Chapter Text
the gays solve the gas crisis
dazai added 20+ members
dazai: kunikida asked me to make this groupchat for an upcoming surprise!!!!
Kunikida: Osamu, what is this name supposed to mean?
dazai: what?? kunikida, are you homophobic?? :((
Kunikida: I’m bisexual.
atsushi: does that mean you have a section in ur notebook for ur ideal man???
Kunikida: Yes, but that’s not important.
Kunikida: @everyone, we are going on a trip to America along with the Port Mafia and the Guild. There is still a lot to be planned, but we will make sure that everyone is properly accommodated.
ranpo: we get to share rooms right
Kunikida: Yes.
ranpo: YAY
ranpo: do I get to choose???
Kunikida: No, but if you’re uncomfortable with who we choose for you, it can be changed.
ranpo: who is it :3
Kunikida: Poe.
ranpo: YAY
lucy: im late but woah this is exciting
atsushi: HI LUCY
lucy: HI ATSUSHI
akutagawa: are we allowed to not go??
atsushi: yes, please stay home nobody wants you here
akutagawa: go fuck yourself.
atsushi: DIE
Mori: To answer your question, no! It will be a good bonding activity!
akutagawa: Alright, boss.
atsushi: …dickrider…
dazai: THIS IS MY FAVORITE THING TO COME BACK TO
atsushi: of course you come back at the mention of dickriding.
dazai: ATSUSHI????
chuuya: ew ew ew die
dazai: u first :3
Fitzgerald: Has Kunikida explained the hotel situation?
Kunikida: Not yet.
Fitzgerald: I’ll go ahead then!
Fitzgerald: Although there are a lot of funds with the Guild, Port Mafia, and the Agency combined, but we would still like to save as much money as possible! Because of that, there will be four people in one room, meaning beds will have to be shared. However, we are obviously not going to decide who will share with who, so you could sleep on the floor if you want!
atsushi: this could go very terribly or it could go very terribly
dazai: don’t you want to know your roomates, atsushiii???
atsushi: no i think i’m good!!
dazai: that’s too bad!!
dazai: you’ll be sharing with me, kunikida, and akutagawa!!!
atsushi: this is a threat to my life dazai
atsushi: i am going to be murdered in my sleep
Kunikida: We won’t allow that.
atsushi: YOU CAN’T GUARANTEE THAT
akutagawa: i won’t try to kill you.
atsushi: WHY SHOULD I TRUST YOU
lucy: who am i sharing a room with?
Kunikida: You will be sharing with Alcott, Gin Akutagawa, and Higuchi.
gin: woah pulling out the full name
Kunikida: I apologize, but most people think of your brother when they hear “Akutagawa.”
gin: it’s fine!!
lucy: is this gonna be a room full of lesbians
gin: i believe so
lucy: exciting
akutagawa: you and the weretiger aren’t dating????
lucy: ew no
lucy: why would I ever date anyone with those bangs
atsushi: LUCY.
akutagawa: LMAO
atsushi: LIKE YOU CAN BE TALKING AKUTAGAWA
gin: I know right??
akutagawa: YOU WERE THE ONE WHO CUT THEM??
gin: was I?? I’m not sure i remember that!!
atsushi: can we pls be best friends
gin: omg yes
lucy: am i being replaced??
atsushi: nobody could ever replace my best friend ever!!!!!
lucy: awwww
ranpo: n e ways, who am I sharing with apart from ed
ranpo: yosano and kouyou right?
Kunikida: Yes.
yosano: LETS GO
yosano: oh thank god dude shes so hot
kouyou: ...I'm quite flattered.
yosano: winks
higuchi: oh this is so real
lucy: hi roommate
higuchi: ?
gin: read up!!
higuchi: oh, how exciting!!
higuchi: i’m not sure i’ve met alcott yet
lucy: ur missing out!!
atsushi: we all know that ur gay lucy
lucy: i could tell everyone about your little rants about a certain someone but I won’t cause i’m nice
atsushi: you nearly drowned me.
lucy: I APOLOGIZE LITERALLY EVERY DAY
akutagawa: you shouldn’t.
atsushi: can you shut up for ONE SECOND
akutagawa: no.
alcott: is this a bad time? (￣ω￣;)
ranpo: is using kaomoji a guild thing or smth??
lucy: HI LOUISA
alcott: hi lucy!! ( ^ ω ^)
poe: hi all, am I late? (°▽°)/
ranpo: yes, i missed u :((
poe: ah, i’m sorry, my dear ranpo (×﹏×)
alcott: hi poe!!
poe: hi alcott!!
Kunikida: As much as I like that this group is (mostly) getting along, I’d prefer if we toned down the off-topic chat.
dazai: now that’s just asking too much, kunikida!!
Kunikida: I’ll finish telling you all the room assignments, and then most of you should get some sleep.
Kunikida: Kenji, Kyouka, Yumeno, and Elise are in a group, Tachihara, Chuuya, Kaiji, and Hirotsu are in a room, and Fitzgerald, Fukuzawa, and Mori are in a group. DM me with any complaints.
Kunikida: Goodnight everyone. We leave two weeks from now. Airplane seats will be decided a week before we leave. You’ll be able to decide who you sit with.
Kunikida went offline.
atsushi: junichiro isn’t coming?
dazai: naomi isn’t coming, so he decided he wouldn’t either.
akutagawa: I thought we HAD to go?
dazai: junichiro is relentless.
akutagawa: I see. Sorry for doubting you, Dazai.
atsushi: DICKRIDERRRRR
akutagawa: SHUT UP
atsushi: talking to you exhausts me
atsushi: i’m going to bed
atsushi went offline.
lucy: @higuchi @gin @alcott do you guys wanna meet up together soon to get to know eachother?
higuchi: sure!!
gin: yes yes yes
alcott: i would love to! (*¯︶¯*)
lucy: okay! I’ll make us a groupchat to establish the time, but for now im going to sleep
lucy: gn lesbians!!
lucy went offline.
everyone went offline