Work Text:
7-13-15
Prompt: I’m an amputee, and when I was getting out of my car I got yelled at by a guy for using the handicap spot so I took off my prosthetic leg and threw it at them. You watched this happen and are laughing so hard you had to use your inhaler. AU
Pairing: BoKuroo
Rating: T
The world is full of assholes, Kuroo mused to himself as he clambered out of his car, bracing himself for the rant that he could feel coming.
The man was probably in his late forties, his comb over not quite covering his bald spot and his face bloated and red. He looked lke he might have been a pretty cool guy once, but now, as he was preparing to shout at Kuroo, he didn’t look like anything but an idiot.
“You damn teenagers,” the man snarled. “Don’t you know those spots are only for people with disabilities?”
“Sir, I have-“ Kuroo started.
“No, don’t interrupt me, you brat!” the man cut in. “I tell you, I have had it up to here with everyone in your generation thinking they can just take whatever they want! You punks wouldn’t know the beginning of real pain! In my day we would have turned someone like you over the knee for your behavior! Honestly, taking away a disabled spot just so you could be that much closer to the door, how much lazier could you get? I bet you’re just rebelling, right? What kind of people raise a kid like you, all-“
Kuroo listened to the man’s rant with a blank expression. He had heard it all before, but this one was being particularly long-winded.
And repetitive.
Around the third time he said the words ‘teenage rebellion’ Kuroo reached his limit. Still half-listening to the man shout, he bent down and rolled up his left pant leg. Leaning back against his car he unbuckled the straps that held the prosthetic in place and eased it off of the stub at the end of his thigh. With the same blank expression he hefted his leg into the air and chucked it at the man in front of him.
“Oh my god you actually did it!” wheezed a familiar voice. Kuroo turned to wink and grin at Bokuto, who was doubled over near Kuroo’s back bumper. “I mean, I always wanted to see you actually hit someone with it, but bro! That was brilliant!” The yelling man was staring at the leg on the ground in front of him, a befuddled look on his face.
“Hey, bro, could you grab my leg for me?” Kuroo asked. “I kinda got a surge of teenage rebellion and threw it at someone.” At that, Bokuto laughed so hard he topple over onto his ass, clutching his sides and chortling. The man sputtered, looking between him, Kuroo, and Kuroo’s leg, then spun on his heel and stormed off. Bokuto was wheezing and digging in his pockets. “Shit, you okay, man?” Kuroo asked, hopping in his direction. Bokuto held up a hand, taking a shaky puff on his inhaler.
“If you don’t stop right now, I’m going to die,” Bokuto said, still laughing. He stuffed the inhaler back in his pocket, taking slow, even breaths to get himself under control. “Alright, I’m good,” he said after a moment.
“Good,” Kuroo said. “Because I was serious about you getting my leg.”
Bokuto burst out laughing again and Kuroo groaned, internally bemoaning how late they were going to be.
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