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"Twice a day, with meals, and then we'll have a checkup in a week," Shelby Goodkind says, holding a small medicine bottle between her thumb and forefinger.
The client nods, holding the patient - an enormous, fluffy Ragdoll cat - in her arms. Shelby places the medicine in a bag then turns her attention to the cat, scratching him just behind the ears. "And stay out of trouble, mister," she says affectionately.
"Thank you so much, Shelby," the owner, Leah, says earnestly. "You're a real lifesaver." Ralph purrs contently in her arms as Shelby continues to shower him with attention.
"If you notice him throwing up in the next twenty-four hours call the emergency line," Shelby instructs, "We've given him an injection that should stop the vomiting. Lots of fresh water, but he might be lacking appetite, which is completely normal. Just feed him his usual food, little and often."
Leah nods along with Shelby's instructions. "He'll be okay though?"
"Should be back to normal in no time." Shelby smiles reassuringly and Leah's worry lines ease up. "Just keep him away from the butter."
When Ralph looks between them both Shelby's sure she sees a scowl of protest.
Leah leaves in a cloud of thanks and Shelby turns to her computer to write up her notes, a small smile playing over lips. She loves being a vet, especially when there's a characterful patient like Ralph; has loved animals all her life and has always wanted to help them, so going to veterinary school after completing her bachelors had been a simple decision. But even in Shelby's wildest dreams she'd never predicted the acceptance letter from Cornell that had sat waiting for her on the family kitchen table.
It had been a point of contention, moving half way across the country to New York State, but one that fell on Shelby's deaf ears. Her time at Texas A&M, away from the judging eyes of her father had been liberating, so by the time the opportunity to move out of the state was in her hands Shelby had already decided she was going to take it.
Shelby had flown through the four years, working harder than she'd ever worked before, thanks mainly to her type-A personality, and a deep-rooted desire to prove to her parents that she wasn't making a mistake. She hadn't. She'd graduated with honors, and had quickly settled into her current role in a little town in upstate New York, where she'd been practicing for the past couple of years, her life in Texas now a distant memory.
Shelby scans over her calendar, the last half hour of the day is free for emergency appointments but it doesn't look like any have come through. She smiles, thankful that she'll get out on time tonight, then pulls up her emails to get on with a bit of admin she hadn't had chance to get done earlier in the day, scanning her eyes over the lab results back from a biopsy for another one of her patients.
Shelby's concentrating when a commotion from the reception reaches her ears. Frowning, she tries to tune it out and focus on the complex medical terminology, but the voices rise until they're intrusive, and Shelby sighs as she gets up to go to see what the trouble is.
She stops dead at the sight that greets her in the small reception.
There's an incredibly handsome woman stood at the front desk, gesticulating wildly, wavy brown hair scraped back into a tight ponytail, her cheeks flushed red through tan skin. She's wearing workout gear: a loose fitting, beaten up tee that stops at the shoulder, exposing toned, tan arms, and with fading letters reads 'Hopewell Lake Basketball' paired with tight running shorts that leave very little to the imagination. A huge Alsatian stands on a leash by her side, on three of its legs, holding its rear paw off the ground.
"Fuck, no you don't get it; I'm not the owner, so my name won't be on your system," she's saying, barely taking a breath. "Like I said, my name's Toni Shalifoe, I'm Martha Blackburn's friend." It's clear she's trying to remain calm, but Shelby can see a vein throbbing in her forehead and notices the way her a muscle in her jaw clenches.
"I'm sorry but we need to speak to Miss Blackburn to ensure she's happy for us to take a look. It's a liability thing," the receptionist, Dot, is explaining calmly.
"And I've already told you, Marty's in Europe, it's the middle of the fucking night there. Can't you just get it sorted and then she won't even need to know that I fucked up."
Dot frowns, "Like I said, she'll have to be informed. She needs to sign a waiver-"
Toni's face changes from anger to abject fear in a second. "Please. Please just help me, this dog is like her fucking child, she's going to fucking kill me when she finds out."
"Look, I am not authorized-"
"It's okay Dot," Shelby cuts in, finally pulling her eyes away from Toni's arms, which had been flexing distractingly as she gesticulated, and two heads snap to see her stood in the doorway for the first time. "Let's take a look and then we can see if we actually need to do anything that requires the owner's consent."
"Fuck," Toni whispers as she breathes out a rush of air. "Thank you, thank you so much."
Shelby smiles, she's dealt with a lot of emotional pet owners before, but none quite like the whirlwind Toni's created, especially as it hardly looks like a life-or-death situation; actually the Alsatian seems completely nonplussed about its injury and has been staring up dotingly at Toni the whole time. "Follow me."
Toni's almost standing on Shelby's heels as she leads her down the clinically lit corridor and into her consultation room, and when Shelby's closed the door behind them, Toni shifts her weight from foot to foot, like she's about to fight in a boxing match.
"What seems to be the problem?" Shelby asks gently, trying to relax Toni with her tone.
"It's his leg, I was taking him on a run and we were going past a building site and there must have been something on the ground that I didn't see and then he just yelped out of nowhere and by the time I turned around he'd gashed his leg open, and he's not putting any weight on it, and Martha's gonna flip, like you should have seen her when her rabbit died, she was in tears for days and-"
Shelby places a hand on Toni's shoulder, stopping her mid-ramble.
"Hey, you need to calm down. Breathe."
Toni gulps in a few deep breaths and seems to settle a little bit, but she keeps shifting her weight nervously, passing the leash back and forth between her hands like it might burn her.
"Why don't we start with something easy. What's his name?" Shelby asks, stooping to offer her palm for the Alsatian to sniff.
"This is Duke," Toni replies, taking another steadying breath.
"Hi Duke," Shelby addresses the dog, who is thumping his tail meekly as Shelby begins to rub between his ears. "It sounds like you've done yourself a mischief and got Toni here real worried. Can I take a look?"
Duke looks up at her with big, brown, adoring puppy eyes. Shelby straightens up and notices Toni's stopped fidgeting with the leash, and is rubbing awkwardly at the back of her neck. It might be Shelby's imagination, but Toni's cheeks look just a shade redder.
Shelby unclips a ramp from the wall and positions it against a metal table that sits in the centre of the room. "If you could get him up here, please."
"Oh right," Toni mumbles, her husky voice a little calmer, "Duke, come here boy. That's it, up there."
"Good boy," Shelby says when Duke is on the table, towering over them both. Then, turning to Toni asks, "Can you get him to lie down?"
"Uh, yeah, I think so. Hey Duke, down."
The dog blinks back at Toni over his shoulder.
"Shit, I don't think he knows that command," Toni says like she's apologizing on Duke's behalf. "Um, he can sit? Yeah sit, Duke sit?" Toni flounders.
Duke stares at her for a moment longer, like he's considering the instruction, then sits heavily on the table, and a metal clang echoes around the room.
Shelby smiles at her, then taps her finger on the table between Duke's legs, using the noise to draw his attention. "Duke. Down." Shelby says it firmly, less like a question as Toni had done.
Duke lies down immediately, focused on Shelby, ears alert for the rustle of a treat bag. Shelby chuckles and looks over to Toni, surprised when she sees Toni staring at her intensely, her body taught, like she's fighting a bodily reaction to lie down herself. Shelby's chuckle dissolves into a shy smirk, feeling a blush rise to her cheeks under Toni's unwavering eye contact, and tries not to think about the little bead of sweat at Toni's temple, remaining evidence of the cardio she's come straight from.
"Good boy!" Shelby says enthusiastically, turning her attention back to Duke and reaching into her vet coat for a treat, noticing Toni's throat bob in her peripheral vision as she does. There's a flutter in Shelby's stomach that she tries to quash, and she reminds herself that there is an injured animal that needs her attentions, and their name is Duke, not Toni.
Duke has laid with his injured leg away from his body and Shelby quickly identifies the gash. It's pretty nasty, almost down to the bone, but luckily it's barely bleeding. Shelby takes her time, lifting Duke's leg gently, and feeling her way along it for any indication of other injuries, then checks the pads of his paws, before delivering her diagnosis.
"Just a nasty cut. He needs a couple of stitches and some antibiotics, but he will be fine."
Tension visibly ebbs from Toni's frame. "Thank fuck."
"When did he last eat?"
"This morning."
"Okay, I'll give him an antibiotic injection today, disinfect the wound and bandage it up, and put a cone on to stop him licking at it, but you'll need to come in tomorrow for the stitches."
"Does this mean I'll have to tell Martha?" Toni asks quietly, like a child that's asking a teacher if she's going to tell her mom.
"I'm afraid so," Shelby says sympathetically. "We'll have to put him under, so don't feed him tomorrow morning. It's a simple enough procedure, but there are always risks of complications; we will need that waiver."
"Fuck, okay. Shit, sorry for the swea-"
Shelby doesn't know why she does it, but she reaches out again for Toni's shoulder, and lightly squeezes her fingers over the muscle, stopping Toni mid apology. "I know it's not my place, but I'm sure she'll understand Toni. It sounds like it was an honest accident."
Toni shakes her head. "I should have gone a different way. I knew that building site was there, I just didn't think. It was fucking stupid of me."
"I think you're bein' a little hard on yourself," Shelby murmurs softly, her Texan accent becoming a little thicker, her hand still moving under its own volition, sliding to rub a small circle on Toni’s back with her fingers. "I'm sure Martha wouldn't have left Duke with you if she didn't trust you unconditionally. People are real protective of their pets."
Toni looks at her, really looks at her; her eyes momentarily flicking down Shelby's body before snapping back to meet her gaze, all intense and swirling with the flecks of amber, picked out by the bright strip lighting overhead; Shelby can see the hurt and worry in them. But they soften as they hold each other's gaze's, anxiety fading just a touch, and Shelby feels heat rising up her neck again.
She removes her hand from Toni's body quickly, realizing too late she'd left it there too long for it to be professional, and turns back to her desk to hide her embarrassment, reaching into a little fridge below it. She takes her time getting the injection ready, hoping the heat in her cheeks will have cooled a little by the time she turns back to Toni.
Duke takes the injection like a champ, whimpering just a little, but not moving and Shelby ruffles his fur with another whispered, "Good boy," and a treat. She cleans and dresses the wound efficiently, her skin prickling as she feels Toni watching her. Embarrassed at her visceral reaction, Shelby avoids Toni's eyes, and tries to focus. It's easier said than done when there's the most attractive person Shelby's ever seen standing no more than three feet away from her.
Shelby's been single since she took this job, and Fatin, in her duty as Shelby's best friend, is always on her case about working too hard and playing too little. Truthfully, Shelby's a little bit of a workaholic, evidenced by her college relationships that all started fun and all ended around exam season, fizzling into nothing as Shelby traded spending time in her bedroom for time in the library.
Living in a small town hasn’t offered up many dating opportunities but Shelby likes it here. She likes her life, and her friends, and her small house and its long, sweeping yard, and most of all her two cats: Simba and Tigger.
In truth, Shelby's always been more of a dog person, but with her work hours and as she currently has no long-term plan she knows it's not the right time. It's hard to do the responsible thing, especially with dogs like Duke, even more so when he gives her that pleading, please-can-I-have-another-treat look, like he's doing right now.
Shelby finishes up and reaches for another treat - her heart isn't made of stone - and Duke thumps his tail against the metal table happily as he accepts it gently.
"You're really good with him," Toni says.
Shelby's blush returns almost instantly at the compliment, even though she's heard it before. She's always had a way with animals, always able to calm down a scared kitty, or make a disgruntled dog behave with a snap of her fingers. Looking at Toni, no longer a bundle of anxious nerves, Shelby wonders if her skills extend to animals of the non-furry variety; Toni's now smiling at her, almost shyly, and Shelby stomach flutters again, unbidden.
"Thank you, Toni," Shelby replies.
"So tomorrow?" Toni asks, after a silence that's just a fraction too long, raising her eyebrows a touch.
"Oh, yes," Shelby spins back to her appointment calendar. "How does ten sound?"
"Sounds good."
"Great, I'll see you then."
"Will do..." Toni trails off in question.
"Oh- goodness, where are my manners? Shelby. I'm Shelby."
"See you tomorrow, Shelby."
...
Shelby's into work earlier than usual the next morning and arrives before the rest of the team are in. Her night - spurred on by the self-care glass of wine and those recurring stomach flutters - had shamefully spiraled into a bit of harmless internet stalking. It turns out that Toni Shalifoe has her socials tightly locked, but Duke’s owner Martha doesn’t; Shelby had been blessed with photos of Toni on various birthdays and holidays over the years, laughing with her head thrown back in late afternoon sunlight. Google had elicited a few articles and the knowledge Toni worked in a bar; including one with an incredible picture of Toni holding a cocktail shaker by her head, smiling candidly as the photo was taken, those maddeningly distracting biceps flexing in the low light of the room.
Okay, so maybe Shelby had done a lot of harmless stalking, but there's something about Toni makes Shelby want to know everything about her. It's only after Simba, curled on her lap, had given a dissatisfied sigh at not being fussed that Shelby forced herself to put aside her phone and had exclaimed out loud, “It’s just a silly little crush!”
She could have sworn that Tigger had shaken his head at her.
Shelby feels her pulse spike at the memory, of the latent terror of what would have happened if her finger had slipped once she had got all the way back to 2015 on Martha’s feed. But it's a weird kind of fear; she's been nervously excited all morning, and now as she pulls on her scrubs she feels giddy with it.
The morning flies by, and because the feeling doesn't dissipate Shelby doesn't really get anything done. She flits from task to task, eyes always flicking to the clock, and has to read her emails three times over before actually absorbing the content. She notices amongst them is Martha's waiver, signing over permission for Toni to act on her behalf, which has her feeling weirdly excited all over again.
Dot buzzes her to let her know her appointment's here, and Shelby walks into the reception with her heart in her throat. Toni's sat there waiting, dressed in a plain black tee and jeans today, Duke leashed and seated by her side, dutifully wearing his cone. When Toni looks up and sees Shelby she smiles, her eyes crinkling into it. She's more relaxed today, and Shelby notices how well it suits her, sat with one leg crossed over the other, her foot by her thigh, and her arm thrown over the back of the chair next to her.
"All ready for you," Shelby says, barely recognizing the pitch of her voice.
She leads Toni into her room again, Toni following further behind this time, Duke not limping as badly this morning. They get him up on the table so Shelby can take another look at the wound, which is starting to heal already, before she starts to run through the legalities with Toni.
All Toni's casual confidence disappears as Shelby details all the worse case scenarios that putting an animal under anesthetic can have. The color drains from her cheeks and she starts to twist a ring on her index finger. By the time Shelby's finished and asks, "Any questions?" Toni looks like she's going to be sick. But she just shakes her head and braces her hands either side of her on the table like she's trying to ground herself. Without thinking, Shelby's hand is on top of hers. Toni's eyes flick to it, then up to face her, but she doesn't pull away.
It's against protocol to pass judgement on an operation before it happens, but Shelby can't bear the sight of Toni before her, clearly beating herself up again for putting Duke in this position in the first place. "Can I tell you something, off-record?" She asks.
Toni nods, her eyes shining.
"It's going to be fine, Toni. Duke's a young, healthy animal. He's been under anesthesia before when he was neutered, so it's really, really unlikely that there will be any complications. I promise you I'll take good care of him."
Toni gives her a small smile, a twinkle of it reaching her eyes again. Shelby feels a little ripple in her stomach. Toni's really handsome when she smiles.
"I read your bio, sounds like he's in excellent hands."
Shelby blushes, her heart fluttering at the thought that Toni had also looked her up - albeit with a more legitimate excuse. The biography had been the practice manager, Nora’s, idea. She'd made them write them themselves and it had been as painful as hyping yourself up in third person always is. "Lord, how embarrassing," Shelby tries to laugh it off, pulling her hand back to cover her face, wishing the ground would swallow her. Of course the hottest girl she's ever seen in her life has read that. Toni probably thinks she's an asshole.
"It's not!" Toni protests earnestly, "You graduated top of your class, that's like, so far from embarrassing."
"Thanks." Shelby blushes.
"And Duke was so much better after you'd seen him yesterday, you're like an animal whisperer."
"That'll be the painkiller, not me."
"Nah, it was your magic touch. He told me."
Shelby smiles. She might be wrong, but it almost feels like Toni's flirting with her. Almost. She's probably just really grateful Shelby's helped her out with her friend's dog. She's probably just being nice. Shelby had told herself as much last night.
"So he'll be ready to pick up later on today."
"Dope, I'm only like five minutes away so I'll be here when you say so. Just call me and say, 'Toni, come,' and I'll be over in a flash." Toni's going red as soon as the words leave her mouth and she flinches. "Fuck, sorry, that was... I just meant- you were so good with getting Duke to behave..."
"That maybe I could get you to behave too?" Shelby finishes, with more confidence than she feels. Maybe there was a tiny, little, infinitesimal, kernel of a chance that Toni is flirting with her.
"I, uh..." Toni's eyes dart to the floor. "God, that sounds so bad when you say it like that- I didn't mean that I'm like..."
Shelby shakes her head, suppressing a chuckle at the hole Toni's digging herself, "No, no, I know what you mean."
Toni cocks her head to the side slightly, a furrow between her eyebrows, like she's trying to work something out, which makes Shelby think that perhaps she doesn't know what Toni means, but she brushes it off with, "I'll call you when we're all done. It'll probably be this afternoon, we observe them while the anesthesia wears off."
"Yeah, cool, I'm free all day so..."
"What's your number?"
Toni's eyebrows knit and she stutters, "M-my number?" like Shelby's just asked her to perform a strip tease, a thought that once it's annoyingly flashed into Shelby's head, she can't get rid of.
"To call you, later," Shelby prompts, "I only have Martha as the point of contact."
"Oh gotcha. 'Course, yeah, my number."
Shelby hands Toni a scrap of paper and a pen then watches as Toni scrawls her name and number onto the paper, followed by 'Duke's buddy' in brackets afterwards.
"In case you forget," she explains as she hands the paper back. "I'm sure you have a lot of numbers."
Like Shelby could forget her. "I wouldn't worry about that, you're pretty memorable."
A flicker of surprise registers briefly on Toni's face. "Yeah?"
It's Shelby's turn to flounder. "I just meant we don't get many people turning up unannounced in workout gear."
"Oh, right." Shelby might be imagining it but she could swear Toni sounds disappointed.
"So, I'll call you."
"I'll be waiting."
...
The procedure goes smoothly, just as Shelby had predicted. Duke's barely under for more than fifteen minutes and three stitches later he's in recovery being supervised. Shelby'd been extra careful, so much so the nurse had asked her if she was okay, but Shelby thinks she'd brushed it off easily enough.
But as time creeps forward, it dawns on Shelby that this might be the last time she sees Toni. Sure she has her number now, but it's not like she can do anything with it, she's worked too hard for this job to be fired for breaking client data laws. Still, when Shelby calls Toni later that day it's from her personal phone, using the weak excuse that this particular client requires a more personal touch. Dot's good at her job, but can come across a little abrasive over the phone, and in their few interactions alone, Shelby knows it'll be enough to have Toni panicking all over again.
Toni arrives in the five minutes she promised it would take and crouches to receive Duke when Shelby brings him out for her. Duke bounds into her open arms with a slobbery lick to her cheek, and Toni laughs as she wraps him in a bear hug. Shelby's heart melts at the sight, especially when Toni twists to look up at her with a huge, lopsided grin.
"You're a hero," she says, pushing Duke off affectionately and getting to her feet.
Shelby bites her lip and shakes her head. "Just doin' my job."
"Well I think you're pretty awesome."
I think you're pretty awesome too. Shelby bites back the thought before it becomes solid words that she can't take back. She barely knows Toni, she can't start saying things like that.
"You're too nice," she says instead.
"Ask any of my friends and they'd tell you the opposite," Toni laughs, "and I'm sure Marty will be riding my ass for years about this."
"Accidents happen and you did the right thing coming straight here."
"Yeah, I think so too." Toni smiles at her in a way that makes Shelby's breath catch and suddenly the air in the room feels thick. Shelby notices something in Toni's eyes, and Toni opens her mouth as if she's about to ask her something, but then closes it again quickly, whatever it was vanishing in an instant.
"We need another appointment," Shelby blurts.
Toni's eyebrows raise a fraction and an easy smile returns to her lips. "Oh, yeah?"
To most people coming to the vets is a tolerable inconvenience at best, but Toni almost sounds happy about it.
"I need to change the dressing in a few days. How long are you watching Duke for?" Shelby asks it like her heart isn't skipping in her chest. She feels like a house of cards and braces herself against Toni's breath. One sentence and it would all come crashing down.
"Another week at least," Toni says.
Not the last time then. Shelby's heart does a happy flutter. Internally, she tells herself to get a grip, but that doesn't stop her visceral reaction, and she only just manages to suppress a squeak of delight. "I'll need to see you at least twice more."
Toni's smile widens. "Yeah, of course. For Duke."
"For Duke," Shelby agrees.
"To change his dressing," Toni says.
"To check how he's getting on."
Toni bites her lip like she's trying to contain her smile, like she's read something on Shelby's face. "Guess I'll be seeing you soon then."
...
Shelby can barely wait to call Fatin that evening and give her a full debrief. Easily her biggest hype-woman, Shelby'd met Fatin in her first week at Cornell and they'd been close friends ever since. Both older students (Fatin having moved after a family-mandated stint at Julliard) they'd gravitated towards each other in their opposite natures; Fatin brusque and Shelby the picture of politeness.
Shelby's spent the rest of the afternoon rehashing and over-analyzing the whole interaction with Toni, swinging from 'she's just nice' to 'she was flirting with me' a thousand times over. By the time Fatin calls Shelby's gone in so many circles she feels dizzy.
"I don't know what's wrong with me Fatin, I keep touching her! And I can't believe I told her I could make her behave," Shelby groans into the speaker, Simba curled up and purring on her lap. "What on God's green earth was I thinking?"
"Shelby, babe, that was genius, I can practically see her jaw on the floor from here."
"What if she's not like that?" Shelby asks, worrying her bottom lip. "What if I've got it all wrong and she's got a husband and kids at home waiting for her?"
"Have you ever been wrong before?" Fatin asks pointedly.
"No," Shelby mumbles.
"Then stop trying to talk yourself out of this. I will not let you self-sabotage. And so what if she is straight? You gotta shoot your shot. Besides, she is hot for you," Fatin clicks her fingers on each word like she's trying to snap some sense into her. "Babe, you don't look forward to a vet's appointment for your friend's sick dog unless you want to fuck the vet."
"Fatin!"
"Someone's gotta tell you straight." Shelby can imagine Fatin shrugging as she says it.
"I'm sure she doesn't want to... y'know... we barely know each other."
"Shelby, everyone wants to fuck you, look at yourself."
"I'm going to hang up Fatin," Shelby says with faux annoyance.
Fatin laughs. "Okay, okay, wait, wait, wait. Just ask her out, what's the worse that could happen?"
"She could sensationally reject me, report me to Nora, I could get fired and end up on the streets with nothing but my cats for warmth."
At the other end of the line Fatin whistles. "Uh, yeah, no. Babe, you're way overthinking this. None of that's going to happen. You've already got her number, so talk to her. It'll be fine, trust me."
It's the evening after her late night conversation with Fatin and Shelby braces her palms on the counter, the words ringing in her ears as she stares at the unlocked screen of her phone. A message is ready-typed, sitting in the bottom bar, waiting to be sent. Shelby's been staring at the screen for a long, long time. She shouldn't. She really shouldn't. But, what, were they going to fire her for checking in on a patient's wellbeing after-hours? A disciplinary, sure. A stern talking to about misuse of client's data perhaps.
It's so unlike her to break the rules she wonders what kind of drug Toni Shalifoe has her under. But Fatin is right, something about it feels worth it; everything about Toni draws her in: her eyes, her body, her voice, which rough but so, so soft at the same time. The way she smells, like sandalwood and pine, and fresh cut-grass, both new and exciting while nostalgic and comforting; like something in the fiber of Shelby's being has been waiting for this her whole life. For her.
It's intense. Shelby's being intense, she knows that, but she's a romantic at heart and there's a tiny voice in the back of her head spurring her on, reminding her that she's always believed in love at first sight.
Even the fiery passion Toni'd shown that first morning at the vets, snapping at Dot had melted Shelby's heart. So quick to fight for something she loved without a care for herself.
It's a couple of days after their last appointment, and a couple of days before their next. It's a perfect time to check in, no? Besides, Toni's a worrier, she's worried, and Shelby can help her. Maybe Duke's not doing so good but Toni doesn't want to run up Martha's insurance bill so she's holding off until their Friday appointment. The logic all stacks up.
Shelby hovers her pointer finger above the send button, hesitating for a fraction, before that little voice is back - the one that disconcertingly sounds a lot like Fatin - and whispers, "Go for it."
Shelby quickly taps the screen before she can change her mind, then locks the phone instantly. Running a hand through her hair she starts pacing back and forth in the kitchen, sweeping her glass of wine into her free hand as she does and taking a long drink.
Tigger meows into a yawn on the couch and looks over at Shelby with a cocked head and sleepy eyes as if to say, 'Can you please calm down? Your anxiety is really messing with the energy in here.'
"What if she thinks I'm lame, or too keen, or just a freakin' weirdo?" Shelby worries back.
Simba's head pops up next to his brother's, the same displeased look of being disturbed on it.
"Lord, what have I done?" Shelby paces with her arm resting on top of her head, her hand tangled in the hair at the back. What was she thinking? Toni's going to report her. She's going to be fired.
A buzz from the kitchen counter stops her dead. Shakily, Shelby sets the wine glass down and looks at the screen. It's her.
With a deep breath, Shelby flicks the phone open. Both messages appear.
Shelby
Hey, it's Shelby from the vets, just thought I'd check in on how Duke's doing? Hope he's not going too stir crazy with all the house rest.
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
Hi Shelby from the vets. He's doing good, think he misses you though.
Shelby bites her bottom lip in a smile before typing her reply.
Shelby
Not long until I see you again!
See him, I mean
You and him
Together
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
He's looking forward to it.
A selfie comes through a few moments later. Toni's crouched by Duke, grinning into the camera while Duke gives a smile of his own, his tongue lolling from one side. Shelby's heart skips; it's so cute it makes her chest hurt a little. Toni doesn't need to pose next to a dog to look cute of course, but it sure doesn't hurt.
Shelby delays her response as dots indicate Toni is writing appear. They pop up then vanish a couple of times before her next message comes through.
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
I'm looking forward to it too.
Shelby's stomach flips softly and she bites down on her lip a little harder.
Not wanting the conversation to end but not knowing how to respond to that, Shelby rushes over to the sofa and scoops Tigger and Simba into one arm, before snapping a selfie back, only really concentrating on what she looks like. The cats are a little blurred, but Shelby knows she's hardly going to get a better one as they twist out of her grip and back onto the couch, so sends it anyway.
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
Wow. Okay.
That's just unfair
Shelby
What is??
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
Srsly, you should warn people before sending pictures like that
Shelby's heart drops into her stomach as she frantically scrolls back up. She's convinced she's accidentally sent a workout pic, or worse, a topless photo, even though she's never taken a topless photo or - oh God - there are those pictures of her trying on different bikinis that she sent to Fatin not long ago where Fatin had made her pose like...
Another string of messages pulls the conversation back to the end before Shelby can check.
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
It's too cute, I can't cope
The cats are pretty adorable too.
What are they called?
"Oh thank the Lord," Shelby huffs into the room, laughing in relief, but still confirming for herself that she's sent the right picture before replying.
Shelby
Omg you scared me!
The white one with ginger ears is Simba and the fully ginger one is Tigger. I rescued them a couple of years ago.
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
Scared you how?
You see, you are a hero
Don't tell Marty but I think Duke secretly wants you to adopt him too. I still can't get him to lie down
Shelby
Nvm
I'll give you some tips at your next appointment if you like
Toni (Duke's Buddy)
I would like that a lot, I need all the help I can get
It's easy after that, almost too easy, and they talk well into the night, about everything and nothing like they've always known each other. Toni tells Shelby she's known Martha since childhood and she's more like a sister than a friend, and Shelby tells Toni about her brother and sister, Spencer and Melody, but avoids talk of her parents, with Toni never bring up the topic either. Shelby learns that Toni likes pineapple on pizza but hates olives, gets confirmation that she works in a bar but kinda hates it, and that even though she's in her late twenties she still eats cereal for dinner.
The next morning when Shelby wakes there's another selfie from Toni. She's angled the picture down so Shelby can see Duke sat as his food bowl. Toni's face is in the foreground, a lopsided, easy-going smile on it, and she's giving the camera a thumbs up. The message beneath it reads: Breakfast time means medicine time! Shelby chuckles then fires off, good job! with a suggestion to hide the pill in some ham if Toni has any.
It's like that for the next couple of days, Toni snapping pictures of herself and Duke, seemingly using any opportunity, going so far as to send Shelby a photo of them both tucked up in bed one morning, Toni's hair disheveled across the pillow and Duke on his back beside her, fast asleep. It's that one Shelby loves most of all, that tiny glimpse into what it would be like to wake up next to Toni that has Shelby's heartbeat racing for the hills.
It's not a one way street. Shelby sends a few back, one of her in her scrubs in between appointments, one of her posing with some of the rescue puppies they have in at the moment, and then a few in the evening, carefully bribing the cats to stay with her on the couch so she can use them as an excuse.
It's little surprise that Shelby's incredibly nervous when the day of Toni's penultimate appointment arrives. She feeds the cats twice that morning, forgetting she's already put down food and only remembering on her drive to work, then works her way through the day with jitters between clients, just about managing to focus when her hands are busy.
She's booked Toni in for the last appointment of the day and right now that feels like a terrible idea. But the day passes, albeit slowly, and before she knows it Rachel, another one of the vets, is leaning against her doorway, a confused look on her face.
"One of your clients is here for you," she says.
"Ralph?" Shelby asks, thinking it's her five o'clock.
"Oh, no, didn't you hear? Leah had to reschedule, it's Toni Shalifoe with Duke."
Shelby looks up at the clock. It's a good half hour before Toni's appointment.
"She's already been here fifteen minutes," Rachel continues. "I offered to see her and get the bandage changed so she could be on her way but she said it was important she saw you..." She trails off and raises an eyebrow.
"Oh, Toni," Shelby says like she hasn't been building up this moment in her head for the last three days. "That's okay, she's a little anxious, it's not her dog."
"Right..." Rachel says, like that's just confused things further.
"It's a long story, I'll tell you some other time, best not keep her waiting."
"Uh huh."
Toni leaps to her feet when Shelby appears in the waiting room, radiating the same nervous energy Shelby feels, but then their eyes meet and Toni smiles at her, big and toothy and genuine, and both of their anxiety seems to evaporate.
"Miss Shalifoe," Shelby says, being ultra polite for the benefit of Dot, who is watching the whole exchange over the edge of her computer screen with narrowed eyes. "Please follow me."
"Sure."
"How's he getting on?" Shelby asks once they're in the privacy of her consultation room, like Toni hasn't been texting her constant updates.
"He's doing great, aren't you Duke?" Toni says with a pat to his head and ruffling his fur around his cone. "I'm really gonna miss him when I'm gone." Her eyes meet Shelby's as she says it and Shelby imagines she's talking about more than just Duke. "I'm actually converted," Toni goes on, sweeping the moment under the carpet before the air can thicken. "I always thought I was a cat person, but Duke has changed my mind, I think it's a solid tie now."
For some reason that makes Shelby even happier. "I'd love a dog someday."
"Yeah?"
"For sure. But I work long hours. Maybe when I find someone and settle down we could make it work, but since it's just me right now it's not the right time."
Toni smiles, a glimmer of sadness clouding her complexion. "Find Mr. Right, then get the dog, sounds like a good plan."
"Oh- I- um," Shelby hesitates, "It would actually be Mrs. Right, or Miss. Right I guess, don't want you to think I'd be stealing someone's wife!" She chuckles nervously, "I'm, um, I'm a lesbian." For some reason her body reflexes and throws her hand into a peace sign that she quickly drops.
Toni's looking at her with wide eyes, like she can't believe what she's hearing. All of a sudden Shelby realizes that Toni might have thought she was straight all this time, and mentally kicks herself for not somehow slipping a past girlfriend into conversation. Her palms suddenly feel sweaty.
She points at Duke, "Shall I take a look?" Shelby's not sure why she's asking Toni. It's her job to take a look. Toni is literally here so Shelby can take a look, but Toni nods, still dumbfounded, and Shelby calls Duke onto the table.
Shelby cleans and redresses the wound, happy to see it's healing nicely, then gives Duke a treat. "Are you being a good boy for Toni?" She asks him, ruffling the fur on his head. Duke cocks his head.
"Peanut butter works well too," Shelby says, turning back to Toni.
"Huh?" Toni looks even more flustered.
"For getting him to take the medicine," Shelby says with a little smile, struggling to reconcile the Toni that comes across as so effortlessly confident when they're messaging and the puppy in headlights she's become.
"Oh. Yeah. Thanks."
"Chunky usually works best, that way they barely notice the pill."
"I'll give it a try."
"And if you want to get him to follow your commands you need to be have a more dominant tone. It's an order not an option."
Toni's throat bobs noticeably as she swallows thickly, her cheeks a shade redder, suddenly refusing to meet Shelby's eyes. "Dominant. Um, sure."
"Tell him exactly what you want. I'm sure you'll get the hang of it."
"I hope so," Toni says, but it's quiet, like her mind is elsewhere.
"If you like dogs you should think about adopting," Shelby suggests, searching for a way to restart an easy conversation and clear any lingering awkwardness. "We're part of a charity program where we help shelter pets get back on their paws and checked over so they can be adopted. I see a lot of really good animals sent that way, I can put you in touch."
Toni's eyes flick back to Shelby's and she gives her a thin smile. "Oh, I can't. I'm house sitting for Marty too. I actually live in Brooklyn, it's a shitty apartment and the landlord has a strict no pets rule. Maybe someday though," she adds quickly, seeing how Shelby's face has fallen.
"Oh, so you're headed back to New York..."
"Marty's home a week today."
Shelby's mouth goes dry. "Right."
Between them, on the table, Duke whines.
"But we've got the final checkup next week, right?" Toni rushes out.
"Yeah, to remove the stitches. How about the 16th at five thirty?" Shelby pretends she hasn't pre-reserved the last slot on a Friday evening for them for a reason.
"Great."
Shelby turns to her computer for a moment to book the appointment in.
"So is that it for now?" Toni asks when Shelby turns back around, her smile fading a touch.
"Yup, all done here."
Toni nods and turns to leave.
"Oh, but Toni?"
Toni turns with her palm on the door handle. "Yeah?"
"Please keep sending me those updates, I like to know how my patients are getting on."
"Of course." Toni's eyes twinkle, her smile reaching her eyes again. "For Duke."
"For Duke."
...
"Oh my god Shelby you have to ask her out, she is like, so completely your type," Fatin's animated voice comes through the tinny phone speaker, looking at the picture of Toni Shelby'd just forwarded.
"I don't know Fatin, when I told her I was a lesbian she didn't say anything..."
"What did you expect? A fucking 'welcome to the club' confetti cannon? Shelby open your eyes, look at that fit for fuck's sake."
Shelby pulls the phone away from her ear and looks at the picture she's sent Fatin. Toni'd sent it to her last night, while she'd been out on a run. It's the first time she's sent Shelby a picture without Duke, although the caption read, Just me, I promise Duke's resting up. Toni's taken it in one of the parks. The sun is setting in the background, catching her hair and shooting highlights of auburn through it. She's in the same Hopewell Lake tee that she'd worn into the vets practice and there's a sheen of sweat on her skin, catching the setting sunlight, making those muscled arms look even better.
"I'm going to send you another," Shelby replies, "She's in sports gear, it's easy to look gay in sporty clothing."
Fatin scoffs, "You've met me right?"
"Your leopard print headband doesn't count as sportswear, Fatin. It's designer."
"Agree to disagree, but please, allow me to prove my point."
"Hang on." Shelby scrolls back through her messages to Toni, heart skipping as she thumbs past picture after picture of Toni smiling back at her, right back to the very top before landing on the first picture Toni'd sent her. That was probably the most indicative, when Toni'd not been expecting her to message at all, Shelby decides. Toni's in a cuffed, loose fitting grey tee, with one square pocket on one side of her chest and black, comfy looking sweatpants. She forwards it to Fatin.
"Oh Shelby she's so gay." Fatin's reply is instant; the message has only just delivered.
"Are you sure?"
"I've literally never been surer of anything in my life."
Shelby pulls the phone away from her ear to look at the picture again. It's a very tomboy, effortlessly-attractive-boybandish kind of look. Maybe Fatin's right.
"Shelby? Shelby? Hello?" Fatin's raised voice comes distantly through the speaker.
"Sorry, sorry, I'm here," Shelby says, pressing the phone back to her ear.
"If you don't ask her out at your final appointment on Friday I swear to God I will haul ass over there and do it for you myself."
It's a threat Shelby knows Fatin will make good on.
"Okay, okay. I'll do it. But if you're wrong and she rejects me we're going to Cheesecake Factory and you are buying me every single desert on the menu."
"Deal."
...
Shelby barely sleeps on Thursday night. She can't stop her mind racing, a million possibilities battling for space. She wakes before her alarm and, too jumpy to sit in her house and wait for time to pass, drives around the block a few times to make sure she doesn't show up at the vets too early.
Thankfully, once she's at work the day passes quickly, and before Shelby can properly ready herself Dot's buzzing her for her last appointment of the day.
Stomach fluttering, Shelby takes a deep breath and wipes her palms on her scrubs. It's show time. She has a plan, she just needs to execute it. Check Duke over, remove his stitches, ask Toni out. It's simple, really. Just a casual dinner and drinks thing, that doesn't have to be a date, but that Shelby most definitely wants to be a date, if Toni also wants it to be a date, but that has totally no pressure to be a date kinda thing.
"Lord," Shelby mutters to herself, running a hand through her hair and trying to stop her spiral. "She's just a girl, calm down."
Rolling her shoulders back and removing the nervous edges from her smile, Shelby heads to the waiting room.
Toni's not there.
Shelby scans the room, a mixture of pets and people, three times, her smile crumbling away as she realizes she hasn't made a mistake. There's no wavy brown hair, no deep brown eyes, no effortless confidence that was bound to dissolve the minute their eyes met.
Shelby's thought about this moment in a million ways but none of them ended like this: with loose ends and empty disappointment. Swallowing thickly, Shelby tastes the bitterness of a missed opportunity on her tongue.
Duke's there, Shelby notices when her attention refocuses, straining at his leash towards her, whining for her attention. Trying to compose herself and be professional, Shelby takes a breath and follows the leash up to the person holding it. Shelby recognizes Martha from Instagram immediately, with her straight brown hair and kind face, and, as Shelby stares, Martha gets to her feet.
"You must be Shelby," the Martha says as she approaches. Duke lifts his muzzle to sniff at Shelby, his wet nose pressing into her empty palm, and wags his tail.
"I am," Shelby tries for a smile that she's sure looks as false as she sounds. "I'm sorry I didn't see you, I was expecting Toni."
"Don't worry about it, I'm Martha. Toni was meant to bring him but she got the dates mixed, our flight actually landed last night. I didn't want to put her to any more trouble."
"Oh, of course." Shelby tries to ignore the hollow pit that sits where butterflies used to. She knows she can't ask the questions she wants to, like if Toni's gone back to Brooklyn already, or if she protested Martha coming in her place, so she seals her lips in a thin line and tries to stop her fingers twitching for her phone.
"Are you okay?" Martha asks.
"Fine," Shelby lies. "Please, right this way."
The checkup is so quick Shelby thinks she might have imagined it. She takes Duke into the back and removes his stitches, but when she's back Martha chatters away, the words not reaching over the ringing in Shelby's ears. Shelby gives thin smiles and nods where instinct tells her it's appropriate, but Martha could be saying anything for all the attention Shelby's really paying.
Shelby's still in a daze when Martha thanks her and leaves. Fumbling in her coat pocket Shelby pulls out her phone and turns off do not disturb, her pulse picking up as she waits for a message, a missed call, a voice note, anything, to come through from Toni. It takes a second, then the screen flashes up with a few notifications. Shelby scans them quickly - a trail of messages in her old Cornell group chat, instagram and twitter likes on her latest posts, a news notification she doesn't bother reading, a message from Fatin that reads you got this, Barbie, but nothing from Toni. Shelby's stomach twists horribly. She's got this all so completely wrong.
She's still staring at her phone when Dot taps tentatively on the door. Shelby panics and throws her phone under a pile of papers on her desk, caught red handed, and tries to look busy.
"There's someone here for you." Dot says, giving her a suspicious look.
Shelby glances at the clock; the day's almost done. "An emergency appointment?" she asks, confused. It's bad timing, she needs this day to end so she can freak out properly.
"No. It's that woman... she's usually with Duke." Dot frowns, "but you just saw Duke... and she's on her own, there's no dog."
Shelby doesn't wait for Dot to elaborate. Suddenly her heart is in her throat and the butterflies in her stomach lurch back to life, and she doesn't think, she rushes from the room, past Dot, breaks into a jog down the corridor, bursts into the empty waiting room and stops dead, chest heaving, wildness in her eyes softening when she sees Toni by the window.
Toni spins around as Shelby enters, dressed in jeans and a loose tee, her face red and breath quick, as if she's just run here on impulse.
"Shelby," Toni says, the word like an accident, like she's saying it before she realizes it.
"You came," is all Shelby can muster in response.
"Yeah..." Toni clasps both of her hands in front of her like she doesn't know what to do with them, bouncing from foot to foot like she does when she's nervous.
Shelby feels a smile curling at her lips, and once it starts she can't stop it blooming until she's grinning. It gives her all the answers she needs. Toni smiles back, the muscles in her shoulders unlocking as the tension in her frame ebbs away.
"You forgot the dog," Shelby teases, giggling as Toni's smile turns bashful.
"Yeah, um, I'm here for me, actually."
"Yeah? You know it's not the ER, don't you?"
"I know, I didn't mean like that. I, um,.." Toni scratches at the back of her neck awkwardly, like now she's started she doesn't know what to say.
"I'm glad you're here because I was meaning to ask you something," Shelby cuts in, knowing now that Fatin was right and deciding to spare Toni any more blushes.
"Oh, sure, you go." Toni looks relieved and she gives Shelby a half-smile.
"I was goin' to ask if you wanted to go out for dinner, with me, tomorrow."
Toni's smile grows impossibly wider and a flicker of disbelief crosses her face. "You're asking me out?" She huffs, laughing like she's been holding her breath.
"If you want," Shelby shrugs, her heart skipping in her chest.
"I was going to ask you!"
Shelby bites her lip to try and contain her happiness, her grin so huge her cheeks ache with it. She closes the distance between them, hesitating for just a moment before Toni, searching her eyes.
Toni tangles their fingers together with one hand, the other coming up to ghost over Shelby's cheekbone. Shelby leans into the touch, suppressing a shiver as goosebumps prickle over her skin.
Toni whispers, "This might be crazy but I've wanted to do this ever since that first day," and then her lips are on Shelby's, gentle and soft and full of unspoken emotions spilling over, and as Shelby kisses Toni back, she knows, deep in her bones, that this is the start of something really, really good.
...
One year later
"Hey, I'm home!" Shelby calls, placing her house and car keys on the kitchen table as she scans the house for Toni. Simba and Tigger yawn on the sofa, disentangling themselves from where they'd been balled as one, both stretching their way over to rub around Shelby's legs.
"Babe did you feed the cats?" Shelby calls into the quiet house, but there's no reply.
At her feet, Tigger mews pathetically. Shelby rolls her eyes, "I don't believe you," she says, scooping the cat into her arms and bopping her nose against his. Tigger purrs back innocently.
Cat still cradled against her, Shelby wanders over to the window on the other side of the living room that looks out onto her huge yard. When Toni'd moved in she'd kept the same cottage, not wanting to upsize the house because the yard had always been her favorite part. It sweeps down to a gulley lined with huge trees, the grass mown in perfect, neat strips and boarded with flower beds that are in full bloom.
She spots Toni at the far end, barefoot, dressed in a sports bra and shorts, playing with a clumsy golden retriever puppy. Shelby's heart swells as he watches Toni drop onto all fours to wind him up, then run off down the lawn, laughing in the late summer sunshine as the puppy chases after her, falling over its own feet as it hurries to catch up.
Placing a kiss on Tigger's head, Shelby returns him to the floor and goes out onto the porch. Toni notices her as she emerges when the screen door clacks against the doorframe and waves, before rolling onto the floor and letting the puppy clamber onto her and start licking her face.
Shelby giggles as she watches for a while, then calls, "Teddy, come!" watching with glee as Teddy straightens up immediately, searching for her, and then breaks into a sprint up the yard, wagging his tail furiously. Shelby fusses him as Toni jogs up the yard to the porch, laughing, and kisses Shelby on the cheek.
"Gross, you're covered in slobber," Shelby protests meekly, before pressing her lips against Toni's. She smells like grass stains and sunscreen.
"You're the one that wanted the dog," Toni jokes, winking at her.
Shelby grins back and wraps her arms around Toni's shoulders. Toni's hands hold her at the waist like they've done a hundred other times. Toni's eyes smile into hers.
Shelby kisses her again and, resting her forehead against Toni's, whispers,"I got everything I ever wanted and more."