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“Dazai-san!”
Amidst his heavy injuries and barely moveable body, Atsushi forces all the fiber in his body to move according to his will—to his wish. As he does, he reaches out an arm, successfully holding onto a fabric of Dazai’s coat, fingers desperately clinging onto him, all too grateful for Akutagawa for not interrupting him.
Dazai’s eyes shoot open, feet still planted on the edge of the roof, head turning to face Atsushi’s horrified expression painted with so much despair, clutching tightly as he can to an almost zero amount of hope.
Atsushi pulls him as hard as he can with his weakened state and crashing mental capacity.
And Dazai can’t say or do anything in response. He let the wind take its course and push his body further away, thoughts circling nothing but his regrets and anguished dreams. Now, all he can think about is how things go differently and why it is not as he is expecting.
Something may have changed.
Another of Atsushi’s hands takes hold of Dazai’s coat. With no ounce of refusal from Dazai, Atsushi manages to pull him closer until he’s a step away from the edge and now pulled into Atsushi’s feeble embrace.
He presses Dazai more to himself, taking in his unusual scent and heaviness against his fragile and wounded self.
“..Atsushi-kun-”
“Dazai-san…” Atsushi sobs, his voice and body shaking, fingers digging onto Dazai’s back weakly. “I…”
The very moment Dazai turns his back and stops his speech, a flash of light in barely a millisecond plays in Atsushi’s head. It does nothing but confuse him all the more. But after that, Atsushi sees another version of Dazai in front of him. One wearing a different coat—lighter than any outfit he’s seen Dazai wear—and a bearing a different feeling. He knows he needs to do prevent him from committing suicide.
Like always.
But like Dazai said, with three people alive knowing the truth, the world will crumble and disappear. And Atsushi may not understand why, but he knows Dazai wants to prevent this world from dying, leading Atsushi to decide on a different ending for the story Dazai wrote.
“I’m… not letting you… die,” Atsushi mumbles with soft emphasis on each word, as if his breath is taken away with every word he says. “Not here…”
He pulls his head back to meet Dazai’s dumbstruck expression and clenches his facial muscles at his next words.
“Not ever.” Then, Atsushi forces a smile as he reaches out to cup Dazai’s cheeks. “Like always.”
“Atsushi-kun, you-”
With Dazai’s allowance and Atsushi’s persistence, Atsushi closes the gap between their faces and chuckles ever so softly, every little move from his throat draining and killing him inside.
“I got you, didn’t I, Dazai-san?”
As Atsushi closes his eyes, he leans his lips toward Dazai’s, who allows it, and closes his eyes in response, confusion, and realization forming a new ballad in his head.
It’s but a small and brief kiss, the beginning of an oath from somewhere far away—somewhere else—so as Atsushi scoots away, he makes an effort to smile his brightest at the sight of Dazai’s eyes gleaming in suppressed tears.
“Please live, Dazai-san. And then promise me we’ll meet again. Elsewhere.”
As he says those words, he pushes Dazai toward Akutagawa, then steps back until he reaches the edge where Dazai is earlier. He switches their place during the embrace, and Dazai notices, but no words escape his throat.
“No… Atsushi-kun, no,” Dazai yells as he reaches out, but Akutagawa stops him on impulse. “What are you doing? You idiot!”
“Dazai-san, we’ll see each other again, don’t we?”
The strangest sight comes upfront as one stray tear slips past Dazai’s cheek.
“Promise me. Swear it.”
“Atsushi-kun… You-”
“Swear it to me,” Atsushi whispers in a way that reminds Dazai of a different version of Atsushi. “Swear it to the moon.”
Atsushi smiles and closes his eyes. He steps further back until nothing bridges under his foot, and the air swiftly takes control of his body.
“Atsushi-kun!”
With a content look painting Atsushi’s bloodied face, he finds solace in hearing Dazai yell his name as the last thing he will ever hear.
Now, surely, Dazai will have a chance to take back his regrets and live on alongside his dreams. Whatever they are, whoever they include, or however it all goes.