly endless supply of sweets.

There was nothing quite like drowning your sorrows in chocolate.

The hosts all drifted warily around, not sure how to deal with you. You had caught them just as they were wrapping up host activities for the day. Right as Kyoya had been about to chastise you for missing a day without any prior notice, you’d thrown yourself into the nearest settee, flung and arm over your eyes and let out a long, low groan. The action was sudden enough that Kyoya actually sounded concerned before he remembered to hide it.

“Are you alright?” 

Your eyes were squeezed shut under your arm. You weren’t going to cry, but the misery clamoured to be released.

“What’s up with you?” Hikaru asked.

“All the guests are gone, you don’t have to act tragic,” Kaoru said.

Haruhi: “What’s wrong with them?”

Mori: “They’ve been like this since they came in.”

Kyoya: “They had better have a good excuse as to why they didn’t come in today. They’ll have to work twice as hard next week to make up for their losses.”

Haruhi: “You always act like this is a job, Kyoya.”
The twins: “It might as well be.”

Renge: “Try elevating their feet. It helps with blood flow.”

Haruhi: “I don’t think—”

Tamaki: “Oh, Haruhi! You should get some of that cure-all medicine you commoners use! It must have something to help them!”

Haruhi: “Except we don’t know what’s wrong with them.”

Honey: “I got more chocolates!”

After much cajoling from the hosts, they managed to unspool the entire, miserable story from you.

For a few days after your talk with Tamaki, you had diligently prepared what you would say to Mayako. You’d practiced in the washroom, on the ride to school, under your breath during classes and in between volleyball practice and host appointments. You were determined to be nothing but eloquent and well-composed when you saw Mayako. The two of you would part on amicable terms and you’d be able to put this behind you without regret.

Today had been the day. You had everything ready, down to the exact tone and self-deprecating smile you’d punctuate the monologue with. You found Mayako after class and asked her to meet you on the lawns behind the academy (because if nothing else, Mori was right about the quiet).

It was the strangest thing. You had mastered your speech and here was Mayako. All you had to do was talk. All she had to do was listen. But then Mayako gave you the strangest look. Amusement bordering on excitement. Maybe a little bit of fear. Her hand found your arm, and with that one touch, everything flew out of your hand.

Your stutter-fest was spectacular. You were frankly surprised that Mayako had even recognized your words as Japanese. You just kept going on and on, and in the end, Mayako had to put you out of your misery by squeezing your arm and telling you she understood. Your throat was burning then, and you barely heard what Mayako said about not holding things against you and still being friends. As soon as you could, you stumbled away from her and lurched back into the school.

The embarrassment was crippling. No one had seen or heard you, but your pride was now halfway dead in a ditch somewhere. Unable to think of what else to do, you had staggered to Music Room 3, ready to make it your final resting place.

The twins found your plight hilarious. Honey, Mori and Haruhi were sympathetic. Renge was furious and Kyoya was a little exasperated at your melodrama. Tamaki stayed uncharacteristically quiet, but it was hard to say why over the twins’ cackling.

“You practiced all the time for what?” Hikaru wheezed. “Where’s your monologue? Lemme see it.”

“Give them some space, guys,” Haruhi said. “You’d be really upset too if you were in this situation.”

Kyoya sniffed. “I don’t think there’s much of a situation. They were able to tell Mayako the truth, and it seems that she took it well.”

“But no girl wants to be rejected like that!” Renge exclaimed. 

“It’s not like I meant to,” you groaned. “I just tripped up. I swear I meant for it to be as straightforward and pleasant as possible.”

Honey squeezed your hand comfortingly. Mori cleared his throat.

“I don’t think you should beat yourself up about this. You did your best. If I were Mayako, I would appreciate the fact that you put in all of this effort at all.”

 The hosts murmured in agreement. Renge was still a little affronted, but you think she could tell you had only meant well. 

You only remembered Tamaki was there when Renge went over to whack him on the back of the head. He let out a startled yelp.

“Don’t you have any words of comfort, Your Highness?”

Tamaki rubbed the back of his head. “I don’t think there’s anything to say. Mori is right. I think their behaviour is very commendable. Most people would find it difficult to have a conversation like that face-to-face.”

You met Tamaki’s gaze and something passed between the two of you. Understanding. Maybe even a bit of gratitude on your part.

You swung your legs off of the settee and looked at everyone in turn.

“There’s something I wanted to ask you all.”

“Yes, you are painfully average looking,” Hikaru said, and Kaoru elbowed him.

“How long is this going to go on?”

Tamaki frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean about me being a host. You said it was only until my heart was healed. Has that happened yet or…?” Catching the conflicting expressions on everyone’s faces, you added, “I don’t want to overstay my welcome. I’m not really a full-time member of your club and I don’t want to mess up any of your plans. Also, volleyball season is coming up so I wouldn’t be able to commit much anyway.”

The hosts exchanged glances. You had expected, especially from Kyoya, in particular, to have a concrete time of when your time as a host would be over. A few days or a week maybe. You had thought everyone was eagerly counting down the days when the Host Club would be back to normal. 

It wasn’t that you wanted to leave. You just didn’t find it fair for them to be making so many exceptions and work-arounds for you when you were just a casual host. You weren’t as serious about the club as the other hosts and Renge. At some point or other, volleyball and other commitments would take over. You might as well straighten things out now before they got muddled up later.

“It’s fine if you don’t know,” you said, feeling the silence start to press down on you. “I think Mori or someone said this was the first time you’d done something like this. I actually have an idea for you, if you want to hear it.”

Hikaru wasn’t scowling but he was close. “I just don’t get—”

“Let’s hear it,” Kaoru butted in. “What’s your idea?”

“I mean, you don’t have to agree, but there’s a little event my parents are hosting next week. They’re really big on displaying local talent, so they have a gala-type event every year with local artists. It’s this big competition. Everyone is welcome to submit a piece, and once the judges decide on the winners, they each get a cash prize of 300 000 yen. There’s always a really big turnout from Ouran students. My parents were wondering if the Host Club might want to help with hosting the event? Welcoming guests and making conversation and things like that. Something about them wanting to include the youth more or something.”

You were rambling. You told yourself to shut up and looked at all of the hosts expectantly. 

Honey was the first to speak. “I get it! It would be like your last party as a host before you pass on!”

Haruhi winced. “Honey, that makes it sound like they're going to die.”

“Yeah, pretty much. Like I said before, you guys don’t have to agree. It’s just an idea. We could just set my last day as next week and call it a day. That is, if my compensation is complete?” This was directed in Kyoya’s direction. He cleared his throat before consulting his black notebook.

“As a matter of fact, you finished your compensation two weeks ago. It’s really just a matter of what you prefer.”

“I need a minute alone with the Host Club,” Renge declared. “Plug your ears.”

“I’m not going to—”

She rounded up all of the hosts and brought them to the far room in a huddle. Sighing, you sat back on the settee to wait. You hoped you hadn’t given them the wrong impression. You had just thought your parent’s art gala would be a nice last hurrah with the Host Club. And anyway, you would still visit them afterwards. It wasn’t you’d be barred from Music Room 3.

Right?

Eventually, the hosts returned from their huddle. You found yourself getting a little nervous. You told yourself it wouldn’t be a big deal if the Host Club said no. A little sad, sure, but definitely not anything tot—

“We’ll do it!” Tamaki said brightly. “It sounds like the perfect opportunity for the Host Club to get involved.”

“If we use it as an advertisement opportunity, we could see an uptick in guests over the next few weeks,” Kyoya added.

“And it’d be nice to see what kind of art everyone displays,” Kaoru said. He looked at his brother pointedly but Hikaru only shrugged.

“Really? That’s great!” You said it louder than you’d meant to and couldn’t seem to control the smile that overtook your face. “It’s going to be so much fun. I’ll tell my parents tonight. We could decide on a theme and get our costumes together!”

The hosts seemed surprised at your enthusiasm. You were too, but you couldn’t help it. Maybe you had been more afraid of everyone saying no than you’d thought.

Haruhi let out a laugh. “You’re really excited about this, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, I am.” You grinned and for a moment, everyone seemed at a loss for words.

Chapter Text

“Hold on. I haven’t been able to talk to you all night.”

You nearly tripped from stopping so abruptly. It had been like that for most of the night, you rushing around in an eager cloud, only pausing when someone greeted you or something caught your attention. Normally for events like this, and particularly art events your parents hosted, you would claim a corner and sulk until your parents allowed you to slink off. It must have come off as a surprise how involved you were for this gala. Everything seemed bright and colourful and glimmering, and you could barely stay in one spot before something else called you off.

“Is everything okay, Mom?” you asked.

Your mother smiled. “Yes, everything is fine. I just wanted to thank you for all of the effort you’re putting into the gala tonight. I know you don’t usually enjoy things like this but it means a lot to me and your father how much energy you’re bringing to the event. We haven’t seen his side of you in a while.”

You shrugged. “I know I haven’t been making it easy, sulking and groaning and all that. I figured tonight was as good a time as any to quit all of that. Plus there’s some really great art here tonight. It hasn’t been that hard to get excited.”

Your mother pulled you to her and kissed the top of your head. “I’m so proud of you. You’re becoming so mature.”

You were a little insulted your mother hadn’t thought you were mature before but you let it slide. To be honest, you had gotten pretty tired of your moping too since Malta. You were glad to put it behind you, and that was due, at least in some part, to the Host Club.

“You remember the speech that’s going to happen before the dinner, right?” your mother asked, letting you go.

“Yeah. I’m looking forward to it. I never heard who the speaker was going to be.” Your parents’ choice for speeches had run the entire gamut of people in the past. They liked having someone new each year to hype everyone up before judging went underway after the dinner.

Your mother looked at you, a slight line between her eyebrows. It smoothed a moment later, and she sighed, shaking her head. “It’ll be a surprise then.” 

You gave your mother a questioning look. She smiled. “Go find your friends and let them know the dinner will be starting soon. I’m so glad you invited them. They’ve been such a big help. We’ve never gotten such a big turn out before. I’ll have to remind your father that we need to thank them all when the gala is over.”

“Alright. Whatever you say, Mom.”

It seemed that Kyoya hadn’t been lying that one time he said the Host Club had experience overseeing events. Haruhi had informed you the Host Club happened to be one of the main attractions during school festivals and academy open-houses. 

The entire night, they had all been nothing but cordial and refreshing. They knew enough about art to keep the older crowd occupied and could flirt well enough to keep the younger crowd from going home too early. Indeed, you had overheard the judges marveling at the number of submissions they’d gotten and how this year would be much more interesting competition-wise. It seemed that word had gotten around at Ouran about the Host Club being at the gala and most of their usual guests couldn’t resist.

You hadn’t seen Mayako, which was a relief. Not that you would have minded, but you wanted to enjoy yourself tonight. You wanted to make your last time with the Host Club memorable. Maybe muster enough courage to deliver an eloquent speech about how thankful you were they had taken you on and helped you out of your post-breakup fog. 

It was easy enough to find Honey by the refreshments table, Mori hovering nearby. He waved at you and you grinned.

You had asked the Host Club a few days before the gala what an appropriate theme would be for the outfits that would inevitably have to be put together. To your surprise, no one had very adamant opinions about it until Haruhi suggested that you all dress like 19th century painters. Dark pants, flowy white shirts, mussed hair and smudges of paint. You actually didn’t mind it, and the guests were just eating it up.

That said, it had taken everything you had to dissuade Renge from her fixation on nude models. There would be both children and elderly present tonight, you told her firmly.

Honey had a dark blue beret perched in his hair. The twins always managed to find the cutest hats for him.

“How’s everything going?” you asked him and Mori. “Enjoying yourselves?”

“Everything’s great!” Honey said. “There’s such beautiful art here tonight! I didn’t know we had so many great artists at Ouran!”

“Me neither,” you said dryly. “It’s almost like they were summoned.” You looked at Mori. “How are you doing, big guy?”

“Big guy?” he repeated.

You shrugged. There was no alcohol in the refreshments being served but your tongue got looser the later it was in the night.

Mori’s face softened. “You’re enjoying yourself.”

“I am, actually. I’m finished moping around. I just want to end tonight off on a high note and convince you all that I’m over Keiji.”

Honey said your name hesitantly. Mori shot him a warning look. 

“Could it be that you don’t know?”

“Know what?” You raised an eyebrow. “Is there another plan I forgot to catch up on? Does it involve anyone getting trampled?”

“No trampling.” Honey scratched his head underneath his beret. “Actually, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.”

You eyed him suspiciously but he didn’t reveal anything else. A glance at Mori revealed that he'd put on his stone face.

This had better not bite me in the ass later.

“Dinner is starting soon,” you said, choosing to let it slide. “You guys should get going before it gets crowded. Do you want me to help you find your seating?”

“No,” Mori said hurriedly. “We’ll be fine. Go find everyone else.”

“Yes, we’ll be fine,” Honey said.

“Alright then.” You turned on your heel and folded into the crowd to find the rest of the hosts, getting the distinct sense that Honey and Mori were having a fevered conversation under their breaths as you left.

You found the twins still in the gallery. They weren’t talking to anyone, both of their necks slightly craned to take in the large oil painting in front of them. You stopped just beside them and studied the painting too. It was quite a bit larger than the art around it, transforming the wall in front of you into a sunny path lined with sakura trees. You could almost feel the cherry blossoms brushing past your face as they fell. The artist had chosen to paint the blossoms using several shades of pink so that the boughs of the trees blurred together in a delicate cloud, disappearing into the blue sky beyond.

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Karou said, although it felt like an understatement.

Hikaru hummed. “I wonder who painted it.”

You looked down at your shoes. “It was me, actually.”

You almost heard the twins whip their heads towards you. You kept looking at your shoes as you said, “I’ve been trying to change my mindset in the past couple of weeks. My parents always told me to try my hand at doing art. I had a hard time with the regular-sized canvases, though, so I went bigger.” You looked up at the painting. “I wanted to make something that would surround you. Make you fall into it.”

“This is amazing,” Kaoru said, his eyes wide. “You should have taken up art sooner, you have a real talent for it.”

You nodded serenely, then caught Hikaru’s vicious side-eye and burst out laughing.

“I swear,” he sighed.

“What? So you didn’t make this painting?” Kaoru said, aghast.

“Hell no. I can barely colour inside the lines. The artists’ names are under each work,” you wheezed, gesturing under the frame.

Hikaru pursed his lips at his brother. “Haven’t I taught you better than that?”

“Well I’m sorry. When they get all earnest like that, it’s hard to tell,” Kaoru sniped.

“Dinner is going to be starting soon,” you said. “You should get to your seats. “After that, it’s the speech from whoever my parents chose for speaker.”

Your words seemed to jolt something in the twins. They glanced at each other, then at you.

“Do you know who the speaker is?” Hikaru asked casually. A little too casually.

“No. Do you?”

“No idea,” Hikaru said.

“No idea at all,” Kaoru agreed.

“We should get going,” they said together. 

“Uh, yeah. Sure.”

“Haruhi was looking for you earlier,” Hikaru said, giving you a light shove in the opposite direction. 

“Said she was outside looking for stragglers,” Kaoru added. “You should go find her.”

“Okay. Are you guys going to be okay”

“Yes. Definitely. Go,” the twins said, and all but ran in the direction of the dining hall.

You weren’t quite worried, but it was getting up there. You hoped it was just the twins getting riled up over nothing.

You hadn’t been outside all night and so was surprised by the sudden chill you felt out there. You crossed your arms over yourself and scanned the area outside the front doors for Haruhi. There didn’t seem to be anyone outside, so at least she had done a good job on the stragglers.

When you were sure she wasn’t outside, you ducked back into the gallery. Maybe she’d gone to the restrooms. Sure enough, that was where you found her, catching the tail end of her conversation before she ended her call.

“Yes. I will, Dad, don’t worry. Mhm. Yep. Love you too.” She smiled sheepishly at you as she slipped her phone away. 

“Your dad?” 

“Yeah. He’s pretty devastated that I didn’t invite him to the gala.”

“Why didn’t you? I would’ve liked to meet him.”

“No, you wouldn’t have,” Haruhi said, but there was a laugh behind her words. 

“Come on, he’s probably great.”

“He is, he is,” Haruhi conceded. “It’s just he’s been working all week. He’s been pretty tired so I didn’t want to bother him. I can always take you sometime after school if you’re that keen on meeting him.”

“Oh yeah? It's nice that you’re looking out for him. What does he work as?”

“He’s an entertainer at a nearby okama bar,” Haruhi said. Her tone didn’t change but there was a slight edge to her words. She looked at you, waiting for your reaction.

You grinned. “That’s pretty cool. Way more interesting than being art conservators or whatever it is my parents do.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Haruhi relaxed. “You should see some of the outfits he puts together. And he’s always harping on me for not dressing my age.”

If Haruhi’s dad was as exuberant as you were imagining, it explained a lot of things about Haruhi, you thought.

“Dinner’s going to start soon. I was just going to wrangle everyone up.”

“Finally. I’m starving.” Haruhi looked around. “Which way is the dining hall again?”

“Don’t worry. I’ll take you.”

As she fell into step beside you, you asked, “Hey, do you have any idea who the speaker tonight is going to be?”

Haruhi glanced up in surprise. “You don’t know.”

“No. No one told me. Who is it? Honey and Mori were pretty cagey about it. The twins too.”

Haruhi bit her lip. “Well…”

“Just tell me. I don’t know why this is such a big deal.”

“It really isn’t. You’re going to find out soon anyway.”

“If you guys are acting like this there has to be a reason.”

Haruhi frowned. She brought you to a stop just outside of the dining hall. Beyond, you could make out the murmur of the crowd as everyone began settling down for the first course.

“Don’t freak out.”

“Give me some credit.”

“I do. I just… I don’t want you to get upset.”

“I’m not upset but I am getting pretty worried.”

Haruhi took a deep breath. “The speaker tonight is going to be—”

“Appearing after the dinner,” someone cut in. “I thought you would know that.”

“Yeah thanks, smartass,” you said to Kyoya, glowering at him. “I’m aware of that. I just want to know who the speaker is.”

“You’ll find out shortly,” Kyoya said, settling a hand on Haruhi’s shoulder. “No need to rush things.” He guided her into the dining hall, and you were about to bluster after him when you heard Tamaki call your name.

“Are you ready for the dinner?”

“Sure. Just give me a straight answer first. Who is the speaker tonight going to be? Why is everyone acting like it’s my long-lost grandmother?”

Tamaki half-smiled. “That’s one way to put it.”

“Who is it?”

Tamaki linked his arm through yours. “You’re going to find out as soon as we walk through those doors. I tried to get everyone to keep you away for as long as possible, but I think we’re overreacting. You’re going to be fine.”

“You’re making me nervous.”

“Just know that we’re here to support you,” Tamaki said firmly. “Me and all of the Host Club.”

You were dimly aware of your heart kicking up its pace. Something whispered in the back of your mind. Maybe a part of you already knew who the speaker would be.

“Tamaki…” you said, but you didn’t know what you wanted.

“You’re going to be fine,” he said again. “It isn’t a big deal. That’s what you’re always saying, right?”

He led you through the dining hall. You willed yourself to keep your eyes forward until you reached your table with the rest of the Host Club. Only after sitting down and taking a gulp of water did you let your gaze wander. Over the heads of the various guests and artists and judges to where your parents were near the stage. They were talking to someone, gesturing at the podium and probably going over last minute logistics. Both of them were turned in toward the person so that you couldn’t make out who it was. But soon enough, the first meal came out and they all went back to their seats. 

Your heart jolted, even though it shouldn’t have. It should have been obvious. You should have expected it.

Because Nishio Keiji had always loved giving speeches and you had been the one to ask him to speak at this art gala, all those months ago back in Malta.

Chapter Text

“Keiji, I have a great idea.”

He smiled at you lazily. “You always have great ideas.”

“Don’t patronize me. I’m serious this time. It’ll actually help you.”

He picked up your hands and started tracing circles into your palm. “Alright. I’m listening.”

“You remember the annual art gala my parents host every year, right? They love having someone younger deliver a speech at the end of the dinner to get everyone’s energy up before the judging. You should write something for it. I bet my parents would love to have you. It’d be a great chance to get some exposure.”

He was quiet for a long moment. Long enough for you to start doubting yourself. Maybe you had come on too strong.

But you wanted to encourage him. You loved the way his eyes lit up, the smile that creased his cheeks when you applauded and told him how great he was. He knew how to command attention and move a room with his words. It seemed like a shame that you were his only audience.

“Do you really think I could do that?” he asked finally.

“It wouldn’t be too much of a big deal,” you said. “An event, but a pretty small one, considering. We could put it together once vacation is over. It doesn’t have to be anything grand.” It was the first time you were making plans beyond the vacation. Acknowledging that there could be an after to this vacation. That things could still go on once you left Malta.

“But half the fun is in making it grand,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

“Then you can make it as grand as you want,” you said, kissing him.

He kissed you back, and you took that to mean that he had agreed.

You refused to look in Keiji’s direction again. All the same, his presence burned a hole in your periphery. You were keenly aware of him. You could almost hear him speaking, even though he was sitting a few tables away. Everything seemed sharper now that Keiji was here and not in the blurry fog of your Malta memories.

He was here. In Japan. At your parents’ gala. You had invited him yes, but that had been before. Why would he show up now? That meant he’d been planning all this time. He’d talked to your parents and they hadn’t said a word to you. Wouldn’t it also mean—

You stomped on Tamaki’s foot, and he hissed in pain. 

“What is this?”

“What are you talking about?” he said, bringing up his foot. “What is what?”

“This was your idea, wasn’t it? Getting Keiji to come here to give the speech? You and Kyoya probably cooked it up to help me with my heartbreak treatment or something stupid like that.”

Tamaki looked hurt, and not just because of his foot. “We didn’t have anything to do with this. We were just as surprised to see Keiji here as you were.”

“We didn’t even have any way of approaching Keiji,” Kyoya said. “It’s likely your parents had this planned in advance.”

“Yeah, behind my back,” you muttered darkly, stabbing your fork into your food.

“That’s cold,” Hikaru said. “Imagine inviting your kid’s ex as the speaker at your art gala.”

“They probably didn’t do it to hurt you,” Honey said. “Keiji just must be a really great speaker!”

You scowled because Honey was right. Keiji was a great speaker. If you had still been together, he probably would have spent the past few weeks going over his speech with you. You would’ve had it memorized nearly as well as he did, murmuring it under your breath when he was up at the podium.

“Are you going to be okay?” Haruhi asked gently.

You let out a long breath. “Yeah. I’ll be fine. Keiji’s speech has nothing to do with me. I’m not going to make it a bigger deal than it is.”

If Keiji had been here the entire time, why hadn’t he said hello to you yet? It was one thing for you to want to avoid him, but Keiji was unfailingly amiable. No matter how bad the two of you had left things, he would’ve at least acknowledged that you were here tonight. Especially because it was your parents who had let him speak tonight.

Maybe he’s nervous, you thought, glancing in his general direction, although you had never known him to be. 

If you were really the changed person you were claiming to be, you would go over to him right now and say something. Treat things as normal. 

“Hey, where’s Renge?” Kaoru asked, drawing your attention back to the table. It was only then that you realized there was an empty chair between Honey and Haruhi.

You jolted guiltily. You had been so caught trying to find out who the speaker was you had completely forgotten to rally her for dinner.

You pushed your chair back. “That’s my bad. She’s probably still be the—”

Renge said your name suddenly, putting a heavy hand on your shoulder. You squawked in surprise. 

Her voice came out somewhere between a sob and a wheeze. “You need to get out of here.”

“Where have you been?” you said. “We’re almost on our second course.”

“You have to get out of here,” Renge said, her chest heaving. “Come on, we’ll smuggle you out. It’s not too late.”

“What are you talking about?”

Renge pulled on your arm, surprising you with her strength. “Come on. Up you go. I’m trying to help you, idiot.” She threw an exasperated look at the rest of the table. “What are you all just sitting there for? Come on, help me get them out of here!”

“And why do we have to do that?” Haruhi said.

Renge’s eyes bugged out of her skull. “Is that seriously a question?” she sputtered.

“Renge, calm down,” Kyoya said, taking a sip from his glass.

“What’s going on?” you asked her. 

Renge pressed her lips together. She yanked you towards her and hissed in your ear, “Nishio Keiji is going to be the speaker tonight. You have to leave. Now.” 

You drew back. “I already know Keiji is the speaker,” you said flatly.

“You do?” Renge looked at you like had sprouted horns. She turned to the rest of the table. “They already know?”

“Renge, you’re even slower than usual tonight,” Hikaru said.

She let out an indignant splutter, then threw herself into the empty seat at the table. “You should have told me! I was running around like a madwoman trying to find them and save them from imminent doom! Look at my hair! I am embarrassingly out of breath for nothing!”

“Your concern is very touching,” Tamaki said. “We appreciate all of the hard work you do, Lady Manager.”

The dinner passed by sooner than you wanted it to. You told yourself to stay in the moment and enjoy yourself, but you kept getting distracted by Keiji. Or rather, your ideas of Keiji. You wanted to get a closer look at him. You wanted to punch his face in. You wanted to hear his speech. You wanted to shout all of the questions he left you with.

“You should make him jealous,” Renge said offhandedly as dessert was cleared away. It was a good thing you hadn’t been eating anything or you would have choked.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“It’s the perfect way to get back at Keiji,” Renge said, nodding. “He’ll be devastated when he sees how well you’ve moved on without him. You’ll crush his heart in your fist with how little you care.”

You drank your water. “I’m not doing that.”

“No, Renge’s got a point,” Hikaru said. “Why shouldn’t you make Keji jealous? He’d deserve it. I think you should pick one of us to start making out with the minute he looks this way.”

You snorted. “That is not happening.”

“Why? You don’t want to kiss us?”

“No comment.”

“So you would!” Hikaru said triumphantly. “Which one of us would it be then? If you had to pick?”

“No comment.”

“Yeah, who would it be?” Honey asked, all innocent curiosity.

You slumped in your seat. “Can I please get a pass on this?”

As fate would have it, you did get a pass. The hall quieted as the lights dimmed and attention turned to the stage at the front and the person who crossed its length to stand at the podium. He smiled, bright and confident and magnetic. His hair was perfect.

Your heart tripped in your chest when Keiji began to speak.

“Good evening everyone. Thank you for coming today. I hope you’ve enjoyed your evening so far.”

He still sounded the same. It was like he’d never left.

You didn’t hear a word he said. You could only focus on the way his hands mirrored his sentences, the easy eye contact he maintained with the crowd, the rise and fall of his voice. You were the only two people in the room. 

“I’d like to thank the gala committee for giving me the opportunity to speak today. I greatly admire their love and dedication to art of all kinds. I think it’s amazing that we’ve all managed to gather here today on account of that.”

You felt the exact moment that it happened. Keiji’s eyes swept over the crowd, and for a beat, your gazes met. Maybe you imagined it, but there was the slightest hesitation, a flash of recognition no one would have noticed. He’d seen you. You were sure of it.

There was applause. Keiji had finished his speech. You felt lightheaded, your heart beating too fast. You saw Keiji descend the stage, and then, impossibly, make his way toward you. 

You pushed back from the table. “I need to go,” you blurted.

Mori made as though to grab your arm but stopped himself. “Do you want one of us to go with you?”

“No. No, it’s fine.” Keiji was only a few tables away now. His arm was lifted. Was he going to wave? You wouldn’t be able to handle a conversation with him. Not here. You had lied about being mature.

And so, like a damsel at midnight, you fled from the dining hall.

♡ .⁺

The hosts watched you leave. They wanted to follow, of course, but the more pressing matter seemed to be that Nishio Keiji was still making his way to their table. He must have seen you leaving too, because his face fell once he drew closer. He was ready to trail after you but not before Hikaru slapped him on the back and Kaoru threw a blinding smile at him.

“That was a great speech back there,” Kaoru said. He and his brother angled themselves so that Keiji wouldn’t be able to leave without weaving awkwardly around them.

“Uh, thanks. I appreciate it.” Keiji smiled, but he was obviously put off by the praise from strangers.

“Hitachiin Hikaru,” Hikaru said, gesturing to himself. “And my brother, Kaoru. You probably recognize our surname from our mother, Hitachiin Yuzuha.”

Keiji blinked. “Yes, of course. My mother adores her fashion line.” He glanced in the direction of the dining hall doors. Do you know where they went just now?”

“We have no idea,” the twins said together. 

“Would you mind staying to talk with us for a bit?” Renge asked sweetly. “We were just saying how we’d love to learn more about you. You’re such a talented speaker!”

It was obvious that was the last thing Keiji wanted, but he allowed himself to be sat down in a chair.

“Ootori Kyoya,” Kyoya introduced himself, reaching across the table for Keiji’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Ootori? As in the Ootori Health Group?”

Kyoya smiled demurely, neither confirming nor denying Keiji’s question. 

Tamaki was the next to reach for Keiji’s hand. “Suoh Tamaki. If you ever need an in with the Chairman of Ouran Academy, I’m your man.”

Haruhi watched shrewdly as everyone introduced themselves to Keiji, taking care to use their full names and making no secret of their wealthy, influential families. It had to be an intimidation tactic, she realized. For all of Keiji’s charisma, his family was still middle-class.

When it was Haruhi’s turn, Kyoya swept in for her and dropped a hint that her father was a critically acclaimed actor who liked to keep a low profile. Keiji didn’t bat an eye at this. Everyone else had already star-struck him.

For the next little while, under a veil of flattery and admiration, the Host Club grilled Keiji on everything from his childhood to his favourite movie genre. They meant to give you space, of course, but a part of them wanted to know why you had fallen for this boy. They wanted to find a crack in Keiji’s facade, some fatal flaw to drag in front of you and make forgetting Keiji all that much easier.

But Keiji seemed to have no fatal flaw. He was as funny and charming and honest as you had said. If he had gone to Ouran, Tamaki wouldn’t have thought twice about recruiting him as a host. He was a great guy, which only made it more perplexing why he could have broken up with you in the first place.

Finally, he excused himself when no one could think of anything else to keep him. He immediately darted for the dining hall doors—probably to find you.

“Is it bad that I really want to hear whatever conversation they’re about to have?” Renge said.

“They deserve a bit of privacy,” Haruhi said, although she was itching to eavesdrop too. This felt like the climax of something, a final reveal to tie everything together.

“Permission to spy, Boss?” Hikaru said.

Tamaki frowned down at his hands. “We really shouldn’t…”

“If they’re speaking in a public location, it is not our fault if something is accidentally overheard,” Kyoya said. 

“We have to know what happens,” Renge said. “It’s Keiji’s fault they even came to us in the first place! We have an obligation to see this through to the end.”

Tamaki still looked conflicted.

“I think we should at least check on them,” Honey said. “Just to make sure Keiji doesn’t make things worse.”

“We’re definitely going to make things worse if all of us start snooping,” Haruhi pointed out.

Tamaki drew in a rallying breath. “Someone should check on them. Just in case.”

Hikaru was already halfway out of his chair, pulling Kaoru up by the arm. “So glad you agree, Boss. Come on, Kaoru—”

“Mori? If you don’t mind?”

Hikaru’s mouth fell open as Mori nodded once and slipped out of his seat.

“ Mori? But gathering intel is supposed to be our job, Boss!”

“Taka-chan is good at observing,” Honey said plainly. “He won’t draw attention to himself and he won’t get involved unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

“Honey is right,” Tamaki said, leaning back in his seat. He pushed a hand through his hair. “We tend to get over excited. If anything happens to them, I trust Mori to support them.”

“As long as he tells us everything that happens,” Renge said.

Chapter Text

Embarrassingly, Keiji found you as you were standing outside, calling your chauffeur to pick you up. As he appeared in your periphery, you genuinely considered hopping into one of the random cars that were pulling up alongside the pavement, or maybe feigning a phone call and walking in the opposite direction. But Keiji reached you before you could decide on either of these things, and the small, uncertain smile he gave you stopped all trains of thought.

“Hey,” he said. 

“Hey,” you said. 

He looked good. It was easier to admit that now that he was standing right in front of you. His eyes. His jaw. His stupidly perfect hair that Renge had astutely pointed out. You suddenly felt ridiculous in your flowy shirt and loose trousers.

“We didn’t get a chance to talk earlier. I guess I was too nervous about my speech to remember that you would be here. Stupid of me.”

“There are a lot of people here tonight,” you said. “More than we usually have. They must have come for you.” The words were faintly surprising to you. Slightly teasing, slightly mocking. Like how the two of you had used to talk.

“Yeah, I doubt that.” Keiji shook his head and laughed quietly. You were staring at him. You had to stop.

“Is it okay if we talk? I know we left things kind of … in the air.”

You had been dreading those words. Can we talk? After Malta, all you had wanted to do was talk but now that Keiji was here and you were hearing his voice and seeing the slight quirk in his lips—

“Okay,” you said over your pounding heart. “Yeah, we can talk.”

You needed to take control so you led Keiji to somewhere quiet—still outside, though, in case you needed to make an escape. You sat on the steps of one of the side entrances and after a beat, Keiji joined you. A good few inches away, but it still felt too close.

“So,” you both said at the same time, and then stopped. Keiji smiled. You tried not to. 

“What happened to you?” you blurted. You couldn’t handle these false starts and bashful smiles anymore. “You said we would keep in touch. We had each other’s numbers. Were you really that busy?” For weeks on end? Not even a text? I had to assume we broke up. Do you know how hard that was? I kept giving myself false hope. Is that what you wanted?

Keiji frowned. He glanced at you, and then off into the distance. “I don’t really know how to tell you this.”

“Just tell me. I think it’s the least you owe me. We spend all that time together and then nothing. Did you enjoy leading me on? Is that it? Did you expect to win me back tonight?”

“No, that’s not it at all,” Keiji said. The force behind his words caught you off guard. He sighed. “I was scared, okay? I didn’t know how I felt about you, but I could tell that you really liked me. Maybe more than I was ready for. I didn’t know how to react. So I didn’t say anything when you left to give myself time to think. And then when I figured it out, so much time had passed by already and it seemed easier to just leave things be. I didn’t know how to bring it up without making things awkward. It was a stupid thing to do, but it was the only thing I was comfortable with. I know I should have said something. However you feel about it, it’s completely warranted. It’s probably unfair of me to assume that we can just go back to being friends but I’m sorry. I should have realized however uncomfortable I felt, how you felt would have been worse. I really am sorry. I’m stupid. I know that.”

You hadn’t looked at Keiji the entire time he’d spoken. This wasn’t like his speeches. It was rushed, long-winded, confusing. But his heart was still there. Keiji never said what he didn’t mean.

That didn’t mean it was any less of a sucker punch though. His words stung; everything you hadn’t wanted to hear.

“I thought you hated me,” you said, your voice hoarse. “I thought I did something wrong.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong. It was just me. I just didn’t know how to handle things.”

You shouldn’t ask. It would only make things worse. But you wanted to hear Keiji say the words you were thinking.

“What do you mean, you didn’t know how you felt about me? I thought—weren’t we together?”

Keiji must have found it just as hard to look at you as you did him. His jaw was clenched.

“I liked you. A lot. Being together seemed natural at the time but—I don’t want to hurt you.”

You already are. “I want to see it from your side, Keiji. Tell me what you couldn’t before.”

Keiji swallowed, and his Adam’s apple bobbed. “I liked what we had together. Being with you, listening to you, all the time we spent, I don’t regret that. It’s just that I never felt … more than that. Even after the first time we kissed and every time after that. It was nice, but … it wasn’t what I was looking for.”

In all of the times that you had run through this scenario, you had never considered this. The electric thrill of his touch, the way his smile jolted butterflies in your stomach, the way his voice could dip and send everything haywire—

Keiji had felt none of that. Or at least, nothing like you had.

“You’re an amazing person,” Keiji said when you stayed silent. His voice trembled slightly. “You’re smart and funny and you put your entire heart into everything you do. You were perfect. It’s just somehow … you’re not my person.”

Despite everything, his voice was still sweet. Still adorably sincere. It was the only thing keeping you from going over—how earnest Keiji was. He didn’t mean to hurt you. This was just the truth.

Keiji’s hand found yours. He squeezed it, and when you looked at him, his smile wobbled.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been so stupid. But I hope you understand.”

It would be easy to hate Keiji. To wonder what any of that in Malta had meant and why you had wasted so much time hung up on someone who didn’t  feel the same. But you did understand. In a different life, the two of you might have played out the way you and Mayako had. It was awkward and uncomfortable but feelings were like that sometimes. You didn’t hate Mayako and you didn’t hate Keiji. There wasn’t much you could do to reign in your feelings once they were set on someone.

You squeezed Keiji’s hand back. He slid his hand over your shoulder and drew you to him.

“You really are amazing. You’ll find someone. Someone way better than me.”

“What I don’t get is how you managed to come here at all to speak at the gala,” you said.

“Your parents were the ones who reached out to me,” Keiji replied. Then, before you could storm off for their heads, he added, “I think they knew I needed to talk to you. Or maybe they didn’t. I just knew that I had to use this opportunity to see you. No matter how scared I was.”

“I’m glad you told me, Keiji. I can’t say everything is okay, but … I appreciate your honesty.”

Keiji looked into your face. His eyes softened at whatever he saw there.

“I should get going then,” he said, rising to his feet. “I—see you later?”

You nodded, your throat suddenly tight. Keiji walked away, slowly, as if he were waiting for you to call out to him. You didn’t. 

You didn't know how long you sat out there on the steps, not thinking about anything in particular. The Host Club was probably wondering where you were. You didn’t want to go back to the gala, but you didn’t want to go home either. You felt listless. Strangely empty.

Someone cleared their throat and you nearly jolted out of your skin.

“Mori, you scared the crap out of me,” you hissed as Mori melted uncannily into view. It wasn’t fair that someone so tall could move so quietly.

He gave you a once-over. You must have looked bad because he asked, “Do you mind if I sit with you?”

You shrugged. Mori took up the spot Keiji had been in a few minutes ago. His long legs took up more space, though, and his knee brushed against yours slightly.

“You must have heard everything,” you said dully.

“I didn’t hear anything. I only saw you and Keiji go around the corner. I waited for a while after I saw Keiji leave, but you didn’t follow, so I came to check on you.”

“Well, here I am. Still in one piece.” You sounded weary. You were weary, you realized. Suddenly all you wanted to do was lie down and close your eyes.

“... Are you alright?”

“I’m okay,” you sighed. “Things could be worse. I could be on fire. Or you could be on fire. Or, worse yet, we could both be on fire.”

Mori’s mouth twitched. “That would be the worst thing?”

“Of course. Compared to that, a talk with your ex is nothing.” Your voice chipped off at that. You felt your eyes burning. The urge to cry hadn’t surfaced since Keiji had left but maybe now was it.

“You sound like you’re going to cry.”

“Geez, Mori, keep this up and I just might.” You drew up your legs and rested your forehead on your knees. “I feel so dumb, Mori. I thought Keiji and I were supposed to be something. But Keiji didn’t feel any of that. How did I read the signals so wrong?”

“It’s hard to tell what people think.”

“Yeah, but you’re supposed to know, aren’t you? When it comes to things like this? Aren’t you supposed to know who your person is?”

“When has it ever been that simple?” Mori whispered, and those words nearly did you in. You squeezed your eyes shut, feeling tears slide down your cheeks.

“I liked him. I like him a lot. I’ve never felt like that about anyone. Keiji was my first crush.”

“He’s a good guy. You’re lucky to have met him.”

You gave an enormous sniff and wiped your face with your sleeve. You punched Mori in the arm and he looked at you, surprised.

“You, me and Honey. That’s the way things should have stayed. Me talking your ear off during Math while Honey did my homework. You remember that? None of this Keiji bullshit. I didn’t know what love was. I was still playing volleyball. I was blissfully ignorant about the Host Club. Those were the days.”

You were putting up a brave front and Mori seemed to know it. Thankfully, he didn’t press it.

“Those can still be the days,” he said. “Volleyball season is starting up again.”

“Yeah, but my hours  with the Host Club are some that I can never get back.”

You got to your feet and pulled Mori up too, even though he didn’t need you.

“Let’s get back inside. They’re going to be wrapping up the gala soon and I want to know who won the competition.”

You were grateful for Mori’s quiet presence as you returned to the gala. He was steady and reassuring. He just understood you. You didn’t need to spell everything out for him.

And then panic doused you like ice water.

“Oh shit! I’m supposed to present the award cheque!”

“The what?”

“For the winner! The 300 000 yen!” Your parents loved the humongous display cheques used during lotteries and made a similar one every year for the gala. They’d asked you a few times to be the one to hand it off but you’d always declined. Your father had feigned a heart attack when you’d actually agreed this year. You’d feel even worse than you already did if they thought you had ditched them.

You started sprinting back to the dining hall and the stage, thanking your volleyball coach for all of those laps he’d forced on the team. You skidded into the dining hall just as the judges were wrapping up their closing remarks, startling a few of the back tables of people. You darted backstage, grabbed the giant cheque from a waiting stagehand and hurried up the stage steps, trying not to trip. 

“Oh! And there’s our prize money! Thought someone made off with it,” your father quipped as your mother shot you a dirty look. The audience chuckled and you plastered on a grin, brandishing the cheque in front of you. You even flipped it into the air, earning a few more chuckles. You thought you might have seen Keiji in the crowd, but you couldn’t be sure.

A mousy college student was announced as this year’s winner. When her work was brought forward, you weren’t surprised in the least to see it was the lane of sakura trees you and the twins had been admiring earlier. The college student gave a few words of thanks, expressing her hope to use the prize money to rent out a studio. There was more applause. Praise given to the runner-ups. You grinned broadly through it all, genuinely happy for the college student. Mostly, you just wanted to go home and throw yourself into bed to decompress.

The gala drew to a close. Your parents squeezed your shoulders and moved off to give obligatory farewells to sponsors and patrons. You hung around to help with dismantling the stage.

“Oi, we thought Keiji strangled you out there,” Hikaru called from below the stage as you were passing down set pieces. Somehow, the Host Club had taken over from the volunteers your parents had recruited.

“Nope. Still here,” you said, passing down a chair.

“Well what happened?” Renge said, practically drooling for gossip. “What did Keiji say?”

“That’s none of our business,” Haruhi said flatly.

“Thank you, Haruhi. All you need to know is that me and Keiji sorted things out. We set the record straight.”

“So you hugged and made up?” Honey said. “That’s great! I’m so glad!”

“As long as they didn’t kiss and make up,” Hikaru snickered, to which both Kaoru and Haruhi glared at him.

“You seem different,” Tamaki said as you passed down the last of the chairs. “Sad, but relieved. You are okay, right?”

Sad but relieved. That seemed about right. You had your closure now. You and Keiji hadn’t broken up. Only drifted apart because you hadn’t really been together to begin with.

You’re not going to cry until you’re alone in your bedroom, you internally snapped as your eyes started burning again.

Once the stage was cleared, you realized you hadn’t heard Kyoya’s droll voice at all. You wondered where he was until you realized he hadn’t bothered to help with the cleanup and was instead off in the corner, speaking to a few of the judges. Your mother had even drifted over there at some point and they all laughed at something he said.

Kiss-ass.

“Thanks for helping, everyone,” you said, dusting off your hands on your pants. “I think we should be good to go now.” You made to hop off the edge of the stage instead of using the stairs, too lazy to take them. It wasn’t that high off the ground anyway.

“Wait, don’t!” Haruhi yelled, but it was too late.

You had misjudged the distance from the stage to the ground. Or else your shoes had skidded on something. Whatever it was, instead of a neat hop, your foot slipped and then you were toppling off of the stage, letting out a strangled scream.

If it had been an anime or a manga, you might have righted yourself just in time and landed firmly on your feet with a cocky grin. Or Haruhi, being the closest person at the time, would grab your arm, saving you from a nasty fall.

But this unfortunately was cold, cruel reality. You tripped, your heart shooting into your throat. The only manga-like thing that happened was the astonishing speed that Mori had, rushing out to break your fall.

He didn’t catch you bridal-style, or even catch you at all, really. You knocked him to the ground with a loud crash that had to have broken something. By some twist of fate, you ended up on top of him—

—your mouth on his.

Chapter Text

It was not a kiss. You refused to even consider it as such. You had barely even touched Mori. Well, your mouth had barely grazed his, but you had unfortunately knocked him to the ground. Even though he assured you nothing was broken, you knew there had to be a cracked rib somewhere.

Mori took it well enough once you’d scrambled to your feet. Only a tinge of colour in his cheeks and his ruffled hair suggested anything had happened. Unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for the rest of the Host Club. Or the lingering guests who had witnessed the disaster. 

Or your mother, who now thought you had a secret boyfriend you should have told you about. In fact, she was so worked up about your clandestine relationship that she took you to Ouran the next day instead of your chauffeur, badgering you the entire drive.

“Come on, you can tell, sweetheart. Who was that? He’s very good looking, I won’t deny that. And so tall too. Who is it? He seems familiar.”

You kept up your stony silence. 

“Tell me!” she said. “I’ll call your school’s Chairman so I can find out. Would you rather that? Is he from that Academic Debate Club the twins were talking about?”

You slumped in your seat. “Mom. Please.”

You leapt out of her car as soon as it pulled up to Ouran’s gates, muttering a “Byemomthanksloveyou.” You scurried toward Ouran but then quickly found things weren’t much better here.

“What? Mori-san kissed someone last night?”

“Yes! They just flung themself at him! It was so dramatic!”

“Romantic, more like! I didn’t know Mori-san had a secret lover!”

Your face felt like a four-burner stove. The group of students you’d just overheard caught sight of you and giggled behind their hands.

“If we asked them, do you think they would tell us what Mori-san’s lips felt like?”

“Oh, I bet they were so soft!”

“What about his cologne? He must have smelt amazing!”

As a matter of fact, Mori had been wearing very nice cologne, but like hell were you going to say that out loud. You flipped up the collar of your blazer and hurried past. You were about two seconds away from would’ve flinging your blazer over your head, actually.

It seemed like the entire academy had nothing to talk about but Mori and his gala kiss. You couldn’t escape it. To your mortification, a few students actually walked up to you and asked you to describe what had happened. You might as well have gone to heaven and come back for all the reverence they gave you.

“Nothing happened,” was the response you gave every time. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Nonetheless, the gossip swirled thick, and by lunchtime, you were Mori’s ravished lover, flinging yourself into his strong, capable arms. Fearing for your sanity, you decided to have lunch outside, by the fountain with the kid pissing.

You knew it was only a matter of time until the Host Club found you, and sure enough they did. You spotted Haruhi, Kyoya and Renge coming towards you from the hedges. You were relieved and scared in equal measure.

“Hey. How are you holding up?” Haruhi asked first. Her smile said everything she didn’t. It was slightly amused, sympathetic, and pitiful all at once.

“I’m contemplating transferring schools overseas, thanks for asking.”

“My siblings studied at various prestigious institutions overseas, as a matter of fact,” Kyoya said, because of course he couldn’t resist. “I can ask them to recommend a few.”

You gave him a false grin. “Thanks, Kyoya. You’re so helpful.”

Renge looked like she was going to explode so you resigned yourself and cut to the chase.

“Are we going to have to do damage control on this whole Mori situation?”

“What happened?!” Renge burst out. Haruhi and Kyoya winced. “You and Mori kissed last night! Just like that! We sent Mori to check on you not to fall in love with you! What’s going on? Are you together now?”

“Renge,” Haruhi said through gritted teeth. “Bring it down a notch.”

“Well, are you?” Renge demanded.

You let out a long-suffering sigh. You set aside your bento box, folded your hands in your lap, looked Renge dead in the eye, and said, “Yes. Mori and I are together now. We decided last night.”

Renge’s “WHAT?”   would have put an opera singer to shame. Haruhi and Kyoya seemed to know better though, cocking an eyebrow and readjusting his  glasses, respectively.

“Renge, you make it too easy,” you said, laughing. “No. Nothing is going on. I just tripped and accidentally knocked Mori over. That’s all. Honest. It wasn’t a kiss.”

“It certainly looked like one,” Renge said adamantly. “Can you really blame us? You looked so forlorn after your talk with Keiji, of course we thought you were going to throw yourself at the first attractive person you saw!”

“I—Renge, that’s hurtful. Do you really think so little of me?”

“She thinks like that of everyone,” Haruhi said.

“Let it be known that in no way are Renge’s thoughts and opinions reflective of the Host Club,” Kyoya added.

Renge poked your cheek. “So you’re not with Mori?”

“No.”

Kyoya rolled his eyes at Renge. “You were the only person who needed proof of that. In any case, the damage, however unintentional, has been done. We’re going to need you to issue a statement and apologize for your behaviour.”

You gawked at him. “Am I an influencer or something? I didn’t do anything. It was an accident! I already apologized—profusely—to Mori, and he said it was fine!”

“You’re a member of the Host Club,” Kyoya said, as though that explained everything. “You have caused much distress to Mori’s regular guests. Our revenue is going to decrease significantly if guests believe Mori is taken.”

“What Kyoya means to say,” Haruhi said, elbowing him, “Is that we want to tamp down on the rumours. You know how bad gossip at Ouran can get. We just want to make sure no one gets the wrong idea so they leave you and Mori alone.”

Thank the heavens for Haruhi. 

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” you said. “It would probably be a good idea to clear things up. I kind of feel bad for Mori. I hope he’s doing alright.”

“Mori is doing just fine,” Renge sniffed. “He’s more than used to dealing with things like this.”

You scoffed, although you supposed that out of everyone, the Stoic Type would have been the best one to be caught up in a situation like this. It was a good thing you hadn’t fallen on top of Tamaki. Or the twins.

You felt yourself getting embarrassed. Why the hell were you thinking about something like that?

You cleared your throat. “Alright then. What’s first for damage control?”

Kyoya blinked when you looked at him pointedly. “The Host Club guidelines state that in the situation of false rumours, it is up to the hosts involved to deal with it however they see fit.”

Meaning: Kyoya didn’t have a clue.

“It’s probably best to ask Mori what he wants to do,” Haruhi said. “Maybe see what Tamaki has to say too.”

You nodded. “Yeah. That’s probably best.”

It was just a matter of whether you would be able to survive until the end of the day to actually go to Music Room 3.

“Worry not. As the manager of the Host Club, I will do everything in my power to ensure these outlandish rumours do not rage out of control,” Renge declared, setting a hand on your shoulder.

Her words didn’t reassure you in the slightest. If you knew anything about the lady manager, she had probably started half those rumours in the first place.

“Just keep your head down and don’t make any incendiary remarks,” Kyoya said. “If it comes to it, you can always fall back on your Tragic Type personality.”

If things continued the way they were, your tragicness wouldn’t be an act at all.

♡ .⁺

As it turned out, Kyoya was right about falling back on your Tragic Type personality. Someone would approach you, ask about Mori, and all you had to do was hang your head and make it look like you were on the verge of tears. It scared people off very quickly. For the rest of the afternoon, no one approached you for fear of initiating waterworks. Things were almost normal when you finally ducked into Music Room 3.

“Oh, loverboy!”

“Casanova!”

“Romeo!”

“Heartthrob!”

“I am going to punch both of you in the throat,” you gritted out.

“Did you enjoy your smooch with Mori last night?” Hikaru asked, unperturbed.

“Yeah, the two of you were getting pretty comfortable,” Kaoru said.

“It. Was. An. Accident.”

“You remember when we asked you about public displays of affection?” Kaoru said. He smiled cherubically at you. “I guess that means you like kisses, don’t you?”

You stormed past the twins. You looked around for Renge before remembering she was absent to quash rumours for you. You went to Tamaki instead, who was cutting a slice of cake for Honey.

You put your hands together in a begging motion. “Your Highness, please tell me how I can stop all of this.”

He raised an eyebrow, passing you a slice of cake too. “Your Highness now, huh? I could get used to that.”

“Please. I don’t know how you all do it, but I can’t handle this kind of attention.” You accepted a fork from Honey and put a huge bite of cake into your mouth.

“People haven’t been mean to you, have they?” Honey asked, his eyes wide. “I keep telling people you didn’t mean to kiss Taka-chan but no one believes me.”

You swallowed. “Where is Mori?”

Tamaki licked a bit of frosting off of his fingers. “I’m not sure. He might be busy with kendo practice, but he usually lets us know beforehand.”

You were sure it was nothing. You told yourself not to think the worst.

“What should I do, Tamaki? I don’t want people to get the wrong idea or anything. Mori was just trying to help.”

“You probably don’t have to do anything,” Tamaki said. “It’ll pass. But if you really want to make things clear, you could make a small announcement after club activities today. Tell everyone that nothing nefarious is going on between you and our stoic soldier.”

You side-eyed him. “Nefarious?”

Tamaki grinned. “Just something I heard.”

“Actually, Tamaki, there was something else I wanted to talk to you about.”

“You’re not going to be able to go to the Host Club anymore,” Honey said before you could. You looked at him in surprise.

“Volleyball season is coming up soon. You’re going to be busy with practice, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, I am.” You set down your plate. “I just wanted to make sure that was okay with you and the club, Tamaki. I was thinking that next week would be my last day.”

Tamaki was misty-eyed. “Oh, of course. I don’t mind at all. Kyoya might be upset but he’ll find some other way to make up for lost profit.”

“I’ll be upset too,” Honey said. “It was fun having you around!”

You smiled. “I think it’s fitting. I know it’s a little over the two weeks that Renge originally gave us, but to be honest, I really think you actually managed to heal—”

“Good afternoon, everyone. Sorry I’m late.”

Mori entered the music room just then, his tie slightly askew and his hair ruffled. He smiled and the entire room stared. It wasn’t like he wasn’t allowed to smile, you had just never seen him smile so brightly.

“What are you working on, Vice President?” Mori asked, looking over Kyoya’s shoulder at his laptop as he passed by. Kyoya did a double take and partially closed his laptop. 

“You’re late today, Mori.”

“I apologize again. I must have lost track of time. It’s such a wonderful day out today.”

It was very cloudy today, but sure. Wonderful.

Mori crossed over to Haruhi “Your hair looks wonderful today, Haruhi.” To your surprise, he leaned over her and inhaled deeply. “It smells wonderful too.”

Haruhi’s cheeks were pink. “Um. Thanks?”

“Who are you—” Kaoru said.

“—And what have you done with Mori-san?” Hikaru finished.

“You two never stop with the jokes, do you?” Mori wrestled Hikaru under his arm and ruffled his hair.

This was uncanny. Maybe you were dreaming?

“What’s wrong with Mori?” you asked out of the corner of your mouth to Tamaki and Honey. 

Honey gave a thin-lipped smile. “He’s probably just—”

“Honey! Strawberry cake again? Without inviting me?” Mori hovered over your shoulder now, reaching over you for a plate. He swiped a finger through the frosting and tasted it, grinning. “Now that’s a cake. Did Tamaki order it?”

“That was my plate,” you murmured. You shouldn’t have said anything though, because Mori’s attention fixed on you suddenly.

“Well hello,” he said, his voice dipping. His gaze didn’t leave yours as he replaced the plate of cake. He tipped his head. “How are you today?”

“Um, fine. What about you? Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m feeling wonderful, now that you’re here.”

Someone let out a strangled sound. Probably Tamaki, because it sounded like Mori had ripped a page directly out of his playbook.

You were tempted to check Mori’s temperature. His blood-alcohol content too.

Mori glided his fingers over your jaw, tilting up your head. 

“I’ve been thinking about you,” he said softly. “I can’t seem to get last night out of my head. I wonder if it’s the same for you?”

Your stomach swooped. “What do you mean?”

“What if we did it again? What we did last night?”

Mori leaned down. His fingers slid behind your neck, and the distance between the two you closed.

It was an accident! you thought wildly. An accident!

Wasn’t it?

“Mori, you must be feeling awfully tired,” Tamaki said, jolting the two of you apart. He gracefully led Mori to a settee that hadn’t been there a minute before and carefully helped him lie down. Kyoya draped a blanket over him and Honey began humming a sweet lullaby. Within minutes, Mori was out like a light.

Your heart was racing. “What was that? ”

“Taka-chan gets like that when he’s tired,” Honey said, breathing a sigh of relief. He tucked in Usa-chan under the blanket beside Mori.

“Oh yeah, he does,” Kaoru said. “Very extroverted. Very talkative.”

“Very flirtatious,” Hikaru added.

“This has happened before?” Your voice sounded pinched.

“Only once,” Haruhi said, smoothing a hand over her hair. “It’s no less terrifying, though.”

“Well I think it’s sweet,” Tamaki said, patting Mori’s head. 

Kyoya was rubbing his eyes beneath his glasses. “No, Haruhi is correct. When Mori gets like this, the best thing to do is make him fall asleep. Immediately.”

Tamaki pouted. “You don’t have any complaints when I act like that, though.”

“Yeah, because when you do it, it’s harmless,” Hikaru said.

Kaoru grinned. “But when Mori does it, he means business.”

And it was off to the skulk corner for Tamaki. You were too busy trying to get your face under control to notice. Why was your face so hot? Maybe you were the one with fever.

“I think it’s best if we call off club activities today,” Kyoya said wearily. “We’re down two hosts and someone looks like they’re about to faint. Hopefully Renge’s interventions were successful and the rumours will simmer down over the weekend. We should be able to resume regular activities next week.”

“Mori is going to go back to normal, right?” you asked Honey. He smiled at you.

“Yep! All he needs is a little nap!”

“Does that mean you were keeping Mori up all night?” Hikaru crowed.

You almost combusted right then and there. You knew it was bad when even Kyoya had to hide a smile.

Chapter Text

You had made it very clear that you didn’t want anything out of the ordinary for your last day at the Host Club. You just wanted to go about club activities like usual and maybe have a small announcement at the end of the day that you would no longer be a host. The Mori debacle had thankfully died out over the weekend; you didn’t want to stir things up again. Just a nice, quiet afternoon with the Host Club before you ducked out. 

But you knew as soon as you opened the music room doors and a swirl of confetti that greeted you that you would not be having a nice, quiet afternoon. 

“Happy Last Day!” The cheer was so loud you actually stumbled back a step. You opened the door wider to find the music room absolutely packed. Every single one of the Host Club’s guests must have shown up today.

There was raucous applause and cheering, and more confetti rained down on you. A piece stabbed you in the eye and you swore under your breath.

In a choreographed movement, the crowd parted down the middle, revealing a scarlet carpet running length of the room. At its end was Tamaki, sprawled over a throne like an errant prince. 

He smiled at you, his violet eyes gleaming. Extending a graceful hand, he said, “Come forward, my fair knight.”

Well. This was something. 

You shuffled forward, only now realizing that everyone was in various states of royal dress, wide dresses and cravats and waistcoats. Kyoya wasn’t going to scold you for forgetting your costume, was he? You hadn’t even known you were supposed to dress up today.

You finally stopped in front of Tamaki, your scalp prickling from the weight of everyone’s stares. Fanned out on either side of Tamaki were the hosts, their armour practically blinding you. If the twins were supposed to have given you your own suit of armour, they hadn’t delivered.

Someone coughed pointedly. You glanced around, then noticed Renge mouthing at you to kneel. You did so.

“You have served us well during your tenure here,” Tamaki began. His voice rang around the room. “In your time as our Tragic Host, you have upheld the tenets of the Host Club, consistently displaying the qualities of an engaging, considerate host. You have been kind and courteous, and no one can deny that you have been a paragon of manner and class.” 

Your mouth twitched. This sounded familiar. Kyoya had probably written this script for Tamaki, even though you had never once cracked open his obscenely large handbook folder.

Tamaki caught your eye and seemed to hide a laugh. 

“You have been a joy to have around, and we’ll be sad to see you go. We wish you the best in all of your future endeavours. You will always have a place here at the Host Club.”

You just managed to stifle a gasp as Kyoya languidly passed Tamaki a sword. He lightly rested the blade on each of your shoulders before bidding you to rise.

“Henceforth you will bear the seal of the Host Club. Let it be known that you will always be under our protection, no matter the circumstance.”

Everyone broke out into applause as the twins stepped forward and slipped a sash over your head. It was a bizarre mix between beauty pageant and medieval knighting, but you decided not to question it.

An expectant hush descended on the room as you turned to face the crowd. You didn’t have anything prepared, but it seemed right to say something just then.

“Well, um, hey everyone. If you've been around lately, you probably know me as the Tragic Type host.” How did Keiji just get up and do this everyday? It was too difficult to face the guests, so you turned around to look at the hosts instead.

“I actually joined the Host Club while I was having a pretty rough time. I wasn’t feeling the greatest, and that’s where my host persona came from. If I’m being honest, there were some times when I wasn’t acting, and I genuinely was feeling that miserable.

“The Host Club thought they would be able to help me. That they would help me feel like myself again. I never believed them. To be honest, they seemed like the last people who should be helping me.”

A few guests laughed. Haruhi smiled but Renge looked furious.

“But the more time I spent with the Host Club, the more I realized that they were serious. They’re perceptive and considerate and caring. They push you when you need to be, but they look out for you. They’ll have your back and make you laugh and they’ll just—” Your tongue stalled for a beat as it hit you all at once. Everything the Host Club had done for you, intentional or otherwise. You hadn’t realized it, but the moment you had stepped into Music Room 3, the entire Host Club had been in your corner. 

“They’ll put you back together again,” you said, probably too quietly for anyone but the hosts to hear. “They’ll believe in you.”

Honey and Renge were trying not to cry. Mori might have sniffled but you had probably imagined it. Kaoru was hiding his mouth behind his hand and Hikaru was staring fixedly at his shoes. Haruhi’s smile trembled and for once, Kyoya actually seemed to admire what you were saying.

And Tamaki’s expression was so full of feeling it tugged on your heart.

“Thank you for everything, guys,” you said, smiling wide. “You and this ridiculous club.” 

And then, before any tears started flowing, you clapped your hands together. “Alright, enough of the sappiness. Let’s get on with the hosting.”

♡ .⁺ 

You found Renge near the windows, fanning herself with a hilariously large fan. You remembered wanting to curse her name into the ground but now you felt a stilted affection for her. Like how you felt about a prickly tarantula, maybe. 

“Renge, can I hug you?”

Renge made a face. “Heavens, no. That would be unseemly for a society lady.” 

You scoffed and pulled Renge into a hug. She protested weakly but hugged you back.

“You know, if it weren’t for you, I never would have joined the Host Club.”

“I know. You should name your firstborn after me.”

“That is a no, but regardless, thank you for being manipulative and guilt tripping me.”

“You’re welcome!” Renge blinked. “Wait, what?”

You laughed. “I owe you one, Renge.”

“Why don’t you just fall in love with another devastating young man with beautiful hair? Then we could do this all over again.”

“I will never understand what goes on in that head of yours.”

“It’s part of my feminine mystique.”

“It’s part of something alright.”

♡ .⁺ 

You had to wait for the perfect moment, but at last, Hikaru propped his elbow on Kaoru’s shoulder like you knew he would and you pounced, wrestling the two of them into one of your volleyball tackles.

“Since when are you allowed to kill people on your last day?” Kaoru gasped.

“Manslaughter is not going to look good on your record,” Hikaru wheezed.

You tousled the twins’ hair, probably harder than strictly necessary. “I might actually miss you two during volleyball season. I won’t have anyone to harass my sanity anymore.”

“It was our pleasure,” Karou said solemnly.

“It was our duty, actually,” Hikaru sniffed.

The twins twisted out of your grasp. You watched, amused, as they both flipped a cap onto their heads.

“We realize you never got to do this—” one of the twins said, 

“—so let’s play the Which One is Hikaru Game! ” the other twin finished.

“Oh no,” you said flatly. “I can’t see which way you parted your hair. How will I ever know who is who?”

The twins each raised an eyebrow. You shook your head, smiling, then pointed to the left. “Well, I guess this one is Kaoru, and this one is Hikaru. Hikaru is going to tell me I’m wrong, and then Kaoru is going to tell me to try again.”

The twins looked at each other. 

“You can really tell, can’t you?” Kaoru said softly.

You gave a jaunty shrug. “Nope. Just a lucky guess.”

♡ .⁺ 

As soon as Haruhi’s guest left, you slipped into the seat across from her. Her face brightened as she reached for the pot of tea but you beat her to it.

“You’re always the one pouring tea. Let me do it for once.”

“So it’s your last day,” she said, accepting the cup and saucer you gave her. “How are you feeling?”

“I wasn’t expecting to be knighted, but honestly, I’m not too sad. I’ll still stop by to visit you guys. And despite everything, you’re still my favourite host, Haruhi.”

Haruhi smiled into her cup. “I’m flattered.”

“You shouldn’t be. There’s a reason the “natural” type is so popular.” You smirked. “I can barely find time to talk to you most days.”

“Actually listening to people goes a long way. Most people just want someone there so they can talk.”

“You’re a great listener,” you said quietly. “You actually think about what people say and you’re never judgemental. I could talk to you for hours.”

Haruhi looked at you, her eyes wide. You still thought she had beautiful eyes. They were a reflection of everything she didn’t say.

“I wanted to thank you for being there for me. You got me through a lot of this Keiji stuff--the pillar of reason. I hope the Host Club knows it would fall apart if it weren’t for you.”

Haruhi looked off to the side. “Don’t give me too much credit. Most days I’m not doing anything special.”

“But it’s always more than enough,” you said. You rose from your seat to squeeze her into a side hug. 

“Maybe I should buy one of your pencils from the club auction site so I can you’re really my favourite host.”

“Please don’t,” Haruhi said, pained. “No wonder my pencils keep going missing.”

♡ .⁺ 

“I saved you a pastry!”

You took the plate from Honey with a grin. “I’m going to miss this. They don’t feed me half as well on the volleyball team.”

“They don’t feed you at all on the volleyball team,” Mori said.

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Are you sure you’re okay, big guy? I feel like I might have dislodged your brains when I fell on you at the gala. You’ve been acting extremely out of character.”

“He was just tired,” Honey insisted. “He’s all back to normal now, right, Taka-chan?”

Mori shrugged. You thought he might have been hiding a smile.

You bit into the flaky pastry and sighed. “I guess I’m supposed to thank the two of you for dragging into the Host Club, huh?”

“I told you everything would work out!” Honey said brightly. “You kept doubting me! If you had given up, you would still be hung up about Keiji!”

“You don’t know that. I probably would have been fine. I definitely wouldn’t have suffered so much public embarrassment.”

“Embarrassment never killed anyone,” Mori said. You punched his arm. 

“Don’t act like half of that embarrassment wasn’t your fault. Anyway, I’m not too wrung up about the two of you. We’re literally going to see each other during Math tomorrow.”

“But you won’t be a host anymore,” Honey said, pouting. “You’re always so busy during volleyball season. We barely ever get to see you.”

“I’ll try my best to visit. Maybe you guys could even come to one of my games?  I bet my coach would like the turnout.”

“That would be fun! I’m a great cheerleader!”

You ruffled Honey’s hair. “For sure.”

Honey ran off then to refill his plate. You were about to get up too when Mori brushed your arm.

“About what happened.”

You tried to hide your spike of nervousness. “Yeah?”

Mori’s gaze was steady. “I didn’t … I didn’t dislike what happened.”

You stared at Mori. He stared at you back and for beat, the two of you were the only ones in the room.

You pulled on a rakish grin. “I hope you’re not saying what I think you’re saying.”

Mori’s smile was faintly amused. “What am I saying?”

“I don’t really know. But maybe I should find out.”

“Maybe you should.”

♡ .⁺ 

You didn’t get a chance to talk to Tamaki or Kyoya until the day was over and guests began clearing out of the music room. As it were, the three of you waved the final guests goodbye, and once Kyoya greeted the crew responsible for dismantling everything, you all  left the academy.

“So what’s my status now?” you asked, Tamaki and Kyoya walking on either side of you. “Honorary Host? Esteemed Guest? You did say I would always have a place in the Host Club.”

“Of course! We can’t have our Tragic Host abandoning us completely!” Tamaki cried.

Kyoya nodded. “You’ll be able to enjoy a twenty-percent discount for each visit.” 

“You’re kidding. I still have to pay? I’m practically one of you guys!”

“If you aren’t a host, you’re a guest. Guests are required to pay.”

“Tamaki!” you whined.

Tamaki squinted at Kyoya. “Well, I suppose if you were to use the Black Magic Room to get into the music room, no one could stop you.”

“This is too much work. I’ll just never visit then.”

“Suit yourself,” Kyoya said coldly. Tamaki made a wounded noise.

Something nudged the back of your mind. You thought it was a silly thing to ask, especially now that everything had wrapped up, but you would always wonder if you didn’t ask.

“I have a question for the two of you.”

“Will horrors never cease?” Kyoya deadpanned.

You bit the inside of your cheek. “I mean, maybe I’m thinking about this wrong, but with your heartbreak treatment—did any of that have to do with—did you want to make me fall in love with you?”

Tamaki and Kyoya exchanged glances. A blush began creeping up Tamaki’s face.

“Do you know what the true purpose of the Host Club is?” Kyoya asked carefully.

“Not in any polite terms, no,” you replied, to which Kyoya rolled his eyes.

“When I first created the club, I only had one goal,” Tamaki said, his voice rueful. He smiled bashfully when you looked at him. “I just wanted to make people happy. That was all.”

It was a ridiculously simple answer that shouldn’t have justified anything. But somehow, it did.

The three of you reached the front entrance. You raised a hand to block the afternoon sunlight.

“If nothing else, I’ll at least give you credit where it’s due. You really did manage to heal my broken heart.”

Tamaki gaped at you. Kyoya’s eyes gleamed triumphantly.

“I’m going to need you to say that again,” he said. “For the record.”

“Is this going into your obscenely large handbook?”

“Of course. I’ve been writing out a protocol concerning broken hearts. You’re going to be the validating evidence.”

“But you didn’t know what you were doing. Mori said I was your first case.”

Kyoya wasn’t smug. He looked pleased. Maybe even happy.

“I had perfect confidence that we would be successful,” he said.

♡ .⁺

disce end.

─────

© cophene 2024

Chapter Text

There we have it. 24 chapters later, we are at the end of Disce.

Of course I have to thank Bisco Hatori and everyone responsible for bringing OHSHC together. Even if we never get that second season, we did at least get one and the manga did things to my heart, not going to lie. Major props to them for making me giggle and kick my feet in the air.

Inspiration for this fic probably came from reading other people's fics. One good thing about being part of an older fandom is the wealth of fanwork you can find, and all of the fics and fanart fed me well.

My main goal for this fic was to write something light and fluffy and just to spend some time vibing with the Host Club. I just wanted to get my feet wet and see what writing for OHSHC would be like. I wanted to get a feel for the characters and how to write their dynamics. I hope I was able to find a balance between the ridiculousness OHSHC is known for and some of the deeper characterization. Some of my favourite moments from the series was when we got to take a step back and see all of the hosts outside of the club. While I didn't include much of that in this fic, it's definitely something I'd like to explore.

Adding on to that, because this fic is a various x reader (sorta haha), I didn't get to delve as much into the characters as I would have liked. All of the characters have interesting backgrounds and family dynamics that I think would be fun to get into. In the future, I'd probably dedicate a separate fic for each host so we can see more of them outside of the club. Aspects like Kyoya being the youngest child, Tamaki's relationship with his father, the twins' and their identity ... there's some good stuff. I'd love to dive into it :')

Regardless, I tried to incorporate a bit of the hosts' backstory into the fic as much as I could. It would have been nice to explore everyone more in-depth, but then this fic would have been massive and gone on forever. Oh well.

I had a great time writing this fic. I loved thinking up new interactions for everyone and just describing their day to day activities. I especially loved writing for Hikaru and Kyoya. They're probably at least a little out of character, but the sass was non negotiable. I also found that roping Renge into it all was necessary. Sometimes I forget she's part of the Host Club but she always makes me laugh.

Also in the future, I'd like to include more characters from OHSHC besides the hosts. Ranka Kasanoda, Nekozawa... I have a feeling I could make some chaos for them >:).

Thank you so much for reading this fic! Whether you were here from the beginning or you're just stopping by, thank you for giving me a bit of your time. I appreciated every comment and heart this fic got. I hope this fic made you smile :DD

Let me know if you have any questions about the fic or have anything you might want to say. Hopefully I'll see you in some of my other fics. But if not, thank you again for reading. Here's to more OHSHC to come.

— from pace with love.