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Here we are again, in a dark and lifeless environment, in an elegant setting filled with the story of a broken family, where the broken pieces would never be put back together.
The memory that haunted him no matter what he tried, he would never escape the trap called nightmare.
The ambiguous, yet detailed memory of that event, the katanas clashing, a duel of brothers; deep in the back of his mind he wanted to continue believing that that decision was the right one, that it was the best choice.
He only had to follow the events to the letter, a fight that seemed endless and the final blow, to plunge the katana into the chest of the one he called brother.
And so it was, everything happened as usual, but this time he felt different, he never saw the inert body, for him it would always be a mistake, as it would be an unpublished reminder of his worst sin.
But this time he was curious to see, something inside him told him to see, exactly that curiosity made him make the decision.
And he regretted it instantly, the owner of the body was not his brother, the one who swore him protection and loyalty; no, that body was bigger, covered by a worn red cloth, but even darker because of the large blood stain that covered it.
Yes, that body belonged to the one who gave her a chance, the one who gave her complete trust, the one who told her every secret, the one who offered her love.
Cole Cassidy lay limp on the ground, pitifully dead; Hanzo just dropped to his knees in the emotional shock he was feeling at the moment. This couldn't be happening, was the only thing that kept repeating in his mind. Tears began to well up in his eyes.
His life couldn't get any worse, but here he was fulfilling his greatest fear: hurting those he loves the most.
So, grabbing the second katana, he brought it to his jugular to make the cut. After all, he had nothing left to lose.
"Forgive me, Cole. Forgive me."
And then he woke up startled, screaming and causing his bedmate to also startle at his partner's action.
"What's the matter, are we under attack?" still dozing, he began to search for the non-existent intruder only to then realise the state of his lover. "Oh, honey, what's wrong?" he went straight to hug him. Providing him with protection was paramount at that moment.
"It's over, shhh" she began to caress Hanzo's body. "It was just a nightmare, I'm here." Simple words, simple promises. "You're not alone."
The only sounds were those confessions of love Cassidy could say without difficulty and Hanzo's sloppy sobs.
"I'll kill you," he confessed.
"What?" Cole was a little confused.
"I'll kill you because I'm a monster." Hanzo wanted to scream all his fears at him and thus make the cowboy reason so that he would eventually leave him. It is the right decision.
But before she could continue, she received a kiss. "Let's see, Han," with the archer's attention fully, Cass would give him a statement. "I'm going to repeat it until you always remember."
"I love you, no matter your past, your sins, your fears. Those things are part of you too, and I will love everything that comes from you." Now Cassidy was shedding tears. "Difficulties exist, that's for sure, but we'll get through them together, you and I." The hug was stronger, but not rough, it was soft, cool, like the scent of the desert sky.
"So if you want to get rid of me, just know that it will be impossible. The cowboy just kept hugging him until Hanzo finally calmed down.
Cole thought the quietness lulled him to sleep, so he settled him down to rest at last. I'd tell Winston to give them the day off, they need it.
Cass was about to fall asleep, but before that happened he managed to hear something that will make him happy every time he remembers it, "Cole.... I love you too.