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Karl walked through the doorway to the homey apartment, heart pulsing in his chest, sight blurry, and hands shaking. He could hear the electricity, the tapping of keys, the hum of the aircon, the faint music from down the hall, and the quiet chatter from the TV. He felt like he could hear everything. It all felt like too much, but he needed to keep himself together, as having another meltdown would be embarrassing. He was supposed to be normal, or rather he needed to be. How else could he be there for his boyfriends? For Sapnap and Quackity who gave everything they could for him? Letting himself go would be selfish, and another burden on their shoulders. So he squared himself up, tossed his bag and shoes next to the doorway, and darted for the bathroom.
He kept the lights off, and took deep, long breaths to try and keep himself at bay. All he has to do is say hello to his husbands, and then lock himself back into the bathroom, he’ll be fine. He reached into the sink, turning on the faucet and splashing the cold water onto his face, hoping it would help. But unfortunately for him, it did the exact opposite. He felt the wetness seep into his pores, and it made his face feel heavy and soggy.
Tears brimmed his eyes as his fists clenched and unclenched. It took everything in him to not scratch his skin off to get rid of the awful feeling. Instead, he grabbed a nearby towel, rubbing his face into the fabric. But even that felt offensive against his skin, and he let out a shallow sob.
He frantically wiped his eyes, breathing deeply, before darting out of the bathroom. I need to get this over with, he thought, sauntering over to one of the rooms down the hall from the restroom, quietly knocking on the door.
“Come in!” one of the two replied.
Karl cracked the door open, peeking inside, before being bombarded by the sound of the music, loud and heavy in the air. He had to resist the urge to cover his ears and scream for it to stop. It all felt like too much, his ears were starting to hurt from the stimulation. He felt the tears well up again, the frog in his throat clawing at him to be released.
Karl opened his mouth to say something, anything, but nothing came out. His throat felt clenched, and he reached a hand up to scratch at it.
At that motion, Quackity raised his eyebrows, sitting up, “Karl? Babe, what's wrong?”
Upon not receiving much response other than Karl’s piercing stare, he shoved Sapnap for help, not really understanding what was wrong with the brunette.
Sapnap gave him a what the fuck? Look, before Quackity pointed at Karl.
“Oh, oh, oh.” It didn’t even take him another second before he got up, slinking over to Karl with as much gentleness as he could muster.
He reached out to grab him, but as soon as he made contact, Karl let out a loud sob, recoiling in onto himself. He grumbled under his shallow breaths, and his whole body was shaking.
Sapnap looked to Quackity, his eyes wide and fearful. They didn’t fully understand what was happening, and were unsure of what to do.
“Karl, what can we do for you right now, hun? We can’t help if you don’t tell us.” Quackity whispered to him, laying a hand on his quivering shoulder.
Karl’s eyes were looking at the floor, and his hands were clenched so tight his knuckles had turned white. He reached them up, and made a grabbing motion. When the two didn’t respond, he took his hands, and squished them together. They looked at each other, then back at karl.
“You want to be held?” Sapnap cautiously asked. Karl shook his head slightly, repeating the same motions. “So you don’t want to be held?” Karl shook his head harder, pointing at them, then at himself, and then doing repeating the movements again.
“Do you want to be squished?” Quackity asked. He had remembered Karl mentioning something about enjoying the feeling of someone putting immense amounts of pressure on him (or being squashed like a bug as he described it), and was hoping maybe that was the answer to this game of charades.
Karl shook his head up and down, tears finally spilling out of his tired eyes.
“Oh, baby, come here.” Q gently led them over to the bed, before positioning Karl into his arms, and signaling Sap to do the same.
After Karl had been safely sandwiched between them, he had reached his hands up to cover his ears.
Sapnap took the hint and shut off the blaring music, opting for the humming silence of the room.
Karl sobbed loudly, curling more in on himself. Q tightened his arms around him, squeezing him gently. At that action, Karl almost immediately calmed down, his body loosening and his cries quieting themselves (Q compared it to when you give a baby a pacifier, it was that instantaneous).
Sap and Q looked at each other incredulously, before deciding to close in on Karl again.
His breathing evened out, and the boys took their opportunity to investigate.
“Karl, babe? Are you alright?” Q asked carefully, brushing a hand over his face.
Karl gently shook his head no, squeezing his eyes closed. Looking at everything was too much, the colors felt like lasers burning into him.
“Can you talk, baby boy?” He shook his head lightly, he felt like if he had to hear his own voice, he would explode.
“Can you try?” Sap piped up, only to receive a smack from Quackity and a glare.
“I… I… loud, hurt.” Karl whimpered, his hands coming up to cover his ears once again.
Quackity gently removed one, and whispered “Hey, it’s alright. Are you overwhelmed right now? Is this a meltdown like the ones you were telling us about?” Karl frantically shook his head up and down at that, tears dripping out again. Sap made a small o-shape with his mouth, locking eyes with Quackity in mutual surprise.
“That’s okay, sweetheart. We can stay like this as long as you need, okay?” Sapnap mumbled affectionately, curling around the whimpering brunette once again.
Quackity leaned down and gave Karl small kisses on his face, brushing his fingers through his hair gently.
After just a few minutes of this, the tall boy’s breathing had evened out, and his body was relaxed and still. No more fidgeting or scratching or shaking. He had finally calmed down, and unfurled himself from his ball, reaching out to hold his boys closer.