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They are in love with each other. But neither of them knew.
For years, Natasha Romanoff has been staring deep into a pair of beautiful blue eyes whenever and wherever she gets a chance, whether it be during mission debriefs or during their gym sessions or just brushing past in hallways or when she's in a middle of a crossfire, she doesn't care.
Natasha knows that what she feels for commander Hill is not something that have professional explanation. And she knows that it is not friendship either, no. She doesn't have that weird feeling in her stomach for Clint. Only the commander, the Maria Hill, can give her that feeling. A feeling that is so akin to love.
But that would be so stupid wouldn't it? Love is for children. Beside, Maria Hill would never bat an eye on someone like her that way anyway.
Or so she thought.
-
For years, Maria Hill has been ignoring her own mind and heart. Always trying to be professional, always trying to keep her distance. But those green eyes are so intoxicating and so easy to fell deep into. Trust her, she had.
The commander tries and convinces herself that it was just lust, Romanoff is a very gorgeous woman afterall. But she knows deep down that she doesn't dream about the laughter of every person she finds attractive, no. This was different. She was different.
Maria tries and convinces herself that their regular sparring sessions are just them doing their job, and that their teasing banters during them are nothing but quick jabs to distract one another. Maria tries and convinces herself that the protectiveness she feels for the redhead is nothing but her looking out for a fellow agent.
She would be lying to herself if she said she didn't enjoy spending time with Natasha. But it has to end at that. Just an amicable acquaintanceship. Nothing more.
Yes, Maria Hill is lying to herself.
Natasha is sitting beside the hospital bed, looking at the face of unmoving commander.
Maria looks like she is just sleeping, with her relaxed face and steady breathing. That's probably what Natasha would've thought if only she didn't know that the commander got 3 bullet wounds in her chest and is comatose.
She read the mission report, that's still opened on her tablet, for the fourth time. It was supposed to be a simple intel gathering mission. That's probably why Maria decided to sent out only two freshly level 3 agents without a handler. But the mission went FUBAR quick when their cover got blown and the agents were taken by the Russian gang they were trying to gather intels on.
The commander lead the rescue team herself. Things got messy down in the field quickly, but everyone made in out alive and mostly unharmed, well except for the commander herself. She stayed behind in the line of enemy fire to buy the team more time and that's how three bullets took place in her chest. Always the heroine, Natasha thought dryly.
The medics got to her fast and she underwent an emergency surgery but she lost a lot of blood and her brain was deprived of oxygen for longer than 2 minutes. The mission was 4 days ago, she hasn't wake up since then.
Natasha had been sitting beside the bed for hours, she sneaked in as soon as the nurses left the room for the day. Her eyes are still lingering on the commander's face, trying to memorize it just in case, she always think of the worst, and wondering if she will ever get to get lost in the commander's icy blue eyes ever again.
She wish she could see them right now, her beautiful blue eyes.
"The medbay visiting hour is over, Agent Romanoff." The sudden voice made her jumped and she turned around so fast, the chair she was sitting on almost got knock over.
Fury was standing in the doorway, looking at her carefully.
How long has he been here? Had he been studying her from there the whole time and she didn't notice? How did he even manage to creep up on her without her noticing? Is she getting that sloppy? Her mind filled with so many thoughts at once, she forgot to reply.
"Are you alright, agent?" He asked with a hint of concern in his voice, after a few moments of Natasha just standing there unmoving.
"Absolutely." Natasha faked a smirk quickly, it was like a second nature to her. "If the visiting hour is over then, what are you doing here, Director?" She quipped, trying to pretend like he didn't just caught her off guard and set off all her alarms.
"You answered your own question, Romanoff. I am the Director." He replied evenly, "I'm sorry if I scared you. Was not my intention." He continued, his voice is softer but his one eye is still studying her.
Fuck, he can sees right through her facades.
"Not at all, sir. Also I'm just leaving anyway." She lied effortlessly with a fake smile, starting to walk away from the bed as soon as the words left her mouth.
"You should tell her." His voice made her stopped dead in her tracks.
"What?" She asked with a confused frown.
"About you feelings. For her. You should tell her when she wakes up." He answered evenly, his eye not looking at her but instead focused on Maria.
All of Natasha Romanoff's alarms went off again for the second time in span of 5 minutes. Yes, she's getting really sloppy.
Despite her shock, Natasha was not really surprised that Fury, of all people, knows about it. She knows she had been very subtle but nothing - or no one - can get past Nick Fury's watchful eye, not even Black Widow herself.
But still, she was not prepared for it. Not prepared to be caught off guard and absolutely not prepared to talk about her feelings. So, she resorted back to the easiest way she knows to get out of these situations - humor.
"You mean, if she wakes up, Director" She corrected him with her usual fake smirk, but it completely faltered when she saw his expression.
Natasha had never seen him this angry.
Fury was a feared man and he does have the reputation for his bursts of anger once in a while, but this was different. His glare is full of pure rage and Natasha immediately knew she crossed a line.
"Sorry, I-" She tried to apologize but he cut her off with a raised hand.
"Dark humor is not something I appreciate right now, Romanoff. Especially, not concerning the life of Maria." He said with a sigh but his voice is still firm.
"Yes, sir. I'm sorry." Natasha apologized sheepishly, only then remembering how close Fury and Maria are and he probably sees her as somewhat of a daughter. She silently curses herself.
They stand still there silently for a few awkward seconds before Natasha decided she should leave and started walking away.
"I still stand by what I said though." His sudden voice faltered her steps, once again.
"You need to tell her. I know feeling and emotions are not really your thing, but just staring at her when she's unconsious is not the best way to go about it."
"I... I don't know why you are telling me this, sir" Natasha said truthfully with a small grimace.
"Because It is exhausting, watching you two pining for each other for years but neither of you making a first move cause you are both goddamn idiots." He sounds experasted as he answered her.
But Natasha was dumbfounded. She stares at him with wide eyes as her mind registered what he just said. She looked back at Maria, on the bed, in confusion and then at him again.
"What are you talking about? What do you mean- What? I- She is not-" Natasha stumbled on her own words, The Black Widow never stumble but she can't be bother to think about it right now.
What the hell does he mean both of them pining for each other? It is not possible, right..?
Fury did not say anything but just looks at her with a raised eyebrow, still studying her face carefully.
Natasha took a silent deep breath to calm her thoughts, before she asked cautiously, "Are you, by any chance, implying that Commander Hill is interested in me, sir?" She tried, and failed, to keep her voice even.
Fury's raised eyebrow went up even further, like he cannot believe what he just heard. "For the world's most dangerous and arguably best spy, you really are oblivious, Romanoff." Fury shook his head with a sigh.
Natasha was silence, her brows furrowing with confusion. This can't be real? He really is implying that?
"I am not gonna get involve in the love life of my two agents. But. She likes you. And even with only one good eye, I'm not blind enough to not notice it is all i will say. Dismissed now, Agent. You still have a job to go to tomorrow- well, later today. Go get some sleep." Fury said as he basically shooed her away.
Natasha nodded unsurely, seeing no point in disobeying him or denying anything, but her brows are still furrowed as she walked out of the room. Her brain is trying to form a complete thought but there's no luck. Did she heard him right? Did he really just says that? The commander likes her? Maria likes her?
She needs to do a lot of reflecting.
Fury just sighed to himself after Romanoff left the room. Idiot. He thought fondly.
He has been keeping an eye on both of them for years. Though, It was never really his intention to pry about their personal lives, It is hard to miss the way his two best agents look at one another.
The way the commander's eyes go searching for the redhead after every tough missions, the way the redhead seems to get lost in thoughts whenever Maria was near her and the way they hold each other's gaze a few milliseconds longer than necessary on mission debriefs. Yes, It was very hard to miss. But they somehow missed it themselves.
Agian, Idiots.
Three weeks, it had exactly been 3 weeks since that one hell of a mission that got her commander comatose.
Natasha had been coming to the medbay every nights, always after the visiting hours, much to the director's disapproval, but for the last 5 days, she had been away for a mission. Boring undercover mission that got prolonged because of Barton's stupidness.
She just got back from there 30 minutes ago, and now she is walking straight toward medbay, to Maria's room. She left without even giving the debrief of the mission but Clint can take care of that. The only thing she wants right now is to see her. To see Maria.
The sight waiting for her when she sets foot in the room almost made her forgets how to breathe.
"You are awake."
Maria looks up at her voice. Surprise flashed across her face, clearly not expecting to see her, but she hid it quick.
"Keen observation, Romanoff." She deadpanned.
"How long have you been awake?" Natasha couldn't careless about Maria's tone or her quips right now. Her mind is only filled with one thought, she is awake, she is okay, she is alive. Maria is okay.
Maria raised an eyebrow at her before answering. "A few hours." "What are you doing here, Romanoff? The visiting hour is over." She questioned, and Natasha notices that her voice sounds tired.
"I... Just checking in." Her voice is quiet and unsure, so unlike her usual Black Widow demeanor.
"Alright... Do you wanna sit down then?" Maria orferred, her brows slightly furrowing in concern.
God damnit, this woman. Always worrying about other people, even when she's the one currently hospitalized from fatal bullet wounds.
Natasha nodded and sat down on the plastic chair that she had seen more than her own bed in last 3 weeks.
She looks up to find Maria still looking at her, her tired blue eyes filled with concern and curiousty. God her eyes are so beautiful.
"You should tell her." Much to her dismay, the director's voice rings through her mind, and Natasha grimaced. She knows she has to but she don't know where the hell to even start.
"Nat, are you okay?" Maria's voice knocked her out of her own mind. She opened her mouth to reply but closed it again. She really don't know where to start.
So, she stops thinking what to say and just said out loud what's always on her mind.
"Your eyes are beautiful."
"...What?" Maria stares at her in confusion.
"Your eyes are beautiful." Natasha repeated.
"When you were unconsicious, I was scared I won't ever get to see them again." She told her quietly as she broke the eye contact. She don't think she can stares into those blue eyes while pouring her heart out.
"I came here every nights, waiting for you to wake up. I'm the Black Widow. I really should not be scared of anything" A soft bitter laugh left her lips.
"But I was terrified of losing you. I was... I was terrified that you won't ever wake up. It's not just worrying about a friend or a colleague. I worry about Clint and Phil too but never to this extent. I have never felt more scared in my life than I did when i saw you all bloodied after that mission, than when i thought i wouldn't get to see your eyes or your smile ever again. I-" Natasha stopped her rambling and took a small breath.
"I think I might like you but I've never felt this way about anyone. I don't really know what that feeling even is... Do you?" Natasha asked unsurely, still not daring to meet Maria's eyes.
A beat passed.
Then a soft hands cupped her face, making her look up into a pair of blue eyes. Maria answered her question with a soft kiss to her lips and Natasha's heart stopped. Not in an 'i am dying' kinda way but in a 'Fuck, Is this what being in love feels like' kinda way.
They pulled away after a few seconds, their eyes meeting again, blue and green staring into each other.
"I'm not sure myself but we can figure it out, together." Maria says softly as she smiled at her. The most beautiful goddamn smile she had ever seen.
And Natasha thinks, she would gladly let her heart stop a million more times if it means getting to see her commander's beautiful smile everytime.
The next time Fury sees the certain commander and a redhead assassin together, they are sitting in a cafetiria, both smiling and laughing and making love eyes at each other, not so subtly, might he adds.
Fucking finally. Fury thought as he just smirked to himself. Who knew, all these two idiots needed this whole time was just a push and one of them nearly dying.