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"Goddamn it Shadow, where are you?" Sonic paced around his living room, finger tapping on his hip as he waited. He hated waiting. He'd periodically look at the clock, it only ever being a minute or so later than the last time he looked, him getting more and more impatient as the hours went by. This wasn't the first time Shadow was late coming home, but Sonic was going to make sure it was the last. Finally however, the door clicked open. Sonic watched as a not-so-quiet 'fuck sake' left the clearly pissed off Shadow's mouth. Shadow walked through the hall, kicking off his shoes as he went before reaching the living room and throwing his duffle bag onto the arm chair. He swept back his quills as he turned to see Sonic's angry face, his teeth gritted slightly, and his foot tapping so fast blue sparks were starting to form. "Shadow, do you have any idea what time it is!?" Sonic asked rhetorically, expecting his usual response. A shrug of his shoulders as he slumped off to their shared bedroom. This time however was different. This time, he scooted over to the couch as he once again ruffled his quills, glancing over to the clock on the wall before slouching on the side furthest away from where Sonic was standing. "2:03am". His response caught Sonic off guard, mainly because he responded at all. "..Are you alright Shad?" Sonic's irritation faded as he stared at him, foot slowing down to a halt. Sonic looked at the way his eyes closed and his shoulders lowered as he relaxed into the soft pillows of the couch. At the way his arms folded under one another across his chest, the inhibitor rings he always wore getting in the way of his position. At the way his ears tilted towards Sonic as he spoke, letting Sonic know he was listening, despite not opening his eyes. "Mhm'' was his response, giving Sonic nothing else as he tried to figure out what was on his mind. "I know I said I'd be back by midnight, sorry." Shadow apologised, knowing full well how long Sonic must’ve been waiting for him. Sonic's expression softened as he listened to what Shadow had said, and how he said it. His voice sounded raspy and the words seemed like a struggle to get out. Walking towards the couch, Sonic sat next to his dazed boyfriend, gently pulling at his arms to open up. They fell to his side as he silently gave in to Sonic's request. Sonic's head rested on Shadow's chest, wiggling to avoid stabbing Shadow in the face with his spikes, as he reached over his stomach to hold one of his hands, lacing their fingers together. "What's wrong, Shadow.." His voice had nothing but concern and sincerity in it. All that mattered was him, and Sonic wasn't going to stop until he was given answers.
Usually Sonic would've teased Shadow by now. Making fun of how unkempt his quills are and wondering why he doesn't take good care of them. Whining about how he doesn't get enough attention while Shadow's away. Or wondering how many times Shadow got his ass handed to him in the last couple of days. Not this time though. Contrary to popular belief, Sonic wasn't stupid. And as much as he wanted to be, Shadow wasn't the best at hiding his emotions either.
It took around 10 minutes of whining and begging before Shadow gave in, pushing Sonic off of him and leaning forward, staring at the floor. "Today is..the anniversary of Maria's death…" He said in a sullen tone, tears already pricking at the corners of his eyes, and his ears flopping lower. The atmosphere of the room felt much darker and Sonic's expression changed to one of great sympathy, recalling all the information Shadow had told him over the course of their time together. Maria was only 12 when she was killed after G.U.N soldiers raided her and Shadow's home. She died protecting him, and he couldn't do anything about it.
"I see 'er in my dreams, y’know." Shadow said as he put his head in his hands, pulling Sonic from his thoughts. "She's stood right in front of me, covered in blood, begging and begging..for me to...save her.." His hands started to tremble as he went on, voice becoming unstable as tears rolled down his cheeks and onto his lap. "Those sound more like nightmares to me, Shad." Sonic put his hand on Shadow's leg, trying his best to comfort him. The attempt fell on deaf ears though as Shadow spoke again. "She..she'd ask me why. Why I left her on that ship and didn't look back," He let out a shaky sigh. "She died 50 years ago today..and her blood still stains my hands.." Shadow could barely finish his sentence before he broke down, breathing picking up as he began to hyperventilate. He didn't notice Sonic turning him and pulling him closer, hoping it would help. Thankfully it did, and although Shadow didn't calm down much, he did move his hands to Sonic's back, squeezing as tight as he could, afraid he would disappear just as Maria did.
"I-It was all my fault Sonic..I wasn't s-strong enough. I was created to protect her, that was my only purpose but I got her killed instead.." His voice was still wavering, words falling out of his mouth as he cried more, tears soaked up in Sonic's fur. "They were after me, Sonic. 'Project Shadow' was what they called me. If I had just given myself up, done..the right thing. Maybe then…she could've had a decent life. I loved her..so much. Oh Maria.." He struggled to say her name, choking on the word and sobbing continuously, starting to panic again. His heartbeat rang loud in his brain, giving him a headache as his throat began to close, his eyes squeezing shut. His breathing picked up as a result, every inhale being a sharp suck of air as he tried to fill his lungs to no avail. His ears twitched as his body shook in Sonic’s arms, his mind racing as his shoulders struggled to carry the guilt of what he’d done. Sonic was at a loss. There had been other times where Shadow had shattered under the weight of his actions, but it was the first time Sonic was struggling to help. He squeezed Shadow tighter, trying everything he could to ground him and calm him down, whispering sweet words of encouragement into his ear whilst rocking him back and forth slowly. It took some time, but eventually Shadow’s breathing slowed, his laboured breaths steadied, and his aggressive sobs and tears became more calm as he hiccuped.
The room was quiet, safe for Shadow’s occasional cries, until Sonic spoke up and broke that silence. “What would she want you to do, Shadow?” He asked, brushing the loose fur that fluffed out away from Shadow’s quills back into place. He took a few seconds to collect himself before pulling back and responding, voice still hoarse. “I’m not sure..she always wanted me to be happy, even without her…” He smiled subconsciously, remembering the time the two of them shared. “Her wish was always to go to Earth. Her illness meant she couldn’t but..before she died, she asked me to fulfil her wish and have the life she couldn’t..” Sonic held Shadow’s hand as he explained, his silent support making Shadow’s heart swell. “Then do that!" His exclamation caught Shadow off guard, but he listened nonetheless. “I may act like it, but I’m not an idiot. I understand how you feel. I’ve..lost people before. I know better than anyone that the pain never truly goes away.” Shadow felt tears building in his eyes for the second time in the last hour. He never knew Sonic could be so serious and empathetic. It was refreshing. Sonic wiped away the few tears that slid down Shadow’s face, resting his palm on Shadow’s cheek as he kept talking. “Keep going Shadow, as long as you can. If not for yourself then for her.” Shadow cried again, happy to have found someone that loved him, his past and his flaws just as much as Maria did. They smiled at each other before kissing, both being content in each other’s arms. "Thank you Sonic..thank you so much." Shadow croaked out between sobs. "That's what I'm here for Shad, don't you worry about it." [END]
