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“I’m sorry… you want to what?”
Kunikida, incredulous, wishes his teacup was full of something stronger. Chuuya and Dazai sit across from him on the couch, Dazai with his usual calm smile, Chuuya with an aggravated grimace. The ginger sighs and tips his head back.
“We said we wanted you to move in,” Chuuya growls.
“More importantly,” Dazai continues. “We want you to date us.”
“Us.” Kunikida echoes the word. “Both of you. At the same time.”
“We’d both be dating you, too, Kunikida-kun.”
Dazai’s comment makes him want to consult his notebook so he can review his ideals about relationships. Aside from the timing being too early—he’s getting married at twenty-seven—he’s relatively sure nothing on his list mentions anything about dating two men simultaneously. Or even one, for that matter.
“And,” Chuuya continues, setting his elbows on his knees, “We’d be doing it all openly, just the three of us. Fewer risk of diseases that way.” He passes a glare at Dazai.
“Chuuya’s no fun,” he grumbles.
“Crabs is a shitty fucking way to die, asshole!”
“But Chuuya—”
Kunikida zones out of their banter and tries to figure out how exactly he got into this situation. He supposes it started by accepting Dazai’s invitation to an upscale apartment, where he has apparently, unbeknownst to everyone but Fukuzawa, been cohabitating with Port Mafia executive and ex-partner Nakahara Chuuya. Unwarned of the mafioso’s presence, Kunikida swiftly draws a gun to defend himself upon spotting him. In return, Chuuya simply tells him that isn’t necessary with more calm than Kunikida thought he was capable of and offers him tea. He accepts, only because it would be impolite to refuse hospitality, but he makes sure he watches Chuuya prepare it just in case there were any secret ingredients.
The conversation starts out unusually: Dazai and Chuuya say they’ve re-established their partnership and have been dating for almost six months now, but they both agree something is missing. Then, out of nowhere, as Chuuya reaches for the brunet’s hand, Dazai announces, “We decided that something is you.”
Kunikida’s head is still spinning from that declaration, and as the conversation continues, it gets… stranger. He finds himself at the receiving end of not one but two declarations of feelings, neither of which he expects, and neither of which he can respond to before Chuuya springs wanting him to move in on him.
He has no idea how to respond to any of it, but as the bickering continues, he admits to himself he can see the merits of such an arrangement. Dazai isn’t bad looking by any means, even though he is intolerable. And Chuuya, albeit a criminal, is attractive. Of his fifty-eight qualities for an ideal wife, neither Dazai nor Chuuya fulfill the whole list.
But perhaps together…
“Stupid fucking mackerel!”
“Aww… did the hat rack with shitty taste in shoes get mad?”
Kunikida, folding his arms, states, “Will you two knock it off for a minute? I’m trying to think.” Before long, he catches Chuuya and Dazai whispering to each other.
“He’s thinking about it?” Chuuya asks.
“I told you he would, Chuuya. Kunikida-kun seems straightlaced, but he dislikes authority figures.”
“What the fuck does that have to do with him dating us, beanpole?”
“Chuuya-kun is a little stupid. Is it because he thinks Kunikida-kun is so good-looking?”
Chuuya clicks his tongue and rolls his r’s in his usual delinquent way as he sputters back something about Dazai thinking the same.
“You may have shitty taste in shoes, but at least you have good taste in men, as evidenced by you dating me and wanting to date him.”
“Dazai, I swear to fuck—”
“How?” Kunikida breaks in.
Instantly, Dazai and Chuuya turn to him.
“How… does something like this work? Or, maybe more clearly, where do I fit into it?”
“If you agree to this,” Chuuya begins, “You wouldn't be a third wheel, and it sure as fuck wouldn’t be short-term.”
“Unless you’re into that sort of thing,” Dazai adds. “Or unless you decide you hate it, in which case it would be unfair of us to keep you in whatever arrangement we come up with.”
Kunikida has no idea how he could be considered an “equal” in a partnership that goes back to age fifteen, especially when his own partnership with Dazai has been far shorter in comparison and strictly professional up to this point. And that’s ignoring the fact, even if one look tells him Chuuya is attractive, that he hardly knows the mafioso at all aside from a name and a string of alleged crimes.
“Maybe things will look different between the three of us,” Chuuya continues. “Like, in terms of attention, you know? But the feelings will all be equal.”
Dazai nods. “Chuuya and I will still do this or that together, but we’ll also both do things alone with you. The things we do separately, we’ll do transparently, so there’s no need to get jealous or fret about whatever differences emerge.”
Next to Dazai, Chuuya nods in agreement.
“Of course, we’ll all do things together, too,” Dazai reassures him.
He’s sorely tempted to try this arrangement out, but if anyone asked him, he’s not sure he could explain why. So, he murmurs, “Say that after some thought, I agree to this. What happens next?”
“A trial run, probably,” Dazai states. “You could come over for dinner. We’d treat it like a date night. Cook together, watch one of those stupid mafia movies Chuuya likes…”
“Hey, you like them, too!”
“I like your running commentary about how nothing in them works.”
“That’s your fucking job!” Chuuya snaps. Then, he clears his throat. “Bottom line: we don’t expect to hash everything out tonight. That shit takes time in any relationship. But, to make sure this goes as smoothly as possible, if it’s something you want to even try…”
Out of nowhere, Chuuya looks shy.
“You know… we… should be clear about some things up front.”
“Like boundaries?” Kunikida asks.
“Of course.” Dazai claps his hands together. “Chuuya and I annoy each other, but even we have our limits.”
“That’s… shockingly mature, actually.” Kunikida scratches his chin. “Hmm… and I would have a say in those limits.”
“Not between the two of us,” Dazai says. “You’d be able to set your own limits with one or both of us.”
“They’re more ground rules,” Chuuya explains. “To keep the order and peace.”
“And if I eventually decide against it?”
“Like we said.” Chuuya tips his hat back. “I don’t think either of us would fucking make you stay.”
Kunikida takes another sip of his tea and swivels around the lavish apartment. Can I even live somewhere like this? he wonders. Money hasn’t even crossed his mind yet. He’s tempted to ask about it, but he doesn’t want to bring up something so serious so soon.
In the end, he does the only thing he can think of: he asks to consider it. And when he comes back a few nights later, he brings a list of questions, money among them, but he’ll work his way up to that. He gathers, from that follow-up meeting, that this really is a decision Dazai and Chuuya made together. “Why me, then?” he asks.
Dazai and Chuuya exchange looks. “Because we both fucking like you,” Chuuya announces. “Romantically.”
“Kunikida-kun is stunning when he’s mad,” Dazai sighs, folding his hands.
“And I think your commitment to your ideals is sexy.”
Kunikida makes a mental note to cross off “Be openly flirted with by a member of an enemy organization” off of his “Extremely unlikely but not impossible calamities” list. Not that he thinks it’s a calamity. Come to think of it, Chuuya’s words make his stomach flutter.
He continues working his way down the list. When he reaches rent, Chuuya announces, “Since I have the highest salary of the three of us, I’d cover it. Dazai pays for the internet and utilities. We split groceries. You could chip in with those things. Or buy me a nice bottle of wine every now and then.”
He can tell by Chuuya’s grin that he’s still flirting. He expects Dazai to be childish or jealous about it. But the brunet doesn’t react at all, almost as if he’s immune to any prospects of envy in that department.
Or, conversely, he knows Chuuya is the flirty type and expects this but is unsure of how Kunikida will react.
With a few more questions, Kunikida reaches the bottom of his list and moves on to his boundaries, both non-negotiable and slightly flexible. “I want to take this slow,” he begins. “I’ve never dated one man, let alone two at the same time. To that end, I’m not moving in right away, but I’m happy to after a certain period if I find this arrangement works as well for me as it does for the two of you. If I do agree to it, I can’t see myself wanting to sleep in the same bed as both of you right away since I tend to run hot at night, but that’s something we can negotiate. More importantly…” His voice trails off. “If I agree to this, we need to evenly divide the housekeeping. The three of us all have difficult jobs, and I find myself happier when I maintain an orderly living space.”
“Of course,” Chuuya says, patting Dazai’s thigh. “The mackerel fucking hates cleaning, but I’m sure he’ll pull his weight. Right?”
Dazai, after a momentary pout, sighs and murmurs, “Can we negotiate that point just a little?”
“Dazai—”
“Chuuya can’t really do much after he uses Corruption, so if that happens, I’ll cover him.”
Kunikida blinks. That’s not really what he expected.
“Well, the beanpole has depressive episodes, so if he can’t get out of fucking bed, I’ll cover him.”
Kunikida considers Chuuya’s words for a moment. “In honesty, it’s nice to see you’re willing to support each other, but that seems like an unnecessarily heavy burden for just the two of you to shoulder. In other words, it sounds unequal and imbalanced.” After a moment of consideration, he adds, “So instead, if we get to that point, how about we all agree to cover each other if we’re in a place to?” He watches Chuuya and Dazai glance at each other.
“Is that good with you, Dazai?”
“Yeah. You?”
Chuuya nods and sends Kunikida a smirk. “Maybe I’m being overly optimistic,” he states, rising, “but I think this is going to work out better than any of us expect.”
On their first date night a week later, Chuuya makes bolognese, Kunikida and Dazai collaborate to make a salad, and Kunikida brings dessert. He can’t shake that distinct feeling of being out of place. Dazai must pick up on that because he says, “Kunikida-kun you don’t have to wonder where you fit in with us.” Dazai pats his arm lightly and smiles. “We both like you. We have for a while.”
“Which one of you liked me first?”
“Dazai,” Chuuya says.
“I didn’t say anything at first” Dazai adds, twirling his fork in his pasta. “But it was killing me. I felt like I was being unfaithful to Chuuya.”
Chuuya swallows his bite and sips his wine. “Around the time he told me was when I saw you for the first time. You and Dazai were on a mission. I didn’t even suspect he had feelings for you, but I thought you were pretty.”
Pretty? Kunikida thinks. He knows that word should probably bother him, especially coming out of Chuuya’s mouth, but it doesn’t.
“Your voice was nice. You seemed interesting. I found myself crushing on you.”
“We told each other on the same night,” Dazai continues. “After that, we talked a lot about what to do. Of course, we decided not to break up and talk to you about it instead.”
Kunikida reaches for his own wine. “I… have to say, I’m still really unsure what to think of all this, but I am glad I’m not an unintentional home wrecker.”
Chuuya snickers and passes him a long look. Dazai pats his arm again. They wind up on Chuuya’s sofa after dinner with one of the stupid mafia movies Chuuya enjoys. Kunikida jerks awake to the ending credits with Chuuya tucked under one arm and Dazai curled up with his head in his lap.
“Just let him sleep, Kunikida,” Chuuya murmurs. “I get the impression he had a long day.”
Kunikida knows it’s not appropriate to talk about work, at least not in specific terms, so he begrudgingly says, “We had a case that almost went wrong.”
“Yeah,” Chuuya murmurs, starting to back away.
“You… don’t have to get up if you’re comfortable.”
Immediately, Chuuya glues himself to Kunikida’s side again, running a gloved hand through a sleeping Dazai’s hair and smiling.
Oh. Kunikida swallows. He’s… pretty when he smiles.
“When he left the Port Mafia, I thought he was dead. I was fucking pissed when he showed up out of the blue, but I soon found my fucking feelings were just as alive.”
Kunikida plucks Chuuya’s hat off, and tosses it on the table. He threads his arm back around Chuuya again, letting his eyes sink shut again. “I thought things between us were as good as they were going to get. But then, I saw you. I felt like a real dick for wanting more. When he said he felt the same way, I nearly fucking lost it.”
Kunikida, without meaning to, smooths Chuuya’s back. He intends it as a gesture of comfort. Realizing he’s doing it, his eyes snap open and he starts to apologize.
Chuuya sets one finger against his lips, then raises the same finger to his, a gesture to stay quiet.
“Dazai’s a light sleeper,” he explains. “Call it his old executive instincts…”
Kunikida nods and lets out his apologies as a sigh.
“Shit like this doesn’t bother me. I like cuddling. I like being touched.” Chuuya smiles. “I like kissing.”
“You want to,” Kunikida observes.
“But I won’t. Because you said you wanted to take things slow, and I fucking respect that.”
In his lap, Dazai stirs and smiles in his sleep, then falls still again. His fingers flex beside Kunikida’s thigh.
“Is it okay if I stay like this, though?”
“Yeah,” Kunikida answers. “It’s… nice.”
A few date nights later, Dazai and Chuuya kiss him for the first time. He and Dazai go on a date alone while Chuuya cooks, which he offers to do since Kunikida did the same for him and Dazai a week ago. “Don’t tell me Dazai is going to cook so we can go out,” Kunikida jokes before leaving.
“Trust me, he fucking won’t,” Chuuya answers as he ties his apron strings. “He’ll probably order us pizza. Which is a much safer bet. The last thing I need is Dazai committing arson in my kitchen.”
“But Chuuya, fire is so fu—”
Chuuya cust Dazai off with a kiss, then hugs Kunikida and announces, “Have a good time, but don’t spoil your appetite.”
Dazai drags him to three bookstores. They buy Chuuya flowers on the way back. Kunikida also picks up a roll cake. He’s beginning to reach a point where he thinks they really are all equal.
He also recognizes his own desire to feel Chuuya’s lips against his. Or Dazai’s. Or both. And that, perhaps, is the most confusing thing of all.
Back at the apartment, Chuuya receives the flowers with a smile, and they set the table together. Chuuya thanks them both for thinking of him. and they spend dinner the way they normally do: chatting about this or that and enjoying Chuuya’s incredible cooking.
It happens when they’re done eating. As Dazai starts to clear the table, he calls Kunikida’s name. “Doppo.” It’s rare to hear it in any context, so he turns instinctively.
And just like that, Dazai’s lips brush against his.
He doesn’t react at first other than blinking. But slowly, as his mind catches up with the natural flow of time, he lifts a hand to Dazai’s jawline and skims it with his thumb, answering Dazai’s kiss with one of his own. He sighs as Dazai draws back, watches the brown eyes flutter open, gleaming not with mischief but with some domestic contentment.
“Mackerel,” Chuuya calls. “Pull your fucking weight.”
“Chuuya’s so bossy,” Dazai retorts, but he rises and complies.
It doesn’t seem to bother Chuuya that Dazai just kissed him, even if he did stop to watch.
He thinks he’s out of the woods, but later, Chuuya whispers in his ear, “Do I get a turn, too?” in a low tone that makes him shudder.
Dazai must feel it because he snickers. “Chuuya’s not good at many things, but he’s incredible at kissing.”
Kunikida swallows as he imagines it.
Dazai’s fingers walk along his arm, a silent tease that accompanies his verbal one. “If you want him to, you should accept, Kunikida-kun.”
“I…” He bites his lip.
“Hey, Kunikida,” Chuuya calls. “I was serious about wanting to kiss you, but really, I’d rather you say no than push yourself too far.”
In the end, Kunikida agrees. “But… if I’m no good… or if kissing Dazai is better—”
Chuuya throws back his head with a laugh. “You think he’s getting there, Dazai?”
“Getting there,” Dazai agrees. “But Kunikida-kun is still a little insecure.”
“We should fix that.”
He’d panic if Chuuya didn’t kiss him. It starts as an innocent peck, then evolves into something deep, a little rough, and mind numbingly delightful. Or maybe that’s the fact that Dazai is smoothing his chest, murmuring reassurances in his ear that he catches despite the filthy noises Chuuya’s mouth makes against his. “He likes it,” Dazai murmurs. “He wouldn’t still be kissing you if he didn’t.”
A little later, “That’s it, Kunikida-kun… you deserve to enjoy this.”
A moment before Dazai nibbles the shell of his ear and makes him moan, he whispers, “You’re so beautiful… Doppo… so important to me. To us…”
It’s nothing short of a miracle that they don’t all wind up in Chuuya’s bed that night. Dazai was right: Chuuya is amazing at kissing. But Dazai is also good, as he learns when Chuuya pulls back and Dazai leans in to pick up right where the ginger left off.
“Do you understand now?” Chuuya demands.
It’s a question he can’t answer since his mouth is occupied by Dazai’s tongue.
“We both have feelings for you, Kunikida. The same way we have feelings for each other.”
A pathetic whimper escapes him as he feels Chuuya’s lips against his neck.
“You’re not a third wheel. You’re not a tangential fucking part of this. You’re essential.”
The happiness doesn’t kill him, and even if it goes no farther than the three of them swapping kisses, which includes Dazai climbing into his lap and kissing Chuuya for just as long as both of them kissed him, that night solidifies his feelings and makes him more certain that this isn’t just a phase or a crush. It’s something more.
His first date with Chuuya is to a classy bar where he feels severely underdressed. While smooth jazz plays overhead, he and Chuuya drink good wine and sake until his head is spinning. Chuuya pays without batting an eye. They bring Dazai a bottle of whiskey. Dazai orders pizza.
“Dazai ain’t one for flowers,” Chuuya explains. “I like them. I think they’re romantic. But to Dazai, flowers are something for a grave.”
“He was happy enough to buy some for you.”
“Yeah,” Chuuya says, grinning. “Cause he knows I think it’s romantic.”
Kunikida nods. “I see… I think I understand.”
“After all that sake, I’m kind of surprised.”
Kunikida looks at the mafioso. “You didn’t get me drunk to take advantage of me somehow, did you?”
“Fuck, no. I kill and steal, but that shit’s where I draw a hard line.” Chuuya, grinning, slips his gloved fingers between Kunikida’s. “This okay with you, though?”
“Um…” Kunikida pauses. “Yeah. It’s… nice.”
“You’re so fucking cute,” Chuuya continues. “I like that you’ll make out with both of us but you still get shy about me holding your hand…”
“Is that something to like?”
“To me, yeah.” Chuuya, still grinning, tugs him forward. “Come on. There’s a nice bakery this way. I want to buy something for dessert.”
Dazai kisses them both at the door, him first, then Chuuya. “Sake and wine totally don’t go together,” he retorts.
“They don’t?”
Kunikida backs against the door as Chuuya tastes his mouth.
“I don’t think it’s that bad.”
“Because Chuuya has shitty taste. Now come on. I got seafood pizza, and I don’t want it to get cold.”
Dazai occupies the middle couch cushion tonight while they watch an episode of a drama Dazai has apparently been interested in. Chuuya winds up dozing off, head resting in Dazai’s lap.
“How was your date with Chuuya?”
“Good,” Kunikida replies. By now, he has recovered from his earlier tipsiness. “I’m sure he’d want me to tell you he exercised restraint at the bar.”
“He took you there?” Dazai asked. “In the middle of the day?”
“The atmosphere was nice.” He feels Dazai’s playing with his fingers. “What did you do while we were gone?”
“I finished that book I bought the last time we went out.”
“You read a lot.”
Dazai smiles and hums. “I don’t know if you’d like it, but I’d be happy to loan you a book if you’re interested. One about a math teacher.”
“Alright.”
Dazai leans up to kiss his cheek. Kunikida squeezes Dazai’s hand while Chuuya continues to snore in his lap.
When the day comes and Chuuya and Dazai go out again, he doesn’t feel left out. In fact, he takes the opportunity to woo them both with a home-cooked meal. He goes on a fishing trip in the morning. In the afternoon, when they reconvene at Chuuya’s apartment, he insists they let him do the cooking.
“Then,” Chuuya says, “We’ll go back out and grab something for dessert. Are you in the mood for anything?”
“Maybe something with chestnut since it’s the season.”
“I know just the thing,” Dazai states, and before Chuuya can object, Dazai drags him back out again. While they're gone, he grills the fish, cooks the rice, pickles some vegetables… he wonders if they even like this kind of thing. But when they come back with chestnut cream puffs from a bakery Dazai knows he likes, he lets go of all his insecurities. Dazai insists on being fed. Chuuya and Kunikida take turns. They split a cream puff for dessert, Dazai returning the favor.
“There’s some cream on your face,” Chuuya announces, tipping Kunikida’s chin, wiping the corner of his mouth with his thumb, and licking the residue away.
Kunikida flushes, and Dazai winds up in stitches.
“Sorry. You just reacted so unexpectedly.” Dazai pats his hand. “How’s that book I loaned you, by the way?”
“More interesting than I anticipated,” Kunikida explains. “I like the writing style, even if the plot can be predictable here and there.”
“What book is it?” Chuuya asks.
Dazai rattles off the title.
“No way. You actually loaned him the only decent fucking book you’ve read?”
“I take it you have feelings about it?”
“Mostly good,” Chuuya admits, hugging his midriff and looking up at him. “I’m curious to hear what you think about the ending.”
They wind up discussing it on one of their joint dates, of which there are many. Arcades, movies, parks and tourist attractions, restaurants plain and fancy… they walk all over Chinatown and eat fresh meat buns on a bench with Chuuya in the middle. Once or twice, when they have the time, they even take a few overnight trips to Tokyo, where Dazai sleeps with him the first night since Chuuya wants space, then Chuuya sleeps with him the second time since Dazai did last time.
The next time he goes to Chuuya’s house, he agrees to sleep with both of them, with advance apologies for backing out if he gets too warm. He sleeps on the outside but reaches across Dazai to rest a hand on Chuuya’s hip, his nose resting against Dazai’s temple.
He winds up sleeping in late, but Dazai of all people brings him and Chuuya breakfast in bed.
He feels like it’s something he could get used to, something he could look forward to every morning.
But, knowing it’s too soon, he winds up going home that evening after receiving a good-bye kiss from both Dazai and Chuuya. Their hands interlace as he leaves. He half rethinks it as the elevator descends. Stubborn as ever, Kunikida Doppo clings to his ideals, but he finds he sleeps far better when he’s clinging to Dazai and Chuuya.
He decides to bring it up the next time they get together at Chuuya’s place, but before that can happen, Dazai and Chuuya leave on a joint mission, and Kunikida finds himself sitting alone with his anxieties.
The worst of them do not transpire, but Dazai calls him to tell him he’s injured, Chuuya is recovering from Corruption, and they could both use a hand if he can cover them. So, mustering all of his energy after work, Kunikida goes to Chuuya’s apartment. The door is already unlocked. He brings pain killers, a bottle of red wine for when Chuuya fully recovers, plenty of food to cook… he doesn’t plan to stay. He just plans to do some basic meal prep and leave to give them both space.
One of Dazai’s eyes is bandaged. And his head. “It’s not as serious as it looks,” he reassures Kunikida.
But then, Kunikida sees Chuuya, borderline comatose, snoring away, skin patterned in fading marks and forming bruises.
“I did the best I could for both of us.”
Kunikida drops onto the edge of the bed.
“I’m sorry it wasn’t enough.”
It’s hard to see them in bad shape. Still, he kisses Dazai’s temple, then Chuuya’s forehead, and says, “I’m going to cook you two enough to last for a few days. Then, I’ll—”
“Don’t go.” Dazai looks up at him. “Chuuya asked me for one thing before he passed out. ‘If Kunikida comes, make sure he stays.’” He lowers his eyes to Chuuya and smooths his hair. “I can’t make you, but…”
“Are you just asking for him?”
Dazai, after a long moment of silence, murmurs, “No.”
Sighing, Kunikida rises. “Even if you were, I don’t think I can leave in good conscience when you’re injured.”
Dazai pinches his sleeve before he can walk away. “Doppo.”
Kunikida turns to him.
“I love you.”
His heart leaps into his throat. He wasn’t sure what he expected Dazai to say, but that wasn’t it. As he sits back down on the edge of the bed, he swallows and takes Dazai’s bandaged hand in his.
“You don’t need to say it back.”
“I know.” He squeezes Dazai’s hand and sighs. “I’m honored. And I’m worried. About whatever you and Nakahara went through, because it had to be bad enough to prompt this.” He glances up at Dazai. “It’s not that I doubt your words. It was just… sudden.”
“Sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize,” Kunikida answers. “I’m happy you were honest about your feelings, Dazai. One day, I’ll be in a place where I can say them directly. I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you to be patient, though.”
“Kunikida-kun, Chuuya is always telling you not to rush.”
Dazai pecks his cheek, then settles back in bed.
“I’m going to remind you to do the same since he can’t right now.”
“Alright, but in exchange, I want you to get some rest.”
Dazai shuts his eyes with a smile. “Of course. I know you’ll take good care of us.”
For the next couple of days, when he’s not at work, Kunikida alternates between cooking and checking in on them. He finishes the book Dazai loaned him. Chuuya wakes up and uses all of his strength on two words. “Thank you.” Then, he drifts off again. The bandage comes off of Dazai’s head to reveal a gash. Kunikida helps them both scrub themselves, trying not to think too much about how this is the first time he has seen their bodies. He kisses Chuuya’s bruises and Dazai’s scars, makes sure they both eat light but filling meals. He sleeps in the same room, sandwiching Chuuya between Dazai and himself. Slowly, their strength returns. Dazai shows up to work less tardy than usual with a smile, using his bangs to hide the wound.
When Ranpo points it out, Yosano offers to heal it. Dazai insists it’s fine, that if he’s going to almost die, he’d rather die the whole way.
Kunikida realizes at that moment he hasn’t told Fukuzawa he’s dating two men, one of whom happens to be a Port Mafia executive. Feeling the need to despite the settling dust following Dazai’s injury, he finds a good moment to enter Fukuzawa’s office.
Before he can even begin, Fukuzawa says, “If this is about Nakahara and Dazai, you don’t need to say anything. Dazai already explained everything.”
Kunikida opens his mouth.
“You don’t need to apologize,” Fukuzawa continues, flipping the form he has been writing on. “And if you need my blessing to move forward, you have it.”
After bowing, he returns to his desk and sinks into his chair, where he feels just as stunned as he did the night Dazai and Chuuya both approached him.
“Kunikida-kun?”
He glances up to Dazai, then murmurs, “Go home, Dazai. I’ll cover you.”
“But Kunikida-kun—”
“Nakahara is still recovering. I can handle the work.”
Dazai sits down and pats his shoulder. “How about you go home instead?”
When he arrives at Chuuya’s apartment that afternoon, Chuuya meets him at the door. He still looks tired, but the weary smile says all that needs to be said.
“Welcome back, Kunikida.”
He hugs Chuuya so tightly, he’s shocked the redhead doesn’t complain. In a shaky voice, he manages, “I’m… home.”
“Yeah,” Chuuya murmurs. “Yeah, you are.”
That’s how Dazai and Chuuya invite him to live with them. Not foolish enough to turn it down a second time, this time, he accepts. They all wind up tangled in Chuuya’s sheets together as part of the celebration. The next morning, while Dazai teases him about his glowing skin and Chuuya keeps snapping at him to stop, Dazai hugs him and murmurs, “It was good.”
“Fuck, yeah, it was,” Chuuya sighs, smoothing his still bare chest beneath the blankets.
“Is… this… also something we do separately and together? Like… dating?”
“You’re fucking adorable,” Chuuya says, grinning. “Yeah. If that’s something you’re interested in. I don’t really have feelings about it one way or the other.”
“Neither do I,” Dazai notes, smiling.
“We… can talk about it once I fully recover my dignity.”
“Dignity?” Chuuya echoes, then lets out a loud laugh. “So fucking us means you have no dignity?”
Kunikida covers his burning face with both hands.
“Kunikida-kun, you’re kind of shy the morning after. Correct me if I’m wrong, Chuuya, but he didn’t seem very shy last night.”
“Move your hands a little, Kunikida.”
The instant he complies, Chuuya kisses him.
“You’re fucking beautiful.” The words fall on his lips as a sigh. “Just in case you forgot I said it last night, I love you.”
“Mmm… so do I…” Dazai snuggles closer.
He lets himself stay sandwiched between them, processing the events and words. The more he thinks, the more flustered he feels.
“Does this mean you’re staying?” Chuuya asks.
Kunikida turns to him.
“You don’t have to… you know… sleep in this bed with me and Dazai every night, but… I think I speak for both of us when we say we want you here.”
“I…” He pauses, then stares at the ceiling. “I’m going to need coffee before I answer that question.”
“I’ll go get you some,” Chuuya offers.
He watches Chuuya walk across his bedroom completely naked, as if such a thing is normal.
Before he even takes the first sip of coffee, the answer is obvious. He’s leaving. For work. To get his things from the dorms. Then, he’s coming back and finding a place for his belongings among Dazai’s and Chuuya’s. Moving in means he sees more of them, that he’s part of a housekeeping system now rather than maintaining his own space. He adjusts to their rhythms, and they adjust to his.
Since then, there have been more injuries, a few depressive episodes on Dazai’s part, nights where Chuuya or Dazai say, “I need you to cover me.” Neither Dazai nor Chuuya complain when they’re the ones picking up the slack. But Kunikida has never had a reason to ask.
Until today.
He starts on the wrong foot. By the time he gets to the office, he has spilled coffee on himself and has no time to change. While he gets most of it in the bathroom, he winds up attracting his colleagues' stares. They all know by now he’s living with Chuuya and Dazai, that the three of them are together in the romantic sense. No one says anything besides Atsushi, who only congratulates him in his usual sincere way, and that was a week after he moved out of the dorms.
“I wasn’t aware Dazai and Chuuya were into throwing coffee,” Yosano comments.
Seething, Kunikida continues his work.
Halfway through the morning, he notices an egregious error in his paperwork and has to start over, which means he has to skip lunch.
By the end of the day, he is ready to strangle anyone who comes near his desk. Because Dazai is off, he has to handle a case with Atsushi and nearly winds up riddled with bullet holes. He doesn’t blame Atsushi. Instead, he blames himself for not being in the ideal shape. He stays late to finish the paperwork, texting Dazai and asking him to pass his reassurances along to Chuuya.
On the train, he has to stand. Someone steps on his foot. He’s shocked his glasses haven’t shattered. In payment for that small blessing, though, he has to climb the stairs because the elevator at the apartment complex is out of order. He slips his key into the door and trudges inside, removing his scuffed shoes, fighting back the urge to punch something.
“Welcome back.”
Chuuya says the words. Dazai stands beside him. They’re both studying him, their hair damp. Dazai’s smile slowly fades.
“Kunikida-kun—”
“I’m sorry.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Please… I need you two to cover me.” He feels guilty for asking, feels that old anxiety that he doesn’t fit into what Dazai and Chuuya already have… that’s likely his exhaustion talking. He let go of that fear long ago, but it rises fresh now that he doesn’t even have energy to reassure himself.
Fortunately, he doesn’t have to. He’s caught in both of their hugs. Chuuya tiptoes to kiss him. Dazai’s lips find his cheek.
“Of course we’ll cover you,” Chuuya announces, grinning. “Come on. Let’s get you out of those clothes first. Dazai and I left the bath water in the tub. We’ll take care of everything while you soak.”
“Yeah,” Dazai reassures him. “Chuuya-kun is a pro at getting stains out. Here. Let me help you, too.”
He accepts every bit of care they provide, right down to scrubbing his body down and leaving trails of kisses here or there. Once he’s clean, he sinks into the hot water, all of his stress slipping out. He only suffers one interruption from Dazai, who notifies him that he has brought fresh pajamas, so it’s more a necessity than an annoyance in his book. They’re still warm from the dryer when he puts them on, and when he creeps out, he finds Chuuya alone on the sofa with a book.
“Come have a seat,” he calls, rising. “I’m getting you tea. You can use the blanket if you want.”
Kunikida helps himself to it. It’s one he brought when he moved in, and in addition to being soft, it now smells like all three of them.
Chuuya returns carrying a mug of chamomile tea that Kunikida takes. “Mind if I join you?”
He lifts the blanket so Chuuya can slip back underneath it. Resting his feet on the coffee table, he opens his book again.
“How’s the tea?”
Kunikida takes a sip. “It’s good.”
“Dazai mentioned I should keep some on hand in case you ever had an off day,” Chuuya murmurs, turning the page. “I’m glad I listened to him. His ideas are shitty most of the time, but when it comes to you, he’s surprisingly genuine. He never tries to trick me. In fact, he always offers information.” Chuuya glances up at him. “Maybe it bothers you that I ask Dazai this stuff instead of you, but the truth is, I do it because I like to surprise my partners now and then. That includes you.”
Kunikida takes another sip of his tea. “Dazai—”
“Should be back any minute. He made a convenience store run to buy us dinner.”
“Shit.” Kunikida sets his tea down. “I totally forgot—”
“Hey, Kunikida.”
“I—” He pauses. His glasses fog out of nowhere. His eyes start to burn. “I’m deeply and profoundly sorry for my shortcomings. I really dropped the ball today, didn’t I?”
The sofa shuffles. Chuuya gently coaxes the tea out of his hands. Once he settles again, he calls, “Come here.”
Without a single ounce of reluctance, Kunikida accepts Chuuya’s invitation and sets his head down on Chuuya’s thighs. Between soft caresses, equally soft shushes and reassurances, and Chuuya’s continuous attentiveness to the tears leaking from his eyes, he finds he can’t even be ashamed of it. And that’s doubly true when he catches Dazai’s call of, “I’m back!”
To which Chuuya calls, “Welcome home! We’re in the living room and are in dire need of your assistance!”
The moment Dazai appears over him, the brunet litters his face with kisses that tickle given how light they are. He snickers as he sheds tears, Chuuya alternating between ruffling his hair and drying his tears. By the time they’re done, he has recovered enough to sit up and eat convenience store bento with them. They all trade bites. Kunikida receives one from Dazai, then one from Chuuya.
“I also bought us all dessert,” Dazai states. “Chestnut for you. It’s your favorite. Chuuya gets a mackerel cake—”
“A what?”
“I’m joking,” Dazai laughs.
Kunikida can’t help but smile.
“I got you tiramisu.”
“What did you get for yourself?” Chuuya asks.
“Melon bread with whipped cream.”
“I’m stealing yours,” Chuuya announces.
“Chuuya! So mean,” Dazai sing-songs, pouting.
Chuuya, after swallowing his bite, says, “That’s what you deserve for fucking joking about such a disgusting cake flavor.”
“It’s not the flavor. It’s the shape.”
“Then buy me a fucking taiyaki!”
“Chuuya-kun, those aren’t mackerel-shaped…”
Between bites, Kunikida announces, “If Nakahara is stealing it, I’m helping.”
“Kunikida-kun!” Dazai lifts a dramatic hand to his head. “The utter betrayal! I thought I was your partner!”
“You are.”
Dazai stops his dramatic flailing.
“So are you,” he says to Chuuya. “And I… really…” He catches Dazai leaning forward, an expectant glow on his face. Chuuya looks up at him, grinning. “I… just… thank you.”
Chuuya lets out a yell Kunikida isn’t sure of the meaning to. Behind that, he hears Dazai clicking his tongue. “So anticlimactic…”
“Were you expecting something else?”
“Fuck, yeah, we were!” Chuuya declares. “But you take your time, Kunikida.”
“We can wait,” Dazai adds.
“You mean I can wait. You have the patience of a coat rack.”
“What does that even mean, Chuuya?”
While they’re arguing, Kunikida eats his pickled plum. Finding courage in the pit, he murmurs, “I love you.”
Their voices die off in tandem.
“Both of you,” he adds. “Dazai, Nakahara… thank you. For covering for me. For… inviting me into this life.” He bows his head, then lifts it with a smile. “I don’t believe I can ever repay you both.”
“Did Dazai infect you with his stupidity?” Chuuya demands, grinning. “You don’t owe us for any of that.”
“Yeah,” Dazai insists. “You make us happy, too, and it’s enough for both of us that you’re happy, too.”
Kunikida smiles at his half-eaten bento. When it’s empty, he finishes off his tea before Dazai brings them dessert. It winds up being a chaotic flurry of forks, stolen bites, insults, and disruptive kisses that slowly shift to something more affectionate.
But even if this is far different than anything he imagined, he wouldn’t have it any other way.