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"Delete our texts conversations and my contact."
The words are quick and 8th out of a uncertain boy. A boy that is grieving and anxious with all to come with his new responsibilities.
Simon sits in disbelief at what he's being told to do. He watches Wille get up without waiting for answer and leaves.
He doesn't think to himself,
What the hell?
While a part of himself wants to be angry at Wilhelm's harsh rejection of them, he can't. He understands why Wille has said what he has.
He's been deeply hurt by everything that has happened and now his empty plate is full to the brim. There's no room for a them anymore, especially now.
Wille's head is filled with so many loud conflicting thoughts he probably can't even thinking straight.
He gets it..... though his heart does hurt....
You can sit here and let him go.
Or
You can get up, follow him, and comfort him.
In a split decision Simon gets up and follows after Wille.
He has vague idea where Wille could've escaped to and turns the corner towards the dorms when he hears,
"Please! Can I please have a moment to myself!"
There's a beat of slience and Wille's distressed expression meets Simon's. His hands come down in defeat and Simon rushes over to him.
"Simon..." he whispers in awe that he is back at his side and Simon simply takes his hand. "Lets go to your room." Wille nods at Simon's soft voice and guides them to his room.
With the shut of the door Wille collapses on to his bed and runs his hand over his pounding heart. Simon scans Wille's hunched over frame and opens the curtains followed by the window. Cold air enters but he doesn't care if it meant it brought in some relief for his anxious boy. He rushes to Wilhelm's side and sits next to him. Thighs touching, his arm around Wille's spin and his tan hand on Wille's heart.
"Breath with me." He suggests sweetly and Wille nods frantically with the desire to breathe normally.
"In."
.
. .
. . .
"Out, good Wille."
Their eyes meet and, "in," Simon's chest expands and Wille's follows his pratice.
.
. .
. . .
"Out..." He exhales slowly with Wilhelm then repeats, "in-"
"Why...?"
"What?"
"Why are you here? Why are you helping me?"
Why did you follow me?
Simon gently takes the pale hand over Wille's now calming core and lets them rest on their laps.
If you wanted us to be strangers, why let me hold you?
Their hands naturally interweave and lock.
"Because I knew better," Simon starts, watching his thumb roam over the boney ridges of the back of Wille's hand. He draws his gaze away to meet in the middle, "I know you're grieving and hurt and that theres just too much going on for an us right now. That that's fine, I understand, but I also knew I couldn't let you just suffer alone."
I care for you too much to let you do that.
Tears form on the edges of Wille's waterline and his fingers cling around his welcoming ones. He drops his amber head upon Simon's shoulder and starts to cry into his Hillerska jacket.
"He's gone." Wille chokes and Simon pulls him close. His nose burying itself into Wille's hair. Simon wanting to place kisses against the other's scalp but fights against it.
He doesn't need a boyfriend, he needs a friend right now... and I can do that, I can be that for him.
Whatever he needs, I'll be here for him.