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“Well, hot damn.” Doc’s exclamation, although spoken and not shouted, carries easily over the quiet metallic sounds of the group searching abandoned cars. 10K perks up at the sound of it, hoping the oldest member of their group has somehow found some water or gasoline left behind by previous scavengers, but he doesn’t stop rummaging through the glove compartment of a rusted sedan. You never know in the apocalypse, someone might have hidden painkillers or bullets among old bills and vehicle registration forms.
“Hey, kid, you’re gonna love this!” Doc calls across the vehicular graveyard, and 10K closes the glovebox with an internal sigh at the lack of anything more useful than paper within it.
He jogs over to Doc, rifle bouncing comfortingly against his shoulder blade, and mind supplying brief thoughts of what Doc could have found. Perhaps some ammo, but that would interest Warren and Mack as well. Maybe a new sniper rifle, 10K is by far the best shot of any of them, and he had confided in Doc the other night that he misses his old gun, incinerated along with the lab in Fort Collins. But who would have left a gun lying around? Even if they’d run out of bullets for it, rifles are good to threaten people with, so long as you’re good at bluffing.
Thoughts of a new weapon are enticing, but 10K knows better than to actually hope for anything, so he simply indulges in curiosity as Doc waves him over. 10K’s brow furrows in confusion when he sees what’s in Doc’s hands, not anything even remotely useful. It seems to be a magazine, and 10K can’t think of a single scenario in which they could need that. No matter what’s written in it, everyone who was once involved in it is probably a zombie now. But there’s a huge grin on Doc’s face, and 10K knows he must be missing some significance in the printed paper. It’s not that unusual for him to miss out on the others’ jokes, they seem to have had so many experiences before the apocalypse that he never did.
“You know how you’d said you’d never seen porn before?” Doc snickers at something amusing only to him, and 10K shrugs.
“Sure, guess I was too young for it when everything happened.” Everyone uses vague terms to refer to those first dark days, it’s easier to avoid calling up the pain that way. Somewhere nearby, 10K hears Addy’s voice repeating the word “porn” as a question, probably talking to Mack.
“Well, you’re in luck, kid. This may be the last non zombie Playboy in existence.” Doc shows the cover of the magazine to him, and 10K still fails to see what the big deal is, but he shrugs again and adjusts his rifle on his shoulder, going to stand next to Doc as he places the Playboy on the hood of a car and flips through it.
“So, what’s the big deal about-” 10K’s question dies in his throat with a gulp as he looks down at the glossy page Doc had flipped to, featuring a woman in nothing but bunny ears smiling at the camera.
10K had seen naked women before, Zs who had lost their clothes along with their flesh, occasional glimpses of a survivor bathing before he hid himself - and his very valuable weapon - away from them. He knows, roughly, what female anatomy is like, but he’d never really considered it beyond a vague interest that was always quickly replaced with the need to survive. Besides, no one was ever naked longer than they needed to be, these days.
But the woman in the magazine was clearly without clothes for the sole purpose of seeing her nude, not in the process of changing outfits or cleaning herself, or even being decontaminated like 10K’s most recent memory of nudity. Everything about her seems soft, pale skin devoid of scars or dirt, hair falling over her shoulders a bright blonde. She’s gorgeous, but almost seems inhuman in her cleanliness. There isn’t even any hair on her legs, or anywhere but her head.
Doc throws an arm around his shoulder and sighs, flipping the page to another girl without clothes, this one a redhead, but still pale and disturbingly clean, “They don’t make ‘em like this anymore, kiddo. Feast your eyes while you can.”
“They’re all so... clean,” is the only comment 10K can really come up with, having no frame of reference for anything else about the women in the magazine, and that sets Doc off laughing again.
“Oh god, of course that’s what you would notice. They certainly are clean, cleaner than anybody you’re ever gonna meet.”
10K finds himself remarkably okay with that concept. Although they’re beautiful, he finds himself wondering if any of the girls pictured are still alive today, or if their appearance of softness ended up causing them to stumble around, searching for brains with bunny ears on their heads.
Doc’s voice is fond as he looks at the magazine, “Man, you missed out on a whole lotta good shit by being born too close to the apocalypse.”
“Doc, you’re not trying to corrupt 10K over there, are you?” Addy’s voice carries over the wreckage of cars, amused at whatever bits of their conversation she’s heard. 10K smiles to himself and studies the woman on the next page, a brunette posing on a set of stairs. Maybe the girls aren’t all dead. Sure, they’re skinny, but who isn’t after Black Summer. Maybe these women had enough sense to pick up both a gun and the muscles needed to break a skull.
“I’m offended you would even ask that!” Doc calls back, before dropping his voice to talk to 10K, “It ain’t like porn’s gonna be any worse for you than the apocalypse.”
10K smiles at Doc, never as quick with the replies as the rest of the group, but that seems to be enough for Doc to smile back and flip to the next page. There are articles next to the pictures of the women, breaking them up, but Doc doesn’t seem to pay attention to them, and 10K can’t read that quickly. It’s not like he’s illiterate or anything, but like with talking to the group, it’s just hard considering he was on his own for so long.
There’s another picture of the brunette, and 10K studies her muscles more than anything, trying to see if she might have survived. She seems a little less sweet than the blonde had, and perhaps that’s just in her pose, but if any of them are still human he’d bet it’s her. She has well developed muscles on her legs, and that’s a point in her favour. Running is half of life these days. She might be able to pike a Z, with adrenaline in her system, but that wouldn’t keep her alive for long.
“So, what do you think, kid? Beyond ‘they’re clean’” Doc steps away from 10K a little, dropping his arm to lean against the cab of the car.
“She’d be fine with a handgun, I think.” Doc stares at 10K blankly in response, and 10K forgets that Doc couldn’t possibly have followed his train of thought, so he elaborates, gesturing to the picture, “She doesn’t have the forearm muscles to stabilize a sniper rifle without help, or the biceps to use a club. But she’s got strong enough legs to run if things go south, so a pistol is perfect for her.”
There’s another moment where nothing seems to connect in Doc’s mind, and then he doubles over laughing. 10K doesn’t get the joke, and he looks back at the picture, reassessing the woman and coming to the same conclusion. Okay, maybe one could argue for a rifle, something lighter than a proper sniper, but she’d stills struggle with it for a while before she would be able to be truly effective with it. You can’t always rely on there being a convenient wall to rest the gun on, sometimes you need to use your own strength to hold in steady.
“Oh god, kid, you’re killing me,” Doc wheezes, still laughing, before turning towards the rough direction Addy’s voice had come from, “You ain’t got nothing to worry about, Addy, the kid’s uncorruptable!”
There’s a vague sound of voices from the other side of the pile of cars, and then Addy and Mack appear, together as always. Addy smiles and raises an eyebrow at Doc, who’s still chuckling as he straightens up. He shakes his head and wipes tears of laughter from his eyes, gesturing at 10K, and Addy turns the questioning look on him.
“All I did was point out that the best weapon for her would be a handgun,” 10K shrugs and gestures at the magazine, and Addy walks over to inspect it, smacking Doc’s arm as soon as she sees the woman pictured in it.
“Oh God, Doc, you shouldn’t be showing him stuff like that,” She shakes her head, but she’s still smiling as she rolls her eyes at the picture. Mack peeks over her shoulder and hums in appreciation, before she smacks him too. “Don’t you be getting any ideas.”
“Hey, the kid had said he’d never seen porn before, who am I to deny him the experience when opportunity presents itself!” Doc holds up his hands in mock surrender, and Addy looks unimpressed by his protest. “Not like it did any good, he’s just pairing up the women with what gun they’d be most suited for.”
At that, Addy turns to 10K, and he’s worried he’s going to get hit for some unknown reason, but she simply says, “So, handgun, huh? Why not a Z Whacker?”
10K feels relief at having avoided her wrath, even though she doesn’t seem genuinely upset and didn’t hit Doc or Mack very hard at all. He really doesn’t understand these people, most of the time, but he wouldn’t go back to being alone for any reason. He points down at the woman in the picture, tapping on her upper arms.
“Doesn’t have the muscle for it, no way she could swing hard enough and fast enough to take on more than a couple of Zs.”
Doc and Mack exchange amused glances, and Addy nods with an almost surprised sounding “Huh!”
Addy flips back a few pages, landing on the blonde and tapping on the paper, “What about her?”
10K studies the woman for a little bit, brow creasing slightly in concentration. She doesn’t seem to have as developed leg muscles, but her forearms seem to have more definition. Nothing close quarters for her, but if she played her cards right she could definitely still be alive.
“He’s seriously thinking about this,” Mack sounds astonished, and Doc shakes his head in response.
“I told you, kid can’t be corrupted,” Doc sounds more amused than anything, and Addy throws both of them a glare.
“He’s smarter than the both of you, this is far more useful than what you’d do with it.”
Doc snickers, and Mack smiles with a small shrug, saying, “You’re not wrong, babe.” He presses a kiss to her cheek and walks over to lean next to Doc, starting up a conversation about ‘the good old days’.
“Well?” Addy prompts 10K, shaking her head at the other guys with a fond smile.
“Sniper rifle.” 10K taps the appropriate areas of the picture as he explains his reasoning, which causes Doc and Mack to laugh again, but Addy nods with his words, “She doesn’t have the legs to run, so she’d have to be smart. Hide out on a rooftop somewhere, but she could probably handle holding it steady, she’s got the muscles here for it.”
10K glances up briefly at the sound of more feet, seeing Warren approaching them with her best unimpressed look on her face. Addy doesn’t notice the sound of her walking, or doesn’t care, and continues flipping through the magazine.
“You think any of them are still alive?” She eventually asks, not even looking up from the page she’s on.
Warren answers before any of them can, “I don’t know about whatever you’re looking at, but I see four layabouts who won’t be alive much longer if they don’t get back to work.”
Addy finally turns around at that, as Warren levels what might have been a threatening glare at all of them, effect ruined by the slight smile at the edges of her lips.
They break up their impromptu magazine study with laughter and feigned protest, turning back to rummaging through the wrecked cars for a while longer. Doc continues to tease 10K about pairing the girls with weapons the whole time, and 10K takes it in good humour. There’s definitely nothing that could prompt him to leave this group. In many ways, they’re more of a family than he’s ever had, and it keeps a smile on his face until late that night.