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Chapter Text

"Are you out of your dear mind?" Sunoo's voice echoed in their room, Jungwon's head shooting up at what Jaeyun just said.

They were sitting in the eldest omega's room, talking after three full days of not seeing one another.

"Sunoo, I'm too old to marry now", he exhales and, with great difficulty, looks at the two other omegas, both on his bed, "You know we need the money father cannot get right now. And there is a much bigger chance of me getting a good pay as a governess than marrying rich. To someone I at least like."

The two omegas knew that that was probably true. Their father couldn't afford to let all three of them live off of his money. Their family used to get money from their father's allowance that he got as a mayor of their town, but, as he is retired now, none of them can afford to stay here for very long.

Jaeyun has overdue his stay here anyway.

He is reaching 22, far too old for an omega to marry good now. Someone should take pity on him and marry him then.

When Jaeyun was 15, at his first ball that he attended with his parents, he met a young alpha that lived up to his expectations. Look-wise he was a given wonder, and his manners didn't disappoint. However, Jaeyun left that ball without the alpha's name, age or anything besides the fact that he knew his passion was art. He did not get a good whiff of his scent, assuming the alpha wore some aromatic oils.

Jaeyun would like to think of him as his first love. They have spent that lovely evening wondering the gardens and not one ball came near that one. Jaeyun had the most fun there and he will always think of that alpha as the first alpha that liked him. 

And alphas after, that talked to Jaeyun and wanted to ask for his hand in marriage, never met his expectations.

He has told the story of that alpha only to his mother on their way home. She said that the alpha, the mere boy, wouldn't make not even close to a fortune if he proceeds to be an artist. Jaeyun kept quiet.

His third ball was with his younger brother, Sunoo.

Sunoo, now 20, has a much more fulfilling love life than Jaeyun. He is dancing around a tall alpha sergeant with broad shoulders and white pearly teeth. Their relationship can best be described as complicated, but the both of them are well aware that at any moment now, they shall marry, for both their families sake.

The sergeant was first a friend of Jaeyun's, an alpha who made sure he came home safe when their butler couldn't be there to pick him up from the park. They've known each other since very little, and most thought that the two would mate and marry one day. However, once sergeant Park Sunghoon met Sunoo, Jaeyun's younger brother, that all was wiped away.

Jaeyun was happy about his friend and brother, but he couldn't help but imagine what if it was him? Because Park Sunghoon was a good alpha, an alpha that respectfully teases and thoughtfully remarks people, omegas and alphas alike. Jaeyun wouldn't be too sad to marry such an alpha.

That is, until he was 15 and met an artist that made his breath get caught in his throat.

Jungwon, the youngest of the three, only 17, is set to marry a colonel at the age of 18, Park Jongseong. Jungwon hadn't met him yet, but since he was 14, they've been exchanging letters.

It freaked Jaeyun out when he was 19 and they started exchanging letters. Park Jongseong is his age, 19 at the time, today 22. He couldn't imagine that his baby brother was talking to one of his peers.

And even then, when their parents made Jungwon the bait, made him the sacrificial lamb of the family and threw him out there for a colonel to marry, Jaeyun felt envy run down his spine. He felt as if their parents knew no one would want Jaeyun, albeit young and ready to marry.

That didn't mean Jaeyun had no suiters when he was younger. He had plenty, and they all made him feel better, but none of them made him feel the thrill and rush that the alpha boy from his first ball did. Maybe his family knew he had standards too high for his own good? But that wouldn't stand in the way of making some money, would it?

At first, Sunoo was their choice to marry off. Sweet, adorable and sugary to the eyes, appealing, soft and delicate. However, Sunoo fought greatly for his right to choose, and their parents knew well that their Sunoo was well over promised to Park Sunghoon, then future sergeant of their army.

When they came to Jungwon, the youngest omega only blushed in embarrassment before nodding his head. He didn't have anything to lose since he didn't know what he could lose.

"Jaeyun hyung, this cannot be your last resort!" Sunoo still stood in his place, voice slightly high in pitch. Jungwon was laying on his stomach, watching the exchange.

"Sunoo", Jaeyun started, "Must you be so loud? I do not see a bad thing in being a teacher to young omegas and alphas! We had our own governess, didn't we? Remember Mrs. Sooyoung? She was so very lovely that we are in contact to this day!"

Sunoo was about to spurt some more nonsense before Jungwon sat up, "Sunoo hyung will you calm down for a second?" He pleaded, one of his hands grabbing his older brothers dress and sitting him down, "Jaeyun has the right to choose what he wishes to do with his life. We don't have a say in this."

And Sunoo, albeit with slight hesitation, calmed down and exhaled, "I apologize, hyung, but I cannot help to think how much better it would be for you to marry than for you to work."

And Jaeyun saw that. He was aware that it would be much better than working everyday and dealing with good and bad kids. But he was smart and intelligent. He felt as if his brain would go to waste if he doesn't pass this knowledge along.

Mrs. Sooyoung favored Jaeyun all throughout their childhood.

Jungwon was very calm and collected but imaginative. He thought too hard about the unimportant and as such, didn't impress their governess as she was a woman of hard work and diligent studying.

Sunoo was a free spirit that couldn't care less about reading and acting as the good omega their governess wanted them to be. He looked the part, sure, bute acted too freely for her liking.

Jaeyun was, like Jungwon, calm and collected, however what differed from his younger brother was his passion for wanting to know more from their governess. When Mrs. Sooyoung thought them about whatever they were to be thought, Jaeyun would diligently absorb it all and talk about those topics with her.

Mrs. Sooyoung used to tell Jaeyun one sentence over their teaching period: Jaeyun, my dearest omega, don't ever marry an alpha that isn't as intelligent as you.

It might've been this sentence that put him in this place first, unmarried and alone. Because that was the root of his relations with alphas.

Any time he met an alpha that took an interest in him, he asked him a few questions and realized, through time, none of them were even half as educated as Jaeyun himself. And that was saying a lot, he was an omega in an alpha world. Which led him to rejecting most marriage proposals he had gotten. And those he hasn't gotten... He will forever think about.

Mrs. Sooyoung had many hard opinions about their family. She was very adamant on 'fixing' Sunoo's wild behavior and 'taming' Jungwon's curiosity. She told Sunoo that he would never have an alpha that will like his wild brain and senseless decisions.

Yet, Sunoo found Sunghoon Park. A boy that swore on his grave that he shall wed Sunoo once he's free of duty in the land and returns to the city for good. For now, the two see each other about once every month, at the ball their town sets. And there, everyone could see their bond shine.

If not at a ball, sergeant Park sometimes stops by their house when his unit is placed near the city. Overall, their bond is strong, considering the little time they have with each other.

Mrs. Sooyoung was right about many things, but she never anticipated an even wilder Park Sunghoon coming after Sunoo.

The sergeant was one of great focus and aim, however when with Sunoo, he was playful and fun, always eager to share stories and entertain his future spouse.

Mrs. Sooyoung also told Jungwon that his future alpha will be one of not much brain to choose a scrawny little omega and mate with him.

Because after mating came children and family life, which, according to Mrs. Sooyoung, Jungwon wasn't capable of.

Day today, Jungwon gets insecure when a certain Park Jongseong mentions mating and family, because really, when he saw him, would he want a family with him? Maybe that's the reason Jungwon agreed to be engaged to someone he doesn't even know. He wants to be loved, he wants it dearly.

Jungwon got this whole arranged engagement after their father found out about the town wanting to put him away as their first mayor. He had to secure some money, so he reached out to his friends from other towns and secured Jungwon to a wealthy family, the family giving half the price of marrying Jungwon then, which still gives their family security.

"Hyung, she was lovely only to you", Sunoo rolls his eyes, "We always got on her nerves", he added and threw himself back on the bed, his back hitting Jaeyun's soft mattress.

Jaeyun exhaled at that, "Whatever she told you two wasn't the truth. She just wanted to scare you into submission", he says and Sunoo scoffs.

"And she never did that to you because you were so submissive? Hyung, you stand your ground better than most alphas in this town", he smiles gently at the older, the older exhaling.

"Exactly why it would be best to be a governess", he says and Sunoo momentarily stops smiling, Jungwon sighing.

"If that's really what you think is best for you, we will always support you, always know that", Sunoo finished, standing up and walking to the eldest omega, hugging him by his neck.

Jungwon hummed in agreement, going to the two and hugging them both.

-

He cannot get his hopes up.

He is aware that this job of being a nurse to the old lady in their town isn't what he wishes to be in his life, care for the elderly and disabled, however he is eager to apply to this job because he has to start somewhere.

But how could he be better than so many omegas that applied to the same position? He isn't half as skilled as Miyeon Cho from a couple blocks away, or half as lovely as Hyunjin from the family of smiths.

However he is sure to give his best to lady Lee.

Lady Lee wasn't rich. She wasn't half as rich as they used to be when their father was the mayor. However, she was hiring and Jaeyun wanted to be hired.

Plenty of omegas with dresses less lavishing than Jaeyun's sat in that room. Most of them were talking amongst themselves, some gossiping about why the last mayor's eldest son was here.

Jaeyun understands why they are asking that, he would ask the same if not in this place.

For a split moment, he felt like he was stealing a spot for one of these omegas. Most of them come from lower income families than him, however he is still trying for the same job as them. If Sunoo was near him, he would say how they probably feel honored that they have been given a chance near someone as the one of the Sim omegas.

He watched as one by one, the omegas stood up and walked into the room where lady Lee was summoning them, taking to them one by one. All of them exited smiling and brightly leaving. Jaeyun wonders if for him it would be the same.

Once he hears his name being said by the tall butler by the door, he stands up and goes to enter the room, taking one last glance at the omegas who were all watching him.

If he succeeds in getting this job, his family, that isn't in the worst debt of all, will get money while they, who might need the job more, will not succeed. And that scares Jaeyun.

If he gets the job, he helps his family, but sets back families of so many omegas waiting here, probably to uphold their families.

He sighs shakily.

Should he do good or do bad here?

-

Dearest Jongseongie-hyungie,

I am deeply sorry for not being able to write back to you these couple of weeks. I was itching to write you a letter, but a lot was happening here at home, and I wanted to put it all into one letter.

Mother wanted to gear us all up for the incoming ball, more than before. She wants Sunoo-hyung to be engaged by the next ball, which means she wants Jaeyunnie-hyung and I to care for him more than before, so he looks as sweet as ever to meet his beloved at the ball.

Jaeyunnie-hyung has also been wanting to help father and wants to become a governess. Sunoo-hyung isn't very fond of that but he knows that he should not dote on him too much, for he is his own person and commander now, with him being an unwedded omega.

Jaeyunnie-hyung has been searching for a governess job these past two weeks but he hadn't been of much luck. At the moment he is helping one sick lady in our town as her nurse. She is lovely and Jaeyunnie is fond of her, but she isn't of rich decent, so the pay isn't so good as to help us  much.

That's why Jaeyunnie isn't at home as much. So I am left with Sunoo and his wishes. He doesn't wish a lot these past few days. He has been praying diligently. I think he's afraid sergeant Park will not agree to marry. I think that is utterly foolish.

Father is still barely making ends meet and if Sunoo is to be wedded, it would help out a lot.

I know that by now, you are eager to send us money and goods, for I know that this might concern you, hyung. But just know that I won't except it. You've helped us heaps over the time and I do not think I could be of any more embarrassment than now.

How have you been, hyung? Are things going well with the commanders? You know I am always there for you and you can tell me anything.

Please write back when you can,

My sincerest wishes to you, my beloved.

Your Jungwonnie.

-

Lady Lee was a well respected albeit a bit poor old lady that resided in their town from the moment it was built.

She wasn't too hard to handle, clingy - yes, but she was never too much. Jaeyun got along with her just fine. She needed help and Jaeyun was there to help her.

His pay wasn't anything grand, some less shillings than if he worked as a governess for a town family.

However her mediocre state in society, she loved the balls this town made.

She would dress in one of her old dresses and sit around, talking to her friends and watching young couples dance.

Usually, she would ask one of her friends for advice and help in dressing up, however with Jaeyun, she was well equipped with help and opinion.

"Lady Lee", the guards greet her, "You look quite nice tonight", they said, bowing to the lady and Jaeyun, letting them inside.

"All thanks to my helping hand", she smiles, gripping Jaeyun's forearm. Jaeyun shared a fond look with her, the two omegas making their way to one of the corners of the room, on the way there they both take a glass of red wine to accommodate themselves.

Once there, Jaeyun looks around to find his two brothers and his parents.

While his eyes are flitting over the people there, they meet a tall figure clad in red uniform. Jaeyun smiles and waves at the alpha that makes eye contact with him.

Lady Lee watches him for a second before her face turns into one of recognition, "Sergeant Park", she says when the male is close to the two, the two omegas bowing to him before the alpha does so too.

"Lady Lee", he says, taking her hand and kissing it before turning to Jaeyun, "Jaeyunnie", his smile is bigger now and so is Jaeyun's.

"Sunghoonie", he says and almost goes for a hug, before he backtracks. They're in public and it would be highly inappropriate to hug or even touch an alpha who isn't your wedded spouse. It's even worse when one of them is to be wedded and the other is not. He shouldn't be calling him Sunghoonie either.

They avert their eyes to lady Lee who was already looking at the distance, waving to another elderly lady. The lady trudges her way to their corner and starts a talk with lady Lee, loud enough for the other two to whisper to each other unknowingly.

"So", the alpha starts, "Where shall I find your brother?" He asks and Jaeyun hums, looking around once more.

"I do not think my family has arrived yet. I accompanied lady Lee here", the omega says and the alpha leans his back on the wall behind them.

It's quiet for a few seconds, neither knowing what to say. Jaeyun hadn't seen the alpha in a while, approximately about 2 months ago since he was sick to go to the last month's ball.

Sunghoon decided to break it, "I have heard you decided to become a governess", he speaks up and Jaeyun resists the urge to roll his eyes.

"If you want to belittle my decision, you should just keep quiet", he says and looks away, at the two old omegas next to them that were laughing quietly.

Sunghoon snorts, "Why would I do such things?" He questions and Jaeyun quickly turns his head to him, "If anything, it is a brave act. And as a part of the military, I condone bravery, dear Jaeyun."

Jaeyun is left speechless for a second. No one has reacted good to his decision of becoming a governess, "Oh", he clears his throat, "You are the first person to think so", he tells him and Sunghoon just gently smiles.

"I am aware that most omegas your age are aching for an alpha to uphold them", Jaeyun rolls his eyes, "And you're opposing that. And it is very brave of you, dear Jaeyunnie, to go against the common people."

Jaeyun feels a smile creep up his features. Sunghoon could really surprise him sometimes. He's a special alpha to think that way.

When he makes that revelation, he remembers his parents nagging him and Jungwon to pester and pamper Sunoo up for this evening. Sunghoon should ask Sunoo to marry him already.

Jaeyun is aware that Sunoo will not confront him when it comes to this situation. So, as any good older sibling would do, he takes matters into his own hands.

"So, dearest Sunghoon", Jaeyun starts, looking up at him, "When shall you marry to my brother?" He asks, not wanting to prolong this.

Sunghoon's face reddens when he hears the words, inhaling sharply at them and looking away, "What might you mean of that?"

Jaeyun smirks, "You know Sunoo is expecting something of you. We all, as a family, are. We all like you and want you with us. With Sunoo", he wants to appear gentle and as a voice of advice and reason so his voice goes an octave higher. It seems to ease Sunghoon.

"You are aware that you want Sunoo to be an omega of a sergeant? We travel quite often, so you know. Do you think Sunoo will mind it? If he will, he'll have to wait some more time so I can move up in the range of officers."

Jaeyun is aware of it. So he smiles and puts his chin up, "And are you, sergeant Park, well aware that my brother is in love with you and willing to follow you wherever? Because if you aren't, I will have to enlighten you."

Sunghoon's ears are a bright red and Jaeyun is ready to tease him some more when the sergeant cleared his throat, but lady Lee spoke up next to them, "Sergeant Park?"

The both of them seem to straighten their back at her voice.

"Yes, lady Lee?" The tall sergeant asks back politely, a slight smile adorning his features, trying to appeal to the woman.

"Can I speak to you for a moment?" She asks him, turning her eyes from her friend to Jaeyun, "Alone, if that is possible."

And that's how Jaeyun found his place at a table with two other older omegas, both friends of lady Lee. He couldn't stop wondering what they were talking about. Lady Lee and Park Sunghoon know each other only from residing in the same town, that was it.

Once they both started glancing his way as they talked, he grew anxious.

Does it have something to do with him? Maybe lady Lee doesn't like him so she's trying to convince Sunghoon to not marry Sunoo. Oh god, everything but that! That is the single good deed that they were all hoping for! Especially Sunoo!

"Well what might you be thinking about?" He's startled out of his skin when the smooth voice graces his ears, the omega looking to his left where a cat like smile resided on a pair of pretty, soft lips.

"Nothing important. My employer is talking to our brother's future alpha", he huffs and fans his face.

He's been at the house of lady Lee almost full time since he started working, meeting with his family over the weekend and in town with lady Lee alongside him.

That's why his breath gets caught in his throat at his younger brother's look.

He wears a light pink gown with long sleeves and a matching head band that has two thin stripes going down his back and through the whole length of the dress. His dark hair is slightly curly, and his dainty fingers fidget anxiously under the older omega's gaze. His lips are fuller than usual, his eyes also a bit bigger.

"Weren't we supposed to let Sunoo shine tonight?" Jaeyun quirks up a brow, the two meeting eyes for a second. Jungwon takes a seat next to the older and leans on his shoulder.

Jaeyun feels underdressed. He's wearing a light green dress with short sleeves and a pair of white lace gloves. Even his shoes are his normal working ones.

"You haven't seen Sunoo", Jungwon says, "He looks like the most beautiful flower in a garden full of the most beautiful flowers!"

Jaeyun slightly smiles at his brother's choice of words but doesn't say anything about it. He instead looks around the room in search of said flower.

"Where is Sunoo? Since I see you here - oh and father is over there! - but not him, nor mother", he says and scans the room one more time.

"They're in the garden", he says and smiles even bigger, "And I was sent here to get sergeant Park out of here and to Sunoo-hyung", he gently giggles and Jaeyun smiles, "Care to join, hyung?"

He doesn't say anything, just stands up and throws out a hand at Jungwon, the younger taking it gleefully.

Jaeyun can't imagine what they look like. Jungwon, like the pretties omega in the room and Jaeyun, like a maid to him. His cheeks redden at that but he doesn't give it more thought. This isn't about him.

They reach Sunghoon and lady Lee, lady Lee stopping from her rambling to look at the two. The brothers bow and the two who were talking do as well, now all four smiling.

"Sergeant Park", Jungwon starts, a smile itching to get on his face, "Might you accompany me to the gardens? Jaeyunnie-hyung has the duty of looking after the beautiful lady Lee tonight", he says, bowing to the elder omega before looking back up at the sergeant.

"It would be my pleasure", they both bow to lady Lee and Jaeyun, the omegas bowing back again. They part ways and Jaeyun is left smiling at the two leave.

After they disappear around a corner, lady Lee turns to him, "I should have given you my robes", she bites her lip, "I have a set that would fit you perfectly."

Jaeyun smiles at her, "No need, lady Lee. I feel quite comfortable in my wear."

Lady Lee looks him up and down, "You still are an omega son of a great man who did wonders to this town. The point that you have to make your own money is embarrassing enough, you should at least have the nicest robes, my Jaeyunnie", she smiles kindly.

Jaeyun understands that she isn't fond of him working, most older people aren't, but he doesn't blame them, they are another generation.

"Thank you, lady Lee. However I feel quite content in my robes", he says again, lady Lee nodding along and taking him by the arm, resting her head there. Jaeyun's palm grazes lady Lee's hand and they look like a mother and a son, swaying gently to the music.

Outside, Jungwon led Sunghoon to where Sunoo was supposed to be. He sees his mother gently smiling and he knows that Sunoo is in front of her, looking as lovely as ever. He clears his throat, "Sergeant Park", he gets the other's attention, "Sunoo is waiting for you there", he points with his head in a direction before smiling and bowing to the other that was standing still.

Jungwon goes in that direction, taking his mother by the arm and guiding them both inside.

Sunghoon still stands there, however when he sees the bottom of a light blue dress, he clears his throat and walks towards it.

To say that he was shocked would be an understatement.

Sunoo looked outstanding. His pale skin was accompanied with light blue. A dress with short sleeves and slight embroidery at the bottom hugged his body, his light blue lace gloves wrapping around his dainty fingers. His hair, dark and slightly curly, was half covered by a light blue hat, the straps of it going down and over his shoulders, even longer than the dress. His shoes, albeit not the best visible under the dress, were a pretty white with small dainty flowers over it.

Sunghoon was left standing there with his mouth open in awe at the pretty omega.

"Say something, sergeant", Sunoo says, averting his gaze elsewhere. He seems nervous.

Sunghoon exhales and smiles, "I do not think I have ever seen an omega as beautiful as you, Sunoo-shii", he says and it draws a blush to Sunoo's face, "Do you want to take a walk around the gardens?"

Sunoo smiled widely before nodding his head, gripping Sunghoon around his arm as they walked.

It was quiet for some seconds, Sunoo nervously looking around at the garden, pointing out pretty flowers as they walked. Sunghoon was humming when he pointed them out, but nothing more.

Jaeyun gave him a heads up, he told him his family needs him to marry and mate Sunoo, and Sunoo wants to marry him. So naturally, as a bold person that he is, he should ask Sunoo for his hand in marriage.

He gets nervous every time his eyes catch sight of the omega thought. His insides turn at his voice, his skin turns red at his eyes, his whole body vibrates when Sunoo's palm touches the arm that is holding his.

At the same time he feels guilt. If there was a war to happen and Sunghoon is a mere sergeant, not a warrant officer or a lieutenant, Sunoo shall go with him. Because sergeants don't have a paid for place to live in, their wives and omegas are to go with them and hide in the cities closest to battlefields.

And it scares Sunghoon so much, to put Sunoo in any kind of danger.

"Sergeant Park", Sunoo starts, "You seem awfully quiet this evening. Is everything alright?"

Sunghoon spares a glance at him, at his shiny eyes and pretty lips that give him butterflies.

"I.." He sighs and looks around. He should tell Sunoo his worries, tell him why he is this hesitant.

He exhales one more time and when he meets Sunoo's gaze it looks sorry and sad, as if the omega is distressed by his feelings.

Sunghoon knows it's not that, he is a part of the military and as such, he learnt how to control his scent, so Sunoo can't possibly feel his emotions.

"Sunghoon", Sunoo says his name and Sunghoon almost falls back, "You don't have to tell me what is bothering you but-"

"I wish to marry you, Sunoo. I wish to mate with you", he says it finally. Sunoo gasps and takes a hand over his mouth, looking up at the alpha with wide eyes, "I want to spend the rest of my life with you and care for you as best as I can."

A pause, Sunoo sensing Sunghoon isn't done with talking.

"That's why as a mere sergeant, I cannot put you in danger to travel with me to war. It is far too dangerous, my darling", his eyes seem sorry as his palms reach gently for Sunoo's face.

Sunoo laughs, "You know I do not care for that. You are what I want and I will go wherever with you", he tells him taking his wrists into his hands.

"Don't say such things my love. I will never forgive myself if something is to happen to you", he says, "Please, I want to wait, at least until I become a warrant officer. I do not have a place to live with you, for I share a military tent with my peers. No omega is comfortable there", he says, a stray tear rolling down his eye.

Sunoo gasps one more time, looking away briefly before making eye contact with Sunghoon, "My family... They cannot afford for me to live with them. I... I do not know where to go if not to you, my love."

Sunghoon sniffled back and brings their faces close, their foreheads touching, "My dearest Sunoo", he starts, "I wish upon all the stars that see us tonight, that my wish of marrying you is granted. I wish upon the moon that I will once be worthy of your affection. But right now, I have nothing to give you", he sniffles some more and Sunoo does as well, holding tight onto the alpha's wrists.

"Sunghoon, please, kiss me", Sunoo says, opening his eyes and putting distance between them.

Sunghoon's face, wet with tears, makes a happier expression once he sees the big eyes of his beloved, "I am forever grateful to your parents for granting me you and not taking you away. You are my biggest treasure, my love."

He kisses him then, their first kiss. Under the stars and the moon, away from praying eyes and between the flower beds. Sunghoon kisses Sunoo.

It's soft at first, lips meeting lips, their feelings unclear in it since they both are inexperienced in that field. They part for a breath before Sunoo pulls him down once more, this time with feelings.

Sunoo expresses want and sorrow for Sunghoon, expresses his wish to be with him for longer than life. Sunghoon gets ahold of those feelings and puts his hands on the omega's waist deepening it and declaring his emotions swirling from his lips to Sunoo's.

He's deeply sorry he cannot marry his love. That he cannot mate with him. His kiss conveys his deepest desire to marry him right this moment, take his teeth out and smooth the over his neck, but both are aware that that is not possible, however much Sunoo's family wishes for it.

"Sunoo get inside quickly!" They hear a familiar voice, parting from each other and putting distance between them. Sunghoon looks away as Sunoo looks at Jaeyun standing at the entry way to the gardens, mild panic written over his features.

He glances at Sunghoon, "Come with me", he tells him and Sunghoon looks down at him, carefully meeting eyes, before looking up at Jaeyun who looks hurried, one hand beckoning them to come inside.

He puts an arm on Sunoo's lower back and guides them to the other omega, the two running idly to him.

Once there Jaeyun takes Sunoo's hand and pulls him inside.

"What is the matter, brother?" Sunoo asks, eyes casting to Sunghoon who was following behind them.

"Jungwonie", Jaeyun says out of breath, "Colonel Park Jongseong is here!" He screeches out, eyes casting back to the two before back to the front.

Sunoo gasps and Sunghoon inhales quickly.

The three reach the omegas' parents, holding each other's hands and looking up at the alpha that came in, his red uniform adorned with more badges than Jaeyun had ever seen.

Lady Lee is next to their mother and Jaeyun makes an effort to stand next to her and provide her support. But right now, she was squeezing his hand in a calming manner, not the other way around.

Jungwon stood there, in the middle of the room, cheeks as pink as his dress, as the colonel got on one knee and kissed the omega's knuckles.

"Colonel Park", Jungwon utters out and the man in front of him, still kneeling, looks up at him with a soft smile.

"It's general now, my darling", he says and Jungwon, as well as his whole family, gasps and follows the man's movements as he stands up, still holding Jungwon's hand.

-

Lady Lee was a kind women. She had a house that was well kept, with it a small garden where her two dogs ran around in joy and fun as they chased one another. She was so kind to let a certain trio sit in her garden, talking over last night's events.

Jungwon was in the middle with one of his hands in Jaeyun's warm palms and the other in Sunoo's cold ones.

"I cannot believe our younger brother will be the general's omega", Sunoo mutters with a smile, his thumb going over Jungwon's knuckles.

Jungwon is a tad bit overwhelmed by everything, "I still cannot believe I've met him yesterday", he says, a small smile on his face.

Right now, his fiancé is with his father, the both of them walking around town and discussing some important matter the omega's were not invited to know.

Jaeyun only sits back and smiles, "Jungwon", he calls out to him and the youngest looks at his eldest brother, smile evident, "He looks like he really likes you", he says and Jungwon blushes again.

General Jongseong made it a big deal to everyone that Jungwon was his-to-be-omega yesterday night.

The two danced from when the alpha arrived until Jungwon was tired. They exchanged words while dancing, Jungwon smiling big before shying away and averting his gaze elsewhere from the general as to not appear too flustered.

The general was very nice and respectful and it made Jungwon's smile grow.

They've seen each other only from one picture, of fourteen year old Jungwon and nineteen year old Jongseong.

Now, Jongseong looked more grown up and polished, hair not messy but slicked back neatly, his smile shining and accentuating his sharp jaw.

"He told me I looked beautiful", Jungwon says, "And that he has never seen an omega so lovely as I", he is grinning from ear to ear as he says those words.

Sunoo and Jaeyun make eye contact, both nodding idly before sitting on the edge, their hands still intertwined with Jungwon's.

"Our dearest brother", Sunoo starts, "You seem as so he swooned you over and into his arms", he says, grin teasing.

Jungwon blushes again, taking his hands that had both of his brothers' ones in them and covers his face.

"Do not tease!" He laughs, "It is not every day you meet the alpha that is engaged to you", he shyly says, unable to stop a smile from forming.

Jaeyun laughs lightly, "Jungwonnie you look so happy", he tells him, his free hand going to caress Jungwon's cheek.

Jungwon onoy nods, "He seems like the loveliest alpha I have ever met, brothers. He is so well spoken. Only writing letters won't be enough until next year, I have to see him more after today", he says and Sunoo let's out a small laugh.

"You know that now, as a newly made general, he has more duties than ever. It brought him to our town, didn't it? However I hope it will all calm down when you two marry", Sunoo says, squeezing the youngest omega's knee.

Jungwon nods, "I hope father isn't telling him something foolish right now. Especially about our finances. I hope Jongseong doesn't mind him talking much", he says still, looking dazed and thoughtful.

Jaeyun smiles wide, "Oh? Calling him by his first name already?"

Jungwon answers to his teasing with a wide smile, "He calls me 'my darling' and 'my love'. It's different reading it from our letters and hearing it. He sounds so lovely!"

Jungwon leans back on the bench, Sunoo and Jaeyun smiling at him and leaning back as well, all giggling and smiling.

"I apologize to interrupt", a voice comes first, after it a few scents mingled up together, all of them intense to the omegas' noses.

They look to their left where their father stands with General Park and sergeant Park.

The omegas stand up and bow, all smiling at the sight of them.

"Forgive me", the general starts, Jungwon's hold on his brother's hands tightening, "However I am not sure that I have met the two of you", the alpha says as he meets eyes with both Jaeyun and Sunoo.

The omegas smile again, Sunoo getting his hand out first, "I am Sunoo, general Park, Jungwon's older brother", Sunoo says, bowing as Jongseong kisses the back of his hand.

Jongseong goes to Jaeyun and the omega pulls his hand out as well, "Jaeyun, general Park. The eldest son of our family", he says, bowing again.

The general grins at them, "I have heard lots about the two of you, you wouldn't believe it", he says and winks at Jungwon, the young omega blushing.

Their father clears his throat, "I've met general Jongseong with our town now, but I am feeling a bit tired now. Jaeyun, my dear, might you be so good to lead me to a bench inside?"

Jaeyun smiles at his father, taking him by his arm and leading him inside, stealing a glance as the sergeant gets closer to Sunoo and subtly takes his hand.

"What do you think about them?" He hears his father ask and offers him a smile at the question. He knows that, however much they need money, he will not let Jungwon marry someone who is not a good alpha.

"General Park seems quite fond of our Jungwonnie. And Jungwon seems to like him much", he says, smiling and patting his fathers arm as they enter the living room of lady Lee, some of her butlers cleaning around.

"And about the sergeant?" His father asks, "I am aware you have known him for some time", his father supplies and Jaeyun sits him down before asking for two glasses of water from the butler.

Jaeyun smiles lightly, "What might you think of him, father?"

Their father, a not so tall alpha with good build and dark black hair, always wearing suits and hats, puts his gloves down and his hat next to himself. Jaeyun sits on his other side, looking at him.

"He seems quite in love with our Sunoo", he looks away, "I am afraid that Sunoo will get hurt from his position in the army", he says and looks at Jaeyun now, Jaeyun's eyes softening.

"Sunghoon doesn't want to marry him because he's aware there won't be much good since Sunoo will be the omega of a mere sergeant. He strives for a higher position so he could have a home with Sunoo. He really only wants what is best for our Sunoo", he says and pats his fathers hand.

His father puts one hand over his cheek, "Jaeyun, my dear", he starts, eyes sad. Jaeyun sits upright now, looking at his father's eyes, "Am I making a mistake?"

Jaeyun is left sitting down without a word to say to his father.

Their father has always been a strong man. He nearly never cried in front of them or their mother. He believed that it would be best for them to give them everything. When Sunoo asked for lavishing gowns, their father would invest in them. When Jaeyun asked for more books and writing materials, their father bought it for him. When Jungwon would so much as mention how good the pudding from Mrs. May's shop is, he would order at least a dozen of them for him.

He is a good man and wants only what's best for his three omegas and his wife. Jaeyun has witnessed him get into deeper and deeper debt to the town as he lost his position as mayor and, to Jaeyun, it seemed impossible for him to lose his confidant smile. Weather he'd be asking for money from his peers or when he'd reassure Jaeyun about the books he wants but wouldn't get.

So, seeing him sad, it makes him halt before answering.

"Father", he says, calming voice in play, "Sergeant Park is so in love with Sunoo he'd rather put distance between them than risk losing Sunoo. Sunoo isn't stupid either. He knows that Sunghoon wouldn't hurt him", he says to him but his father only looks away again.

"And Jungwon?" He asks, "I quite like the general, but Jungwon is to wed him, give him children and a family. What if it isn't what he wants?" He puts his hand on his knee as he leans forward a bit, Jaeyun putting a hand on his back.

"Father", he smiles, "You asked Sunoo first, to land his hand in marriage to someone. However when he said no to you, you didn't budge further. Jungwon agreed, because he knows that it is needed and he knows that... It gives him hope", he says, looking out of the french door that lead to the garden. Seeing Jungwon smile lightly at the tall general and put a hand over his arm, it makes Jaeyun smile.

"What might you incline to, my darling?" His father asks and Jaeun averts his eyes to his father, looking at him already, wide eyes in play.

Jaeyun smiled, "He was never sure if someone will love him. After some time of writing with the general, Jungwon has grown to know that he is lovable. Do not worry father, your decision saved him", he says, smoothing a hand over his back.

-

Lady Lee was laying down in her bed, her hair cap puffing up and moving as she turned her head to Jaeyun who was knitting Sunoo a scarf.

Lady Lee didn't want to admit her condition was getting worse so Jaeyun didn't budge to tell her to rest more. It was early morning right now, Jaeyun getting up around 5 in the morning to make his way to her house before she woke.

He was sitting in the sofa that was positioned by her bed, a warm scarf thrown over his shoulders and a blanket over his legs.

Over the night, it grew cold. Wind was blowing outside and the whole night it was raining. The weather has worsened severely after general Park left the town.

Sunoo snickers and says that it is because of Jungwon's sad eyes from seeing his future alpha leave and Jaeyun can only smile and agree jokingly.

But this weather was doing no good to poor lady Lee who, like most people her age, was very prone to catching colds and flues.

"Jaeyun", she said right after the clock ticks seven in the morning.

Jaeyun lifts his eyes from his knitting experiment and looks at her, a smile already on his lips.

"Call my sister, please", she says and Jaeyun furrows his brows in wonder.

"Your sister? I was not aware you had one, lady Lee", he says and lady Lee nods.

"We are not fond of one another", she says and exhales, "However I have to tell her my goodbye", she says and Jaeyun sits up in panic.

"What might you mean, lady Lee?" He asks, putting the blanket and the knitting scarf aside to go to her bed and stand next to her.

"Don't play a fool, my Jaeyun", she regards him, "You must be well aware I am at my end. And I do not want to fight it. My time has come. I only want to say goodbye to my sister. Leave on good terms and apologize. She has been nothing but forgiving to me."

Jaeyun wants to furrow his brows, tell her that in a few days she will be better and gain strength, that he will help her get better.

But lady Lee only smiles, "Please, Jaeyunnie. My sister did not see me in years", she says and Jaeyun hesitates.

Lady Lee is strong and, at times, reminds him of his father. But, unlike his father, she will not put up a front when she feels off.

"Alright, lady Lee. I will be back in a few minutes", he tells her and gets up, walks to the door and takes one last look at her thin and frail body under the sheets and opens the doors. Maybe lady Lee really does not have much time left.

He gets the pen and paper and starts writing. He writes only the beginning, only "Dear" before he is left sitting there without a sound. He doesn't know who to address it to.

He stands up, takes the paper and the pen and walks to the kitchen. There, the oldest worker of lady Lee stands, tasting some kind of soup.

"Mrs. Jang", he calls to her and she turns around, taking a moment to get in the sight of the omega. She smiles lightly and gives him permission to sit down by the table in the kitchen. Jaeyun bows in thanks and sits down, putting the pen and paper on the table.

"You look lovely this morning, dear Jaeyun", she tells him, "Might I ask what you shall need from me?" She asks and Jaeyun smiles.

She talks to him with much respect. She was a firm believer that Jaeyun's father had to stay the mayor of their town.

Jaeyun, as such, treated her with same respect, making the woman warm up to him easily.

"Lady Lee... She wanted me to reach out to her sister. And I did not possess the knowledge she had one. So I came to you asking about her, so I could write her a letter", he says, lifting the pen and paper.

Mrs. Jang only sighs, her hair hat being pushed back by the back of her hand as she wipes her face clean of sweat.

"Ah yes. I feared that would come sooner rather than later. Lady Lee has not been feeling well and I hoped it would get better but it's not getting there, is it?"

Jaeyun furrowed his eyebrows, "How did you know, mrs. Jang?"

She shrugs, "Lady Lee said once that she might forgive her sister only on her death bed. And even than, she wouldn't be sure. But it looks like she is ready to forgive", she said.

Jaeyun only furrowed his eyebrows more, "Mrs. Jang, might I ask what is the matter between the Lee sisters?" He asks her and she only purses her lips.

"I do not think it's such a private matter since all of us who work for her know this", she says before meeting eyes with Jaeyun, "So I shall tell you why you have not heard of mrs. Lee, now Mrs. Nishimura, yet."

Jaeyun nods, a bit confused at the foreign surname.

"The sisters were fairly close, lady Lee an omega that was never really interested in alphas and her sister, an alpha, that changed two wives over her life. Her first wife, a lovely omega, gave birth to their alpha son and died while she gave birth. It put a mark into the alpha sister as she was very strict with raising her son. She felt as if her son was the reason her wife died."

She exhaled, sitting down by the table next to Jaeyun.

"Lady Lee loved her nephew dearly. He was a boy full of imagination and creativity. Lady Lee gave him a safe space to express himself, knowing her sister wouldn't be there for him. Then, when the boy turned 18, his mother introduced him to her new wife, mrs. Nishimura. I must say, she is one lovely lady. Lady Lee's nephew didn't like this, he felt thrown to the side since his mother blamed him for the death of her wife but now, it's like she hadn't existed. And then..."

She stops again and sighs one more time, Jaeyun putting a comforting hand over her back.

"Young mr. Lee ran away from home before his nineteenth birthday. Lady Lee never forgave her sister for the treatment of her nephew and she still is in grieve of not helping her nephew more. Her sister has apologized multiple times to her. Lady Lee doesn't trust her apologies but it turns out she does want to make peace before she leaves us."

Jaeyun hums, inhaling lightly before puffing out air from his lips and leaning into the chair.

"Thank you for that information, dear mrs. Jang", he told her and bowed to her lightly, "I shall write her the letter now. Might you know as well where she resides? Lady Lee's sister, I mean", he asks and mrs. Jang furrows her eyebrows.

"I am not sure. I shall ask around and let you know when I have found out. For now, write the letter", she smiles and gives him a pat as he stands up.

They bow to one another and mrs. Jang goes back to cooking the broth as Jaeyun makes his way to his writing table.

Dear mrs. Lee-Nishimura,

My name is Jaeyun and I am the nurse of your sister, lady Lee.

I am writing to you since lady Lee has not been feeling well. I took the courtesy of writing you this letter after she asked of me to bring you here, in her humble manor in our town of Gyokkgun.

She fears that her end may be near and wishes to see you as soon as possible.

We hope to welcome you soon.

Have a safe trip,
nurse Sim

The kindest mrs. Jang gave Jaeyun the address and he left for the post office soon after, leaving the letter there under 'fast delivery'.

He walked the cold streets back to the manor, not minding the wind blowing in his back as much.

His eyes wander over the towns people and he meets sergeant Park, standing tall by a jewelry shop, looking through the window.

The omega smiles and walks quietly to him, wanting to scare his future brother-in-law.

"Hello, Sunghoonie", he says and Sunghoon almost jumps from his spot.

He turns to the omega and scoffs, "Have you not got better things to do than scare innocent people in your town", he says and pulls his military coat down more.

Jaeyun just smiles, "I was passing and I saw you, couldn't not stop and greet you", he smiles and Sunghoon only now bows, Jaeyun following suit.

"So what brigs you here?" Sunghoon asks him.

"I was just returning to lady Lee's manor from the post office. Care to walk me back? Or have you got smarter business to attend?" He says winking at the jewelry shop.

Sunghoon only scoffs again, "I can walk you to the manor, Jaeyun, don't make a big deal out of it", he rolls his eyes and Jaeyun only smiles.

"So what were you doing looking through the window?" Jaeyun asks him and Sunghoon sighs.

He puts out his arm for Jaeyun to take, the omega's fingers grazing the creases of his uniform.

"Something my Sunoo might like", he says and exhales.

Jaeyun halts in his walk before Sunghoon tugs him to keep on walking, "Could you not make a fool out of me by standing in the middle of the road?"

Jaeyun only gasps, "Were you looking for rings?"

Sunghoon almost stops now but doesn't, only tugs at Jaeyun to walk faster, "No. Because for one, I still am not in a good position to wed your younger brother. And if I were to propose than it would be with my grandmother's ring", he says and Jaeyun gasps once more.

"You have thought of giving her ring to Sunoo already?" He asks and his eyes light up when Sunghoon's ears redden.

"I knew he would have since I first saw him, Jaeyun", he says and Jaeyun squeals in happiness for his brother.

"Oh, he shall be over the moon because of that! He is an omega of tradition when it comes to family!" He exclaims, his yellow hat almost falling from his head from jumping so much.

Sunghoon's whole face reddens at that and he looks away, "Must you be so loud?" He murmurs and Jaeyun only giggles at that.

Jaeyun has met Sunghoon's parents, his dear alpha mother and his wonderful omega father, multiple times. His mother is quite happy with him being in the army while his father makes sure he doesn't starve or die out from hunger.

Their family is of the middle of Gyokkgun society. His parents own a bakery and share goods to others. At first, Jaeyun's father didn't want him to spend time with an alpha from a middle layer family, but once he saw them play together, it was over for his father.

His father is aware that Sunoo will marry someone of not so high background. The whole town is. But when they see the two talk and exchange loving looks, they don't mind their difference in money as much.

Sunghoon's parents adore Sunoo more than anyone. They think he is of best manners and suits their eldest son the most.

They are aware that, if they are to agree to the marriage of their son and the lovely omega, they would need to give a certain amount of money to the omega's family.

They have long before agreed that, for their son's happiness, they will do anything and pay what is needed.

"Sunghoonie", Jaeyun starts, a few steps away from the gate of the manor. Sunghoon hums at him and looks down at him, Jaeyun smiling up at him, "Take good care of yourself and train hard. I believe that your goal is near", he says and sqeezes his arm before Sunghoon smiles.

"Thank you, Jaeyunnie", he says, "To you, the best of luck with lady Lee", he says and they bow to one another, Jaeyun entering the gate and Sunghoon going his marry way down the street.

As he enters the manor, he is met by the smell of fresh soup and chopped chives.

Time to get lady Lee down for lunch.

-

Jungwon and Sunoo have always been envious of Jaeyun.

Since both of them remember, Jaeyun has been their role model.

He was the prettiest omega they knew, and he made himself appear attractive by his actions. His gentleness. His kindness. His knowledge.

He was the perfect omega in so many ways. Loved and adored.

Gentle, quiet when needed and outspoken when needed. He stood up for himself but respected everyone around him.

He was their big brother, their elder omega that both took care of them and made sure they were safe.

Now, when they see him accompany lady Lee, they both sigh when they feel his dissatisfaction.

They aren't against his idea of being a governess. Jungwon, after so many rejections coming from Jaeyun to various young alphas, thought that that would be his path.

However seeing him have to accompany the old lady Lee into her soon coming death, they see that this wasn't what he thought work would bring him.

Sunoo was awake one of those days, at the tiny hours of the next morning, when Jaeyun came home, sighing as he went upstairs and sat on the chair in his room.

Sunoo followed him inside, "Jaeyun", he calls for his attention and Jaeyun turns to him hastily.

"Why are you awake at this hour?" He asks and goes to turn around to the mirror, taking off his hat.

Sunoo closed the door to his room, "We all decided to wait for you but mother was too tired so she went to sleep and father ordered Jungwon to go. Father and I stayed up since now, he wanted to make sure you came here safe, that is all", he says and Jaeyun sighs.

"Thank you, but you really should prioritize sleep over me. It is getting cold and sleeping wouldn't be as comfortable in the morning", he says, taking off his jewelry.

Sunoo sits by the foot of his bed, "We are worried about you, Jaeyun-hyung", he says and Jaeyun gently lays his earrings on the small vanity table before he turns to Sunoo, eyes soft.

They stare at one another for a minute before Jaeyun exhales, "No need to worry", he mumbles and goes to sit next to Sunoo.

Sunoo lifts a hand and caresses his cheek, "What shall you do after lady Lee's passing?" He asks, knowing that it was a touchy topic.

Lady Lee's sister still didn't arrive to their town, to lady Lee's manor. The poor old woman has been fighting for breath for the last three days non stop, coughing and drinking warm tea.

Jaeyun is feeling rather sad because of it. He isn't sure what he expected when he agreed to being her nurse. She clearly wanted someone to lead her to her end and she seemed content enough with Jaeyun.

But what will Jaeyun do when she's gone? Sure, he won't be a nurse and have a higher chance of becoming a governess, that's the bright side, but he won't be getting any money for his family, and right now that is dire.

He exhales and lays his back on the bed, "Sunoo, darling", he gets the younger's attention, "Tell me something nice that has happened to you today", he tells him and Sunoo smiles gently.

He lays down with Jaeyun and keeps quiet for a couple of seconds before, "I helped Jungwon write a letter to the general", he says, "And you know how he is usually so secretive about these letters."

Jaeyun turns to look at him, "Might I know what the letter was about?" Jaeyun asked and Sunoo only smiled again.

"He didn't know how to tell him that he misses him", Sunoo says and giggles gently, "Jungwon said it was the general's letter that reached out to him first. Writing about how he feels emptier without the knowledge that Jungwon is near. And Jungwon didn't know what to say", Sunoo finishes and there was a smile on his lips, fond look in his eyes.

Jaeyun also looked fond and cuddled to his brother, "What did you two write then?" He asks and Sunoo giggles even more.

"He was so shy to write that he misses him so I had to write that part. At first he wanted to crumple the letter but at the end we went to the post office to send it", he says and Jaeyun smiles.

"That is lovely, my Sunoo", Jaeyun says, getting up and going to put on his night gown.

Sunoo turns around in Jaeyun's bed and lightly exhales, "How about we go and invade Jungwon's sleeping quarters?" He asks and Jaeyun giggles when he walks around the paravane, nodding his head.

They make their way to his room, hand in hand, as they trudge around in the dark, Jaeyun holding a candle in his hand.

"And what might you two be doing?" They hear a voice and both jump up, turning around to face their father, still in his day clothes.

Sunoo smiles, "We are off to Jungwonnie's room. Is that alright, father?" He asks and their father chuckles and nods.

They are about to run to the room when their father halts them, "Jaeyun, might I ask of you to stay for a second?" He asks and Jaeyun only nods, gives the candle to Sunoo and heads to his father.

His father smiles fondly at him, "How are you feeling? I have not seen you the last few days", he says and it makes Jaeyun smile at the care.

"Lady Lee isn't feeling well. We are expecting her sister to arrive soon. This month's money will arrive soon, do not worry, father", he tells him and his father sighs.

Jaeyun looks at his sad eyes once again and he is reminded of his father's worries for him and his brother's.

His father speaks up, "I am not sure for how long will we be able to pay for our butlers. For the next two months we will be able to pay, but after that... I doubt it", he says and Jaeyun feels sad as well now.

He hugs his father, "It will all work out. Trust in it", he says and they part there, Jaeyun going to the end of the hall where he can smell the burn of the candle and entering the room, his two brother's already asleep.

Sleep envelops him soon after as well, making his eyes close and his heart beat steadier.

-

They all stood outside the manor on the steps to the main gate, Jaeyun between mrs. Jang and the gardener.

"Once you see lady Lee's sister", mrs. Jang started, "You'll see who got the good looks in the family", she says.

The gardener stiffled a laugh, "Alas, she is of evil nature, unlike our good lady Lee", he says and Jaeyun can't help but furrow his eyebrows. He hadn't met the woman so he is not sure what to expect of her.

In that moment he hears the galop of horses from a carriage. The next thing he sees is a modest sized carriage with an alpha commanding the horses to still in front of the staff of lady Lee's house.

He sees a butler exit the carriage and open the door wider, putting his hand out next. There is a dark green gloved hand that meets with the white of the butler's glove, after it stepping out a woman, tall and pale, in a lavish green dress and green hat.

She steps out and turns to the carriage, her hands beckoning someone to come out.

A young boy makes his way out and jumps into the lady's arms, the lady smiling gently and setting him down.

Jaeyun furrows his eyebrows. This woman looks the part of lady Lee's sister. Her face is of the same shape and her figure resembles her, but her tall statue and the fact that she was an omega do not fit in. 

He would have wondered some more if it wasn't for the woman in a long dark green coat stepping out, her pants and boots getting a bit dirty from the mud she stepped into.

Now, Jaeyun sees what lady Lee's sister looks like.

Taller than mrs. Nishimura (he assumes it's her from the way they look at each other), she stands there and evaluates the staff of lady Lee's house.

She than looks at the house and it's quiet for some moments. Jaeyun takes that time to look over their clothing.

Lady Lee's sister is wearing a white blouse under the green coat, the blouse looking more expensive than whatever Jaeyun had ever worn, if he is to be honest. Her omega's dress compliments the coat greatly, her short sleeves revealing the right amount of arm before they are hidden under the gloves.

One of her hands hold the small hand of a shy boy that is hiding behind her dress in his suit that was clearly tailored to him a few years back since it looks a tad bit too small for his body.

"Who is the Jaeyun that wrote to me?" He is startled by the voice of the woman that is standing in front of them, tall and proud. Mrs. Jang and the gardener make space for him as Jaeyun gently looks around.

He clears his throat, "I am, mrs. Lee-Nishimura", he says and bows, the rest of the staff following suit.

Lady Lee's sister lifts a well polished brow at him and he, for once, feels as if she will scrutinize him to bits.

"Lead me and my family to her. She asked for us and we are here", she says and Jaeyun is left to only listen to her. He bows one more time and tells them to follow him.

He walks the house with grace but not with a relaxed stance. He is aware this is not his house and he should abide that. Lady Lee's sister should at least see that.

As they arrive to her room, Jaeyun knocks and hears a faint voice tell him to come in.

"Lady Lee", Jaeyun starts and opens the door wider, "Your sister and her family are here", he says and the three of them enter after Jaeyun into the room of the old lady.

Lady Lee sits up and Jaeyun rushes to help her, puts another pillow behind her back as she relaxes again and thanks him with a smile, "Thank you, my Jaeyun", she says.

She averts her eyes at the family in front of her, "I wish to speak to you alone, Seojin", she says to her sister, "Jaeyun would you be so kind as to escort mrs. Nishimura and her son out of the room for now. I will call you when needed", she says and Jaeyun nods.

Lady Lee's sister looks stern as she stares at her, before looking back at her wife and son. She than looks over to Jaeyun and nods to him. He takes it as a sign to lead them out.

He closes the door behind himself and smiles at the two, "I do not think I have introduced myself fully yet", mrs. Nishimura tells him, "I am Saoko Nishimura, Seojin's wife and omega. The mother of our little Riki", she tells him, a kind smile on her face.

Jaeyun instantly likes her. He bows, his dark blue dress pooling around his feet before he straightens up and says, "My name is Jaeyun. I am lady Lee's nurse", he says and the other omega smiles.

She looks down and nudges her son, Riki, to look at Jaeyun but the little boy did not budge. He only hid further in his mother's skirt.

Jaeyun only smiled and kneeled down, the skirt of his dress spreading out even more. His long, at the end wide, sleeves ruffled as Jaeyun's hands waved to the boy that peeked at him.

"Hello, young man", he says with a wide smile that only gets bigger when the boy blushes lightly. Jaeyun gets a bit closer, "My name is Jaeyun. What is your name?" He asks him and Riki seems to stop and think.

He looks up at his mother that is smiling fondly at him and Jaeyun interacting. She nudges him with her hand and Riki stands a bit taller as he moves from his mother's skirt.

He bows at Jaeyun and Jaeyun can only giggle at the cuteness as the boy stumbles a bit, "My name is Riki."

He bites his lip and Jaeyun thinks for a moment. He eyes the boy a bit and asks him, "And how old might you be, Riki? You look quite mature", he says and it makes him smile shily.

"I will be turning six next month. Mother tells me that I shall get my own dog then", he says and smiles, big and wide, all teeth showing. His mother laughs lightly.

Jaeyun goes to stand up and ask Riki one more question when the door of lady Lee's room opens, "Saoko", the omega in question looks to the door and faces her alpha wife, standing tall and broad. Saoko Nishimura goes to take her son's hand but the alpha stops her, "Leave Riki."

She hesitates, about to voice out her concern. She looks down at Riki and than at Jaeyun.

Jaeyun gets the signal and bows, "Riki", he whispers and outstretches his arm and opens his hand, "Let's go find lollies", he smiles and the boy shines from happiness.

He looks at his mother that nods at him and he soon takes Jaeyun's hand and follows him.

The two adults are heard conversing and the door closes loudly while the small boy walks with Jaeyun down the stairs.

When Jaeyun stands on the ground floor of the manor and extends his arms to catch Riki who jumps into his arms, he spins them while the boy giggles happily.

"Come on", Jaeyun sets him down, "I think there were some in the tea room", he says and the little boy cheers. Jaeyun smiles wide.

They make their way to the tea room where a maid and a butler talk quietly. He sees them and apologizes for interrupting.

The two bow down shily as well, apologizing as well and leaving the room hurriedly. Jaeyun smiles at Riki and sits him down as he goes to a bowl on the shelf and sees a couple of sweets lady Lee likes to have around.

When he sets the bowl on the tea table in front of the sofa he goes to sit down next to Riki. He sees his coat buttons ready to pop and his sleeves tightly hugging his arm.

Jaeyun hides his smile as best as he can and asks, "Maybe you'd want to take your coat off, young Sir Nishimura?"

Riki giggles and nods happily as Jaeyun unbuttons the two buttons and slides the coat off his arms. He puts it on the armrest of the sofa and goes to turn around and take the bowl into his lap.

When he does so, Riki sits on his knees and goes to look in the bowl. His eyes shine as he sees the small wrapped pieces of sugar. He squeals in glee as he goes to take one.

"Be careful", Jaeyun tells him, "You mustn't take more than a few", he says and Riki nods, unwrapping one piece of candy and putting it into his mouth.

Jaeyun smiles as the boy's eyes shine so bright.

"You must try one! They are outstandingly delicious!" The boy exclaims and Jaeyun heartily laughs now. This boy looks as if sweets were his saving grace.

Jaeyun lets him eat two more sweets and takes the bowl away. The boy whines but Jaeyun only shakes his head, "Your parents will be angry at me if I give you more."

And it goes like that, Riki munches and chews on the sweet as Jaeyun smooths his hair a couple of times.

When he's done it gets quiet for a second before Riki looks at him, "Have you got an alpha?" He asks rather boldly, "You are very pretty", he adds as an afterthought and Jaeyun is left smiling very wide.

"I do not, young Sir Riki", he smiles, "And you? You are quite the looker as well", he says and winks at him, Riki blushing.

He doesn't say anything more about the topic and looks away, more blush forming on his cheeks and ears.

He turns to him then again and bites his lip, "My hyung told me if I met a pretty omega I should compliment them", he says and Jaeyun's face morphs into one of confusion.

"Your hyung?" He asks and the boy nods.

"My older brother", he says and Jaeyun furrows his brows even more? Didn't mrs. Jang say that they had only this son? Mrs. Nishimura and mrs. Lee-Nishimura had only one son.

"Well", he doesn't know how to ask him this. He doesn't even know how to approach that subject. Should he even ask?

"Hyung comes to my room at night and tells me stories about himself and about a pretty omega he once met. He also tells me not to tell my mothers because they will get angry."

Riki is so brutally honest with him it confuses him for a second. How didn't he tell that to his parents but he openly shared it with him? Maybe it's because he found someone he could say that to. He isn't sure.

In that moment, mrs. Nishimura enters the room and smiles, "Riki dear, have you been good?"

Riki nods, "Yes! I got sweet lollies as well!" He exclaims and his mother laughs, patting his back.

"Jaeyun-shii", Jaeyun lifts his head up at the voice of the omega in the green dress, "Lady Lee wants you in her room", she smiles and bows to him, Jaeyun standing up and doing the same.

He walks up the stairs and catches a voice of a woman, "Who does she possibly think she is? Some kind of witch to put a spell on us? Utter foolery and indescribable attitude", she says and from only that, Jaeyun knows that lady Lee and her sister didn't forgive each other that easily.

He gets in front of the room and sees the woman pacing. He bows to her and she stills, looking at him. She looks at his dress and his hair before speaking up, "You do not dress as a regular town omega", she tells him.

Jaeyun smiles gently, "My father was the first mayor of this town", he says and bows once again, going to enter lady Lee's room.

"And as his omega son you have to work?" The alpha woman asks him and Jaeyun is forced to still at the door handle.

He clears his throat as he turns around, a gentle smile on his face still standing there, "It has been my choice to work for lady Lee. She has been kind enough and offered me this job", he says and turns around, opening the door and entering lady Lee's room, closing the door soon after, shutting their conversation there.

Lady Lee lays on the pillows Jaeyun had set under her head as she looks at him by the door. She sighs, "My Jaeyun", she sighs.

Jaeyun is by her side in a second, taking her hand and sitting next to her.

"When I die", Jaeyun goes to tell her that it won't be soon but she only puts up a hand to stop him from saying anything, "I want you to be at the reading of my will", she tells him and he halts.

She only nods and smiles at his reaction, "Of course you will be getting a part of my money, you served me good", she smiles, "But also be there so that my sister doesn't take anything away from both of my nephews", she seems more serious when she says it and Jaeyun can only nod.

She sighs and relaxes into the pillow. Jaeyun sees how tired she is from fighting to live.

She turns to him again, "As I have talked to my sister now, I will stop fighting death as much. So you won't be needing to wake up as early and come here every morning. I wish your family the best", she says and smiles at Jaeyun's sad face, "And you shouldn't be sad. There is a life in front of you."

It's quiet for a second, Jaeyun only staring at her as she breaths calmly with her eyes closed.

"Now", she tells Jaeyun, "bring me that omega and her son here. I at least want to meet my second nephew."

-

Both of his brothers and his parents, and even the staff at their house, has told him that black doesn't suit him.

He looks amazing in yellows, greens, blues and pinks. Lavish reds and pretty purples. White suits him as well, makes him look radiant. However black makes him stand out, not in the best way.

His skin looks paler than it actually is, his face looks sadder and his personality just isn't shown well in the colour.

However, today he had to put that destined colour on himself.

He had to go to his mother's closet and take the black dress she wore on her mother's funeral.

He had to sow a shall to go with it since his mother did not own one, as well as borrow a hat from mrs. Jang.

He put the dress on himself, feeling the warm material hug his body. His gloves were not laced, like the rest he owned, but pure dark satin. His shoes were not his usual working ones but a pair he wore to fancier outings.

The shall was draped over his back and shoulders, slipping a bit to be held in the crook of his elbows.

He took the hat that mrs. Jang gave him and sighed. It had a black veil over it and served as a cover up of a crying face.

He sighed while looking at the mirror. He always imagined a veil over his head, white and beautiful, waiting to be uncovered by him future alpha. Instead of that he is on his way to pay respect to the dead.

To his late employer, lady Lee. To the woman that, even though he was the one having to take care of her, took care of him. She provided warm food and gave money for doing basic tasks for her.

He felt as if the woman and all her staff liked him, at least a decent amount much for them to pity him when their own employer died.

None of these people had a job now. They were unemployed and without money. Some of them were in much worse places than Jaeyun and his family, swimming in thousands and thousands of debt.

He sighed again. He had no job now and, after today, will be on the hunt for one that includes maybe children. If not, he will except anything.

He stands up and goes down the stairs in their home, his mother and Sunoo waiting downstairs.

They both hug him, his mother patting his shoulder and whispering, "Don't be sad for long", she smiles kindly after it and Jaeyun bows his head before opening the gate of their home and walking out, one of their butlers bowing to him and leading him to the cemetery.

The two walked in silence, Jaeyun full of thoughts.

"Shall I accompany you through the whole funeral and the will reading?" The butler asks and the omega looks up.

He was a kind man in his late fifties. He served his family for some time and his family is fond of him.

"No need", Jaeyun tells him, "Lead me to the... The church, yes", he says as he sees more and more people gather in front of the building, all clad in black.

Churches were such a place of happiness for Jaeyun. They always held security and safety in them. He always felt as if he would be walking this same road but with his father by his side, with a white vail over his face, seeing happy faces and people that... didn't wear black.

He wasn't used to death. It was something that wasn't spoken of much, considered a bad topic of conversation. But here, lady Lee's death is their only reason to gather.

Most of the people there are the people that worked for her. He sees lady Lee's sister and her family and a few of their people. He also spots the few ladies who were lady Lee's friends here.

He gets to the church and his butler bids him goodbye and walks away, leaving Jaeyun to tend to himself.

He looks around and tries to spot a familiar face of mrs. Jang. He does see her and she smiles sorrowfully at him, but he is stopped by a small hand meeting his.

Before he even looks down he hears a high voice whisper-shout 'Riki!' into the calm air of this cold morning.

When he looks down, it really is the small boy who looks ecstatic to see him, "Hello, young Sir", Jaeyun tells him and smiles kindly at his mother, assuring her he doesn't mind.

Riki giggles and waves up at him. Jaeyun waves back.

It would've lasted longer if it wasn't for Riki looking to their left and shouting, "Hyung!" Before running away.

Jaeyun whips his head at where Riki is running to.

There stands a boy, a man, an alpha, that Jaeyun can recognize well enough.

He had seen this face around 7 years ago, at his first ball. He has seen this face in his dreams. In his imaginations of his wedding. He has seen this face, slightly younger, through the past seven years repeatedly, weekly, daily.

He was the boy, now the man, that made Jaeyun an unmarried omega, more or less so.

-

Chapter Text

When an omega gets married to an alpha, their last name is replaced with the alpha's. It has been like that since the beginning of time.

Jaeyun was aware that his family name will not exist in the future. At least not from their branch of the family, since all three of them were omegas.

Their omega mother was born of an omega Yang and an alpha Kim, thus making her and her brother both Kims.

Then, she married their father and became a Sim.

Her brother, also an omega, didn't get to keep his surname either.

Their father had three sisters, two older and one younger. The eldest sister is an omega, the rest are alphas. Meaning that the Sim surname spread quite far. His cousins were mainly alphas, so the surname will go on, just not from the three of them.

When Jaeyun was born, his parents decided it would be a pretty good name: Sim Jaeyun.

When their mother was pregnant the second time, they thought about the name the most. At the end, they named him Sim Sunoo after their mother's brother who, God be with him, died in labour.

When it was their third time becoming parents, they didn't think much of the name. They decided that when they see their third child that they will decide on the name.

Jungwon was born prematurely, a month and a half before he had to be born, making him an extremely weak child. When his parents were taking care of their third child, their governess, Mrs. Sooyoung, came into play.

After 3 months of hospital beds and healing, the two came home at last, the two brothers seeing their younger sibling for the first time. Mrs. Soonyoung played a huge role for those few months, feeding and caring for the two small omegas as best as she could. Around that time, she got especially close to Jaeyun, and most probably started favouring him then.

When Jaeyun asked what his name was, the parents both shrugged, "What would you name him?" Their mother asked and Jaeyun smiled big, eyes shinning from excitement at being given such an important task.

He felt proud of giving him the name Jungwon. It fit him and his little face and angled, big eyes. Made him who he is.

Mrs. Jang told Jaeyun this once, a few nights before lady Lee's passing.

"Lady Lee and her sister were born Lees. Lady Lee's sister than married an omega, also a Lee, and their son's last name was than, naturally, Lee. When the alpha sister met mrs. Nishimura, she decided to keep her surname but also add the omega's. At the beginning they were both Lees, but lady Lee's sister did not want another child with the last name Lee. She didn't want to repeat the mistake."

Jaeyun furrowed his eyebrows, "That's absurd", he tells her.

Mrs. Jang smiles, "Of course it is. She, lady Lee's alpha sister that is, made a whole story about why the child, Riki, shouldn't be a Lee. But what is under that story about the cursed Lee children and whatnot, is that she didn't want her second child to be of much relations with her sister. The very liberal lady Lee. She often claimed lady Lee farther ruined her first son. In reality, she gave him freedom which every child needs."

In conclusion, Riki holds his omega mother's last name because his alpha mother is afraid that lady Lee would have influenced him too much. As she has the elder son of mrs. Lee-Nishimura, lady Lee's older nephew.

However, seeing that nephew now, seeing that tall alpha that, years ago, made him yearn for him, it made him quiver to think he had done anything wrong.

He is looking at the alpha kneeling down to meet eyes with his brother, both smiling greatly, little Riki grabbing the alpha by the hand.

Lady Lee supported him, her older nephew, greatly, or so he knows of. And his own mother did not. His face morphs into sadness for the alpha as he thinks of how the man must've survived.

Jaeyun inspects his features. He seems regal, sharper than he remembers him. Like life got it's hands on him and shook him every now and then, provoking him for how he lives. Jaeyun's mind races. If he ran away from home, he must have been homeless for at least a period of time, no?

Jaeyun cannot imagine not having his own room, his own space and peace. 

"Heeseung", the voice of mrs. Lee-Nishimura has never sounded as cold as it is sounding now, so sudden it startles Jaeyun from looking at the alpha some more, "What might you be doing with Riki?"

The alpha, Heeseung, his name was Heeseung, stops smiling at the boy and looks at the two adults, the little boy's omega mother looking away while the alpha stares at them.

"At my aunt's funeral, you ask?" He asks, sarcastic. Jaeyun looks down at the little boy who is still holding onto the alpha's hand, the man standing up now to be at eye level with his mother.

Jaeyun meets eyes with mrs. Nishimura that quickly looks at Riki with furrowed, worried brows, and Jaeyun gets it right away, "Come with me, young Sir", Jaeyun says as he comes closer to Riki and offers him a hand.

Riki looks at Heeseung and, after a moment, he looks at the man as well. Their eyes meet, Jaeyun still holding out his hand for Riki, and he isn't sure should he run and hide somewhere or should he go to him and hug him. He does neither, to his own very luck. Riki takes his hand not even a second after their eyes meet.

The man's eyes seemed so threatening to his mother but turned softer towards Jaeyun. It made his stomach flip internally. Could he still remember Jaeyun?

"Are you Riki's governess? I was not aware he had one", the alpha says and, for a brief second, spares a glance at his mother. His mother is watching him, eyes glued to his face, a not so pleased expression on his face.

Jaeyun first hesitates to say anything, but he should clear everything up now, "No, Sir. I was lady Lee's nurse for the past few months or so", he says and bows out of respect.

Riki watches them with big eyes but doesn't say anything, one hand in Jaeyun's the other in Heeseung's.

Heeseung seems to straighten at that bit of information, "So you are the well renown Sim Jaeyun? Aunt liked you plenty", he says and Jaeyun is taken aback by his comment.

Before he could ask more questions about the fact that the woman wrote about him, mentioned him to her nephew, the same alpha that made him feel fluttering in his chest, mrs. Lee-Nishimura coughs.

"Lee Heeseung", she says and the alpha is back to being stone cold.

He looks at Jaeyun and than at Riki. He smiles at Riki and crouches down, "Be good, no?", he says and the boy immediately smiles and gently raises a hand to his half-brother's face. Heeseung seems to be familiar with that gesture as he just smiles and let's the boy do what he wants.

Heeseung stands up and pulls his jacket down before he walks to his mother and her wife, the omega mother trying to smile as best as she could at the alpha that is coming their way. It dawns on Jaeyun only now that lady Lee's elder nephew isn't just on bad terms with his mother but also with her wife.

"What is a governess?" The boy that was holding Jaeyun's hand asks and startles Jaeyun out of his thought.

Jaeyun smiles down at him as they go and walk away from the scene and closer to the church, "That's an omega lady that teaches you about all sorts of things", he tells the boy.

The boy opens his mouth, "Mommy does that. Is she my governess?" He asks and looks up at Jaeyun.

Jaeyun giggles lightly, "No silly. She's your mommy. An omega that makes sure you know about the past and the present. Teaches you how to become a better person. Makes sure you know all sorts of skills and languages."

The little boy thinks more. It's quiet for that minute and Jaeyun spares a glance at the boy's family.

The alpha mother looks mad and upset and Jaeyun is sure that if he came closer he would be able to smell her distress harshly. He can also see it in her wife, an omega that is shrinking down in size by the second as her wife proceeds to let out those pheromones.

The alpha son stands tall. He's calm and collected, the opposite of his mother. He talks slow but Jaeyun can see from here that they have venom all over their words. Jaeyun is glad he took Riki to the side so he doesn't have to hear the conversation.

His eyes stay on the alpha. He grew even more handsome than he remembered him all those years ago. He likes the new sharpness in his features. His shoulders were even broader, face even more sculpted. He looked so properly mature it made Jaeyun blush, even though the man wasn't standing near him or even looking at him.

"I don't think I have a governess", Jaeyun is startled out of his thoughts for the nth time by the boy next to him that spoke up, looking down at him and taking in a breath before looking to the church. Some people already started entering it.

"At one point you might", he said, "However it is not so necessary for alphas as it is for omegas", he says and smiles gently down at him.

The boy furrows his brows, "Have you had a governess when you were younger?" He asks and Jaeyun quickly takes a glance at mrs. Nishimura, now walking their way.

"Of course", he says and smiles, "Your mother is coming for you, go to her", he giggles as the boy whips his head that way and rushes to his mother.

The boy jumps into his mother's arms and envelops her in a giggly hug. Jaeyun averts his eyes from the personal scene. His eyes, naturally so, end up on the alpha duo that looks like they're subtly fighting.

The mother's back is hunched, she looks like she wants to show dominance and authority. Her son though, looks calm as ever, back straight and face still. He doesn't look like he wants to show dominance but his stance makes him show it.

Amidst all this Jaeyun's mind supplies him with a playful, young alpha that makes him smile at his jokes. That makes him smile at his playful remarks and makes him blush at his flirty jabs. What has this world done to him? Was it too harsh on him? Jaeyun is eager to find out, but is unsure if he ever will.

-

The part of the funeral that was held in the church was beautiful.

There was a choir singing and there were people throwing flowers near her grave. It looked like lady Lee was loved. And that was simply astonishing to Jaeyun - the love people show, most of them only at a funeral.

He is aware of his tears. He is aware of the tears falling down most of the guests faces. He is aware that all of them have a heavy heart, now that lady Lee has left them.

His seat next to mrs. Jang is located in the second row, right behind the family. He can clearly see that lady Lee's sister does not look sad nor happy. She looks calm now, but not at peace. Her mind is still full. But now that her older son is seated three seats away from her, next to Riki, she seems calmer.

Jaeyun is seated right behind Riki, so he gets to see mrs. Lee-Nishimura's face perfectly good. She looks like the funeral of her sister was just another event she had to attend to. It made Jaeyun look at her with slightly furrowed eyebrows, before mrs. Jang put a warm palm over his back and calmed him down, her fingers bringing the shall over his shoulders up. He doesn't want to have his mind occupied by the heartless.

Once that part of the funeral has finishes, they all stood up to go to the graveyard.

It was tradition that omegas and children go before the casket and alphas after it. So Jaeyun made his way out with mrs. Jang, looking back at mrs. Nishimura and her son following closely behind them.

"Mommy, why do we get to go before mom, hyung and aunt?" Riki asks mrs. Nishimura.

Riki's mother shushes him before smoothing his bangs to the side, "It's tradition, darling", she tells him and picks him up so they don't make people wait behind them.

Riki doesn't seem satisfied because he taps onto Jaeyun's shoulder, the omega walking right in front of them with mrs. Jang.

"Why is it tradition that we go first?" Riki asks and Jaeyun smiles lightly. He excuses himself to mrs. Jang and goes to walk next to the two, mrs. Jang giving him a gentle smile and patting his arm before he left her briefly.

He lightly talks, "It is said that from the casket there are released bad spirits and omens, spirits of the dead and of the sick. That's why the alphas, who are considered physically stronger, walk behind it. With that also, quite complimentary, goes that omegas and children are pure and give way to the casket to walk it's last route in purity."

He finishes and even mrs. Nishimura looks impressed by his explanation, Riki gaping up at him. He bows to the both and bids goodbye shortly after going to walk in front of them, next to mrs. Jang.

-

Once they finally bid their final goodbyes to lady Lee, the staff and the town folks go their marry way home. Jaeyun, mrs. Jang and one more gentleman along with the family members stay and go into carriages to the lawyer's office for the reading of the will.

In one carriage go Riki and his parents and in the other are Jaeyun, mrs. Jang, the unknown gentleman and, of course, Lee Heeseung.

He was seated next to mrs. Jang and opposite the gentleman, so his staring at the young alpha wouldn't be as obvious. He settled on looking out the window and listening to the light conversation.

"Heeseung", mrs. Jang said, "You have grown quite a lot since the last time we have seen you", she says and smiles gently, eyes kind and gentle.

Jaeyun hears a faint chuckle and he almost whips his head in the direction of the voice, "I have been in quite a lot of places since we have last seen each other as well. Although, I must be honest, everywhere I went to I tried various foods, and your beef soup is still the best of them all."

It's a kind compliment that gets mrs. Jang laughing and smiling lightly as the alpha only smiles at her.

Jaeyun tunes them out once they exit the big graveyard, looking out at the people in the parks. They wore colorful dresses and suits, walking around and talking, smiling brightly, laughing as the cold of the morning grew warmer at the shy rays of Sun that peaked through the clouds. It's a nice look at their town of Gyokkgun, where people could be happy and content. He wished he felt like that today, not like a stone has been laying over his chest since his lady's passing.

"I don't believe we have met yet", Jaeyun is whipped away from his thoughts by the voice of the gentleman in front of him.

Jaeyun hastily meets his eyes and smiles gently. The man's eyes lock with his and Jaeyun is sure that he is talking to him. He spares a glance at the other two that were both looking at him. His heart speeds at the thought of Lee Heeseung watching him.

Jaeyun's eyes move back to the man in front of him. An alpha. He looked tall and lean, stance confidant and sly, even at the funeral where you should be reserved and quiet.

"Sim Jaeyun, Sir", he got his hand out and the alpha took it and leaned down to kiss his gloved hand. He sees Lee Heeseung look away from the corner of his eye, "I was the nurse of lady Lee these past few months."

The gentleman hums and bows his head, tipping his hat forward slightly as a greeting, "I'm Cho Yeobin", the man said and the omega bowed, "When she was young, lady Lee was my governess."

-

Little was known of this man.

Jaeyun never heard of him and never knew about him.

However, as this man says, lady Lee, once simply mrs. Lee, was the governess to the Cho family.

The Cho family had one son: Yeobin, the man that rode the carriage with Jaeyun. He had a younger sister, Iseul. Iseul has been sick for the past few years, so she cannot attend lady Lee's funeral.

That all is what he finds out as Heeseung talks to mrs. Jang and, by extension, him as they walk the short walk to the lawyers office. Heeseung turns his way a couple of times while he talks, however their eyes have not met one of those times.

Heeseung has known the siblings since he was little, since his aunt used to care for him and the Cho's together regularly.

That much information he gets before they are all seated in the room with lady Lee's lawyer. An alpha man, if Jaeyun were to guess he'd say he was a couple of years younger than his father.

"Good day everyone", the lawyer starts, "My condolences to you all. My name is Yoo Jinyoung and I was the lawyer of lady Lee. She gave me her will which we will be reading aloud right now."

They got settled in, the omegas sitting down and the alphas standing up. Jaeyun was seated between mrs. Jang and mrs. Nishimura, making him sit right in front of the lawyer.

The man cleared his throat and starts reading the letter: "If you are hearing this, that means there is no longer me in this world. I am not sad about it, I know some of you aren't either", a cough from her sister, "However, I have got to spend my money's worth somehow, don't I?"

Yoo Jinyoung makes a pause before continuing: "I shall start with my oldest friend, mrs. Jang. You have served me greatly through the past and it is my place to make sure you feel my appreciation. I am giving you the cutlery and pans, everything you use to cook from the kitchen. I, as well, am giving you 300 pounds. I am aware it isn't much, however I know the struggles your daughter has in going to a good school. Those are for her."

The stop makes it dramatic, Jaeyun must admit. Mrs. Jang smiles kindly and bows her head down.

"To my sister", the lawyer starts again, "She has not been my best companion and has not given me much of her time to even reason with her. I hereby say that it is best for you, my darling sister, to take my piano, since you like music and melodies so much."

Jaeyun's lips quirk at the sound of mrs. Jang's chuckle and Heeseung's sly laugh covered in a cough. Lady Lee was quite a jokester.

"To Cho Yeobin and Cho Iseul", the lawyer begins once again, "I have to give something good. You both were the good when it was bad for me. To Cho Yeobin I gift one of my good dogs and 500 pounds, so you can find it good. To Cho Iseul, half my dresses and all my jewelry. I remember how much you liked them."

Silence again before the lawyer clears his throat, "To my loveliest nephew, Heeseung, the artist. I leave to you my house and my staff. They have much to give and no one to give it to. I believe you know what to do with them."

Now, the pause was necessary. The sister mutters a 'What' that sounded as angry as it gets and mrs. Jang gasped quietly as she turned to look at the alpha who stood behind her.

Jaeyun's heart skips a beat. For some reason it makes him indescribably happy that good happened to the alpha. He remembers that lady Lee told him he should make sure her nephew gets what she has given him. However he doesn't think she remembers Heeseung as such, calm and commanding. Jaeyun believes he will not have problems in getting what is his.

"And lastly to my dearest Jaeyunnie", the lawyer read and Jaeyun's back straightens.

He was aware he was getting something. Lady Lee told him to be there so he makes sure everything goes to everyone she wanted to, and she also mentioned some money to him. However he wasn't sure if that was just her way of coaxing him here or was it the real truth.

"The other half of my dresses. I have grown worried seeing you in so many working clothes. You should dress nicer while outside. I also give you my other dog, Layla. I know you played a lot with her and she served you joy. I am also aware of your family's situation. I talked to sergeant Park and I wanted to save the young lovebirds from possible war and blood loss. I might not have much money but I have some. So whatever is left of my money is yours."

There were tears in his eyes again. He couldn't believe it. He could not believe it. Lady Lee, the kind woman that always talked to him gently and asked for things in the lightest way possible. She practically saved Jaeyun and his family. He really could not believe it. From the kindness of his heart, he wishes to thank her now, however impossible that may be.

His tears fell down his face rapidly as mrs. Jang wiped them clean from his face and under the black veil. Jaeyun's eyes opened for a second and were greeted by a hand giving him a white handkerchief. He took it without thinking and covered his eyes with it, the scent of rosemary taking over his senses and calming him down momentarily.

The will was read. Jaeyun got more than enough things from lady Lee and he couldn't contain himself from crying at least three more times. How could a person be as good as her?

Mrs. Jang was there next to him before Jaeyun excused himself to go outside for a moment to get himself together.

He was so thankful to this woman. She has just saved him and his family a few more months. She gave sergeant Park and Sunoo time. She gave Jaeyun a chance to properly look for a job. She gave chance to their family. He could not believe it, he was over the moon.

He wiped his face one more time with the handkerchief before exhaling. He straightened the white cloth over the railing in front of him so he could fold it nicely. His eyes wondered to the edge of the handkerchief where there were two initials: C and Y.

Cho Yeobin.

The alpha seemed quite nice to him and it made him blush slightly at his kindness.

"Are you alright, nurse Sim?" A voice asked and the man he was just thinking about came into his field of vision.

Jaeyun lightly laughed and sniffed before nodding his head, "I just cannot believe lady Lee's kindness", he says as he folded the handkerchief nicely.

"Lady Lee is like that", Yeobin says, "She recognizes good and than gives it a prize. She knows that is the only way to spread kindness. She taught my sister and I well and we practice that till this day."

It is quiet for a second, "Thank you for the handkerchief", Jaeyun motions towards it, "I shall wash it before giving it back to you. It has become dirty", he says and puts it in his other palm, closing it.

"No worries", Yeobin says, "Keep it."

Jaeyun blushes. He isn't aware from where Cho Yeobin is, but in Jaeyun's region it is considered flirting if an alpha gives something of his to the omega. Most popular gifts would be gloves in the cold times, scarfs and handkerchiefs.

"Ah", Jaeyun starts, "You are too kind, Sir", he says, a light blush still present on his cheeks.

They look at each other. Cho Yeobin has kind eyes. They are soft and gentle and, by the eyes alone, Jaeyun would say he was an omega. Their eyes meet and Jaeyun has to stop and look away to breath, his cheeks burning again.

His eyes land on the garden in front of them, vast and big, flowers and plants alike growing around. He can still feel Yeobin's eyes on him.

The door opens and they both look at it. There stood the other young alpha, giving them a calm, monotone look, "Yeobin and nurse Sim", he says, lightly bowing to them, the other two returning it, "We are all ready to leave if you are."

Yeobin nods and looks from Heeseung to Jaeyun. Jaeyun's eyes are fixated on Heeseung as the latter looks back at him now as well. They stare at one another before Jaeyun nods lightly and clears his throat, his palm with the handkerchief going to cover his mouth.

Heeseung's eyes stay on the piece of fabric for a few seconds before he averts them elsewhere and walks inside, leaving the door open.

Mrs. Jang is already inside the carriage, Heeseung sitting in front of her. Cho Yeobin gets his hand out and helps Jaeyun climb inside, the latter sitting next to mrs. Jang that smiles at him.

Their carriage starts moving before mrs. Jang speaks up, "Jaeyun, dear, I have talked to the driver and we agreed to leave you at your house first, than leave Sir Cho at the train station before leaving the two of us at lady Lee's house. Is that alright?" She asks and Jaeyun bows lightly as to say thanks.

-

"Oh my!" Sunoo's voice echoes through the empty room of lady Lee, "Might I have this gown, dearest brother?" He asks and Jaeyun spares him a glance.

He is holding up a yellow gown with short sleeves and orange Suns embroidered on the bottom of the dress and the sleeves.

Jaeyun just smiled, "Of course. You and Jungwon shall pick whatever you like from the dresses. As long as we get to share them", Jaeyun giggles as Sunoo frantically nods and takes the dress and puts it over his already worn gown and looks at the mirror. He turns and gushes over it.

Jungwon giggles, "Have you not got an ounce of respect for the elder? Let Jaeyun choose his own dresses and the rest we get", he says and smiles.

Sunoo scoffs, "We share everything already, why bother?"

They all laugh as they go through them, Jungwon commenting that Sunoo shouldn't be this eager when getting clothes was prompted by a death.

They all quiet down when they hear a knock to the door, Jaeyun goes and opens it, revealing Lee Heeseung standing there.

Jaeyun's heart flutters at the sight of the man, standing tall and broad in front of him. Their eyes meet and Jaeyun has to look away immediately before he blushes.

"Sir Lee", he greets and bows. He moves out of the way and looks at his brothers, "These are my younger siblings, Sir. Sim Sunoo and Sim Jungwon", he says and the two omegas bow to him, Lee Heeseung bowing back.

"I apologize for interrupting", he says, "However I wanted to speak to you alone", he looks at Jaeyun, "If that is alright with you, nurse Sim?"

Jaeyun inhales sharply before looking at his brothers, both nodding for him to go. He bows them goodbye before looking at the alpha, the alpha nodding and holding the door open, waiting for the omega to exit.

He wonders, does the alpha remember him? Will he now tell him that he has thought of Jaeyun every night since that ball as well? He wishes to hear at least some recognition in Lee Heeseung's voice.

When they are both outside the room and the door is closet, Lee Heeseung makes a gesture for Jaeyun to start walking.

He does so and Heeseung follows next to him.

"I have not got the time to tell you this at the funeral", he starts and Jaeyun's heart beats faster. Will he tell him that he remembers him? That he, too, remembers the ball where they both met and shared quiet jokes and teasing remarks. Again, he cannot stop thinking of that.

"Yes?" Jaeyun prompts him to go on and Heeseung looks away. He seemed nervous.

"I just wanted to thank you for taking care of my aunt", he says and Jaeyun cannot help but feel the slightest bit of disappointment, "She isn't one to acknowledge her defeat and to have someone as kind as you near her... I just know she is content with her end."

It does warm Jaeyun's heart to hear that. Lady Lee was really loving, even though Jaeyun got the feeling she didn't know how to show that love to some people. She wanted what was best for them and, how Cho Yeobin put it, she recognized kindness and awarded it.

"It was nothing", Jaeyun starts, "She gave me safety when it was a rough time for my family. She saved us all", he says, motioning his head into the direction of the room where his two brothers resided.

Heeseung hummed. It was quiet for a few seconds before the alpha spoke up, "Will you continue working now that you have found money? I am sorry if it seems rude to ask, however I have asked mrs. Jang about you", he said and, again, without much doubt, his heart started hammering in his chest at the thought of this man thinking of him.

Jaeyun looked in the other direction, clearing his throat, "I will. For now, the money of your aunt will give me time to look for a proper job", he says and Heeseung nods his head, at least he thinks he does. Jaeyun cannot look at him from the way his cheeks still burn.

"What would you like to do? Were you always wanting to be a nurse? If you don't mind me asking", the alpha asks and Jaeyun, albeit stupidly, blushes again, at the mere thought this man is interested enough to talk to him. He doesn't remember that at 15 he was this shy.

"My first plan was to be a governess. I was a nurse since that was the job that was offered. I wanted to go around and ask for a position but I haven't gotten the chance to start", he says and Heeseung acknowledges him by humming again.

"Well the best of luck to you", he says, "But always know that this place is open to you, as it was my aunts house. You have helped her greatly, you aren't even aware how much."

It strikes him then that lady Lee must have written to the alpha a lot about him. He wasn't aware that all the post he was bringing to the post office was about him.

He looks up at the alpha again. It cannot be he doesn't remember him. Jaeyun remembers him so clearly and vividly, like he was always there. Even now, when his face has matured and looked more serious, he still recognized him.

-

As he picks up the bread from the Park bakery, his eyes land on a red jacket and white pants making his way to the small, delicious smelling place.

"Sunghoon!" He yells out as he sees him, a big smile on his face. The sergeant also smiles and waves. Once inside the two hug each other and laugh lightly as Sunghoon's mom ushers them outside to talk.

Sunghoon decided that it would be best he walked Jaeyun to his house, stealing a glance at Sunoo while there.

"So", Jaeyun starts, "Tell me what you and lady Lee talked at that one ball where general Park showed up", he said and Sunghoon snickered.

"I'm just going to say that you should thank me", he said and smiled.

~

"Sergeant Park", lady Lee says to him, looking up at him, "You have your eyes set for the middle sibling of the Sims, am I correct?" She asks and Sunghoon, albeit with a little hesitance, nods.

"Yes, I do, lady Lee. I am waiting to marry Sim Sunoo", he says and lady Lee smiles gently.

"Waiting? To get a higher position?" She asks and Sunghoon nods again.

"I do not want to marry Sunoo while I am only just a sergeant. I want to prove to him some stability."

Lady Lee smiles dearly. She takes a sip of her wine and tastes it on her tongue before responding, "You are deeply in love, my fellow", she tells him and Sunghoon's ears go pink.

"It is what I shall promise him forever. Safety and security and... and love", the sergeant says, looking down at his own cup of wine.

Lady Lee hums, "I am well aware of his family's situation", she tells him and he steals a glance at her before watching Jaeyun lightly coverse with some older ladies, "And I want to help. Both the family and your love for each other", she says and Sunghoon's eyes are on her again.

He takes a second before answering, "In what way, might I ask?" He asks.

She smiles, "It is no secret I am as old as this town, if not older. My end is near", she begins and Sunghoon makes an effort to counter her words but he doesn't because she lifts a hand, shushing him immediately, "And I will have to write my will and share my fortune."

Sunghoon already has a presumption what it might be about but he still asks, "What are you planning on, lady Lee?"

She smiles bigger now, almost grinning, "I am not of much treasure, dearest sergeant, however what I do have I am willing to give away. I plan to thank Jaeyun for his actions. With money", she reveals and Sunghoon inhales.

His eyes watch Jaeyun glance around the ball room and sip on his wine idly, "Are you sure of that, lady Lee? I am not doubting Jaeyun's service, he is the kindest person I am aware of. Yet you do know you are making a big decision", he says.

Lady Lee laughs, "Once you reach my age, young man, you will be more thankful for the little things people do to you. And your guilt will chase you. That is why I find my money most comfortable in the arms of the Sim family. They did a lot to this town", she says and Sunghoon nods.

"You are of noble doings, lady Lee", he says and lady Lee only scoffs.

"I only appreciate what is given to me. And I want young love to bloom, not perish", she says, smiling at the end.

In that moment come Jungwon and Jaeyun, their conversation ending.

~

Jaeyun gasped loudly, smile wide on his face.

"I will never forget that lady. She really saved me when I had no other choices. She saved us", he says jumping three times before hugging Sunghoon.

Sunghoon lightly laughs before hugging him back. As they got closer to the gate, Sunghoon is now close enough to open it, so he reaches and lets Jaeyun enter first, the omega smiling big as they walked through the door.

"Thank you, Sunghoon-ah", Jaeyun says, "And thank you to dearest lady Lee. You saved us", he says one last time, letting them into the house.

Sunghoon only chuckles again, "I did nothing, all was lady Lee's doing. But I agreed for all of you and for myself. So do not fret."

They parted ways, Jaeyun going to the kitchen to leave the bread there and Sunghoon going to the garden where he could catch a glimpse of Sunoo.

-

Dearest Jungwonnie,

My love, I have been thinking about you since the ball as well. I miss you dearly, so, so much. My officers tell me that we should visit for the next ball as well, however I am not sure will we make it.

There are too many troops on the west border and there might be a bigger problem happening than what we expected. But do not worry, my love, all is under control.

I send you this gift so you wear it at the ball. I want you to have something of mine when I see you. I think it will suit you.

My greetings to your family, I hope to see them as well, with them sergeant Park too.

Please take care and write to me. I will see you shortly.

With love and sincerity,
your Jongseong.

-

This ball, all three of the Sim brothers were nervous.

Jungwon was wearing a necklace that hugged his neck and sat on his collar bones so prettily it looked like it was molded for him. With that, a cream white dress that framed his shoulders and reached the floor, followed by golden gloves, shoes and hair band. He looked lavishing and expensive, like a true omega of a general.

Sunoo and Jaeyun were proud of him and happy for him. It's not every day the general shows up at a ball. Let alone that said general is to wed their brother.

Sunoo was anxious to see Sunghoon again. Their last time at the ball was chaotic and ended with the general coming in to interrupt their lip locking. He wondered will they pick it up from there or will they only talk tonight... He hoped to at least steal a kiss from him.

He wore a maroon dress from lady Lee's closet, black lace adorning the ends of it and the ends of the sleeves. The cut out above his chest was a little bit larger than he usually goes for but he likes it - he thinks it suits him.

Jaeyun knew Lee Heeseung would be coming. It was inevitable. He was a resident in this town now, what by the house he lived in and what by the staff that probably edged him to come. He knows those people. They are people of fun and freedom.

He is nervous. This is the place where they met. It is the place where Jaeyun, he cannot beg to differ, fell in love with him all those years ago. His heart still beats hard and fast when he sees him and that means something, that much he knows.

Jaeyun wouldn't go and say he loves him now. He only fancies him. Likes his looks and presence. Likes the way the alpha stands still and overlooks, seeping dominance into the world, unknowingly.

He just... He had hope that Lee Heeseung's brain would remember him, in this setting and with his gown.

He had grown too old for his old dress that he wore at that ball. He was sure his corset would suffocate him and the length wasn't right. However he tried to at least replicate it.

He wore one of Jungwon's dresses. It was dark blue and had white ruffles around the cut out above the chest and around the ends of his sleeves. His shoes were white as well, complimented by a small white bag and white hair piece. The dress was a tight fit considering the two brothers have different builds, but he still fit in it.

Their mother looked at all of them after getting ready, smiling brightly and kissing their cheeks. Their father only smiled and opened the door for them. Right now, none of them know where their parents went after they entered the ball.

Jaeyun, in all his nerves, looked around and spotted Sunghoon, alpha of the hour for Sunoo. He was sporting his usual uniform, stoic face and firm stance. When their eyes met, Jaeyun waved and gestured with his head at Sunoo.

Sunghoon's whole demeanor changed. His ears reddened, at how the middle omega looked, face morphing into one of nervousness. His stance was shaken up and he turned around for a second, seemingly getting himself together.

When Jaeyun giggled, the other two turned to him in question. Jaeyun just smiled, "Sergeant Park appears quite nervous tonight", he says and giggles as Sunoo's back straightens and he looks around before spotting him, inhaling before looking at the other two next to him.

"Should I go to him?" He asks and Jungwon laughs behind his hand nodding, Jaeyun already pushing him forward.

Sunghoon sees the other walking his way and decides to meet him half way.

Once they reach each other, Sunghoon looks down at him and gently bites his lip. Sunoo blushes lightly, looking to the side.

"Dearest", Sunghoon starts and Sunoo looks his way, blush still apparent, "You look quite astonishing tonight."

Sunoo hides behind a giggle and bows, "You as well, sergeant", he smiles and looks down, meeting eyes with the older's fists that were clenching and unclenching.

Sunoo looks away again, smiling slightly before looking up at Sunghoon.

"Do you care for the next dance, sergeant Park?" The omega asks and Sunghoon laughs nervously albeit more relaxed now.

"I would love nothing more, my dear", he says and they go to put their glasses on a nearby table, lightly conversing as the song that was playing ends. They get into position as soon as it started playing.

One of Sunghoon's hands ended up on the omega's waist and the other holding his hand, the other's hand on the taller's shoulder. They moved in sync, when one stepped back the other stepped front, when one stepped left the other one stepped the same side. Sunoo's dress spun around his legs and feet as they did, the black detail meeting at two different ends of the dress and clinking lightly together.

"This dress suits you", Sunghoon told him and lightly tightened the grip over his waist.

Sunoo only smiled, "I'm glad you like it", he said, "I wore it for you in hope you would find it nice", he added, Sunghoon's face reddening. He doesn't know what Sunoo is doing for him to blush so hard.

Sunghoon only smiled at that, the two dancing lightly, looking at each other, no words exchanged. It was calming, like they needed this. Like they needed touch as light as feather from the other.

After the song finishes, they walk to the side of the room and pick up their wine again. Sunoo takes one sip, Sunghoon at least three.

"So", Sunoo starts, mischievous glint in his eyes, "Where were we the last ball before general Park made his entrance?"

Sunghoon inhales again, his nervousness present, "Outside. In the garden. We were... standing quite close", he says and Sunoo fights a smile.

"How about we... go outside and see if we could, I don't know, resume what we were doing?" The omega asked and Sunghoon flushed at that, nodding right after.

Sunoo was nervous before but when he saw how nervous Sunghoon was he decided to shoot his shot.

-

Jungwon was swirling the drink in his cup lightly as Jaeyun stood next to him, still looking around the room.

Jungwon catches him in the middle of a sigh and squints his eyes, managing to set his drink on a table near by.

He decided to speak up, "I understand why Sunoo would be nervous. Every meeting with Sunghoon makes him as such. I myself am nervous because I might see the alpha I am to marry for the second time in my life. Why are you nervous?"

Jungwon takes more care than usual to scan Jaeyun's face and his body language. He sees his nervous fingers stop tapping on his glass, sees his eyes freeze on the floor, sees his lips pull tightly in.

He looks him up and down. It was one of his dresses and Jungwon lent it to him without a second thought. He never stopped to think why that dress in particular? It doesn't look like anything special, that is for sure.

Jaeyun clears his throat, "It is nothing. I just... I am not so sure, when general Park comes, who am I to talk to with both you and Sunoo gone?" He smiles and lightly laughs as Jungwon looks at him.

Jungwon decides that it isn't good to put it out just yet, "Oh, you have never been shy, you know most of these people. What is the matter, Jaeyunnie? You seem more nervous than ever", he says and Jaeyun only clears his throat.

The older looks away and sips on his wine one, two, three times before setting it down. He doesn't say anything even after that and Jungwon's smile grows.

"Jaeyun-ah", he starts and Jaeyun still isn't looking his way, "Is there an alpha you are expecting tonight?" He asks and Jaeyun clears his throat, not daring to steal a glance at the younger.

"I do not have a single ounce of knowledge about what you might be talking", he says to the small omega next to him, clearing his throat.

Jungwon laughs behind his palm before clearing his throat as well and taking a second to calm himself down.

"Jaeyun", he starts again and Jaeyun cannot help but feel cornered, "You are aware that both Sunoo and I will keep secrets and refrain from teasing as much as we can?"

Jaeyun sighs and looks down, cheeks puffing, "Fine, I'll tell you", he says and Jungwon almost jumps in place before a hand catches his wrist, "But you mustn't tell a soul."

Jungwon nods eagerly, smiling brightly at his older brother.

"I met an alpha at the first ball I ever attended", he starts and Jungwon gasps, "Don't get too excited, it's boring", he warns and Jungwon just nods for him to keep talking, "And we... I really liked him then. However I did not learn of his name or of anything from him. However I have met him again not long ago and he has moved into this town. He... he does not remember me so I cannot keep my hopes up, however I wore something similar to this on the first ball where we met."

Jungwon takes it all in with wide eyes and gasps, "How come you didn't say anything all those years back? And I wondered why you rejected every alpha to ever propose to you."

Jaeyun snorts, "He was an artistic soul, I am not sure if he is one now. But when I told mother of him she just told me there was no point in falling in love with someone who makes art, since it is not a reliable source of income."

Jungwon gasped. He thought for a few seconds before looking at the older. He, then again, looked around and hummed to himself. He faced Jaeyun, "Is that alpha Lee Heeseung?" He asked and Jaeyun gasped.

"How did you know?" He asks.

Jungwon smiles in triumph, "So it is him", he gets closer to the older, "Sunoo and I have both had suspicions that he might be interested in you. He looks handsome!" He squeals and Jaeyun has to close his ear to keep his cochlea from breaking, "And I guessed it was him because there weren't a lot of people that moved into this town and the only I know of is him", he says it so simply it makes Jaeyun shutter.

What if Heeseung sees it too? The way Jaeyun acts with him around?

Jungwon watches the guards that except everyone into the hall. He sees them except a mother and her alpha daughter, sees an elderly couple enter, sees a few known faces enter. And then the man of Jaeyun's hour himself makes his way inside.

Jungwon doesn't alarm Jaeyun just yet, wants him to find out for himself. He sees him enter with another alpha, tall as well. He doesn't pay much mind to him though, focusing on the wondering eyes of Lee Heeseung making their way all across the ball room.

First they settle on the traveling glasses of wine and his fingers take two, one for the other alpha next to him. His eyes wonder again and find Jaeyun. Jungwon hides a gasp behind his palm as he sees Lee Heeseung's eyes go over Jaeyun's body once, twice, before he looks away and takes a sip.

He doesn't take his eyes off of the alpha, following his moves. He takes another sip while looking back at Jaeyun. Jungwon glances at his brother who was leaning his head to the side and back, neck and chest fully exposed now. He quickly looks at Lee Heeseung who looks away as soon as his eyes land on the skin, showing gentlemenly manners.

Jungwon decides his brother is blind to not notice him and so he pushes an elbow into his ribs. Jaeyun looks at him and Jungwon doesn't say anything, only motions to the entrance with his head. He steps away from Jaeyun than, going to find a place to sit at.

Jaeyun locks eyes with Lee Heeseung and gasps, his surprise at the other looking his way visible. Their eyes are locked for several seconds before the omega breaks it looking at where Jungwon used to be.

He looks around once more and doesn't notice a body coming closer to him. When the body is mere inches away, he looks to the front and sees a tall alpha.

"Oh", he let's out, "Sir Cho", he says and smiles, glancing behind him in hopes of stealing a look from the other alpha but he doesn't see him.

Cho Yeobin smiles, "Nurse Sim", he says to him, "Could you do me the honor of dancing with me?" He asks and, with warm cheeks, Jaeyun accepts. Not before taking one final look around the ballroom, hoping to catch another tall alpha.

Alas, the wanted alpha is nowhere to be found, so as Jaeyun accepts Cho Yeobin's open palm, he walks to the dancing area of the room and starts dancing in circles.

"Might I say, dearest nurse Sim", the alpha starts, "You look quite lavishing tonight. This color suits you", he says and Jaeyun smiles at the compliment.

"Thank you", he smiles, "You look quite handsome, Sir", he says back and knows he flattered the man when he lightly chuckles and looks away.

They dance until the song ends, when they bow to each other and walk to the side, still hand in hand. Jaeyun smiles at the thoughtfulness of the alpha as he leads him around making sure Jaeyun does not get lost.

He doesn't know where Jungwon left or where Sunoo and Sunghoon are or, the most important, where Lee Heeseung went to, but he knows that Cho Yeobin has his full attention now that they started up a conversation.

"My sister, she", Cho Yeobin started, clearing his throat, "She is quite sick these days. Her immune system is failing. However I am glad that lady Lee left us her dog Saimase. She gets along great with her and I feel like it makes her happier."

Jaeyun, the other one who was left lady Lee's other dog, nods, "Layla is very lively and happy as well. I see kids of some of our servants playing with her. It is adorable", he laughs behind his palm at the thought of all the happiness lady Lee unintentionally brought into their home.

Cho Yeobin laughed as well before the topic was stirred south, "I have heard you are looking for a job."

It makes Jaeyun's smile lessen for a second before he crooked his lips up.

It is true. Jaeyun has been searching for a job again. He decided that enough time passed and he was to work again. However, not a lot of people in town are looking for governesses.

"That is true, Sir", he starts, "However, there is not much opportunities in town. I might just have to ask beyond it."

It's inevitable, Jaeyun knows it. He asked almost everyone in the city.

Cho Yeobin spoke up with an easy smile, "How about we make a deal?" He said and Jaeyun hummed in interest, "The first thing you have to be aware of is that you want to be a governess and this isn't a governess job."

He starts and Jaeyun almost counters him, but Yeobin puts a hand in the air.

"Let me finish, Jaeyun", he says and Jaeyun nods, albeit with hesitance, "My sister is, as before mentioned, ill. And all the nurses we've had had been omegas of old age and not much of a company for her. As far as I know, my sister Iseul is one year younger than you and it could benefit her - the socializing and the help you provide."

Cho Yeobin said aloud the information and Jaeyun had to look down in thought. He wasn't sure about it.

"You do not live in my city."

Cho Yeobin only smiled, "A private carriage will arrive to your home each morning and you will have private quarters in my home if you wish so."

Jaeyun's eyebrows furrowed, "I am not as skilled as a professional nurse."

"Yet somehow, my past governess lived on you for around two months."

Jaeyun still shook his head, "Your sister has an illness I know nothing about."

Yeobin counters, "His old nurses would brief you."

Jaeyun sighs, leaning his head back before locking eyes with the alpha, "I still am not sure", he says and Cho Yeobin only nods.

"That is quite alright. I'll give you time to think it over", he opens his coat and pulls out a piece of paper, "So you can contact me later."

It was his name and address, Jaeyun presuming he had more of them in his coat. Jaeyun nodded and put the paper into his small bag, closing it.

Cho Yeobin was about to speak up again when both their attention was whipped by the guard at the door announcing something.

"From the royal army", they said, "General Park sends a letter to", they look down to read it, "Sim Jungwon."

Jaeyun stands up and looks around for his brother, the white dress that he wore fluttering as he rushed to them. They gave him the letter and soon after, Jaeyun walked his way, bowing to Cho Yeobin in thanks and excusing himself from their conversation.

He faced Jungwon who was holding the closed letter. The younger looked up at him, "I think this means he shall not come tonight", he whispers, aware of the many people staring their way.

Jaeyun bites his lip and takes the youngers hand, leading him outside and to the nearest bench.

Jungwon inhaled and exhaled once more before opening it.

My dearest Jungwonnie,

I apologize. I kept your hopes up. I truly trust this letter doesn't reach you too late.

Our plans lead us far away from your town so I am not able to attend this ball.

I am sure you look astonishing with the necklace I gifted you, at the end I am sure you look good with anything.

I miss you much. I hate that I wasn't able to see you tonight. However I am glad that at least I am keeping you safe.

Until next time, my love.

Yours only, Jongseong.

Jungwon bites his lip as he reads the letter. Jaeyun can see the slight hurt but acceptance in his eyes. He can see the hope dying down but growing back up as one of his hands reached the necklace around his neck.

Jaeyun held his brother by the shoulders, caressing his forearm lightly. The younger only smiled, "Is it uncommon that I miss him this much? That I wanted him to come so greatly?"

Jaeyun smiles back, his own smile not reaching his eyes, "It is not. You fancy him much. There is nothing wrong with that, my dearest", he says and massages his shoulder.

Jungwon exhales, "I really hoped he could see me tonight", he said, facing the older, "I think I look quite splendid in this dress."

Jaeyun laughs, "It suits you perfectly. General Park would absolutely lose his breath if he saw you."

-

Sunghoon is holding Sunoo's hand, their fingers gliding together and swinging as they walked. Sunoo seemed to lead them even further than last time, all the way behind some rose bushes.

They haven't talked from when they entered the garden, both of them shyly walking. Step by step they kept on turning around to look at the hall and if someone was near them.

Once they found a bench that was far enough, Sunoo sat down and pulled the other with him. Sunghoon sat down, close to the other, close enough that their shoulders touched.

Sunoo looked at him, "How is it? In the military and all that?" He asked. He sounded awkward but didn't falter with his words. He wanted Sunghoon to know that he cares. That he always cared.

Sunghoon lightly laughs, "It is alright. I do not think anything new had been happening for a while."

Sunoo nods, fingers fiddling with the lace od his sleeves, "Good, good", he said and cleared his throat, "Sunghoon", he addressed him by his first name, "Can you kiss me?"

It was said fast, like an air that was let out of the omega's lungs. Sunghoon softly laughed and turned to face the younger, taking his face with one of his hands, the other taking hold of Sunoo's fingers.

They are face to face, Sunoo's eyes looking at Sunghoon's lips and Sunghoon's eyes looking at Sunoo's lips. They lightly got closer to one another a centimeter of a gap in between. Sunoo decided to take the initiative and leaned forward, crashing their closed lips together.

Sunghoon let out a sharp inhale through his nose, the inhale tickling Sunoo's upper lip. Sunoo giggled into the kiss as the sergeant's hand travelled from his cheek to the back of his neck.

They parted for a second, "You do know that the last ball you stole my first kiss?" Sunoo says to him, his pointer finger making light circles over the older's uniform collar.

Sunghoon laughs lightly, "It was a first for me as well, my dearest", he said and reconnected their lips, pulling the younger in by his neck.

Their kiss this time was a bit harsher, their bodies moving as well. Sunoo fell backward a little bit from the sergeant pushing his lips to his.

A light gasp leaves the omega as the other's teeth graze over his bottom lip. He immediately feels a muscle prodding it's way inside his mouth, pushing another gasp from the omega.

Sunghoon parts their lips and looks at the younger, the younger staring back, "I hope I am not stepping over your boundaries here, dearest."

Sunoo only shakes his head, eyes on Sunghoon's wet lips, "Kiss me like that again, please."

So Sunghoon did. He deepened the kiss when Sunoo's open mouth greeted his, tongue thrusting in and out.

Sunoo decided to experimentally move his tongue as well, nudging the other's. It started a fight of the two muscles, not as strong but certainly powerful.

It got even more heated when the sergeant moved his one hand that was on Sunoo's free one to his waist, pulling him impossibly closer. Sunoo's now free hand finds it's way to the other's nape, his other hand still gripping at the other's collar.

The kiss was so wet and warm and hot that Sunoo felt his lipstick melt from his lips. Or maybe Sunghoon licked it off of him, his tongue doing so much more than imaginable.

They part only to breath, their breaths migling closely as the distance is still small between them.

Sunoo gulps before talking, "God", he starts, taking in one more breath, "That was amazing, Sunghoon", he says and smiles lightly as the other meets his gaze.

Sunghoon nodded, "We should do this more often", he says and smiles kissing him lightly again, "Now, we should get back though", he looks around them, "The ball is ending."

It was true and Sunoo had to exhale in a sad tone at the thought. He looks at the older's lips before giggling, "Sunghoon, your lips are as red as mine", he says and Sunghoon stares at him, swiping his fingers over his lips.

It's dark where they are, but there still are dim lights around them, enough light for Sunghoon to see that his finger is now a deep pink.

He takes a handkerchief out of his pocket and gives it to Sunoo, the omega standing up to clean the older's lips. He is gentle and playful while doing it, soft fingers caressing his lips calmly.

Sunghoon, still seated, straightens his back and grips the other's waist with one of his hands, holding him in place. He sees the light blush on his cheeks and smiles.

Sunoo scoffs, "Don't move your lips", he says and Sunghoon has to laugh at him. He takes his hand that is holding the handkerchief and lowers it, connecting their lips once more.

Sunghoon smiles into the kiss and smiles even wider when they part, "Dearest Sunoo", he starts, "I am so in love with you I could fly when I kiss you", he laughs as the younger hits him.

"Do not say such nonsense, sergeant", he says and Sunghoon let's out another laugh.

Once Sunoo is done with his lips, Sunghoon takes the handkerchief and lightly pats the other's lips, also smudged from the product.

After he cleaned them, the softest pair of lips he has ever seen and had the honor to touch, he extends his arm and gives the handkerchief to the omega.

The omega stares at him before taking it. Sunghoon looks away, "I have given you one handkerchief already. When we were younger. This one doesn't even have my initials on it but I would like you to have it. As a reminder of how my lips feel on yours."

Sunoo blushes and stands up straighter now, face turning to the side, "Do not say such things, please", he says and looks back down at Sunghoon, extending a hand for the older to take.

He does and they walk hand in hand to the ballroom. When close, Sunoo stops to shove the handkerchief inside where the opening above his chest is.

Sunghoon faces the other way to give him privacy, his ears turning pink as he does so. Sunoo only smiles, looking around before he tiptoes and kisses the older's cheek.

"I am in love with you as well, just so you know."

-

Chapter Text

Lady Lee had two dogs.

Layla and Saimase. Layla was a golden retriever and Saimase was a black labrador. They got along great, sometimes fighting but mostly playing around, snapping their jaws left and right as they chased one another.

They provided lady Lee great joy.

She couldn't go out into the garden the last few days of her life, so she made the maids and cleaners clean them, wiping their paws as clean as ever for them to go to her room.

The dogs adored her. She was their goddess and made them feel safe. It was best seen when they saw her and ran to her but never jumped up, only nudged her palms with their snouts.

Jaeyun loved to play with the two dogs. Loved to accompany the young boy that took care of walking them. He loved that the dogs were so alive.

They were what lady Lee felt. She didn't look her best for the last couple of weeks of her life, however she was lively when she could be.

It was charming, seeing her rest with her dogs. She looked so much happier with them. She looked content and at peace.

The dogs were her energy for her last days on Earth. They provided wide smiles and soft fur when she was the saddest.

And the two dogs were rarely apart.

That's why this new settlement might have shaken something up between them.

And that is probably what stands behind the letter Jaeyun got only 3 days after the ball ended:

To Sim Jaeyun,

My biggest greetings to you and your family.

I am writing to you because of our dogs, Layla and Saimase. Recently, I have felt Saimase was a little less energetic.

I was hoping that the two dogs could meet someday close.

I propose to send a carriage your way and for you and your dog Layla to get in and go to our manor. There, they can run and play as much as they want in the country of our estate.

Please, write to me. You do know the address.

Sincerely,
Cho Yeobin.

And that's exactly why Jaeyun was now standing in front of their front door, waiting for the Cho carriage to pick him up and lead him to their manor.

Layla was next to him on a leash, patiently sitting still and looking around.

He wasn't sure if it was a good idea but his two brothers wholeheartedly agreed that this outing of his is amazing.

(Jaeyun received the letter on a Wednesday morning and his brothers found it that same evening. They read it, of course, marching their way into Jaeyun's room after and giving him the letter.

"Who is this alpha, Jaeyun?" Jungwon asks and Jaeyun has half a mind to think he knows him and is just wanting to clarify from the look on his face.

"I met him at lady Lee's funeral. She was his and his sister's governess. I received Layla and his sister and he Saimase", he says and now is the time for Sunoo to speak.

"And do you fancy this fellow?" He asks and Jaeyun gasps.

"What on Earth are you talking about?" Jaeyun asks back, eyes wide and one hand over his chest in shock.

Sunoo squints at him, "You are blushing, Jaeyun-ah", he tells him and Jaeyun looks away.

He clears his throat, "I do not like him. He gave me... He gave me a handkerchief with his initials on the funeral and danced with me at the ball. And he asked me to care for his sick sister so I think this meeting would only be for his sister's sake", he says taking the letter in his hands again and scanning over it.

Sunoo takes the letter from him as Jungwon speaks, "Jaeyun, he is trying to get close to you", he says, "The only thing you have to know is if you'd like him to get close.")

And Jaeyun still wasn't sure.

Does he like Cho Yeobin?

He doesn't get a second to think more, a brown carriage arriving before him and Layla.

They both get in, Jaeyun sitting down and Layla laying, her head resting on his lap. He taps the roof of the carriage and it started moving, both the dog and him shaking from left to right before speeding up.

Jaeyun looks out of the window.

His situation isn't ideal. He knows that. He is a working omega of the middle class. Usually, the omegas in his class would marry alphas as rich as they can. However, he knows his situation doesn't abide to that life.

The one alpha he once found ideal was out of the window. He doesn't remember the night they spent on his first ball. Even Jaeyun wouldn't think it was this man that once was an artistic young boy full of imagination if it wasn't for his looks and the way he spoke.

Jaeyun sighs. When he saw him first at the funeral, his stomach turned. His stomach turned as well when his eyes met Lee Heeseung's at the ball.

His eyes wonder to the dog in his lap. He pats her soft head.

Every time Jaeyun realizes how much he blushes and how careful he acts around the man, he wants to hit his own head.

They saw each other a total of three times. Had maybe three conversations. This year that is.

Seven years ago Jaeyun and him talked about various topics, all in that one beautiful night.

Before he could think any longer he sees a big estate, a happy dog and three children playing with it happily, a girl with brown hair sitting in a chair close to them, covered by blankets and warm robes.

The carriage stops before the sight, the driver getting down from his place to open the door for Jaeyun and his dog.

Layla's head shot up at the sound of a bark so familiar it already reminds her of home.

Jaeyun laughs shortly, exiting the vehicle and bowing to the driver, the driver bowing back.

He steps out and Layla immediately runs inside, through the gate and to Saimase, her dearest sister.

"Layla!" Jaeyun yells after her, running to where the other's were, the two dogs already playing and snapping their jaws at one another.

He stops running when he meets the kind figure of the girl, the omega, sitting there with the kindest smile he has ever seen. There is a woman next to her, also an omega, wearing a white cap over her hair. The omega's maid.

The girl goes to stand up but the maid goes to stop her, standing her ground firmly. The girl ushers her away playfully, childishly, as she faces Jaeyun again.

"I apologize greatly", Jaeyun starts, bowing, "Layla is so lively now. Must be that she got to meet her sister again", he says, trying to hide the smile at the fact that his dog was playing so happily.

"No need to apologize", the boy says, "She is welcome. And if your name is Sim Jaeyun, so are you", he says and Jaeyun blushes lightly.

He walk closer to the boy, bowing to him, "It is Sim Jaeyun", he says, "You must be Cho Iseul. Sir Cho Yeobin's sister", he says and Iseul laughs.

"That is me, you are right", she says, also bowing back, as best as she can in a sitting position, "Call me Iseul. And can I call you Jaeyun? Brother told me we are around the same age", she says and Jaeyun nods.

The maid excuses herself once Iseul's eyes land on her, getting the few kids that played with the dogs inside.

Iseul moves over and offers Jaeyun a seat. Jaeyun does as he is instructed, sitting down next to the omega.

He looks at her attire. If Jaeyun's attire is more luxurious than the usual nurse or governess, Iseul's was on another level.

Her dress was light pink with white details so delicate and small Jaeyun had to squint at them to see them. Her skin was pale so the white ruffles looked just a shade lighter than her actual tan. The blankets thrown over her were thick and embroidered in gold accents, making Jaeyun understand just how rich this family was.

Her jewelry stood out the most. Gold, he would bet real gold, around her neck and fingers, the two earrings dangling slightly and shining like bright diamonds.

Jaeyun looked down at his attire, a dark green dress with hardly any embroidery, black gloves and shoes, a simple hat over his head. He looked closer to the maid than to Cho Iseul.

"My brother has mentioned you to me. I am so very glad to finally be able to meet you in person", Iseul says and smiles so gently it makes Jaeyun's heart flutter at the pretty sight.

Jaeyun looks down at his lap before replying, "Your brother talks about you to me as well. A lot. You two seem close", he says and Iseul giggles lightly putting a palm over Jaeyun's hands in his lap.

"You seem very proper, Jaeyun. I really would like to get to know you", she says, eyes closing slowly, exhaling softly through her nose. Her slightly playful demeanor seems to dim as she presses her lips closed.

Jaeyun cannot look away. Cho Iseul looks so gentle, so light, so careful, so elegant. She is like the picture perfect omega, calm and down to Earth.

Or maybe it is the sickness Cho Yeobin talks about that is making her so calm, tired almost. Jaeyun looks from the boy to the dogs, now chasing each other around them, happy to be together.

As Cho Iseul goes to say something she is interrupted by an alpha's voice, "Jaeyun", the voice says and they both turn to it, "Glad you could make it today", he bows to Jaeyun and Jaeyun quickly stands up, doing the same.

Cho Yeobin stands there with a smile on his face as he looks at Jaeyun, eyes quickly scanning to meet Iseul's as well, the two nodding to each other.

"Thank you for having me, Sir", Jaeyun says, head bowed down still.

Cho Yeobin pulls out a watch from the inside of his coat and opens it. He looks up at the two, "It is almost lunch time. Shall we get going to the dinning room?"

Iseul nods eagerly going to stand up. There is a maid that Jaeyun hadn't noticed was there running up to her, helping her stand up and walk. Yeobin accompanies Jaeyun, giving him his arm to latch onto.

Jaeyun follows, one hand around the alpha's arm and the other holding his dress as he walks.

They make it to the dinning room in no time, the table already set.

Cho Yeobin sits at the head of the table, his sister next to him and Jaeyun by his other side.

The first dish is soup, the maid giving the plate with the most soup in it to Iseul, to which the omega rolls her eyes to.

"They always do that", Iseul comments when her and Jaeyun's eyes meet, "Give me more food than anyone at the table. They think that will cure me", he giggles.

Cho Yeobin butts in, "Well it will certainly give you energy."

Jaeyun lightly laughs before speaking, "Soup contains a lot of vegetables that were cooked and prepared to the point where it is the most nurturing. Soup heals", he says and it gets and interested hum out of the alpha and a gentle smile from the omega.

"You know a lot, Jaeyun", Cho Yeobin tells him and Jaeyun just smiles and looks at his plate.

"Our cooks, both at home and at lady Lee's manor are very happy to share information with whoever asks", he says and waits for the two to start eating first.

The siblings look at one another before Cho Yeobin puts a napkin over his lap and picks the spoon up, eating the soup.

After the soup, the main meal and dessert that was all littered with light small talk about Jaeyun's life and questions about theirs.

When Iseul was half done with her desert she excused herself to go to her room, a maid helping her stand up and walking her to her room.

Yeobin sighed, "It is like this most days", the alpha says, Jaeyun listening patiently, "She gets tired rather quickly and doesn't have the energy for most things."

Jaeyun isn't sure if he should ask more. It seems like a private matter. However he is aware that this outing to the alpha's estate is primarily for Jaeyun to welcome the idea of being the nurse to Cho Iseul.

"What caused all this?" He asked carefully, putting down the spoon with which he ate the desert.

Cho Yeobin sighed, "She once was so lively. Running around, having fun, often causing trouble. Lady Lee always scolded her but never said anything to our parents. She wanted her to experience fun. And that was smart on her part, because as soon as she turned 16, her immune system started failing her", he says and Jaeyun's heart hurts from hearing that.

He knew Iseul was a year younger than him, making her suffer for 5 years with this disease.

-

Cho Yeobin showed him around the house. Thoroughly. He showed him around the halls of the big manor and to the gardens where the two dogs were now gnawing, each at some bones the maids gave them.

"Nurse Sim can you do me a favour?" Cho Yeobin asks and Jaeyun nods quickly, moreover without thinking about it.

The alpha leans on a nearby tree looking at the omega play with the dogs, "Actually two favours", he corrects himself and Jaeyun spares a look at him, nodding for him to continue.

"You don't have to call me Sir. Yeobin-shii will do just fine", he smiles and Jaeyun shyly laughs, heart skipping a beat. Then, Cho Yeobin takes a step closer and crouches next to Jaeyun, petting Saimase's head, "And I would really like you to think about being Iseul's nurse. It will soon be winter and she is in dire need of grater help."

Jaeyun isn't sure if he is the greater help they need for he is not educated in nursing. But it seemed both Yeobin and Iseul thought he could do it.

-

Omegas usually have sweeter scents.

Something like flowers and sugars and sweets. Fruits too.

Jaeyun has a lemony scent that has sparks of vanilla in it. He quite prides himself in it. It is pleasent on the nose and when he is sad or angry it sours but you do not notice it as much as when another omega is as distressed.

His fresh scent is different from his brothers'. Sunoo has a chocolaty scent that has sparks of fresh mint in it and Jungwon one that smells like a rose garden with bits of pomegranate.

The scents suit them - bouncing off of Sunoo's sweeter tones and Jungwon's gentler ones.

Their mother smells like jasmin tea and honey. They all agreed that their scents are nothing compared to her one. It reminds all of them of home.

Alphas usually have scents that are spicier, more muskier. They can also be a little bit more fresh and clear.

Jaeyun isn't the biggest fan of those scents.

Their father smells lightly of chilly and it used to irritate his nose when he hugged him as a little boy.

Sunghoon has a minty scent, perfectly going with Sunoo's one. Jaeyun and Jungwon often joke that they haven't smelled any mint before Sunoo met Sunghoon, but after their meeting, it's like his scent was found.

Jaeyun isn't sure what general Jongseong smells like, however Jungwon has described it as the feeling after lighting a candle on fire. Neither Jaeyun nor Sunoo knew what that meant.

Lee Heeseung... when they were teens, Jaeyun didn't have the best sense of smell, so his only association with him was patchouli. It was a flower their mother loved to put in their house so it smelled fresh and clean. 

It was rare for alpha's to have a flowery scent, however that was possible.

How much he smelt of him, from their talk in lady Lee's house and at the funeral, the smell of patchouli has a musky undertone, overpowering if he were to really take his time and smell him. Nevertheless, it was a pleasant smell. He liked it.

Cho Yeobin smells like a rosemary garden, full of that strong and dominant spice. Sometimes, it made Jaeyun look away from purely the intensity of it.

Sometimes, when the letters he sends smell like him, Jaeyun has to put them on his window to wind out.

The smell isn't unpleasant however it is quite strong and Jaeyun has to breath small breaths while close to the alpha.

And that has been often these past few weeks.

He has decided that his best offer by far is to be the nurse of Cho Iseul.

His parents seem to like that more than being a governess. ("When you treat the wealthy you are highly regarded. Some do not care about their children but do so about themselves.")

Jaeyun only sighs. He loves children. He would love to have some of his own one day. He doubts it since he is not married and most probably will not be soon. So the next best thing is to watch over them and teach them.

However for now, as a permanent job, he will take the offer of the Cho siblings.

He is much rather faced with welcoming life than with leading it to make their last footsteps.

Isn't that ironic? How he started with wanting life but always went one step closer to death? Sunoo would disagree, say that he is helping the ones who are in need to live longer.

Cho Yeobin also disagrees. He thinks that Jaeyun's company has done far more things good for Iseul than bad.

"She adores it when you come around. She always smiles when she sees your carriage arrive", the alpha would say when the two were left alone in the gardens, Iseul sound asleep and resting in her room.

"I hope I am not a bother to her. I sometimes feel like it would be better for someone more experienced to do this job", he says, eyes casted in front of them at the few servants' children playing around.

Cho Yeobin is looking at him, "I beg to differ, Jaeyun", he says, an outline of a smile present, "She cherishes your company", he says and looks from Jaeyun's face to his hands that are fumbling in his lap.

Jaeyun doesn't say anything back. He still looks at the children play.

"Jaeyun", Cho Yeobin addresses him, "Would you mind staying for dinner as well? Our main cook returned from his break, I would like you to try his dishes", he says and Jaeyun stares.

They are both aware that Jaeyun will try the dishes tomorrow at lunch, and the day after, and the day after. However, Jaeyun is also aware of Cho Yeobin's slightly flirtatious remarks.

He remembers the handkerchief. He remembers the letters that come doused with his scent, so much he is certain the alpha scented them himself.

And Jaeyun sometimes reciprocated that affection and attention.

Because Cho Yeobin is now the person who he talks to the most, right next to Iseul.

The carriage comes for him early in the mornings and if not both then one of his brothers is sleeping. He arrives back home at nighttime and doesn't get to see his mother go off to bed.

Some days are exhausting because of the trip he has to take every day, but some days he feels proud of what he is doing. Helping and healing.

So really, saying no to Cho Yeobin, an insanely attractive alpha who just so happen to be interested in Jaeyun, is highly unprofessional.

"I would love to, if you would have me", he says and smiles gently at the alpha before looking back to the children.

Yeobin nodded and stood up, "I ought to work now. You relax", he says and bows, Jaeyun bowing back to him.

Iseul usually slept for about an hour more, so Jaeyun was free to do whatever he liked.

Jaeyun decided it was best to watch the kids play, peacefully watching over them.

One boy bounced his way, once he saw that Cho Yeobin was not near him.

"Nurse Sim!" The boy exclaimed, "Play with us!"

Jaeyun was stunned for a few seconds. He has been watching over the kids the past few weeks and they have never came to him and asked him to play.

One maid ran to them, "Minhyung! Do not bother nurse Sim!" She hisses and the child ducks his head down in slight fear.

Jaeyun quickly startled himself out of his trance and stood up, "No worries. I would love to play with them."

The maid was left standing there, scanning his face. If he was really serious about this. She was aware that neither of the Cho brothers ever wanted to play with the children and the higher ranked staff considered themselves too noble for child play.

However, Jaeyun's warm tone and smile made her reluctantly nod and let go of the boy that took Jaeyun's hand almost instantly and ran to the group of kids that cheered when they saw the omega approach them.

There were three girls and one more boy standing there, all dressed in similar clothing: two girls in white dresses and all the others in blue pants covered in dirt.

"Hi!" One of the girls said, smiling bright and taking Jaeyun's hand, "You are very pretty! We want to be your friends!" She said and Jaeyun lightly blushed.

"You are even prettier, darling. What is your name?" Jaeyun asked, a big smile across his face as he talked to the little clique.

"I'm Minji!" The girl says, "This is my brother Minhyung", she pointed to the boy that led Jaeyun to them.

"I am Hyejung", one girl says and giggles, "This is Yejun, and this is Seohyun."

Jaeyun bows to every single one of them and smiles brightly when the children imitate him and bow as well, the two girls holding their dresses and the others simply bowing.

The children ran around and played with Jaeyun for what felt like a decade, all smiling happily and looking like they had no care in this world. Jaeyun surely hoped it was like that for them.

Out of a sudden, Hyejung gasps loudly, "Look, nurse Sim! It's a snail!" She says and goes to pick it up but Jaeyun shoos her hand away.

"Do not touch his shell. His shell is his home. Would you like someone to treat your room as such?" He smiles when the girl shakes her head and goes to stand up.

Yejun furrows his brows, "How is that his house? Can he lose his house?" He asks and Jaeyun has to giggle at how adorable the boy looks.

"Well, he carries it on his back wherever he goes. And inside, the snail shields himself when needed. There are some species of snail that do not have their homes on their back. They love rain as it makes their skin smoother and it is easier for them to move."

Hyejung asks a question then, "Nurse Sim, can he lose his house?" She asks.

Jaeyun nods, "Well, in a way. When he is ready to die, he shimmies out of his little house and leaves it. So now there are only those shells left of them on the ground."

The kids look at him in awe.

Jaeyun giggles and decides that he should hang out with the five of them more often. They make him happy.

-

Sunoo's hat is doing little of protecting him from the Sun that shines over his arms, lightly sending a burning sensation to Sunoo's brain.

Sunoo doesn't mind it. He doesn't mind the aggressive warmth sent their way from the sky.

He does mind, however, his parents walking right after Sunoo and Sunghoon, the elderly couple keeping an eye out for the two.

"When will they depart? I am seriously getting tired of not kissing you", Sunoo sighs and holds Sunghoon by his arm tighter.

The alpha let's out a crisp laugh, making Sunoo look up at him with a smile full of adoration.

Sunghoon looks down at him and faces the look of softness on the omega's face, "What?" He asks with a brisk laugh, eyes facing the front.

Sunoo smiles to himself, looking forward as well, "Nothing in particular. I just love you", he says it and Sunghoon lets out another laugh, with this one his ears turning to a warmer colour.

"Don't say such things when I cannot kiss you", he says and Sunoo nods aggressively.

"You see? That is what I am telling you!" He says and Sunghoon has to laugh again at the silliness of the situation.

Sunoo's parents have decided that it would be best for them to take a walk. Right after Sunoo declared he was going to take a walk. With Sunghoon.

Sunoo had in mind that they would walk for some minutes before sneaking behind the Park bakery and kissing right until one of them declares they are hungry, and after that they leave to take something from the bakery and then who knows, maybe one more walk.

But like this, he cannot escape his parents and their eyes.

He has been aware of them these past few weeks.

Jaeyun was rarely home at daytime and Jungwon was preoccupied with the letters Jongseong sends him frequently. So, the only son they can bother is Sunoo. And Sunoo is awfully private when it comes to his beloved.

To his parents at least.

Jaeyun and Jungwon know everything. From the first time they met to the last time they kissed. And it seems his parents want to know more about his relationship.

Sunoo leans onto Sunghoon's shoulder, "How is it in the army? Do you train much?" Sunoo strikes a conversation that is well known to them, usually talked around more people, as to appear only friendly and a little flirty. Like two young adults, waiting for the alpha of the two to propose. A pity that won't be happening until Sunghoon is promoted in the army.

"Well, we have been training more this past week or so. I would say captain Park's troops will be joining us soon and they are far more advanced. Or so I have heard", he says, looking into the windows of some of the shops.

Sunoo hums, "So you are preparing to meet their strengths? How are you doing, love?" He asks and briefly looks at him, the alpha humming.

After about five seconds of only walking in silence, he spoke up, "Sunoo, my dearest. I believe there is a war ahead of us", he says and Sunoo halts in his steps.

He stands there, in the middle of the road, hair lightly tousled to the side from the wind under his hat, "What might you mean?"

Sunghoon sighed, turning to him, "A battle that is coming our way. And I believe that it will happen soon enough. And I will have to leave. If only for a few days. The battle will do little to this town, but on the field there may be severe issues."

Sunoo is staring at him. He looks stunned and unmoving, one hand coming up to cover his open mouth.

A moment later, he closes his eyes and it looks like he will cry, let his tears fall down his soft cheeks.

However, he looks down and the next thing Sunghoon sees is him looking up with a smile, taking his hand in his, "I'll have to kiss you even more then", he says and tugs at the hand, taking a turn and hoping his parents do not follow.

Sunoo tugs him to a corner behind a shop, brick walls around them.

Sunoo looks out of the corner and sees his parents pass without sparing a glance at the little corner. He faces Sunghoon, the alpha already looking down at him with a smile.

Sunoo smiles back and kisses him, soft, sweet lips meeting saltier ones, Sunoo's hands going around Sunghoon's neck to hold him still, pull him down enough so their bodies are closer. A mix of mint and chocolate envelopes them. 

Sunoo's hat gets knocked and is now hanging by a string around his neck, Sunghoon's hands laying flat over his back, just below the hat.

Sunoo opens his eyes and takes a breath in when they part. He smiles when Sunghoon looks around the corner, making sure nobody is nearby.

Sunghoon gently takes the hat off of him, putting the strings that were tied around his neck around his arm. He then puts his arms around his middle and tugs him forward, the two of them giggling when their noses bump.

Sunghoon kisses him on the nose before smiling gently, "I love you so much", he tells him and kisses him shortly on the lips.

Sunoo kisses him on both his cheeks, "I love you even more, my love", he tells him, hugging him close.

When his face wasn't in front of Sunghoon's he let his smile slip off his lips.

If war was ahead, it meant not only his beloved but also Jungwon's one, will be off to fight. To leave and possibly never to return again.

He closed his eyes and pressed himself closer to Sunghoon.

-

Jungwon decided that to get Jongseong off his mind, he has to go outside.

He is dressed in one of his lighter dresses, pink fabric moving around as he walked around his room, putting on the necklace Jongseong gave him.

He has worn it every time he went out. Not so much to boast but to have it as a reminder that his alpha is so giving. And when he is home, late at night in his room, he thinks of the alpha as he looks at the necklace. A reminder.

Most couples in their part of country start with the alpha giving a small gift to the omega. A handkerchief more or less. Both his brothers have received it from numerous suitors. Even he has, even though none of them were important since he had his future husband.

This is the first actual gift the alpha has given him and to him, who grew up in this town, it means Jongseong has promised him something. Care. Adoration. Love between all of that.

He got out of his room and to the garden, calling their dog.

He took Layla on a leash and let her lead him wherever.

They got to a vast park at the edge of the town.

He lifted his dress to his ankles when the road became wetter, Layla happily hopping around on the leash, leading Jungwon deeper into the park.

Jungwon giggled when Layla barked at a passing dog but did not spare him another look as she sniffed her way deeper into the park.

She started barking more and running faster once she spotted a tall gentleman, making Jungwon almost fall from the acceleration added into the light run they had.

He would have almost fallen if it wasn't for the pair of arms that caught him right in time, Jungwon quickly realizing he is not on the ground and standing up straighter.

He is met with black hair and black clothing, gloved hands holding onto his elbows.

"Are you alright?" The man asks and Jungwon smiles as his posture becomes more relaxed crouching down to pet Layla on the head.

"I am, Sir Lee", he says and looks up at him, "Layla seems excited to see you after a while", he says and the man laughs, crouching down as well, gliding his hand through the fur on her back.

"Last time I saw her she was merely a puppy. I do not understand how she remembers me", he says, smiling down and petting the dog.

Jungwon hesitates before asking, only fearing to impose the young gentleman, "You have not been to this town much before lady Lee's passing, am I correct? I do not remember you", he says and the alpha hums, straightening his back to face the omega. He gestures for them to walk ahead, Layla wagging her tail between them.

"I visited often before. I was living on our family estate, not to far from town. It took me but an hour ride to my aunts house. I loved spending time with her. Layla and Saimase were very small at the time, she has just gotten them", he smiles down at the dog that was walking between them.

Jungwon, afraid to question why he hadn't been here in a long while in fear of invading personal information, only hums, "I remember when I was little and lady Lee was still of enough health to walk them. They were always so happy around her", he smiles.

Lee Heeseung nods his head and exhales, "If you would have told me both Saimase and Layla would outlive her, I would have not believed you", he says, eyes down-casted.

Jungwon takes that as an invite to ask some questions, "From what you are saying, I take you and lady Lee were close?" He asks, stealing glances at the alpha as they took a turn, Layla leading the way.

The alpha nods his head, "Yes. She was more of a mother to me than my own. Always took care of me. It made my mother mad that we were so close", he says. He looks like he's contemplating saying his next words, "My aunt was the only person I kept in touch with over the years of my travel. I was always moving, but she always knew where I was. She wrote to me every other week, I wrote back in the weeks in between."

To show he was listening, Jungwon hums and nods his head for him to continue.

"She wrote to me about exhibits she found in the towns where I resided. Somehow, she knew of art better than I, however much I prided myself in being the most knowledgeable in that field. She would always say that she got the details from a friend that went there for holiday. I always", he pauses, looking down, "I always thought of opening my own gallery. An exhibit of my art. My art isn't grand but my aunt liked it. If I were to open a gallery, I would have sent a letter under fast delivery so she could get it faster. Would send a carriage her way, lead her wherever the exhibit is. She would be the first to come inside. The first to see it."

Jungwon, left soundless after the sad 'what if' situation Lee Heeseung just laid out to them, looks at the alpha with big eyes.

The alpha looks at him and then exhales, "I apologize, I talk entirely too much. I should-"

"No, do not apologize. I am glad you had shared this with me", Jungwon starts, "I think", he pauses, "I think your bond with lady Lee is very pure and admirable. I have only met one of my aunts and she didn't really like me", he wanted to share some of his own story, but not overshare it too much.

Lee Heeseung looks his way, eyes wondering. Jungwon decides to stop, tugging Layla to a stop as well, the dog looking at the two on both of her sides.

"You might miss her, your aunt", Jungwon starts, "But she lives through memories, and with that, through art. I myself am no expert or artist. I find my handwriting untidy, so I do not imagine my painting being better", a light laugh from both of them, "However, I know that to stay in this world forever, be remembered through centuries to come, you must create. Be it art in the form you practice, be it teaching, of what lady Lee had done. She created and bestowed new knowledge on the kids she taught. To live longer is to extend yourself beyond your borders. Beyond yourself. Live outside of them and around them."

Lee Heeseung was watching the younger male talk, mind deep in thought. He looked like he wanted to say something, but chose not to. He looked away, in distance, before looking back at the omega.

"You are very knowledgeable. What you said is wisdom. I admire your words, Sim Jungwon. Thank you", the alpha says, bowing shortly.

Jungwon smiles lightly, "I have been writing letters to a person I only saw on a canvas for the past few years. Your imagination wilds", he says. 

They soon part ways, Jungwon feeling happier in hopes he helped Lee Heeseung feel more relieved of the passing of his aunt, and Heeseung feeling lighter from their conversation.

When Jungwon got home, he quickly let Layla into the garden and sat down at his table to write the general a letter. When Heeseung got home, he sat in front of a blank canvas, imagining and dreaming.

They both created. They both imagined.

-

It was town's day in four days.

Every March 5th in their little town, it is celebrated with fares and other events.

Jaeyun remembers when he was a little boy and was asked to participate in the town's play with other kids his age, Sunghoon included.

He remembers having so much fun and his parents giving him free time with his peers. He remembers that that day he really felt higher than the rest.

Maybe it was the adrenaline of the applause they got for a good performance, or maybe it was the sheer freedom he felt then as a mere 11-year-old.

But he remembers that this day was one of the happiest he has had the pleasure of having.

So, him and his brothers always made an effort to help the town folk while these days lasted.

He has promised his brothers that he will be there three days before the festival and on the day of the festival.

He told the Chos that and they only nodded and let him go, saying that they'll make an effort to show up there.

The festival took time on Thursday, which means Jaeyun will be with his three brothers from Monday. He was excited to finally be with the two.

Since he started working at the Cho manor, he has less and less time for himself and hanging out with his brothers. While at the manor, he does relax with a couple of the maids and has fun with the kids, however his brothers are irreplaceable.

"I was thinking", Sunoo started, full of energy, "We should help with the flowers first", he says, walking backwards, as to face his two brothers who were looking at him.

"Okay", Jungwon starts, "What do you have in mind?"

The three were just about to pass a bridge that lead straight to the town hall, where the fair will start from. Around them, various vendors are already preparing things for the fair, some busy arranging the tents, others still planning how everything will look like. 

The three omegas stop next to the edge of the bridge, looking down into the water that flew under them.

"Maybe we could start with some common flowers that we could find wherever we can. You know, dandelions, poppies, daisies even", Jaeyun says, resting his head on his palm.

Jungwon hums, "I like that idea. We will not use much of our expenses since they are not of the expensive kind. But they are still pretty and dainty."

Jaeyun nods, "That is exactly what I was thinking. Maybe make some bouquets from them or put them in vases? After the flowers we should probably start with the-", he stops himself as his eyes land on Sunoo.

He looks deep in thought, eyes slightly glazed over as he looks in the distance. Jaeyun follows his gaze and is met with the troops in the far lands, away from their town. Not far enough not to see.

"Sunoo, are you doing alright?" Jaeyun asks him, both brothers looking at Sunoo, eyes worried.

Sunoo hums, "I think we should light candles in the hall after we are done with the flowers", he looks at the other two, "It would serve a better atmosphere than just lights", he says, smiling lightly and gently.

Jaeyun and Jungwon look at one another, "Alright", Jungwon says, "But are you doing fine, Sunoo-hyung?" Jungwon asks, one of his hand landing on the other's arm, smoothing it over.

Sunoo nods, a smile still plastered on his face, "Just tired, don't mind me", he says.

Later that day, Jungwon went to collect their lunch from their maid so the three could have a picnic, while the other two stayed, spreading out the blanket.

Jaeyun is lightly humming to a tune he heard recently in the Cho manor.

Iseul liked music. She felt at peace when it wasn't quiet, when there were instruments playing in the background. One of the maids Jaeyun had gotten closer to told him that Iseul used to dance. That lady Lee used to twirl her around as she giggled and laughed and jumped in her dresses, free and fun. And when she was older she started asking for professional education in dance. Now, she can barely walk longer than ten minutes. 

Jaeyun doesn't want to feel pity for the younger Cho sibling, but he cannot bring himself to be positive. He cannot imagine the sadness that would come with having to quit your life dream.

"Hyung", Jaeyun is shaken from his thoughts by Sunoo's gentle voice laced with worry.

Jaeyun straightens up and looks at his brother, "Yes, Sunoo?"

Sunoo sits down next to him, first looking at the direction where Jungwon was supposed to come from with their food, before looking back at the other, "I talked to Sunghoon-hyung the other day. He told me... there may be war in our country. Where he'll be involved and where... general Park will be involved", he says, eyes worried.

Jaeyun's eyebrows knit together, "How so? I have not heard anything from father, he usually knows things like that", he says.

Sunoo shrugs, "I trust Sunghoon, he is one of their soldiers. But if that is to happen, and if we were to... well, not lose, but have some type of bloodshed", he starts, eyes closing, "Not only is Sunghoon-hyung in danger but also general Park", he says, making eye contact with Jaeyun.

Jaeyun stops. He looks at the other, eyebrows knitted, "That is why you suggested candles. Because Jungwon said the general smells like lighting candles", he says, eyes wavering from Sunoo to the blanket.

Sunoo nods, "He has to be comforted somehow. I know they haven't seen each other much, but they know one another. Through letters. No matter how little physical contact they had, they grew close. Losing the general-"

"Do not talk of that like that. General Park and sergeant Park will return if there were a war. If for someone than for you two. They love both of you much, alright?"

-

Jaeyun admits easily that he can be manipulated by his two younger brothers. 

When Jungwon gives him those big round eyes that make him do anything the younger wants, or when Sunoo snuggles close to him and gives him various compliments, he can also get all that he has ever desired.

And now, he has been abandoned by his two younger brothers to go to the post office to find the flyers that their town provided for the fair day. 

The kindest mrs. Bae asked them to bring them to her in the town hall so she could give them to the young alpha boys who distribute it. They weren't yet done with their picnic, but mrs. Bae needed them now, not later.

And so, Jaeyun is now making his way to the post office, one of his hands bunching up the material of his dress so he walks faster.

He walks past the Lee manor, glancing at it briefly. 

From the outside it still looks the same. One of the maids is cleaning the windows from the inside, talking to a butler next to her. He's glad Sir Lee wasn't strict with them, much like lady Lee made sure they all felt at home in their manor.

Mrs. Jang told him once, over a cup of warm tea, that when lady Lee's sister would visit, far before their disagreement,  every single one of those servants that was now cleaning freely, was stoic and careful, as to not make lady Lee's sister mad. 

Jaeyun is glad Sir Lee was much like lady Lee.

He exhales. He hasn't seen the other for a while. Jungwon briefly told him that they talked a few days ago, while the omega was walking Layla. He didn't say much, just that Sir Lee is still grieving his aunt. 

His heart feels heavy hearing that. 

His feelings are a lot at the moment. He fails to not think about lady Lee's older nephew every day. He imagines them talk, smile at each other, laugh, touch. He imagines them doing everyday things, things his parents do. Talk over a cup of tea, read books in bed next to each other... Jaeyun has imagined that face next to his for 7 years, he doesn't think that person being near him would subdue that effect.

He isn't sure what he feels. He thinks the alpha is brave, brave enough to leave his home to go live on the streets. Brave enough to return, despite his mother clearly not being pleased. He was mature enough to not fight his mother, not lash out on everything she did to him. He also feels compassion towards him for the loss he is grieving, clearly greater than his own.

Maybe, if they were to talk more, he would clear his head and feelings, but now, he is not as sure. He had been hoping that Sir Lee might have remembered him from that night, but he does not show any recognition.

He exhales hastily. 

He thinks of him, even if those thoughts were mundane.

On the other hand, he has even less of a clue what he feels towards Cho Yeobin, an alpha that, as far as Jaeyun can tell, is interested in him.

What makes Cho Yeobin different from every suitor that has come his way in the past 7 years? Was the sudden appearance of his wished upon alpha the thing that opened his mind to the possibility of reciprocating Cho Yeobin's intentions? Or does he really like him more than the other suitors?

Does he actually feel something for Cho Yeobin or does he feel... rejected by an alpha he dreamt about for the past 7 years? If that something is actually real, how does he know it is?

But he had never even looked at his past suitors twice, knowing that not one of them would come near to the spirited soul of the alpha boy that kept his heart in clutches for the last 7 years. Was he disappointed that the other did not remember him? That he does not seem to show interest? Sunoo had told him he sees Lee Heeseung being interested in him, but he isn't sure what to believe since he has not seen the other in at least a few weeks? 

When did he see him last? At the ball? And there, they didn't even talk. 

He doesn't know what he feels entirely, however he is sure most of it is disappointment and sadness, for his desired alpha did not... know him. Remember him. Even talk to him.

He sighs. Maybe the first thing he could do is think if Cho Yeobin's feelings were reciprocated, since he is not really sure were his feeling for Sir Lee Heeseng reciprocated.

-

Dearest Jongseong-hyung,

I have not written to you in a while. 

My brothers and I have been busy preparing for the town's day fair. I hear from our servants that this year will be grander than the last few. I wonder what will there be? Last year, we had our first ride in a hot air balloon! I wrote to you about that, remember? We were all to scared to go in it, both alphas and omegas. But then, one omega maid came front and walked her way to the balloon. I still think about her. She showed such bravery!

I wish to see you soon, as always, however I am not sure that will be possible. You wrote to me you were more busy in the weeks to come, so I believe my heart won't miss you any less.

I have also been working on a little gift to give you once we meet again! I spoke to an acquaintance of ours and he inspired me to start making this. I really hope you like it. But to  know of that, we first need to see each other again. I hope it will be in soon time.

Yours truly

Jungwon

-

Chapter Text

If we were to talk about grief, Jaeyun would always think of their mother.

She was strong and hard working, appreciated rules and what they made. She cried little, especially for an omega. Where their dad was always jolly and joyous, she would be strict.

But not in a bad way. She was always looking out for them.

Their mother's brother died giving birth to her niece, and with that leaving his alpha to tend to the child, with help of much maids.

Her brother's spouse was not the happiest with the family he married into, so he made no effort to keep up with them. With that, he also cut off the only person that could remind their mother of her brother: her niece.

Their mother was a wise woman. She went through much to get them where they are. She helped their father take the spot for the first mayor of their town, with that securing them with money and stability.

When that stability was gone, she proposed a marriage of one of their sons to an alpha.

She always looked out for them, as a family, because her own one couldn't do that for her nor her brother.

She always said this, especially to Jaeyun who was the oldest and who would've understood the best: "When a person loses someone close to them, it is the worst thing to do to not mention them after their passing. Act like nothing happened. That might as well kill the person. Jaeyun, you need to ask, need to talk about it. Ask them about the memories, about the times they spent with them. They will be thinking of those people, with you asking or not. Just... always use your words. Talk to the ones who are hurting. And be patient. Okay?"

Jaeyun has not faced bigger situations with grief in his life. There was his uncle dying, but he was small then. There was a funeral of one of their older maids. He was younger than 14 then. And there was lady Lee's passing.

Jaeyun had been close to his uncle, or so his mother tells him, prior to his uncle finding a mate. After that, Jaeyun's baby brain almost forgot about him. The maid was not one to deal with children. She was more of a gardener and cleaner.

He hadn't known lady Lee for long before her passing. Maybe a little over two months. The woman had shown him great strength and fighting. She was smiling most of her last days, the exception being the visit from her sister. She was so... happy. Both to be alive and to eventually die. Jaeyun spent many nights thinking that because of that, the passing of lady Lee (which was inevitable to come, at least in the next year) would not hit him as much. Because lady Lee was fine with leaving this world.

However, he felt greater pain than loosing his uncle or their maid. Maybe it was because she was his first employer, opened the door to many opportunities. She was there to make him laugh about the mundane. Maybe because now, he's older and understands his emotions more than before.

Even now, a few months after her passing, he remembers her fleetingly. While he eats her favourite soup, or while he dresses in one of her dresses. Or when he sees her favourite flowers. Or when he-

He thinks of her. She was very dear to him.

He also thinks of her nephew, Sir Lee, who must have been going through something tougher than he is. Sometimes, he feels guilty for crying after her, when he was nowhere near as close to her as her nephew and some other members of the staff. He feels guilty at being given so much from her at her funeral. He feels guilty knowing that he is crying now when she told him not to before her passing.

He contemplates going to the Lee manor many times, wanting to talk to the staff and ask them how they are doing after lady Lee passed away. He doesn't go there until the morning of the town's fair.

He knocks on the front door, hesitant and slow, minding that he might not be the most welcome since he, really, has no real need to be here. Alas, Sir Lee told him he could come here anytime.

(Deep down, a voice tells him that he went here only for one certain black haired alpha. He pushes the voice down and deep inside him, wanting nothing more than a clear mind once he enters the manor.)

A maid he only knows by the looks opens the door and smiles big as she sees him, "Nurse Sim", she says and bows, Jaeyun bowing back, "So good to see you! Come in!" She said and let the other one come in, closing the door behind him.

She takes his coat and hangs it on a nearby hanger. Jaeyun gives her his umbrella (it is not supposed to rain, however he wanted to be sure to arrive dry), and takes from her his bag, which she was holding while he took of the coat.

"Are you here for Sir Lee? Shall I alert him of your arrival?" She asks, and Jaeyun feels a butterfly flutter its wings once, twice in his stomach.

"I have not come for him, no", he rushes to say, "I wanted to check up on all of you. How everyone has been doing and...", he trails off, "If everything is okay."

The maid nods, "You are very kind, nurse Sim. Always so dear to us", she says and leads him to the tea room.

He clears his throat as he enters the slightly nostalgic picture. (Should he feel nostalgic over something that lasted so shortly? Should he feel this way over a mere house?), "I have not got a clue how this goes. Should you alert Sir Lee? It is his home, at last", he says.

The maid hums, "That should be true for most households. However, Sir Lee told us we could bring people dear to us here, for a short amount of time, just not upstairs. And since you are dear to us all, I think he shall not mind", she says, and he hums.

Sir Lee is a kind gentleman who thinks of his staff and lets them be free with each other and with him. He seems kind to them, that is important. (He ignores his heart skipping a beat at the gentleness and thoughtfulness.)

"If you say so, I believe you", he says, smiling lightly, "Could we go to the kitchen first? I would like to see mrs. Jang", he says, and the maid nods.

On their way to the kitchen, they get caught up with other maids and servants twice, Jaeyun asking questions of their wellbeing and health. They all greet him nicely, thanking him for taking his time and coming here for them.

When they get to the kitchen, mrs. Jang sniffs the air only once and turns around with wide eyes, "Nurse Sim", she says once, looking at him, before breaking into a smile, "Oh, Jaeyun, I have not seen you in a while!"

Jaeyun smiles and the two hug gently, the maid that led Jaeyun here disappearing after the two greeted each other, "Hello, mrs. Jang. I am here to catch up with the staff. I hope I am not interrupting your work", he says, and mrs. Jang laughs gently.

"Nonsense, dearest. You will always be welcome", she says.

Over the next hour, they elope in a conversation about mrs. Jang's daughter that has now been going to a good school thanks to lady Lee, and about how Jaeyun now works as Iseul's nurse, and how little he sees his brothers.

"You should find a new job, Jaeyun-ah", she tells him, "I see you are fond of the family and like to help, but you never wanted to work as a nurse", she exhales as Jaeyun nods.

"I was thinking long and hard of rejecting the offer, however they needed help and it", he clears his throat, "They seemed to like me and I seemed to feel needed", he tells her, resting his face on the palm of his hand.

"However", she starts, getting the jar of salt out of a cupboard and salting what is in the pan, "You have all this knowledge that lays upon you. So well educated and read. So well equipped to pass that onto others. Onto little children, omegas and alphas. Such a shame to waste it."

He counters fast, "I am not wasting it. I like working there, that is what is important."

Mrs. Jang chuckles, "You like it, you don't love it. This is something your mind forced you into liking because it is compensating for the lack of something you love", a pause, they are both quiet, until mrs. Jang turns to him, "Am I not right, Jaeyun?"

He is quiet for about a minute, watching mrs. Jang stir something that smelled delicious as his eyes lost focus for the time.

Maybe mrs. Jang is right. Maybe he should really be looking into that. But how will he find a job? Where? He started searching for it before Cho Yeobin offered him a position at his manor, and it was hard to find someone offering even a helping hand. It seemed that being a governess was harder than he thought. Moreover, it was hard to find someone hiring.

"I do not believe you are wrong, however I do not believe you are right", he tells her after a quiet minute, "I like working there because Iseul and Sir Cho are good to me and the job isn't... It does not ask for much from me. That is what I am fine with."

Mrs. Jang hums, "Alright", she tells him, then she turns off the stove and turns to him, "But you will have to promise me this", she tells him, an accusatory finger pointed his way, "If there is a job offered that you are interested in, take it. Do not think long and hard of how the Cho's will react. Take it and enjoy it. If not for yourself, then for me, your old friend."

-

Jaeyun is on his way out of the manor, the same maid that opened to him now offering him his coat, as from upstairs he hears footsteps coming.

His heart beats faster, stronger, losing rhythm as he smells him first, then sees him, then meets eyes with him.

He feels his pulse speed up, and his eyes widen as he faces the alpha, and the alpha stares for a second longer before averting his eyes elsewhere.

"Bae, could you please bring me my coat?", he bows to the maid and asks her, she's bowing back and leaving for it.

Jaeyun cannot think straight. All that is in his mind is his scent, which seems so much stronger than it was when they last talked. (A voice in his head provides him with the information that Sir Lee is in his home, and the last time he was just moving in, so really, that is a sign of how comfortable the alpha got in the manor and with the staff.)

"Hello, nurse Sim, how may I help you?" He asked, kind eyes directed to the other, watching how Jaeyun goes to grab his umbrella (it had not started raining in the time he was talking to the staff).

"Oh, I was just here to talk to the staff and how they feel after lady Lee's passing", he says and sees how the other seems to downcast his eyes.

So, Jaeyun asks, "And how have you been holding up?"

He looks up, clearing his throat, "Alright", he says, and then a second or two later, "Still a bit shaken", he says.

Jaeyun nods. Of course, he was in touch with lady Lee right before her passing. Even if he was not there for her physically, he was there with her, "Understandably", he says. He thinks for a moment, a surge of braveness hits him, "Are you heading out, Sir Lee?"

The maid returns with his coat, "Thank you", he says and bows, the maid bowing back. He then turns to Jaeyun, "I was. I see you are on the leave as well?" He asks.

Jaeyun nods, "I am. I need to help with the fair", he says, adding, "Are you coming to the fair?"

Heeseung hums, "I am. My staff has nagged me enough so I will have to go", he says, smiling, as the maid laughs shyly.

She opens the door to the both of them, bowing as they pass her, the two bowing back.

Once out the door, Jaeyun grips his coat tighter. It wasn't such perfect weather. A little cloudy (hence why he was carrying an umbrella), and a little bit cold. But it was good for the fair, since there were warm drinks and food served everywhere, so it won't be too cold.

He sighs gently. He'll have to help his brothers set up mrs. Kang's stand. They promised that to the woman at least.

"Shall I", Sir Lee starts and pauses for a second, looking away. Jaeyun looks up at him, both of them standing in front of the Lee manor, "Shall I escort you home safely, nurse Sim?"

Jaeyun feels his heart beat faster. It seems that that is the effect the alpha has on him. He has not yet determined is that a good effect or a bad one (he fancies the alpha, it is good in the sense he likes him, it is bad in the sense it can hurt him, physically and emotionally).

"That would be lovely, Sir Lee", he says, bowing his head down, the two stepping onto the road. He thinks briefly before adding, "And calling me nurse Sim is excessive. Call me Jaeyun, Sir Lee", he says and smiles up at the other, smile brightening at the faint red crawling up the other's ears.

"Alright, if you wish so Jaeyun-shii", he smiles down at the other, "But only on one condition", he says and the omega looks up at him with questioning eyes, "Only if you call me Heeseung, not Sir Lee."

Jaeyun stares. It's rare for an alpha to let an omega use their name if they are not close in one way or the other. Jaeyun calls sergeant Park by his name, Sunghoon, since they are quite close, but so does Sunoo. It can be used both romantically and platonically. However, it is unusual for first name basis so early.

With his pause, the alpha adds, "Those are my conditions, nurse Sim", he says.

Jaeyun has to close his eyes. He doesn't like how most now call him nurse. He is briefly reminded of the conversation he had had with mrs. Jang early that day.

"Alright, Heeseung-shii", the shorter replies, smiling at the other.

The walk to his home isn't as long, only around a quarter of an hour. That being said, with the pace the two were walking, it had taken them almost one half of an hour.

"It is", Heeseung stops himself, "I miss her", he says, "She was so supportive. In the dark of everything, she was always behind me or shielding me. She was, in one way, my guardian. And a great inspiration", he says.

Jaeyun nods, "You are a painter, Heeseung-shii?" He asks, even though he knows he is. It was one of the first things he knew about him, after all.

"Yes. My art has many inspirations from different parts of my life", he says, making brief eye contact with the other, "My aunt has always been there to support it, and as such she has inspired some of my works. Added something of hers that was in me", he says, and Jaeyun has to admire him. Their bond was admirable.

"I remember lady Lee mentioning you a couple of times", he says, looking down, "She was mostly talking about how proud she was of you, Heeseung-shii. And how much she admires your courage. And how she...", he trails off, meeting eyes with the other, "She loved you greatly. Cherished you. And... by her face when she would have been reading your letters, I have seen you have loved her as such", he says.

Lee Heeseung stops in his tracks, stands still for a few moments, only the wind playing with his hair and coat, moving the otherwise stoic view of the alpha. Jaeyun stares, maybe a little too hard. Stares at his eyes that seem faraway now, at his hands, tightened into fists at his sides. At his hair that seemed so... gentle on the regal-looking alpha.

"I", he starts and Jaeyun seems to snap out of it and look at him. He suddenly remembered their conversation and blushes at his thoughts, "Nobody has told me this, since her passing", they make eye contact and the way the alpha is looking at him, so honest and raw, is making the omega close his eyes momentarily, willing his senses in, "And I have not known how much I have been in need of hearing that. Thank you, Jaeyun-shii", he says, still staring.

Jaeyun's eyes grow wider, a need to get closer to the alpha, smooth a hand over his arm, tell him that grief was a human feeling and he was allowed to feel it. Alas, they were in public, and if they weren't, Jaeyun knew he'd be stepping over some boundaries.

"It is not a problem, Heeseung-shii", he says, smiling gently, "And she knew of your love for her, do not worry. She had not mentioned you by name, or what you did and how you did it. She mentioned her lovely nephew, that was all", he says, smiling as the other nods.

They soon reach the omega's house and have to part ways, but not before both of them bow to one another and thank one another, Jaeyun for the escort to his home, and Heeseung for Jaeyun's kind words.

-

"And he didn't mention the night you two met, all those years back?" Jungwon questions his elder brother, walking with him to mrs. Kang's post.

"He has not. I believe he does not have the slightest of memories of me", Jaeyun says, exhaling as he averts his eyes from his brother to a nearby park, some children playing around.

"I think he might just be shy", says Sunoo, smiling at his older brother.

Jaeyun rolls his eyes, "You have not had a conversation with him, Sunoo. How would you have known?" He asks and Sunoo laughs at him.

Jungwon hums, "You know, that is a possibility", he says, swinging his bag back and front as they walk, "He had been soft spoken when I talked to him some days ago. He might just be, I do not know, afraid of saying anything?"

Sunoo laughs lightly, "Afraid? He ran away from home at eighteen! I doubt he is afraid of rejection", he says, pulling Jaeyun by his arm, "Come on, stop thinking about him. We have a great day ahead of us, and we are all yours."

With that, he means Jungwon, who will be by him throughout the night, since he had received a letter from General Park saying he won't be here. And Sunoo... He will most probably spend his time stuck to a certain sergeant who can't stop looking at him with those lovestruck eyes.

However sad Jaeyun feels at being without his brother is made up in joy for him and his best friend.

Jaeyun looks up. Lady Lee saved them, didn't she? Her money keeps them at bay, and will keep them until Sunghoon can provide better for one of his siblings.

Then, the family is left with two children, Jungwon and Jaeyun.

Jaeyun is certain that Sunghoon will propose and wed his brother before the general. The general is proper and nice, and wants what is best for his brother. That being said, he is willing to wait for him. Jaeyun had not had a proper talk with the alpha, but he knows it because Jungwon knows it. And Jungwon is to be trusted.

Jaeyun calculates that if nothing bad is to happen, Sunoo will leave their home in about a year, wedded and happy. Jungwon will follow suit in the next year, or soon after that.

Where Jongseong is willing to wait, Jungwon is eager and excited for them to unite at last.

And that leaves Jaeyun with his parents, in the home he grew up in. He is certain that won't change. Even with the appeals of Cho Yeobin and his little crush on Sir Lee, he is sure it won't last long.

He has decided that marriage is not for him or his mind. Would he like to be somebody's omega? What if he loses his freedom and is then left for the alpha only? What if he no longer will be able to walk this town streets?

Of course, that depends on the alpha he will marry, but he doesn't know what alphas are like. Maybe they change through marriage.

He is not willing to entertain the thought of one of his brothers being such omegas. Sunghoon is a good alpha, gentle and kind and soft with what he needs to be, and tough, strong and intimidating when he needs to be.

And for general Park, he is not sure what he is like, however he is sure he will not be one of those alphas, considering his work which couldn't physically allow him to keep Jungwonnie at home at all times.

And when the two are happy, both with children and big, broad smiles over their faces, Jaeyun will be with his parents. Working. Taking care of them.

He sighs. It is like he will be turning in circles. From one job as a nurse to another. This time to his parents. And eventually, he will, as he did with lady Lee, lead them to their end.

He sighs, averting his eyes from the sky. Lady Lee was happy he was her nurse, but he knew she also wanted what's best for him. And maybe being a nurse isn't that.

He thinks about the talk he had with mrs. Jang earlier that day. If an opportunity arose, would he stop being Iseul's nurse?

He hadn't been one for such a long time, only a few months. Still, shorter than he had been a nurse to lady Lee. He thinks about what the Cho siblings say about him, how Cho Yeobin always says that his sister smiles brighter around him.

What if with making himself happy, he would make Iseul sad? That is the last thing he wants.

He bumps into someone's shoulder and apologizes quickly. He needs to get his head out of this haze. He'll think about it another time. Today will be a fun day.

Right?

-

Sunoo did, as expected, skip away to Sunghoon as soon as he arrived.

"Really, I would've thought he would have at least shared a bite with us", Jungwon says, with an air of sarcasm.

Jaeyun laughs, "Don't be so sad. More rolls for us!" He says and eats a sticky rice roll that mrs. Kang gave them as a reward for their hard work and help.

Jungwon shakes his head, "If I ever abandon you this carelessly for someone, please pinch me to normality", he says, rolling his eyes.

Jaeyun laughs louder now, "Don't talk about Sunoo like that. He's just in love, happens to the best of us", he says and smiles at the younger, Jungwon humming.

They are quiet for a moment, before they both hear their parents calling their name. Jungwon sets the plate with the rolls on the stall next to them and waves the elderly couple over.

Their mother smiles at the two lovingly, "Mrs. Kang tells me you two did a great job helping her. Well done, my darlings", she says, gentle smile adorning her face.

They both smile at her and bow lightly, "Mrs. Kang is exaggerating. We only helped a little", Jungwon says and smiles as their mother scoffs, hitting him on the arm.

"Think of your work as hard work. It pays off", she says, smiling at the two.

Their father speaks up, "You both look lively and beautiful. Come here so I can hug you", he says and the two scoot closer, hugging their father close.

They were all wearing coats over their dresses, thick and woolen. Jungwon wore gloves as well, though he took one off to eat the roll. Under the coats were warm dresses with long sleeves and more padding to keep the heat in.

They separate from the hug and their father speaks up, "I am sure Sunoo looks lovely as well, however I have not seen him since I stepped foot outside", he says, one eyebrow raised.

Jungwon snickers and Jaeyun just smiles, "He had whisked Sunghoon away and we hadn't seen him since", the older says, taking the plate with the rolls on it and offering it to his parents.

His mother refuses the offer, but his father takes one, thanking him. He speaks without chewing his food first, "Had I known that he would spend all of his time with that alpha I would have had a serious talk with them."

Jungwon shakes his head, "They aren't doing anything too serious, trust me. They just fancy one another and cannot help but spend time together", he says. He raises his eyebrow as his father mumbles something under his breath. Jungwon quickly follows, "I mean, you two would know, you have been in his position, no?"

And that was true.

Their mother had shared this with the three of them many times. Their father and their mother were deeply in love since the day they met, on their father's first ball.

Their mother was two years older than their father, making her more confident and approaching the alpha she saw and liked on the first glance.

It was also a story of how omegas should never abide to the regular rules and wait to be asked for a dance or more. She always told them to be strong and to know what they want.

Sunghoon was a shy teen, rarely making eye contact with people, regardless of their subgender. Sunoo came in with a passion one day, so set on talking and being with Sunghoon he eventually had Sunghoon wrapped around his finger, asking for time to spend together.

Their mother was proud of how forward her middle son was. He saw an alpha he liked, that was 2 years older than him too, and proceeded to subtly court him. Not in the regular courting way, just... He talked a lot and waited for Sunghoon to court him.

Really, they should be familiar with their dynamic by now. Sunghoon used to be shy but turned confident since he started seeing Sunoo more often. He changed, not for better or for worse, he just adapted to Sunoo.

So, really, if you were to talk about Sunoo and Sunghoon, you'd be mentioning a lovely story of change and love and friendship and hardship. Their story is not as long, but they make up for it in their wake.

"We have been in this position, yes", their mother says, "However, I haven't ignored my parents one bit of the way."

Jaeyun laughs and Jungwon rolls his eyes. Their parents were something, really.

-

It was nearly night in their town, yet all the vendors were still smiling and kindly giving their work to the town folks and the visitors of the town.

It was the one day where they really exploited the night and it's magical form. It's a time for good food and new meetings and plenty of fun for the younger folk.

The elderly spend their time watching the younger ones from the side, laughing and joking about what they are doing and how they are doing it.

Those elderly include their parents, too. So Jungwon and Jaeyun were left to mingle around with the younger crowd.

In the younger crowd, there were mostly couples, with or without little pups with them. Some of them were eating and some of them were taking care of the younger ones.

Amongst all those young adults with little pups walking around, Jaeyun almost didn't notice one duo waving animatedly at him.

"Nurse Sim!" He hears someone shout, a small and cute voice. The voice sounds like it's smiling and moving rapidly.

Jaeyun turns around and is faced with a hyper child and their mother running after him. The child launches at Jaeyun as soon as he opens his arms and squats, the younger nephew of lady Lee hurries into him.

"Hello, young Sir", Jaeyun says, smiling lightly. He did not expect the young boy to remember him so well.

Nishimura Riki smiles bright and giggles as he is embraced by Jaeyun's arms, smile so big Jaeyun has to squint from his brightness.

His mother jogs to them with an awkward smile on her face, "Oh, nurse Sim, I apologize", she says, bowing. She takes Riki's arm in her hand and pulls him next to her, "He saw you and ran so fast, I could not have stopped him", she exhales, taking the boy's jacket and straightening it over his small body.

Jaeyun smiles, stealing a glance at Jungwon who was watching him with an unreadable expression on his face. He then looks at the mother, "No worries, mrs. Nishimura", he says, bowing to her, "I am always glad to see this young Sir."

Riki giggles again as he is hoisted up in his mother's arms, his upper body facing Jaeyun, "Mommy and me came to see hyung!" He says, eyes wondering around Jaeyun's figure and making their way to the figure next to him.

Mrs. Nishimura seems to be embarrassed by what he said, "Heeseung-shii has invited Riki to come here and since he can't be here alone..." She trails of but Jaeyun nods.

Heeseung's relationship with his alpha mother isn't the best, he is well aware of that. He is also aware of Riki knowing Heeseung from before lady Lee's funeral. And he is well aware that their meeting had been behind mrs. Lee-Nishimura's back. Mrs. Nishimura seems like she just wants what is best for her son, and maybe seeing him interact with his half-brother a few months ago brought some sympathy to her? Who knows, really.

Jaeyun doesn't think he wants to make her feel more uncomfortable so he offers with a smile, "I have not seen Sir Lee at the fair yet, so why don't my brother and I walk you through some of the stands. Our favourites, if I may?"

He glances briefly at Jungwon, his mysterious expression turning sweet as he meets eyes with the woman in front of them and her son. He nodded at the two and made brief eye contact with Jaeyun. We'll need to talk about that later.

Jaeyun nods at him and turns to watch mrs. Nishimura's eyes turn from slightly uncomfortable (she was most probably afraid of intruding their night, if you were to ask Jaeyun) to grateful.

"That would be splendid", she says, bowing to the two, the two bowing back.

-

Mrs. Nishimura seems very sweet, if Jaeyun was the one to talk. She seems to care the most about her little son and his happiness.

She walked in front of him, Jungwon by her side, the two conversing about how mrs. Nishimura and her son seem to have a strong dislike to cinnamon and Jungwon loves it. It's light talk, something to talk about when you have nothing else to say. And since they were surrounded by food and drinks from the locals, it was natural to sway in that direction.

Jaeyun was walking behind them with Riki by his side, the boy holding his hand as he looked around and asked questions (What is that fruit? Can you eat the crust of that? Is that sweet? I want that, does it have chocolate?) big eyes scanning all the food and treats there are. Jaeyun bought him a slice of some fruit, since it was already after sundown and he was sure his mother would not appreciate a sugar induced child running around when they got home in a few hours.

"I was thinking of talking my wife into moving closer to the town? I feel like Riki would love some more friends to have and talk to around him", Jaeyun hears mrs. Nishimura say, Jungwon nodding at her.

"That sounds wonderful!" Jungwon tells her, "The town could offer plenty of help to you and your family, you will see. Our mother contemplated of having a governess for the three of us and soon after, the word spread through the town and the next morning she had one knocking at our door!" He says, smiling.

"Ah, you all had a governess?" The lady asks the two other omegas, looking from Jungwon back to Jaeyun. She steals a glance at her son and smiles softly before averting her eyes to the front where she was walking.

Jungwon hummed, "Yes. Mrs. Sooyoung. She was strict in some ways. Harsh or even a little ruthless. But she thought us well. Some more than the others. Jaeyun was her favourite", he smiles and steals a glance at his older brother, the other lightly huffing.

"I was the only one listening to her, that was the reason", he says, smiling lightly at his brother, "But you cannot deny she taught us well. She was dedicated in teaching us good manners and etiquette, no?"

Jungwon nodded at his words. He stole a glance at the other and winked. Jaeyun's eyes flashed with confusion at his act, before Jungwon opened his mouth, "I cannot deny it, no. I think everyone should, at least for a short while, have a governess. They impact on a pups learning so much", Jungwon says, smiling at the mother.

Mrs. Nishimura looks down, "Riki has been talking about a governess for a while now. I am not certain where he heard that phrase from, however he wishes one", she says, stealing a glance at the boy. Jaeyun doesn't know how to react. What is Jungwon doing?

"Oh, well then he shall have one! My brother here is one and currently is not watching over or teaching any pups!" Jungwon says smiling, looking back at Jaeyun.

When has Jungwon entered the confines of his mind? When has his youngest brother started reading him like an open book? Jaeyun's mind briefly goes over their interactions for today and he does not have a single moment where Jungwon and him talk about his job. He himself still isn't sure what he feels. Besides, is it the best idea to leave Iseul now? What if she needs him and he isn't there?

Mrs. Nishimura looks surprised, "Really? I was under the impression you care only for those of age, or in need of physical care", she says, glancing at Jaeyun. Their pace slows down, Jungwon smoothly stepping one step back and pushing his brother next to the mother. Jungwon takes Riki's free hand and they walk like that, still slower then before.

"Ah well", Jaeyun starts, unsure. His eyes meet Jungwon's encouraging ones and he clears his throat, "I have only been a nurse, since I decided to work. However I have always wished of being a governess. That was my first plan before I came across lady Lee", he says, looking down as he talks.

He feels happy and horrible in the same time. He feels like he's cheating on Cho Iseul, even though it sounds crazy. She was his employer now and, isn't what he is doing now considered betrayal? He was not loyal to his work, was he? However, this is what he had always wanted, no?

Mrs. Nishimura seems to find that interesting, "Really? From what I have gathered you have been a wonderful nurse to lady Lee. I would have never guessed that that was not of your profession."

As he was about to say something, he is interrupted by a familiar voice. Not so familiar, actually, but it's still enough for a single tingle to pass through his body, making his cheeks tint a shade darker. God, Lee Heeseung was making him go crazy.

Riki screeches loudly, abandoning the fruit he once held in his hands, and dashing away from Jungwon's hand in his, making his way to the said voice.

Mrs. Nishimura frets again, walking towards the two half-brothers ("Riki, you have to stop running everywhere. You shall get lost!"), before she bows to Lee Heeseung.

Lee Heeseung, ever the gentleman, bows back, Riki still in his hold. He smiles at the mother and extends a hand, "It is so nice to finally meet you. Well, meet you properly, no?"

Mrs. Nishimura hums, "Likewise, Heeseung-shii", she says, smoothing a hand over Riki's cheek. His cheeks must be sticky from the fruit. His hands too. Sir Lee's suit must be covered in sticky little fingerprints by now. Jaeyun can't help but find the thought endearing.

Lee Heeseung steals a glance his way, light smile staying on his face as they meet eyes. He bows with his head, Jaeyun bowing back.

There was something in Lee Heeseung's eyes that made his cheeks heat up even more. Was it the intensity? He doubted it. The look wasn't a stare, it was a mere fleeting glance. 

Maybe it was because the alpha looking at him was Lee Heeseung, the one who stole his heart so many years ago. 

Now, in the lights of the fair, he looks younger, more inexperienced. He looks like a boy with big dreams and big eyes, ready for the world.

Jaeyun crumbles inside a little. What was it about this side of Lee Heeseung, a more care-free side, that made him so nervous?

He hadn't noticed Jungwon's stare, not until a cough was heard from his side and his eyes met Jungwon's.

"I have not known you were familiar with Sir Lee's... family? I am very confused as to who they actually are."

-

Sunghoon was standing close to Sunoo as the omega talked to a vendor. He was getting them a serving of warm pancakes so they could share them together.

There were several soldiers everywhere around here. Their work was near the town, so it was logical for them to be here. It was a way for them to have fun, even if they weren't from this town, like Sunghoon and most of his mates.

He saw a couple of alpha soldiers laughing about and eating something, everyone feeling carefree, even though their job is quite serious.

Sunghoon's attention gets taken away from them to the one next to him, handing him a warm paper plate. He smiles lightly as the other smiles down at the pancakes.

His hair is a little messy from the wind, but it looks great in Sunghoon's eyes. Just perfect. His coat is covering him up well, a thick scarf around his neck (Sunghoon knows him well enough; he gets cold easily), yet his chocolate scent is everywhere around him.

"Should we find a bench or somewhere to sit?" Sunoo asks and Sunghoon hums, pointing to one a few meters away from them.

They walk to the bench with the pancakes in hand, Sunoo already biting a small part of it. Sunghoon watches the wind play with his hair again. He cannot help but feel mesmerized by the movement.

His eyes stay on his hair as they sit down, then trailing to the hand that went up to smooth the mess the wind made. Sunghoon looked at Sunoo's eyes first. His dark eyes were so big, looking at the pancakes with such... Sunghoon couldn't say fondness, he was not fond of the pancakes. But he was... Sunoo appeared so lovely and soft and comfortable and warm right now. Sunghoon did not want to leave this moment.

"How have things been?" Sunoo asks him, fanning a piece of pancake before bringing it to his lips closer. His tongue touches the hot treat and retreats back to his mouth. Seems like the pancakes really are hot. Sunghoon takes one piece too and blows on it.

"Not bad", he says between blows, "We have been practicing more then usual but I do not mind it. If I plan for a higher position, then hard work should be easy, no?" He says, offering his piece to the omega, the omega biting it with a smile.

The younger's eyebrows scrunch, "How is my piece still warm and yours isn't?" He asks lightly and Sunghoon lets out a giggle. What the younger makes him feel and do is simply incredible.

"Have stronger lungs then you maybe", the alpha says, taking another piece, "And you? How are you?"

Sunoo hums, "Your lungs should be stronger then mine. If they weren't that would have been a robbery on your part", he closes his eyes, "Imagine if an inactive omega has stronger lungs then a soldier alpha", he says.

Sunghoon just laughs, watching the other munch on his piece of food.

"And just so you know", the omega tells him, "You shouldn't overwork yourself. Take it step by step, okay?" He says, eyeing the older yet not making eye contact with him.

Sunghoon notices but doesn't say anything about it. Instead, "I'm not overworked. I just happen to fall on more trainings recently. It'll go away once", he says, bringing his piece of pancake to the other's lips. Sunoo opens them and bites the piece, delighted at the taste.

It's silent as Sunoo munches on his food, Sunghoon also taking a bite.

Sunghoon looks at him and notices some little tells he should have noticed before. His left leg is bouncing in a fast rhythm and his right hand is tapping on his thigh in the same pace. His lips get bitten once or twice while he chews on the food and his ears are moving more then usually, making him guess his biting pace is also faster. That, paired with the weird dialog about lungs and pancakes makes him question things.

"You're nervous", the alpha says and Sunoo tenses, stopping both his leg and hand, stopping the chewing and his ears stop twitching. Sunghoon continues, "Or uneasy. Or anxious", he says, eyes squinted and then blown wide, "Am I making you feel that way?"

Sunoo jumps up at his assumption, hands shooting to the other who was about to move away, "No! No, no, no. I love you, you aren't making me feel bad, I feel at peace with you", the omega says and smiles lightly at the other.

Sunghoon relaxes a little before raising an eyebrow, "You do not seem at peace right now", he says, carefully going to grab the other's hand. Once Sunoo does not pull away he grips it tighter, "Would you care to tell me?"

Sunghoon's eyes are so sincere, so soft and so round. So pretty and shiny. Sunoo cannot look away, can he? And Sunoo can never hide from him either.

"Must you always be so good with me?" Sunoo says quietly, looking forward at the various vendors and people buying from them.

Sunghoon's eyes do not turn softer, as Sunoo expected in his head. They turn more stern, "I will always be good to you. Good with you. No matter what happens you need to know you will always have me, in any circumstance. Do not forget that. I will always be with you."

Sunoo did not expect that. He thought the older would laugh and they would maybe talk about the thing Sunoo is so nervous about, but this... All that is in his mind clears way for Sunghoon and his words. His sentences hit deep and right to his heart, his eyes stinging. Before he realizes, Sunghoon is wiping something away from his cheek. Must be a tear since his thumb is so shiny.

He closes his eyes. The pancakes are next to Sunghoon on the bench, safely away from Sunoo who launches himself at the other, hugging him tight.

"Can you promise me that?" Sunoo asks, "Can you promise me that you will always be with me? If not with your body, with your mind?" He asks and shakes lightly as he feels Sunghoon's breath on his neck.

Sunghoon hugs him tighter, "Always. Whatever happens to me you will always be at the top of my mind. You are my priority, okay?" He says, looking at the back of Sunoo's neck. He smooths a hand over his nape and taps it gently.

They pull away and Sunoo starts to wipe his face clean of his tears. He is stopped by the older boy, giving him a handkerchief. He laughs, "Such a gentleman", Sunoo says and Sunghoon laughs. 

Their hands stay intertwined as Sunoo wipes his face with his free hand, eyes looking at their hands, so pretty together. Both of them were quite fair (come to think of it, Sunoo was the only one out of the three brothers that took over his father's complexion; Jungwon and Jaeyun were not as pale, similar to their mother), and their hands seemed to glow between them.

Sunghoon's thumb was circling over the back of Sunoo's palm and it made him so calm he almost forgot what he wanted to tell him. About his worries.

"About the nervousness", he starts, clearing his throat and setting the handkerchief to the side.

Sunghoon begins, "If you do not wish to tell me, you do not need to. Know that you always can and always will be able to, but it is not what I ask of you. You need to feel comfortable sharing it with me."

Sunoo's heart warms.

"I want to tell you this. Out of my sheer will", he says, grabbing Sunghoon's hand with both of his, "I..." He starts, a little nervous, "I am worried. About you. You mentioned a war. I do not wish for you to get hurt. Or, god forbid, something worse", he says and Sunghoon exhales.

It is quiet, so Sunoo takes it as a sign to continue, "And I know you will tell me not to worry. That you will take care of yourself. But I cannot help but do so. And not just for you, it-" He exhales and inhales sharply, his heart hurting, "Jungwon. I am not worried about General Park, however I am about Jungwon. He will kill himself with worry and... He never talks about it."

Sunghoon stays quiet for a second longer, before he gently lifts the other's face, so to face his own, not their hands.

He smiles gently, "You worry about me and not about the general? You do not trust in my abilities?"

It's a weak, weak attempt at making Sunoo smile, yet he somehow does just that. The younger groans and hits him on the arm lightly.

"Do not worry, dearest", Sunghoon starts, taking the younger's hands in his, "I will always be careful. In the field and here. Your worry is without a goal since I am skilled and good at my job", he says, kissing the back of Sunoo's palms.

It's quiet for a second. Before, "Promise me you'll take care", he tells him, "And you'll be healthy and good. Alright?"

Sunghoon nods. He feeds the younger a piece of pancake and the two giggle as the sauce gets all around Sunoo's lips.

As soon as Sunghoon swipes a finger over his bottom lip, there is a commotion.

A sea of red-clad men rush to the exit of the town, all running to catch up.

One catches Sunghoon's attention as one of the mates in his clique.

They look at each other and the alpha slows down, breathing heavily by their side. Sunghoon stands up to help him, but the man swats at his hands.

"Sunghoon-ah", he says, eyes wide and big, "War is in front of us."

It's like they invoked this, is it not?

-

Chapter Text

Dearest Iseul,

Due to the commotions happening in our town and the surrounding land, I must stay in town, making me unable to leave to your estate.  Meaning , we will not be able to see each other for some time.

However, in that time, do write to me. Ask me anything you wish to know or wish to confirm. I shall look forward to your letters.

Furthermore, should you feel ill, I advise nurse Kwan to look after you. I have had plenty of talks with her,  and she seems educated enough to help you.

I sincerely apologize for the circumstances , however ,  I  cannot  change them, leaving me to abide by the protocol received by the army itself: to stay inside the confines of the town.

I shall be looking into sending this via fast mail, with which I hope this reaches you well.

Your dearest,

Nurse Sim

-

While speaking of the war, it is important to say that what is happening is away from their town.

The land which the battle has taken place in is farther to the north. However, the safety of their town, it is important that the civilians and villagers do not get near the area or outside their town's borders.

It is safer. If you were to be on the road out of town, you were singled out and, with that, an easy target. Hence, no leaving of the town's territory is permitted.

Jaeyun was aware of that. That is why he could no longer work for the Cho family. For now. Until the end of battle.

That could be in days' time, weeks, months... He hopes not years. In the meanwhile, he was occupied with his family: two omegas which have their alphas in battle, a worried set of parents, and a dog with no friend.

Jaeyun was used to taking care of others. That is why he decided that a governess would be a good position to work under (and later, nurse). He could care for lady Lee just fine. She didn't need much: lunch served, a hand while walking, a pillow adjusted. Most of the time, he was here just to pass her time, talking her ears off about nonsense. As did she, talk to him about old tales and stories.

Iseul has not given him a proper job to do.

He is with her most of his days, watching over her, making her smile, making her laugh. With that, he needed to be familiar with the medicine she used and took. If by any chance something were to happen, he should help her. With that, also came her regular medication: a few drops of this oil in her water after lunch, a white pill around 5 in the afternoon, a green one right before she decided to sleep.

He was that kind of caretaker. They would talk mostly of unimportant business. Sometimes about her childhood, sometimes about his. Sometimes, about their dogs. Sometimes about their tastes in dresses and fabrics. Sometimes about tea.

Really, no serious theme ever crossed over them. It was just banter, silly small talk that evolved into even sillier talks. It was never grave matters they talked about, nothing important.

That is why now, with Sunoo's sad face and Jungwon's fake neutral expression, he finds it hard to handle.

Sunoo's last moment with the sergeant was right when the battle started and the soldiers started leaving the town. Sunghoon looked from the man who briefed him on what was happening to Sunoo, the omega's eyes blown wide. Sunghoon kissed his forehead so gently, 'Do not worry. I'll be back.'

Jungwon's last interaction was long ago. However, his last received letter was the day before the fair.

And he has not heard of him since.

So, naturally, both of them were rather sad.

By rather sad, Jaeyun means that Sunoo has not stopped crying for the better half of a week, and Jungwon has been keeping to himself a lot, which was never good.

Jaeyun has to be creative in his ways of reassurance.

At the moment, he is kneeling in their garden, snipping away at the mint stems.

They had always had a small mint garden in their backyard. It was on a little hill, a bit higher then the rest of their plants. Their mother loved putting mint in drinks. From tea to something more refreshing. And now, it serves as an even better distraction for Sunoo.

The younger sniffs at the small leaves, rubbing them in between their fingers.

"I think our scents suit us", Sunoo says, after a few minutes of silence, "Suit one another too."

Jaeyun hums, "I noticed. You also seem to quite like mint chocolate. So I would only presume", he says, smiling lightly.

Sunoo sighs, "It is a rather refreshing match, don't you think?" He asks, putting some more stems into the basket in between them.

Jaeyun nods, "I would have to agree on that", he says, "Your scent can be quite heavy and sweet, and his balances it out."

It is quiet for a mere second before a sigh leaves Sunoo's lips again, "I feel so helpless!" He whines, "I cannot think of anything but his wellbeing! Even this - I do it to remind myself of him!"

Jaeyun's eyebrows furrow, "What might you mean?"

Sunoo whines in his hands, "How am I to stay at home while he is in battle?" He says, lowering his hands, "As in, how will I endure this on a regular? If..." He steals a glance towards their house, "If we are to wed, how will I be able to stay behind? I worry so much."

Jaeyun smiles, "Already such thoughts and it has not been over a week? You must be the worst military omega out there, no?" He says with a laugh as Sunoo whines again.

"Now you are just being mean!" He yells out and is about to stand up, but Jaeyun grabs him by his wrists and stops him from moving further.

"It was a silly joke. Do not think ill of it", Jaeyun says, eyes sorry, "I was just trying to brighten you up a bit", he says.

Sunoo looks away, "I know", he says, "But it really does bother me. I would prefer it if you would be serious", he says and Jaeyun nods, eyes downcast.

The brothers were always very vocal about their feelings with each other. Sunoo and Jaeyun especially. Sunoo was a sensitive soul and Jaeyun was very open about his emotions so his younger brothers would learn from him. Jungwon was a little bit closeted about his emotions and feelings but once he grasps them in his own mind, he will talk to the two.

"Thank you for telling me so, Sunoo", he says, clearing his throat, "I sincerely apologize for hurting you. It was not my intention", he smiles lightly as the other laughs and then whines in his palms again.

Sunoo was doing rather much of that as of lately.

"I apologize as well", he says, "I understand it was not of ill intentions. However, I feel as if that will only make me cry", he sighs, looking at his brother.

Jaeyun smiles.

These little fights, as to call them, have been happening over the week. More so with Sunoo than with Jungwon.

Jaeyun was between his two younger brothers at all time. With Sunoo when he woke up yesterday, with Jungwon before lunch. With Jungwon after breakfast today, with Sunoo after dinner. Really, it was mostly days spent caring for his brothers.

He really is digging his own grave. By grave he means duty. By duty he means care. And by care he means a nurse.

He understands that a governess is also there to care for a pup, however they are to teach. Moreover, teaching is their primary profession. And Jaeyun would really love to do just that.

"You and sergeant Park will one day marry", he starts, his hands holding Sunoo's ones. They have moved from the mint garden to a bench right in front of it, "And have a family. I am certain of that."

Sunoo just nods, letting the other continue.

"Your pups will be healthy and grow into beautiful and smart people. And in that same time where they will grow to become so, you will be there, by their side, guiding them. You will be there, sometimes with Sunghoon, sometimes alone. Being an omega of a military figure is like that. But know that with time, it will get much better."

Sunoo looks like he wants to say something else but he quickly shuts down when the older squeezes at his wrists a bit firmer.

"I am not just telling you this. I know of this. You will feel lonely sometimes, but through time you will have your children that will remind you of sergeant Park and of your love. And besides, once he is promoted from sergeant, he will have more work, yes, but work that can be done at home. With you close. Do not worry."

Sunoo sighs again, nodding. Jaeyun is smoothing his thumbs over the back of Sunoo's hands.

Jaeyun wishes that for once, Sunoo sees there is no reason to worry. He sees it in his face, he is riddled with thoughts that affect him too much.

"Sunoo", Jaeyun starts, "You cannot worry over something you cannot control", he tells him and Sunoo nods.

"I know, I know. Father always says so. But I cannot help but be worried! I... I do not know if he is... alive", Sunoo's words quiet at the end and his eyes close.

Jaeyun really needs to find something to cheer him up. Soon.

"Do not think like that", Jaeyun says, "As far as I am concerned, Sunghoon is alive and well. You do not know what is happening. Do not think such bad thoughts when they might not be true. Do you promise?"

Sunoo, after a minute of quiet time, nods.

"That is the same thing sergeant Park told me before he left. That I shall not worry. But I really cannot help myself, I-"

He is interrupted by his older brother, "Alright that is enough", he says, standing up, "We are going to the town's library tomorrow and we are getting you a book about worrying! End of story!"

Jaeyun pulls the other up on his feet and drags him inside. The younger returns to the garden in a second, plucking a fresh mint stem and scenting it. He presses it into his palm.

All will be well, no?

-

Somehow, they get Jungwon to get out of their house as well, the three brothers walking side by side on the pavement.

Their town has not as many people on the streets as usual. Partially because the soldiers that reside here are not present, and partially because some people are still scared to leave their home. Even though their danger is heightened, it is quite alright to walk their town. Nothing dangerous can really happen here.

"A fine weather", Jungwon comments, "Shame those men have to fight on such a fine day."

Jaeyun felt like being caught between two flames that suffer. He is trying to stay positive but at the end of the day one of them will tell him something that will send him into a scary world of dreams.

"We are but a few steps away from the library", he says, cutting whatever Sunoo would have said if it weren't for him.

Jaeyun enters first, after him Sunoo, after Sunoo goes Jungwon. The youngest has been taken by slight fatigue ever since the war had taken place. Their mother worried if it was something serious, but Jungwon assured her he was fine and successfully dodged a doctor's visit.

Despite that, he is still constantly tired and drained of energy. Jaeyun cannot think of what the letters they exchanged had written in them that have Jungwon longing for him so much.

"Ah, the Sims!" The librarian, kind mr. Shin, offered them a light smile. He was an omega, one of the first ones that started working in this library. Jaeyun likes him because sometimes he gives him good discounts for some books.

The three bow, Sunoo and Jaeyun lightly smiling.

"We are in search of some reading material", Jaeyun fills in the silence, "We do not need help, as of now. Might we alert you if we do?"

Mr. Shin smiled, "Of course. You know the layout of the library. Choose as you may."

While Jaeyun sent Sunoo to walk in the direction of a far left corner, he took Jungwon by his arm, interlacing it with his own, and patting his hand over the back of Jungwon's palm.

"I am quite certain Sunoo is riddled with worry. You, however, have something else lying underneath your facade", he says, walking in tandem with the other.

"I do not know of what you are talking about", Jungwon starts, meeting eyes with his eldest brother. Jaeyun looks at him with utmost uncertainty. He looks away from the other before quietly confessing, "I do not wish to speak of it."

Jaeyun chuckles, "If it were anything else, I would have let it go. I would have given you time. But now, you look like you are hurting yourself far too much. Say it or I will have to force it out of you", the older says, raising an eyebrow.

Jungwon clears his throat.

"It is a private matter-"

"I am your brother! Nothing is private to me!"

"My feelings are not to be discussed in a public place-"

"Oh! You", he drags the younger by his hand to a corner of the library. A lone table residing by the small window. It is a familiar place for Jaeyun, served him refuge once he needed.

He pulls out a chair and sits Jungwon on it, going to sit on the other chair by the table. There is hardly any people around them, only a pair of ladies giggling about, somewhere in one of the rows of the books near them.

"Speak now", Jaeyun tells him, "You must tell me what is bothering you. This seems to be taking all your energy and I do not like that!"

Jungwon sighs. He looks around and sees two ladies in a corner of the library. They still are too far away to hear them.

"I am betrothed to a general", he starts, "And his job must be serious, right? I am under the impression if there is someone who is responsible there, it is their general, no?"

Jaeyun hums. Jungwon takes it as a sign to continue.

"If there would be someone that could be targeted, it certainly would be someone of higher ground. Such as a general", he says and stops to look at the other.

When Jaeyun goes to say something, Jungwon interrupts him, "Now. Next to the obvious amount of worry I am under, I am also... I feel rather guilt ridden."

Jaeyun's eyebrows scrunch, "What for? What could possibly cause you guilt?"

Jungwon sighs, "I have... I am his future omega and I", he stops and bites his lower lip, "I have not expressed any care for him or anything of that matter to him. I have told him I am 'looking forward to seeing him' or 'awaiting his arrival' but, as of far, that is it. If he were to", die he doesn't say and swallows, meeting eyes with Jaeyun. The older nods, telling him he understands and to continue, "Then he would not know of my... affections. And I am especially guilt ridden because is that not selfish? Those kind of thoughts?"

Jaeyun smiles gently at his youngest brother. Jungwon was not one to show love. He showed attention, of course. Showed that he was listening and paying attention. But he never outright made his feelings clear to most people. He hugged his brothers, yes, he showed them how much he loved them. But to others, it was a difficult task for the younger.

Jaeyun hums, "I am quite sure he will come back and you will have time to tell him how much you care", Jaeyun assures him, "And I am sure the general is aware of at least a portion of your affections, no? He would not have continued to write to you, would he?"

Jungwon is quiet for a minute. His fingers fidget with his dress, small intricate flowers lining his sleeves. His fingers trace around them as he sighs. He looks up at Jaeyun, "I suppose that is right. However, I feel as if he might think it is one sided? He always shows how he cares so much and I-"

"And you have your own way of showing that love", Sunoo's voice interrupts them. They both look at him and his smiling face. He looks so gentle, so soft and comfortable, "Your worry is in vain, Jungwon-ah. I am sure he understands you aren't the type to make your feelings clear upon first meeting."

Sunoo goes to sit on one of the empty seats and puts three books on the table. He leans his elbow on the surface in front of him as his free hand goes to touch Jungwon's that is in his lap. Their eyes meet. Jungwon's big ones are staring at the other's gentle face with furrowed brows. Sunoo just smiles more.

"He knows you", Sunoo speaks, "However much you like to deny everything, he knows you. From your letters and your writing. He understands you, Jungwonie."

Jaeyun is looking at the two with sad but adoring eyes. His two younger brothers looked so grown up. His Sunoo who has just shown a brave face and his Jungwon who just faced his feelings.

He clears his throat as to get the attention of the two. They look at him and his relaxed posture. He is leaning back in his chair, eyeing the books on the table, "So Sunoo", he starts, "Have you found a book on how to lessen your worries?"

Sunoo giggled lightly, "No", he speaks up, "But I have found a book on gardening! It looks interesting! And also one on flowers and their meaning! I shall borrow them, no?"

Jaeyun hums, "Good. I am glad you found something of interest to you. Shall we go, then?" He asks and the two nod, all of them standing up to go and walk to the exit.

Jaeyun is looking around. The books are divided in sections, with the genre being the divider. He looks from romance novels to history books. He steals a glance at the thriller section and quickly looks away. He tried reading thrillers once but his mind would not be put to rest for the remaining of the month after reading it. Really, he should not be reading scary books.

He looks at the poetry section and notices a person standing there, presumably engrossed in some kind of thin book, dark blue covers encasing the writing. He squints to see what is written on the cover, however he is unable to see what the gold letters are meant to be saying.

He looks up and stops in place once his eyes land on the face of the person.

He sniffs the air a little, careful not to appear as doing so, just so a gust of patchouli comes to his nose. It is still mixed with a slight undertone of paint and painting materials.

He thinks of going out with his brothers, not bothering to talk to the other or even acknowledge his presence, leaving the library with a full mind of 'what if's and a nose full of patchouli. He has half a mind to dismiss his thoughts when he decides that no, he shall be brave today.

He has not seen the other since the fair took place, his last memory of him being him walking away with Riki and his mother, talking animatedly. He wonders how they returned home. And what of that meeting? He is aware the alpha is not on good terms with his mother.

He casts a glance at Jungwon walking in front of him, "You go home, I'll return later", he says and smiles as the younger first furrows his brows, then looks around, then smirks, then nods.

Jungwon walks away and towards Sunoo who is standing in front of mr. Shin. He casts one last glance Jaeyun's way and winks at him, the older rolling his eyes.

Jaeyun turns to the poetry section, walking to it before stopping. What even is he going to say to Lee Heeseung once he was close enough. Oh, no. This was a bad idea, wasn't it? This will just turn into another awkward conversation. Not that their previous ones were awkward but-

He stills when the alpha turns to look at him, their eyes meeting. The alpha's eyes were a little glassy, as if he was deep in thought. Maybe he shouldn't have come to him. If he was thinking about something, probably something related to art, what if he interrupted him? That was the last thing he wanted to do.

Alas, Lee Heeseung smiles gently, the glassy look in his eyes disappearing soon after. He closes the book and walks closer to Jaeyun, not too close, but a few steps away.

"Jaeyun-shii", it sounded so sweet coming from the alpha, "So lovely seeing you. How have you been? We have not seen each other since... the fair, no?" He says, smiling lightly.

Jaeyun quickly clears his mind and smiles gently, "That is right, yes. I have been alright", he says, clearing his throat. He has a desire to share more with the other, but he is sure he would not be that welcomed. He settles on something that is not too revealing, "My brothers both have... someone in the battle at the moment, so I have been with them more."

Heeseung hums, "Ah, yes. I have seen your youngest brother with the general, no?" He asks and Jaeyun hums affirmatively.

"Yes, that is right. And my other brother... he has certain relations to a sergeant. So it has been a full house since then", he smiles. Just the thought of his two brothers never fails to adorn him with happy thoughts.

Heeseung seems to contemplate on his next words, as if choosing if what he is about to ask is too intruding or not. He decides to say it eventually, "And you? How have you been coping with everything?"

Jaeyun looks down a second before meeting the other's eyes. He feels as if the alpha is cautious while talking to him. He does not know why. He clears his throat to speak again, "I suppose alright. I have not been working since the Cho estate is out of town and I am unable to visit. So I have been tending to my brothers most of the time. Healing wounded hearts, no?"

He smiles at the other as he asks that, the other giving him a sad smile.

"It sounds like your hands are full", he says, "I was about to offer a walk through town, however if you have too much to do, then another time", the alpha smiles bittersweetly and Jaeyun is taken aback by his request. Was it a request? A suggestion, perhaps.

Jaeyun, before he can think about it, says, "I would not mind a walk. It would clear my head, I think", he says, smiling. He hits himself mentally. Does he appear too eager? Is Heeseung looking down on him now? And if no, what will happen on their walk? Oh, no. What has he put himself into?

Heeseung smiles, momentarily soothing his thoughts, "Lovely", he says before gesturing to the book in his hands, "I shall just borrow this and we shall be on our way, no?"

Jaeyun nods before asking, "What is it about, might I ask?"

Heeseung starts walking towards mr. Shin before starting to talk, "Nothing much. Poetry sometimes gives me inspiration to paint when I run out of ideas. Or rather, it gets me out of the block I sometimes have in my mind that stops me from painting. Sometimes, when you do too much of only one thing, you have to break it and do something different. So your mind does not get bored."

Jaeyun hums as they make their way to mr. Shin. He glances at the man in front of them and smiles at him, the other smiling back. He averts his eyes back to the alpha, "Does that happen often to you? The blocks you were talking about?"

The alpha gets the book back from mr. Shin and faces the other, "Not too often. Sometimes it's prompted by something", they go to the door of the library and exit, a shiver running down Jaeyun's back at the sudden cold air, "Now, I think it is because I am finally settled in, so to say."

Jaeyun looks up at that, "How so?" He sounds genuinely curious. And he is. He has never had a real conversation with a artist. And Heeseung is one, no?

"Well for one, I have a place to stay at. One that is really mine, not somebody else's and I am just staying the night, or a few, there", he starts, looking from Jaeyun to in front of them. They weren't really walking anywhere, wherever their feet bring them. Maybe a park? "After my aunt died, I had this spur of inspiration. It has only once ever been as great as this one. And then after it died down, I had lost any motivation."

Jaeyun furrowed his brows, "Grief makes you want to paint?" He asks. Maybe he is being too nosy. Maybe Lee Heeseung would not feel so comfortable answering his questions. However, he is not thinking with his head now. His mouth speaks for itself.

"A strong one at that", Heeseung supplies, not minding Jaeyun's inquiries, "Most artists would say grief is the strongest initiator for art. Pain makes you feel everything differently", he goes on, "I have not felt it before, this is my first time dealing with such grief. And it really is strong."

Jaeyun hums, now in thought, "What else makes you want to paint?"

Heeseung looks at him for a moment before looking in front of them, "Love, I suppose. Infatuation. I have rarely felt that way, so I can only presume."

Jaeyun nods. he looks up and sees they are headed to one of the parks in the area. If he would have taken Layla with him she would have loved it. Lately she had been walked by their maids, since his brothers aren't in the right mind and his hands are full with... well, his brothers.

"You said you felt the same surge to paint only once before?" He said, looking up towards the other. It was not shaped like a question but it was one, clear from his tone and look that he gave the alpha.

The alpha stares at him for a moment, eyes meeting eyes. The alpha looks soft now, his dark eyes seem to almost resemble those of a deer (Jaeyun's mind wants to say he looks quite charming, however that is where his mouth draws the line of uttering words). His mind imprints the picture on the backs of his eyelids. God, he really feels too much for this alpha.

The eye contact is broken by the alpha, his eyes casting down for a moment before traveling up and looking at one of the parks where they were now headed.

"I was young. It was", he sighs, "I would not say it was out of love, but perhaps out of affection. It was then shortly after followed by a pretty severe moment in my life, so I would say it was quite turbulent then."

Jaeyun hums. They are now walking through the park, mostly observing people around them. He turns to look at the alpha, "And how does poetry help?"

At this point, he just wanted to keep talking to the other. He remembered, somewhere in the back of his mind, that he should also ask him how Riki and his mother got home on the day of the fair.

"It's a form of art that lacks a visual representation", he explains and Jaeyun nods slowly, "Just remember any time when you were reading, you were imagining those situations in your head, no? Well, poetry is very picturesque and full of metaphors, so sometimes it just makes it easier to think about something that already exists and trying to picture it in a more visual display of art."

Jaeyun nods again. He feels like Heeseung really does know art well, and for what it is worth, he seems to be applying it, "Who might have thought you that? You sound so professional", he says in an attempt at a joke.

And Heeseung finds it as such, a gentle smile adorning his features, "Well I am one, am I not? It is my work, my calling. I may not make the most income, however I live happy knowing that what I do is art", he smiles.

Jaeyun feels as if talking to the alpha so carefreely sounds at least a little bit improper, since they had not talked like that mere minutes ago, however he does not mind.

"Do you sell your art, Heeseung-shii?" The omega asks, glancing at a maid walking a dog on a leash. The dog seems happy frolicking about. He is reminded again of the war happening outside of these imaginary town walls. He feels guilty for a mere moment before wiping that feeling away and smiling. He could not do anything for those there, if he could, then he would've felt guilty. He needed to stop.

"Some I do", he starts, "If there is a potential buyer, I shall give the painting to him if it is not dear to me. If it is, I try to make them buy some other of my works", he says, nodding his head.

It was silent for a moment before Jaeyun spoke up, "That night of the fair", he looked up at the alpha, the alpha meeting his eyes, "How have mrs. Nishimura and her son returned back home? I am under the impression they live far away from town."

Lee Heeseung hums, "They do live outside of town, but not that far away. They went back as soon as they could once they found out. As far as I know, they arrived home safely", he says, looking from Jaeyun to his feet.

Jaeyun hums. He had been thinking about that. Maybe a part of his brain automatically thinks of how his journey would be to their home, maybe because he did indulge into the thought of being a governess.

He had to be honest and say he had thought about it. When Sunoo and Jungwon were doing alright, and did not need tending to, or anything else, he would think of it. Think of the possibility of working for someone who would want him to take care of their pups. To teach them and tend to them.

Heeseung speaks up, "Mrs. Nishimura and I... She contacted me through my aunt, a year or two ago. We have been sending each other letters occasionally. Mainly about her son."

Jaeyun was not sure why he was the one hearing this, but he will listen and pay attention, for he is curious as to how they know one another truly. That is why he only hums and lets the alpha talk.

"Riki did not know of me before. And she, mrs. Nishimura that is, thought that it would be selfish not to introduce us. Her words, not mine. And she had let me visit him once, a few months ago when I was near here. That is how I got to know him, without my mother knowing."

Jaeyun hums, "How had that run about? How had your mother not noticed you?" He asks, interested in what he will say.

Heeseung starts, "They were out of town for a trip, so their maids were looking after Riki. Mrs. Nishimura let them know I would be coming so even a warm bed was ready. I did not stay for long. Only a night. After that I also visited once, although that was risky. My mother was at their home, and I got in through a window."

Jaeyun looks at the other, "Through a window?" Jaeyun asks, eyes wide, "That appears to be quite scandalous, Heeseung-shii", he says, eyes meeting the other's. They are playful and fun. Joyful.

"I thought: I must not be seen by my mother. For that reason I sneaked into Riki's room late one night and we talked until early hours of the next morning. I later sent mrs. Nishimura a letter, explaining myself. She only told me to be careful", he says, smiling at the other.

Jaeyun smiles back, a light blush adorning his cheeks. He just feels so warm talking to the other. He flutters his eyes closed for a moment. He is enjoying their time like this, walking and talking. He would wish there were some form of physical contact between the two, however he would not indulge himself. An unmated omega walking with an unmated alpha already gains enough suspicion.

He briefly looks around again. No one is looking at them but he feels their eyes. No one is directly eyeing them, however he feels jabs being thrown in his direction. Maybe not jabs that were meant to hurt, more so that they were made to, perhaps, make them aware of the stares. To watch out for anything to happen.

He is well aware that high class omegas of their town have been talking about him. He is unmated, unmarried and without a child. At his age, that is frowned upon. And once he declared he wanted to start working, he almost felt everyone stare down at him.

Except for his own family and the kind lady Lee. 

"Have you visited lady Lee once you were with young Riki?" He asked, opening his eyes. Curiosity got the best of him and he could not shut his mouth now.

He thought about how the alpha could have been in town after their first meeting and he could've bumped into him. Maybe even talked to him. His heart skips a beat for the nth time while talking to the alpha. He feels so hopeless with his feeling. He thinks he might not be in love, however he likes the alpha, that much he can admit to himself. However, his feeling still are very strong.

"I have. Both times. And both times I slept over at my aunts place. It was pleasant seeing her after so long. Though she kicked me out the next morning both times. She knew I was not there to stay", the alpha says, smile evident on his face. His smile is warm but his eyes are distant. Jaeyun can only assume part of it is the pain.

Suddenly he is hit with an urge to comfort the alpha at the thought of his aunt. His mind supplies that he was the one to mention lady Lee, however he pushes it down in favor of helping the alpha.

"She must have known you so well for her to be so selfless and prioritize your job", he says clearing his throat, "If I were in her place, finally being able to see my nephew after such a while, I would have talked you into staying."

He watches the alpha take a breath in and meet his eyes. He smiles gently, "She was really selfless, yes. But always witty and silly. She really was one of my favorite people in the world."

Jaeyun smiles up at the other before looking to the front. He feels as if talking to Lee Heeseung makes him both in need of their further contact and the space in between them widening. His feelings will be the death of him.

-

Their mother has always been a bit more uptight than their father. 

She and her brother have been raised to prioritize discipline and hard work over creativity and imagination. Even as two omegas. 

She often told stories about how their governess was strict with them, making them respect good manners and rules. It was always something she felt passionate about with her own children. 

As soon as they sat at the table before dinner, she would correct Sunoo for putting his elbows on the table, or to Jungwon for starting the meal before their prayers, or to Jaeyun not putting his napkin the right way. She was adamant to make well mannered children. 

Their father did not oppose to that. He was an easy going man and he was sure his wife knew her boundaries, when to stop and when to push. So he rarely interfered with her antics. 

When they decided that they were in need of money, the first parent who made a decision to marry off one of their children was their mother. Their father was the one to carry the final verdict, yes, but their mother put the idea in his head. 

At first, their mother suggested to find someone for Jaeyun, someone who would take him under their wing and care for him and with that, give their family some fortune. However, their father swiftly declined, claiming that Jaeyun is old enough to be in charge of his own destiny, and it would possibly harm him more than do him good. 

After him, her next suggestion was Sunoo. He was lovable and gentle when needed, he just had a wild side. Their mother never claimed that the wild needed to be tamed, just complemented nicely. Their father took that into consideration and went to ask Sunoo about his thoughts. Sunoo declined strongly and with vigor, claiming that such a thing would strip him of his freedom of choice. 

While he was right, they still needed to secure some money. Then, their mother suggested her youngest, dearest son: Jungwon. 

He was so little, so frail. In her eyes, he was still nothing but a little tiny boy, looking at her with his big eyes, asking her about why the world looked this way. But he was the only one left. 

To both their surprises, to their offer, Jungwon thought about it for not longer than a second before gently nodding his head. 

Their third child, third son, third omega, so willing to go with his parents' wishes, had then been engaged and betrothed at a young age of 14. And to someone he did not even know.

At first, it made their mother worry. What if he agreed to it just to please them? Well, that most certainly was a part of it, but they made sure he had a way out. But young Jungwon only nodded his head again, agreeing to their agreement. 

Their father was glad, but also wary. What if what he did made his children miserable and sad? That is the last thing he wants to do. To make them suffer because of their ill situation right now.

What both of them didn't know was that Jungwon was a gentle soul that was crafted, more by their governess than their parents, to be a rule follower and to tame in his imagination and freedom. 

Their governess also always jabbed at Jungwon's weak spots. His thin arms and thin face. He was short for his age, not minding that he was an omega. 

He always got the biggest portions of food, some he could not even finish. Just to 'put some meat on his bones'. It made him insecure and unwanted. Two main reasons why Jungwon agreed to the ordeal so soon, seemingly without a second thought. 

He wanted to be loved, cherished, cared for. And in dire situations like these ones, he chose to take dire leads. 

On one rainy, rainy afternoon in their town, his feelings got the best of him after reading the - then - colonel's letter. The letter was nothing much, just how he wished he had had siblings growing up, who would've supported him and kept him company. 

Something so raw in that letter made Jungwon, then only a month shy of 16, write a lengthy letter to his betrothed. About his insecurities and weak spots. How he wishes he was more like Jaeyun, not shaped into obedience but born into it, or like Sunoo, so gentle (when asked) it made their mother proud. He wishes their governess never doubted him and his body, made him insecure about his body and well being, or, how she oh so many times mentioned, how he will be too weak to carry his own pups in the future. 

At first it was awkward, waiting a whole week for a reply seemed dreadful. His betrothed, who he never met in real life, was about to hear more about him, and with that abandon him. Their family will be in debt to his one. He will never feel the warm feeling of romantic love in his stomach, because he ruined everything. He ruined everything with his stupid insecurities and thoughts and he reprimanded himself for it for the whole week.

However, when the letter arrived, Jungwon was swarmed with feelings of joy, happiness and, most of all, love. 

The alpha wrote to him how he feels glad the omega was comfortable enough to write to him about his worries and how he feels honored to know more about him. He writes how he wishes he were there physically to serve him comfort, how he should never doubt himself in that way. 

He said some things that revisit Jungwon's mind every once in a while, while he is either judging himself or thinking a bit too long about some things. 

Park Jongseong told him that his body is the only one that Jungwon will ever have, and he should cherish it as best as he could. The alpha told him he would still like him, however he looked like and that he will always listen to him and his worries. 

He also told him that everyone who made him doubt he was perfect the way he is should look at themselves first, before judging the ones next to them. 

It has become one of Jungwon's many rules, but this one was his own, nobody else's. Because this one made him feel good and safe and protected. 

After that letter, both of them grew just a tad bit closer, as close as they can get through letters. Jungwon started sharing some more of the things that bothered him, as well as Jongseong started sharing some of his feelings.

He felt so giddy talking to the other. From 'Jungwon-shii' to 'my dearest'. From 'Jongseong-shii' to 'hyung'. Their rising was slow but steady. Never too much, never too little.

Their letters were always full of affection and support. And they were consistent.

These last few weeks were not. And Jungwon could not help but lose his mind over the alpha's whereabouts.

He does not know anything about the person that, aside from his brothers, knows most about him and his omega. He cannot think about the other without a stray tear leaving his eye. He wants to be strong, however he feels weak at the thought of losing the other. 

And with that losing him without the alpha knowing how much he means to him. It kills him inside to think of their end possibly being so near. And ending without a final goodbye. He feels sick to his stomach while thinking of it. 

Nevertheless, his mind still supplies him with positive thoughts. How the other will return. How they will resume writing letters. Jungwon's mind is trying to force the dark thoughts out of his mind, but they are hard to remove, stuck to his scull like glue. 

He needs a distraction, that is certain. 

So, he helps Sunoo with planting, not just mint stems but also other flowers, Daffodils, Roses, Honeysuckles, Lilies,... He still thinks about him, but less.

That is why the biggest curious smile adorns his lips once he opens the door to their manor, Jaeyun and Sunoo in tow.

"Hello, Sir Cho", Jungwon greets, a surprised look in his eyes as he bows. He senses the alpha bow as well before hearing a gasp behind him. Once he looks back he is met with a similarly curious Sunoo and a very, very surprised Jaeyun.

"Sir Cho!" Jaeyun bows, "It is", he gulps, eyebrows scrunching, "The war is at it's wake, we were advised from travelling along the roads. You", he looks at his two brothers staring in wonder, "You should not be here. For your own sake."

The alpha only shrugs, "I had to make sure you were alright", he says and Jungwon and Sunoo steal a glance at one another. They look back at the two at the door, the alpha speaking up, "Since letters could not be sent."

Jaeyun feels heat in his face. He feels warm and red in the face. This wasn't the evening he was hoping for.

Chapter Text

Their parents were well respected in their town.

Their father was the first mayor (and he became such with the help of their mother), and he secured many positions and places in power for many people in the town.

Then, when the town decided to rename someone else to be the mayor, the Sim family found themselves in a bit of debt. Not really, they still could survive, but they needed to do something to save them from drowning in shame.

And to help them maintain their presence and status in town.

The Sims were the ones to establish so many things in their town that it would be such a shame on their name to let them fall as such.

And that wouldn't drag just them. It would also drag their three omega sons with them. And their mother could not allow that.

Her first plan was to marry off one of the three omegas.

It wasn't the most humane, she herself agrees on that, but it was what she had to do.

And if they found a suitor of a high value, they did not have to pay them anything, they would just be receiving money.

The conversation behind that decision went a little bit like this:

It was a calm night outside, but inside their home, there were Jasmin and Chili bouncing off of each wall, the scents refusing to mix together.

A quarrel.

"I cannot let us ruin Jaeyun with this proposal," their father said, sitting sternly on his work chair in his study.

His wife was sitting in front of him, not as calm to the eye as the alpha.

"We have no other choice," she says, "We cannot start discharging our help, our maids and servants. Everyone would know of that. It would be a scandal!"

Their father sighed, "Is that all that you care about? Our place in society?"

"Dearest," their mother starts, voice cold, "I care about my three sons and their future. I care a tad too much, don't you think? That's why if word of this lack of income gets out, none of them will be able to marry anyone. None of them will be able to live happy."

Their father sighed. However stupid this sounded, it made sense.

But he cannot put Jaeyun in that position. That much he told his omega.

The omega sighed, "Why are you shielding him? He needs no shielding. He is old enough to marry tomorrow. Money would come easiest if we marry Jaeyun off."

Their father shakes his head, "Jaeyun has been rejecting every nice alpha that stepped on our doorstep. Every single one, since he was fifteen. I believe he will not be of much excitement in a marriage."

It was quiet. Too quiet. He looked up and met the body of his wife, tense and pent up. She isn't looking at him. She is looking down at her lap, fidgeting with the ring on her finger.

"Do you think," his wife starts clearing her throat. She meets eyes with the man, "Do you think Jaeyun does not want to marry?"

Her voice is quiet and the alpha smells before he sees the worry in his wife's eyes.

It was his turn to sigh now, "I don't know. Before his first ball, he seemed excited to meet alphas. He was excited for the courting process. But something changed along the way and he had rejected everyone."

Their mother hums, "I have witnessed that as well, yes," she says, "However, I always thought he needed a push?"

Their father laughed lightly. He stood up then, going to open the window. He has a cigar in his left hand, lighting it up on a nearby candle. He brings it to his lips and puffs the air out.

He usually does that when he wants a cigar near his wife. She does not like the smell. She has a sensitive nose and the smell is too strong and unpleasant for her. So he smokes into the outside air, calming himself down with the calmness of his wife.

"Jaeyun needs to find his fit. However, the alpha that meets him in this is too specific. You cannot change that. He will be unhappy with a marriage he had not decided upon."

Their mother huffed, "But he will decide on the marriage! He can choose who to marry from the alphas we pick and-"

The alpha dismisses her, "It would be a marriage of nothing but pleasing. Jaeyun would feel in need to satiate our worries. The marriage would not be a happy one."

It was quiet again. Their mother sighing. She looked at the books lining the walls.

"What do you suggest then?" She asks, her eyes focused on her husband. She makes her jasmine scent prominent around the window and her husband, luring him to set the cigar aside and save it for later when she wasn't there.

Her husband listened and put it off. Then he closed the window, sitting back on his seat, putting the cigar back into its box.

He meets eyes with the omega sitting in front of him.

He loves her so much. So unconditionally much. He would give himself for her. He knows she would, too.

They were a match made in heaven. Both meeting at a ball when young. He loved her too much sometimes. He wishes many times that he was to die first, so he doesn't have to experience life without her. But then he thinks of himself as selfish. His wife loves him just as much, and if he left this place first, she would mourn him much as well. So he wishes that they die together. So neither of them have to experience that.

"What about Sunoo? Or Jungwon?" He asks her and she sighs.

"Sunoo is too stubborn and Jungwon is too young. Sunoo won't want to and Jungwon is just... I cannot let that happen to him."

Their father shrugs, "Maybe, but we should try, at least."

Their mother is still shaking her head, "I am sure Sunoo has at least some affections for that Park boy. The one who is trying to for the army. And Jungwon... He cannot."

Their father hums, "Maybe. But we should try. We might assume things wrongly for Sunoo. And for Jungwon, I know he is your youngest and dearest. However, this is something that is dire. We have to ask them."

So the next day they asked them. First Sunoo, then Jungwon.

Sunoo declined almost immediately.

"Father, mother. I appreciate your offer, I really do, however I cannot live with someone who I have not met. And I am interested in someone else. You both have been made aware of that, no?"

So Sunoo didn't want the deal. That was fair. So they asked Jungwon, in his own quarters while he was getting ready for dinner.

Their youngest nodded.

That night, their parents went to bed with a heavy heart.

They held hands under their comforter, both looking at the ceiling in silence.

"We made a mistake," the omega voices out, "Jungwon is not yet of age and-"

"He agreed," the alpha said, squeezing the hand he held tighter, "I am sure it wasn't from his want of pleasing us. He seemed alright with it."

Their mother turned to her husband, "Then we have done something bad in raising him. He hadn't hesitated. It... What does that say about us?"

The alpha sighed, "You are giving me mixed opinions, dearest. We proposed this. You would not have acted that way if it was Sunoo or Jaeyun. What is the matter?"

A moment passes, both of them quiet. The omega sighs.

"Jungwon is our youngest. We had the most complications surrounding his birth. I... I cannot let him go like that."

"Dearest," her husband starts, turning to his wife now, "Jungwon is of age in a year. We will proceed with the process of finding his mate now and we'll ask him in a year if he wants this to go on. Okay?"

It went a tad bit differently.

Jungwon said yes to the first alpha his parents offered.

Son of a general, already in the army. His omega father was well known as kind and giving. Both his parents wanted their son to marry someone well mannered.

So, Park Jongseong became betrothed to Sim Jungwon overnight.

And once Jungwon turned fifteen, they asked him openly, would he like to proceed with this or not. Their youngest son nodded, much like when he agreed to the meeting.

And when the, then newly named, general decided to visit them over the ball, it was everything their mother hoped for.

The alpha seemed infatuated by the omega. And the omega seemed happy as well.

And with that, their parents thought they did some wonderful match making.

Their youngest is engaged and happy, their middle has affections for a good alpha that has the same affections for him and their eldest is... Employed.

When she thinks of it, their mother has to hide her expression. She doesn't want to be harsh towards Jaeyun, so she respects his decision.

She respects it, even though it is not what she wants for him.

She wanted Jaeyun to be happy with a good alpha, have a family and share the love he has.

She supposes this is better than her son marrying an alpha that is not good.

However, now that she sees Sir Cho sitting in their living room and Jaeyun's gentle blush over his cheeks, she might not have to hide her expression on Jaeyun's life choices anymore.

For heaven's sake, this alpha got on his way to this town even though there was a war going on! And by Jaeyun's cheeks and a slight pang of sweetness in his scent, she can tell he likes him at least a little bit.

Is Sir Cho the first alpha that their Jaeyun likes?

Well, second alpha. She remembers the boy from Jaeyun's first ball. She had to stop Jaeyun from that decision. If Jaeyun were to marry an alpha that makes no income, he becomes a burden. She wants no such thing for her eldest.

However this alpha.

He seemed to have come from money. At least, in the way he dresses and talks and overall looks. And he seems to care for Jaeyun.

Their mother and father were aware that Jaeyun worked for the Cho family as the younger sibling's nurse. And this, sitting right in front of them, was the older sibling.

He was tall, had dark hair, pale skin. He was wearing a blue suit that suited his features well.

This was the first time their mother saw the man and, in her humble opinion, the alpha looked good next to her eldest son. Even Jaeyun's dress matched the alpha's suit.

Jaeyun usually wore bright colours, but it seemed that today, for whatever reason, he had worn a dark blue dress with long sleeves. He looked beautiful, he always does in his mother's eyes. And he looked even more so sitting next to that alpha.

Jaeyun's two younger brothers sat on the left side of their mother on the other couch, Jungwon and their mother drinking fennel tea while Sunoo sips on his mint one.

It was awkward for Jaeyun, more than anything. Sunoo and Jungwon watched them with amused smiles while their mother was smiling so excitedly and happily. God, she was having a field day.

And his father, who was sitting on a sofa in the corner, eyed the alpha. He still did have a smile on his face. 

Jaeyun didn't like this. Didn't like the awkwardness. Didn't like that Yeobin visited his home of all places. Didn't like his parents meeting him. At the end of the day Cho Yeobin was his employer, nothing more, nothing less. But in the eyes of his mother... He was a suitor.

"How have you been holding up with this situation?" Cho Yeobin asked, not only Jaeyun but also his whole family.

Since he was not looking at Jaeyun, Jaeyun didn't reply. Instead he looked at their mother that cleared her throat, "There have been better days. My two youngest sons have their alphas in the war. But Jaeyun had been keeping them occupied, no?"

Sunoo and Jungwon blushed at the insinuation of their alphas in battle. Sunoo and Sunghoon were not engaged, but they were promised. But in the eyes of most they were not anything official. And the general and Jungwon had never really referred to each other as... each others. They were engaged but, they never really mentioned it in that way. In the official way.

The way their mother's sentence ended, it was meant to have Jaeyun's confirmation of her statement said soon after. So Jaeyun spoke up, "I merely spend time with them," he says, eyes on the hands that were in his lap.

"That is far from the truth," Sunoo speaks up, light smile on his face, "He constantly cares for us. He really is our sunshine and we appreciate him for that."

Jaeyun laughs lightly, looking at his brother, "Sunoo-ah, your title is 'sunshine'. I am only here to enhance your brightness."

What Jaeyun didn't see was Yeobin's gentle smile and soft eyes that met his figure. But their mother saw it. And their father.

"How long will you be in town?" Their father asks, confirming that he is listening and paying attention to their conversations.

"Only for this evening. I must return over night so Iseul does not worry," the alpha says and smiles at the thought of her.

Jaeyun sees an entry for talking about something else so he opens his mouth to ask, "How has Iseul been holding up?"

Cho Yeobin averts his gaze and Jaeyun thinks of the worst. The alpha sees that in his eyes when he looks back at the omega next to him, so he assures him, "Do not worry. Iseul is doing fine," the alpha's hand land on Jaeyun's arm for a brief moment and Jaeyun can feel his mother's smile getting larger and Sunoo and Jungwon's eyes growing wider.

"Is something else the matter?" Jaeyun asks, glad that the touch they shared was so short. Maybe if he was not in the presence of his whole family, maybe then he'd enjoy this alpha's touch.

Cho Yeobin hums, "She misses you, for the most part," Yeobin says and Jaeyun feels a wave of guiltiness wash over him.

He was thinking of leaving Iseul. He was thinking of quitting his job as her nurse. And she misses him. She wants him there. He feels awful for a moment. Terrible. As if his heart sunk deep inside of him, making a hole where his heart was. 

Then Yeobin touched his arm again, "But nurse Kwon has been taking great care of her. So no need to worry. Her energy has not been high since before the war, but she isn't doing awful. Don't worry."

The touch disappears again. He still thinks he would have liked it more if it wasn't with his family.

He doesn't like Cho Yeobin's 'don't worry'. The touch of his hand wasn't reassuring. It made him nervous in front of his family. He wanted to get away from their eyes. But he wasn't sure did he want the two of them to be alone.

So he settled, "Sir Cho," he spoke up, clearing his throat, "Would you like to take a walk through our town? I am under the impression you are not here often."

-

He walked side by side with Cho Yeobin as they made their way around town. It was quiet for a while. Would Jaeyun say it was awkward? Not really, they just walked and appreciated their surroundings, right?

"Nurse Sim," Cho Yeobin starts, "Did you want to talk about something alone?" He asks, eyes leaving the scenery to look at the omega next to him. Jaeyun looks at him in return, the two staring for a brief moment.

Jaeyun had to admit the alpha's eyes were stunning. They were hazel in colour, similar to Sunoo, but the shape was different. It made for such a nice harmony of features on the alphas face. Aside from his eyes, Jaeyun also has to admit the alpha is handsome. But that is objective. The alpha was handsome to the naked eye, not just to him. At least, that is what he gathers from the stares of a few omegas who walked by them and some of the omega workers at the Cho manor.

"I suppose I wanted some fresh air. And a place to talk where my mother wasn't present," he says, sighing at the last part, "I apologize for that," he says and the alpha only smiles lightly. He also had nice teeth. Very bright and straight.

"No need to apologize. Your family seems lovely," the alpha says, averting his gaze to the front. They walked around with seemingly no goal.

Jaeyun chuckles, "You are just saying that," he says, "She had been like that with every alpha that entered our house. She is known for her pestering."

The alpha smiles lightly at that, a hum leaving his lips.

Silence again. They don't really have much to talk about aside Iseul when at the manor. Maybe some more small talk exchanged. But now, just the two of them, it was silent.

The alpha broke it soon enough though, "Your mother mentioned your brothers having their alphas at war at the moment," he says, "It must be tough taking care of two worrisome omegas."

Jaeyun nods and hums in confirmation, "I try my best to cheer them up. My middle brother, Sunoo - he was the one sitting on the far left - his alpha is a friend of mine. We spent time together when we were younger. We are good friends now as well. And Jungwon, he's the youngest - he sat next to my mother - he is betrothed to general Park."

The alpha's eyes widen, "General Park? General Park Jongseong, right?"

Jaeyun nods, one of his eyebrows raised. Either was the general so popular with the alphas that everyone knew him, or he was an acquaintance of the general.

"I was not aware he was engaged," the alpha says, fixing his posture momentarily, "We had been good peers in our private school we both attended. He was a seatmate of mine. I only found out later that he had become a general. And now I find out he has an omega. What a small world."

Jaeyun hums. He debates asking more about the general. It would serve him as some extra knowledge that he had not known before. Also, it would not be bad to know what kind of a person he was to people outside their circle.

So he proceeds to ask, "What do you think of him? The general," Jaeyun asks, looking briefly at the other.

Yeobin smiles, "He helped me finish that private school, that is how good he is," he says, glancing at the other as well, "He wasn't particularly outstandingly smart, but he was sly and cunning and he knew his way around every class. And every teacher loved him. Some even adored him. Even the other students, he was everyone's friend. He loved music, listening and playing. Really, an alpha of the highest esteem. Your brother is lucky to have him."

Yeobin finishes with a nostalgic smile, as if remembering his time in that private school. 

A thought flew into Jaeyun's mind fast, leaving with similar speed. But it still was there. Omegas didn't have private schools, they had only governesses. Alphas also had them occasionally, before they went to those private boarding schools. But omegas only had governesses. And their knowledge wasn't of the alphas'. Why was that? Jaeyun thought himself as smart or even smarter than many alphas he met.

Maybe those private schools were not really anything special.

"And the general is also lucky. To have my brother, that is," he says to the alpha, smiling lightly at the thought of Jungwon. 

The alpha hums, "Of course. Every alpha is lucky to have an omega by their side. And I am sure that to someone as high as a general that means a lot. So I have no doubt Jongseong feels lucky. The luckiest."

Jaeyun  hums. He was about to ask something more of the alpha when the alpha spoke up. But he wasn't speaking to Jaeyun, he was speaking to someone who was walking towards them. Well, not towards, but in their direction, that is. 

"Heeseung-ah," Yeobin speaks up, waving a hand at the alpha.

Jaeyun smells him first, like many times before. His scent has become so prominent in his nose recently. He had spent some of his time in the garden with Sunoo looking and touching the patchouli flowers, so delicate. And smelling them. They just didn't have that magic touch of paint, of hard work put into his paintings.

Once he sees him, he has to look away. The alpha is his usual self. Black coat, black shoes, black pants. His hands are covered by white gloves and his hair is uncovered, letting it ruffle in the wind. Jaeyun wants to touch it so bad he has to close his eyes and breath shallow breaths, as to not inhale too much of the scent. 

This scent is doused in the smell of paint and it makes Jaeyun wonder how smelling plain patchouli didn't make him want more. He thinks of buying paint, but his brain pulls him at a halt. He shouldn't be acting like this. There was nothing between him and the alpha.

Lee Heeseung stops in his way and glances at them. Then he does a double take and really looks at them. His eyes stay longer on Jaeyun than on Yeobin. He wonders why when he is pretty sure the alpha hasn't seen his friend longer than Jaeyun.

"Yeobin, I have not seen you since the funeral," Heeseung says, shaking hands with the alpha, "And Jaeyun-shii," he bows to him and Jaeyun bows back.

"Very nice seeing you today, Heeseung-shii," he replies and smiles lightly, trying to act as composed as possible.

Yeobin looks from Heeseung to Jaeyun, the two staring at one another for a second too long. Jaeyun's mind supplies that Yeobin must look surprised that they refer to one another with their first name. Jaeyun cannot blame him.

"Yeobin," the slightly taller alpha says, "What brings you here? In the midst of these circumstances?"

Yeobin's smile is faint. He steals a glance at the omega before replying, "Jaeyun-shii," Yeobin has never called him such, "Has been working with Iseul for some time now. I am here to check up on him. Amid these circumstances."

Lee Heeseung takes a second before he hums, "How is Iseul. I heard from aunt that she cannot continue dancing anymore. Must've been hard for her," he says, eyes turning sadder at the thought.

Yeobin sighs, "That is correct. But she is holding on tight. Jaeyun-shii here is helping her get better. Stay healthy," he says, lips pulled in. His eyes don't leave Jaeyun even after his sentence is finished and Jaeyun blushes. He always gets flustered by compliments.

Heeseung looks from Yeobin to Jaeyun, then back to Yeobin. He looks like he's contemplating saying something else to what Yeobin said, but he doesn't at the end.

His eyes bore a little stronger at Yeobin then, nodding his head, "Pleasure seeing you," he says, bowing his head, the other alpha bowing his head as well. Then he turns to Jaeyun and Jaeyun has to look down from the intense stare, "You as well, Jaeyun-shii."

-

After a painfully long dinner with Cho Yeobin and his entire family, Jaeyun wants to curl up in his bed and never come out again. His mother was pestering the alpha about all sorts of things and it made him uncomfortable. He was even moved from his usual seat next to his father to a seat next to Cho Yeobin. He cannot believe her.

Cho Yeobin was right now in a carriage that was on it's way to his manor, so the house was quieter than before. Their mother even got the maids talking. Really, he does not remember a time when she was this pestering and annoying.

Before Jaeyun could enter his room and undress from today's clothes, he hears a knock on his door. He sighs. It's either one of his brothers, coming to tease him or their mother, coming to... embarrass him even more.

It was the latter.

Jaeyun groans as she smiles wide. She shakes her head at her son, "Wasn't he one lovely alpha? He seems so nice, no?"

Jaeyun really wants to stop talking to her and just bury his head in his comforter.

"Of course he's nice. He has manners," he says, entering his room back, sitting at his vanity. His mother enters after him, leaving the door open behind her.

"Do you fancy him, Jaeyunnie?" She asks and Jaeyun has to groan again. 

"Not that much to marry him, no," he says. He takes off the necklace that was sitting heavy on his chest, putting it aside in his jewelry box.

The older omega sits on Jaeyun's made bed, her arms crossing in front of her, "Not yet, no," she says and Jaeyun feels a headache, "But you haven't rejected him. And you rejected every other alpha before."

She has a point there. Jaeyun himself isn't sure why Cho Yeobin hasn't been rejected yet. Jaeyun supposes he can fancy him little, yes, but to the point his mother insists... He is not sure of it.

He sighs, "I am rather tired, mother. Shall we talk about this another time?" He asks her, turning to face her. He takes the pins out of his hair and carefully puts them on the table that is now by his side as he faces his mother.

His mother shakes her head, "Don't miss out on him. He is a nice alpha that likes you, even though you grew of age too long ago. And he is of wealth. Think about it," she says and stands up, going to face Jaeyun.

Jaeyun furrows his eyebrows. This doesn't sit right with him. He stands up to be his mother's height, looking her in the eye (she was a bit shorter than him, but Jaeyun could see her like this clearer), "I am well aware you do not want me working," he says, making her widen her eyes, "And I do not like what you plan with me. His wealth and acceptance to my old age is not the standard to which you want your sons to be applied."

He walks past her and to his wardrobe, opening it and pulling out his sleeping gown.

His mother faces him, still standing in place, "Jaeyun," she says, "You know this could help our situation-"

"Mother, I am helping our situation!" He interrupts her, "Father is in need of work, Sunghoon's family is not that rich so you need to pay Sunoo of to them and poor Jungwon had to be taken into an arranged marriage. You sleep well only because the betrothed turned out to be a good man."

He sits on his bed, untying the strings of his dress. His mother is looking at him with more emotion than he can remember her ever having.

"Jaeyun-ah," she starts, "You don't understand, I-"

"Do not start, mother," Jaeyun cuts her off again, "I am well aware you are not pleased with my choice to work. But I assure you I am. And no alpha will stop me, no matter their proposal. I want you to understand that this is my life, even if I am an omega. I am aware of my status and what it makes to our family name, but it makes me happy. So much I have told you when I decided on it. Do not play foolish."

She sighs. Then, she gets near Jaeyun and starts helping him with the strings of his dress, taking the whole piece of faster, "I want what is best for you," she says. She shushes him before Jaeyun can say something, "And the best for you is a comfortable life with a good alpha and kids. You wouldn't have to work. Don't you want children?"

Jaeyun sighs, resisting the urge to scream in his palms, "Mother, I want to work. I don't want to lose my purpose and become an alpha's omega. I want to be someone. I might have liked some alphas but if they do not allow me to be a working omega I refuse to consider any relation."

His mother is quiet for a second. She seems to be thinking. Jaeyun takes that moment happily, putting his night dress on. He sighs as he pushes his covers down, ready to dive in once his mother leaves him alone.

"It was that boy who was a painter, wasn't it?"

Simple question. So simple Jaeyun is startled from his state. He doesn't understand anything. So much he makes clear to his mother.

"He was the first alpha you liked and I stirred you away from him because of his passion," she says, looking at her eldest son, "I still stand by that. Somebody with an unstable career choice cannot uphold you," Jaeyun groans. She will never get it, "And then he was gone. After the ball you never saw him. He changed you, Jaeyunnie. And I don't know how but I am sure he did."

Jaeyun sighs, "Why does my every decision have to involve an alpha?" He asks her rhetorically, "I want to work, I say. What about finding an alpha and mating with him, you say. I don't want to mate an alpha? But you do! That is how you sound. The second I say something against mating or marriage or alphas in the broad sense, you dismiss my thoughts and opinions. Why are you on the alphas' side? Why is father more understanding than you? You were always the one saying that we omegas need to stick together."

It was quiet after his little speech. He hopes that his mother will just leave the room and not say anything. That would be a gift godsent.

"I want what is best for you," she says again and Jaeyun wants to scream, "And the best life for you is-"

"To mate and marry a wealthy alpha and have his children and never do anything other than that. Like you did. Like uncle would have done. Like your mother did. Like you expect every omega of our status to do so. Stop it. We don't all want the same, mother," he says, feeling tears welling up in his eyes, "I apologize if I am not to rival your expectations. If all you wanted to say had been said, I would kindly ask of you to leave the room. I am rather tired."

And she did so. She listened to him for the first time since she stepped into this room.

This wasn't about Cho Yeobin caring for Jaeyun. This was about his mother seeing the end of her son's independace as a lone omega. 

Maybe he does want an alpha, but one that will work beside him, not for him, to provide for him. One that will respect his work and whose work he will respect.

He hears soft footsteps enter the room and then, two warm bodies shifting on his bed beside him and hugging him.

He lifts his head up, eyes teary, "She doesn't understand. She doesn't want to," and a waterfall follows.

He's the oldest, he should provide comfort and strength to his two younger brothers. But now he feels like a little boy, alone and aware, as his mother tends to Jungwon and their governess to Sunoo.

None of them say anything. They just hug one another tighter, making a safe space for all thee of them.

-

Sunoo prided himself in rarely being late. Weather for breakfast or for a ball, he always got ready beforehand and arrived on time.

Only other person that hates being late more than him was Sunghoon, surprisingly so.

He was a clumsy alpha in many ways, but he was always respectful and apologetic when needed. And he respected Sunoo's time and was apologetic when he wasn't doing so.

Sunoo also prides himself in being annoying. The most of his siblings, that is for sure.

He used to get ready and arrive at his and Sunghoon's meeting point extra early so he could wait for the alpha to show up and then complain in his face that he was late. Which he was not, but Sunoo had his ways of teasing.

To the naked eye, their interlocked arms seemed sweet and lovely. They were both sweet and lovely, no questions asked, however they were also teasing, snarky, full of silly funny comments.

They were different than many young courting couples in that way. Maybe it was the time they spent together. Maybe it was actually their personalities. He cannot guess.

What he can do, however, is enjoy his time with the alpha.

Deep down, he knew Sunghoon's choice of career had given them many weeks of worry to come. But Sunoo was prepared for everything.

At least he thought so.

When the time of the battle came in, he was scared and worried. What if he stayed without Sunghoon? What if he had to pursue a future without the alpha? It scared him thinking of all the things that could go wrong.

And later... He wants Sunghoon's children, his pups. He wants a happy life, with a small house and a garden. He wants them to have their own room, as parents do, and their kids separate ones. He wants to have a cook. He wants to have a maid. He cannot wait to have all that.

With Sunghoon. His future relays so much on the alpha, Jaeyun would have probably scolded him.

Because Jaeyun fussed so much to his two younger brothers. 

Do not lose your purpose. Do not let an alpha erase your purpose.

At first, Sunoo thought of him as repetitive. He thought of him as boring and just something that Jaeyun, as an older brother, had to do.

But he understands now.

There is no Sunghoon to occupy his time physically. Only in his mind. And he feels helpless and small and sorry and sad.

He doesn't feel good without the alpha.

So he starts something that he is sure will at least garner him a safe space and some peace.

He grabbed the gardening books and tools and got to work. He planted many flowers since then, checking them every day and watering them thoroughly.

Was gardening his purpose? He doesn't think so. It was more of a hobby. But it reminded him of who he was. It reminded him that he was Sim Sunoo, one of the three omegas of the Sim family and the one that was often referred to as the... pretty one.

That wasn't his purpose either, though, was it?

He thought of Jaeyun's words and he thought hard. He came to a conclusion that he simply did not have one to begin with.

And that made him sad for a minute longer before remembering some other words Jaeyun used to always repeat.

Your purpose can be personal. It can be something you do or something you feel or have. It's not defined.

And that made Sunoo conclude he had a purpose. He was just not one hundred percent aware of it. he had not found it just yet.

He knew Jaeyun had a purpose. It was not to take care and teach children, no. It was helping. The simple act made him happy, he was sure of that. The bonus of that had been caring, which was instinctual to omegas but his senses were heightened. Though Sunoo knows that isn't part of his purpose.

Jungwon... he wasn't sure about him. He was always indifferent to Jaeyun's words, always nodding his head and not replying much. If Sunoo were to guess, he had not thought long on their older brothers words. They merely entered one ear and came out the other.

He was sure of his mothers purpose though.

It was to share. Weather it be to the three of them or to their father, to their staff or someone outside their home. For how she seemed to be strict at some points, she seemed to be kind and giving on others.

She is always giving to those in need. Sunoo remembers when he was but a small boy, their mother lead them out one day, all three of them, with a bag of leftovers from their lunch that she got from the kitchen cooks.

They stopped at a place of the town not one parent wants to see their child at. They stopped at a shelter for those without a home, where they gathered to eat and drink and enjoy the warmth.

He remembers it, he was holding Jaeyun's hand (he would have to guess and say he was six and Jaeyun eight, making Jungwon a small three year old), the older boy gripping his one tighter and the other gripped onto the bag of leftovers. It was not heavy, so Jaeyun could manage.

Their mother held Jungwon in one hand (she used to joke he was so easy to carry she could only use her pinky to hold him up) and the other held onto Sunoo's, so none of them get lost.

They gave the food to the shelter and walked back home. On their way back, Jaeyun had many questions, about the people there, about what they were eating, how it was founded. Why their mother lead them here.

"An important lesson I learned from omegas in my life," she starts, hoisting Jungwon up for a moment before continuing, "Always be willing to share and help. Give and you will be given. You three have to remember that. As you give, what is taken will return."

Sunoo remembers her in good memory then. She was smiling and caring. 

Sunoo thinks on that for a second longer. Maybe she lost her purpose. But not in the hands of an alpha but the one of her children. Or not them specifically, maybe the part where she had to be a parent, maybe that made her lose her purpose? Sunoo wasn't sure.

Cause she acted different after their governess stopped being there. It was like she was faced with three children at last.

All three had their governess until they were fifteen. Their mother was first faced with a gentle and easy Jaeyun. Sunoo supposes she never really thought that she would have all of them and their personalities. He came to a conclusion their mother expected three carbon copies of herself.

Jaeyun was good at maintaining that. But then, two years later, Sunoo came to be of age and she was faced with how he really was.

Yes, they spent time with her all the time, next to their governess, but their governess, mrs. Sooyoung, she was there for around seven to eight hours, five days a week. The rest was for the parents and maids to handle.

However much Sunoo thinks mrs. Sooyoung could have been kinder or nicer towards them, he thinks she tolerated them good. She knew what her job was and she did a splendid work of it, teaching the omegas in them.

But, she may be the sole reason Sunoo has no possession of greater passions. Because throughout their childhood, she was there to make them comply easier, faster. She was not there to work on Sunoo's growing creativity or Jungwon's curiousness or Jaeyun's interests.

Whatever the matter, that was what happened, and Sunoo could not turn back time. He could not make their governess more pliable and bended her to their rules. 

What he did know, however, was that Jaeyun could be the type of governess to stroke somebodies curiosity, make them feel involved in things they aren't familiar with. Or to grow their creativity, make them proud of themselves and what they have become. Jaeyun is the perfect person for a job as governess.

That is why he had been easily reassured when Jaeyun spoke of the idea. He was sad about the older not getting a wedding and his own kids, however he will take care of others. Maybe even take care of their children, his and Jungwon's little ones. He hoped so. He will help.

Seeing Jaeyun work so hard as a nurse made Sunoo doubt his choices. It was obvious Jaeyun preferred work with the little ones over their parents and cousins and adults. So it begs a question out of him: what if one is met with their purpose but never gets to work on it?

What if their mother found solace in sharing and giving, but could not have afforded it? What if Jaeyun were to discover his wish is to help however he is not able to provide that? Help to the little ones in this case, that is.

Those thoughts plagued his mind as he made his way to the Parks.

Those people had a purpose, Sunoo supposes. Sunghoon's younger sister loved dance. Sunghoon was in the army and that was something he always wanted. Their omega mother gave their alpha mother the idea of a bakery, so he supposes her purpose might be to spark ideas. And their alpha mother must... Well, he wasn't sure.

He sees alphas all around him know what they will do and how they will do it. He sees alphas with purpose everywhere. But so many omegas were reduced to their alphas. Sunoo didn't like that.

Yes, he wanted to be somebodies (Sunghoon's, only Sunghoon's) omega, but he made an oath to himself and to Jaeyun. He will, even if it cost him his life, express his desires and wishes and wants and needs. He will let Sunghoon know what he knew was his passion and purpose. He is sure the alpha will respect him and give him whatever he needs. He is more than confidant about that.

He will let Sunghoon know but also the world around them. Their town, their families, their friends. He wants everyone to know Sunoo as both Sunghoon's omega and the omega who was good at something. Who had a purpose.

He exhaled shakily as he saw the sign of the bakery from the side. It was flapping in the wind of the early morning, fast but not strong. It was gentle on his skin and made the ends of his light blue dress flutter. He closed his eyes.

Every time he visits them, it pains him to see them all so hurt. Their omega mother is worried sick to the point her eyes were puffy from all the tears. Sunghoon's little sister was unusually quiet and their alpha mother usually offered a smile that Sunoo knew too well was fake. He came here to cheer them up. 

They knew Sunoo from an early age, since he was born. Their parents walked him around town often, and everyone knew little Sunoo. Little Sunoo made sure of it. And then they got to know each other better, Sunghoon and him, and were visiting the bakery and were talking to his parents.

He remembers being small and smiley, running to the bakery. He always caught Sunghoon's parents together and his alpha mother always had a fond smile while looking at his mother.

He pauses. Maybe the elder alpha's purpose was to make those around him happy and content. With his gentle smile and warm hands.

Sunoo didn't have much to ponder over that fact once his eyes met a blob of red inside the bakery window.

Sunghoon. It was Sunghoon.

He was hugging and spinning his sister around. Their omega mother sat at the table, caressing her son's arm with a warm palm, joyful tears streaming down her face. Their alpha mother also shed a tear.

Sunoo had no time to think about it before every nerve in his body jolted and lead him to hurriedly open the door.

The family looked at him, first the parents, then their children.

Sunoo lunged himself at Sunghoon the moment he saw his sister move away. 

And Sunghoon waited for him with open arms. 

Like he always will. Sunoo just knows that.

Chapter Text

The battle lasted for almost a long month, that much Sunoo could tell you. Four weeks and two days. Thirty days in total. He counted each and every, hoping that it would end soon.

From what Sunghoon had told him, both sides retreated once there was an agreement made with the generals. That piqued Sunoo's curiosity more.

"General Park?" He asked and Sunghoon hummed around a mouthful of pastry. They were still in the bakery and were sitting on a table behind the counter. Sunghoon's sister was out but Sunghoon's parents stayed inside, joyfully kneading dough and talking amongst themselves, stealing glances at the young couple.

"Him and general Min came to an agreement and all was settled. It was also an agreement about peace and further battle. There will be no such things between our and their land from now on," Sunghoon says and Sunoo hums.

"So," he starts, "What does that really mean?" He says, smiling sheepishly at the other. Sunghoon smiles back, eyes glinting at him with adoration. 

"It means I get a break now," he says and Sunoo beams, "No training for at least a week. And some paperwork we have to sign," he says. 

Sunoo gasps, "Oh, what to do with so much time?" He smiles, eyes closing. He feels as if a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders.

Sunghoon shrugs, "We'll see," he says dusting his hands from powdered sugar that transferred to his fingers from the pastry. He stood up and made a motion for Sunoo to do the same.

Sunoo stood up and bowed to Sunghoon's mothers, the two bowing back. They exited the bakery making their way across town. 

Sunoo saw what he hadn't noticed before as he walked, for better or for worse because he was lost in thought as he walked there. There were red uniforms everywhere and they were being hugged by mates, mothers, fathers and brothers and sisters. It was joyful all around, celebrating the end of a battle that lasted too long for their liking.

He saw their neighbours laughing as they walked with two of their alpha children who were in war. It made him smile. He was glad this was over.

"So what have you been up to since I had been gone?" Sunghoon asked him as they walked. Their arms were intertwined as they walked in perfect sync. He missed this.

Sunoo shrugs, "I had little to do so I started gardening," he says, looking down, "I planted mostly flowers but also some mint. To remind me of you."

He looks up at the alpha and the alpha is smiling wide. He looks around and sees that no one is paying too much attention to them, so he bends down to Sunoo's height and kisses his cheek. Sunoo giggles out and scrunches his nose at the action.

"I love you so much," Sunghoon tells him. He's looking at the other intently and with passion, as if trying to get just how much he loves him across. 

Sunoo smiles back, "I love you more," he says and squeezes the alpha's arm with his palm. He looks up at him and they both smile so fondly.

Sunoo missed this.

"So," Sunghoon started, "Gardening? How so?" He asked and looked at the other. Sunoo smiled again (he can't wipe it of his face, really) and huffed out a laugh.

"I am not sure," he starts, "Jaeyunie-hyung had been doing everything in his power to make Jungwonnie and I stop fussing and worrying. I owe this whole month to him. He was too good for us."

Sunghoon smiles, "We should make our way to your house," Sunghoon says, "I want to greet Jaeyun-ah. And thank him, of course. I couldn't stop thinking of you and how much you'd worry."

Sunoo looks at him, surprised, "What were you thinking about?"

Sunghoon sighs, "Rethinking my choice of career? My last wish is to make you worry, and with this possibly being something to get you worked up, I felt horrible. Because I know you love me and you worry about me. It's a blessing and a curse, don't you think?"

Sunoo frowns, "Do not think that. I will always support you. It will be hard for me at first, but I will get used to this at one point, do not fret. I am more then capable to be on my own. And maybe even... take care of our pups like that."

Now it was Sunghoon's turn to frown, "I don't want you to take care of them on your own. I want us to be with them equally. I want us to be equal with our own," he says and Sunoo stops. His mouth is open and his eyes are wide.

"Equal?" He questions, eyes shinning.

Sunghoon smiles at him, "Equal. We take care of them together. And with their maids, of course. But together. Hand in hand. I want us to be together like that."

Sunoo exhales and looks down, "You are an angel, you know such?" He asks and Sunghoon laughs. It was an easy laugh, one that made Sunoo smile as well.

"As long as you think so, I believe it. Thank you, my Sunoo," he smiles.

Sunoo exhales and grips at the other's arm, tugging him so they move forward, "But to continue on the topic we talked about before," he started, clearing his throat, "I will support you. Through time it will get better and I will get used to this. I believe in you and what you set out for yourself, okay? I'll be here. Possibly gardening," he says, smiling lightly.

Sunghoon laughs at him, "Then I'll work even harder so we can have a house with a garden. One that you can arrange," he says and Sunoo smiles at him.

Sunoo is sure that Sunghoon will give him whatever he asks for, however hard it is to get it. But Sunoo is also sure Sunghoon knows the omega would do the same for him. Because they were together and they know each other. That is important.

-

Once they reach the gate of the Sim house, they are greeted with two red clad soldiers standing at the front. Sunoo looks at Sunghoon with confusion.

The alpha looks confused for a second before his face lights up in realization, "The general is here," he says and Sunoo gasps.

He runs to the door and the two alpha soldiers bow to him and open the door to him. The omega dashes inside as Sunghoon trudges behind him with a smile, the soldiers greeting him with a bow, him greeting back. He is familiar with the two, after all.

Inside, Sunghoon sees the three brothers' parents drinking tea at a table and looking outside at the garden. He looks further into the room and sees Sunoo and Jaeyun talking animatedly as they stare at the two in the garden.

Sunghoon greets their parents and moves to the two omegas.

"Hello," he says as him and Jaeyun meet eyes.

Jaeyun smiles at him and laughs, "I see you come with no injury," he tells him and Sunghoon hums a 'yes'. They hug lightly, as if they were siblings, and look to the front of them. Sunghoon feels Sunoo's hand grabbing his and he holds it back.

In their garden, the general and Jungwon were sitting side by side, talking amongst themselves.

At first, it was quiet and neither wanted to say something. The first to speak up was Jungwon, and conversation flowed after that.

"I had to come here, to you," the general says at one point, "I had not answered your last letter and I had no intention to worry you. So I had took it upon myself to answer, but not with letter. I hope you do not mind."

Jungwon smiled, "I am glad you are here. You reassure me. I worried, but thanks to my brothers, I was able to not worry as much. Though, I have to say something, before anything else happens, and while you are here."

The general hums, looking at him.

Their garden was not grand by any means, but by now it was full of flowers in full bloom, decoration the pathway. There was one bench, the one the two were sitting on at the moment, that their parents loved sitting on after lunch, talking.

Jungwon wears a pretty and warm orange dress, the material so soft under his fingertips. His fingers tangle in the material, playing with it. His hair is mildly wavy naturally, and that was how Jungwon liked it, so it stayed like this, short and with soft curls. He hadn't worn gloves today. Who would, inside their own home?

The general wore a similar uniform to Sunghoon's, only he had more gold detail and more medals and titles strapped to his sleeve or chest. A general indeed.

"I," Jungwon trails off, sighing. Park Jongseong lifts one of his hands and carefully slips it in between Jungwon's. His eyes ask if that is okay with the omega, the omega just blushing and continuing, "I have realized we have not established as clear of intentions as we should have."

He says it and looks the other in the eyes. The other stares back at him in question, furrowing his eyebrows.

Jungwon smiles, "I have not been clear of my affections for you, general Park," he starts with a smile on his face as the general goes to say something else but is stopped by Jungwon's hands squeezing his, "Because I have not told you just how much you mean to me. I am aware that from our arrangement one would take notice that we are close, which I believe we are. However I assume that my affections for you have not been said clearly."

The general's eyes are wide and full of questions, his dark eyes glinting in the gentle Sun of this morning.

"I like you a fair share, my general," Jungwon starts, a smile creeping onto his features, dimples coming out, "And I want it to be clear that I am very fond of our bond. And I want it to only grow. I hope you agree."

The general looks stunned for a moment, taking in the other's words. Their intertwined hands rest on Jungwon's lap and their scents are mixing nicely (Jaeyun has to confirm that the main scent of the alpha was the one of burning candles), creating a wonderful combination for their noses.

"I," he swallowed, "Share your sentiment. Even more so. And I appreciate you telling me that," he says, smiling lightly at the other.

The two look smitten, if the others looking at them have anything to say about them. Jungwon and the general fit so well together. Jaeyun didn't seem to notice it just as much the last time, not being able to look at them for longer.

Now he has a clear view of them.

He can see that conversation flows easily between them, bouncing around their playful voices and landing in the quiet of their smiles, nowhere near awkward. Jaeyun admires it. Admires their simple quiet that is just that: quiet. Peaceful. Calming.

Jaeyun closes his eyes.

Behind them he imagines his brother's future.

He imagines them in a similar garden, this one theirs, where Jungwon gets to laugh and smile freely, expressing his wants and needs and desires. And his alpha being there near him, caring, welcoming. There might even be a small pup in his imagination of the event. He knows Jungwon wants children, so he can only assume about their future.

Jungwon looks so happy, so content.

He sees their garden is big and spacious, maybe even full of people. Maybe they were hosting a gathering of sorts. He sees his parents to the side, laughing with each other, a small pup in their lap. By the moles on his face, this has to be Sunghoon and Sunoo's pup. He sees Sunghoon's parents and sister, sees them all smiling happily. He sees Sunghoon holding a girl in his arms, swinging her around. She looked older than the pup in his parents' lap.

Sunghoon would be a fun father, Jaeyun knows it.

He would come home from work and hug his pups, kiss them endless, play with them however they wish. That was Sunghoon. Sunghoon was not just safe, he was also entertaining. Jaeyun knew that he would be a good father just from looking at him.

In his mind, he sees Jungwon walking around with a huff, heavy belly protruding in front of him. He sees the general, Jongseong, help him sit next to Sunoo. They kiss, briefly and softly but warmly and kindly.

He sees Jongseong leave and now it was him and Sunoo talking, smiling. Sunoo was talking, Jungwon listening and smiling. Sunoo had a book in his lap. He imagines it being something to do with what will interest him in the future. Maybe still gardening, maybe something else. Sowing? Maybe cooking? Jaeyun tried cooking once. Safe to say their cook banned him from the kitchen. Jaeyun supposes he deserves it.

Jaeyun is also sure Sunoo had... found himself. He had found something of his that made him wake up. That was the reason he breathed easier and lighter. He was sure of it. He was sure Sunoo is now close to finding out. Because Sunoo seemed to realize some things while Sunghoon was gone.

And then his mind drifts to himself. 

He's in a light spring dress with a floral pattern, his smile wide as he oversees them all. 

A sense of loneliness washes over him.

He, most probably, will deal with that feeling through time. It won't be eating at him as it is at the moment as he looks at his future. It won't, because he will come to terms with it, he will accept it.

Yet.

Yet, a small piece of him is greedy. He wants someone. He wants to be able to hug them before sleep. Or in his sleep. He wants to raise not just someone's children. His children. He wants them healthy and happy, smiling and running.

He sighs internally. Should this feeling overcome him?

Without further thinking, as if out of nowhere, in his mind, the imagination broadens. A little boy, looking just a few years (or maybe months, pups grow fast in that age) younger than the girl Sunghoon had been playing with.

And then next to him sits a head of black hair. Unmistakable eyes look at him with warmth and adoration. He feels the sentiment as they stare at one another. Heeseung. 

He sees Heeseung in his imaginations. He sees him holding the boy and telling him to behave. He sees him kiss his forehead. He feels the boy go and hug him. He feels it deep inside. 

The warmth. The pure fullness of the moment. Jaeyun feels at peace.

He opens his eyes just then. Glancing from the couple seated on the bench, Jungwon still in his orange dress and the general in his uniform. He looks to the side and faces his other younger brother shifting and smiling at the alpha next to him. Their hands are interlocked and their smiles grow by looking at each other.

Jaeyun stands up abruptly, startling the couple next to him, and even the ones in the garden. Jaeyun looks apologetic for only a moment before he moves and walks inside. He meets eyes with his father, the man looking at him with questioning eyes. 

His mother wasn't in the room and it was just the two of them. Jaeyun felt small at the receiving end of his father's gaze. He was never a stern man, at least not to his three sons. But he was still their father. Even with his oldest son that, if he had accepted only one proposal, would not be here. Would not be under his father's wing, rather under one of another alpha, one that is not family. 

He feels a weird emotion rise in his stomach and his eyes sting before his view of his father is blurry and unclear. A stray tear stain leaves a mark on his cheek, shining and contrasting against his skin. His father notices. Of course he does. The alpha opens his arms and Jaeyun rushes to them, closing his own arms around the man's neck.

He will always feel lonely, won't he? He preaches for freedom of his choices yet he craves the care of an alpha. He craves the touch of a love he had never had. And he is more and more sure, by the day, that that would never be. Because he had past his time for courting. He is 22 years of age. That is far too old for that.

His tears don't stop, moreover so, they amplify when he feels his father's palm on the back of his head. Like he was still a little boy. Like he could run here and into his father's arms and hug him tight and every worry would disappear. 

It was so warm and he thought for a moment: will this be the only alpha, aside from maybe Sunghoon, he will ever hug? Was this it?

He thinks of his wish, to help care for children of others. He still stands by it, he still wishes it. But there is another part that had been buried deep inside him for a little too long that had now resurfaced. The wish to be someone's. To be theirs for the eternity. He thinks of it and cannot stop his heart breaking. 

Was this something unreachable? 

And the thought that he had envisioned Lee Heeseung as his future someone. As his future alpha, mate. He shakes slightly. Him and the alpha were on good terms, and Jaeyun was aware of his own feelings. They were deep-rooted inside of Jaeyun's brain because that was the first alpha. The first to show interest all those years ago. But that was years ago. Now, Jaeyun was of age.

His mother's point echoes in his mind. Maybe he should have accepted one of the many proposals he got. At least then he would learn to love and care for the alpha.

But then again, his brain supplies, he would hate it. Despise it. It would eat at him until it doesn't devour him.

He thinks of that feeling. Was being devoured better then not being loved romantically?

He cannot know, for he did not experience neither. 

His father continues to pet his head. He doesn't say anything for the duration of Jaeyun's flow of tears. He just lets him. And Jaeyun feels so grateful for that. Because he thinks that that is exactly what he needs now. A warm hug with a familiar scent. With closed eyes, he breathes deep. The scent used to irritate his nose all the time from how intense it was but now? He wanted it to be stronger. He wanted to feel the scent in his bones. Because this was warm. And Jaeyun will never experience this for real, will he?

He thinks about his mother, and Sir Cho. He seems alright. Would he be able to satiate the loneliness he would feel?

No. Jaeyun has to remind himself. His very unusual need for someone to hold and to care for him would not overbear his need for freedom and independence. He was sure of it.

His father sighs. It was the first sound he made since Jaeyun came here and it startled him from his thoughts. His father speaks up, "I believe you are entering your preheat."

Well. That would explain some things.

-

Heats and ruts were natural for all omegas and alphas. It was something that verified your gender, or something like that.

Because a parent could know the secondary gender of the baby as soon as after birth. Something about pheromones and scents and the way they acted. 

However, when a pup really became an omega or an alpha, somewhere between the ages of 15 to 18, the first rut, in cases of alphas, or heat, in cases of omegas, hits.

And when in those kinds of situations, their senses are heightened and their noses pick up on more scents and they think of them as more saturated and intense. Both alphas and omegas have those symptoms.

What is different though, differs a lot.

Where omegas turn to their caring side, their instincts wanting to protect every and any pup in their closeness, alphas become violent, sometimes deathly so. 

All omegas hear those stories growing up. If you were an omega in the vicinity of an alpha in rut you are in danger. There have been stories of broken bones, limbs and more. What is lesser talked about is that that also happens to alphas in close vicinity of alphas in rut. Especially if they were close to their mate. If they had one, that is.

Mates were another story though. Where alphas could hurt omegas they aren't mated to, the ones that are their mates, they can only look after. Alphas lose control, yes, but with their mates they become bearable.

Omegas are sensitive and very perceptive in preheat (there is no such thing as pre-rut. Alphas get into rut very abruptly). However as soon as they enter their heat, their senses all lessen in favour of scents. Scents are heightened to that extent some claimed to have smelled alphas and omegas as far as the neighbouring towns or villages. (Jaeyun doesn't believe that. He feels his senses tingle, but not so much. Never so much.)

When in heat, omegas sometimes become senseless. They sometimes become unable to talk, listen, sometimes even see. They only smell. And the smell intensifies with touch. So apart from that, omegas tend to lose minds.

Jaeyun got his first heat three weeks after turning 15. He had entered preheat at one of the balls he was at and after, their parents lead him home and into his room where his mother and some maids tended to him.

Sunoo got his heat at 15 as well, but later in the year. His birthday is in June, his first heat happened around Christmas, maybe a few weeks early.

Jungwon's first heat happened not long ago. It was a week or two before his 17th birthday, and his head started hurting so much their mother had to hold it in her hands to stop the throbbing.

The three were different during preheat. Jaeyun was very emotional and sensitive, Sunoo was agitated and Jungwon was emotionally fine, but he got either the worst headache or the worst stomachache. Jaeyun couldn't tell what was worse. But maybe Jungwon's will change. He didn't really have a plethora of experience.

Heats and ruts all happen every five to six months. They are not often talked about but they are mentioned, maybe too much, in education. Every omega knows more about ruts than heats though. And even alphas know more about ruts. In heat and preheat, omegas are deemed sensitive and one should be careful around them.

In preheat, omegas are allowed to go everywhere under one condition: there was a familiar alpha around them. By familiar alpha it deemed an alpha member of the family, parent or sibling, or a mate. For Jaeyun that was either their father or, because they were so close and their parents trusted him, Sunghoon.

During Jaeyun's preheat, Sunghoon usually serves as emotional support. They talk more, Jaeyun cries more, and Sunghoon consoles him more. During Sunoo's preheat (he is also either in the close vicinity of their father or Sunghoon (their parents trust him a lot, too much maybe)), Sunghoon becomes more careful and watchful. It's the small differences, Jaeyun notes, that make a big overall difference in how the people see Sunghoon with each of them.

To Jaeyun, and everyone around, Sunghoon is his brother. Even to those who know them. They are aware Sunghoon and Jaeyun aren't that kind of pair.

Sunoo and Sunghoon were. Sunghoon became dotting, always careful, always gentle. Where his behaviour towards Jaeyun did not differ much from the usual, with Sunoo he became so tender and soft Jaeyun had to leave the room out of pure uncomfortableness from the two.

Jungwon was accompanied everywhere by their father. Though, Jungwon had only had two heats so far, and they both lasted fairly shortly. A normal heat lasts from around 4 to 8 days. Jungwon's first heat lasted almost four days and his second one a full 5 days. Jaeyun's heats lasted around five days while Sunoo's lasted the longest. Almost 6 days every heat. Jaeyun pitied him.

The symptoms of heat and rut could be lessened, but not eliminated, by a mate, someone who has the alphas or omegas mating bite on their neck. Mating bites were something private, usually bitten somewhere on the lower neck area. The mating bites were either made in an alpha's rut or an omega's heat.

Omegas, usually because of the dresses they wore that could expose their necks and chest, had mating bites at the back of their neck or closer to their shoulder, while alphas had one somewhere around their collarbones or even close to the juncture of their neck.

Their mother had one at her nape which she covered with her hair (it was supposed to be seen only by partners. Though a lot of omegas show them, it is a sign of respect towards an alpha) and their father had one on his left collarbone.

Jaeyun remembers mrs. Sooyoung talking to them about all those things when he was only a few days shy of eleven. Jungwon was only six and he had to sit through it as well, because of Jaeyun. Later, at also around eleven, they revised that part, but he was already familiar.

Sunoo's last heat was in January, Jungwon's was in early February and Jaeyun's was, apparently, now, in April.

He was glad that at least now it was not as cold and he could walk around town in thinner dresses and not get overwhelmed by the scents. It was nice weather and a part of Jaeyun didn't want to spend too much time in his room because of it. That was why he was using his time and spending it outside in the park with Sunoo and Sunghoon. And Layla. Sunoo had been playing with her as the two talked.

"How are the alphas from your unit?" Jaeyun asks him as they sit on the bench near where Sunoo was entertaining Layla.

Sunghoon nodded, "All are relatively good. I know Minjeong has been under a cold but she has been such for a better half of a week now. Everyone else had survived. We tend to stick close, so we have each other's backs," he says smiling at Layla as she walks to him and gives him a branch. He throws it to Sunoo and Sunoo catches, smiling as Layla looks around confused.

"That is good," Jaeyun starts, "I am aware that not a lot of our soldiers were hurt, am I right?"

The other nods and hums, speaking some more about the units and everyone in there.

They left Jungwon and Jongseong to talk in the garden alone, without their prying eyes. 

It had been long ago that the general arrived to their house. Lunch had already passed in welcoming tune, the general dining with them. And after that the two just continued talking. Jungwon suggested a walk but the general politely asked if they could stay in the garden since he had been rather tired from everything. Jungwon quickly agreed.

"And you? How have you been? Sunoo tells me you took care of him and Jungwon?" Sunghoon questions, both now looking to where Sunoo was. He looked so happy and light, dancing around and smiling as Layla ran after him.

Jaeyun nods, "I did my best. Sunoo quickly found a hobby, so he was very easily calmed. That and with the presence of mint in our garden, it really made my weeks easier," he said the last part with a teasing tone and Sunghoon had to blush lightly at the indication, mint scent piking up just a small bit.

"Well, however it be, thank you. Sunoo can overthink much, you are as aware of it as I am," Sunghoon says, smiling lightly. His ears were still pink and his one lip was taken into his mouth by his teeth, biting it carefully. Jaeyun sighed and nudged his shoulder, making the other let his lip lose. He already had a scab there, he didn't need any further damage.

It was a pleasant quiet that enveloped them, looking at not only Sunoo and Layla but at the others that walked by.

Jaeyun was lost in his thoughts soon after, thinking of sir Cho and Iseul. Now he couldn't work for another week or so, despite the war ending. He should write them a letter, telling them of his situation. Iseul would understand.

Sir Cho would too, he supposes. He is a kind alpha with great manners and Jaeyun was sure he would tell him not to worry and that Iseul will be in good hands. He thinks of the girl for just a while longer.

She was nice to be around, always either smiling or laughing, depending on her energy. Jaeyun feels sorry for her, however he never makes it clear, so the girl knows that he does not pity her. He likes spending time with her though. She is very smart as well as talented and their conversations were always ones that Jaeyun enjoyed very much.

He doesn't think he could leave her though. At least not for a while until she gets at least a bit better. Because she has told him multiple times that she loves his company and he cannot disagree. His time with her is always spent splendidly.

He probably wouldn't forgive himself if he left and something happened to her. What if something happened to her while she was with him? He isn't sure if that's better or worse. He wants to be there for her but-

He feels a palm on his shoulder. He looks at it abruptly and finds Sunghoon staring at him. He raises his eyebrow before opening his mouth, "Stop overthinking and enjoy the day. Think about the Sun and the clouds that disappeared to make way for it."

He nods his head and sighs. He should do that. His preheat always spirals him into endless pools of thoughts he wishes to forget. He has to admit, he wants a break. So he looks up at the sky and admires the blue that is above them.

-

For celebratory purposes, there was a ball organized, outside it's season, to welcome and celebrate the soldiers who fought in the battle.

First, they wanted to make another fair, but it took too much organization so they settled for a ball at the grand hall of their town.

All the soldiers who fought are invited, as well as whoever they want to invite with them. Well, that was at first before it was decided that everyone could come as long as they had entered other balls before (in the sense of way that this ball should not be somebodies introduction to society or a sudden appearance).

Jaeyun had to go, since he was personally invited by Sunghoon. And with that, since he was in preheat and, even though Sunghoon invited him to the ball he also invited Sunoo and would most likely spend the most amount of time with him, their father also had to go. And if their father went, that means their mother should go as well.

And Jungwon... This was something special for him, this ball. He was personally invited by the general himself, and since the ball was made in favour of the army and its soldiers, Park Jongseong will be there the whole night. Which also means that the two would be dancing and talking and do all the things that come with being together.

Because of that, Jungwon had woken up very early on the morning of the ball, already fussing.

He had picked a dress, some days ago, and with that the accessories. It was a bright yellow one, that complimented his tan perfectly. He chose a matching headband that tied in a bow at the back that made for an interesting little detail. His gloves were white with little yellow flowers and his shoes matched them. 

So much thought had been put into his clothes that he woke up that morning worried for how his face will appear. What shade of lip tint should he wear? Should he apply colour not just to his cheeks but to his eyelids? Should he trim his eyebrows so they look more tidy?

In the end, Sunoo chose for him a light pink shade of lip tint and a pink blush to cover his cheeks. He told him that not much else was needed and Jungwon, with a reluctant sigh, believed him.

Sunoo was calmer about the ball, even though Sunghoon invited him himself. He had chosen a light blue dress that suited him well, maybe a little too big in the waist so he wore a wide belt to accentuate it. He wore white gloves and shoes, both a similar pearl shade.

Jaeyun decided to go with darker colours. He found the fitting for his mood these days. 

He did not enjoy his heats much. They were too painful most of the times, making him cry and writhe in pain, while the rest was spent mindlessly loosing patience at himself and his body and his omega.

He does not like his heats and he does not want to pretend like everything is fine, so he chooses a dark green dress and a matching hairband with it. He opts to not wear gloves since he most probably will not be dancing due to his preheat.

Really, for the most of tonight he will be sitting down with his parents by his side, watching the ball. He couldn't decline it when Sunghoon invited him, it would be rude. And for one, he is thankful to the soldiers that fought, so he should show it accordingly.

Jungwon travels to the ball separately from them, a carriage coming from the general. With the general. They will arrive together, that is said. Jaeyun feels happy for Jungwon, who seems to enjoy the attention the general put on him. 

So their carriage had the two older brothers and their parents in there. It was quiet for the whole duration of the ride, aside from their mother and Sunoo talking some.

Jaeyun's talks with his mother had been but brief interactions between the two, exchanging some formalities. Jaeyun's mother wants to talk to him, or, she tries to. Jaeyun usually pushes her away. They aren't like that usually but after Jaeyun's outburst on the day that Sir Cho visited, it had been quiet between the two.

And his father and him were brief after Jaeyun cried in his arms. 

He knows that their father told their mother of that, but he does not want to face that fact. I wants to think that moment was purely between him and his father. He cannot except his mother knowing that. She would probably tell him 'Mothers always know' or something like that if he told her the reason. He has no desire hearing that.

Once they arrived, Jaeyun gripped Sunoo by the arm and lead him inside, their parents closely behind them.

"I must say," Sunoo starts, "I feel as happy for Jungwon as I feel sad for you," he says, smiling sadly at the other. Jaeyun knows what he's talking about and rolls his eyes. Sunoo's first preheat was spent at a ball and he was sitting on the sidelines, Sunghoon entertaining him as his father sat close by. 

But Jaeyun had no Sunghoon to keep him company because Sunghoon will spend his time with Sunoo. And Jaeyun does not blame him, moreover he knows that it should be like that. Sunoo and him were meant to engage and marry later. And they should spend time with one another. Jaeyun sees Sunghoon as a brother, and Sunghoon does as well. So Sunghoon has no point in sitting around with Jaeyun.

"Thank you, but I do not wish your pity. Go and dance with your alpha for me. Have fun," Jaeyun tells him and receives a kiss on the cheek from Sunoo when they stop at a table with their name on it.

Jaeyun goes to sit, his father next to him and his mother on his other side. Sunoo says his goodbye to their parents and walks away to where Sunghoon is with his omega mother.

Their alpha mother probably stayed home to watch over Sunghoon's sister. She is not yet of age to this society, so she will stay at home until she is fifteen. If Sunoo is correct, she is now thirteen. Plenty of time for that.

They greet each other with warm smiles on their faces, Sunghoon taking Sunoo's hand and kissing it gently, "You look lovely," Sunghoon tells the other and Sunoo smiles and bows as a thanks.

"You look amazing as well," the omega tells him and they talk some more before the music starts.

On the other end of the hall, in the big room enter the general and his omega, who just so happens to be Jaeyun and Sunoo's younger brother. And he looks dazzling. Jaeyun must say he looks even prettier now then he did at home before he entered the carriage. Must be something in the Park Jongseong air. His hair seems wavier and his cheeks redder. Jaeyun must say, he had never seen his brother like this.

He looks happy. Truly so. His smile is wide and bright and Jaeyun smiles at him without thinking. He decides he loves seeing him like that. And if like that includes his hand being taken by a certain alpha, then so be it. Because Jungwon's happiness is all that mattered.

"I am so proud of him," Jaeyun hears their mother say to their father. He turns to her and her face is also warm. It makes Jaeyun think of all the good times with their mother. Their first laughs and walks and her going with them to donate food.

He is being too sentimental. This is his heat-riddled brain talking. He needs to calm down.

"He seems more beautiful than ever," their father answers her and they both smile.

This evening will probably be a combination of his parents talking and looking at his two brothers dance. He doesn't know if he feels blessed or cursed.

-

At one point of the ball, their father had to excuse himself and go to the bathroom, leaving Jaeyun and his mother alone.

It was quiet before she started, "Jaeyun-ah," she said and he looked at her. There was a wave of something washing over him and he felt near tears at seeing her sorry state. She continued, "I apologize for my words the other day. I... I am not accustomed or thought of your desires and wishes, and so I think of them as inconvenient. However if what you want is to work, I will be here to support you."

Jaeyun inhales at her words. It was like he was waiting for her to say that. His smile is small but it brings comfort to the older omega, "Thank you for thinking that way."

It should have ended at that. Nothing more, nothing less.

"But I still want you to know that marriage is not a bad thing," she says, smile very light and careful. Jaeyun suppresses a sigh and closes his eyes. He would not like to have this oncoming conversation here. Maybe later, maybe somewhere safe. Not here, not now.

"Mother," Jaeyun says, tone warning. Clearly calling for her to stop, to drop it. His hands are tightly bunching up the skirt of his dress, his ungloved fingers shaking a little. He doesn't want to talk about it now. He is here because he was invited here by one of his best friends. Despite his preheat he at least wanted to watch people have fun in quiet.

His mother shrugs, "Jaeyun, it is reasonable for you to let me talk and hear me out," she says before continuing, not minding Jaeyun's demeanor, "Marrying would help you, even if you work! It is the knowledge that you are not alone and coming back home to an empty bed. Your alpha might not appreciate your work, but if that alpha is Cho Yeobin, I think he wouldn't mind it, since he fancies you even now."

Jaeyun wants to say something more but his father returns from the restroom and he stops himself from answering her.

He sits still in his seat, agitated at what he has to hear from his own mother. He supposes he has to expect that. Who would be so accepting of an omega that works and is from a wealthy family? It is more of a taboo topic because of that. 

He could never win. In everybody's eyes he is lacking. To his mother, he shouldn't work. To other working omegas, he is taking their jobs. (They don't say it, of course they don't. But Jaeyun was aware of the looks he received once he became lady Lee's nurse.) In the eyes of society, how could he choose to work? He is to marry. What is wrong with him? In the eyes of alphas his age he is mostly seen as a lower class omega because he works.

And if he were to choose not to work, his mother would expect pups within a year, weather he loved the alpha or not. The other omegas would think of him as entitled and spoiled for marrying someone wealthy. Society would think of him as proper, but only if he, in the first year of his mating, has children. Society and his mother think similarly, or rather his mother thinks as society does. And the alphas would deem him sorry for being taken by some alpha.

He thinks of Cho Yeobin. Jaeyun could be sure, at least to some degree, that the alpha fancies him. On their first meeting Jaeyun received a handkerchief from him and he constantly made exceptions for him. 

The only problem with that alpha is that Jaeyun wasn't sure if he liked him much. The part of him that let the flirting remarks be tells him that he might fancy the alpha. Another part of him tells him that he did so because maybe, just maybe, he feels hopeless.

He had been rejecting alphas left and right since he was of age until he grew out of it. Just because the alpha he met first raised his standards. Then, after seven long years, he sees him again and now, it's different.

They aren't young anymore. They should both be wedded by now. Lee Heeseung has to work and, for what it is, Jaeyun has to as well. When he saw him at the funeral and no recognition was seen behind his eyes, recognition Jaeyun has and holds dear to him, maybe everything fell down and apart.

And maybe because of the rejection (it isn't a rejection, Jaeyun tells himself, it is only his facing with reality that the alpha he held oh so high in his eyes, does not hold him as such) he had let himself fall into accepting the slight courting of Cho Yeobin.

He wasn't sure that, if Cho Yeobin does propose something more of their relations, he would accept it. Because his feelings are all messed up right now and he cannot think clear.

He sees his mother looking at him with soft, sad eyes and her hand goes to the two in his lap, trying to hold it.

He moves one hand and places it to his father's arm, getting the alpha's attention. His father smiles at him and prompts him to say what he wants to say.

Jaeyun smiles, "I want some fresh air," he says and stands up, "You do not have to go with me. Stay here with mother."

His father, despite his words, stands up as well, "I cannot let you be alone in preheat," he says, going to walk with him outside.

Jaeyun grabs his arm and smiles at him with as much sincerety he can muster, "It's alright, father, " he tells him, "There is nobody outside and I will be back in a minute. You stay here with mother."

He does not give him a chance to talk and walks to the door leading outside, already out of breath from the short walk. Once he's outside his breathing evens. He takes in big breaths and exhales, walking to the garden that is by the hall.

He thinks of Cho Yeobin and the fact that he will not see him for the next week or so because of his heat. He thinks of the alpha's reaction to that information. Will he be flustered? Or something more, perhaps? Jaeyun is not sure if he would like to cause the alpha 'something more'.

He thinks of Iseul and her simple smile. He supposes he misses her. She is great company, despite their positions, despite Jaeyun working for her.

The garden next to the hall is beautiful even in the dark. There are dark bushes surrounding him as he walks, from tree arches to bushes of some roses. He feels calm now. Calmer.

He sighs. He wants this heat to be over. It will be as painful as they always are and he will most probably spend most of it thinking of how lonely he is and how he will be as such until his end.

"Jaeyun-shii," he hears behind him. He turns around fast, and is met with a familiar sight.

Lee Heeseung in a suit, deep red jacket and black pants. He takes a moment to smell him and now, so close to his heat, he smells a scent so much more intense and saturated.

The patchouli is everywhere around him, in his nose, ears, mouth, touching his scent glands, his neck, his wrists. The underlying layer of paint and freshness hits him a few moments after the patchouli and he feels his head spin a bit. He feels almost faint, but not so much so that it is visible. He restrains himself from walking the few steps between them and burying his nose into the alpha's neck. He would love to do that. It would calm him down even more. It would calm him down so much better.

The alpha takes a step closer to him and he suddenly becomes aware of where they are. A garden open to the public, where anyone can see them at any moment. However, they are somewhere between the bushes, between the arches, away from the benches and flowers. A semblance of privacy.

"Heeseung-shii," he speaks up finally, after an eternity of quietness. The alpha seems to sniff the air and Jaeyun has to be remembered of his state.

He hates what is about to happen. The alpha will ask him why he's here alone, why is he not near a trusted alpha. That this is dangerous and that he should get back inside. That he, as an omega, should not take those risks. Maybe he'll even tell him he's brave for being here alone. He prepares himself for something similar to that, at least. 

Or he will tell him something some alphas not as noble would say. Or do. He supposes he does not really know the alpha, which makes him wary of the outcome. Eyes closed, he waits.

What comes is unexpected, "Should I leave you alone?" He asks the omega and he is, for a moment, taken off guard.

He looks at him confused, "What might you mean?" He asks, eyes searching the alpha's. The alpha looks down, avoiding eye contact.

"You seem to have been content thinking alone," he says and looks up, still not meeting eyes but at least looking at his face, "Should I walk somewhere else?"

Jaeyun opens his mouth, then closes it. It is his turn to look down. He is deciding if what the alpha said hurts him or flatters him. A part of him, the smart one, wants to say it flatters him, and the alpha respects the omega a great deal to let Jaeyun do what he wants and not smart around with a big alpha ego and 'I know better' attitude that any other alpha would do. On the other side, the lonely side of his brain, is hurt that the alpha cares so little that he would leave him alone in such a state. What if another alpha, much different then Heeseung, stumbles upon him?

Heeseung turns on his feet to leave the omega on his own and, before he could think, Jaeyun opens his mouth, "Stay," he says, softly and quietly, almost scared that the alpha will hear him. Scared of voicing his opinion.

But it takes him back to the night they met, where Heeseung did walk away and he had not seen him for long after that. Maybe his omega remembers that as he walks to the alpha that had stopped and turned to him in the meantime, clearly hearing his weak demand.

Maybe it's only his omega, and maybe it's him too, partially, that stops so close to the alpha, their chests only a few inches away.

The alpha looks stunned for a moment before he takes in a breath. Big mistake, Jaeyun thinks, because he takes a big inhale of Jaeyun's preheat scent, the vanilla overpowering the lemon greatly. It's sweet, Jaeyun knows, and it's so much that many told him before to control it better. Because Jaeyun's scent was mainly sour from the lemon, most people have never smelled him as so sweet. He knows that he tends to shock people, alphas and other omegas, once in preheat.

Jaeyun's hands are on the alpha's shoulders soon, their proximity making it easy for the two to touch.

This was the first real touch between them and just that, his bare hands on the alpha's clothed chest, makes his breath hitch and his stomach churn. He feels hot palms make contact with his elbows and now they had skin on skin contact.

Jaeyun, for better or for worse, wanted to moan out, for this touch is much more than it seems. While Jaeyun touches with desperation, Heeseung does so with sureness Jaeyun had not been faced with as of lately.

Jaeyun's eyes first land on Heeseung's smooth neck and where his scent glands most probably are. He takes a moment and examines the smooth skin and for a brief moment there is nothing around them and he feels a surge of something come over him and he wants to dive into his neck, take it and breath it in.

The alpha notices, so one of his hands leave the omega's arm and travels to his face. The touch is brief but it does wonders once their eyes meet.

"This is not smart, Jaeyun-shii," the alpha says, as if voicing Jaeyun's thoughts out. Jaeyun was in preheat and Heeseung was an alpha. Not even a regular one. One that serves Jaeyun great comfort. One that Jaeyun, however much he tries to deny it, fancies.

Jaeyun hums, "I firmly agree," he says, still looking at the alpha's face, "We should probably... separate," he says, even though he feels himself inching closer. He feels Heeseung's breath on his nose, then on his lips, as the alpha's eyes go from his mouth to his eyes.

Jaeyun had never wanted something so bad.

They were so close Jaeyun could feel the soft air being circulated from Heeseung blinking, his lashes moving. Their lips were there, so, so close.

It was like a ghost of a kiss though, because they heard a giggle and it felt like a reality check for the both of them.

Heeseung seemed shocked, and Jaeyun too, but primarily he felt disappointment. He stared at the alpha and then at the source of the giggle. He couldn't see a face but he sees a dress, light blue, sees the pearl gloves and knows who it is. And most probably who he is with.

Urgent eyes meet even more urgent ones, and Heeseung seems to get just what Jaeyun implies, so he turns on his heal and away from the sound of people walking and rushes in that direction.

When he is met with Sunoo and Sunghoon, they both look at him strangely. He is sure it's because he is here alone and not because they noticed Heeseung, because his scent is masked by that one of an omega in heat.

Sunghoon runs to him and takes him by the arm, getting him out of that garden and then out of the hall and into a carriage. His heat just began and it was incredibly dangerous for him to be outside, what more alone.

But he wasn't alone. Nor in the garden, not now. He doesn't know if that's something good or bad.

-

His heat is long. Six full days.

And for most of them, he had been thinking of Lee Heeseung.

He had been thinking of his scent and touch and the way his eyelashes framed his eyes and how his nose had a perfect slope and how his lips looked so inviting. And his touch, his hands and his body.

He had never felt so lonely during a heat.

-

Chapter Text

Jungwon was over the moon.

The carriage they were in looked classy and full of room, yet him and Jongseong sat next to each other with their hands touching.

It was silent, but comfortably so. He was looking from the interior of the carriage to the passing houses and trees outside. He felt his heart beat faster at just the mere thought of all the people that will be there, staring and looking at them intently.

He felt his stomach drop just a little at the thought, but he felt happy knowing that at least his brothers will be there, at least he could escape the prying eyes with them. Or with Jongseong. The alpha seems calm, but Jungwon can see, even from the limited time they spent together, that something was off.

His hand was twitching and he squinted his eyes closed every now and then.

Jungwon saw it, and despite his own nervousness, extended his fingers so they touch the other's. Jongseong looked at him and Jungwon shily smiled, taking his hand in his. It was a small gesture, but it seemed meaningful to the alpha. Meaningful enough for him to smile back and raise their intertwined hands and kiss the back of Jungwon's palm.

It makes Jungwon think of their letters. Of so many written words they exchanged before seeing each other. How insecure Jungwon was and how careful Jongseong was.

How, at the beginning, Jungwon used to sit in front of an empty paper with a quill in his hand, thinking of what could he possibly write to his betrothed. How he used to spend hours in bed, questioning his decision.

How he spent months upon months worrying for himself. How he spent them unsure. To now, where he feels secured and content, their hands interlocked and serving as a weight of reassurment to him. That it was worth the wait and the questioning, worrying times.

He knows that the general felt the same at one point. Even if he was older then Jungwon, he was still a young adult then. Jungwon was fourteen and Jongseong nineteen when he wrote the first letter. Jungwon knows that Jongseong also was not sure of his choices.

But they were here now. With each other. At least a little more sure of their decision. At least.

Jungwon just then noticed that the carriage stopped, the moving houses standing still around the big hall where the ball was. His heartbeat starts speeding up and he feels his breath hitch.

A squeeze of the other's hand has him averting his attention to the other, "Need no worry," the alpha says, "We are in this together," he smiles and the doors open, Jongseong stepping out first and offering his hand to the omega.

They made their way to the opening of the hall, some guards standing there and greeting them with a bow. The pair greets back, bowing slightly, Jungwon holding his dress with the hand that wasn't in Jongseong's.

As they walk from the entrance to the main hall, all eyes stray to the two, some shocked some sweet. 

Jungwon sees some omegas gasping at him or at the alpha, or even at both of them. He sees Sunoo and Sunghoon to the side, Sunoo smiling wide and waving a hand at him, encouraging him for tonight. Sunghoon nods his head at him, a gentle smile on his face. Him and Sunghoon have not spent a lot of time together, but he knows that Sunghoon is good to both of his brothers and that he knows Jongseong, so he thinks of Sunghoon as his friend.

To another side he also sees his parents and Jaeyun, his older brother smiling brightly at him, winking and sipping at his drink. His parents are also smiling proudly and Jungwon feels content then. His hand is in Jongseong, he is in close proximity of his family and he feels safe, despite the horde of people around them. Jungwon appreciates them.

He glances at Jongseong, Jongseong glancing at him.

They smile and make their way to the front, a few alphas stopping them to talk to Jongseong. Jungwon bows to each and every one of them, smiling lightly and trying to appear like he understands what they are talking about.

He glances around again and sees that some people are still looking at them. He sees some omegas gauge at his dress. He knows it wasn't the most expensive one, but he knows it suits him, and he will, even if it be the death of him, defend that.

His attention is back on Jongseong as he taps the back of his palm.

Jungwon looks at him and the alpha is smiling, "How about we dance? I have had enough of boring war talks," he says and offers his other hand to the omega.

Jungwon hums, "Good thing it is a ball, then," he says and gives his hand to the alpha, the two making their way to the dance floor. They stand in front of each other, their eyes shining as they look at each other. Jungwon puts a hand on the taller's shoulder, his other still in his hand. The alpha's free hand goes to Jungwon's waist and they dance to the tune of the violins and other string instruments, circling around each other with their eyes on each other only.

Jungwon feels his heart swell at the face the alpha is making. On of the corners of his lips is lifted and his eyes are shining as he looks at him. The moles on his face seem so much more prominent. Jungwon sees one just bellow his jaw as well. He sees how his eyebrows momentarily scrunch in concentration, his hand on Jungwon's waist sometimes gripping the material to keep them in sync while dancing.

He sees the little purse of his lips, as if they twitch, as the alpha averts his eyes from the the omega and to their feet. He finds the alpha awfully sweet and kind.

Jungwon comes to a realization that never in his life has he ever wanted to kiss someone that badly.

-

He decides he needs a break after a few dances. He promptly agrees with Jongseong and leads them to the table where his parents and Jaeyun are. Only now does he notice that Jaeyun is no where near. 

He glances at Sunghoon and Sunoo still dancing and his eyebrows scrunch. Jaeyun is nearing his heat and should not be alone.

"Where's Jaeyun?" Jungwon asks as he sits down in front of his parents, Jongseong sitting beside him.

His mother smiles, "Hello to you too my dear," she says and Jungwon lightly blushes, "You look lovely as always," she turns to the general then and nods his way, the general nodding back.

"He went outside for some fresh air," his father says and also nods at the alpha next to Jungwon. Jungwon's eyebrow scrunch once more. Why hasn't his father gone after him? His eyes seem to voice the concern as well, as his father says, "He asked me to stay and that he will be back shortly. If not, I will most probably leave for him. I trust him."

Jungwon knows that but he is still worried. Though for the moment he shakes his thought off and looks to the side where he sees Sunoo and Sunghoon slipping away into the garden. Maybe they'll run into Jaeyun.

-

The conversation that he is having with his parents and his betrothed seems to only graze his mind as he looks around at the people at the ball.

He truly can say that him and Jongseong made a commotion, at least one that will make gossipers gossip and others talking. He hopes they'll like them. That they'll like him. Because Jongseong is hard not to love, and Jungwon is just another omega. He hopes they'll respect him, at the very least.

Everyone in the town knew that he was engaged to someone, later they found out to who, but this was a ball where they entered together and will exit as such. And there is no doubt to anyone who sees them that they are each other's. He likes that idea, however intruding it feels, it's good to know.

It's good to know that he is liked. And respected. He wishes at least the majority thinks that.

His mind is cleared as Sunoo makes his way to their table, eyes wide. Jungwon instantly knows what it is, his heart sinking.

"Hello," he says to them all, bowing at Park Jongseong seated next to Jungwon, "Sunghoon and I had just found Jaeyun in the garden and it appears his heat has started. Sunghoon went to lead him to a carriage and I am here to inform you. He ought to go home and I think it is best for mother and father to go with him," he says, making eye contanct with their parents.

Their mother is already on her feet, "You two stay here," she says to Jungwon and Jongseong, "Jungwon-ah don't worry and have fun," she smiles, "Your father and I will handle this," she looks at her husband who stands after their eyes meet, "Sunoo, stay here until Sunghoon comes back, alright?"

Sunoo nods but Jungwon questions, "Are you sure you do not need help, mother?"

She smiles at him, "Of course, dears. Stay here and enjoy as much as you can. Know that your brother is alright and in good hands."

She takes off and through the garden, their father following her. It's amazing how she acts in sudden serious situations. She has great intuition when the situation asks for it. Jungwon's eyes stray on his father's form as he exits too, his form almost bumping into someone else who quickly retrieves.

He soon after sees the figure, an alpha, enter through the garden doors and everything makes sense.

He connects everything surprisingly soon. Lee Heeseung was in the garden, Jaeyun was too. His eyes seem alarmed which, at least to Jungwon, make sense that something must have happened. And Jaeyun is in heat so the only plausible explanation is that this alpha had something to do with it.

He even bets Heeseung dunked away from their father because he knew he would smell a heat-riddled scent of vanilla on him. Jungwon is sure if he went closer to him, he would smell it as well.

He made eye contact with Sunoo and it looked like the older had no idea of it, not seeing the alpha enter the hall through the garden door. 

He is soon whipped into another dance to clear his mind, trying to stray his thoughts away from Jaeyun and Lee Heeseung and to his lovely alpha.

He really likes his alpha, so it wasn't as hard.

-

For someone who had helped all three of her sons and a few of their unmated maids in heat, their mother feels unprepared for the intensity of the heat Jaeyun is having.

As soon as he is in his bed he is crying and sobbing and wailing. He seems to lose the ability to talk, only sounds coming out of his throat. She feels helpless as she tries to help him take his clothes and undergarments off.

She eventually manages to push him out of his clothes and into the safety of his blankets, getting a damp towel and a bowl. 

As long as Jaeyun's first heat, she insisted to be the one to care for her sons during that time, not maids. It was common for maids to take over that role, but she felt that she, as a mother, had to care for them. She did so with every heat from all three of her sons.

Sunoo has heats that are the most violent, but even that couldn't compare to the despair in Jaeyun's voice as he cried and sobbed.

She held him close as his body shook from the heat waves, his head throbbing. He cried and cried and she just held him, unaware from the emotions coursing through him.

He felt so lonely. Even in the arms of his mother, gentle hands carding through his hair, he felt lost and alone. He felt like his insides wanted to run out and find the scent of patchouli and bury in it. The only thing he has is the memory, because all the scent that was on him was gone from the intense smell of his heat-filled scent.

At one point, it's dark outside and he is left alone in his room, and there is slick everywhere underneath the sheets and blankets and he feels so many emotions as his fingers make their way to his core. He feels lonely, so so so lonely, as he sobs while nearing his release and nearly passes out. Everything is so intense and loud and his head is throbbing and he feels so overwhelmed.

He wants someone to take care of him. He wants to be someone's. He can't be alone for the rest of his life. He'll despise himself. His mind briefly supplies him with the idea of some other alpha, nameless and faceless touching him and sniffing his scent and he recoils. 

He wants Lee Heeseung. He needs him. And it has taken him too long to see that he is helpless and in need of only him. No other alpha. Just the one who smells of patchouli and paint. Just that one.

-

As soon as his heat ends, Jaeyun wipes the snot over his face away and puts the sheets away, asking a maid to make the bed with fresh ones. He sits on a seat by the table, spreading some jam on his toast as he gets used to chewing. 

His teeth had been hurting from the beginning of his heat and it was hard to chew through anything, so having something to nibble on certainly gives his mind something to think about. He is halfway done with chewing his bread when Sunoo comes into the room and beams when he sees him.

He skips to the chair where Jaeyun is, grabbing him from behind by the shoulders and hugging him, smashing their cheeks together.

"This heat of yours seemed to have lasted forever! You have no idea how much I missed you over the past week!" he says, smiling as they part, the omega sitting next to him. 

"I have missed you as well, Sunoo-ya," he says smiling, before taking another bite, "I apologize for the mess I had caused at the ball. I am sure you had been worried," he says looking at the younger.

Sunoo hums, "Yes, but mother said not to worry. She took care of you until you seemed to have fallen asleep. And through your whole heat, she had not let us inside. She had said this heat had been the worst of yours so far," he said, eyebrows crunching.

He swallows the bread before replying, "It had been tough and I am grateful to mother for taking care of me. It had been a very intense heat. But I would like to talk about something else. How have you been doing?"

And as Sunoo rambles about how Sunghoon's sister had asked him to go dress shopping with her, he reminded himself he should thank their mother for keeping the two away from him. It would scare them surely. He was such a mess he would not love it if the two had seen him as such.

Shortly after he finished his meal, in came Jungwon, humming, before stopping and running to hug Jaeyun as well. Jaeyun stood up as he saw him and smiled as they hugged.

"I feel as though it has been so long since I have seen you last," the younger says, parting from the hug. Jaeyun smiles at him and nods.

"This has been a long one, indeed," he says, humming as they sit down, Jungwon at the other side of him.

The three continue to talk before Sunoo declares he needs to get ready to meet with Sunghoon's sister, thus leaving Jungwon and Jaeyun alone.

Jaeyun glances from Sunoo's leaving figure to Jungwon's face, his eyes careful and his lips pulled into a thin a line.

"What is the matter?" he asks, eyebrows knitted as he looks at the younger. He looks worried and hesitant. He hopes his face shows him that he is encouraging him to go on and say what he wants him to say.

He thinks if maybe it is a matter involving Sunoo, because the latter just left. Maybe something about his gardening. Maybe Jungwon noticed something that could be dangerous and-

"The night of the ball when you went into heat in the garden," he starts, meeting eyes with Jaeyun. And Jaeyun already knew what he was talking about.

Someone did see them. And that someone is Jungwon, his brother. He saw them.

By Jaeyun's wide eyes, Jungwon could see that something did happen. So he went on to ask, "Have you two kissed? Because if so he had taken advantage of you and-"

Jaeyun's eyes widened and his hands flailed around. He looked around, thankfully seeing that not one of their maids was near.

"Nothing of that sort, no!" He says, hurriedly, "God, no!" He looks around once more before meeting eyes with Jungwon, "And he had not taken advantage of me. He did nothing like that," he says looking directly at Jungwon now. 

Jungwon nods his head, "But something did happen, did it not?" He asks, eyes wide.

Jaeyun feel caught in the act. It is not like whatever happened had been forbidden. It had just been frowned upon. And if more people knew he is sure there'd be some kind of scandal. And he does not want that.

And besides. He is pretty sure that how Lee Heeseung acted was because of his heat. Because he is sure any alpha would jump at the fact of an omega in heat. And the fact that he restrained himself so well might just be a sign the alpha does not like him as much. 

And Jaeyun needs to apologize. Because it is pretty embarrassing that he went into heat by the mere sniff of the alpha's scent. He has to at least do that. He thinks that he'll go to the alpha's house one of these days and face him to apologize because even if it were embarrassing and Jaeyun has clear feeling for him, he appreciates the talks they had those few times they talked.

So, he had decided that it would be the smartest to talk to the alpha in person and apologize.

"Nothing serious," he says, "I had been in the garden and he noticed I was there. He had been kind and asked if he should leave, to which I asked him to stay. We... almost kissed. But nothing really happened."

Jungwon is absorbing everything he said, eyes unfocused as he processes what he had just heard. 

After a few seconds the younger omega opens his mouth, "Something did happen," Jungwon says, "Even if there was no act of exchanging kisses or anything more, you both had been pulled together and had almost done it. It must mean he likes you," Jungwon says, a small smile on his face.

Jaeyun shakes his head, "I had realized over my heat that he had most probably been seduced by the smell of me. And I have most probably made him uncomfortable by going into heat from his smell only. He at least respects me enough to have not touched me. Or he likes me so little he did not want to," he says exhaling and looking at his lap.

Jungwon laughs, "He likes you a fair bit, do not be fooled," he says, a palm going to the other's back, "He is just slow and shy. And I am sure of the fact that he will not think of what happened as your fault. He is a good alpha."

-

He busied himself that day with writing a letter to the Cho family of how he will be returning to his post quickly. Probably in a few days, there will be a carriage in front of their door in the early hours of the morning. He had completely forgotten about them and there will be a slight alteration to his sleeping schedule for how long he had not been there.

He hopes Iseul does not like him less then she did while he arrived. And he hopes Cho Yeobin... He is not sure what he hopes for. He had established to himself how much he fancies Lee Heeseung, so appealing to the likes of Sir Cho might not be what he wants after all.

Does he want the alpha to back down and pay less attention to him? Or maybe it will be welcome. 

He sighs. He feels like he cannot think of what to say or how to act to Sir Cho until he had not talked to Heeseung. Until he had apologized. 

So, with a nicely written letter about his return to the job, he heads to the post and decides that on the way back he will stop by the alpha's house and talk to him.

He sighs one more time before quickly bathing and dressing in one of the lighter dresses (it will soon be May, so the weather had not been on the colder side), one that he usually wears to work. It is a white dress that does not have the grandest material. But it hugs him nicely, he has to admit. He puts on a dark green cover up that is light enough to not make him sweat but firm enough to protect him from the wind. 

He makes his way to the post first, walking through the town for the first time that week. 

From what Sunoo and Jungwon had told him, no one at the ball was aware of what happened beside his family and Sunghoon. And Heeseung. 

So seeing now people that he saw at the ball minding their own business and laughing and smiling about, it made him just a fraction lighter. 

He exhales as his boots hit the dried mud on the road. He is grateful that it is dry so his shoes and dress do not get as dirty. But he supposes it was his mistake if they do. He is wearing white in the town as he walks. It is like he is asking for it to happen.

He feels his hair be tousled by the gentle wind and he smiles to himself. He likes this weather. It is not too hot and not too cold. 

One of the things mrs. Sooyoung had taught him but not his brothers (due to his sheer curiosity) is that the seasons that change change differently around the world.

Somewhere, winters can be brutal and gruesome, somewhere they can be light and breezy. Somewhere summers are hot, so hot that most shops are closed and nobody goes outside. And somewhere they are warm and soft, the Sun barely heating the ground.

She had taught him about the wonders of the world, beyond their small town and the fields that surround him. She has taught him about villages and cities far from here, ones that are recognizable for many things. Sciences, arts, artists. He appreciates that knowledge and in his later life, once he had outgrown his governess, he read many books on that specific topic. He finds it fascinating.

He closes his eyes. He feels like the meaning of the world outside this town has changed since Lee Heeseung has reentered it. Because he had been outside of it. Outside of town. Seen the trees that grow on foreign land. Seen the sculptures built by foreign artists and paintings painted by ones. He has seen buildings built for people who don't understand their language. Their culture.

So many things change meaning once certain people enter ones life. Some for better, some for worse, some for... just... different.

He thinks of the fact that at least they were under the same sky. That the whole world is. That the same Sun rises and the same Sun sets. That the clouds that pass might just have come from a town he was in, or that the starts watched them both, wherever the alpha had been.

He thinks of the moon that shone for the both of them, adorning Jaeyun's sleepless eyes and Heeseung's awake form.

He imagines Heeseung outside this town. He imagines him in bars or places that were surrounded by other artists, talking and yapping about it. He thinks of him in warm coats on cold winter nights, laughing with other people like him, about something non-trivial.

He thinks of the alpha as someone who is so much different compared to him. Someone so experienced. Jaeyun had not gone farther than the Cho manor, and Heeseung had seen so much.

-

The post is closer to the Lee manor then Jaeyun would like. He wanted to sort his mind but it seemed like his mind would not stop running about some things unimportant.

So he stands before the Lee manor door, one hand in a fist, knocking on the wood, and the other clutching the fabric of his dress. He looks down to stress less, but is met with the mess of the bottom of his dress, dry, brown mud smudged over the edges. 

He wants to turn around and go home, go to his bed and be calm and satiated there. But he needed to do this. He just wanted to face his mistake and his stupid heat pheromones that must have made Heeseung uncomfortable. And after that, he hoped they at least stayed friends. He at least wanted to talk to the alpha. Share his opinions and thought with him. He wanted something calm to keep out of this mess.

The same maid that opened the door to him before, opened it now, her smile still the same, hair in the same bun and dress ironed the same. 

She bowed and let him enter.

He bows back and makes his way inside.

Her smile does not falter as she says, "Would you like me to call Sir Lee for you? Or would you like to meet with mrs. Jang again?" She asks, polite and proper.

Jaeyun feels no judgment as he hums, "Not mrs. Jang today. Could you tell Sir Lee that I request to talk to him?" He asks and the maid bows, smile gentle.

"Of course. Let me lead you to the tea room first," she says and leads him to a room on the far left.

It is a spacious room. Jaeyun used to love being here when lady Lee was sleeping or resting. There are rows and rows of books lining every corner of the room, every wall. There is a couch placed in the middle and a small table in front of it.

There are stairs in that room as well. They used to lead to lady Lee's guest room, one that she rarely used but offered to Jaeyun if he ever wanted to take a rest. Alas, he had never been in the room.

The guest room is connected to the rest of the upper floor, but it is more secluded and private then the rest of the floor. Jaeyun wonders how the rooms have changed since Lee Heeseung had been living here. Were they arranged much differently? Or were they left similar? He might never know.

The maid disappears up that same staircase, on the way signaling another servant to ask for tea in the kitchen. She makes her way to the door and knocks. At least, so he thinks. The door is only slightly visible from where he is sitting.

He feels a faint voice he recognizes. One he likes. Adores. He hears footsteps and he assumes that the maid had made her way inside the room.

He waits no longer then three minutes before Lee Heeseung immerges from the room and down the stairs, right in time as the butler brings the tea to the table.

Jaeyun feels himself blushing as he sees how the alpha looks. His shirt sleeves are rolled up to his elbows as a cloth is placed in his right hand, wiping something off of his other arm. He has normal pants on, but he looks so relaxed and so visibly at home.

His hair is tousled into a mess, like the taller had been playing and tugging at it for some time. Jaeyun wanted to reach out and smooth it over, yet it is not his place to do something as such.

He stands up to greet the alpha, to bow. Their eyes meet and the alpha looks apologetic, "I am sorry to have kept you waiting. I am working on a painting and I... I get messy while I do that sometimes," he says, gesturing to his appearance. Jaeyun doesn't mind, though.

"It is quite alright, Heeseung-shii," he says, bowing. The alpha bows back, "I am the one who showed up uninvited. I should be the one to apologize," he said, sitting down on the couch. Lee Heeseung sits opposite of him, on one of the arm chairs.

They sit there for a moment as the butler pours them tea. After he is done, Heeseung dismisses him and another butler that had been standing at the door with the other. They both exit the room in practiced stride, probably going to a room nearby. 

His attention is now only on Jaeyun, and he feels exposed.

"You needed to see me, Jaeyun-shii?" The alpha prompts and Jaeyun nods.

"I came here to apologize," he says, not wanting to look at the alpha. He, rather, looks at his hands that are clutching the cup of tea in his palms. It is hot, however he would have rather been occupied by it, then the alpha's stare.

"For?" The alpha asks. Jaeyun feels that the other scrunched his eyebrows, so he quickly takes a glance up at the other. His eyebrows are knitted together and his hands are wringing the cloth together. Jaeyun might just go insane.

"I feel as though I have been improper to you and to your space," he says glancing back at the cup. He sets it on the table for the moment, interlacing his fingers together. He looks at them as he continues, "Back at the ball that is," he says.

The alpha seems indifferent to the eye, "I am not understanding what you are implying," he starts, "I should be the one to apologize. I have-"

Jaeyun cuts him short, "I should have not been alone outside. And I should not have... caved in and got so close to you. I must have made you uncomfortable."

As he finishes, silence meets him. Jaeyun is scared to look up, to look at how the alpha is looking at him. After a long while, he hears a sigh leave the other's lips.

"I feel as though anything I do is hopeless," he says and stands up. Jaeyun hears it before he sees it.

The alpha is on his feet and he puts the cloth that was supposed to clean the paint off of him on the armchair where he sat moments ago. He isn't looking at Jaeyun as he makes his way towards the staircase.

Jaeyun is confused, "What?" He asks, standing up as well, watching the alpha step on the staircase. 

Their eyes meet, Jaeyun's concerned ones and Heeseung's agitated ones. It was an emotion he had not seen directed to him with those eyes. It felt so raw and real and Jaeyun felt like he was under a watchful eye.

"I try to stay away and you stay close. Yet for no reason it seems," the alpha says, looking away and marching up the stairs.

The omega is confused and the confusion is slightly growing into an anger, "I came to apologize! For how I acted! What might you be talking about?" He says, walking to the bottom of staircase, wishing to continue their conversation.

The alpha looks down at him, "The fact you do not understand is even worse. I think you should go, nurse Sim," he says and turns around.

Jaeyun feels his mouth open and his eyes swell. He feels sadness rise to his mind as he looks at the alpha walk up the stairs. He feels a pang at his chest at the title he had called him by.

"Why don't you explain to me what I don't understand?" He asks, shaking as he walked up the stairs, after the alpha. Their conversation was not done. Heeseung was being rude by leaving him to sit there. He should at least have those manners.

"I am not certain that you would want to know," he says and is now in front of the door leading to the room that was once a guest room. He glances one last glance at the omega, "Please do not follow me inside."

Jaeyun's breath hitched in his throat and now, the only thing that was left in him were hot tears and anger. He had no idea the artist could be so cruel. He stood there, in the middle of the staircase, his dirtied dress touching the next step.

He thinks of turning around and walking outside. He thinks of what would come out of that. Silence. They would see each other in town but refuse to talk.

He wants nothing of that sort, so he makes his way up the stairs and to the door that once was a guest room. 

He inhales only once and, clouded with anger and determination to find out, he opens the door, despite Heeseung's wish.

The first thing he sees is the alpha sitting on a chair, his face in his hands, another white cloth in his left hand a paint brush in his left. He looks like he had just started and stopped painting to burry his face in his hands. Jaeyun wants to question if he is crying, if he should console him, but he is met with the rest of the room.

A wide room.

Many windows, little curtains.

All the walls are covered in paintings, some done, some yet to be finished. On one side, there are a few of scenery, of nameless flowers in grass and soft looking clouds flowing by.

On the other side, there are paintings of someone.

The person is standing in a garden, roses around them, their dark blue dress flowing around. The blue dress that is also standing in a poppy field. On some pictures the person is dancing. Moving. Laughing. Watching.

The person is turned to face the people from the canvas in most of them. In those where that is not the case, his eyes are met with dark brown hair.

Then, there was a small stack of ones that looked new, most unfinished. Dresses of multiple colours, hands in various positions and poses. Flowers in different stages of bloom. Feet pattering on different surfaces.

Smiles.

His smiles.

Jaeyun's face. His dresses. His hands. His feet. His boots. 

The dark blue dress. The one he wore that one night, seven long years ago when they had met. When they had talked for the first time. When Jaeyun had fallen hopelessly in love with an alpha on the leave.

He remembers him. Heeseung remembers Jaeyun. He remembers what he wore. Where they were. He remembered his face so clearly to have painted it from various angles and with various features.

He remembers the night that changed Jaeyun. Jaeyun wasn't the only one to have that memory. He wasn't the only one in love.

He remembers how his face was then, chubbier and fuller, how his smile had been different, with slightly crooked teeth. How his dress fit him. How his shoes fit him. His gloves too. He remembered it.

His eyes get back to Heeseung, who is staring at him with wide, wet eyes. He had been crying. Heeseung had been doing so for many years now. With only a memory. With only paintings to remind him of Jaeyun. So many paintings.

He stares back at the ones that weren't finished. Ones that had his face, slightly older and matured then that one. Where his smile lines are more prominent and his body is more mature. Where dresses fit him differently from when he was fifteen.

Heeseung stood up, his frame on guard. He had been caught in an act. One that had been going on for so long. 

Jaeyun looked back at him, at his eyes and how wide they were. They were so raw. Fear was there. Sadness. Shock. But there was also something that was there a while before, but Jaeyun had not known what it was. Now he knows.

"Two things," Jaeyun starts, walking slowly towards the alpha, his left hand raised in the air, two fingers pulled out, "First one is that I cannot believe you remember me as well and had not said anything. I think of that as highly improper," he says, inching closer.

He pulls one finger down. Then he exhales and closes his eyes, just a few steps away from the other. The alpha is staring at him, waiting for something to happen. Jaeyun stops walking.

Jaeyun pulls his hand down altogether, sighing as he makes a fist out of it, next to his white dress, "And second is that you shall never, ever, paint me again without my explicit permission."

He says it in tandem with his steps, making way to the alpha and gripping his collar in his fingers tightly, messily. He pulls the alpha down and their lips crash unceremoniously. 

Jaeyun feels as if that was what he needed. What he had been craving for. Something he had not experienced before but knew it was meant to be good. And it was.

The scent of patchouli and paint were so strong and so overpowering and the kiss was firm and unmoving for a few seconds before the omega pulled away.

His eyes were closed shut as he moved to put space between them but Heeseung had other plans. 

His left hand gripped Jaeyun by the waist and crashed them into each other, the alpha holding his other hand up to the back of the omega's neck, kissing him senseless.

And it was just that. Raw and clear. An expression of feelings and emotions. An expression of sheer love that coursed through their veins.

Jaeyun couldn't believe that the alpha remembered him.

Jaeyun's hands travelled to the alpha's head and were soon after placed there, cupping the alpha's jaw from both sides.

He deepened the kiss, raising on his feet to meet him better.

They parted for a second, their eyes meeting. It was clear that they didn't want to talk, so they dived in deeper than before, now with tongue and passion thrown in.

It was so much, Jaeyun felt like crying and laughing at the same time. He felt elated by the kiss.

Jaeyun felt his tongue fight the alpha's, angling his face so they fit better. He felt the alpha's firm hands on the back of his dress, gripping tighter than before. He felt a surge of confidence course through him, as he put his whole feet on the ground, bringing Heeseung with him by the face.

They parted for another moment and just breathed.

The alpha smiled at him, "Of course I remember my first love," he says and his smile is so comfortable. So warm. It feels so much like a warm hug. A warm embrace. A warm home.

Jaeyun smiles back, "Good," he says, biting his lip, getting a hold of the alpha's neck and pulling him down, his fingers playing with his hair, "But I would rather do something other than talk, no?" He says, smile playful and dear. For his first time doing something like that, he feels awfully confident.

Heeseung smiles as well, kissing the omega's nose before pecking his lips. They are close now, their faces so close together they feel each other's warm breaths on their lips. It makes Jaeyun giggle lightly before Heeseung kisses him again.

The alpha's hands travel downward, from his waist to his hips, squeezing lightly at his sides as he makes his way to his thighs and lightly taps them. Jaeyun understands and hold tighter to the other's neck, kissing him. The kiss is deep and uninterrupted as Jaeyun makes himself comfortable in the alpha's hold, the alpha leading him to a couch in a corner of the room.

The alpha puts him gently on the soft couch, still not breaking the kiss. Jaeyun pulls him down by the neck, laying down as the taller's hands travel over his body.

Once Jaeyun was laying on his back and Heeseung was hovering above him, Jaeyun's hands moved to unbutton the loose shirt as the alpha trailed kisses down his neck and to his exposed chest.

Heeseung stopped once Jaeyun unbuttoned his shirt fully and looked him in the eye, "If you want to stop here, we should stop," he says, "If it makes you uncomfortable-"

Jaeyun cuts him off with a scoff, "I'm uncomfortable in this dress and this corset. Take them off," he says and Heeseung smirks at him, sitting the omega up and taking the fabric of his dress in his hands, taking it off as best as he knows. 

Once he is met with Jaeyun in only his corset and underwear he takes a pause from stripping the other of his clothes and kisses his neck and chest.

Meanwhile Jaeyun bites his lip to not make noises and holds onto the other with one of his hands. The other is trying to pull the alpha's hips closer to him, in desperate need of contact.

Heeseung gets the memo and sits himself on the couch and pulls Jaeyun up in his lap, making their private parts rub together almost instantly.

Jaeyun moans on top of him, satisfied at the slightest friction. He looks down at the alpha and gulps. His chest and stomach are on full display and just now is he realizing this has never been done before for him. He had never done this.

As if reading his mind, the alpha is asking as he takes the unbuttoned shirt off of his shoulders, "You've never done this, right? We can go as far as you want to," he says, pulling the other down and kissing along his chest, "We can stop here," he offers.

Jaeyun hums, "Have never done this," he confirms, "But have thought about this," he says, smiling at the lack of movement from the other's lips, "Have thought about you," he says, now quietly. He grips the alpha's face in his hands and looks him in the eyes before lowering himself and whispering into his ear, "You were the single thought that got me through my heat."

It's as if his words immediately bring fire to the alpha, who's hands hastily move to unwrap the corset from his body, kissing him simultaneously on the lips. Jaeyun feels as light as a feather when he feels his corset being opened and their lips parting so the alpha would take it off.

Once off, Jaeyun stands up and gets on his knees in front of the alpha, unbuttoning his pants and pulling them down with his underwear. He then stands up and takes his panties off, now both of them completely naked to the other.

Jaeyun doesn't sit back down on the alpha's lap because the alpha pushes the omega with his hand on his hip to the wall that was next to the armrest of the couch. After that, he gets off the couch and on his knees, right in front of the omega.

He guides one of the omega's hands to his head and one of his legs on his shoulder, the alpha now parallel to the omega's private parts.

Jaeyun had no idea what to expect, what feeling awaited him, but it was never this intense in his mind.

Because as soon as something wet touched his folds, he felt like the leg that was still on the floor would give out and he would fall. Because his knees shook from the feeling, his hips first pushing back into the wall and then to the alpha's face, grinding against him.

At first, he had no rhythm, but after a few seconds he got a hold of himself, the hand on Heeseung's head now gripping his hair tight as the alpha held his hips and helped him move in tandem with his tongue.

Jaeyun felt elated. Like his whole world has been waiting for this to happen. For Heeseung to touch him, to play with him. He feels like a part of him is being reinvented on the spot, by the moment, as he feels the alpha's wet tongue lick into him.

After a moment, Jaeyun realizes that one of Heeseung's hands is moving from his hip, gliding softly to his private parts and stroking it's way next to the tongue. Jaeyun looked down and saw the alpha look at him before he feels a finger enter him, as the tongue moved upwards and touched a bundle of nerves that scratched an itch in his brain so good that his free hand that wasn't in Heeseung's hair banged on the wall next to him, his mouth releasing a moan so sweet and sound, Jaeyun momentarily bit his lip in thought that maybe some servants heard them.

But that was unlikely, since they were kind enough to leave them there. And he was not close to a door. He was surrounded by paintings and windows and, since they were on the second floor, nobody could see them. The windows just omitted light into the room.

Jaeyun's body moved on it's own, meeting with the alpha's finger that, soon after, turned into two. The tongue had not stopped lapping at either the bundle of nerves (Jaeyun's mind supplies him of a word he learnt from mrs. Sooyoung: the clitoris) or at his folds, lapping at the liquid that collected itself there.

Jaeyun knew pleasure when it came to heats. He knew of them through his fingers and his fingers only. But this was so much different. There was so much going on, in his head and in his body.

He is pretty sure the room will be smelling of his scent long after they are done, and he is sure that this will plague his mind for weeks, even months to come.

He stops thinking when the alpha adds a third finger and curls it as the other two keep on prodding at his sweet spot and at that moment, Jaeyun sees everything and nothing. He feels it too, from his toes to his hairs on his head. He feels it and he moans loud, gripping the alpha's hair as his hips grind even faster, the tongue in his folds lapping faster.

He feels so elated that when his release hits him, his voice reaches a different volume, exhaling and yelling all at once, gripping the alpha's hair with both his hands as he rides it out. His breathing is fast and his eyes are damp (he hadn't cried but he had come near to it), his lips are bitten and most probably red. His hair is in a state he won't think about.

His grip on the alpha's hair is lessening and his grinding hips are slowing down as he comes down from the high, breathing still uneven.

He looks down at the alpha that detaches himself from Jaeyun and he sees the shiny slick all over his mouth and chin and nose and his right hand. He sees the alpha reach over for a white cloth that was put on the armrest, wiping his face and hand and standing up with it.

Once both his feet are on the stable ground, Jaeyun looks up at him in the eyes, his hands going back to his hair and bringing him in for a kiss. 

Heeseung throws the cloth back on the couch as both his hands touch the omega's lower back and with that, Jaeyun's sensitive and overstimulated core touches Heeseung's, the member still hard and big.

Jaeyun had no time to think of the size of it before, because the alpha moved so quickly and so efficiently and made this about him that he had not taken a second look there. Now, when he feels the hardness of it, he can assure himself he had not known that he would be met with something that size.

He puts distance between them and looks down at the member. The alpha stops him with his voice, "We can just lay down on the couch. You don't need to do anything," he says meeting eyes with the omega.

Jaeyun thinks for a split second how he should most probably pleasure the other, but Heeseung stops him from thinking more, "I want you to rest now. This has been as pleasurable for me as it was for you. Trust me," he says, stroking a thumb over his face.

Jaeyun hums, "But you hadn't..." He doesn't finish, doesn't know how to. What to say or how to address it.

Heeseung shakes his head, "Rest," he says, guiding him to the couch, "I shall leave for the bathroom and shortly return," he says taking a white cloth with him.

Jaeyun is obedient as he sits on the couch, breathing still uneven, as he follows the alpha's naked form.

A few minutes later, Jaeyun feels warm hands greet him and lips kissing his neck.

He doesn't think of what just happened and how many steps were crossed in the past half an hour.

He just thinks that what just happened had to happen again. And again.

-

Chapter Text

He witnessed the day pass into night, the Sun being replaced by the moon, all while slowly and lazily moving around on the small couch, two bodies touching together. They were both still naked, but covered in layers of blankets, enjoying the cool air of the night.

"I used to tell Riki," Heeseung started, hands around Jaeyun's waist as the alpha lay on Jaeyun's stomach, Jaeyun's right hand carding through the alpha's hair, "about you when I visited him," he smiles, "And I always had to promise him that I'd show you to him once. And he was always so eager to see the paintings of you."

Jaeyun laughed, "He is a delightful child. Very happy and energetic," he says, his hand moving to hit the alpha's head lightly as he felt the alpha's tongue lick his stomach. Jaeyun then sighed, closing his eyes, "Although I do have to wonder. Why did you not mention knowing me?"

Heeseung prompts himself up on his elbows, Jaeyun's hands fall from the alpha's hair to his own stomach, the two making eye contact, "A few reasons," he says, sighing, "One of which was that I was sure you'd be absolutely flabbergasted when you saw this collection of mine."

Jaeyun smiles, "It did freak me out when I entered. It kind of is creepy seeing my face everywhere," he says, smiling as the alpha buries his face in the other's stomach, groaning. He likes this. He likes how relaxed they are.

"I apologize. This does look rather psychotic. I had been thinking of you ever since that night ended. You were my muse, in some way," Heeseung says, looking up at the omega. 

Jaeyun stares at him, "Why have you never mentioned that night? I had been waiting, from the moment I met your eyes at the funeral, to see a glimpse of recognition. Instead I saw nothing," he says, plopping his head back, their eye contact broken.

It was silent and still for a moment, Jaeyun was staring at the white ceiling, a blank expression on his face.

If Heeseung had just told him earlier. If he had just mentioned it. He would have been saved of so much trouble of his mind. He would have known what his affections were earlier too. He would have saved himself some greatly needed time.

He sees a head of black hair enter his view and notices the alpha hovering above him, their eyes meeting.

"I saw you first that day. At the funeral. I saw you and I thought you were my imagination for a moment. But you had to be real. You were talking to Riki and you looked so... majestic. I could have stood there watching you the whole day. Then you saw me and I saw you knew me as well. You had to, your face showed recognition. Later, as the funeral went on, I was seated next to Yeobin. We..."

There was a pause and Jaeyun just stared at him. He didn't want to leave the comfort of the moment but he had a feeling he had to, soon enough.

"He commented how he had seen you that day for the first time and you just blew his mind. He said he felt enchanted by you. As he said it first, as he faced his feelings first, even though they were at first sight, I knew I had to back off. He was a friend and he had given me money once I was in travels. He had been a great support and I had a feeling you'd be better off with him than with me."

Heeseung wasn't looking at his eyes by the end of his speech, he was looking at the pillow Jaeyun's head was resting on. Jaeyun wanted to roll his eyes.

"And at no point did you think of asking me for my opinion?" He asks the alpha, making the other look back at his face, "Did you ever consider what I felt was best for me? For my happiness? I have not been with an alpha since I met you, at my first ball, when I was fifteen. I had not looked at an alpha the same. You set my standard. And even now, I have seen Choi Yeobin's intentions, I know he had to be interested. But you were there, too."

A pause. Jaeyun moves to sit up, the alpha moving away so he could do so. When they were seated, Jaeyun sighed again.

"You were the one who I wanted next to me. From the first ball. Even after you disappeared. Even when you were not here. There were many alphas at our home, asking me for a hand. I had never said yes because I knew you existed. Somewhere. That you were still better. You treated me better. I always compared you to them. You were the one. Choi Yeobin couldn't change that."

As he said that, Jaeyun stood up, picking up his underwear, "You'll have to help me put my corset on," he says, bending over to take it.

Lee Heeseung stands up, takes the corset from his left hand and pulls it to him. They are standing in the middle of the room now, their bodies close, "I slept with two omegas while on my travels," the alpha starts and Jaeyun opens his mouth, his eyes wide as he stares at him.

He had expected the alpha to sleep with omegas. Most alphas their age have been active enjoyers of intercourse from a young age, if they were not betrothed or something similar. He had not expected the alpha to say it like that though.

"One was a woman, many years older than me. A few friends and I were staying over at her manor since she had been so kind as to grant us rooms there. She had drank too much, I have done so as well. We started talking and she asked me about my art. I talked about you. You are my art. And she said I deserved someone real. Someone who will be there. And for that moment I believed her. Next morning I woke up and immediately felt like I have betrayed you. You have given me nothing but inspiration and I betrayed you.

"I stopped painting for some time after that. I was so disappointed in myself I stopped meeting with my friends altogether. Two days after that night, I packed my things and left the manor without my friends. I went on alone once again, like I was 18," he says.

They are standing close enough that Jaeyun can feel the emotions in his big eyes, his words ringing loudly in his ear.

The corset he had thought of putting on had been tossed to the side as the alpha takes his underwear from his other hand. He takes it in both his hands and straightens it. Heeseung gets on his knees, eyes on the pair of underwear that he opens so Jaeyun could slip his legs in it.

"That had been my deepest point yet," he said as Jaeyun put a palm over his shoulder and lifted one leg into the leg hole of his panties, "And I had started reading mindless poetry then, to try and get me inspired. It had done little to nothing. I felt so bad about what I did to you I thought of sending you a letter of apology. I did write it, though I never sent it. I kept it with me, to remind me of my guilt. Then I have confided in Yeobin after meeting him in a town not far from here."

Jaeyun was standing above him as he slipped the cloth over his private parts and secured it over his hips. His hands stayed holding his hips in place for a moment longer before they moved to his thighs. His thumbs circled around the flesh, his eyes now looking up at Jaeyun.

"He had offered me a place to stay at and I accepted. I had told him of what has been going on and he had been supportive enough to give me money to get back on my feet. Eventually I got over my guilt and started painting again. This time, I was painting nature. I told myself that by betraying you I couldn't paint you anymore. Out of respect. But then another omega came into my life, a boy your age, I believe."

Heeseung then picked up the dress he had arrived in, without the part that cinched his waist. He stood up on both his feet and started fumbling with the material.

"He reminded me of you so much. His name was familiar, he was your age, he smelt similar to you. His hair was similar, his height was too. But his eyes and his smile were different. You had joy in your eyes and he had experience. He had been under the worst circumstances this world could have given him. And so, since I had some money, I could afford a room for two. We shared a bed a couple of nights at first, then we started to be intimate."

The dress was slipped onto Jaeyun's frame lightly, his hands going through the holes for his arms as he listened to the alpha. The alpha's fingers were touching up his sleeves, making sure they look neat.

"He was experienced and he thought me a lot about the omega body. How to give pleasure and how to receive it. We had a good time for a while. It was nice coming back to a room with someone in it. Not having to be alone every night. At that point, I thought I had forgotten you. Even though I slept next to a boy so much like you for so many night. One of those nights, I returned to the room and he was not there. Nor was his stuff. He only left me a note saying 'I am not him.'

"Had no idea what he was saying before I realized I wanted to erase you so bad I started to outright rejecting him in some ways. I had then realized that my feelings for you had never stopped. That you have stayed with me, in my heart, in the horde of my paintings, from the moment I saw you. So, after a time of thorough wallowing, I put myself back on my feet and started painting again. You see that picture with you in that red dress?"

Heeseung points at one Jaeyun had not noticed before. It was right next to the ones of nature, and he doesn't know why he had not paid attention to it before. It stood out from the rest quite obviously so.

"That is what I painted after he left. It was a painting of you as well, but this one was different. This was how I imagine you'd have changed. I imagined you would have been wedded by then. It was way past your first season and an omega like you, so beautiful and kind, you would have found an alpha. Someone who'd better protect you and care for you than me.

"You are in a red dress, which symbolizes your maturity, and you have a ring on your finger. If you look longer, you can see that your belly is slightly protruding. I imagined you pregnant. With a child of another alpha. As crazy as it sounds, it got me back on my feet. Because I at least knew you were cared for. Not in my arms but in some that were safe for you."

Jaeyun looks from the painting to the alpha. He sees every detail he is describing. Jaeyun thought of what the alpha must have thought since then. Because Jaeyun had never been with an alpha. Jaeyun had never been pregnant.

"It crushed me, but it healed me. And when I saw you at aunts funeral, without an alpha, for a moment I was giddy. I felt like I had a chance. Then I talked to Yeobin and... He is everything I am not. Wealthy and healthy and stable. You need an alpha like Yeobin. Not one like me."

Jaeyun inhales sharply. He purses his lips out and stands with crossed arms. Then, he kneels in front of the alpha and picks up his underwear. He also straightens it out and waits for the alpha to put his leg inside.

"You were always in my mind. Even when I didn't think of you, you were always there. Lurking. When I saw you, that image of you widened and you were, once again, real. You were there, with your body and soul. But you paid no attention to me. Yeobin did. I felt like I have been waiting for nothing my whole life, and since Choi Yeobin was interested, I guess I indulged him. But he isn't you. No matter how much my mother likes him. No matter how much he likes me. I like you more. I always have."

He stands up with Heeseung's white shirt in his hands, looking into the older's eyes. He averts them to his tan chest and neck and than leans in. He smells him and kisses him on his scent gland, something neither of them did for the entire duration of their intimate time. Then, he slipped the shirt onto the other.

"You had always been my center. I have waited. So long. And seeing you not remember me broke me a little. My whole heat and pre-heat, I felt so lonely. Not because I wouldn't have no one but because I wouldn't have you. I need you," he says his arms resting on the alpha's shoulders, their eyes meeting.

The alpha smiles, "I need you more. You are my absolute everything. I hope you understand."

-

Jaeyun was only in the dress and his underwear as he sat on the alpha's lap, his hips grinding on the other's as they kissed passionately. Heeseung held his hips and guided them, sometimes squeezing the flesh which made the omega whine between the kisses.

"Sometimes," Heeseung starts between the kisses, "I couldn't help myself. I was in your presence and I needed you to know my feelings. I dropped subtle hints but I think they were too subtle," he smiles as Jaeyun laughs into the kiss.

"Too subtle," Jaeyun repeats, "I had not a clue," he kisses him with tongue, both his hands in the alpha's hair, tossing it around and playing with it, "You were too loyal to Choi Yeobin for me to see anything."

Heeseung laughs at that, too, his face scrunching at the thought, "I would rather you not mention another alpha when my lips are on yours," he says giving a small nip to the other's lower lip.

Jaeyun smiled but put distance between them, "As much as I would have liked for this to continue," he starts, slowly getting off the alpha, "I must return to my house. Everyone must be worried."

Heeseung sighs but nods, "As you wish," he says, getting up as Jaeyun does as well.

Jaeyun looks around and picks up his corset. He tosses it to the alpha and takes the dress off, "Come on. I cannot put it on myself alone," he says, putting the dress aside and making his way to Heeseung.

As Heeseung helps him put the garment on, he asks, "Should we be together in public?" Heeseung prompts, quiet voice into the dark room.

Jaeyun thinks. He isn't sure that now is the right time for his parents to know of this. He is sure his brothers will be informed, but his mother could live without knowing this. If she were to know, she would fuss too much. Either about Jaeyun being with someone whose interests she dislikes, or about the improper way of meeting.

He is sure his mother, if she knew the truth, would be astounded. For her, marriage comes first, than even a slight touch, a kiss. Later, only when needed, intercourse could be insinuated. If she knew they had done far more than kiss while unmarried, she would not be their biggest fan.

"I want us to be private for at least a while," Jaeyun says as he guides Heeseung in tightening his corset, "My mother is not your biggest fan and I don't want us to dive into uncomfortableness so soon. I want us to be each other's only for some time."

Heeseung hums at him, "I am alright with that," he says, "I had gathered from how your parents treat you in some interactions. We should enjoy one another for some time in quiet."

Jaeyun nods with a smile on his face, "But my brothers will know," he says, turning back to Heeseung, the alpha still tying the strings on his back, "I must tell them. I cannot keep secrets with them."

Heeseung only lightly laughs, "If you wish to. I shall not be saying anything. My entire staff knows by now, but except for them, I believe I have no one to say anything to."

Jaeyun giggles at the though of the staff knowing. He had always been close to the staff, loved working and spending time with them. He doesn't mind them knowing.

The omega wants to stay longer, alas Jaeyun had to return. He knew his parents and his brothers were to worry.

So, only his dress to cover him out of the room, he walks out, down the stairs to the tea room, and meets eye with a butler.

He feels giddy at that. He liked the help in the Lee manor, and he is not against them knowing. He also feels happy that at least some people know they aren't strangers.

Once Jaeyun walked out, he fanned himself to get the smell of an alpha out of his system. That would not be easy, but he knew his parents would not notice. His scent of vanilla could overpower much, and it cover the traces of patchouli. 

Jaeyun had a safe return home, the warmth of his heart keeping him content until he stepped on his porch and opened the door.

He took his overcoat off and was surprised by seeing his mother run to the front door at the noise.

"Where have you been? I have been worried sick. If Jungwon-ah had not told me your heat had finished, I would have assumed the worst," she says and walks over to him, hugging him.

Jaeyun prays to whichever god there is that she does not smell the patchouli as they hug.

He is also reminded that not even 24 hours ago he had been in his bed, writhing in pity. How much as changed.

"I apologize for not informing you. I had been careless not to let you know, mother," he says, smiling as he takes off his coat, "I had seen mrs. Jang while I had gone to the post to deliver a letter to the Choi manor. We had stayed talking for long."

His mother hums, "I am glad you are alright, that is what matters," she says, "But do not make this a habit. You had me worried sick!"

Jaeyun smiles, "I would never dream of it, mother", Jaeyun says, turning around to the staircase, "I am rather tired so I will be making my way to bed," he says walking up the stairs.

His mother hums before saying, "Alright. But be sure to bathe. Your scent is still very strong and our maid made your bed. You know how comfortable it is after heat," she says and Jaeyun smiles. So she didn't smell the alpha on him.

"Of course. Thank you for worrying. Good night, mother," he says, going up the stairs.

She stands there and watches him walk up, "Night, dearest," she calls out and smiles lightly. She was glad her son was safe.

-

Once he's bathed, he makes his way to Jungwon's room, seeing that Sunoo was already there on his bed. At first, they don't notice him.

"Don't think about it too long, Jungwon-ah. He loves you and he will not stop soon, I assure you," the older says, laying on his front and looking at Jungwon who was sitting by his desk.

"I am aware of that. That is not what worries me. I just hope he knows how much I love him," Jungwon says and folds some paper with something written on it. Most probably a letter to the alpha.

Then, Jaeyun makes his presence known by knocking on the youngests door. They both turn to look at him and smile.

"Jaeyun-ah, where have you been? Mother had been worried sick," Sunoo says and Jungwon nods.

Jaeyun just smiles at them, "I have something to tell you both," he starts and first looks at Sunoo, "You know less, so I'll start from you."

Sunoo furrows his brows, "I know less? What does Jungwon know that I don't?"

Jaeyun smiles, "The night I went into heat. I had been in the garden and had a brief interaction with Lee Heeseung. We had not talked much but there was some tension between us. So I told Jungwon that I'd be apologizing to him today after I drop the letter off at the post office."

Sunoo is staring at him. His eyes are as wide as they had ever been, "You what?" He turns to Jungwon then, "How could you have not told me? I had been out of the loop for your whole heat!" Sunoo whines and Jungwon laughs.

"Relax. Jaeyun said nothing happened. He went to apologize today to Lee Heeseung for maybe making him uncomfortable," Jungwon shifts his gaze to Jaeyun, "But if I can read between the lines something else happened today there."

Sunoo is still staring wide at the two of them before all his attention is on Jaeyun. Jaeyun was smiling big, a clear sign something good happened.

"I came to apologize but it escalated quickly. He started walking away from me at first, when I went to apologize, but then I followed him, and somehow I got myself in his painting studio and," he takes a break to see the two staring at him, Jungwon with a wide smile and Sunoo still in shock, "There were paintings of me. Lots of them. From my first ball"

Both gasped, Sunoo got off the bed and stood up, staring at Jaeyun in disbelief.

"He remembers and he didn't say anything!"

-

After a few too many minutes of explaining, both his brothers were still in shock. It all happened so suddenly and out of nowhere. From the realization that the alpha knew, to why he did not say anything, to their time together. Their kisses and touches.

"Good lord," Sunoo's one hand is over his heart and the other is on his head, "Sunghoon and I have been courting for who knows how long and we have only kissed a handful of times. Nothing more! And you make such a step in a day?" He asks eyes still shocked.

Jungwon was still standing, one hand on his hip and the other over his mouth, "I have not even kissed Jongseong and I'm the one who is engaged! We are doing everything in the wrong order!" He says and Jaeyun has to laugh, laying down on the bed as he does so, smiling.

He feels safe and cared for. By his brothers, by an alpha. Everyone who is supposed to know, knows. 

Then his brows furrow. He sits up, his elbows propped up, eyes on Sunoo, "Sunghoon had kissed you? When had that started?"

Sunoo rolls his eyes.

-

The Cho manor is standing tall in front of him. Too tall, if he were being honest.

Layla already ran away from him and to Saimase, the two dogs enjoying each other as they haven't seen one another in quite some time.

He stalls for a bit. He thinks of Iseul and her warm smile. He liked the girl and he is happy to see her again. He hopes in good health. And he knows the staff of this estate and their children, the ones he played with on some afternoons.

And Cho Yeobin of course.

After the talk with Heeseung, his perception of the alpha changed. Not in a good or a bad way. It was just different. Because before, while Jaeyun was certain the alpha had at least liked him some amount, he still wasn't sure were his advances returned or not.

Now he is sure he could never agree to anything on the part of the alpha. He couldn't say yes to flirtatious remarks and interestingly phrased sentences. But he couldn't tell him that it was because he was now certain of his returned feelings of another alpha.

Him and Heeseung agreed to keep quiet for the time being, and he respected that decision. So, if he started acting so differently, would the alpha notice? Well, even before Jaeyun was not very comfortable with the flirtations, but he had never actually rejected them. Would he do that now? Would he feel guilty if he would not reject those remarks?

His mind is taken back to the present by an exclamation of his name, a smooth voice calling out for him. He meets eyes with the alpha he had just been thinking about.

Right. Well he shall do as normal as he can manage, he supposes.

-

Iseul was doing better.

Yeobin says that the last few days she has even been able to sit for longer and walk around the estate.

Jaeyun lightly joked that that was because Jaeyun was not with them, but the alpha took it seriously and reassured him that it was not because of that, but rather the weather had been nicer and nicer these past few days.

And Jaeyun had to agree that that could as well be a cause of her good state. Outside, it was sunny and warm, but not hot. He came in a dress with shorter sleeves and a vest over it, since the night could be colder once he returned. He was happy because of the weather being so sunny. He felt the chilling days of winter were finally melting into spring.

Him and Iseul both agreed that spring was their favourite season. To Jaeyun, it was a time of bloom and rebirth. How everything bounced back into action as the temperatures increased. How people start spending more time outside because of it. And he liked the fact that it was as such. He liked their town in springtime. Especially with so many balls coming up.

Iseul agreed with him on that, but it was also her birthday in spring. They laughed as the girl shared some of her favourite birthday stories. She was always loved by the people of the estate, especially her brother.

Jaeyun shared his own birthday stories with her. How his birthday was always spent inside, a dinner with his family and some of their friends. While Sunoo's was hosted in their garden, on a sunny June day, him and Jungwon endured the long, dark days of the fall and winter months. He supposes that Jungwon's birthday was the coldest, but his was the rainiest. He could not decide if he liked it or not.

That made him wonder, the thought of birthdays and the passage of time and age.

"Iseul," he started, the two sitting on a bench in the garden, "Your season has past, hasn't it? Were you even there for it? If you don't mind me asking," he said, looking at the girl that smiled gently.

She put her cup of tea down on the small table, spilling a bit of it to the side. Jaeyun pulled a cloth from the side and patted the wood down so it would not absorb too much. He also patted the cup and the little plate with it, so it wouldn't stain.

Iseul cleared her throat, "My season past, that is correct," she starts, meeting eyes with the other, "But I had been ill back then and travels to town were rare. Brother and I concluded that it would be best to wait for a better time here. So I had not gone to any of my season balls."

Jaeyun's eyes widened, "Had you been at any ball? Ever?"

She laughed at his expression, "No, unfortunately I have not," she says, "Tell me. Am I missing a lot?"

Jaeyun's mouth was wide open. He had not thought of this. Iseul had been couped up in this house since her condition worsened, and she has been as such since before her season. 

"Only the most special events of the year!" He says, standing up. He pushes their cups to the center of the little table so they would not fall on accident, "Come here," he told her, opening his arms for her. She stands up slowly and puts her hands in Jaeyun's.

The older omega leads them over to a small clearing and asks, "Have you danced like this before?" He asks her.

Iseul hums, "Yes. But it has past some time since I have actually danced," she says and gets into position, Jaeyun guiding her.

They danced while laughing the best they could, the best Iseul remembered, before Jaeyun started asking more questions.

"When was the last time you were in town?" He asked, his fingers grazing the girl's hair at the back. It was unusual for two omegas to dance a dance of a couple, but they managed just fine, if Jaeyun was the one you asked.

"One summer a few years back, brother lead me to town with some of our staff. We went to lady Lee, who invited us for tea," she said, smiling lightly, "It was short but sweet. I would give anything for an evening like that to happen again."

They part and bow to each other, their dance seemingly done, Jaeyun pulls out his hand and offers it to the girl who takes it and they make their way back to the bench.

"Maybe you could come to the town again? Since the weather now is so nice it would be perfect," he says, smiling as Iseul's eyes shine.

"I would love that," she says and then lowers her head, "But I shall ask brother first, and he could be apprehensive."

Jaeyun shook his head, "Need no worry," he says, "I shall talk to him then."

-

Just as such, the day comes to an end, creeps onto them, on his time with Iseul. He put the last of her night pills next to her and she drank them, before Jaeyun opened the blanket and she slid under it, her head laying down on the pillow.

"Today was very nice," she told him, "I am glad you are back, Jaeyun-ah," she says and he smiles. He fluffs the blanket around her and smooths the back of his hand over her forehead.

"We share the same sentiment," he says and then straightens, "There is a glass of water next to you and the pills for the morning. Mrs. Kwon will wake you up and I shall be there by 8 of the morning. Sleep well, Iseul-ah," he says and exits the room, going to find Layla.

He was ready for a good night of sleep. 

On his way to the garden, he saw the open door of a study. Cho Yeobin's study. He thought it would be the best time to ask the alpha about Iseul going to town with him.

He knocked gently on the door, soft enough not to startle the alpha sitting by the table and firm enough to be heard.

The head of black hair shot up, meeting eyes with his for a moment before the alpha averts them and clears his throat, pushing some of the papers in front of him to the side. He put the pen he was holding down and stood up, going to meet the omega at the other side of the room, his face turned into a smile.

"Hello," he says, smile warm and gentle, "Leaving?" He asks as Jaeyun hums and looks around the room.

Plenty of books and storage, plenty of papers. Two chairs on one side of the table, one on the other. A plant or two by the window. It was a regular office, he had to admit it wasn't anything special.

"Yes," he says finally, "I was just about to find Layla and head home. Care to find her with me?"

He wanted his sentence to suggest less of anything that would be considered romantic or in any way giving, but he wanted to talk to the alpha. He hoped that what he was going to say would stray him away from thinking anything more on his part.

The alpha hummed, "Of course. Lead the way," he said, the omega opening the door to them both. It was in a joking manner, that much Jaeyun can tell. This was his house, the alpha should lead the way. But Jaeyun feels like he knows this place good enough to know where he's going, so he takes the lead through the halls.

Before he had said anything about wanting to talk to the alpha about Iseul, the alpha asks a question first.

"How have you been? No one hurt from the war? How was your.. your heat?"

Jaeyun was quiet for whole of a second before clearing his throat. It wasn't uncommon for alphas to ask omegas these questions. But those alphas were close to them in a way that the omegas have talked about their heats to them. This was uncommon for Jaeyun in general, and he hadn't talked about his heats with Sunghoon even (an alpha he sees close to, but uncomfortable to talk about these things (even thought Sunghoon did help him get safely home once his heat hit)).

"The battle had been long but not one person I know had passed away, so I am grateful for that. And the town is grateful for the soldiers who fought for us and are grieving those who died doing so," he debated should he comment on his heat. He thought of an answer that would suit both his heat and the battle, "It had past. That is what matters."

The alpha hummed, taking that as an answer that he could get, not asking more elaborate things on that.

Before the alpha could say anything else, Jaeyun looks up at him, "I had talked to Iseul today and she had told me that long has past since she had been to our town," he says and the alpha hums, scrunching his eyebrows.

There was a moment of silence as they finally reached the garden and Layla ran to him.

"And, well, she has expressed how she missed that moment. I had offered her a day with me in the town, however she had asked me to talk this through with you," he says, a hand carding through Layla's fur on her head.

The alpha sighs. It takes him a moment before he looks down at Layla as well, his lips pulled into a thin line before he started talking again, "I don't think it is a smart decision. She is of weak health and the town could be too suffocating for her."

Jaeuyn hummed, "I see," he said, not wasting time, "However the benefits of social life could do her good. She does not need to leave her carriage, if she so pleases, but I believe it will be good for her. She had been in here for quite a while, don't you think?"

The alpha hummed at that, taking it into consideration. It seems like Jaeyun, with a simple few sentences, changed his mind. Though not completely, "Maybe sometime next week. But even then I shall be with her and watch over her. And I hope you know that that would be expected of you as well?"

Jaeyun nodded, "Of course. I want to spend time with Iseul in the town. I grew up there and I could show her around. In her wheelchair, on foot or in a carriage. However she pleases."

And that was that, because the alpha hummed and nodded, bidding him goodnight and getting back outside. Jaeyun made his way to the waiting carriage, ready to head home and sleep in his warm, comfortable bed. 

-

Or maybe not his bed, he supposes.

He got home to everyone except his waiting mother already asleep. He assured her that his day was a good first day back and that the woman needn't worry. She was satiated by that, so much he could tell, that she went to sleep soon.

Jaeyun waited for an hour, maybe some minutes more, before he silently made his way out of his room. He saw that not one of their staff was in the doorway, all gone to their home or to their sleeping quarters in their manor.

He puts on a pair of shoes before walking outside.

It was dark, dark enough for nobody to recognize Jaeyun who wore a green coverup for his night dress. This late at night he was sure he would not encounter anyone who he knew. So, with a soft closing of the door and the final making-sure he was clear, he headed to a house a few blocks from where his was.

The Lee manor.

He made his way there silently and seemingly on tip-toes as he walked the pavement. His heart was beating as if he was a misbehaving child sneaking out to get candy from a stranger while their mother was looking away. A smile crept on his lips at the thought, his eyes closing at the thrilling feeling. He felt alive, even now, at the dead of night.

Once he was at the door he knocked once, quietly, then once, more loudly. He hoped that the alpha himself were the one to open the door.

As he stood there, he looked around the street and admired how empty it was. Rarely was it this peaceful. Maybe Jaeyun should do this more often, get outside in the dead of the night and wonder around. He would love the feeling of the air, maybe just a bit warmer, no his skin.

The door was opened and the scent caught him first, his eyes soon after meeting the grin on his lips. It was Heeseung himself, and Jaeyun had to smile as well.

Before a word could be uttered between them, they both leaned in for a kiss, both eager as ever.

The kiss was fast and haste. Jaeyun was gripping the cover over his chest to keep himself warm with one hand, as the other shot to the back of the alpha's neck. The alpha opened the door wider as both his hands made their way to the omega's waist.

The kiss turned more passionate as the omega leaned forward and with his body into the older's space, their chests touching. The hand that was over his cover up moved around and held the alphas arm, bringing him closer.

"I had missed your touch," Heeseung said into the omega's ear as they parted, the omega shivering before kissing him again.

"And I? I had missed you so dearly," Jaeyun says, moving a hand to rest on the alpha's jaw, pulling him close and smelling him more.

The alpha moved them both inside and closed the door behind him.

The two stayed in the doorway for a moment longer, still kissing and exchanging soft sounds.

"I think I should show you my room," the alpha says, eyes closed and mouth on the other's neck. Jaeyun had to bite his lip to not let out a loud sound, the feeling of warm lips on his neck delicious.

"Well, only if it has at least a dozen paintings of me. If not, I'm not so sure about it," Jaeyun says back and smirks as he feels the alpha's smile grow on the skin of his neck.

"Oh no, what shall we do?" The alpha plays along, "My room is void of your face. It is waiting for the original to grace it with it's presence. Will you be so kind as to grant it it's wish?"

Jaeyun had to pull himself away from the alpha to let out a quiet laugh. He felt so silly doing this, in the middle of the night, in somebody else's house. He feels like a young omega all over again. Seven years in the past, with only the care for himself was present. 

Something in him dances as the alpha pulls his hand and they make their way up the stairs on their toes, quiet not to alert anyone.

Once they reach the door to the alpha's room, Heeseung opens it and let's the other inside.

The omega looks around only for a moment, eyeing the cabinet and the wardrobe. Then his eyes land on the bed in the middle of the room and his lips curl. He meets the alpha's eyes, the ones that had been staring at him for far too long now, and he marches to him, pulling him down and kissing him, their lips rough over the other's as they tried to find a rhythm. 

Once they did, their bodies moved with their lips, hands going around and exploring. While Heeseung set his hands on the omega's waist, Jaeyun did so on the alpha's chest, fingers fidgeting with the buttons of his blouse.

The alpha recognized the action and lead them to the bed, still in the same position, the omega hitting the bed with the backs of his knees. Jaeyun felt it and pulled his hands off the alpha's chest, the alpha stepping away from him.

He took off his dress coverup and turned around, asking for help with his dress and corset.

The alpha obliged, untying the strings with his fingers as his lips kissed the back of his neck and his upper back, the omega smiling at the feeling.

Once he was close to naked, he turned around and eyed the alpha, "Awfully too much fabric, won't you agree?" He said and smiled as the older chuckled, shrugging his shoulders as the hands that were on his chest returned, unbuttoning the final buttons.

Soon, the alpha was very similarly close to naked as Jaeyun, and they resumed kissing, the alphas hands holding the omega's face still as he kissed him, leaning in as much as he can. Jaeyun hummed in satisfaction, his hands resting on the alpha's elbows, holding himself by them.

Then, as the alpha let go of the omega's face, Jaeyun pulled him by the arms on the bed, Jaeyun crashing on it with his back and Heeseung hovering over him. Their lips were pulled into smiles and their bodies breathed in sync, eyes roaming each other. Once the eyes set on the other's, Jaeyun laughed and pulled the alpha down by the neck, crashing their lips together.

It was a slow dance. Their lips molded into a perfect unity, fitting together just right. They moved slowly but with passion, Jaeyun's hand tugging at the hairs on the back of the alpha's neck.

After a few moments of just that, Heeseung's hand started wondering around the omega's body more, caressing the omega's legs and thighs, hips and waist. His hand came in contact with his underwear and he tugged, Jaeyun lifting his hips to help him take it off.

"What do you want us to do?" Heeseung asks him, his hand trailing Jaeyun's hip, the light touch sending shivers up his back.

"I am not familiar with this. You lead and tell me what we'll be doing," he says and then after a moment adds, "Please?"

Heeseung smiles at him, "Gladly," he says and his hand moves upwards and to the omega's face, his hands touching his face gently as his elbows dig into the bedding next to Jaeyun's head.

They kiss for some moments longer before Heeseung parts their lips and his smile grows, "How did you like what we did last time?" He asks and the omega blushes. Even though they are naked now, about to repeat what they did, the thought of that still makes him fluster.

"It was alright," Jaeyun says with a teasing smile before continuing, "But I would have liked touching you as well," he says and takes a quick glance down at their private parts touching.

Heeseung smiles, kissing the other on the lips shortly, a small peck before he nodded his head, "That could arranged," he says and Jaeyun nods at him, as if saying he's listening to him, "There are a few ways you could do that, if you wish so."

Jaeyun nods again, smiling as his hands wrap around the other's neck, "I'm listening," he says, his tongue grazing his teeth. He was hungry for the touch, and he couldn't wait for it.

"You could use your hand," the alpha starts, "But I must admit I am not a fan of that. Hands get far too messy," he says, scrunching his nose. Jaeyun smiles and nods, urging him to go on, "You could wrap your lips around me, make your mouth do more than moan," he says, the smirk on his face disappearing from view as he moves down and kisses Jaeyun's neck softly, nipping and playing with the skin.

Jaeyun's fingers move in his hair, "You like that better than with hands?" He asks, biting his lip as the alpha continues to bite, but now with a bit more power and urge.

After a moment, he pulls away and says into the omega's jaw, "Well, your pretty lips will certainly give me a show," he smirks into the skin, that much Jaeyun can feel, as Jaeyun moans at the subtle crash of their hips. Heeseung really knew how to get him on edge.

"Okay," Jaeyun said, nodding his head, "Why don't we do that then?" He says, seeing the alpha move, his back raising as he parts from the omega's neck.

They stare at one another for a moment before the alpha speaks up, "If you want to," he starts, "And if you are comfortable. The best position for it is with your knees on the floor and that can be quite rough so-"

"Can we put your duvet on the floor? To protect my knees? Or can we do it on the bed?" Jaeyun asks, not sure if those can be helped in this circumstance. He wants to do it. Heeseung makes it sound enjoyable to him and Jaeyun wants to see him as such. As he felt when the older pleasured him.

The alpha nodded, "Sure," he says, sitting up and bracing himself on his knees. Jaeyun follows suit, lifting his body on his arms, his head following the alpha as he stands up and takes the omega's hand, "If it'll be uncomfortable, please tell me. This is supposed to be enjoyable for the two of us. It is to be mutual."

They stare at each other, their eyes glowing. Jaeyun is happy that the other cares so much for him. He is elated. He had heard stories from their governess. She had told them how alpha's could be rough when in sexual positions. But Jaeyun doesn't feel the roughness of the alpha. He only sees his gentless.

"Will do," Jaeyun says and slowly gets on his knees, both his hands in Heeseung's, the alpha helping him get down.

Once he was on his knees the alpha stood in front of him. He stood still for a moment, two, just staring at the omega. Jaeyun could hardly contain his feelings, so he takes the edge of the pair of underwear that was still on the alpha and tugs, gentle enough to not be haste and firm enough to pull them down.

The alpha steps away from them and throws them somewhere away from the two. Then, he positions himself in front of Jaeyun, the bed behind him but him not sitting on him. In a way, this setting was supposed to make Jaeyun the most comfortable. If he found it hard like this, they could try a different angle and Heeseung should sit. If that was bad as well maybe try on the bad. And if he was not fond of that either-

He doesn't get to find out what he wants to think before he feels fingertips on his thighs.

As if Jaeyun had known what to do instinctively, he held the alpha's member in his hand, looking up at him as he put his tongue out and pressed it on the head, pushing and pulling, their eyes never breaking.

The younger saw the slight hitch in his breath, the slight tilt to the side, the flexing of his hand. The alpha was subtle, but Jaeyun could see he was affected.

After a moment and a particular hard press over the slit, Heeseung let out a quiet moan, filling the air around them. Jaeyun suppressed a moan himself, clearly pleased at the sounds coming from the alpha.

His confidence grew as well and it took him that much to open his mouth wider, hide his teeth and take the most he could, his tongue lying in his mouth, lightly licking at the back of the member, not really sure what to do.

Heeseung took that as a sign to instruct him, the omega clearly coming to a halt with what to do. He lifted a hand and rested it on Jaeyun's jaw, gripping it gently, "Open your mouth a bit more but don't remove your lips. And suck. Don't expose your teeth either. Just... suction," he trailed off as the omega did just that.

His lips circled his member so nicely and, after a moment, his tongue started grazing it as well, and soon he was licking at the alpha's cock and sucking, focusing on giving pleasure to him. After a few more moments and only happy sighs and hisses leaving the alpha, Jaeyun bobbed his head experimentally and that gave Heeseung's voice a lilt to it.

Jaeyun knew the alpha liked it. 

So he put all his mind into pleasuring the other, sucking hard yet careful, his teeth not grazing the member, his tongue playing around with the tip.

Soon, the alpha's moans grew and he had to brace himself on the other. One of his hands was on his shoulders while the other was in his hair, asking for a tug. Jaeyun wordlessly pushed the back of his head towards the alpha's hand and Heeseung knew that that was permission to move on his own.

"Tell me if it hurts or bothers you," the alpha says before gripping at his curls tightly and holding him in place as his hips thrust forward, starting off rapidly. 

Jaeyun wasn't sure what he expected but it wasn't this. So, his mouth goes lax for a moment, the back of his throat being hit repeatedly. He moaned at the intensity of the alpha's moves, which seemed to stir him even more. So the alpha moved even more erratic, his other hand joining in his hair, now pushing him down in time for his thrusts.

Jaeyun's eyes well up with tears as his moans increase, mixing with Heeseung's. He feels as though he will ascend. It was so simple but served him so much pleasure.

Not long after the alpha let out an even louder groan that could have been heard by the whole house, but it was clear that neither of them were keen on noticing that.

So, the alpha thrust into the hot mouth even faster, his hands trying to contain the younger all the while he moaned, sending surges of electricity through his body.

After some more thrusts, the alpha takes his cock out of Jaeyun's mouth and jerks it a few more times before white, hot liquid squirts from the tip, ending on the bed cover that saved Jaeyun's knees from being bruised.

The alpha pants, looking down at the omega that seemed out of it, his face red and his lips abused, yet his left hand was cupping his private parts, hips moving and trying to get some friction.

Realizing so, the alpha quickly gathered himself and sat down on the clean bed, before pulling the omega up by the arms, Jaeyun weakly standing up before crashing into the older. The alpha parts his legs and grabs him by the waist, pulling him down and onto his right thigh.

The friction from his private parts touching the alpha's thigh seemed to have done a wonder, the omega moaning loudly before his hips move again, now lead by the alpha's hands on his waist. The omega is braced on his shoulders, gripping tight as his release approaches. 

His hips move more erratically as the moments go by, and by his release, he is moaning and exhaling loudly, clearly enjoying the friction.

-

Two full hours later, Jaeyun is waking up in that bed, the stained bedding covering them as they rested. The Sun has not yet risen but Jaeyun knows his father is often woken up earlier than the star itself, so he sits up and decides it is his time to go.

About a minute passed before the stirring next to him started, a confused alpha waking up and finding a body missing next to him. He looks up and asks, "Going?" His voice is hoarse and deep and Jaeyun wants to stay and talk to that voice until it fades into his normal one.

Jaeyun nods, "I am afraid my father wakes up early," he says and pulls his lips in, taking the underwear from last night and tossing it on.

After that, his corset comes in his hands and he slips it on, before he hears a voice, "Sit on the bed, I'll help you tie it," Heeseung says. More shuffling and then there is a warm body close to him, waiting for the omega to make a move. Jaeyun nods and sits down, adjusting the straps before the alpha's fingers start working on the lace.

In a few moments he is done, and Jaeyun can't bring himself to forget the warm touch.

"I'll go to the washroom to freshen up," he says and walks around, taking his dress and closing a door between them.

As he splashes water over his face he smiles. 

He likes this. The attention and the care. The rhythm that they have with each other. The unspeakable things that connect them. He likes how they seem to have an understanding for one another that breached all grounds.

As he exited the separate room, he sees the alpha pulling a blouse over his head. He also sees the alpha quickly glance at him and smile.

"I'll walk you home," he says, smile light.

And he does. And Jaeyun feels warm all until he falls asleep again in his own bed, now satisfied and sleepy. The sleep doesn't last long, not nearly enough to make him fully function. Yet, he wakes up easily and gets ready on time.

Oh, the wonder of a lovers world.

Chapter Text

Jungwon was always very perceptive. More than most people at least.

He was the first to notice the slight pang in scents, the twitch of eyebrows, the slight shifting of the legs.

Maybe it was a gift he received with birth. His early birth that gave a fright to everyone but him, so now, he will be the only one to notice that fright in people.

Maybe it is something he developed through years. How Jaeyun slightly flinched at the other suiters that came by their house, how his demeanor changed. He was always smiling, with and without the suitors around. But once the suitors were there he had some tells.

Like when he was sitting down, legs crossed and eyes on the young alpha opposite of him. His right elbows was sat atop the arm of his chair or sofa. His right hand reached and fiddled with his earlobe. Almost always. If he wore earrings, he played with them, turned them, felt them between his fingers.

Once the suitors left, he'd exhale quietly so their mother wouldn't notice it. Once their eyes met, Jaeyun'd smile at her, his right hand leaving his ear and interlacing with his left one. 

He'd do that a lot. Fiddle. 

Jungwon knew, since he was always playing in the room where the courting process happened.

Their mother sat at a table near them, always observing. She pretended to read, for the sake of all the alphas, but all of them knew she was only listening. 

And for her act to seem convincing, Jungwon was always there, with some of his toys. Sometimes, Sunoo was also there, head in his palms as he stared at his older brother and a random alpha. He used to giggle to Jungwon how that very alpha seated in front of their Jaeyun could become Jaeyun's. 

Jungwon never said anything, mainly because he knew that those alphas were not what Jaeyun was looking for. Or was interested in. Because of his hand dangling the earring on his right ear, the slight lilt in his voice as he spoke. He was not enjoying the alphas and their conversations.

Through time, it was like their mother also picked up on his little tells, so she scolded him lightly.

"Don't stretch your earlobe that much. You'll rip it and won't be able to wear all the earrings you have."

Jaeyun stopped tugging at his earrings then, opted for playing with his fingers in his lap. Jungwon still noticed.

Because he always looked, always searched.

Maybe his perceptiveness came from mrs. Sooyoung. From the many things she told him while he was still a child.

He remembers when he was four (making Sunoo seven and Jaeyun nine) he had to hear all about how mrs. Sooyoung tried to eliminate Sunoo's slight lisp, or Jaeyun's wide smile that exposed his crooked tooth.

She used to talk to him as she put him to sleep, "You are so quiet, my Jungwonnie," she would say, "Quieter than your oldest brother," she hummed, absentmindedly. Her fingers tickled Jungwon's feet and Jungwon slightly shifted, whining quietly. She would smile, "As much as I like your quiet, you ought be more mischievous as a child," she said.

Jungwon watched her as she walked around and grabbed a blanket, throwing it over her lap, "You are a special one, my child," she would say, "Because where Sunoo is loud and expressive, always demanding attention. And everyone gives him so, but you. Your biggest skill is just that. Sunoo's is his loud personality that, as little as I say it, makes him who he is. A good boy. Not a good traditional omega but a child nonetheless. And your skill is watching. Noticing. Keep doing that with your big eyes. You'll get far with it, I tell you."

Was that the moment that changed him? That opened his already big eyes and made all the details so much clearer?

He could never really tell when it started. He only knows that his eyes notice much more.

So, really, seeing the eyes of his beloved meet with the pair of one Cho Yeobin while they were out to dinner. Seeing the light widen in his eyes, the light glint creating itself in them and then just as soon disappearing.

Jungwon looks up and sees Cho Yeobin's lips quirk up and just as they did, a clearing of his throat and then they seem as though they didn't even notice one another.

Jungwon considers what he knows.

Jaeyun told him, that one time during the briefness of the battle, when Cho Yeobin had gone to the town, that they knew each other from boarding school. That they are at least acquaintances. And Yeobin had said nothing but good things about Jongseong. How he was a good alpha, one that was loved and respected by many. 

When Jaeyun told him that, it momentarily just made him smile, proud and happy of his alpha. But now he notices that there is obviously more to this.

The setting they were at was not Jungwon's fondest, but he would give anything for any kind of evening with Jongseong. He loved spending time with him, how little of it they had.

It was a dinner, a formal one, for all the big heads of the army and their omegas, and, since Cho Yeobin was here, some outside investors to the state as well. He wasn't the brightest in that area, so he had not thought too hard on it.

He was seated to Jongseong's left, the alpha's arm in his even as they sat. In front of them were another pair, Jungwon had not seen them before. They were both on the older side, closer to his parents than to them, so he supposed he would not have known them.

He looked around. Apart from Cho Yeobin, there was no other familiar face at the table. There were several young omegas, but he hadn't recognized any of them just yet.

He turns to Jongseong and sees him smile at something the alpha opposite of them says. Jungwon smiles as well, eyes meeting Jongseong's.

Since the alpha came back, he had lots of work to finish but he made time for the omega. Often they would meet after sundown, the alpha knocking on the doors of their small manor, Jungwon opening it himself to look at the army's general there, often a flower in his hold, making sure that Jungwon sees it and approves of it.

It is a kind, nice gesture. Every time he sees those flowers in his room he thinks of the alpha.

They'd mostly talk, in the garden, in some park, by the table in the dining room. The same table where Jaeyun sat, waiting for suiters that would all eventually get rejected. He thinks of Lee Heeseung and Jaeyun momentarily. He is happy for them, of course he is. All those alphas are finally faced with the one and only owner of Jaeyun's locked heart. How romantic.

Him and Jongseong have not ventured to very deep and meaningful conversations, partially for never being as alone as they like, partially because some things were better written and read, than said and heard. It's easier. At least Jungwon thinks so.

But he feels like tonight, at this dinner filled with glamour and people who don't seem as though they were Jongseong's friends (he seemed closer with more soldiers than this people), something might come out.

Something involving Cho Yeobin, he hoped so. Their exchanged stares had tension. Was it good or was it bad? Indifferent? Maybe it was just two familiar faces recognizing each other. Jungwon doubted that but, that was a question for later. 

Now he has to enjoy a dinner filled with smart talking alphas. At least he sat next to Jongseong. His eyes moved to him again. Jongseong was already looking at him with a light smile. Jungwon smiles lightly at him before a server interrupts their eye lock with a plate being put in front of Jungwon. Ah, the first course.

-

Earlier that day

Jaeyun decided that his free day would start early.

He woke up as usual, early and the dark was still outside.

He quickly bathed and put on something simple, before deciding that he wanted something more from today.

He feels as though Lee Heeseung saw him more undressed than well dressed over the past few nights. So, for that, Jaeyun felt like dressing up.

He walked out of his room and spotted Sunoo's room door slightly open, revealing him sitting by the table and reading with a cup of tea in his hands. His eyes avert to Jaeyun when there's a knock, the younger omega humming and letting him inside.

"How so that you are awake at this hour? On your day off?" Sunoo questions him as he sets the tea to the side, facing Jaeyun completely. 

Jaeyun smiled, "Would you like to play dress up with me?" He asked, slightly leaning on the door as his smile spread, from shy to wide as Sunoo's eyes grew, a gasp escaping his lips as he ran to him.

"I have been waiting for this," he says, hugging him and ushering him out of the room. Jungwon was still asleep, probably getting his nerves steady for the dinner he has to attend that night.

They enter Jaeyun's room and Sunoo opens the wardrobe, "So is today going to be an outing? You two, hand in hand?" Sunoo asks, a smile on his face.

Jaeyun smiles and shakes his head, sitting down at the foot of the bed and flopping back onto it, "We decided to have a very slow day at his house. First we planned to eat breakfast and then just... Spend time with one another."

Sunoo hums. He supposes everyone is different. He liked taking walks with Sunghoon, mostly because Sunghoon doesn't have his own house where Sunoo could visit. If he had they would have most likely been at the base these two entered a long while ago. Sunoo isn't jealous, he's proud. But his affections for Sunghoon are greatly too big for just kisses. His heats say so too (well, his mind during heat. He doesn't utter a sound in the presence of his mother).

He pulls out a dark green dress, one that had layers and layers of soft material on the skirt and a beautiful embroidered pattern at the bust. It was one of the dresses their mother made for them with one of their maids. She was a talented seamstress and this dress was a great product of her work.

Once they put Jaeyun in that dress, Sunoo brushes his hair out and curls it a little, making a mess of short, slightly curly hair on his head. It flattered him much, that Sunoo can tell. He applies some balm over his lips and sends him away like that.

Sunoo sighs as he watches his older brother walk down the stairs before either of their parents wake up, making sure to exit their house quietly. Sunoo smiles.

One day, they'll be together in the open. Not soon, most probably, but they will be. It's a thought he entertains, along with the image of their mother being supportive, their father being proud and the three of them still as close as now. 

He sighs. He hopes their children will be close. One day. He smiles to himself at the thought. He would love nothing more than for the three of them to be happy. 

He frowned then. He wasn't sure if his brothers ever imagined a similar faith. Or was that not their happy future? Maybe Jaeyun really wanted to work more than have his pups. Maybe Jungwon preferred a life without as much responsibility. 

Wait. 

Was that something he even wanted?

-

A light knock at the door of the Lee manor was followed by some grumbling noise and a clearing of throats. Not knowing what to expect, Jaeyun leaned his ear to the door, one hand next to his head on the door and the other by his chest, clutching his cover up. He heard a few voices, one that he recognized as Heeseung.

He frowned. Help was usually the one to open the door for him. Either one of the maids or the butlers. Anyone close to it, that is. His cheeks heat up. Was the alpha so eager to see him he was waiting by the door?

His answer came quickly, the door opening and Jaeyun straightening himself out at the sight of his alpha, tall and proper, a slight smile on his lips as their eyes met.

"Hello, Jaeyun-shii," he said and cleared his throat again. Jaeyun was left confused for a moment, staring at the alpha, before the alpha averted his eyes quickly to his side, which made Jaeyun look behind the alpha.

There stood mrs. Nishimura and her son in her arms, a well dressed maid by their side.

Seems like their morning had different plans than they initially planed.

"Hello, Sir", Jaeyun said as his eyes met the alpha's again, almost on autopilot. He avert his eyes to the omega with the child, bowing lightly, "And hello to you too, mrs Nishimura", he said before smiling at the child, "And good morning to you too, young Sir."

Heeseung moved to the side so the omega could enter, taking off his outer cover up. The alpha took it gingerly and hung it by the door, a maid that was standing by it flustering. Jaeyun doesn't recognize her, so she must be new. He quickly notes that she must not be used to the laid back atmosphere in this manor.

"Hello, Jaeyun-shii," Mrs. Nishimura said, angling her head so Riki could snuggle closer, before dipping on one knee momentarily in curtsy, much as Jaeyun had done earlier.

Heeseung cleared his throat, "Slight change of plan, for this morning, Jaeyun-shii," the alpha started, clearly keeping a small distance between the two. Right. They weren't sure would she approve of this. At first glance there is no reason for her not to, but Jaeyun is an older omega, unmated and unmarried. They did not know if she was lenient in those cases or if she abide the rules.

"How come, Sir?" Jaeyun asked, eyes clearly searching. What was going on? Mrs. Nishimura wasn't the kind to come unannounced. Maybe it is an emergency.

Before Heeseung could say anything, Mrs. Nishimura opened her mouth, "I apologize for ruining your plans but," she cleared her throat, "I must talk to Heeseung-shii. I apologize for coming unannounced but some things need to be dealt with immediately."

She says it so easily, as if there weren't only bad things piling up on that statement.

"Ah," Jaeyun lets out, clear worry in his eyes as he looks from the mother to her child, clutching at him. Jaeyun clears his throat, "Would you like me to look after your son, Mrs. Nishimura? While the two of you talk."

Riki Nishimura perked in his mother's hold, turning to face the omega that was smiling gently at him. The child looked at his mother and the mother smiled, kissing his temple.

"That would be kind of you. But I would like to have and eye on him," she says as she crouches down and lets her son stand. The boy walks to Jaeyun, smiling up at him and talking his hand. Jaeyun's heart melts just a little as he bends at the knees, now at eye-level with the boy, smiling back at him.

"Very well," Heeseung said, watching his brother and his omega from above. His eyes meet Jaeyun's and for a moment, Jaeyun's mind flashes with the thoughts of their nights and feeling of his touches. But only for a moment. Heeseung continues once their eyes avert, "Shall we talk in the tea room? Riki has plenty of room to play in."

-

And so they were, Mrs. Nishimura and Lee Heeseung sitting opposite of each other, two tea cups full of warm chamomile tea sitting between them on small plates, a tray of biscuits between them. 

To the side and by one of the bookshelves, on a small rug were sitting Jaeyun and Riki, Jaeyun indulging and listening to the child talk as he gnaws on a biscuit. Jaeyun is holding some toys as the boy watches them, never averting his eyes to his mother and brother having a serious conversation.

Jaeyun too tried not to listen to the two talk. He wanted their conversation to seem as private as possible, so he let the boy in front of him babble on about whatever so loudly it could drown the two adults at the table. He caught mrs. Nishimura stealing glances at them, sometimes to check on Riki and sometimes to look if he was listening. Jaeyun always just pretended he had not noticed her eyes and went on with playing with the boy.

He was good at listening to him babble and watching over him. It came naturally. He held him softly and talked to him about nonsense and whatnot, making the boy giggle and laugh so softly, so purely. Sometimes his eyes strayed to the alpha that was so focused on the conversation they were having. 

He watched his face, full of concentration and understanding. The slight quirk of his lips as he talked, the eyes that closed once some information got to him. Jaeyun felt selfish, for this conversation must have been important, but all he could think of were the hands holding the tea cup, the finger that was gliding over the edge of it. The chest that moved steadily with his breathing, his spread legs, his slightly curly black hair...

God, was Jaeyun ashamed. He was next to a child, much more his alpha's little brother, and he had such indecent thoughts. He exhales shakily as his face grows hotter in shame, trying to focus of the boy in front of him.

Riki is yapping about something, seemingly very concentrated, his eyebrows furrowing, "And I hadn't known which one it was. Mother said it was a lily, but how come that lily had not looked similar to the one in our garden? Wasn't that then another flower? How could all those different flowers have the same name?"

Jaeyun cleared his throat and bit his lip at his thoughts and focused on Riki, thinking of an answer, "Lilies come in various different colours. They all have something special about them. What colour was the one in your garden and what was the one you saw?"

Riki thought for a moment, "The one in our garden was white. Just white. Then here in the front yard there were ones that had yellow inside and white outside. And in the park there were these very dark ones. How come they all be the same?"

Jaeyun smiled, "Well the one at your home is called a Lililum Roma Lily. It is the most common and the most spread around the world. Meaning there is way more of those lilies than other. The one you saw in the park are the Night Rider Lily. They are one of my favourites. And then the ones you saw here are called Big Brother Lilies. What a coincidence, huh?" He said, winking at the boy.

Riki's eyes shined, "Really? Brother has those lilies? Are they for me?"

Jaeyun giggled, "Sure. Who else would they be for, darling?"

Riki grinned, "I must ask mother if we could plant some Little Brother Lilies, then", he said it so casually, glancing over at his mother momentarily. Jaeyun laughed, knowing that those lilies are not in existence, but happy to have taught the boy something.

"What is your favourite flower?" The boy asked him and Jaeyun thought.

"Well. From lilies, I like the Night Rider ones but also the Splendens Lily. It is one with orange petals that have little brown dots on them and they stretch to make a full turn at the stem. They are quite astonishing. Once I see them I will pick one out for you. And from other flowers, I suppose jasmine. It reminds me of my mother."

Jaeyun says it so easily. Because it is easy. His mind thinks of jasmine, of his mother's scent, because it is safety. It always will be.

He thinks about the flowery scent of his alpha. Of patchouli. Now that he thinks of it, that scent is also climbing up his list. And that flower is too. Because the alpha makes him feel safe as well.

"Oh!" Exclaimed Riki, "Mother smells nice too! Which flower does mother smell like?" He asks Jaeyun. 

Jaeyun thinks briefly. He sniffed the air closer to Riki, as he is still but a pup, smelling fresh but also of his mother. Jaeyun gave himself a moment, absorbing the scent. He was not the best at it, but he decided to give it a try. 

As he put distance between them, he smiled, "Your mother smells just like a rose. A pretty, red rose", he says nodding his head as Riki looks up at him with big eyes.

He laughs at his face, turning momentarily to the two by the couch. The two were looking at them now, both standing up and seemingly about to move towards them. 

Jaeyun, out of respect, stands up as well and bows just a tad bit as the two approach.

Riki looks up as well and sees his mother there, the young boy standing up and sniffing at his mother's dress soon after, "You smell like roses, mother!"

His mother was momentarily in a state of confused shock, mouth open and eyes wondering, before she met eyes with Jaeyun, the younger omega smiling gently at them.

Jaeyun glanced at the alpha arriving shortly after mrs. Nishimura, the alpha going to stand beside Jaeyun and placing a hand on his lower back. Jaeyun tensed, glancing at the mother and son and then at Heeseung. Heeseung nodded, as if assuring him they were fine to know, before both their eyes averted to the duo.

"Why yes I do! Red roses... It's what brought your mother and I together", she said before picking her son up, "And you smell as such too, given that I smother you so much! Too much is it? Should I stop?"

Riki laughed and giggled as his mother nosed at his slowly developing scent glands, tickling him to no end, "No, no! Too much!"

Jaeyun just smiled at the two, cheeks still warm from the hand resting on his back. Soon, it wasn't just the hand, but also the side of the alpha's chest, and then the hand that was on his waist, the thumb of that hand started moving in slow circles and Jaeyun's cheeks were redder yet again.

Jaeyun reminded himself to breath, for what is to come will come. But now is not the time for those thoughts.

"Nurse Sim," Mrs. Nishimura started, catching the omega's attention, "Would you minds putting Riki's coat on? We are off on our way now. Thank you for watching over him."

Jaeyun bowed, "Of course, mrs. Nishimura. Anytime. I like spending time with little Riki, no?" He said, winking at the little boy that was being transfered from his mother's hold to Jaeyun's.

As the two neared the cloak stand in the hallway, Jaeyun heard bits and pieces of conversation from the two.

"You know," Mrs. Nishimura said, "I knew there was something even at the funeral. You two just have an energy when near," she says, keeping her voice low, but certainly not low enough for Jaeyun to not understand.

"You said so, yes," is the only thing Heeseung replies to the woman, seemingly politely smiling at her.

"I mean," she started again, "You two have a look. That you give each other. It is strikingly similar. Affectionate. I am glad for you. However nonconventional this has to be for both of you, I am glad you two are well," she smiles gently, ladylike.

Heeseung nods, "And that we are."

As Riki and mrs. Nishimura exit the manor hand in hand, the little boy waving at the two standing at the doorway with a big smile as his mother gently tugs him in the other direction.

"So," Jaeyun started, "She figured it out?"

Heeseung snorted as he moved the omega out of the way to close the door, "Yes indeed. Said we were far from discreet in her eyes."

Jaeyun hums, "Is that good? That she knows?" He asks, moving back to the tea room and now, with Heeseung's guidance, sitting on the couch.

"I think it is. She seems to like you lots. And like me enough," Heeseung said, rolling his eyes lightly.

Jaeyun smiled bright, "That is unfortunately true. You aren't her dearest, are you?" He said, laughing as the alpha smiled back. Before they venture in less important small talk, Jaeyun asks, "What did she need to discuss with you? If I may ask."

Heeseung hummed, and leaned forward, taking his cup of tea and bringing it to his lips. Jaeyun followed the movement and averted his eyes once the cup was tipping back. He had to stop thinking such dirty thought in the bright of day.

"Mother is sick," Heeseung says, and suddenly nothing is funny or worth laughing at, because Jaeyun's eyes open wide and he looks back at the alpha with serious worry.

"How so? Last time she had been here she seemed in good health," Jaeyun said, putting his palm on the alpha's, trying to comfort.

Heeseung shrugs, "She is getting older. Lady Lee was but 10 years older than my mother. And besides, those things happen quickly nowadays."

Jaeyun is left speechless for a moment, just thinking. Lady Lee wasn't terribly old, but old enough you'd wait for her to die of old age in a couple of years. Paired with her sickness, she was due earlier. 

As far as he remembered, Mrs. Lee did not appear sick. And with that she was not that old either. What kind of sickness? Should he worry? Should mrs. Lee be getting a nurse? Or an assistant of some kind.

It's like Heeseung heard his mind talk, he opened his mouth again, "Riki's mother said she had proper nurse training and she would care for mother. But she will be having less time with Riki. And Riki needs someone to take care of him," he said, leaning back.

Now, the alpha had his arm behind the omega, the two sitting close enough for their clothes to touch. The omega was staring to the front while the alpha was turned to him.

"Are... Are you alright?" Jaeyun asks, slowly lookin up at the alpha. 

Heeseung hummed and nodded, slightly lifelessly, "We were never on good terms. I am not glad she is sick as I do not wish sickness upon anyone. However I do not care a great deal. I am thankful Mrs. Nishimura came to tell me, however I believe that the care of my mother should not be my concern."

Jaeyun hummed. He supposed that made sense. Heeseung's mother was never the one to care for him, so Heeseung couldn't possibly be up to the emotional task of doing that to her. Add to that that his mother's wife was a trained nurse. In theory, she was greatly taken care of.

Then, his brows furrowed, "You said Riki needs someone to take care of him. Had she said something about that?" He asks, leaning forward and away from Heeseung in order to look at him better.

Heeseung sighed, "She asked me if there were some governesses in the town who could come here and help Riki. I said I'd look into it. I know she's secretly hoping it's you, especially after today."

Jaeyun sits there, for only a second too long, staring at the space between the alpha's eyes, zoning out.

The job he wanted was right in front of him.

It was there. Offered. Not to anyone but him. Well, to anyone, but he was probably the first choice.

But there is the impending thought of him already working. As a nurse. As Iseul's nurse. And he couldn't leave her. She depended on him and liked him around! And they have just started preparing her for a little ride around town. Maybe even a step outside. To a park. Maybe bring her up to a ball as well, if she will be willing to go again.

He couldn't take this offer, could he?

He closed his eyes and slumped, hands going to his face. He groans quietly as he feels Heeseung's eyes on him, one of his hands soothingly rubbing circles in his thigh.

"I cannot quit Iseul," he says, moving his hands down his face and to his lap, one of them taking the alpha's hand. They meet eyes as Jaeyun continues, "She... We are friends now. I am not just her nurse. I will not do this to her."

Heeseung hummed, "I suspected that, yes. But I still had to tell you," he says before standing up, "Come on. We'll finish this talk over real breakfast, not just biscuits and tea."

-

Heeseung was faced with many challenges in his life. Surviving on his own was one of them, sure. Trying to paint for a living also one. Even the challenge of trying not to think of Sim Jaeyun as such before they... engaged actively.

He had his fair share of art blocks, where he would have to search far and beyond for inspiration, because without it there might be no dinner for him and his fellow artist friends. He suffered through selling his prized works for money that could give him a somewhat warm bed. 

Briefly, he thought of how many homes have Jaeyun's face on their walls. Mostly, it was walls of fellow artists he met. They appreciated his love of painting that face. He always told them Jaeyun was an omega waiting for him at home, waiting for him to finish his wide search around various towns. That was not true, after all, but those who weren't close to him and wondered, they got the Heeseung that he himself wanted to be.

He wondered how many of them stare at Jaeyun's face, think of his features, how they complete each other so well. How each hair of his eyebrow is in the right place, how each eye lash is so perfectly placed. How his hair moves with the gusts of wind that come through the open window.

And suddenly, his greatest challenge is staying still in his place and not reaching out to touch the omega sitting on the couch, reading some random book, a concentrated look on his face. 

Heeseung had promised himself he'd paint a new painting of Jaeyun. One where Jaeyun gave him permission over. Where Jaeyun was present and could ask how he was doing and was he getting all his angles right.

But now, with him actually here, a few meters away from him, he just wants to touch him, glide his hand from his hair to his cheek to his jaw. Kiss him senseless while taking the dress off carefully as to not tear it.

He tries to compose himself but, he hasn't touched Jaeyun at all for about seven years, only thinking of him. Of his hair and face and hands and body. But now he has him. In his home. On his couch. Near him. Knowing that Jaeyun feels the same.

He really couldn't help it, could he?

He stood up from his place on the stool, overlooking the couch where Jaeyun sat. Jaeyun startled from his peaceful reading and looked up. His eyes were confused as to what was wrong, meeting Heeseung's in question. Heeseung said nothing, marching to him.

The alpha stopped before him, Jaeyun's straight back willing his face to meet the alpha's stomach. He looks up and the two stare at one another for mere moment, Jaeyun's confused eyes staying that way for only a second before the alpha grabs the back of the omega's neck and leans down to meet their lips in a lock.

Jaeyun swears he won't ever get over the feeling of their lips meeting. Of the alpha's hand on the back of his neck, guiding him through the kiss. God, he lived for this now. His small obsession. Lee Heeseung's lips. And the rest of him, naturally.

Jaeyun couldn't keep his hands to himself. He leaned back and the alpha followed, the omega resting his back on the couch as the alpha mounts him. Jaeyun's hands take the job of unbuckling and unbuttoning the pants Heeseung is wearing, not really thinking where this was going.

The alpha tugs the omega back by the neck, their lips parting and their eyes opening to stare at the other.

"What'd you want to do?" Heeseung asks him. 

Simple question, hard answer, Jaeyun thought.

"Well," Jaeyun started, "What'd you want to do?" He asks back, eyes quivering only slightly at the older.

Heeseung playfully rolled his eyes and smirked, "No, we're not doing what I want. I want to do what you want. If you need ideas, tell me. But the choice is yours."

Jaeyun frowned, "Why? Both should be able to choose. Why don't you choose?"

Heeseung's smile only widened. He leaned down to kiss the omega's cheek, "Lovely, lovely omega. You ought to know your alpha is but your servant here. I want to do anything and everything with you. And I believe that wish shall be granted through time. But you decide the order."

Jaeyun's cheeks flush. Heeseung seemed so confident and it made him hot all over.

"Well, share some of those ideas with me, will you?" He says quietly, hands slowly lowering from the pants. 

Heeseung stands to his feet but he is bent, still by Jaeyun's eye level. He puts both hands over Jaeyun's waist and tugs before they both slide to the floor, the omega kneeling in front of the seated alpha.

"Are you interested in the whole thing? Or something similar but of lower impact? Or something easy? Would you like to do the work or shall I, darling?" He asks and asks, big eyes staring at Jaeyun and Jaeyun just wants to be back on the couch on his back, moaning as the alpha has his way.

"I'm not sure... But today is my day off. And it's still day. So we have time for... the real thing?" He asks, cautiously, "If you want, that is", he finishes, averting his eyes to a painting of some beautiful flowers. They're the lillies from the garden, he gathers.

"I want it. I want you. But there are several ways of doing it", he says, thumbs doing circles over his hip bones. 

Jaeyun frowns and Heeseung can't help but think he's incredibly beautiful.

Jaeyun scoots closer and kisses him again, the alpha's fingers clutching at his waist tighter.

They part lips but their faces stay close, "This, I'm afraid, you'll have to choose. I have got not a clue what to do."

Heeseung leans back and grins. Jaeyun, for how little he knows, also knows Heeseung is there to support him and care for him, his body and soul. So really, all shame through the window, he just wants them to touch and feel good.

"Alright, well", Heeseung starts, "I decide that you're in control, on top of me. You decide everything."

And that's about how they got where they are, Heeseung sitting on the sofa, leaned back, one of his hands holding Jaeyun by the waist and the other around his shaft. Jaeyun holds Heeseung by his shoulders, looking down at how slowly he sinks down with his hips, meeting the head of his cock and hissing. He, instinctually, wants to flinch away, but the hand on his waist holds him in place.

So, he decides after a moment to sink further, thinking of the fingers that were in between the lips just minutes prior, opening him up for his alpha. God, his cheeks were heating up. However much he enjoyed it, he was embarrassed how experienced his alpha was and how he wasn't. But he calms himself with the thought that if neither were experienced, they wouldn't likely feel as good.

So his hips sink further, guided by Heeseung's hands, and lured in by Heeseung's quiet hisses and groans that fill his ears. His hips stop mid way, the alpha firmly holding him there. It just began to sting more, the fingers not being enough to stretch him, it seems.

"Take your time", Heeseung tells him and kisses his cheek so tenderly Jaeyun almost melts in the firm hold. He just breaths for a moment, taking in what's happening. Does Heeseung think of him as a prude for not being as experienced? Or is he glad? That no alpha has touched him as such. No omega has either. But this is... This is official. In these positions, he was made. And Heeseung was too.

He closes his eyes tight and sighs. This really wasn't the time to think about his parents. And Heeseung's.

Heeseung notices and his thumb starts stroking circles against his hip again (seems like the alpha took a liking in doing that. He does it awfully often), "You alright, dearest?" He asks and Jaeyun grins.

"Yeah, just thinking silly thoughts", he says. Before Heeseung could question further, Jaeyun takes advantage of their position and shifts lower with his hips, abruptly meeting their bodies closer.

Both of them groan, Heeseung putting his other hand on Jaeyun's waist and holding tight (in the back of his mind, Jaeyun's silly brain offers him a picture of his own body with two hand-shaped purple marks over his waist).

For a moment they don't talk or move, just pant and occasionally moan. Jaeyun decides in those moments that Heeseung had probably thought of him with other omegas in his lap like this. However weird that thought might be, he felt a territorial purr leave his chest as he leaned on his knees more, raising his hips, and then meeting them again with the older's, Heeseung moaning in his sweet voice.

In those moments he decided that his lack of knowledge really doesn't matter, because he's everything this alpha wants. And everything he'll want for however long. As he looked down, moaning, himself, at the feeling, he sees the alpha's face twist into the mixture of pleasure and pain and, for that split moment, Jaeyun knows he could have him eating from the palm of his hand. 

So, celebratory to that thought, he lifts himself up one more time and sinks down again, faster this time, the slap of skin now joining the mix of sounds they were making, along with the squelch of his wet hole, closing around the cock that felt so good and blessed in him.

His back arched as his thighs worked his hips up and down, his hands on the shoulders tightening their grip as the alpha moved his hands from waist to hips to thighs, now just gripping. 

Jaeyun stops once, in the air, the muscle of his hole closing only on the head of his alpha's cock. As the alpha tries to thrust upwards, one of Jaeyun's hands move to his hips and they push lightly, making the alpha stop in his movement.

"You said I was in charge now. Means you should stop rutting into thin air, darling. You do what I say now, no?"

Only god himself and Jaeyun deep down know that the only reason for his confidence is the look the alpha is giving him, one of pleasure so intense. Jaeyun realized that no omega could come near him for this alpha, for they were each other's. Becuase his eyes told him of the admiration and affection, of the impeccable love and care.

He sank his hips down then, giving a ruthless pace to their lovemaking, the alpha moaning along with him and the sound of skin slapping against skin.

It stopped only momentarily when both of them groaned in union, the alpha filling him with seed so deep, Jaeyun felt like he could be nothing but with pups in nine months (that thought closely dissolved, he was not near his heat). And only three thrusts later Jaeyun was squeeling, panting as he rides his orgasm out.

He closed his eyes and soon fell asleep.

After he opened them, there were starts outside the window, a bright, full moon staring at him. He felt the alpha's chest rise and fall under him and, from a little wiggle of his hips he deduced that the alpha fell asleep with him and they were neither cleaned up nor separated.

-

The light breeze of the night calmed Jungwon so much he decided to stay out on the air for a little longer, looking inside from the balcony. Jongseong, who just left him on that balcony, was whipped back into a chat with some older fellow, the man jolly to speak to him about something. 

Jungwon smiled at his alpha. However boring this night was in general, he and Jongseong had fond moments, and had laughed at some of the older couples about their traditional thoughts and beliefs. And Jongseong had told him more than thrice how wonderful his skin looked under this lightly.

He sighed with a smile still present. He could get used to it. To these dinners. However boring they might be, he ate good food and spent half of his time staring at his lovely betrothed. What more could he ask for? Well, maybe a kiss. On the lips. Not his knuckles. But he understood why Jongseong wanted them to take everything slow. They weren't really as familiar with each other as his brothers were with their lovers. They knew each other through the letter but that was about it.

And Jungwon had to admit, the whole thing about waiting, as much as it provided him safety in knowing the alpha respects him, he did really just want a kiss.

He looks away to the gardens on the other side. He sees all the lovely flowers there and sighs. 

Would him and Jongseong have a house much similar to this one? If so, he wanted Sunoo to at least be in charge of tending to their gardens. And he hopes Jaeyun would teach his children some things, not as a governess but as an uncle. Would he even have children? He wants at least three, like how him and his brothers were. He feels like more would be a bit too much for just the two of them.

Well, they'd have maids, of course, but the children need to know their parents.

He thinks to his childhood and how much of it was not with his mother but the maids. Yes, she always was there, somewhere, in the background. But the third child was... they were so relaxed about him. How he'll be fine with most maids. 

With Jaeyun, he knows they were more careful. Even now, they fret over him most. If Jungwon were to announce to them he were to become a governess, they would raise a small fuss, yes, but soon quiet down. But with Jaeyun, they were still worried. 

He sighs. Maybe not three children. Maybe two. However much he loves his parents he knows they should have been more present. That being said, his fear with having his own children is to make similar mistakes to them. He hopes he'll be an alright mother.

He feels the chatter of the inside get louder, so he turns around, to the door that is now opened, and an alpha steps outside with a pipe in between his fingers. Jungwon has seen him through the dinner, sitting alone at the head of the table. He assumed he was the owner of the estate.

He smiled at the alpha politely and the alpha smiled back. He looked like a dear older fellow. Jungwon doesn't remember any kids or omega being mentioned but, really, was he listening to everyone?

"You're Park Jongseong's omega?" He asks and, despite the blush of his cheeks, Jungwon nods, not bothering to correct him that he doesn't have that title yet. He's still not mated or married. He will be, but he isn't.

"Yes, Sir", he says, scooting to a corner, leaning back on the railing of the balcony, leaving space for the older alpha. Enough space for the two of them to talk comfortably over the railing. The alpha smiles again and stands next to Jungwon, turning to the garden and away from the room inside.

"Not really enjoying the night, are you?" He asks him, his smile not leaving his face, making sure Jungwon understands the teasing.

Despite that, Jungwon has to reassure him, "Not at all the truth, Sir. I just wanted some fresh air. And a look at the gardens in quiet." 

He says it as he glances down underneath them, to the roses lining the pathways, and then to the alpha. The alpha hums, "Have I interrupted your peace?"

Jungwon giggles, "Not at all, Sir. Anyone is welcomed to join me", he says and turns around to look at the gardens as well. They are nice, after all.

The alpha hums, "Well I am glad at least one person values my gardens as worthy of attention."

Jungwon shrugs, "If it were daytime, we'd all be in awe of it. Like this, all quiet, some people might find it scary", he says, a light tone in his voice easily told of as joking.

The alpha laughs lightly, "But it's not scary to you, yes?" He asks and Jungwon has to laugh as well.

"Quite the opposite. Dark gardens have an air to them. An air of mystique."

The alpha smirks now, getting just a tad bit closer to Jungwon, "So you wouldn't mind me showing you the gardens now, no?" He asks and, in that moment, Jungwon realizes he was not on the same page as the alpha.

His face slowly paled as he thought over their conversation. Gods, the alpha must have thought he was flirting.

"I am a taken omega, Sir," he says, as a last refute of keeping his honour at least a little intact.

The alpha tsks, "Not yet. You claim to be one but there's no bite on your neck. So really, you are still as free as a bird. And by the way we were talking, it seemed you were... interested."

Now, Jungwon just felt embarrassed. He really didn't mean it like that! "I assure you, that was not my intention and I had not a clue of what you might have been implying!"

The alpha only smirks more and moves closer, half-caging Jungwon to the corner of the railing, "Oh, so innocent. I bet your future alpha doesn't fulfill all your needs, does he? So many young alpha's know nothing of caring for their omega and their needs."

Jungwon, for how uncomfortable he was, hadn't even noticed the hand that hovered over chest. He was so focused on how he could escape this, that the moment the hand came in contact with the dress over his chest, he did nothing but flinch backwards, squishing his body against the railing as far as it went, trying to avoid the touch.

"S-Sir, would you be so kind as to remove yourself from me?" He asks, still trying to keep a somewhat steady voice, and willing the tears away. He cried oh so little these days.

The alpha squeezed the flesh tighter and Jungwon gasped, hands flying up and pushing the alpha off of him. The alpha hit the glass door with his back, not strong enough to break it, but close enough to alarm most of the people inside the hall, including Jongseong and Choi Yeobin who were now talking.

For a second, he was afraid that Jongseong will be mad at him, but he must have figured out what happened from Jungwon's eyes alone because as soon as their eyes met, Jongseong's were filled with worry and guilt.

He rushed to the still closed glass door of the balcony and he opened them, the older alpha laying down and just about to get up.

Jungwon is still standing in the corner of the balcony, back pressed over the railing. He looked scared, from what Jongseong could gather.

He spared a glance at the man standing up, before he looked back at Jungwon, "I shall deal with you at a later date", he tells the alpha, walking over to Jungwon, "But for now you are my priority. Are you alright?"

Jungwon's eyes blink and one stray tear slides down his pale cheek, the cream he put on his face sliding with it and leaving a trail. Jongseong followed the trail with his eyes before looking back at Jungwon's glistening, wide open ones. They were terribly unfocused.

"We should head home", was the only thing Jungwon said, eyes still glassy. 

It was obvious Jongseong was not alright with only that, because he looked back at the alpha who was now staring at them from next to the glass door, everyone in the hall looking over at what was happening on the small balcony.

"Jungwon. What happened? Did he hurt you? Touch you? Did he-"

"Jongseong", Jungwon cuts him off, looking into his eyes for the first time since he came to the balcony, "I said, we should head home."

And Jongseong, albeit with hesitation, offered his arm and Jungwon took it, the pair walking out of the balcony and into the hall before they got down the stairs and to a carriage waiting for them.

And Jungwon just stared down the whole way out, not noticing the look Cho Yeobin and his betrothed exchanged. Not noticing the clench of the general's fists. Not noticing the raised eyebrows from the older alphas and the laughs from their omegas. 

Jungwon supposes that there's something good in that. Because if he were to notice them then, he would not have lasted holding his crying in before his head hit his bed.