Work Text:
“We all know he’s cheating.”
The words cut through the hall as Ballister moved past the crowd leaving their Tactics class. Unlike the masses, he travelled to his room alone, pushing away any doubtful thoughts. He’d just earned top marks on the last exam. He had no reason to be bogged down. What did it matter if Thoddeus thought he was a cheat? He couldn’t let someone like Todd get him down, someone who never had to lift a finger to be accepted into the Institute.
Ballister had worked for his place here, for his room. His academic advisor had praised him for taking such difficult courses his first year, but Ballister knew that if he were to stay, he had no options.
He had to be the best or go home.
A piercing ping! echoed through his cavernous room, startling him. His wall lit up with an ominous blue tint as he read the message displayed on the holo.
Ballister Blackheart - REQUEST: Report to the Director’s office.
Sometimes, he wanted to go home.
-
“I see you have been busy, earning the highest marks in all of your academic studies and physical training.”
The Director’s office had amazed Ballister the first time he stepped foot in the room of purity. But now, the sheen seemed to have lost its lustre after being called down to the office a countless number of times, all for various things, mostly having to do with his admission and progress at the Institute. While the director seemed to favour his progress, Ballister knew she wouldn’t hesitate to remove him from the Institute if he became too much of a problem.
“I’m doing my best, just as every knight-in-training here, Director,” Ballister said stiffly. While he had avoided coming here for any missteps or disciplinary consequences, he still felt the unsettling feeling of failure close.
“You’re even outperforming young sir Goldenloin, a prodigy whose performance has been expected to be nothing less than extraordinary.” The Director wasn’t looking at Ballister, rather, looking through various files, looking something between displeased and impressed.
Ballister knew where this was going. “If I may speak?”
“Go on.”
Ballister took a deep breath before trying to explain himself. “If you’ve heard from Todd, or any of the others that I have been cheating, it’s just gossip and rumour. I would never- I hold up to the high standard of the Institution and Knight's honour code just as much as any of them. I’ve pledged the same-"
The Director held up her hand and Ballister immediately closed his mouth. “I’m quite aware of the rumours. But, your teachers have insisted every achievement you have earned was through the effort you gave, and your effort alone. And I believe them. You’re a diligent student, Ballister, I’ll give you that.”
It took a moment for Ballister to realise he was holding his breath. “Thank you, Director.”
“However, your academic career here isn’t going unnoticed by the public either,” she continued. “As you know, the public has access to all of our trainee’s statistics. You’re the buzz everyone in the Kingdom is talking about. And, the Queen is certainly quite fond of you.”
Ballister was quite aware of this. He was aware the Queen had chosen him of all people to represent what could be, and the public was watching his every step.
“With this in mind and for what is best for the Institute, I would like you to consider that you are going to be a hero, soon. If the public is going to talk about you, we want your image to be as pristine as possible.”
The Director shut her holo down. The buzz of electricity ceased as the room went quiet, waiting for him to respond.
“Your name,” the Director explained, “is marketing. It is your image.”
“You want me to change my name?” The Institute had been creating an image since he’d arrived. From his sword to his hair, now his name.
“Don’t sound so offended, Ballister,” the Director said plainly. “Plenty of our students have at least tweaked their names. And if they haven’t, their ancestors did. What I am asking isn’t out of the ordinary for our recruits.”
“Right,” Ballister said with a click of the tongue. He did suppose all of the heroic names weren’t just coincidence.
“Objectively, your name is a little… harsh to the tongue, shall we say? Blackheart certainly doesn’t sound like a hero’s name, and that is what you want to be, is it not? A hero? You have everything but a black heart, Ballister.”
Ballister nodded.
“You are already at a disadvantage. This way, you can change what you are in control of. You can choose the narrative.”
“Of course.”
The Director still didn’t look pleased, so Ballister tried for a simple smile.
“Give it some thought,” she said. “The end of the year ceremony is close. Every First Year will recite the pledge once more, with their new armor, sword and shield, announcing their name. I want you to show the public who you are.”
Ballister waited until the doors behind him were opened by the private guard, escorting him back to the main hall.
He had three months to choose a new name. That couldn’t be too difficult.
-
Ballister’s armor was heavy. Of course that was to be expected. He didn’t even have the heaviest load. Ballister looked across the armory to see Goldenloin skillfully dressing in his fittingly gold armor.
The armor fitting had been quite the experience for Ballister. While most of his class had armor that had been passed down for hundreds of years, Ballister had to start from scratch. He had done several days worth of research to find the perfect design for him, choosing a dark stained steel to ultimately blend in with his environment. Something modern and ergonomic.
“What if we grow?” he had asked the armorer. There were a couple haughty laughs from across the room.
“What if we grow?” Thoddeus mocked. “ Dude… we’re going to be knights for the realm. It doesn’t matter. Duh .”
“Wow, great answer,” Ballister said with a sardonic smile. Sometimes, it took every ounce of self control to not yell at that man.
“At least I’m not asking dumb stupid questions like the idiot you are.”
“And at least I don’t have to go ask mummy to borrow the armor every time we have practise,” Ballister quipped.
“At least I have a mommy.”
Well, Ballister had backed himself into a corner, he’d at least admit that to himself.
“You don’t have to be so ignorant, Todd.” The voice silenced all the idle chatter, and Ballister thought that was almost worse. If they weren’t listening then, they were definitely listening now.
Ballister watched as Ambrosius Goldenloin emerged from the corner, fully suited. His ancestors, the great bloodline of Gloreth herself, had always had golden armor. Ambrosius seemed to have really taken that tradition and used it as his full public image. He was, quite literally, the golden boy.
It seemed as Ambrosius was going to say more, but thankfully the crowd refocused on the doors opening.
“Young Knights of the Realm,” the Director announced, striding in the hall.
Everyone scrambled to their places, some only half dressed.
“I hope you are finding that your armor fits well,” she said. “Your armor should feel like a piece of you, just as you find your sword to be. Feel how you move. Put your helmet on and see the world as a knight.”
Ballister listened to the clinking of metal as people adjusted their plating and slid on their helmets. He followed suit.
“Breathe,” the Director instructed. “Today is the day you start your path as a knight, here at the Institution. May Gloreth guide you to victory.”
There was a collective, “yes, Director,” that echoed through the locker. The Director smiled upon the knights as she observed each trainee’s new armor, stopping in front of Ballister.
“Dark armor,” she observed. “This is a bold choice, Ballister. Are you sure this is who you want to be?”
He nodded his head with confidence. “If I am to stand out, why not make it part of my brand, Director?”
The Director smiled. “Maybe Blackheart is fitting for your brand, then.”
Before he could say anything, the Director was already off. The new squire rushed in, addressing the young knights.
“You are instructed to wear your armor every day for training hours. Keep your armor clean and do not lose any plating. This is expensive stuff, people.”
There were a couple of chuckles, but Ballister couldn’t figure why the expense would be something to laugh about.
“If you do happen to lose anything, please fill out one of these blue sheets hanging over here. We will do our best to find replacements.”
“With a fee, of course,” one of his classmates mumbled.
“What was that?” the squire asked.
“Nothing, sir.”
“Right… oooookay. You are dismissed.”
While most of them had training next, choosing to keep their newly fitted armor on, a handful of them had evening classes, and Ballister being one of them did not want to roam the halls with 25 kilos of deadweight on him.
He shifted out of the plating, impressed and satisfied with how his design turned out as he observed the set in his locker, bright lights framing it perfectly. He hung his sword up next to it.
Maybe he would be a knight.
“That has to be one of the coolest designs the Institute has seen in years.”
The locker behind him shut with a loud clunk as Ambrosius admired Ballister’s displayed armor.
“I predict it’s going to be more of a nuisance than anything. I should have thought about the colour a little more. Midday is going to be the bane of my existence from now on.”
Ambrosius let out a chuckle. Something softer than he’d heard from his classmate before. Most of the time he was joking around with the others, his smile and laugh were even and joyous. But they never felt full.
Ambrosius was the youngest in their entire class and a legacy to follow. Because of that, Ballister figured he had much more “image maintenance” to uphold. He’d moulded everything about himself to fit the brave and chivalrous knight he was expected to be, tweaking everything down to his laugh.
Both of them were doomed by their lineage.
“Well, at least you aren’t blinding yourself before you swing. If I’m being honest, I think my ancestors liked gold a little too much.”
“Nah,” Ballister shrugged, closing up his locker. “Your family liked gold? I had no idea.”
“It’s heavy too, it’s impractical,” he complained. “Should have painted it gold rather than sticking bars onto it.”
“You could always trade it in,” Ballister joked.
“Might have to if you keep kicking my butt in training.” The joke landed flatly and Ballister didn’t know how to respond. “Relax, I’m joking. You want to get lunch with me?”
Maybe Ballister really would be a knight someday. And maybe other people would accept it.
-
“Nachos? Bro, you’re going to have a stomach ache after practise, all that cheese churning in your stomach.”
“They are delicious, Ballister,” said Ambrosius, taking another large mouthful of the plate he’d loaded up. “Better than those stupid four good group plans or whatever the Institute is insisting we eat these days.”
Ballister looked down at his own plate, which was arguably the most unappetizing looking meal the Institute could probably come up with, most of it being puréed and blended together with a small cut of bread on the side.
“You’re not even- there’s no olives on it,” Ballister observed.
Ambrosius scrunched up his face.
“C’mon, olives are the best.”
“I’m allergic,” said Ambrosius, still wriggling his nose.
“Oh, okay, well I guess that is a legitimate issue.”
“I’m serious!”
Ballister laughed, dipping his bread in whatever mush he’d idly put on his tray. He was honestly starting to regret it. Ambrosius’ nachos smelled way better than this. “Whatever, Golden Boy.”
Ballister realised he had misspoke. He watched Ambrosius retract slightly, taking another bite.
“Sorry,” Ballister apologised. “I didn’t mean to-”
“No, no,” Ambrosius reassured. “It’s fine. I know you didn’t mean it against me.”
“Doesn’t mean I should have said anything,” Ballister said.
There was silence between them until both of them had finished their plates.
“I don’t mean to pry, but has your family name always been ‘Goldenloin’?”
“Well, as far as I’m aware, yes.”
“Oh.”
“Are you.. disappointed?”
“Not at all. Just curious. The Director wanted me to change my name for… marketing reasons or whatever. I thought maybe if you knew anything about it. Maybe there was a book of names or something that Knights took.”
“She wants you to change your name? What’s wrong with Ballister?”
“She’s more worried about my surname, I think. She said lots of recruits change their name to be more… heroic sounding? I don’t know. She might be right. Maybe if I had a name like, I don’t know, Swordwielder or whatever, people would get a better first impression of me.” Why exactly was he still talking?
Ambrosius seemed to be giving this a good think, so Ballister stood up, taking Ambrosius’ empty plate as well to the dirty tray rack, returning with, “it’s not that important.”
“I just don’t know why she would insinuate there’s anything wrong with your name at all.”
This man had to be pulling his leg. “You do know my surname is quite literally black heart. Blackheart. You know. Like a heart that is black, cold and dark. Hardly a hero’s name.”
“Maybe not every hero needs to be alike. Also thanks for getting my tray.” Ambrosius stood too, slinging his bag over his shoulder, surely heavy with books. Ambrosius was destined to be great . But he worked just as hard, if not harder than everyone else at the Institute for it. It was admirable. “See you at training, tonight.”
Ballister nodded, stopping Ambrosius from leaving quite so seen. “See you at training. And thanks.”
“For what?”
-
Ballister was sat at the back of the library, drowning in text.
“I sure hope there aren’t any exams I’ve forgotten about.”
The voice startled Ballister. He stood up abruptly, whipping around, despite the friendly voice.
Ambrosius.
“Didn’t mean to startle you.”
“Didn’t startle me,” Ballister said with a lie, relaxing a little. “And no, I’m not studying for an exam.”
“Just, in the library for some light reading then?” Ambrosius pointed to the stack of books curved around the current book he had open. He had practically made his own book cave.
“Believe it or not, I’m still looking for a name,” said Ballister, returning to the words in front of him.
“You’ve got a name. Ballister Blackheart, Hero of the Realm!”
“Braveheart, Brightheart, Broadheart,” Ballister listed. “Quite literally anything but Blackheart. Or maybe I just need to scrap it all and start a-new. ‘Galahad’ was quite popular at one point. It’s got no right to it, though, ‘Ballister Galahad’.”
“Well-”
“Taken too. I don’t want to be a carbon copy of someone else.”
“Of course not-”
“And I read something in the archives of another knight who had the same name as someone else, and it was terribly confusing- of course this was a children’s tale, but I don’t want to be the living tale of those men-”
“R-”
“But I did indeed find a list of every living Knight. I was just stupid enough to not look through the encyclopaedia of the History of Knights. It’s all in the index! You know, there were loads of knights with a surname starting with the letter B, and many knights have alliterating names-”
“You do realise it’s half past one.”
“Of course.”
“In the morning, I might add.”
“Ah, yes. I may have lost track of time.” Ballister had received another message from the Director, asking if he had chosen a name. She wanted to approve it before the ceremony, which left approximately three weeks. Plus, finals were looming in those coming weeks, so he had to get his research done now, rather than later. “I can’t stop now, Ambrosius. I’m on a roll.”
Ballister braced himself for a long speech about how this whole thing was ridiculous.
“Do you want help?”
Ballister blinked.
“I mean, I don’t want to interfere with your train of thought.”
“No, not at all,” Ballister said. He watched as Ambrosius picked up a chair, scooting close.
“So, what have you been reading?” Ambrosius asked. “Do you have a favorite tale we can take inspiration from?”
“Oh, right- erm-” Ballister was suddenly overcome with self-consciousness. If he claimed his favorite reading was The Joyous Knight , a soppy romance tragedy (which was modernised, he might add) in which the knight in training had fallen in love with a peasant boy, and… well, Ambrosius was a friend he’d gained recently. He couldn’t let this go, yet. “I don’t really have a favorite. You?”
“Well,” Ambrosius said, letting his eyes wander over the various texts Ballister had laid out. “Ah! This book!”
Ambrosius stretched over Ballister, carefully removing one of the books at the bottom of the stack.
“This was a collection of fables I used to love as a kid. My mother used to read them to me. The Frog and the Lily, The Greedy Monster, The Committed Companion- all retellings of classics, of course. Some would question my taste in fables,” Ambrosius laughed, still listing some more. “Oh, and I adored The Joyous Knight. I think my mother ended up hating that story after I had asked her to read it for the hundredth time, but she did it anyway.”
Ballister closed his mouth, realising he’d been holding it open in awe. “Well, yeah. Actually, that was one of my favorites as well. Even as a child.”
“You read these as a kid too?”
“I think my mother found a used copy of it and bought it for me when I started showing an interest in Knights and stuff. Most of the pages were bent, and I never heard of such a story of The Frog and the Lily. It must have been torn out. But, yeah. And I just read The Joyous Knight. Sad tale, actually. Bentley the Bold and Ainsley of Ashborough were destined to tragedy despite their love for eachother.” Ballister went red. “Not- I mean, that’s how I read it, not that you have to read it like that either. A lot of people have annotated the tale as a powerful story about friendship- and that’s great, actually!”
“Bentley and Ainsley definitely had something going on, and I think that something was a little more than friendship,” Ambrosius laughed.
“Yep. Anyway, I’m glad I’m not the only one who enjoys romance-tragedies.”
“Bentley,” said Ambrosius.
“Yeah?”
“Bentley the Bold,” he said again. “You still looking for an alliteration?”
It clicked. “Bold-heart?”
“Yeah! Is it not fitting? I mean, the director even called your choice of armor bold. Plus, some of the witty responses you’ve had in class- it’s perfect!”
Ballister was almost taken aback realising Ambrosius had paid any attention.
“Of course, it’s your decision. I don’t know why I’m saying it’s perfect. You’re the one who is taking the name.”
“It does have a nice ring to it,” Ballister agreed.
“Well, Sir Boldheart,” said Ambrosius, “did you find all that you were looking for?”
Ballister smiled. “I think I did.”
-
Ambrosius continued to call him Boldheart to see if the name really stuck. And, while Ballister had a deep attachment to Blackheart, this new name sounded much less pirate-y and more knight-ly.
“Bal!”
Ballister turned only to be violently pushed to the side by Todd.
“Watch it, man!”
“Sorry, Bal, ” Todd sneered, giving Ambrosius a look as the herd steadily streamed out of the classroom. Ambrosius was practically the last one out.
“I’m sorry,” Ambrosius almost immediately apologised. “I have no clue where that came from.”
“Honestly?” Ballister said, “it’s kind of endearing.”
Ambrosius seemed to perk up. The two walked together to the library, and eventually to their night Knight class. Ambrosius was even kind enough to walk with Ballister to his room before parting ways.
The two walked the stage together for their Year 1 ending ceremony. Ambrosius watched with bright eyes, encouraging Ballister to announce to the public, he, Ballister Boldheart (and 'Bal' to his friends), was ready to serve the Realm and the Queen, and the next coming years he would train to become a real Knight of the Realm.