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Xingqiu likes to believe that being a bookworm comes hand in hand with being a hopeless romantic. It’s one of those universal facts, really, alongside the fact that almond tofu is atrociously named, or the fact that he and Miss Yelan having similar hairstyles despite being not related in the slightest is absolutely ridiculous. And he himself agrees exponentially with that statement. Ah, how much privilege he’d have at his feet to share blood with a formidable woman like her. To have an aunt so prominent in the shadow market. He could do the most diabolical things, like laugh maniacally while reading his light novels way before they’re out in print, like some sort of evil mastermind.

He’s aware he could do a lot worse than that, but his little teenage boy brain truthfully can’t think of anything worse than that. He supposes it must be a curse of being raised too well.

Anyway, back to the point. Bookworms. Hopeless romantic.

Xingqiu is a bookworm. He is also a hopeless romantic. Two things he has made explicitly, ridiculously, hair-pulling-out-of-frustration clear to none other than his best friend. Multiple times, across multiple occasions.

And Xingqiu, being this hopeless romantic that he really is, thus came to terms with his feelings pretty easy. Quite easy, in fact. He even read a whole book about it, so he was very well prepared.

“Step 1. Acknowledgement.”

He recalls doing quite well with that stage. He had sat in front of the large mirror hung on the far left wall of their home’s large lounge area, and said very loudly, clearly, with little to no hesitation “I, Xingqiu, am in love with my best friend, Chongyun.”

He had thought this revelation would be something shocking, possibly changing the entire balance of — well, everything — in his household. He wasn’t sure where his family stood about love between two boys. Certainly it wasn’t explicitly frowned upon, and even his parents made passing comments about the Tianquan and the Captain of the Crux fleet’s ridiculously drawn out romance that everyone in the entirely of Liyue and their pets were out waiting for the relationship announcement.

But you know, things are just different with your own kids. Like, how tattoos are seen as edgy and cool, and quote-unquote “esteemable” when even the Conqueror of Demons has it, but if he asked his parents right now for one, they’d probably have him out in the streets in a matter of seconds. Or worse, confiscate his yaoi light novel collection.

But, he digresses. What he means to say is, he wasn’t sure whether his confession would cause any waves in the family. But as he said the words his brother, parents, even their maid, didn’t so much as bat an eyelid. It was all very anticlimactic, really, that he had almost wished he had been yelled at. Just for the drama. The door slamming privileges.

He had even repeated himself, louder, in case they hadn’t heard. Or misheard. To which his brother replied with frankly offensive nonchalance, “a bit young for wedding vows, aren’t you? Wait a few years.”

So. Yeah. Turns out his family had known about his little fancies since he was a child.

Anyway, that’s why the “Acknowledgement” aspect of the list worked out quite splendidly. He put a nice green tick next to it, because of course he wrote it all down.

No, no. It was stage two that posed issues. Lots of issues.

“Stage 2. Gather up the courage to tell them.”

Now. Xingqiu is not a scared person. No sirree. Anyone who tells you otherwise would be, well, lying. Or telling half truths. He’s only ever screamed (in frustration, he might add) at terribly predictable plot twists, and that one time Chongyun took him to go exorcizing with him.

But see the thing is, Xingqiu is a hopeless romantic.

And, he’s definitely not ashamed to admit it. He’d even go so far as to say he’s a rather fussy one, at that.

He’s read far too many swooning tales of love struck heroes and heroines, sharing their first confession under a night of stars, or after a row of frustrating misunderstandings, or chasing after one another at such speeds, only to drop to their knees at the very end and proclaim, with utmost, unutterable certainty: I love you!

So yes, Xingqiu did not want to simply “gather up the courage” to tell Chongyun. No matter how fancy he’ll make it, no matter how many cheesy one-liners he’ll memorize, he simply won’t.

Why? The reason is simple. Xingqiu wants to be romanced.

The conclusion, however, is not so simple. Why?

Because Chongyun is a bit of an idiot.

Mind, Xingqiu loves that about him. He loves everything about Chongyun. The boy’s straightforward — admittedly dense — persona is hopelessly endearing to him. Positively adorable.

But you see, this also means it is absolutely impossible to try and imply anything, least of all romantic, without having to spell it out for the boy. And he can’t exactly scream “I want to be romanced by you, please confess in a romantic and memorable way!” now can he?

Now you may be asking, Xingqiu, how can you be sure he even likes you back? Aren’t you getting a little ahead of yourself?

To which he will laugh at you. Why? Because he is a…

…

Hopeless romantic!

He’s seen the signs. The way Chongyun goes a cute little red when he gets a little too close. The way he doesn’t pull away when Xingqiu holds his hand to drag him somewhere. The way his eyes very slightly dart to his lips when he thinks Xingqiu isn’t looking (how frivolous!)

Anywho, it’s obvious. Everyone knows they have a thing going on. It’s just about damn time one of them does something about it.

Archons, he’s almost turning sixteen soon. Staying single at that age is just embarrassing. Next thing you know he’ll end up being the new generation of loners, the next Conqueror of Demons (if he’s listening right now, please forgive that statement, but it’s very true and everyone knows it.)

So. This all inevitably leads Xingqiu to the conclusion he finds today, having finished his imported light novel from Inazuma, characteristically lovey dovey and very, very inspirational!

He won’t go into a boring description about the summary, and reading the back of the novel is a pain since they removed an actual comprehensive blurb and replaced it with quotes from critics about the book (seriously, whoever came up with that godawful idea, who hurt you?)

But the whole plot in one sentence? Hanahaki disease. Where one is cursed to cough up flower petals unless they confess their feelings to the one they love and they’re accepted. Or something like that.

Sounds horrible, he agrees. How gruesome, albeit rather poetic, in a sense.

Of course he’s aware it’s not real — he’s not that swept away that he can’t tell the lines between fiction and reality — but Chongyun doesn’t know that.

Alright this may be a little evil, but really it’s for their own good! This little prank will be an investment into their future relationship, where they can joke and laugh about it to the future generation of Liyuens.

One could argue Chongyun really could use this nudge in the right direction! The boy — gods, he loves him, he really does — is awkward enough as it is.

It’s simple really. Convince Chongyun he has hanahaki, and make him come to the conclusion himself that he needs it confess to his “crush” (aka: him)

Which brings them to the present. They’re sitting at a low table in his dining room right now. He’s the only one home, and his best friend in question has fallen asleep with his head in his arms bent over the table in the cutest fashion. Xingqiu knew a reading session would bore the boy right to sleep.

Now for the next phase of his plan.

He strokes Chongyun’s hair sweetly, and murmurs quietly, almost to himself, “ah, my sweet, sweet boy. You have no idea what’s in store for you.”

Lovingly, of course.

He pulls out a glaze lily, slightly squashed, from his pocket — because glaze lilies are the most romantic flowers in Liyue and he’s all for symbolism.

He loosens up a few petals, brushes off flecks of dust on it and…

… shoves it into Chongyun’s mouth.

The boy’s a heavy sleeper, so he doesn’t wake up immediately.

Xingqiu pauses. Takes a moment to applaud his own cleverness.

Then he whacks Chongyun on the back of his head.

The boy startles, jolting up like he’d been electrocuted, head flying around in every direction.

Xingqiu carefully molds his expression into his most horrified look, “oh dear! Chongyun! Chongyun!”

“Wha?” The boy says dizzily, but his voice is muffled, and he spits out the glaze lily.

He stares at it, dripping with saliva, on the table, for a few shocked seconds, before gagging and coughing out more petals.

Okay. Maybe he did lay it on a little thick. Whoops.

Feeling slightly guilty, he rubs Chongyun’s back to help the boy gather himself better, and once he has, he continues in his scared-yet-concerned voice, “dear me, Chongyun! I fear the worst. Oh dear, oh dear, it’s worse than I thought.”

… okay so he may not be the best of actors. Look, he’s no Yunjin. But Chongyun is a bit of an idiot (affectionate) and the boy doesn’t pick up on his clearly superficial tone.

“What?” He chokes out, peeling the last petal off of his tongue with a grimace, “what’s going on, Xingqiu? Why was there a glaze lily in my mouth?”

“My dear liege,” replies Xingqiu solemnly, “that glaze lily was not merely from your mouth, but your lungs.”

“… eh?”

“It’s the hanahaki disease if I’ve ever seen it!” Xingqiu laments, clutching Chongyun’s hand tightly, “but my sweet Chongyun! I don’t want you to die! You’re too young! You’ve got so much to live for!”

Finally, Chongyun’s eyes open wide, wide as sunsettias, “hana-what disease? Die?! Xingqiu, what are you saying?!”

“I’m afraid you have all the symptoms.” Xingqiu replies with a sigh, whipping out his light novel for visual representation, “hanahaki is a disease originating from Inazuma. It’s an illness that leads to the person getting respiratory fits and coughs, due to flowers growing — I presume — inside their chest. They cough up petals, and as the days go by, it will slowly become worse and worse until it becomes terminal!”

Chongyun looks frightfully flabbergasted, “terminal?! Y-You’re messing with me, aren’t you? You just shoved a glaze lily in my mouth and is trying to scare me!”

“Now why on earth would I do that? You think it would amuse me?” Chongyun opens his mouth to say that yes it really would but he continues before he has a chance, “I have no motive for shoving a plant in your mouth! I’m not a vegan like Ganyu is. I love meat!”

“So…” Chongyun says weakly, “this hanahaki disease is… real?”

“As real as I am Liyuen, my liege.”

“And I’m going to d-die?” The broken whisper almost makes Xingqiu feel completely guilty about all of this.

Almost.

“But worry not, there is a cure!”

This perks the boy up, at least.

“You love someone, don’t you, Chongyun?”

The boy’s face and ears and neck turn red immediately, which is simply adorable, and he stutters, “wh-what makes you say that?”

“You wouldn't have this disease if you don’t. You see, the disease stems from holding your true feelings from the other person. Quite simply, you need to confess to them. If they accept your feelings, you’re cured. Simple as!”

But of course, Chongyun catches the other implications, “and if they don’t, I… die?”

He falters, “well. Yes. I suppose.”

But that’s not an issue here, dimwit.

Xingqiu grins and slings an arm around the boy’s shoulder, “oh, cheer up. It’s just a confession. You can do this.” He clears his throat, “that being said, the confession should be very grand and romantic, okay? Nothing anticlimactic.”

Here Xingqiu is, quite literally spelling it out that Chongyun should just get on with it and confess, but the boy completely, predictably glosses over it all. Unbelievable.

“Are you sure there’s no other way?” He pleads.

“Quite sure.”

“It’s just,” Chongyun rubs his neck sheepishly, “the person I like… it’s… I’d be… it’ll be weird.”

Considering the situation at the present, it already was.

“Chongyun,” Xingqiu sighs, “I should think that life is more important than a few hesitant shyness!”

“Yes but if he— they reject me, then I’ll die anyway! So it is important!” Insists Chongyun.

But you won’t die! Xingqiu wants to scream, because I won’t reject you!

He can’t say any of this though, so he just stays silent, feeling a dawn of instant regret wash over him as he realizes that his flawless plan forgot to consider one thing.

This was Chongyun he’s talking about.

“Well, then, what do you suppose we do? Huh?” He says to the boy irritably, “just say nothing and let you die anyway? At least if you confess, you have a chance of being cured!”

“I’m sure there’s another way,” Chongyun says firmly, “yes. I’m sure there is.”

“Uh huh? Such as?”

He falls silent.

Xingqiu sticks his chin up, smug, “see? So—”

Chongyun mumbles something.

“Pardon?”

He mumbles louder. Something along the lines of “hoo haa”.

“Speak louder, Chongyun dear, you know how old and deaf I'm growing.” He deadpans dryly.

Chongyun raises his eyes and fiercely meets his eyes, “Hu. Tao.”

Oh god. Instant regret. Everything. Why does he even bother with these things?

✳︎✳︎✳︎

“I thought you hated Hu Tao?” Hisses Xingqiu as he finds the two of them in front of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlour, standing at the front door yet neither wanting to knock.

And it’s very true. Sometimes Xingqiu intentionally brings up the subject of the girl only to see how predictably angry it makes Chongyun, cheeks puffed up and brows furrowed in the most adorable fashion.

“I do.” Says Chongyun, “but if anyone knows more about d-death and terminal illness, it’s her.”

Archons.

“That or Dr Baizhu.” Xingqiu rolls his eyes, and Chongyun stops, looking like he’s suddenly feeling very stupid.

“Oh. Yes. That’s a much better idea. Let’s run.”

Before he can, however, the door flings open with a flourish and there stands none other than the director herself.

“Aiya, I’ve been expecting you!” She grins at the two of them behind those blood blossom eyes.

Chongyun, for all his scowling, looks right terrified, “you have?”

Xingqiu, who knows very well she says that to all guests to freak them out, just rolls his eyes and ushers them into the place to sit down. The interior is characteristically dull, as expected for a funeral house, but little touches here and there reveal the liveliness of their director. Paintings, vases, a stupid little doodle of Mr Zhongli taped to a far wall.

Once they tell Hu Tao everything, who silently listens to it all with that same unchanging smile of hers, Chongyun shifts on the spot.

“So yes. That’s the story. I was hoping you’d… I don’t know… be able to help me? Since you’re so well versed with death and… all that…” he falters, looking suddenly suffocatingly awkward, “look I know we’ve had our differences, but how about we call a truce? Hm?”

He sticks out his hand for her to shake.

The girl just grins wider, using a pencil to slowly push his hand away, and leans forward with her elbows on her knees, “ah, how romantic! What a lovely story. But, exorcist, have you forgotten what I am? Why on Teyvat would I help you avoid this terminal illness, when this is clearly a very good chance for me to do business!”

Chongyun looks appalled beyond words, “you mean you— you’re crazy! You’re seriously allowing this, one of your friends to die because of your business?”

“Oh we’re friends now, are we?” Hu Tao grins coyly.

Xingqiu can’t handle this. Already, his plan is being skyrocketed to heights he did not prepare for, and he feels plainly stupid that he didn’t consider a backup plan in case Chongyun predictably managed to upturn such a simple idea.

He’s also slightly offended, really, that the boy is more willing to set aside his differences with Hu Tao than confess to him. It’s not like he bites. He’s a perfectly decent person!

… who happily let his best friend believe he has a terminal illness to squeeze a confession out of him. Okay, touché, inner voice.

“Look.” He says grumpily, “if you help us, and things go all happily ever after with his lover, then you’d be securing yourself a two in one deal later on, when they’re married and retired and pass away as a lovely unassuming couple. Think of it as an investment into your future, Hu Tao.”

“Xingqiu!” Chongyun exclaims, scandalized, that familiar heat back on his face.

Meanwhile Hu Tao actually seems to be contemplating this, “hm. You make a good point.”

Chongyun turns to her, “Hu Tao!”

She raises a delicate eyebrow at him, “you wanted my help, no?”

He closes his mouth.

“Then here. Let me give you my advice.” She twirls her pencil between her fingers before lightly smacking him over the head with it, “hanahaki disease… yes I think I have heard my grandfather mention this before. I believe I studied it as well.”

Xingqiu looks at her in surprise, because he knows damn well her family don’t study this sort of thing, folktale or not. It’s only when Chongyun’s not looking that she flashes him a sly wink, and he realizes she must have picked up on his bullshit the moment they walked in.

But this is Hu Tao they’re talking about. She’d never resist a good prank. On Chongyun, most of all.

He finds himself unable to resist a grin. Well then, maybe this won’t be so bad.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

He honestly wonders why he never hangs out with Hu Tao all that much, because after that day, he’s convinced that the entirety of Liyue is in on some grand conspiracy to keep the two from interacting so that they don’t evolve into some menacing prank master duo.

It’s also a little pitiful how easily Chongyun is able to be swept away by the sort of bullshit she spurts from her mouth.

She had told him, point blank, that “Hanahaki disease has only one cure — which is confession, and even that is dependent on the response of the latter person. I can’t help you find a loophole out of this one, buddy!”

Chongyun had groaned, then, looking mortified, which hopefully meant he had finally understood what he needed to do in order to cure himself. Xingqiu was delighted.

But it seems the boy is still, even now, trying to exhaust every other possible option before even considering the most logical and obvious one.

He had asked her, earnestly, if there really wasn’t anything else she could do.

To which she replied that perhaps she could help him, not exactly to cure the illness, but instead help him in some way to deal with the disease.

Which is how they find themselves at present, seated at Wanmin Restaurant with a bowl of Xiangling’s most stomach-churning dish bubbling on the table. It’s a rancid, sickly green, and — according to the chef — made from an exquisite blend of dendro and geo slime condensate. It looks horrific.

Chongyun, at the seat before the dish, turns the same sickly shade as the meal, “do I… do I really have to eat this?”

“Oh yes,” nods Hu Tao very seriously, “you must. You see, this is a trial to test your tolerance. In a relationship you need to grow to tolerate your partner’s flaws, and love them regardless.”

It’s utter hogwash, and Xingqiu tries very hard to maintain a straight face, but at least Chongyun buys it.

“So… these trials are to prepare me for the confession?”

“Precisely!”

Chongyun inhales slowly through his nose, like he’s gathering all his strength imaginable to allow even one sip. Honestly, Xingqiu doesn’t blame him. The sludgy texture of the food makes it look more like dyed mud than actual edible stew.

Chongyun finally lifts his spoon to his lips, and takes a slow, slurping sip.

He blinks.

Takes another one.

And another. And another.

“You know, this isn’t half bad.” He says between mouthfuls with a relieved grin, and proceeds to devour up the slime stew like it’s nothing.

So immersed in his new five star meal, he hardly seems to notice when Hu Tao pulls a Kamera out from behind her and snaps a picture at the scene, chuckling to herself.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

According to Hu Tao, the next trial was designed to test patience and resilience. To not give up after facing failure over and over. To have a steel will to continue in the face of adversity.

Naturally, Shitou’s (very clearly rigged) betting on jade was decidedly the best way to go for this one.

Xingqiu paid for all the gambling — seriously, 600 mora was nothing to him — and watched as Chongyun selected wrong ones over and over and over and over.

At least Shitou finally seems to take pity on the boy after the twelve round (Xingqiu now being 7200 mora short) and lets him win, if only to get them to leave him alone.

Normally Xingqiu wasn’t too fond of the man, but in this particular occasion he did them a favor by remaining characteristically infuriating with his cheat games, and as they depart he gives the man a grin and a wink. He was given a sour scowl in return. Charming, really.

It’s only once they get to the last trial — “fragility” as Hu Tao puts it — where Chongyun was to hold one of Hu Tao’s beloved butterflies for five minutes straight, which Xingqiu had assumed to be a relatively straightforward task until he saw that Chongyun was unbelievably terrified of the little creature, that it finally dawns on the boy that he is being messed with.

Hu Tao fishes out her Kamera, flipping through the pictures of Chongyun in various shades of struggle, and bursts out laughing.

“You—“ Chongyun clenches his fist in outrage, butterfly on his shoulder swiftly forgotten, “this was all a joke?!”

“Ehehe…” Hu Tao grins, ear to ear, “perhaps a little.”

“Your family don’t have anything to do with hanahaki, does it?” Chongyun hisses between gritted teeth.

She shrugs in a way that says “isn’t it obvious?” Like it’s his own fault for not catching on.

“You’re insane!” He snaps, “I can’t believe you made me do all of those things!

“Oh, it was all in good fun. Relax.” She cooes, which only enrages him further, until he has to take deep soothing breaths and a bite of his popsicle to calm himself down.

Perhaps things would have turned out a lot worse if they hadn’t been interrupted at that moment, graced by another familiar presence, with a head of pink hair peeking out through the door.

Yanfei sees Hu Tao and walks straight in, and Xingqiu feels the girl freeze imperceptibly beside her, before plastering a grin wider than ever, “ah, Yanfei! To what do I owe the pleasure? Finally reconsidered my offer of the advanced plan to ensure a smooth passing? Even the adepti themselves aren’t immune to death!”

Yanfei, for all her grace that Xingqiu’s seen even in court, rolls her eyes, “Hu Tao, what have you been doing? Haven’t I told you to keep out of trouble?”

“Oh dear, what has the legal consultant got to scold me for this time?”

“Harassment complaints, again. Hu Tao, this really must stop. I’ve managed to get my client to drop any legal action, but you do realize if one of these really does go ahead, I’ll be forced to take action against you in court.”

“Your reluctance to do so already is very flattering,” purrs Hu Tao with a smug grin.

Yanfei doesn’t return it, “I have been directed to inform you that any further attempts to intimidate, menace, or threaten Qiqi in any way shall be considered a violation of the law, and will be dealt with accordingly."

This makes Hu Tao laugh, “what, that child hired a lawyer against me?”

“Well she just came up to me the other day and complained, but Dr Baizhu very much told me he’s considering it.”

“Aiya, so unexpected! I’m not intimidating, menacing or threatening her. I’m simply doing what’s best for her.”

“Regardless,” replies Yanfei tiredly, “just try not to do it anymore. Please? For me?”

And Hu Tao, for once, actually looks at her with genuine eyes, “eugh. Fine. For your sake.”

From beside him, watching this situation unfold, Chongyun whispers to Xingqiu, “I’ve never seen Hu Tao be so willing to listen to anyone like this. There’s definitely something fishy going on.”

Xingqiu just gapes at him, “you’re kidding right?”

Chongyun blinks.

Xingqiu sighs. He’s not kidding, is he?

“She’s listening to Yanfei simply because it’s Yanfei.” He tries to explain.

Chongyun stares blankly at him.

“Chongyun,” He looks at him, “she’s into her.”

“Into… her…?” And then, at once, the realization hits, “oh.”

Finally.

“She’s— oh dear.” Chongyun has a look in his face that spells trouble..

“What are you thinking?”

Chongyun just strolls over to the two women, uncharacteristically cheery, halting their conversation with a tap on Hu Tao’s shoulder.

Then he hands her the butterfly. “I think you’ll be needing this more than I will.”

Hu Tao for the most part catches on relatively quickly, and glares at him, but her ears are flared a dusty shade of red and that’s enough to satisfy him, at the very least.

“Well! We best be going!” Xingqiu chirps, taking the presence of Yanfei as an excuse to finally leave and commence with this plan, waving goodbye and half-tugging half-dragging Chongyun out of the funeral parlor.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

Out in the open harbor, Chongyun turns to Xingqiu looking dismal once again. The sun is hanging high and smack bang in the middle of the sky, beating down hard, and half of Xingqiu wishes he knew it would be this hot so he’d have known to put some sun-blocking lotion. If this keeps up he’ll end up looking like a grilled crab by the end of the day. Gods.

“Well. She was no help.”

“Told you.”

Chongyun pauses for a few moments, lost in thought, before saying, “I think I know what we need to do now.”

Finally. “I’m glad it’s finally sunk in, Chongyun. Now, remember, confessions are a big deal! They must be carefully considered—”

“What?” He interrupts, “that’s not what I meant. We need to go see the Crux fleet.”

“… say what now?”

“To take us to Inazuma of course! The disease originated there, so surely there must be someone who can help us deal with it there!”

Xingqiu really isn’t sure whether to laugh or cry or be completely offended at the lengths his friend is willing to go to avoid confessing to him. First Hu Tao, now Inazuma?

Archons, he’s regretting all of this already.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

By sheer coincidence, this month marked one where the Alcor was very rarely docked at the harbor. Normally, the warship is off on the seas, or situated very tediously near Guyun Stone Forest, so it was honestly a relief to Xingqiu that they didn’t have to make quite a trek to reach their destination, while simultaneously feeling resentful that he’s being dragged on yet another side quest that he did not plan or expect.

It’s relatively easy, almost too easy, to simply walk on board, find Captain Beidou and voice their request.

“You want to what now, kid?” She looks flabbergasted. Honestly, Xingqiu can’t blame her. He feels very much the same, “Inazuma? Archons, we aren’t a travel agency! Lumine, I can understand why she needed to go. But I’m not dishing out free rides to just about anyone. Where are your parents?”

Chongyun just looks at her pleadingly, “but, Captain, this is serious!”

“Oh yeah? How so?” She raises a skeptical eyebrow.

The boy falters, “I… I… I have flowers growing in my lungs and coming out of my mouth.”

Beidou doesn’t say anything for a long time, looking at them like she isn’t sure whether or not she’s being messed with.

Realizing how genuine they were being (well, Chongyun was), she lets out a long drawn out sigh, “okay yknow what? I’m not taking you to Inazuma, but how about this? You can have your very own at-home Inazuman to talk to and complain about whatever it is that’s so urgent. He too, is someone who opens his mouth and flowers come out.”

Chongyun looks far too happy at those words, so Xingqiu mutters, “I think she means metaphorically.”

“Oh.” He says, not so happy anymore.

“Kazuha!” Beidou calls out, and soon after a boy approaches them. Blonde with red streaks, Inazuman. Friendly face.

“You called, Captain?” He says in a soft voice. Like the breeze. It’s very soothing.

“Yeah. These guys need to talk to you. See ya.” And with that, she skulks off without another word.

Kazuha blinks at them.

Xingqiu resists the urge to roll his eyes and sulk at how brilliantly his plan has failed on him. Things could have been going so differently already — Chongyun could have confessed his affections, be “cured” and then they could have already been on their readily established first date as boyfriend-boyfriend.

Instead, they’re here, in a boat in front of some random Inazuma guy who looks very much like he smokes grass on the daily.

Meanwhile, Chongyun staring at the man with unmasked awe, “are you really from Inazuma?”

“Born and raised.” Replies Kazuha with a grin, “to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Uh.” Chongyun rubs the back of his neck, sheepish, “do you know what… hanahaki disease is?”

A frown. “The folktale?”

From behind Chongyun, Xingqiu tries his hardest to catch the man’s eye, shuffling on the spot, wiggling his eyebrows. And when they finally lock gazes, he puts on his most pleading look.

Kazuha, thankfully, catches on quickly, “ah. Apologies, I was getting mixed up with something else. Yes, I am aware of the disease.”

“Y-You mean it’s real?” Chongyun stutters, “I have it!”

“I see.” Replies Kazuha with ease, “how unfortunate.”

“It’s more than unfortunate!” He cries out, “I’m going to die!”

“Could die.” Corrects Kazuha, “if the object of your affections changes their mind and accepts you, you’ll be cured. It’s not for certain you’ll die.”

“Wait, what? What do you mean by ‘changing their mind’?”

Oh boy.

“Well, the disease starts if your love is already unrequited, no?” Kazuha replies, too late to notice the aggressive signals to stop talking that Xingqiu is furiously flashing behind him. When he finally does, he falters, “at least I… think so…?”

But the damage is already done.

“Whaaaat?!” Wails Chongyun with his hands in his hair, “you mean to tell me that this love is unrequited anyway? That means I’m doomed! Doomed!”

“You are jumping to the wildest conclusions!” Snaps Xingqiu. He can’t help it, “you have no idea they’ll say no.”

“I’m going to die,” laments Chongyun miserably.

“You’re not going to—”

He wails.

“Will you just listen—”

He wails louder.

Xingqiu glares at Kazuha, who smiles apologetically in turn.

The ruckus causes Beidou to return, at least.

“Oy, what’s all this about dying? Why are you crying, kid?”

“I’m going to die!”

“What?” She gapes.

“He thinks his crush is unrequited, Captain.” Says Kazuha slowly. He looks amused, which is a bit irritating but Xingqiu is also aware that if his love life wasn’t on the line, he too would find these series of unfortunate events to be hilarious.

“Captain, you must convince him that he’s being ridiculous!” Pleads Xingqiu, “even if it is unrequited, there’s really no harm in telling them anyway, right?”

Beidou doesn't seem to agree, “I dunno, kid. No harm? Personally, I’d rather surrender myself to the jaws of Haishan than live with the knowledge that my romantic advances aren’t appreciated. Better to keep your dignity and heart than have it trampled and crushed from under you.”

Xingqiu literally cannot believe what he’s hearing — Captain Beidou, fearsome ruler of the Crux warship fleet and slayer of the great beast Haishan — is a bit too scared to talk to her crush.

He doesn’t know whether he wants to laugh or cry.

Beidou seizes Chongyun’s shoulders and looks him dead in the eye, “kid, take it from me. If you truly believe your love is hopeless, don’t say a thing. Don’t act on it. It’ll only cause you more pain.”

Kazuha and Xingqiu both facepalm in sync, with a loud resounding smack.

Chongyun sniffles and nods at her words.

“Now I finally understand why the Beigguang agenda is taking so damn long.” Mutters Xingqiu resentfully.

“Huh?!” Beidou yelps.

Kazuha bursts out laughing.

Xingqiu just takes Chongyun by the elbow, waving at Kazuha and Beidou, and drags him away, “cmon, crybaby. Let’s get out of here. Maybe getting love advice from someone who has her own love issues wasn’t the best idea.”

“Eh? What do you mean?” Replies Chongyun with a sniffle. Because of course if there’s one person Teyvat who doesn’t know about Beidou and Ningguang’s romantic tension, it’s Chongyun.

“Let’s get advice from someone else. Someone wise, who has the sort of profound wisdom we need in a time like this.” He stops, and thinks for a moment, “and I think I know just the person.”

✳︎✳︎✳︎

“Hanahaki disease is grounded in Inazuman folklore, derived from the Japanese words of hana meaning flower and hakimasu meaning to throw up. As such, combining the two words together, you get the main symptom of the disease — that is to say, coughing up flower petals. Other symptoms include respiratory fits and eventual death, and the only known cure is one that is confession, and having the feelings returned to you by the object of your affections. While no one can really say when exactly the legend originated, due to a very romantic grounding in the legend, it’s gained some momentum particularly in the Inazuman light novel industry these past few decades, providing a solid basis for many romance novels to come.”

Xingqiu listens to Mr Zhongli talk with lidded eyes that feel close to closing. To his left, he can see that Chongyun is looking very much the same.

Gods the man can talk like he’s reading a will. At least Xingqiu knows that if he’s ever suffering from insomnia again, he knows who to call.

The pearl galley was a bit more difficult to get on board unlike the alcor, and Xingqiu wished they had just given up, because now they’re having a whole history lesson given to them by this man when the only thing they asked was “do you know what Hanahaki disease is?”

The man pauses, and for a delusional hopeful second Xingqiu thinks he’s finally done. Only to realize he was taking a sip of his tea and looks ready to continue his monologue.

Xingqiu stands up abruptly, “wow, Mr Zhongli! That was very informative. Thank you. I think we’ll leave now, since we now know what it is. We were just curious.”

Even Chongyun looks relieved to finally get away.

“Oh?” Blinks Mr Zhongli, “I’m very glad I could be of assistance. Take care, children.”

Xingqiu really can’t comprehend how this man of early twenties is able to bore him more than his own grandfather. But whatever. At least they can leave now.

Except when they turn to leave, someone else enters the deck and almost bumps into them.

“Xiansheng! I was just looking for you. Oh, who are these guys?” The man waves past them towards Mr Zhongli, and he realizes it’s the ginger Snezhnayan harbinger who almost destroyed Liyue.

This day just keeps getting better and better.

He’s about to smile politely and tug Chongyun away, but he catches the look on his friend’s face and stops.

“No.” He hisses into Chongyun’s ear, “absolutely not. Don’t even think about—”

He is typically ignored, “Can you help us figure something out? You’re from Snezhnaya aren’t you? Perhaps an outsider’s perspective will help us figure out what to do.”

Figure out what to do? Xingqiu’s told him! Literally told him! He’s spelt it out! Chongyun knows what to do! Why, oh why, just why is he doing this to him?!?!

“Oh?” Childe raises a brow, curiosity piqued.

“I was just telling them about the hanahaki disease.” Mr Zhongli pipes up from behind them.

“Hana what?”

Chongyun launches into a brief explanation, quickly, before Mr Zhongli gets a chance to repeat his article again.

Childe listens patiently, and when the boy’s done speaking, nods carefully, “I see. Sounds serious, comrade. We must purge this immediately.”

“I agree!” Xingqiu says quickly, “he must confess! He has to. It’s his best bet at being healed.”

“Are you kidding?” The man scoffs, shaking his head, and Xingqiu feels yet another part of him die a little, “no! Giving into it? That’s a coward’s route. The flower does not control you! You need to show it who’s boss! When life gives you lemons, youngster, you squeeze it back into life’s eyes!”

Xingqiu really is starting to think that it would have been so much less hassle if he just planned a candlelight dinner instead.

Childe pats Chongyun’s shoulders gruffly, “listen, boy. That plant is not the boss of you. Got it? You need to just fight it! Resist it!”

“But how?” Says the boy, miserably.

“I’m actually not sure,” the man shrugs, which is very helpful indeed, “I’ve never fought a plant disease before. But whenever I find myself stuck with a formidable opponent that is difficult to beat, training and practice is all you need to finally overcome it.”

Xingqiu scoffs, “what, so you suggest we just go around, stomping on flowers and beating up trees?”

The man laughs heartily, “of course not. Hm, Xiansheng, where was that place you were telling me about the other day? Of a great formidable plant beast that the traveler likes to fight a lot?”

It dawns on Xingqiu before Mr Zhongli even utters the word, and he simply stares in horror at the Snezhnayan and his psychotic plan that they’ve been dragged into.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

As they stand at the edge of the humid cave of the pyro regisvine, deep enough to feel the oppressive heat, but far enough not to wake it up just yet, Xingqiu takes the time to just reflect on what exactly went wrong. He’s been doing that constantly, he notices, throughout the day but it feels as though every new obstacle they face is yet another nail in the coffin he is going to crawl into when it finally ends.

Okay, in retrospect, trying to force your best friend to confess to you by making him believe he has hanahaki disease wasn’t exactly his best plan, and the fact that descended into such chaos… really, he should have known better.

He should have known that things are never simple with Chongyun. That’s just what he loves about him.

But archons. Being trialed by a funeral director, getting dubious advice from a pirate, and being dragged to fight an overgrown weed by a Snezhnayan war criminal was not on his yearly bingo card.

But whatever. They’re here now.

“Alright!” Grins Childe, summoning his water blades, “let’s fight this thing.”

“You are insanity.” Deadpans Xingqiu.

“All the best people are,” winks the man, not even bothering to give a heads up or anything as he launches himself forward, steadfastly awakening the plant and lashing at its pyro core in hysterical, eager slashes.

The hydro eventually vaporizes the core enough to paralyze it, and once it collapses at his feet, he turns to Xingqiu and Chongyun with a grin.

“And now, you show it who’s boss!”

“How?” gawks Chongyun.

“Like this of course.” Says Childe, and kicks it. Hard. “Take that, you overgrown daisy! And that! Nyah! Hwah! Pow!” He kicks it, over and over, slashes it with his blades, using his ultimate attack, with mania contorted across his vision, “say it with me now: I! Will! Not! Give! In!”

Chongyun stays back for a while, silently, and for a moment Xingqiu thinks he’s about to make a wise decision and back out, only to roll his eyes when Chongyun runs over to Childe’s side.

He kicks the collapsed plant vigorously, “I! Will! Not! Give! In!”

Xingqiu drinks in the sight before him, endeared by Chongyun and appalled by the Snezhnayan’s, and satisfied to simply stand on the sidelines and watch this play out without having the energy to stop it or join in.

At least his friend seems to be having some fun. That is, until the plant recovers its core and awakens again, thrashing around and smacking both of Childe and Chongyun in the face, flinging them forcefully back.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

“It was your fault.” Xingqiu points out as he tends to the mild burn on Chongyun’s cheek with an ice pack,“who in their right mind would follow Tartaglia anywhere? The man’s a maniac.”

From below him on a stool, Chongyun looks right miserable. He sniffs.

“Now, now, don’t be like that.” Xingqiu chides, feeling affection fill to the brim like a wave so strong it’s almost staggering, “you’ll be fine, Chongyun.”

“Xingqiu…” he says slowly.

He freezes for a moment, and he thinks this might just be it. Finally, after exhausting every other option available, he’s finally going to say what Xingqiu had planned all along. He doesn’t even care for the grandiose aspect of it anymore. He just wants to hear him say the words. Three words.

He’d say it, and they’d embrace. He’d finally, finally feel those lips against his, his hand in his. They’d finally be an item, he can finally start calling him his boyfriend rather than best friend. It will all start now, and he can feel it coming like the burning of a sunrise.

“Yes?” He replies, trying to keep his voice steady in the giddy anticipation.

“I never knew Mr Zhongli and that Snezhnayan were acquainted. Are they friends?”

And just like that, Xingqiu’s fantasy breaks apart like shattered glass.

He doesn’t know what’s worse, that or the fact that Chongyun is honestly so blind as to assume Childe’s attachment to Zhongli is anything but blatant simpery (but hey, he’s not one to judge.)

Either way, he’s saved from responding by a throat being cleared next to them, where Qiqi stands — ever so small, eyes big and looking simply adorable — hand held out expectantly.

“Here.” He hands her the money, unable to resist patting her head before they leave the pharmacy.

If there’s one blessing that’s come out of this whole day, it’s that Dr Baizhu isn’t here to become another person roped into this endless list of hanahaki companions.

As they descend the steps, the sky is a burnt sunset dusk, like fire bursting above them, and he stops to admire it. A clear and beautiful day, such a good omen yet his plan failed spectacularly. He can’t believe the whole day has passed already.

As they turn to walk back to the harbor, they bump into yet another familiar face.

“Aunty?” Chongyun calls out, and a woman with milk white hair and spectral eyes, standing near the Yuehuai pavilion ponds, turns slowly.

Shenhe blinks in rapid succession and opens her arms when Chongyun launches over to hug her.

“What brings you here?” He asks, sounding the happiest he’s been the whole day. It’d be cute, really, if she wasn’t so evil.

“I came for dinner.” She replies, no discernible emotion on her face, stroking his hair and patting his back.

“Oh, from Wanmin?”

She shakes her head, “no. The pharmacy.”

He blinks up at her, and she pulls out a qingxin from her pocket, plucking a petal and popping it into her mouth.

They stare at her.

She chews it.

Finally, with a shake of his head, Chongyun buries his head in her shoulder and mumbles, “well at least we’re matching now.”

“What do you mean?”

He stays silent for a few beats before saying, “apparently I have this hanahaki disease. It’s from Inazuma, and it means that if the person I love doesn’t love me back, flowers will grow inside me and I will cough up petals until I die.”

Shenhe, all things considered, seems relatively calm in the face of this heavy revelation, but her jaw clenches imperceptibly, and her eyes harden, “I have never heard of such a thing.”

Her nephew shrugs without a word.

She shakes her head harshly, “no. I refuse. I will not allow this to happen. I will not let my nephew succumb to such a fate. Never. Come, I’ll bring you to my master. She’ll know a way to heal you. She has to. Even if she has to use her adeptal arts when doing so.”

Xingqiu, being the innate prankster he is, has a principal. No pranks can ever go too far. Sure, that may sound bold, but at least in his case, his pranks have always — for the most part — been relatively safe and harmless. The same can’t be said for other pranksters (cough, Hu Tao, cough).

However, he does think that getting the adepti involved in his little self-created romance plot may be pushing it a bit.

So, with panic seizing his gut, he butts in.

“Um. Miss Shenhe? Can I speak to you for a moment? Privately?”

He pulls her to one of the pavilions viewing the harbor from above, and turns to her.

And he tells her everything.

It’s thickly awkward, and with every word coming out of his mouth wrong, making it sound far worse than it actually is. He’s always known the woman never liked him, but after this stunt, he’d be lucky if she didn’t put a price on his head.

She doesn’t react much, but then again she hardly ever does. But he’s gotten on this woman’s bad side far too many times to know when she’s angry. And boy, right now, he feels like he may as well be grilled alive from the heat those death glares are giving him.

“So…” he concludes, a little clumsily, “I’d appreciate if you don’t tell him. It’s a little— hey, where are you going?!”

He runs after her as she turns on her heel and goes back to Chongyun, who’s looking increasingly confused and curious about the two of them.

“There’s nothing to worry about, Chongyun. Your friend has informed me that it was all fake.”

His face falls slack. He looks at her, then at Xingqiu. His hand slides up to feel his throat with the tips of his finger, and he doesn’t say a word for a long few seconds.

Then:

“What?”

“What?!” Xingqiu echoes, dumbstruck, “Miss Shenhe?! Why?!”

“If miscommunication continues, it will lead to far worse consequences in the future.” She replies calmly, like she did this out of logical concern and not because she hates his guts, “that’s why it’s better to remain upfront about things, particularly when it comes to matters of the heart.” Then, almost as an afterthought, she adds: “it is one of the reasons I disapprove of the way Ganyu carries herself around the Yuheng.”

Despite the situation, and the dawning betrayal, Chongyun stops at those words, “Ganyu loves Lady Keqing?”

Xingqiu side-eyes him, “you really need to get out more.”

He turns to him furiously, “that doesn’t change the fact that you lied! Why, Xingqiu! Why?”

Truthfully, he’s never seen such anger from Chongyun directed at him before. Even in the past, no matter the joke, no matter the prank, Chongyun always shook it off, always forgave him. Never let himself be angry for anymore than a few hot moments.

But here, he looks positively scalded, and that’s what stops Xingqiu from giving a comprehensive explanation.

“Well I—”

“I’ve tolerated your pranks for long enough. I’ve stayed patient, I’ve let things go. But this—! That’s too far, Xingqiu. How could you— ugh!” He takes a deep breath, tries to steady his emotions, but even Xingqiu can see he’s struggling.

He looks at him one last time before turning on his heel and skulking off, up the steps leading to Yujing Terrace.

“Chongyun, wait!” Xingqiu cries out, and rushes after him.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

Yujing Terrace is unnaturally quiet, but Xingqiu doesn’t have time to dwell on it as he chases after his best friend.

“Chongyun! Look, I'm sorry. I’m sorry. I never meant for it to be like this.” It sounds pathetic, hardly enough to warrant forgiveness, but it’s all he can manage to say as he follows Chongyun’s skulking figure.

He whirls to face him, “be like what? Scare the hell out of me with the thought that I might be dying? That my feelings for y— for someone is the reason why?! Is that funny to you?”

“No! I—” Xingqiu runs a hand through his hair, frustrated, “I do stupid things sometimes. I do. I can’t help it, I just do it. I knew I should have kept this simple, but I thought this would be a good way to— to—”

“To what?” Hisses Chongyun, “to what, Xingqiu?”

He clamps his mouth shut, suddenly, all words escaping him.

What was he supposed to say? Why did he do it? To break the ice? To get a move on? To set things in motion? To let his dream romance story come true?

And slowly, with a sudden clarity, it sinks into him. Like a piece of a puzzle he always knew was there but always in the peripheral, carefully ignored. Because the truth is, he is a hopeless romantic, but his reluctance to initiate their relationship extended far more than that, and he only realizes why now.

He was scared. Archons, how hadn’t he seen it before?

He and Chongyun, they’ve known each other for as long as they can remember. They know each other’s tells, their fears, their hopes. They know what the other dreams about at night when the evenings are cold and the home is colder, when they’re tired and dreading the next daunting morning. They’ve seen each other in their highest moments, their lowest. They’ve been through thick and thin together.

Even when — if? — they decide to finally take the first step and become more than what they currently were, those years won’t just wash away. They won’t just disappear. They were first and foremost best friends before lovers. Two halves of a whole.

Suddenly, Hu Tao’s butterfly flashes across his vision for half a second. Behind his eyes, a spark of red.

A flutter of a wing.

Fragility.

The truth is, Xingqiu…

He’s scared of breaking what they currently have.

He knows Chongyun loves him back, knows it as sure as he knows himself, but that doesn’t stop him from feeling the dread. Dreading change. Archons-damned terrified that whatever they have later will break away what they have now into hollow, dusty pieces.

And maybe that was the pivotal reason why he had wanted, prayed, begged for Chongyun to make the first move.

And now today — this whole day, the ridiculous stunts and desperation, the avoidance to confront the true meaning of hanahaki — tells him that he’s not the only one. Chongyun’s just as worried, just as reluctant to let such a huge change rock their friendship. Change how they view one another.

Gods, they are both idiots, aren’t they?

Archons, he loves Chongyun so much. So much. Even here, before him, with fire in his eyes and looking at him with the most hostility it’s like knives are being needled inch by inch into his heart, Xingqiu is enraptured all the same. There he is, his Chongyun, behind a dipping pink sunset, hair cast in a violet hue and looking so perfect, a picture that he can’t help but stare. He can see all the anger, the glistening sheen of tears. He can see all the fear, the anxiety, that uncertainty of the future that seems so faraway and so distant to reach.

He sees the rawest most damaged parts of Chongyun before him, and Xingqiu loves all of it. He loves it all, he’s never been so sure of something in his life.

Finally, he hangs his head, and whispers weakly, “I really am sorry.”

He doesn’t get a response for a long time. But then there’s some shuffling and Chongyun is a mere foot away. He tilts Xingqiu’s chin up, makes him look him in the eye.

… before smacking him on the back of his head.

“Ow!” Yelps Xingqiu, rubbing and wincing, knowing Chongyun put all his strength into that one whack. But amidst the pain, there’s elation, because that’s when he knows he’s been forgiven.

Chongyun is really terrible at holding grudges.

“You’re an annoying bastard. I despise you.” Chongyun mutters, and Xingqiu just looks at him. He thinks back to that murky green substance, that slime condensate stew, and then thinks of tolerance.

For the first time, he thinks wow, Chongyun must be a saint to be able to put up with him.

He swallows against his dry throat.

“Chongyun.”

“What?”

“I… I never meant to let this go on for so long.”

“What? The prank?”

“No.” Xingqiu locks him dead in the eye, those pale eyes, “you’d never get hanahaki. Never in a million years.”

“What, because it’s not real?”

“Because it stems from unrequited love. And it’s never been unrequited, you stupid, dense, airheaded specimen of a boy. You absolute idiot.” He steps closer, until their chests are almost touching, and rests a hand on Chongyun’s throat, “I was hoping for you to say it. I wanted you to romance me. To whisk me off of my feet and make me feel like I’m from a romance novel.” He sighs dramatically.

There’s a lengthy silence, before the realization appears to only hit Chongyun at that very moment, “wait so that’s why— is that why you— oh. Oh. OH.”

Xingqiu smiles weakly, “now I see that perhaps I was asking too much of you. But it’s okay. I’ve decided now. I’ll say it enough for the two of us.”

With blooming cheeks redder than silk flowers, Chongyun gapes.

“Besides,” he continues with a hum, “I quite like the ambiance here. An empty Yujing Terrace. Sunset. Oh. Wait here.” He hurries off to the patches of grass, wandering here and there, plucking a makeshift bouquet of glaze lilies, before returning.

He hands it to the boy, who takes it wordlessly. Trembling. With stars in his eyes and fire under his skin.

Xingqiu cups his cheek, “Chongyun, you are first and foremost my very best friend. You’re the moon in my orbit. You’re the cryo to my hydro. You’re like… my bookmark in the crazy library of my life!”

“Okay, cool it a little,” Mumbles Chongyun, but he’s smiling, oh he’s smiling so wide.

“Yeah I agree I have no idea where I was going with that. But my point is,” he squeezes their hands, “I don’t want anything to change between us. I really don’t. But then I realized, nothing will. Not really. We were always each other’s. Now we just have the title of boyfriend to prove it.”

“… did you get that from one of your—”

“Yes I did get it from one of my novels so please, just indulge me this once.”

A small smile, “alright. Fine. You’re right. I have always been yours.”

Xingqiu leans forward until their foreheads knock together, “take more of me. I’m giving it. Hold my hand in the streets, kiss my head as I read, be by my side just as you always have been. You mean more than Teyvat to me, Chongyun, and I’m tired of waiting. I’ll scream it to Celestia if I have to.”

“Oh no, please don’t—”

But Xingqiu’s already pulled away, looking up at the sunset sky, and yells at the top of his lungs, “I! AM! IN! LOVE! WITH! CHONGYUN!”

“Xingqiu—”

“DID YOU HEAR THAT, WORLD? I LOVE HIM. I’LL SAY IT NOW, I’LL SAY IT AGAIN.”

Chongyun’s face very much resembles a pyro slime right now, “Xingqiu!”

Xingqiu inhales deeply, and releases, “I LOVE— mmph!”

The world spins on its axis, and he trails his hands to cup Chongyun’s cheeks gently. Pulling their faces closer, parting his lips ever so slightly against his. He allows himself to melt into the kiss, relish it, before the boy pulls away quickly.

“You were hoping I’d do that, weren’t you?” He looks disapprovingly at him, but he’s still blushing red, red, red.

“Of course I was. You know me. That’s just peak romance.”

The boy begins to object, which Xingqiu was fully prepared to shut up with another kiss of his own, when he randomly and suddenly wonders why the terrace has been so quiet.

Not even a second after he thinks that, the place erupts into chaos, shrieking cheers and applause from all around as people jump out of their hiding spots behind rocks, bushes, walls and pavilion doors. Even the ponds.

He sees a sea of familiar faces, and some not so familiar.

He sees Kazuha, and Beidou, side by side and cheering loud as ever.

He sees Mr Zhongli and Childe, as well. Hu Tao. Yanfei. Madame Ping, Ganyu, Keqing. Xiangling, Shenhe. He sees the toy shop keeper and the storytellers, fish merchants and adventurer’s guild members.

He sees this sea of faces gathered around, like a crowd at a theater.

He feels Chongyun shrink beside him, but Xingqiu? He relishes it.

“Well done, kiddo!” Calls out Beidou, and Kazuha from beside her gives him a thumbs up.

“You did good, Comrade!” Cries Childe, perched on a high wall.

“Let me cook you a celebratory meal!” Insists Xiangling.

“Congrats!” Says some guy he doesn’t even know.

Even Shenhe, Shenhe of all people, is smiling quietly and wordlessly from the sidelines.

He stares at this sea of faces, and suddenly realizes that perhaps he wasn’t as well-tuned into Liyue Harbour’s hustle and mills as he had once thought, “maybe I have been blind. How long have you guys been waiting for this? I can’t believe I never noticed. Are we Beigguang 2.0?”

A few people laugh, but Beidou herself just looks unimpressed, “I still have no idea what you’re on about, kid.”

And he’s flooded on all sides by people. Hugging him, congratulating him. Even his brother is there, archons, and his parents. It feels like a wedding with the sheer excitement permeating the air, and honestly he’s not complaining.

This ending is by far better.

And just for a cherry on top, for a little pizzazz, he twirls Chongyun around to kiss him one last time, enjoying the eruption of a new wave of cheers. He always did have a flair for dramatics, being the hopeless romantic he is.

✳︎✳︎✳︎

✳︎✳︎✳︎

✳︎✳︎✳︎

BONUS

When they’re finally able to breathe after the throng of congratulations being hurled at every corner, the two go over to speak to Shenhe, who had remained trained in her spot the whole time, unmoving.

She raises an eyebrow as they approach, and though she doesn’t do or say anything else, he knows she’s feeling at least a little smug about it all.

“Don’t think this excuses you ruining my prank back then,” he warns, but there’s no bite to it, “this may have turned out well, but pranks are meant to be funny!”

She just shrugs, “misunderstandings are not, though. Better to be upfront.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

Just then, a deep female voice cuts through the celebrations, husky and causing a lull to fall across the terrace.

“What’s this? Moonchase come early this year?” And the crowd splits to reveal Yelan, arms folded and looking curiously amused, if not slightly irritated. The commotion must have distracted her from important… whatever she does. What does she do anyway?

Of course, being the trained emotional connoisseur he is, he feels Shenhe stiffen imperceptibly, and immediately understands what’s happening.

He cups his palms over his mouth and shouts towards the newcomer, “Miss Yelan! It’s me!”

Her eyes flicker towards him.

He waves and then points to Shenhe beside him, who looks even more shell-shocked once Yelan’s gaze shifts to her instead.

“This is Chongyun’s aunt! I think she finds you cute! You should ask her out!”

“Xingqiu.” Shenhe hisses into his ear with fire in her eyes.

He blinks up innocently at her, “what? You yourself said that when it comes to matters of the heart, being upfront about it is best. Did you not say that?”

She isn’t given a chance to even answer when a flash of blue materializes before then and Yelan is there, arms folded with a scoff, “is that so? Shenhe, is it?”

She doesn’t respond, still glaring at Xingqiu.

Yelan reaches over to gently turn Shenhe’s face towards her instead, “I wouldn’t mind a drink. How about a trip to the Yanshang Teahouse. How’s that sound?”

Shenhe seems at a loss for words for a few moments before nodding, and it’s all Yelan needs before she takes the woman’s hand and pulls her away.

Watching them retreat, Chongyun clicks his tongue disapprovingly, “you just had to do that?”

“What? She helped me, I help her. Now we’re even.”

“That was very petty of you.”

“You love me.”

A long sigh, “yes. Yes I do.”