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Garreg Mach was eerily quiet. Byleth had wanted to believe the villager that found him was playing a cruel joke on him, but the state of the monastery was proof of how much time had passed. There hadn’t been any students here in years.
His clothes were still damp.He should be shivering with cold but he could barely feel it. His muscles should have been stiff after five years of not using them, but they weren’t. It wasn’t just adrenaline. He had been saved by Sothis yet again.
It was supposed to be the Millenium Festival, and the promise that had been made five years ago (mere weeks ago to him) drove him forward. Would the Golden Deer have forgotten such a silly promise made so long ago, a promise made to a teacher they must all have thought long dead?
His stomach twisted with guilt. He had failed his students. How would he ever find out if they were even still alive?
The Garreg Mach grounds were still dark in the pre-dawn light. The inside of the monastery had clearly been ransacked over and over. He made his way to the Goddess Tower, if only because it was the best place if he wanted to see everything below, and survey the true extent of the damage.
His steps echoed as he climbed the steps to the Goddess Tower. He dimly sensed he was not alone, and that was confirmed as he saw a silhouette near the top of the long staircase. He had to stop himself from running, because he thought he knew who it was but he wasn’t sure if it was just wishful thinking. Running headlong into danger had never exactly worked out for him.
Byleth paused in the shadows. It really was him.
Claude turned to look at him at the sound of Byleth’s footsteps. Byleth took a step closer so Claude could see him but didn’t dare go further. He wondered what kind of sight he made right now. He wondered if Claude would think someone was playing a trick on him.
But Claude broke out in the most genuine smile Byleth had ever seen on his face. Claude made quite a sight himself, with his gold finery lit in the bright light of the sun that had just crested over the horizon.
Claude held out his hand to Byleth. And despite the cold and the damp, Byleth felt warm.
*****
Byleth sat at the edge of the dock, attempting to fish.
“This would be a lot easier if you’d stop being so loud,” Byleth grumbled.
“But you’re enjoying my company anyway,” Claude said with a grin.
Byleth hummed noncommittally.
They sat in comfortable silence for a bit. Byleth had managed to catch a few fish and they sat in a bucket beside him.
“Something’s on your mind,” Claude said.
“What makes you think that?”
“You’ve got your thinking face on.” Claude shrugged.
Sometimes he wondered if Claude was making up being able to read his expressions, but he did trust in Claude’s intuition. And there was no way he could make that many lucky guesses. He just wasn’t used to someone being able to read him.
“I guess something has been bothering me a bit,” Byleth admitted.
“Oh?”
Byleth turned to Claude, putting his fishing rod down on the dock.
“Oh, Teach has dropped the rod.” Claude raised his eyebrows. “This must be serious.”
Byleth fixed him with a stern look. “People keep telling me that you were one of the only ones who believed I was still alive.”
Claude tilted his head, “And that’s a… problem?”
“It’s a problem because they’ve been telling me you were just waiting for me to come back!” Byleth said.
“They’re exaggerating a bit,” Claude said. “Yeah, you coming back was the ideal situation and the one I was hoping and planning for the most. But It’s not like I hadn’t thought of other alternatives.”
“But you didn’t put any of them in place for five years,” Byleth said.
“There were other things stopping me from moving forward.”
“What if I had never come back?” Byleth said. “And I really was dead?”
Claude gave him a strange look. “Are you mad at me for having faith in you?”
“I don’t like blind faith,” Byleth said. “And I didn’t think you did either.”
“Clearly it wasn’t blind faith,” Claude gestured at Byleth in front of him, as though he was the physical proof of his faith being rewarded. When Byleth didn’t look amused, Claude sighed. He gave Byleth a crooked smile and said, “If you hadn’t come back, then I would have had to tell Lorenz he was right on my deathbed.”
Byleth felt his mouth twitch, threatening a smile. Though he wasn’t going to let Claude off the hook that easily.
“And I knew you’d never do that to me, that’s why I was so confident.” Damn Claude and his cocky little smile.
“I’m being serious, Claude.”
“So am I.”
Byleth sighed.
“What’s actually got you upset?” Claude said, his voice gentle. So many things about Claude were subtly different. Byleth had never heard this gentle and patient tone from him before.
“I just… don’t like the idea that I failed you somehow. That if I had come back sooner things wouldn’t have gotten this bad. And if I hadn’t come back-”
“You did,” Claude said. “And you didn’t fail me. There’s no point worrying yourself over the past. Personally, I’m looking forward to the future. And what we can do together.”
Byleth looked away from him, he really hoped Claude couldn’t read the expression on his face this time.
Claude stretched his hand down to the water and splashed some into Byleth’s face.
Byleth sputtered. “What the hell was that for? The water’s freezing!”
Claude laughed, “Snapping you out of whatever you’re thinking about.”
Frowning, Byleth wiped his face. “You’re still scaring away the fish.”
“Fine, fine, I’ll be quiet.” Claude stretched his arms over his head and yawned dramatically. “Maybe I’ll take a little nap.”
“On the dock? That doesn’t sound very comfortable.”
“Never underestimate where I’m willing to take a nap. But-” Claude shot him a cheeky grin “I have a better idea.”
Before Byleth could say anything, Claude had turned around and propped his back up against Byleth’s.
“You’re using me as a tree trunk now?” Byleth grumbled.
“Yep.”
“Why don’t you just go back to your room if you’re that tired?”
“This is a leisure nap, not an exhaustion nap,” Claude said. “Besides, I’d rather spend the time here with you.”
Byleth felt heat creep up his face. That was… new. Was he blushing? He didn’t think he had ever done that before. He couldn’t see his reflection in the water well enough and he definitely wasn’t going to ask Claude to confirm it. He supposed he should just be glad Claude couldn’t see him with his back turned.
“Just don’t scare away the fish.” Byleth said, glad his voice came out in his usual deadpan tone.
“You won’t even know I’m here.”
Byleth doubted that. But Claude did go still rather quickly. Byleth had spent enough time with him to know he was a very light sleeper and the stillness and quiet wouldn’t last long.
Still, this was… nice. In a weird sort of way. It was nice that Claude felt this comfortable with him.
Byleth’s face still felt a little hot.
The quiet gave him time to think about what Claude had said. Byleth still wasn’t sure he agreed with him. He was going to be haunted by thoughts of what might have happened to Claude during his five-year disappearance, by thoughts of what could have happened if he had never come back. He had a suspicion he’d be thinking about it the rest of his life.
But he supposed Claude was right in a sense. He did come back to them, he was here now. And Claude was safe and he needed Byleth still, after all this time.
Claude felt warm against his back.
*****
When Claude had asked Byleth if he wanted to see something “amazing”, Byleth really wasn’t surprised when he ended up in a wing of Garreg Mach that had been closed off even five years ago. It had clearly been in a state of disrepair back then, and the battle, abandonment, and occasional raid of bandits had done nothing to help the situation.
He was, however, a bit surprised when Claude pulled back a tapestry on the wall to reveal a hidden staircase.
“We’re going up?” Byleth asked.
“Yes?” Claude gave him an odd look.
Byleth shrugged. “I sort of assume when I follow you somewhere I’m going to end up in a secret underground passage.”
Claude laughed, the sound echoed a bit in the hall. “Hey, that was only… three times.”
“Would have been much more if not for the time we were caught by Rhea,” Byleth said dryly.
“I was very impressed by your ability to come up with a good lie on the spot,” Claude said. “That’s when I knew you and the Golden Deer were just meant to be.”
Byleth knew Claude was joking, but he ended up looking away so Claude couldn’t see his reaction. For all he hated being called the Ashen Demon, there were very specific moments where he missed the days Claude couldn’t read him so well.
Though, he wasn’t sure those days had ever really existed. Claude had always been able to read him better than anyone else ever could.
“So where will this take us?” Byleth said, looking up the dark spiral staircase.
“Follow me and find out.” Claude winked, and Byleth rolled his eyes, but when Claude started up the stairs Byleth followed him without complaint.
Their footsteps echoed, creating a cacophony that surely would have alerted Rhea if she had still been around.
“I still always feel like we’re going to get in trouble when we go skulking around Garreg mach,” Byleth admitted.
“We’re not skulking, we’re exploring,” Claude said. “Besides, no one’s around who can get us in trouble now. You’re technically the one in charge of the church.”
“Don’t remind me,” Byleth said.
They climbed in silence the rest of the way. It was a very long staircase, and Byleth was beginning to wonder when it would end when they stopped. The end, as it turned out, was an old wooden trap door which Claude had to ram with his shoulder a few times to open.
When they crawled up out of the staircase Byleth looked around to see they were at the top of a completely normal (if slightly dilapidated) tower.
Byleth gave Claude an unimpressed look.
“Oh don’t give me that look, you know this isn’t what I came here to show you,” Claude said.
“So what are we here for?”
Grinning, Claude said, “For the show!”
When Byleth just stared at him, Claude gestured up at the night sky.
Byleth frowned. “Claude, I know you like stars but if you dragged me all the way out here at two in the morning just for-”
“Have some faith in me,” Claude said. “Every year around this time there’s a meteor shower. Tonight is the best night to see it. Perfectly clear, no moon. And this-” Claude spread his arms out wide “-is the best and most unobstructed view in Garreg Mach.”
Claude looked pleased with himself, but his smile slipped a bit at Byleth’s nonplussed expression.
“I… don’t know what a meteor shower is.”
Claude rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. “Right… have you ever seen a bunch of shooting stars at once?”
Byleth nodded.
“That’s it, basically. The peak of it will start around three in the morning.”
“It sounds nice,” Byleth said. He was always impressed by Claude’s knowledge of the stars. Byleth knew nothing about them, nothing that he hadn’t needed to learn for navigation. He had been picking up a lot about them from listening to Claude, but he still had no idea how Claude could calculate the exact time and date of shooting stars.
“I have something that will make it even better,” Claude said. He gestured at a box Byleth hadn’t noticed when he came up. Claude opened it.
“A spyglass?” Byleth asked, tilting his head quizzically.
“Close!” Claude pulled something that looked like a really big spyglass and a stand to put it on. “It’s called a telescope, you can use it to make the stars seem closer.”
Byleth frowned slightly. “How come I’ve never seen one before?”
“Ah,” Claude said, fiddling with some dials on the side of it. “Have you ever looked at the library in Abyss?”
“A bit,” Byleth said.
“Well, somewhere in the library there’s a book with a record of the church banning these ages ago.”
“Why?”
Claude shrugged. “Add that to the list of questions for if we ever find Rhea.”
“Well, I think you’ll find they’re unbanned pretty soon,” Byleth muttered. Claude clearly heard him though, because Byleth saw a soft smile on his face at the words.
Claude looked through the lens and said to himself “That should be good.” He gestured to the telescope as he took a step back. “Look for yourself!”
Byleth bent to look through the lens and nearly gasped. The stars certainly seemed a lot closer, and he swore he could see more of them.
He pulled away from the telescope after a long moment, and looked up to see Claude giving him a soft smile.
“It’s something else, huh?”
“Yeah… it is.”
“We’ll be able to see the shower without it, but I thought it’d be nice to be able to see it up close too.” Claude tilted his head up, he seemed contemplative. “I used to come up here secretly when I was a student.”
“I do sort of hate hearing about the things you got up to when I was supposed to be keeping an eye on you.”
“Hey, I didn’t get caught,” Claude said, with a wink. “I left that telescope up here, though way better hidden. I just recently thought to check to see if it was still here. I’m glad bandits never found it.”
Byleth couldn’t help the fond smile that crept across his face. It was so easy to picture Claude in his student days, so desperate to look at the stars that he’d sneak into a restricted section of the monastery and use something the church had banned…
“Oh!” Byleth said. He had just seen something streak across the sky from the corner of his eye.
“Did you see one?” Claude demanded. Byleth laughed as Claude seemed a little disappointed he didn’t see the first star.
For a while, it was something of a competition. With both of them trying to see the next one, turning in the direction the last shooting star had been seen only for one to appear on the other side of the sky.
Eventually they appeared so often that there was no point keeping track. Claude helped Byleth see some through the telescope. Claude would readjust the position to show him other things. The planets and their moons, the constellations up close, the different colours of the stars that were impossible to see without help.
Claude’s warm hand on his back as he helped direct Byleth’s view…
They stopped looking through the telescope and just took in the view of the sky. They were quiet, but it was a comfortable sort of silence. Byleth had no idea how long they had been there, but he didn’t really want to leave no matter how tired they would both be the next day.
“You know,” Claude said suddenly. “With Failnaught, there’s a combat art called ‘Fallen Star’. No idea where that name came from, but when I looked through the historical records it’s been called that for centuries.”
Byleth nodded.
“Honestly, I always thought it seemed kind of ominous. But watching a meteor shower like this… maybe it’s not so bad.”
Without thinking, Byleth said “That’s what Solon called me.”
“What?”
“He called me Fell Star, when he tried to trap me.”
“Huh,” Claude said. He was quiet for a moment before turning to Byleth “Guess that’s just more proof we were meant to be, eh?”
Byleth was glad for the dark, because he felt a blush creep across his face again. He elbowed Claude and said, “Stop kidding around.”
“Hmm,” Claude said. Byleth waited for him to continue, but he didn’t say anything else. Byleth didn’t know what to make of it. But as they lapsed back into quiet it wasn’t uncomfortable, and they stayed until the grey light of dawn broke over the horizon.
*****
A cheer rang out through the dining hall. Byleth had lost count of how many rounds of drinks had gone around. But he couldn’t blame them. They had won a long and difficult battle, and they needed a chance to blow off steam now that they were back at the monastery.
Byleth would have preferred to just celebrate with the Golden Deer and their closest allies, but everyone else had contributed to the battle too. And he was sure Claude would plan something smaller for all of them.
He wished at least he could talk to Claude, but since the feast had started he had been surrounded by people who wanted to talk to him. Byleth, too, had a lot of people who wanted to ask him about how the war was going, thank him for his efforts, ask him if Claude was betrothed-
“No.” Byleth said, a little more forcefully than he meant to. But it was the third time he had been asked that tonight and he was running out of patience. Why were people coming to him about Claude’s relationship status?
Byleth extricated himself from the group of people surrounding him, making some excuse about needing to speak to Claude. Unfortunately, when he tried to find a space that was less crowded he had ended up at the front of the room.
“Speech!” came a voice from the back of the room. Byleth froze as the room picked up the chant of “speech speech speech”. He never knew what to say when he was put on the spot.
But Claude emerged out of the crowd. He jovially threw an arm around Byleth’s shoulder.
“Let’s not have any stuffy speeches!” Claude shouted, to some laughter from the crowd. “Let’s just have a toast- to the man of the hour!” Claude gestured at Byleth. Cheers rang out “-My other half on the battlefield, without him none of this would be possible!”
Another cheer, as everyone raised their various glasses (and tankards) to Byleth. For once, Byleth was glad for his reputation for being stone-faced, because he really had no idea what expression to make in a situation like this.
“Sorry about that,” Claude said under his breath as the party’s attention drifted away again. His arm was still around Byleth’s shoulder, and he led Byleth away from the front of the room to lean against a wall on the side.
Byleth shook his head, “Thanks for saving me from making a speech.”
Claude smiled. “It’s nice to see everyone having fun like this, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, it’s been a while since we’ve seen the dining hall so lively. Kind of reminds me of when you threw that feast after the Battle of the Eagle and Lion.” He shot Claude a look “The one that was definitely alcohol-free when Seteth questioned me about it later.”
“Thanks for running interference,” Claude said.
Byleth shook his head, but he couldn’t hide the fond smile on his face.
There was a minor commotion back at the front of the room. Byleth and Claude looked up to see some people had brought instruments in. And after setting up their chairs and tuning, they began to play.
“This party isn’t ending anytime soon, is it?” Byleth said.
“I hope not,” Claude grinned as the heavy wooden tables were pushed to the walls to clear something of a dance floor.
As people began to fill up the dance floor. Claude said “Now this is nostalgic.” He turned to Byleth and bowed, holding out his hand, “May I have this dance, Teach?”
Byleth rolled his eyes, but took his hand, letting Claude pull him out onto the dance floor like he had so many years ago.
So much about Claude was the same, so much was different. He was so much more open with Byleth, with everyone really. But sometimes Byleth still couldn’t tell how much of what Claude said was sincere and how much was just him kidding around.
“You’re certainly a better dancer than you used to be,” Byleth said, as Claude led him. The last time they had danced, they had been almost equally bad, stiff and awkward even though they were having fun.
Claude’s smile was blinding as he said “Well, I had to practice to impress you when I got the chance to dance with you again.”
Like that.
“Of course,” Byleth said, with a hint of sarcasm.
In response, Claude spun Byleth around him, Byleth’s coat fanning out, before he was in front of Claude again.
“Do you doubt me?” Claude said triumphantly.
“No,” Byleth said. “I guess as your other half I have to practice to get on your level.”
He barely gave himself an instant to register the surprise on Claude’s face before he dipped Claude, so low that Claude’s hair nearly touched the floor. Claude laughed in delight as a few people whooped in the background. Byleth held him there for a moment before pulling Claude back up and setting him on his feet.
The song stopped, and Byleth’s moment of confidence, or playfulness, or whatever had come over him stopped with it. Before Claude could say anything, Byleth left the dining hall and out into the night.
The cool night air felt even colder after the warmth of the crowded hall. He ended up wandering back to the dock. Staring down at the dark water and the moon and stars reflected in it.
He was embarrassed. He didn’t know what came over him. Now that he had acted on it, he thought back on the moments he had suspected Claude might be flirting with him or… whatever he was doing, and he couldn’t help but doubt every one. He wrapped his arms around himself.
He heard footsteps on the wooden dock.
“Byleth?” Claude asked.
Byleth didn’t say anything. He could hear Claude hesitate and then continue walking until he was standing beside him.
“What’s up?” Claude asked softly.
Byleth just shrugged in response.
Claude sighed, but he didn’t sound frustrated with Byleth. “I hope I didn’t upset you with what I said?”
“You didn’t, really,” Byleth said. “It’s just… sometimes I can’t tell what you mean by the things you say.”
“I always mean what I say,” Claude said. “Especially when it comes to you.”
Byleth finally turned to face Claude. Claude was giving him such a soft look. No one had ever looked at him like that.
“Aw, Byleth, are you blushing?”
“No,” Byleth said immediately.
“You are!” Claude looked far too pleased with himself.
“How can you even tell in the dark like this?”
“I just can,” Claude said. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you do that.”
“That’s just because I got good at hiding it around you.” Byleth immediately regretted saying that, what was with his mouth working before his brain tonight?
Claude blinked. “Is that so?” he said thoughtfully.
The water lapped against the dock as a slight breeze picked up. Byleth could hear the talking and laughter and music coming from the dining hall, muffled by the heavy wooden doors.
“I do mean what I say,” Claude said. “I just… didn’t want to do anything about it while we were still fighting the war.”
Byleth nodded, though he almost didn’t dare let himself believe Claude was saying what he thought he was saying.
“And,” Claude grimaced. “I like to think I can read you well, but sometimes I worried that I was just seeing what I wanted to see, when it came to this.”
At that, Byleth wanted to say something profound, he really did. But coming up with the right words was never his strong suit, at least when it came to his own emotions. So he grabbed Claude by the lapels of his jacket and kissed him.
“Mmmph?!” Claude made a noise of surprise but he could feel Claude’s smile against his own lips. He felt a moment of triumph for being able to catch Claude by surprise, before Claude was kissing him back and all ability to think left him.
When they broke apart, they were both a little breathless. Claude’s hair was messed up and his face was pink.
“Well,” Claude said, after a beat. “I was going to say we should talk about it, but that works too.”
“You know I’m more about actions than words,” Byleth said with a slight smile.
Claude seemed more shy and flustered than Byleth had ever seen him. But he was also smiling wider than Byleth had ever seen, a smile that truly met his eyes.
“We should go back to the party,” Byleth said reluctantly. “People will be wondering where we are. Don’t want to start any rumours.”
Claude raised his eyebrows. “They aren’t rumours if they’re true.”
Byleth laughed, “You know what I mean.”
“We probably should go back,” Claude said. “We can talk about this later… or not talk, as the case may be.”
Byleth swatted at him playfully, and Claude dodged, laughing.
They headed back to the feast, leaving the cold night for the warmth of the dining hall and the laughter and celebration of their friends.
And if people noticed that Byleth and Claude stood closer together than normal, they didn’t say anything.
And this time it was Byleth who held out his hand to Claude, to invite him to dance.