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“Have you noticed our ever-lovely receptionist lately?” Ray asked everyone around the dinner table, slight sarcasm coming from his question.
“Hard to say. I havent seen her climb out of her damn room in weeks.” Winston chuckled, everyone hummed in agreement. “Yeah, but Im getting worried, shes never been like this.” Ray sighed. He stuck his fork in his chinese food and started playing with it, not really being able to eat from his worry.
“Maybe shes homesick or something. Maybe its boy problems. Women are so damn complicated its hard to say,” Peter rolled his eyes playing around with his chinese food too, as much as he wanted to hide it, he was worried about her too.
“One of us should go check on her.”
“Yeah.” Peter agreed. Every slowly turned their heads to Egon. He sighed, “Cant. I have lab reports to write after I get done eating.” He said as he tried stuffing more food in his mouth. Peter slowly turned to Ray, “Nose goes.” He said putting his finger against the bottom of his nose. Ray rolled his eyes, “Fine, I’ll go.” He sighed and started making his way up the stairs.
Once he reached her door, he slowly knocked, only to be met with soft sounds of guitar music off the radio and some feet patting against the floor. The doorknob opened gently to reveal her. She had looked paler than ever and had lost some weight and looked like she hadn’t slept in months.
“Yes?” She rasped, Ray looked at her in concern,
“Can I talk to you about something?” He asked gently, making his way through the door, then closing it. She looked at him with dead eyes as she sat on her bed.
Ray sighed and sat next to her, “Whats wrong?” He said putting a hand on her shoulder. “Nothing” she mumbled while staring at her feet, “You look like the grim reaper. Please, whats wrong.”
“Im in love with Egon…” she rasped out again, although it sounded like a fresh wound had been torn, and the tears started coming.
“I-I dont know what to do. I cant handle my emotions. Him and Janine had a thing together, and shes just… so skinny and so pretty and so clever. I havent ate properly since I realized I love him… I just cant handle it this time Ray, I cant! I like him too much. Ive never had somebody like me ever. Ive never had a boyfriend. Ive never been in love before until him. Hes always so sweet to me, but he avoids me most of the time and I dont know if its because hes nervous or if he doesnt like me. I just dont know what to do and I feel like Im overreacting. Im so overwhelmed with my feelings I-“
“Honey, Stop beating yourself up. Youre perfectly fine just the way you are and Janine and Egon never had a thing.” Ray said rubbing both of her arms up and down as he tried to look her in the eyes. She fell into Rays chest and started sobbing.
“I dont know what to do. Why cant I be like Peter and just flirt with everyone and not give a fuck?!” She exclaimed, starting to get angry at her pathetic state. “Shh, hey. Calm down. Youre just overwhelmed. How about you come downstairs and eat with everyone? I think it’ll make you feel good to finally get out of your room.” Ray suggested. She looked off into the distance, thinking, then slowly nodded.
Egon had already gone into the lab again, thankfully, so it was only Peter and Winston left.
“Theres the princess of darkness! You look like death itself!” Peter exclaimed. She sat down, “Thanks Peter.” She mumbled, Winston sighed, “Hes not wrong kid. You okay?” “Ill be fine. Just some personal problems.” She waved them off, both of them shrugging.
Pulling out a chair to start eating the chinese food in front of her, she was soon interrupted by Egon coming down the stairs, looking down at whatever new technology he was working on for ghost hunting. She tried not to focus on him, but it was hard when he almost stopped dead in his tracks to look at her.
“Are you alright? You look extremely pale and thinner. Are you getting enough sunlight and nutrients? Youre exhibiting main symptoms of vitamin deficiency and depression.” He inquired, inching closely to look at her. Her cheeks turned instantly pink, adding color and a flush to her face. His full attention made her feel smaller than she had in her own room.
“I-“ “come with me.” Egon cut her off. He seemed worried since he had never seen symptoms so noticeable before. Maybe it was because he had studied her behaviors that the change was apparent, but he would never tell anyone that.
She looked so sickly and filled with death that it slightly scared him. “Sit,” he motioned to the sofa. She sat down lightly, avoiding eye contact with the taller man. Strange, he thought to himself, she’s acting rather timid lately. Maybe its a symptom of isolation. But I sometimes lock myself up in the lab for weeks and dont show these symptoms. He pondered. He grabbed a spinny chair and slowly glided his way over to where she sat. He grabbed his stethoscope and started checking her heart rate. It was increasing with every second and everytime he pressed down again. Hmm he mused, then he grabbed a flashlight while lightly grabbing her chin and facing her towards him to check her pupil dilation and other factors. Pupils are dilated over 100% more than normal amount. Her skin is becoming hot and gaining more color from bloodflow. His brows started to furrow.
“What are you doing Egon?” She grumbled quietly, she felt like a guinea pig.
“Has anything traumatizing or scary recently happened in your life? Your symptoms are different than a few of the other problems I was thinking of.” He questioned, she shrugged.
“Uhm, no,” she fibbed, but not really. Falling in love wasnt traumatizing, but it was scary. And she definitely did not want Egon to know this was the reason for her problems, especially since he was the cause. “I can tell when you lie,” he sighed, “I just want to help.” He assured. He had to admit, this was the best he had been with someones feelings in a while, but it was probably because of how much he had realized he cared.
She gulped mildly before looking towards her feet, “I’m in love with someone and it’s going to hurt me since relationships never work out for me.” She wasnt worried about breaking in front of Egon since she had already cried in front of Ray, but it was still embarrassing and taking a toll on her.
He yet had looked even more confused, and started writing frantically. “Interesting. You know, you have the exact opposite react of almost 80% of studies in psychology when it comes to love…” he noted to her while writing down other symptoms while he waited for her to evaluate further.
He looked back up at her to continue before realizing she was staring at him. “Whenever Im around him, he makes my stomach feel warm, like butterflies or hot milk churning into butter. My face gets warm, everything gets warm. I get nervous because I dont know how to communicate, so I hardly make eye contact. I dont know how to handle my emotions so things end up working out badly and I find myself never feeling happy from the feeling…” she mumbled.
Egon was listening closely. He hadn’t had a hands-on psychology experiment in a few years and he was a little slow with his notes and analysis.
But then he started re reading the things she had listed off, which were also all the same behaviors she showed towards him.
He slowly moved his eyes between her face and the clipboard. He was getting worried that he was the fault of her being. “I dont think he likes me which has made me stop eating because of anxiety, I think… I just…” she started getting flustered again and looked away from him, causing him to hurriedly set down his clipboard.
“Stay right here,” he said as he rushed downstairs. She sat on the sofa and patiently waited, wondering what she had done to herself. She heard his footsteps rushing up the stairs just as much as they rushed down. “Please eat, you need it.” he said holding out the food to her that he had brought from downstairs.
She stared at it before slowly picking it up and setting it in her lap. He continued to stare at her as she was hesitant to start eating, which was caused by his starring in the first place… she looked up at him and the silence was almost pounding.
“Youre in love with me.” Egon finally declared, and a humiliated look washed over her face. “I really should go back to-“ “No, please listen…” he pleaded as he sat by her with a concerned face.
“You don’t know how to handle your emotions and that is perfectly fine… you get so easily overwhelmed and you need to stop being so harsh on yourself… I dont know your background on love but theres a reason that 80% of the human population gets so much joy from it.” He took a deep breathe as she stared down and continued to listen.
“Youre practically abusing yourself and I hate seeing you in these conditions… it hurts me… you are so…” he paused for a moment, either hesitating or trying to find the right words, “beautiful to me…and it makes me sad that you did all of this to yourself because of something I couldn’t control.” He sighed, “I’m not very good with affection and with my feelings also, but I do know enough and have enough PhD’s to know that I feel different when I’m around you, almost the same as you around me. You make me feel so warm inside, my heart rate increases tremendously along with my blood pressure… I think what my body is trying to tell my brain is that I’m in love with you also.” He finished and she had started crying.
Egon felt panicked and quickly stood up, “Egon, come sit,” she whimpered again, so he reclaimed his spot. “You just made me so happy that I cant stop crying.” She laughed and wiped her eyes with her palms, making Egon relieved.