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"Guys, guess what!" Cleo sat excitedly at the table where her and her friends always gathered for lunch.
"What is it this time? Have you finally learned to pay attention and not interrupt others so you can talk about yourself?" Joan grumbled, a slight annoyance could be read on her face.
" No... " she ruffles through her bag before setting a piece of paper in the middle of the table. "I have a secret admirer!" A radiant smile spread across Cleo's face.
"What?" Frida slightly choked on her water as Joan and Harriet read the paper.
"Yeah, I just got this letter in my locker this morning!" Cleo said proudly.
"Oh, my god, Cleo, this is so romantic!" Harriet teared up.
"Right? This is the sweetest thing I've ever read!" Joan said as she showed the letter to Frida, who didn't seem as moved as the others.
"But who could it be? I mean, let's face it, not many people in this school could write something as beautiful as that. " Harriet pointed out.
"I bet it's a cute shy guy we've never seen before. There are a lot of hot nerds out there, you know." Cleo said as she reapplied her lipstick.
"We should totally try to find him!" Joan suggested. Frida's eyes went wide.
"I don't know, guys. I mean, if they wanted Cleo to know who they were, they probably would've signed their name." She spoke up, a slight shakiness in her voice, avoiding her friends' eyes.
"Oh, please, it's fine. What would be the point of writing a love letter if you never revealed your identity? Besides, there is a name." Cleo took the letter back and signalled the end of the letter. "Brownie."
Frida mentally cursed herself for that. It was such an obvious code name, they'd all figure out the person who wrote the letter was her and never want to speak to her again. They'd probably leave her on the spot. If only she'd been more creative instead of just switching letters around about her most notable feature.
"Brownie? What kind of name is that?" Joan wondered. Frida felt a wave of relief pass through her.
"Are there any clones with those letters in his name?" Harriet asked.
"Maybe he just likes brownies, but it's still better than nothing!" Cleo said.
"Right. Well, anyway, we've gotta find who this guy is, and I know just where to start!" Harriet claimed.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Harriet, no one ever comes here, I doubt we'll find anyone." Joan pointed out as they entered the room.
"Well, whoever wrote this has gotta be smart, and what kind of smart person doesn't go to the library?" Harriet argued back.
Cleo had a disgusted look on her face. "Harriet, not even the janitor bothers coming in here. It's as dirty as a... those things pigs live in."
"Well, you never know! You've gotta check every spot to make sure you find the guy." Harriet tried to justify herself. "So, Cleo, you and Frida look to the left. Joan and I will look on the right."
The group nodded and went their separate ways.
Frida didn't even bother pretending to look around. This was probably the most embarrassing experience of her life. She just wanted to get her feelings for Cleo out before she blurted them all out to her. She didn't expect Cleo to care, much less to show the group the letter and try to find whoever wrote it. She'd always assumed Cleo received tons of love letters from all kinds of guys, and girls, probably, so this shouldn't have been new to her.
Frida snapped back to reality to the sound of Cleo scolding her. "Frida! Help me out here, you're not even searching!"
"Well, Cleo, I don't like this, okay?" Frida snapped at her. "It feels weird that you just showed us someone's letter where they're opening up about their feelings." Frida grumbled.
"It's fine, what he doesn't know won't hurt him." Cleo brushed off Frida's statement.
"Still, it feels like an invasion of privacy." Frida crossed her arms and laid back on a bookshelf, looking down.
"Well, it wouldn't make sense for some guy to write me a letter and expect me to not go looking for him with my friends. That's what happens every time someone gets a love letter."
Frida didn't have a retort. She knew Cleo was right. It was the typical high school experience for any girl as beautiful as Cleo. Get a letter, show your friends, find the guy. Hell, if Frida had gotten a letter, she would've probably shown it to her friends too.
"Guys, guys! I found someone!" Harriet ran over to the two girls and dragged them to a corner of the library.
The four girls hid behind an old tall bookshelf, peeking over the corner to look at the potential admirer, who was currently sitting, reading a book. He was slim and pale and had short dark curly hair.
"He's gotta be our guy!" Harriet said excitedly.
"Cleo, you've gotta talk to him." Joan added.
"On it." Cleo double-checked her makeup in her mirror and walked up to him.
The other girls still peeked their heads over the side of the bookshelf to watch them talk. Frida could see how the two of them hit it off almost immediately. She could see Cleo getting awfully touchy with him, even though she had only met him a minute before. She could see Cleo blatantly flirting with him as she always does, and she could see him getting flustered over it. She could see the smiles they both had and she couldn't take it anymore. She hid back behind the bookshelf, her head thrown back, her hands covering her face. She could hear the laughter coming from the two.
After a while, Frida finally heard footsteps make their way to where the girls are. She felt at ease for less than a second before she got reminded of the situation she was in.
"How did it go?"
"What's his name?"
"Is he even cuter upclose?"
"Who was he a clone of?"
"What was he reading?"
"Did you ask him about the letter?"
Joan and Harriet press Cleo with millions of questions in a row as they leave the library before she can even answer one. They gang up at her sides as Frida walks behind them silently.
"His name is George. I think he's the clone of some kind of poet or something like that." Cleo shrugged, unable to hide her bright smile.
"A romantic poet, I'll bet!" Joan elbowed Cleo's side.
"Well, he was reading a romantic book." Cleo added, which got both girls squealing.
"See! I knew we should've looked in there, he's definitely your admirer!" Harriet claimed.
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves. There's still a big chance that he didn't write the letter. There are a lot of people we don't know in this school, so we should keep looking." Joan added.
"You're right. And where's the fun in stopping at one guy, anyway?" The two girls at her side nodded in agreement. "Frida, what about you? What do you say?" Cleo turned to her, smiling from ear to ear. Frida looked up quickly.
From what Frida had heard and seen when her friends, the most important people to her, were talking, she could tell this made them happy. Especially Cleo. Cleo with her bright smile. She had practically been beaming since she showed them the letter. She couldn't disappoint her, nor did she want to ruin all the fun they were having. She'd just have to suck it up and play along. Seeing Cleo this happy made her happy, and that's what mattered, right? If she kept writing letters and helping look for "Brownie", Cleo would be happy. Plus, Frida would still get to get her feelings out instead of bottling them up. It was a win-win. Right?
"Okay. I'm in." The three girls squealed once again, pulling Frida in for a tight embrace.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
It had been a few days since Cleo received her first letter. Frida had been writing new letters to Cleo almost every day. She'd even help find guys that could be the author of those letters. As bothersome as letting Cleo fall for someone else might've been, Frida enjoyed writing to Cleo. The words came pouring out of her, and every time she'd start a new letter, she felt as though she could finally get all the pent-up feelings off her chest.
By now, the group had set up a meeting point for every morning, in the chance that any of them had updates on the case. Like when Cleo would finally arrive with a new letter in hand that day, Frida had assumed, since she'd left a letter in her locker the night before.
And, as expected, Cleo came running with that same beautiful smile on her face.
"Guys! I got a new letter, and this one's even cuter than the last!" Cleo held the letter to her chest.
"What's it say?" Harriet and Joan said in unison.
Cleo cleared her throat, putting on her best poet voice.
" There is a flower inside me that blooms in your faintest shadow
There is a heart that beats to life in the rocks as you walk above
The trees, the grass, the chirping cicadas call out joyously
'Come to me'
'Come to me' "
Joan lets out a high-pitched squeal. "I've never been so moved!" she holds her hands up to her mouth.
"Oh, my god, Cleo, I don't even know this guy and I would marry him in a second!" Harriet said.
"Even I'm smitten." Frida chimed in smugly. Seeing her friends this cheerful made her feel better. But, most importantly, she was proud of herself and grateful that her letters filled Cleo with such joy.
"God, I can't wait to figure out who's writing these!" Cleo carefully put the letter in her bag.
"Oh, that reminds me!" Joan speaks up. "Yesterday, after school, I saw this really cute guy that was all by himself, taking pictures around school. He could be your guy!" Joan said. "If I remember correctly, he was standing by one of the trees over there.." Joan pointed to the other side of the school building.
"Well, what are we waiting for? Show us the spot!" Cleo said excitedly.
And with that, Joan led the group to the opposite side of school, where she remembered seeing the photographer. Frida didn't necessarily enjoy this part of their routine, but she wasn't going to let her friends down. It was all innocent fun, anyway right? It's not like they were hurting anyone.
"Look, look! There he is." Joan pointed to a skinny brunette with pale skin who took pictures of anything and everything he could see.
"He's cute," Cleo bit her lip "I hope he's the right guy."
"Well, what are you waiting for? Go talk to him!" Harriet gives Cleo a little push in the boy's direction.
This was probably the most unpleasant part of Frida's days. No, not probably, definitely. She hates having to watch Cleo flirt with other guys. It should be her she's flirting with. After all, she was the one behind the letters. She deserved the credit, the gratitude, the affection Cleo gave them. She was supposed to be the one Cleo flirted with and gave all her attention to.
"So, what do you think?" Joan asked as Cleo made her way back to the three girls who had been watching the interaction from afar.
"Pretty cute. He's definitely going on the list of possible guys." A list that was getting too long for Frida's liking. They'd never realized how many clones this school had before.
"I did see he had some sort of notebook too..." Cleo added as they began walking. "That's gotta be a sign!" Cleo said, now convinced he was the one who had written the letters.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
It had been a couple of weeks now. Cleo had been getting closer and closer to Robert, the photographer, and had been working up the courage to finally ask him about the letters. It was getting exhausting for Frida to keep writing letters she'd never get to reveal were hers. To keep writing letters another man would take credit for. To keep writing letters for Cleo to fall in love with someone else. But she was used to it by now. She understood Cleo would never be hers, and she would never be Cleo's. She wasn't even in Cleo's league, for God's sake. It was clear that Cleo would never give her the time of day if she found out, but, this way, at least Frida got to voice her emotions in some way.
It was late after school, there was only a handful of students still roaming around the school grounds. The sky was dark and a single light illuminated the hallway.
Frida was wearing her usual black hood, making sure to cover her face as she made her way to Cleo's locker. Even with the little amount of students here, she couldn't risk getting caught.
But as she took the newly written letter to put it in Cleo's locker, a hand grabbed her arm and spun her around, making her hood fall off, revealing her face.
"Why, hello there—" Cleo began before realizing who she was speaking to. "Frida?" Cleo was taken aback. Out of everyone in this school, Frida was probably the one she'd expected to see the least.
"Cleo, I—" Frida wanted to speak up, but she couldn't find the words. She didn't know what to say. She never wanted Cleo to find out this way. Hell, she didn't want Cleo to find out at all.
"Frida..." Cleo drops the other girl's hand. "What are you doing here? You're not the one who's been writing me letters, are you? You're just helping someone... right?" Cleo sounds desperate as she tries to make sense of the situation.
"No, I... I'm the one who wrote the letters. All of them." Frida looked down, ashamed. "Look, I didn't want you to find out like this. I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."
"No." Frida looks up at Cleo, stunned. "No, I don't believe you. It couldn't have been you, I mean, it just doesn't make sense! Stop trying to cover up—"
"Cleo, why would I lie about that?" Frida asks in disbelief.
"I don't know, but it can't be you! I just know it wasn't." Cleo crosses her arms.
The two girls stay there for what seems like an eternity in silence. Neither knew what to say. Frida wasn't sure what to do. She could either go along with what Cleo thinks and lie, or she could tell her the truth and get it over with. Even if she lied, there'd be tension between the two afterwards. They'd both know the truth, but pretend not to know it. Eventually, Frida made up her mind and broke the silence.
" Dearest Cleopatra,
Your voice is a perfume that fills lungs
The very wind is jealous." Frida starts, unable to look Cleo in the eye.
"Of all the hours in a day
The only time is you
You are the beat of my breath
You are the wine in my blood
You...
Are Cleo"
Frida looks up at Cleo. Cleo's eyes widen.
"That's what one of the letters said, isn't it?" Frida asked simply. "If this doesn't convince you, then I don't know what will." Frida's voice was barely above a whisper.
"But, Frida.. why?" Cleo asked after another moment of silence.
"Isn't it obvious?" Frida asked, but she could tell Cleo wouldn't be satisfied until she actually says it out loud.
"I don't want this to ruin our friendship, but... I... I like you, Cleo. I have for a while. I'm sorry." Frida's voice shakes as she confesses her feelings.
Cleo breathes out a small "Oh, God." before quickly making her way to the exit. This is exactly why Frida didn't want her to know. It was fun at the start, but now it had ruined her and her favourite person's relationship.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The next day, neither Frida nor Cleo met up with the group at their usual morning spot. Anytime the two passed by each other or met each other's gaze, they'd quickly move along to get as far from each other as they could. Frida hated the tension she had created between them, but she knew she couldn't go back. She'd just have to accept her fate.
At lunch time, Cleo was the last to arrive. Her usual smile was nowhere to be seen. Frida had already been asked millions of questions as to why she wasn't there that morning, but Cleo wad bombarded with even more.
"Will you guys stop, already?" Cleo snapped, leaving Joan and Harriet startled.
"Oh... okay, well, is there anyone new you think could've written the letters?" Harriet asked with a faint smile. Cleo glanced at Frida.
"You know, I don't think we should do this anymore." Cleo admitted.
"What? Why not? You seemed really into it until today." Joan asked.
"Yeah, well... It's like Frida said. If they wanted me to know who they were, they'd tell me." Cleo looked at Frida once again.
"But it's so much fun! Plus, who knows, you might find the love of your life through those letters." Harriet smiled, trying to convince Cleo to continue on with their little game. Frida choked on her water as she heard the words. " The love of your life," she thought back as she looked at her untouched lunch. A girl like Cleo wouldn't even get with a girl like Frida, much less be the love of her life.
"Oh, stop being ridiculous. That doesn't happen in real life." Cleo brushed it off.
Joan and Harriet seemed slightly down once they'd realized Cleo wouldn't change her mind. Frida was down too, but not for the same reasons. She knew what Cleo said was true, but it still hurt to hear her say it. Especially since Cleo was basically saying she would never love Frida in the same way Frida does towards Cleo.
The rest of the day passed in a blur. Joan and Harriet tried to find new ways of entertaining themselves, and Frida and Cleo had barely spoken up for the rest of the day. Frida hadn't even uttered a single word that day.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A few weeks had passed since the incident. The group was gradually going back to normal, but Frida and Cleo still weren't on speaking terms. Whenever they were left alone, they would find any excuse possible to get away from each other. Or, at least, Frida did.
Cleo seemed to have stopped trying to avoid Frida, she even tried to hang out with her at times, but Frida still hadn't recovered from what went down between them. Every time Cleo tried to get her attention, Frida would either hide or run away. She knew it hurt Cleo, and that was the last thing she wanted, but she couldn't bring herself to confront her. Not yet. She needed more time. Her feelings for Cleo had somehow not gone down at all after the rejection. If anything, her feelings grew stronger.
But she knew she couldn't avoid Cleo forever. One day, she'd have to face her and move on. She'd at least have her friend back once that day comes.
The sun was beginning to set as Frida sat on a pile of dead leaves, her back resting against a tree. She drew anything and everything that came to mind. Drawing had always helped her take her mind off things. It was therapeutic for her. The moment didn't last long, though, and she heard a voice calling her name.
"Frida!" Cleo stood behind her, her fists clenched and eyebrows furrowed.
"Cleo!" Frida giggled as to not make things to awkward despite the very obvious anger Cleo showed. "What are you doing her—"
"I have been trying to talk to you for ages, and what do you do? You avoid me like I'm some sort of deadly disease!" Cleo glared at her. "I know you're still upset over what happened, but that's no reason to avoid me!"
"I know, I'm sor—"
"I've been trying to talk to you about something important! But you keep running away anytime I even come close to you!" Cleo walked up to where Frida sat.
"Do you really hate me that much?!" Cleo grabbed Frida's arm and brought her up to her feet.
"What? Cleo, I could never hate—"
"Then why won't you talk to me?" Frida noticed a shift in Cleo's expression. Cleo's eyes watered as Frida thought of what to say.
"Cleo, I'm sorry, I just... I don't feel like I'm ready to talk to you, yet... I'm still trying to move on, you know." Cleo's grip on her arm loosened.
"Well, you can stop trying." Cleo tried to appear confident, yet couldn't seem to look Frida in the eye.
"What do you mean?" Frida's mind must have been playing tricks on her. There was no way Cleo meant what she thought that sentence could mean.
"You can stop trying to move on from me, because I.. I..." Cleo's words got stuck in her throat. "Because I like you, okay? It took me a while to figure out, but I like you. I was scared of admitting it, but I do. Ever since I met you." Cleo whispers the last sentence. Frida felt Cleo's hand shaking as it still held onto her arm.
"Are you... serious?" Frida couldn't believe her ears.
"Yes! Why would I lie about something like that?" Cleo's hand tightened around Frida's arm, offended at the question.
"I don't know, I just... I never imagined you could feel the same way about me." Frida felt her face heat.
"Why wouldn't I? You're my dream girl: talented, hot, adorable, hilarious, and smart. You're the whole package." Cleo winked at her and pulled her closer, making Frida's cheeks turn a bright shade of red. Cleo smiles that same beautiful delightful smile Frida adored and missed before pulling her in for a kiss.
In that moment, everything felt right. Finally being with the girl she loved, finally being able to kiss her as the sun set and the autumn leaves fell around them.
It might seem ridiculous, cliched, early, and even dumb, but both girls feel as though they'd finally realized who the love of their lives were, and they couldn't be happier about it.